I've been doing this for 15 years, not to meet women but because I was interested in many areas. You always have to face rejection unless you are waiting for the woman to ask you out and that almost never happens. Rejection in a bar is a lot easier because you will never see her again but in a social circle you could see her for years. These are some of the ones I tried: 1. Hiphop dancing - 90% women between 18-25yo but there is no interaction in class, you just do a routine together. 2. Acting classes - 50% women and there is a lot of interaction. All ages. Screen acting younger. Probably second best. 3. Hiking - 50% women, most middle aged 4. Social Dancing - 50-40% women, probably the best but you have to learn to dance which requires athletic ability and takes about a year. 5. Cooking - 50% women 6. Investment meetups - 30-40% women, all ages 7. Tennis - 30% women at lower levels. Advanced level almost none. 8. Beach volleyball - 20% women, not much interaction 9. Photography - 50% 10. Singing - 80% women but there is not much interaction 11. Drawing - 60% women So after trying all these I'd say that to really improve cold approaching is the best (and hardest). According to the MMPI-2 I'm more than two standard deviations more extroverted than the average person yet I still found cold approaching pretty hard. So have some perspective and reasonable expectations when you start.
Everyone saying how there's not a lot of women going to events: find events you like that women go to, or just try new experiences. It's never a bad thing to get out of your comfort zone it causes you to grow as a person. For instance, I hate dancing always have had a mental block with it. But I am gonna try it because if I DO find a girl and get married I don't want to suck at my wedding and it'll be a new experience. I am going to attend yoga classes because I enjoy fitness and it's good for your body, and women definitely go to yoga lol. Hiking groups too plenty of women enjoy. And if all else fails, try speed dating!! It's in person, has age specific events, and is literally meant for dating. If you work on yourself, develop your social skills, and are consistent, you WILL find someone. Coming from a guy who's struggled to get 1 date on 5 different dating apps for 6 months.
Amazing stuff, thanks for sharing. I live in a small city in the netherlands (80k people). Meeting women isnt easy, but will give this strategy a good try. Te suposed con isnt really a con. You are just living your live and meeting women on the path is a nice bonus
This all goes out the window when you’re a single dad with young kids. The apps have been very successful for me in this situation…. We don’t have time to waste with kids
That's true, this is much harder when you have kids, especially if you're the sole custody carer - But if you're average or below in looks its very hard to get any results at all on online dating.
Everyone assumes things based on the apps ……get out there and meet someone like in the old days ….if you want to get married , make sure you do not have vices and take them with you in the marriage .
I thought that it was very difficult to meet girls outside online dating. Then I had a mild curiosity for dancing, and I started to attend the most popular place in my city... In the first class I got to talk to over 15 girls (many attractive) during the dance class... at the social later in the evenings there is a line-up to come in... It became clear that dancing is definitely worth investing time in. =) Then I started discovering other social dance venues, social activities like hiking events on eventbrite, groups meditation/cold-plunge events, events at farms, etc. Some of us are more introverted and we can really go hardcore about our nerdy hobbies & interests... do the same with socializing and meeting people! Go all in, don't go half measure!!!! Give yourself 1 year and expose yourself a few times a week to as many new activities as you can. (And ideally do it with friends/wingmen/wingwomen.)
Yeah man, most of the men AND women I meet at dance classes are in fact introverts and slightly shy people - they're friendly and chatty, but they're not so foften the hyper social types you'd expect.
I'm all for doing all this, where I struggle with is running 3 businesses and often being on call to the general public, it's all very well sectioning time off to attend things you want to do to expand your social networks but it's not always easy being self employed, cost of living nowdays you really appreciate being able to pay your mortgage and feed yourself, and I guess socialising does come as a 2nd priority sadly, where it really should be the one thing you should focus on for your mental health. Catch 22
😅 well at least there are the odd video games conventions and anime conventions. I might try to go to see what the easter serves is like and try to plan going to a music fest. 😅
The biggest problem I've found in today's Dating Market is "Social Media" (Not just Dating Apps ) Women have lost the plot there are no average women anymore ....Everyone is a "10" Instagram - TikTok - Facebook etc etc have ruined it. You can meet women at traditional events like Weddings, Church, Workplace, BBQ's Dinner Parties & these women will compare you with the 1,000's of men flattering them & inflating their egos ....Today decent men are being overlooked everyday because Women have no idea of their true "SMV" Dale (Perth Australia)
I'm not sure I agree - I mean, there are women who have massively inflated sense of self value - but I meet a lot of women who don't suffer with this.. Enough especially that you can still find 'regular women' when you look around.
Yes you definitly can - you still need to learn flirting/dating skills, but this can be a good alternative way to meet women while you practice those skills.
You seem to omit some key cons to this approach. Namely, that in a lot of hobbies there are not a lot of girls - and even smaller amount of single girls. And if you are forcing yourself to change into a different person, and go to dance classes that you hate instead of a chess club that you like - this is really unhealthy. Of course, you can try to parry it with "just find an intersection between what you like and what has girls, lol" - but this is still a huge disadvantage that you failed to mention.
If what you like is chess you just have to accept you will have fewer options than a guy who likes hiphop dancing. In that case you are probably better off learning cold approaching.
I'd argue that if the ONLY thing you like is chess club - that you should try to broaden your horizons - I don't mean this to be cruel or glib, but becuase for most of us, living a life that inspires us involves trying new things regularly.. Staying locked in the same life without change is not always good for our mental health.
@@SchoolOfAttraction Of course I try new things regularely - but they are still within the same "niches", and the ones that are out of my niches I don't like when I try. I may try Magic: The Gathering or Warhammer, and I might like it (I'm thinking about giving it a shot now), but I sure as hell would not like dancing or cooking classes. That's what I'm talking about by "forcing to change for women" - sure, I can work on myself to force myself to like these activities, but that's a REALLY BIG downside that you omitted - and I think that this was just intellectually dishonest to not put it in the video, giving the impression that all social events have the equal opportunity to use "lifeslyle network dating".
this is difficult. the women i like don't seem to attend networking activities. I'm so fukt. Meetups in los angeles area suck so bad for meeting women in their 30s. The attendance is majority men, and the few women who do show up are just not attractive.
How can you even dare to mention the saint and holly cold approach... If your claim would have any substantial basis, evidence of your girlfriends should be everywhere. I see nothing.
I wish I could say I was :P - I was eating more than I should while I Was doing overseas coaching events and a few other big events that made it hard to have my regular diet, now I'm slowly taking the weight back off.
I've been doing this for 15 years, not to meet women but because I was interested in many areas. You always have to face rejection unless you are waiting for the woman to ask you out and that almost never happens. Rejection in a bar is a lot easier because you will never see her again but in a social circle you could see her for years. These are some of the ones I tried:
1. Hiphop dancing - 90% women between 18-25yo but there is no interaction in class, you just do a routine together.
2. Acting classes - 50% women and there is a lot of interaction. All ages. Screen acting younger. Probably second best.
3. Hiking - 50% women, most middle aged
4. Social Dancing - 50-40% women, probably the best but you have to learn to dance which requires athletic ability and takes about a year.
5. Cooking - 50% women
6. Investment meetups - 30-40% women, all ages
7. Tennis - 30% women at lower levels. Advanced level almost none.
8. Beach volleyball - 20% women, not much interaction
9. Photography - 50%
10. Singing - 80% women but there is not much interaction
11. Drawing - 60% women
So after trying all these I'd say that to really improve cold approaching is the best (and hardest). According to the MMPI-2 I'm more than two standard deviations more extroverted than the average person yet I still found cold approaching pretty hard. So have some perspective and reasonable expectations when you start.
Nice list man!
Thanks for the list man. Was there much interaction in the hiking groups you joined?
@@Davo198 not much but maybe it’s different on the longer hikes. I did only 10k.
Everyone saying how there's not a lot of women going to events: find events you like that women go to, or just try new experiences. It's never a bad thing to get out of your comfort zone it causes you to grow as a person. For instance, I hate dancing always have had a mental block with it. But I am gonna try it because if I DO find a girl and get married I don't want to suck at my wedding and it'll be a new experience. I am going to attend yoga classes because I enjoy fitness and it's good for your body, and women definitely go to yoga lol. Hiking groups too plenty of women enjoy. And if all else fails, try speed dating!! It's in person, has age specific events, and is literally meant for dating. If you work on yourself, develop your social skills, and are consistent, you WILL find someone. Coming from a guy who's struggled to get 1 date on 5 different dating apps for 6 months.
Well said!
One hell of a video. 🔥 Really cool. Was recently thinking that this is the approach I'll be doing in the next years.
Amazing stuff, thanks for sharing. I live in a small city in the netherlands (80k people). Meeting women isnt easy, but will give this strategy a good try. Te suposed con isnt really a con. You are just living your live and meeting women on the path is a nice bonus
This all goes out the window when you’re a single dad with young kids. The apps have been very successful for me in this situation…. We don’t have time to waste with kids
That's true, this is much harder when you have kids, especially if you're the sole custody carer - But if you're average or below in looks its very hard to get any results at all on online dating.
80+ matches in 1 week and talking to 12 girls and 4 dates, so i must be doing something right lol@@SchoolOfAttraction
Interesting to hear about your online success. Would you say you're an above average looking guy?
Everyone assumes things based on the apps ……get out there and meet someone like in the old days ….if you want to get married , make sure you do not have vices and take them with you in the marriage .
I thought that it was very difficult to meet girls outside online dating. Then I had a mild curiosity for dancing, and I started to attend the most popular place in my city... In the first class I got to talk to over 15 girls (many attractive) during the dance class... at the social later in the evenings there is a line-up to come in... It became clear that dancing is definitely worth investing time in. =)
Then I started discovering other social dance venues, social activities like hiking events on eventbrite, groups meditation/cold-plunge events, events at farms, etc.
Some of us are more introverted and we can really go hardcore about our nerdy hobbies & interests... do the same with socializing and meeting people!
Go all in, don't go half measure!!!! Give yourself 1 year and expose yourself a few times a week to as many new activities as you can. (And ideally do it with friends/wingmen/wingwomen.)
Yeah man, most of the men AND women I meet at dance classes are in fact introverts and slightly shy people - they're friendly and chatty, but they're not so foften the hyper social types you'd expect.
I'm all for doing all this, where I struggle with is running 3 businesses and often being on call to the general public, it's all very well sectioning time off to attend things you want to do to expand your social networks but it's not always easy being self employed, cost of living nowdays you really appreciate being able to pay your mortgage and feed yourself, and I guess socialising does come as a 2nd priority sadly, where it really should be the one thing you should focus on for your mental health. Catch 22
😅 well at least there are the odd video games conventions and anime conventions. I might try to go to see what the easter serves is like and try to plan going to a music fest. 😅
The biggest problem I've found in today's Dating Market is "Social Media" (Not just Dating Apps )
Women have lost the plot there are no average women anymore ....Everyone is a "10"
Instagram - TikTok - Facebook etc etc have ruined it.
You can meet women at traditional events like Weddings, Church, Workplace, BBQ's Dinner Parties & these women will compare you with the 1,000's of men flattering them & inflating their egos ....Today decent men are being overlooked everyday because Women have no idea of their true "SMV"
Dale (Perth Australia)
I'm not sure I agree - I mean, there are women who have massively inflated sense of self value - but I meet a lot of women who don't suffer with this.. Enough especially that you can still find 'regular women' when you look around.
When was the last time you tried to pick up young girls as a 20 year old dude? 20 years ago? Things changed since then.
You can easily fall into platonic conversation with this strategy that leads no where been doing this this yr btw.
Yes you definitly can - you still need to learn flirting/dating skills, but this can be a good alternative way to meet women while you practice those skills.
I join the Lamborghini, penthouse, motor yacht newsgroup.😁
You seem to omit some key cons to this approach. Namely, that in a lot of hobbies there are not a lot of girls - and even smaller amount of single girls. And if you are forcing yourself to change into a different person, and go to dance classes that you hate instead of a chess club that you like - this is really unhealthy.
Of course, you can try to parry it with "just find an intersection between what you like and what has girls, lol" - but this is still a huge disadvantage that you failed to mention.
If what you like is chess you just have to accept you will have fewer options than a guy who likes hiphop dancing. In that case you are probably better off learning cold approaching.
I'd argue that if the ONLY thing you like is chess club - that you should try to broaden your horizons - I don't mean this to be cruel or glib, but becuase for most of us, living a life that inspires us involves trying new things regularly.. Staying locked in the same life without change is not always good for our mental health.
@@SchoolOfAttraction Of course I try new things regularely - but they are still within the same "niches", and the ones that are out of my niches I don't like when I try. I may try Magic: The Gathering or Warhammer, and I might like it (I'm thinking about giving it a shot now), but I sure as hell would not like dancing or cooking classes.
That's what I'm talking about by "forcing to change for women" - sure, I can work on myself to force myself to like these activities, but that's a REALLY BIG downside that you omitted - and I think that this was just intellectually dishonest to not put it in the video, giving the impression that all social events have the equal opportunity to use "lifeslyle network dating".
this is difficult. the women i like don't seem to attend networking activities. I'm so fukt.
Meetups in los angeles area suck so bad for meeting women in their 30s. The attendance is majority men, and the few women who do show up are just not attractive.
How on earth did you upload this at 5.30 AM?
Australia
Hahaha for some reason I picture you saying this with a cup of coffee in your hand and an exaggerated eye roll "Australia" :P
Best are dance classes.
Yeah, I remember doing some hiphop dance classes in my 20s, and I was the only guy in a class of 20 women.
How can you even dare to mention the saint and holly cold approach...
If your claim would have any substantial basis, evidence of your girlfriends should be everywhere.
I see nothing.
You are bulking again, aren't you, man?
I wish I could say I was :P - I was eating more than I should while I Was doing overseas coaching events and a few other big events that made it hard to have my regular diet, now I'm slowly taking the weight back off.
But I'm still back at gym 5 days a week