An important note with all of her great advice is NONE of this means you should be argumentative, demanding, disrespectful, or cold to men. You can be warm, inviting, kind, and flexible, and STILL maintain your own value, boundaries and interests.
@@h.b.9992 oh my God people always say things like be "inviting" how does someone become "inviting"? I really need someone who will break it down. What to say what to do it
That’s one of the most important things I have learnt recently when I started pondering why I keep attracting losers these days whereas when I was younger I attracted decent guys. At least now I identified the problem and can work on the solution.
@katalinmcewan Right. As we get older, life and society does a number on us mentally, but we gotta remember that no matter what, we are responsible for our own self worth. Positive and loving thoughts for yourself and for others when you see it fits. Good luck!
if you have to think what you are gonna do or say beforehand you are wasting your time with a boy. A real man will tell you he likes you and mean it. period. I am a good person, I dont wanna hurt people. If I like you I mean it, if I dont like you I wont make you believe you have a chance with me. Be careful with all this "instagram quotes", they are sometimes written by those who dont know how to love, all they are looking for is a "like" from the broken ones
It is in the feminine nature to BE, while it is in the masculine nature to DO. I first heard this when I was a teenager studying psychology and I never forgot it 😅 it guided my life 😉
@@heyrachael3785 oh you can. For example my said that if planned ahead he can be free even on weekdays. Like I am supposed to run after him and plan ahead and he would think and say. And MANY things like that
@@heyrachael3785 He'll make you open your wallet on dates. He'll act pissed if you don't sleep with him right away. He won't open doors or pull out chairs for you. He'll stare at other women when he's out with you. He'll just act in ways that make your stomach turn into knots and that take you out of your feminine energy. This is especially true for men who are traditionally attractive or wealthy and have always had women follow them around like puppy dogs. Don't be that woman! Don't accept dates on the weekend if he waited until Thursday to ask you out. Have a life. Insist on being treated like a priority,not an afterthought.
@@thecatnamedTesla Oh so you mean, a woman shouldn’t ask her man when he is free to go out? Like he should be the one to plan dates and show her, he leads and takes the initiative basically? What if you have a boyfriend who doesn’t ever like to go out, not even by himself or with friends? Someone who prefers to stay inside, while you are the opposite. Then it’s hard to have him propose a date on his own no?
I think thats how I lost the person I loved the most because I was doing the opposite and then it looked like I didnt have a life. I dropped everything for him.
i did the same thing. i gave everything and now when he left me, it feels like he took all of me. i realized in a month i have to value and be selfish before trying to take care of someone else. i have to be good on my own instead of trying to see if i can find happiness in a man. i have to make myself happy. im so glad we arent the only ones going and feeling this way!
Omg same 🙈 my nurturing instincts came fullg online and I dropped myself for him. Its so painful that his reaction was to see no value in me and what I was doing for him. Ugh some life lessons were made in hell ...
The guy I did everything for that didn't even bother to emotionally support me once, literally put "king without crown" in his bio... This right here proves that you are 100% right
Valuing yourself is key. When you do, everything else falls into place naturally. Your boundaries are strong, and you treat people how you want to be treated. When you are mentally well, your heart is soft, and your defenses are down. Rooted in self-love and love for the world around you, you become a source of inspiration and guidance through your actions and conversations. In my experience, healing and extending grace to others, recognizing that everyone is at their own level of consciousness, has anchored my life in lasting peace. Extending grace doesn't mean removing your personal boundaries; it allows you not to hold others to your standards. On your healing journey, you understand that if someone falls short, they simply aren’t there yet. Believing in the collective consciousness means understanding that we are all one, each on an individual soul journey. It's our responsibility to inspire through our lives and actions, hoping that our words and deeds plant a seed in others' consciousness, encouraging them to rise.
Ummmmm hmmmm.. I did this with my ex years ago.. chef, $ex, therapist, mommy, maid… I used to think it was just me and then I read women saying the EXACT thing I just said.. anyway I did all that and it wasn’t valued or appreciated and I got 💩 shit on OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN! NEVER AGAIN!
It's all about balance. If you treat yourself with high value and prioritize yourself, everyone else around you sees it automatically. I do that daily. I also recently bought him a birthday gift because I wanted to, not because I cared about his reaction to it, and he broke down crying thanking me profusely and sent me a huge 100 rose bouquet to my work because no one had ever remembered his birthday, cared enough to get him a gift, and his ex refused to celebrate it. So don't do things for him to do them for him, do it if it makes YOU happy. His positive reaction would just be a bonus but it wouldn't be something you need.
Aww. I hope it works out. But don't drop the ball. We're all this confident in the beginning, it's a couple years down the line you that they reveal themselves as the person you met or someone you never knew. This is when we realise that we lost ourselves and trigger easily...Not everyone experiences this but many do.
@@Autodidactz Respectfully, you should be more mindful not to misinterpret situations before speaking. There’s only one person triggered here and it is definitely not this woman. It’s always better to hold one’s tongue, than to look a fool speaking on another’s life. You have no idea what others have been through, never make the mistake of assuming that you do. Not that you are owed an explanation in any way, shape, or form, but I was married to a demonic, narcissistic sociopath for 4 years of mental and physical abusive hell. God brought me out of the pit, healed me, and taught me how to be whole on my own. This man I am dating now years later is a Godly man. We aren’t exclusive and that is MY decision. I am single while I am deciding if I want to be. He completely pursues me. This isn’t the “beginning” for me. The only one that dropped the ball here is you, being totally mistaken on the meaning behind my comment and making assumptions on a stranger’s life. Your complete and total misinterpretation has me baffled. I hope you learn respect ,mindfulness, and interpretational skills to help you refrain from mindlessly speaking on other’s lives with zero background on them. It will also help you decipher tone and meaning in written text to avoid being mistaken. Not very mindful or demure of you there. We all drop the ball at times though, so I’m rooting for you to pick it back up. God bless you lovely. 🤗😉
@@NinaZeffari thank you for repeating what I already stated, I was married to him, not dating. Two very different things. Thank you for also sharing your opinion. I don’t value it, but you are entitled to it. ☺️
@@NinaZeffari and to correct you, I am not afraid. I have the Lord on my side, for whom shall I fear? Nothing and no one. Quite the opposite, I learned how to unapologetically take up space and be myself proudly regardless of who misinterprets it. Other’s ignorance is not my responsibility, it’s on them. I’ll always be the wonderful, whimsical, chosen, anointed, gifted, neurodivergent, blessed, loved, cancer surviving, intentional, intelligent, talented, inimitable bombshell of a woman I am. 😘🙏🏼
Sounds like the wrong man for me. I want a man who's mature enough to appreciate what I do for him. That doesn't mean I'm going to stop taking care of myself or put him above me. I want a balance where I don't go from one extreme to the other. I've been guilty of idolizing before, so I understand what you mean, but I recently learned how to stop idolizing from videos about limerence.
It's not a maturity issue, it's about differences in needs between men and women. The more you do for a man the more you're at risk of mothering him and overgiving, which are both relationship killers for a real masculine man.
@Classic_literature because of hormonal differences between men and women. Men have 14 to 20 times more testosterone in them then woman (which explains huge gaps in behaviors like sexual assaults and crime, but also exploration, adventure, risk taking). What that does is men have different needs than women to be happy. While women crave protection, safety, security (are those are linked to estrogen) men need the chase, to provide for others, to be needed and respected. Mothering a man is emasculinating him, meaning making him feel less than a man, and only (broken) feminine men will want that. Some women do to a man what they NEED themselves from a man, because it actually is his job to provide for us, to be the protector. He's not one more kid we take care of, it will kill the romance and seductive dynamic. I'm a modern woman, financially independent etc but I also think important to recognize physiological and emotional differences no amount of modernity can change.
I don’t know why this was groundbreaking for me… but it was. I tend to be the friend who everyone comes to for advice on men because I understand them so well… but I have never been able to simplify this dynamic I often see in my own current relationship as well as many others where the woman is doing all these amazing things for a guy, yet it appears he “takes it for granted”, and then doesn’t start acting like he really cares until the woman no longer does. This made so much sense of it!
I think it's about striking a balance, which can be incredibly tricky. I did a lot for my ex because one of my love languages is acts of service. However, I overextended myself to the point that he took advantage of my kindness, generosity, and compassion. Like others have said, it's about reciprocity. I lost myself for a while in that relationship because I made myself way too available and didn’t establish and enforce boundaries. Yet, I don't want to be self-involved, cold, and inflexible. Again, it can be such a tricky endeavor.
I did the exact same thing you said and that’s how he took me for granted, didn’t appreciate me anymore and didn’t value me. Well I finally moved on. Lessons learned cause I won’t be doing that again.
It’s exhausting I know. It seems we have to rewire our brains and take the way men think into great consideration and value ourselves, and reel back from so much giving and be given more instead.
This is soooo, so so good. I appreciate that you’re not shaming [us] for doing so much for [him], but simply explain what those deeds and gestures *actually* mean / look like to [him]. I NEEDED this, as I am a recovering codependent who is also just now discovering my husband is a Dismissive Avoidant. (You can imagine what it’s been like all these 14 yrs… It would have been some kind of twisted rollercoaster of a $#!£-show had I not slipped into burnout and depression for half of it. (😩) But thanks to my Lord’s strength and my diligence in therapy, I am on the rise and doing better than EVER. THANK YOU so very much for your invaluable content! 💪🧡
So true. My relationship went from being his dream girl he tried so hard to get, to him being the “prize” and I should feel lucky that he is providing everything for me. To my affection not being worth anything to him as it only serves me, to my self worth being measured by how useful I am in the house.
I rarely get interested in people talking about such topics because it never makes sense, it is almost always rubbish. But wow I must admit this actually makes sense Good job
I agree with this if you are just dating but not in marriage. The intention of why you are doing things for him should shift to doing things for us. Make sure your that is clear that you are a team player and he will see you as a teammate!
Absolutely. Me and my partner who live together, do things for one another all the time. Neither of us is taking advantage of that or putting less value on the other because they do things for us. No, we appreciate each other more.
Can’t make anyone have virtue - valuing and respecting others is based on integrity - that comes from within - however - I can value and respect myself and recognize when someone lacks integrity
I'll take this advice with a grain of salt, someone who is truly yours will never put you down for dropping anything for them. Do it for the one not for thomas from the comment section.
The problem is that some women do lots of things for men because women are showing them how they should behave. That is why a woman do too much for a guy. It is not that he is better or whatever... she is showing how she wanted to be treated
That's the wrong way to show how to be treated. When you do too much before marriage, men get comfortable. That's why some women never get past girlfriend level
The problem is reciprocation, if he’s isn’t giving the same energy then they shouldn’t do that. They should do those things for someone who values it & wants to do same for them
@@designshop7264its called leading by example. I treat everyone with decent respect. But especially man think that I treat them good because i like them more then others. I experienced it a couple of times. Actually its not the womens fault it's a low self esteem and some ppl can't handle to beeing treated nicely.
It’s not either or. Relationships involve giving to the other person and healthy ones are also rooted in self respect. If you don’t give to the other person as part of some mind trick, game thing, you close yourself off from the possibility of having a fulfilling relationship. Goes for either sex
Yep, as per the lyrics of "Great Balls of fire".. (To much love drives a man insane) 😂. Just make sure that your intent is coming from a good place though, because any self respecting man, will only put up with mind games for so long..
that so truee. totally agree.. i already listen any relationship coach feminine masculine energy they also said that. and its make sense. cuz i was already put to much into it and it has nothing for me.
I love you for this, my mother explained it previously and I did not get it as I was mourning the breakup now that I am healing this made perfect sense. Thank you so much.
I am guilty of that. I have been doing that a lot recently. I did it because I really him. But I’m hardly getting anything in return. I would really appreciate if he does anything for me. And of course I want him to value and respects me.
Where were you 20 years ago? I have only just had this epiphany recently when I hit 45 and spent a ton of time (even more so than usual) self-reflecting and taking stock of my life so far. It makes so much sense.
To make him value you, you need to have him do things for you in form of time and money while making him earn your time. Spending his time and money adds value to you, they are purely logical.
An important note with all of her great advice is NONE of this means you should be argumentative, demanding, disrespectful, or cold to men. You can be warm, inviting, kind, and flexible, and STILL maintain your own value, boundaries and interests.
Absolutely 💯
Thank you!!!
But how do i do that?
@@h.b.9992 oh my God people always say things like be "inviting" how does someone become "inviting"? I really need someone who will break it down. What to say what to do it
@@BeenyKay i know, right?! It‘s so frustrating!
It makes sense. You essentially teach people how to treat you based on how you treat yourself.
That’s one of the most important things I have learnt recently when I started pondering why I keep attracting losers these days whereas when I was younger I attracted decent guys. At least now I identified the problem and can work on the solution.
@katalinmcewan Right. As we get older, life and society does a number on us mentally, but we gotta remember that no matter what, we are responsible for our own self worth.
Positive and loving thoughts for yourself and for others when you see it fits. Good luck!
if you have to think what you are gonna do or say beforehand you are wasting your time with a boy. A real man will tell you he likes you and mean it. period. I am a good person, I dont wanna hurt people. If I like you I mean it, if I dont like you I wont make you believe you have a chance with me. Be careful with all this "instagram quotes", they are sometimes written by those who dont know how to love, all they are looking for is a "like" from the broken ones
A man with integrity will not play games i think so better to find someone who dont want to play games all day
Exactly
It is in the feminine nature to BE, while it is in the masculine nature to DO.
I first heard this when I was a teenager studying psychology and I never forgot it 😅 it guided my life 😉
Yup. guys will never drop their plans or hobbies for you. Dont do it for them.
100%
@@xWabbli I never understood statements like this until I was in the thick of it. Now I give the same effort he offers and nothing more
Yep. If the man thinks he's the prize: RUN!
how can you spot this!!
@@heyrachael3785 oh you can. For example my said that if planned ahead he can be free even on weekdays. Like I am supposed to run after him and plan ahead and he would think and say. And MANY things like that
You need to watch the video again, I think you didn’t understand it. Her point goes both ways.
@@heyrachael3785 He'll make you open your wallet on dates. He'll act pissed if you don't sleep with him right away. He won't open doors or pull out chairs for you. He'll stare at other women when he's out with you. He'll just act in ways that make your stomach turn into knots and that take you out of your feminine energy. This is especially true for men who are traditionally attractive or wealthy and have always had women follow them around like puppy dogs. Don't be that woman! Don't accept dates on the weekend if he waited until Thursday to ask you out. Have a life. Insist on being treated like a priority,not an afterthought.
@@thecatnamedTesla Oh so you mean, a woman shouldn’t ask her man when he is free to go out? Like he should be the one to plan dates and show her, he leads and takes the initiative basically? What if you have a boyfriend who doesn’t ever like to go out, not even by himself or with friends? Someone who prefers to stay inside, while you are the opposite. Then it’s hard to have him propose a date on his own no?
Exactly, dont alter ur schedule just to hang out with him.
I'm guilty of this. Trying to change from now on. Need to put myself first and not being desperate.
Speaking as a guy, this is absolutely true.
thanks for giving us an honest comment!
Absolutely. Funny enough no one tells you that until you learn it the hard way and all your life as a woman you'll hear all the sacrifice crap instead
Wish I'd found you years ago. You are a sage.
This is your timing babe so chill and relax ❤❤❤
Most good men wish you never did as this woman spews everything but facts.
Follow this advice and your a new cat lady member in no time at all.
@@pino_de_vogel You just think you're entitled to treat us as only a vagina & a cook----those days are over.
From an older mans perspective I 100% agree
True 💯💯
What's "older"?
@@KathrynBrock1 they have white hair all over
I’d made a promise to myself, that I will always love myself more , than I will love any man !
Men come n go . I won’t
thats hot
Be selfish
@@amandanxala2580Yep it's smart and saves mental and emotional energy
I think thats how I lost the person I loved the most because I was doing the opposite and then it looked like I didnt have a life. I dropped everything for him.
I feel like I’m doing the same thing
My situation right now.
Did that too. He said if you can't be true to me how would you be true to me. Like what?
i did the same thing. i gave everything and now when he left me, it feels like he took all of me. i realized in a month i have to value and be selfish before trying to take care of someone else. i have to be good on my own instead of trying to see if i can find happiness in a man. i have to make myself happy. im so glad we arent the only ones going and feeling this way!
Omg same 🙈 my nurturing instincts came fullg online and I dropped myself for him. Its so painful that his reaction was to see no value in me and what I was doing for him. Ugh some life lessons were made in hell ...
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽💕💕 Girl, where were you when I was in my twenties???
The guy I did everything for that didn't even bother to emotionally support me once, literally put "king without crown" in his bio...
This right here proves that you are 100% right
Ew that's embarrassing for him lol. Glad you got out
hahahah cringe! run!
Valuing yourself is key. When you do, everything else falls into place naturally. Your boundaries are strong, and you treat people how you want to be treated. When you are mentally well, your heart is soft, and your defenses are down. Rooted in self-love and love for the world around you, you become a source of inspiration and guidance through your actions and conversations.
In my experience, healing and extending grace to others, recognizing that everyone is at their own level of consciousness, has anchored my life in lasting peace. Extending grace doesn't mean removing your personal boundaries; it allows you not to hold others to your standards. On your healing journey, you understand that if someone falls short, they simply aren’t there yet. Believing in the collective consciousness means understanding that we are all one, each on an individual soul journey. It's our responsibility to inspire through our lives and actions, hoping that our words and deeds plant a seed in others' consciousness, encouraging them to rise.
Great comment❤ best wishes from Poland!
@@kingagrad3436 thank you beautiful ✨
This is probably best explanation of something that most of us couldn't understand for many years, done in under 60 seconds😮❤
Ummmmm hmmmm.. I did this with my ex years ago.. chef, $ex, therapist, mommy, maid… I used to think it was just me and then I read women saying the EXACT thing I just said.. anyway I did all that and it wasn’t valued or appreciated and I got 💩 shit on OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN! NEVER AGAIN!
Over and over and over ? Why didn’t you leave on the first 💩 if you stayed for more 💩 how can anyone value you?!
❤
Girl same 🤦♀️
Ditto. I’m so done with it.
Omg it's the cat & dog mentalities. "they feed me...I must be a god." vs "they feed me...they must be gods!"
It's all about balance. If you treat yourself with high value and prioritize yourself, everyone else around you sees it automatically. I do that daily.
I also recently bought him a birthday gift because I wanted to, not because I cared about his reaction to it, and he broke down crying thanking me profusely and sent me a huge 100 rose bouquet to my work because no one had ever remembered his birthday, cared enough to get him a gift, and his ex refused to celebrate it. So don't do things for him to do them for him, do it if it makes YOU happy. His positive reaction would just be a bonus but it wouldn't be something you need.
Aww. I hope it works out. But don't drop the ball. We're all this confident in the beginning, it's a couple years down the line you that they reveal themselves as the person you met or someone you never knew. This is when we realise that we lost ourselves and trigger easily...Not everyone experiences this but many do.
@@Autodidactz Respectfully, you should be more mindful not to misinterpret situations before speaking. There’s only one person triggered here and it is definitely not this woman. It’s always better to hold one’s tongue, than to look a fool speaking on another’s life. You have no idea what others have been through, never make the mistake of assuming that you do. Not that you are owed an explanation in any way, shape, or form, but I was married to a demonic, narcissistic sociopath for 4 years of mental and physical abusive hell. God brought me out of the pit, healed me, and taught me how to be whole on my own. This man I am dating now years later is a Godly man. We aren’t exclusive and that is MY decision. I am single while I am deciding if I want to be. He completely pursues me. This isn’t the “beginning” for me. The only one that dropped the ball here is you, being totally mistaken on the meaning behind my comment and making assumptions on a stranger’s life. Your complete and total misinterpretation has me baffled. I hope you learn respect ,mindfulness, and interpretational skills to help you refrain from mindlessly speaking on other’s lives with zero background on them. It will also help you decipher tone and meaning in written text to avoid being mistaken. Not very mindful or demure of you there. We all drop the ball at times though, so I’m rooting for you to pick it back up. God bless you lovely. 🤗😉
@@ArielMarieBee1123 wow you were clearly dating a sociopath cause your response shows how scared and hurt you are. Hope you can heal one day!
@@NinaZeffari thank you for repeating what I already stated, I was married to him, not dating. Two very different things. Thank you for also sharing your opinion. I don’t value it, but you are entitled to it. ☺️
@@NinaZeffari and to correct you, I am not afraid. I have the Lord on my side, for whom shall I fear? Nothing and no one. Quite the opposite, I learned how to unapologetically take up space and be myself proudly regardless of who misinterprets it. Other’s ignorance is not my responsibility, it’s on them. I’ll always be the wonderful, whimsical, chosen, anointed, gifted, neurodivergent, blessed, loved, cancer surviving, intentional, intelligent, talented, inimitable bombshell of a woman I am. 😘🙏🏼
Sounds like the wrong man for me. I want a man who's mature enough to appreciate what I do for him. That doesn't mean I'm going to stop taking care of myself or put him above me. I want a balance where I don't go from one extreme to the other. I've been guilty of idolizing before, so I understand what you mean, but I recently learned how to stop idolizing from videos about limerence.
It's not a maturity issue, it's about differences in needs between men and women. The more you do for a man the more you're at risk of mothering him and overgiving, which are both relationship killers for a real masculine man.
@@GoldChocobo77why are these two killers for masculine men?
@Classic_literature because of hormonal differences between men and women. Men have 14 to 20 times more testosterone in them then woman (which explains huge gaps in behaviors like sexual assaults and crime, but also exploration, adventure, risk taking). What that does is men have different needs than women to be happy. While women crave protection, safety, security (are those are linked to estrogen) men need the chase, to provide for others, to be needed and respected. Mothering a man is emasculinating him, meaning making him feel less than a man, and only (broken) feminine men will want that. Some women do to a man what they NEED themselves from a man, because it actually is his job to provide for us, to be the protector. He's not one more kid we take care of, it will kill the romance and seductive dynamic.
I'm a modern woman, financially independent etc but I also think important to recognize physiological and emotional differences no amount of modernity can change.
I don’t know why this was groundbreaking for me… but it was. I tend to be the friend who everyone comes to for advice on men because I understand them so well… but I have never been able to simplify this dynamic I often see in my own current relationship as well as many others where the woman is doing all these amazing things for a guy, yet it appears he “takes it for granted”, and then doesn’t start acting like he really cares until the woman no longer does. This made so much sense of it!
I think it's about striking a balance, which can be incredibly tricky. I did a lot for my ex because one of my love languages is acts of service. However, I overextended myself to the point that he took advantage of my kindness, generosity, and compassion. Like others have said, it's about reciprocity. I lost myself for a while in that relationship because I made myself way too available and didn’t establish and enforce boundaries. Yet, I don't want to be self-involved, cold, and inflexible. Again, it can be such a tricky endeavor.
I did the exact same thing you said and that’s how he took me for granted, didn’t appreciate me anymore and didn’t value me. Well I finally moved on. Lessons learned cause I won’t be doing that again.
@@Loveandpeace227 And then they end up chasing other females who wind up using THEM. SMDH!
It’s exhausting I know. It seems we have to rewire our brains and take the way men think into great consideration and value ourselves, and reel back from so much giving and be given more instead.
This is soooo, so so good.
I appreciate that you’re not shaming [us] for doing so much for [him], but simply explain what those deeds and gestures *actually* mean / look like to [him].
I NEEDED this, as I am a recovering codependent who is also just now discovering my husband is a Dismissive Avoidant. (You can imagine what it’s been like all these 14 yrs… It would have been some kind of twisted rollercoaster of a $#!£-show had I not slipped into burnout and depression for half of it. (😩) But thanks to my Lord’s strength and my diligence in therapy, I am on the rise and doing better than EVER.
THANK YOU so very much for your invaluable content! 💪🧡
It’s so true and it’s super triggering until you realise you are so important and you deserve to feel loved ❤
So true. My relationship went from being his dream girl he tried so hard to get, to him being the “prize” and I should feel lucky that he is providing everything for me. To my affection not being worth anything to him as it only serves me, to my self worth being measured by how useful I am in the house.
Girl, this just gave me a huge moment of clarity! Thank you!
You have absolutely changed my life with this ONE reel!!
I rarely get interested in people talking about such topics because it never makes sense, it is almost always rubbish. But wow I must admit this actually makes sense
Good job
Oooo-weee! 🎉 some solid insight right there I wish I heard this 8 years ago! ❤
I agree with this if you are just dating but not in marriage. The intention of why you are doing things for him should shift to doing things for us. Make sure your that is clear that you are a team player and he will see you as a teammate!
Absolutely. Me and my partner who live together, do things for one another all the time. Neither of us is taking advantage of that or putting less value on the other because they do things for us. No, we appreciate each other more.
Can’t make anyone have virtue - valuing and respecting others is based on integrity - that comes from within - however - I can value and respect myself and recognize when someone lacks integrity
EXACTLY
I'll take this advice with a grain of salt, someone who is truly yours will never put you down for dropping anything for them. Do it for the one not for thomas from the comment section.
Exactly. They will appreciate the time and energy you give them
The problem is that some women do lots of things for men because women are showing them how they should behave. That is why a woman do too much for a guy. It is not that he is better or whatever... she is showing how she wanted to be treated
That's the wrong way to show how to be treated. When you do too much before marriage, men get comfortable. That's why some women never get past girlfriend level
@@designshop7264no difference between girlfriend and wife. Marriage is simply notifying the government you’re a couple.
Exactly. Don't give him wife privileges if you're not a wife. @@designshop7264
The problem is reciprocation, if he’s isn’t giving the same energy then they shouldn’t do that.
They should do those things for someone who values it & wants to do same for them
@@designshop7264its called leading by example. I treat everyone with decent respect. But especially man think that I treat them good because i like them more then others. I experienced it a couple of times. Actually its not the womens fault it's a low self esteem and some ppl can't handle to beeing treated nicely.
You are the best. Hope you know That. KEEP GIVING PLEASE
Yes we should put ourselves FIRST ❤❤
Oh my my !!!! Its so sooo true !!!!! Grateful for this truely
I Know!..Exactly!..Wat You Mean!..You Jus Confirmed It!!!...ThankU!
Wow never heard it this way.. I’ll never forget these words.. thank you.
Thank you for the utterence! So many NEED to hear this. Bless you ❤
Respect is always earnt & never given
Wooh needed this .. and oh yes I have been putting one on a pedestal 😅 .had dropped gym and every thing.
And then at the end of the day he'd say "You don't even stay fit" do everything you need for yourself girl. Not for any man
This makes so much sense.
And you are my girl crush 😅❤. I value you because you are amazing and I must be amazing since you are creating value/spreading knowledge for us. 🎉❤
Yes, learned this the hard way. Learning to value myself more!
That made perfect sense. Thank you for the reminder.
This was honestly a life changing advice, it explained many things, it is just the perspective i have never thought about
It’s not either or. Relationships involve giving to the other person and healthy ones are also rooted in self respect. If you don’t give to the other person as part of some mind trick, game thing, you close yourself off from the possibility of having a fulfilling relationship. Goes for either sex
This is really true…but u have to realise this on your own..
That's true. Most people learn the hard way
Truth!! Absolute truth
Ladies!! Listen to her! She is talking absolutely facts!🙌
Omg thank you, this just sank into my head... wow
Yep, as per the lyrics of "Great Balls of fire".. (To much love drives a man insane) 😂. Just make sure that your intent is coming from a good place though, because any self respecting man, will only put up with mind games for so long..
This makes so much sense. Looking into real life this is 100% real
AMAZING ADVICE!!👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Perfectly put. And accurate. I learned that the hard way.
Wow! Never looked at it this way!! Thank you ❤
As a woman, I see it the opposite way, if someone values me (in general), I usually see them of high value & amazing.
You explained this thing very very well
that so truee. totally agree.. i already listen any relationship coach feminine masculine energy they also said that. and its make sense. cuz i was already put to much into it and it has nothing for me.
This! 💯💖 i needed to hear this. Perfect timing. 💖
You are my new hero Margarita! Thankyouu so much ❤
I love you for this, my mother explained it previously and I did not get it as I was mourning the breakup now that I am healing this made perfect sense. Thank you so much.
❤ OH MY GOSH,. THANK YOU SO MUCH
Makes sense and it works for me ! I want to do more for myself and less for him just because it makes me happy!
Thank you for being such a wonderful guide for us
Never heard this being explained soooo well. Thank you
I needed this. Thank you love ❤
Wow, eye-opening 😍🥳 That makes so much sense. Thanks! ❤😊
I am guilty of that. I have been doing that a lot recently. I did it because I really him. But I’m hardly getting anything in return. I would really appreciate if he does anything for me. And of course I want him to value and respects me.
Thank you, Ritochka 🙏🏻
Perfectly articulated. As per usuuual ❤
I disagree. Ive done a lot for my man and he appreciated it so much and gave me a lot in return.
Same here ❤
Well put! Thank you sister!!!! 🙏✨💖
Listen to her girls. She made me obsessed already🎉
Your makeup looks so good! Compliments your natural beauty!
Thank you! You are the best ❤
Very strange forward clear advice … love it ❤
I needed this for confirmation thank you
best advice ever
AMEN! AMEN! We are all grateful for your wisdom!
Stellar advice!
Where were you 20 years ago? I have only just had this epiphany recently when I hit 45 and spent a ton of time (even more so than usual) self-reflecting and taking stock of my life so far. It makes so much sense.
Best explanation ever
Never thought of this before ! Wow very logical I will start applying this for sure thank you
Love it needed to hear this honestly ❤
💯 true!!! I hope every single woman really understands and does this. Thanks!
This was the sign I needed so thank you
Thank you for this message❤ Very motivating❤💯
✨️💗Thank you
Wowwww, nice explanation ❤
U are absolutely right
Thank you for that reminder. You have great insight!!
To make him value you, you need to have him do things for you in form of time and money while making him earn your time. Spending his time and money adds value to you, they are purely logical.
I wish I would have heard this message 10 years ago when I started a terrible relationship.
😢
Do for yourself and fit him in when it’s convenient to you. When you have time in your busy schedule. 😀
Love it, and so true ❤❤❤
Makes a lot of sense
Spot on. 🎯
Didn’t know that, much needed advice, thanks!
Thank you for explaining this
Love this, your advice is the best ❤