mad - prayer (demo)

hi guys. my new song "prayer" is finally out on all streaming platforms (links are below)! I wrote this song over 2 years ago during a time when I was struggling severely with my mental health. I was looking through a lot of my old journal entries and prayers that I had written about my mental health, high school, and coping with a lot of the things going on in my life (a lot of the lyrics are taken directly from my journals). I used a lot of my journaling as a way to tell myself that it would be okay eventually, and that's how this song was born. I remember distinctly that I was crying when I had finished writing the song because it was the sign that I needed to continue on and use my music to talk about my message. I always envisioned this as a ballad about my experience during high school, and that's why the song is much more stripped-down as compared to my other songs. I really hope you guys enjoy this song, as it has a super special place in my heart and is one of my favorites that I've written. I love you guys. :)
Stream "Prayer" on Spotify!
Stream "Prayer" on Apple Music!
Tik Tok/Instagram: @madsteaparty
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Prayer (lyrics):
Sometimes I want it all to end
When I really want is a friend
Every night I pray for God to send
For a day where I don’t pretend
I fell down the rabbit hole for too long
‘Cause my mind just wasn’t strong
Stuck in a loop I wept on the noose
And thought that it all was gone
Praying on my knees
Heaven help me, please
I need a sign or thought
That it’s gonna be okay
That it’s gonna be okay
In the hall, I leaned against the wall
Crying till I felt the pain
Wild dreams and silent feelings
Thinking that I’m all to blame
They look at me and see nothing
Though I’m screaming and running
I got lost in my mind
Trying to see when I’m blind
God help me find peace
Praying on my knees
Heaven help me, please
I need a sign or thought
That it’s gonna be okay
That it’s gonna be okay
Oh oh, oh, oh oh, oh (x4)
Praying on my knees
Heaven help me, please
I need a sign or thought
That it’s gonna be okay
That it’s gonna be okay

[@Kacenits]

I first found this song on TikTok, along with "Dear TikTok" and "I Can't Breathe" so I HAD to search you up. Turns out, there's so much more to this song! I'm planning to do a cover for the short version and the other 2 on TikTok so wait until I tag ya :> Anyways, your singing is absolutely amazing! I hope to be a singer someday too

[@pjewelz26]

Follow your dreams!😊

[@zoyaahmed7325]

Your vocals are 🔥🔥🔥

[@oddone194]

I’m just waiting for you and Conan Gray to do a duet, you’d do so good together! Your voice is amazing!

[@pumbaamushu7210]

Did u take it off Spotify it’s not there anymore? 😢

[@zoyaahmed7325]

I missed the premier but like damn this really is a song that needed to be sung 🔥

[@apllehera8750]

going from "that friend" to this .. just really hits it

[@Hoshi-cu7ss]

His music has been so relatable to me, and how i grew up. To anyone put there, please live the life to the fullest and please be kind to others. You never know whay they are going through. I never got to so that and now my life is messed up, but i have surrounded myself with people who care about me and only want whats bwst for me. Now im on my way to singing and dancing in front of a huge croud. Every one stay safe and live life to the fullest 💕❤😊

[@savannahgarcia16]

I missed the premier but i freaking love this song!!! you're talented :')

[@elisavolcic7431]

I'm physically distressed that this isn't on spotify any more >:(

[@charleepalangvanh4923]

WUAT IT WAS ON SPOTIFY🤯🤯🤯🤯😟🙁☹😲😥😨

[@mehlanie13]

what happened to his old songs? do u know why they were taken down?

[@strmybreeze6200]

This is actually so beautiful! You will go places trust me! Never doubt yourself you were born to sing! This song means so much to me! My dream is to be a singer/songwriter you have no idea how much you inspire me! I’ve been down the rabbit hole for a bit and this song just hits differently! It’s so beautifully written

[@kallenwachi2475]

Imma be honest, this song is my most played song on Spotify for 2020. It just sinks into my soul

[@dwight.k.schrute8877]

I miss the good old days

[@huyoquang4845]

Omg the song vibe is really made my day, pretty darker but aesthetic

[@nourah]

How come ur not famous? You really blow my mind and i think that i may have fallin in love with u 🥺❤️❤️

[@arhen4369]

I’m so mad! Why people can hear trash music and ignore completely music like this 😡 this is real music

[@adriabacker2859]

Ikr

[@troydemon7952]

Agree

[@dickmaster_2.0]

bro fr

[@sethcipio288]

This made me shed quite a few tears😭

[@udontknowme7417]

Yess! Keep going please! Your songs and your voice... Beautiful

[@Kai-jq3vw]

I was going through it today and I found this... it makes you feel a little less alone in the struggle. Thank you for being brave and posting your experience.

[@anuragsharma1601]

It's been 2 days since I've found you and I've listened every song by you

[@emersonvasconcelos9843]

Can you make a playlist in your channel with your original songs? I love all them, but it's difficult pass to a other song

[@cocokhranz3553]

This is so amazing, some artists could never

[@anuragsharma1601]

You are just amazing🔥🔥

[@aparna2347]

this is beautiful

[@otispietz9855]

Great job man!

[@user-wy5jd6sk7v]

MASTERPIECE!

[@lindseywichers5312]

This song is so real from the first note

[@lorapetrova2850]

Omg keep going you have an amazing voice💓🌸

[@Slendery]

Damn bro u got a nice voice man!🔥

[@marisa7934]

Your so talented omg

[@SummerGames17]

I love your songs

[@youtubeaccountnumber2686]

This sing is amazing. I love your vocals and you are so talented

[@ezra8001]

fire!!

[@azulmanzanita5400]

Talento hermano,talento que te cargassss!....😉

[@LucasSantos-un5qf]

Put that song on spotify pleaseeee! LOVED IT!❤❤❤😖😖

[@amylakalaka2117]

you have such a beautiful voice. And I hope you can make it as a singer

[@purplelover3718]

I'm your new fan :)

[@BlackOut._.]

Jesus Christ this is amazing 💜🖤💜

[@sillyminie]

60 seconds.... almost there

[@marieb.6680]

Been back here regularly since it's been removed from Spotify

[@sofiawhyte2730]

Same!! He deleted some of my favs of his from Spotify🥲

[@hazivane]

I love him ❤❤

[@buzzy_bee4938]

I would like a playlist of all your songs 😃✨

[@kkqum9072]

SUGOII💞

[@insertswittyusernamehere5040]

ejhkjkffkje i love this and the emotions in this song are so raw why are you so gooood

[@mnm4659]

I love your voice

[@leonardofabiopedrozazuluag1666]

Omg, i'm your fan

[@koenstotijn4053]

please make this song official and available on spot and other music platforms. It is just great (please do this with al your songs, especially this one and world of my own)

[@user-lq4bz5wp7o]

very professional

[@SA-bo7yh]

Just wow ..

[@jaquesouza8376]

beautiful voice

[@maroulacki]

so I found you through Roomie's reaction in his latest video and I can say I'm hooked. good job

[@zainarya8334]

will always and forever be a huge fan of you, Mad 💕 this is fcking gorgeous as usual

[@miles1747]

👏👏👏

[@boogiebear16]

why you do this to me T_T.... dude i love it!

[@manoa2521]

do i listen to this song ok loop every day? yes. am i ashamed? not the slightest 😌

[@hayleydunphy780]

Sometimes I want it all to end
When I really want is a friend
Every night I pray for God to send
For a day where I don’t pretend
I fell down the rabbit hole for too long
‘Cause my mind just wasn’t strong
Stuck in a loop I wept on the noose
And thought that it all was gone
Praying on my knees
Heaven help me, please
I need a sign or thought
That I'm gonna be okay
That I'm gonna be okay
In the hall, I leaned against the wall
Crying till I felt the pain
Wild dreams and silent feelings
Thinking that I’m all to blame
They look at me and see nothing
Though I’m screaming and running
I got lost in my mind
Trying to see while I’m blind
God help me find peace
Praying on my knees
Heaven help me, please
I need a sign or thought
That I'm gonna be okay
That I'm gonna be okay
Oh oh, oh, oh oh, oh
Oh oh, oh, oh oh, oh
Oh oh, oh, oh oh, oh
Oh oh, oh, oh oh, oh
Praying on my knees
Heaven help me, please
I need a sign or thought
That I'm gonna be okay
That I'm gonna be okay

[@hayleydunphy780]

You are welcome :)
This song just hits me different

[@L.B.09]

R these the lyrics to the song in the video?

[@EliazzzZZzz]

@@L.B.09 not yet 😭

[@AlexOrange7528]

Damn your voice is so beautiful! I love your music! 😁 wish I could sing like that 🥲

[@rizkisyahputraofficial]

🌹🌹🌹

[@mung3014]

I am so sad that it's not on Spotify anymore

[@RB-zj9mg]

I'm not crying you are

[@Zed-xl9nv]

Bro I swear there’s something wrong with your platform. You make fucking amazing songs but you’re not blowing up enough. Hope you become more famous one day.

[@kamogelomoletsane2781]

Wow

[@charliehuntington2258]

pls tell me this song is still available its amazing

[@gothic_queer]

Can you make a full version of dear mr anxiety
Btw I love your voice

[@happydays8150]

OMG your pfp! It’s 🔥🔥🔥

[@charliehuntington2258]

i checked everything where can i stream this song tell me plsssss??????

[@JVR-09]

It will always be a ❤ from me

[@azismustofa7647]

I need liric

[@enggoleando]

why is not available on Spotify?

[@gabrielacastro5398]

Please you need to repost this song on Spotify

[@ZFranks]

I need the chords!!!

[@kirazoldyck461]

can't find it on spotify and apple music😭

[@kirazoldyck461]

even "young nights"😭

[@hunna4175]

killt this

[@boyooo2276]

spotify pls 🙏🙏🙏

[@sillyminie]

Bruh at 12am 😭

[@zzzangelzzzd837]

Ik like I have school 😭😭😭

[@claire5061]

hey, it's 2am for me

[@charleepalangvanh4923]

My big sis thinks this song is trash why do people think this song is trash I love this song like sooooooo mudh

[@pky77]

Please post your new song “ace of hearts” on youtube 🥺❤️

[@rileywhatts3002]

God loves you all (:

[@easternwestboy4370]

Where's the guy with the lyrics ?

[@starierisuu]

lol

[@bubbeekun9062]

im from mongolia and I JUST FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU
im a boy ☺😘

[@derenmeng6104]

Damn, you turned me so gay. Love you so much

[@e_luisnieto]

A great song for gender people😭❤️