Regulating Emotions with these 3 key tips!
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- Опубліковано 4 бер 2024
- Dive Deep into Emotional Regulation: Understanding, Struggles, and Solutions
We may hear that we're too emotional by people or think that we are, or perhaps we think we're too needy. Or we may ask ourselves how do I regulate my emotions or be less emotional. Feeling overwhelmed by your emotions? Do you ever struggle to express them healthily, or perhaps suppress them altogether? This video delves into the complexities of emotional regulation, offering valuable insights and practical tools for navigating your inner world.
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Breaking unhealthy patterns workshop: katimorton.com/the-shop/p/yki...
What’s in this video:
Emotional Awareness and Acceptance: Learn mindfulness techniques and emotion identification strategies to truly understand what you're feeling.
Cognitive Strategies: Reimagine limiting beliefs and negative thought patterns through cognitive reappraisal.
Healthy Coping Behaviors: Discover activities like exercise, creative expression, and connection that promote relaxation and well-being.
Bonus: Take the "Emotion Regulation Quiz" to assess your tendencies towards cognitive reappraisal and expressive suppression. Gain valuable insights and understand where to focus your efforts.
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Hello, do you have any videos on maladaptive behaviors and negative feelings people avoid? Thats what I need help with. Im in a mental health court program and need help with this subject.
You are doing a great mission here! People can’t afford therapy and those who can afford it find themselves unable to make appointments. The good therapists are out of pocket $200 a session…like who can afford that?! Healthcare is a disaster at the moment. Thank you for creating this.
"be curious, not judgemental" this should be my yearbook quote
I definitely struggle to regulate my emotions. I avoid them until they become too much, and then it all comes out. I might have learned this from my mom to be honest. She used to pretend she was fine, nothing was wrong, and then I could ask her a question and she would flip on me. Yelling, slamming things. Sometimes this would be unprompted. I'd be in my room, trying to fall asleep, and she would yell at me through the wall and vent all her frustrations. I don't do that, but when I feel those intense emotions of anger and frustration, it causes a deep sense of panic within me. I cry, and cry, and sob. I hyperventilate. Maybe I'm afraid to react the way she does, to treat those around me like they're the problem. I'm aware that it's actually me, and it's something I'm going to struggle with for a while. Sometimes I have to take a step back and see that it's not the people around me, it's me.
Anyway, this is another helpful video, Kati! Now I can address this when I return to therapy in two weeks. I took a break from it, but after yelling at a member of the household and having a massive panic attack, I knew it was time to go back. Definitely need to heal that inner child of mine who wasn't heard, seen, or understood. The girl who wasn't allowed to express herself in any capacity. And by leaving this comment, I only hope it can be of help to someone struggling with this. It's the first time I've actually put all of this into words. Take care!
It’s like a rollercoaster of emotions taking you on a wild ride. Sometimes it’s too much to handle, while other times we push them away. Understanding and figuring out how we regulate our emotions can be a step to finding balance in our lives.
Both- I superficially look like I have no emotions- but it’s because I feel too much. And it’s hard to put a label on all of the competing emotions I feel.
I’m known as the nicest most chill person- right up until I’m not…😞🤦🏽♀️
Btw- Kati you are wonderful- and your eyebrows are perfection! Beautiful inside and out 😊
This is what I have been struggling all my life with, having had no role models of healthy emotional regulation, and zero guidance. Even as an adult, now, I still have to figure it all out on my own, plus having to manage my parents and their lack of emotional regulation as they get old and frail.
same here
7 lol. Hi, I have Depression, Anxiety, PTSD, Autism, and ADHD. Especially when I’m overstimulated, in pain (which is often due to chronic conditions), or overwhelmed, I cannot seem to regulate my emotions, at all. I have my MSW, I have a ton of tools in my toolbox, but when I’m in a heightened state of emotion, I can’t seem to access any of my coping skills. I feel like “I deserve to feel this way, so I’m not going to try to feel better” or “nothing is going to work, so why try?”. My rational brain knows this isn’t true, but when I’m depressed, having a meltdown or panic attack, I feel like I can’t access my rational brain. My wonderfully supportive fiancé tries his best; he’ll say things like “why don’t we take some deep breaths and look at 5 things we can see”. And I just cry “no, it’s not going to help”. I literally can’t calm down until I fall asleep.
But I’m also extremely emotionally intelligent. I over analyze my emotions, to a fault. I try to figure out what triggered these emotions and how I can control my feelings, to no avail. It sucks being so incredibly knowledgeable about my emotions, but not feel like I can control them.
My emotional instability is the bane of my existence. It's like I am truly my own worst enemy
Through emotional regulation I learned to accept the emotions not judge the response and ride out the waves
This is something that I work on daily, being in therapy for C-PTSD, but learning to control and regulate emotions is probably something that most people need to work on to some extent, for whatever reason.
In my case it's not having learned coping skills in childhood and using mainly dissociation as a way of not feeling intense emotions related to trauma.
I’m starting therapy tomorrow and this give me a good start point thank you
thank you for providing all of these resources for free❤️
I’m diagnosed “Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder”... so can relate to alot of what you’re saying in this video 🙏🏻
I'm diagnosed with CPTSD and it's helped me get way more understanding and validation than any other psychological label... Quitting the rollercoaster of pathologizing myself has really helped because it has given me the confidence to speak to my experience rather than fighting the stereotypes I get from having a diagnosis like BPD etc
How would something like this work, if say the person was Autistic and has Alexithymia? Not knowing how you're feeling makes it hard to regulate what you don't cognitively understand.
Thank you, Kati, for this channel. I've truly benefited from many of the topics you've brought up & explained. I explore the issues on my own or w my counselor. It's brought greater understanding & coping. I'm grateful ❤
Sometimes, I can be a very emotional person. When I'm mad, I get a little angry. When I'm sad, I'm flooded with shame, hurt and doubt. When I'm happy, I'm usually satisfied and *really* happy. Overall, I try to keep my emotions on check.
I've recently started getting into my fear of some emotions in therapy and this video is s perfectly timed.
I had an emotional abusive mother who struggled with emotional regulation and I grew up being afraid of her negative out bursts which then manifested in a fear of my own anger. So i just end up bottling must of it up. So right now im really grateful for this video
I really needed this today.
Timely topic as usual
Ok, saving this for my BPD and mental health list. My therapist will love this video! Thanks for analysing this topic Kati. ❤
There’s SO much good information in this video! Thanks @KatiMorton 😊
I think I’ll rewatch this and take NOTES!
thank you for this video...
Thanks!
Thank you so much.
0:01 - Love is Blind as an example; what emotion-regulation is NOT
1:08 - Three common types of poor emotion-regulation
2:12 - What is emotion regulation? Why is it important?
3:00 - Why is it difficult to regulate emotions? What does that look like?
6:05 - What are maladaptive emotion regulation strategies? Why do we use them?
9:08 - How can we better understand emotion regulation?
13:27 - Emotional Regulation Quiz (ERQ)
17:35 - Quiz results, other resources from Kati, and conclusion
I wanted to say that if you're struggling with making emotion regulation techniques stick, that can sometimes be attributed to beliefs and myths about emotions in general. These often arise from childhood, trauma, or other adverse scenarios, or they're simply ingrained via societal norms.
Remember that having great emotion regulation isn't actually the norm, unfortunately. If you struggle with it, that makes you "average" lol. But it certainly makes it harder for us and others to live, so it's worth improving!
Brilliant explanation!!....🙏🙏
Love your channel, it's a great added resource to therapy
I Love the Interactive feature of the Video, super cool! As well as the woven character examples on recent videos, :)
Thank you for this video, very helpful for counseling students especially. Thanks! :)
I have not felt any significant emotion in many years. It seems most emotions are stimulated by humans. I have no humans in my life. Thus, I experience very little emotion. I regard this a positive, in my life.
Then I hope you have some animals or pets in your life. Then you will feel a genuine connection with another sentient being. I like/love animals so much more than people.
Very interesting and useful, thanks!
I think avoiding situations where you’re going to be upset or triggered is a wonderful coping mechanism. Why put yourself in a situation that’s going to upset you? There are 9 billion people in this world and I’m going to hang with the ones that are kind and supportive. I choose to spend my time with people that bring me joy. Avoiding unsafe, toxic people sounds like a mature way of protecting yourself this is just my opinion I’m not trying to be a jerk.
It can be but it prevents you from getting tools to deal with situations like that. Not all situations are avoidable, particularly when interacting with people you care about. It's also pretty cowardly.
very lonely existing but maybe better than being on a roller coaster daily
Wonderful analogy of this is the nursery rhyme of the: Three Little Pigs and their homes getting a solid base for living style. Or learning about theses changes. (Coping styles, change the experience, acceptance). Nice tape.
This made me think. And answered a few questions. Very informative video. 👍
The feelings wheel is interesting. I just looked at it and it made me realize that I feel a lot more negative emotion than I thought, and it also helped me to identify the underlying emotions. Definitely a good tool.
Well yea ... i mean we can all control our feelings if we choose .... but they're inevitable. Personally i don't think there is any avoiding emotions altogether , however i do believe there is a time and a place to express certain emotions.
I’m so the person that’s on a roller coaster of repression and then explosion. I was diagnosed bipolar in the 90’s. I now believe it’s CPTSD with autism and adhd. Learning emotional regulation has improved my life so very much!
Your so helpful
Aww I try to be :) I am so glad you feel that way!! xoxo
I used to overreact a lot. I used to explode, or get overwhelmed about things when they weren’t a big deal. Now, I bottle up my emotions, and basically invalidate myself. I also use healthy coping skills, but I expect them to shut the emotion off for good! I’m not very kind to myself when I show emotions. I get very mad at myself when I show emotions, and even have wanted to slap myself for showing emotions. I have stopped doubting myself. I really need to work on not limiting myself, not restricting myself, and being more kind and loving to myself. I’ve missed out so much on validation and understanding, that I now ask permission from others if it’s OK, that I do certain things. I ask them if I am allowed to do them. Because I really don’t allow myself to do them. I think me having a hard time regulating. My emotions is due to having complex PTSD, being on the autism spectrum, and may be because of being totally blind.
I can't regulate my anger but also suppress crying... and I am not irate that positive emotions are also suppressed 😐 God I hate being an emotional human being...
If I feel hurt sad or even emotion that hurts in some way I became a where angry and snape to people around me because I don't know how to show my emotions because I wasn't allowed to when I was growing up but I did learn how to show emotions a little because I did see a therapist because I have a daughter and don't want her to learn that showing emotions is wrong
Thank you for your content. You're truly amazing 🫶✨
G'day Kati. Such a great video. I will have to watch it again, just to take it all in. I wonder what you think about HSPs , highly sensitive people. I presume you are familiar with the book by Elaine Aaron on this subject. I have cPTSD and I also think I am an HSP. I have a lot of difficulty in regulating my emotions. My therapist is helping me to identify what my emotions are. But I still can't "regulate" them.
Identifying my triggers, breathing 4 4 4 and to talk to myself until I come down, helps for me. Loneliness is my trigger, but am I really lonely or just alone?
This isnt related but I was wondering if anyone experienced this before: Why is that when we are depressed or anxious, and we know the coping skills to help, we don’t do any of them. I’m experiencing this. I’m reminded of my coping skills, and I just don’t want to do any of them! What is this??
I have agitation and anxiety. I panic when under certain stress and change in daily habits and or worry to the point of panic. I do then become ok again. I think my GP is sick of hearing from me because I’m wondering if I have ADHD or something more. I also around every 4 months go through a cycle whereby I’ll cancel and close all social media accounts only to restart them up again. And I do struggle with the decision making but not every day and not bills etc. 😢
I know other people see this in me and I just sometimes want this not to be something I have to deal with. It’s incredibly difficult especially when in an emotional bind /panic mode.
I DEFINITELY circulate. I repress any negative emotions until I just explode…then it scares me and others and I repress again…
I 100% relate to the list you posted…it’s tough. I try hard not to reach out a lot, then that ended up in a 24 year struggle with SH and 15 year struggle with ED…
In my family some people have married the idea that “they are an emotional person”
So much so that when I tried to share DBT emotion management techniques, my sister in law exploded angrily at me because she misunderstood one detail and became a little human bomb for no reason
She is the worst
Ugh that can be so hard.. and having such reactive people around us can make it feel like we are walking on eggshells :( xoxo I am so sorry.
@@Katimorton Thanks Katie! Even though it can be that way at moments, I have developed my own strategies and skills that help me cope in my household 💟💪
can you do a video talking about sickle cell and how it effect a person on a mental level I have sickle cell and I know it gives pain and etc but I do hope you do a video on it there more to it but i feel like my parents don't take it fully seriously
I will have to look into sickle cell because I don't know much about it or how it affects our mental health. xoxo
@@Katimorton thank you so much i been afraid to speak out loud I have more issues but I'm not ready to say more
🧡💗🧡
What about uncontrollable emotions like anxiety about real and current and unavoidable issues? I’m constant terrified of the US election, which is a threat to the world? Or climate change? Or political oppression? The way I cope is isolation and emotional suppression.
I understand as I have always struggled with this. There's no fixing this mess. We're just going to have to adapt and help others along the way.
Mostly, what I have learned is to separate the things that I can control from those that I cannot. I've also learned that all the worrying in the world serves no purpose unless it moves me to take action on things that I CAN control to allow me to continue to adapt, exist and function and a rapidly-changing world. This is what keeps me from feeling completely helpless.
@@Mossy-Rock I have no ability to separate what I can and can’t control. I think the reason is that would still need to react to things I can’t control.
@@Mossy-Rock I don't understand how people can separate the things that they can control from things they can't. I have no choice over my anxieties based on whether or not they have a purpose, any more than I have a choice over my phobias. I don't adapt well at all, and I do feel totally helpless in the face of overwhelming events. I feel I'm barely surviving.
@@sjzaraThank you for explaining. Counseling/therapy is a logical choice here.
Hey, wish I could chime in with some ideas, as I'm struggling with anxiety derived from those same issues, but I still haven't found anything that could help. Just wanting to let you know that you are not alone and I understand you
How can one be 'too' emotional?
I scored 12 on both. I’m I good then?😅
err.... 6 and 28 ..... houston we ha....sigh.
IS THERE?- already- a video i can watch about..... I have a YOUNGER sibling. Career-wise and Financially, they are doing MUCH better in life than I am, even though I work, too. They are far better off, so I dont understand any need to...compete? But i feel like whenever they visit (about twice a year), i feel as if they always try to "dominate" and "run everything" and set the days Agenda. It gets worse. Picture this:
In YOUR personal Life, isnt it reasonable, and dont YOU get to "be in charge" IF--
its 1. IN your House ("Your House, your rules)
2. ON your property and also
3. IN your car that you own. Isnt everyone in charge in those 3 places?
In my car, ALWAYS, I play some Music i like, whether its 4 blocks to the grocery store, or a Road Trip, 5hrs one way. My Sibling LITERALLY wont ride in my car AT ALL, cuz there would be music. Not screaming loud, just on. and like a wide variety of genres. Doesnt matter. he hates them all.
My car, my rules. No one held a gun to their head, but if they CHOOSE to ride with me, i dont need their permission in-my-own-Car. and then they try to guilt me:
I could show more "Consideration". Excuse me?
What do iiiiii do, whenever iiii'm in anyone else's car? Do I tell the driver to turn the ,music off? NO! Why dont i? because--
iiiii'm having "consideration" knowing-- its THEIR CAR, Likewise, others can have the same consideration for me. but oohhh nnooo, we cant have that. God forbid we would AVOID double-standards and have any equal rights or "whatever's Fair". Nope. I'm expected to cave-in and "keep the peace". ( more like a doormat).
But i have held firm. if i dont, it wouldnt be long, before there'd appear 4 other situations for me to also be more "considerate" in. But he doesnt "Bend" for me.
We are LITERALLY driving, (he's driving all of us, in our Parents car, never mine, not for 6 blocks (the car is also clean and runs good. Mine)....again, why is this such a thing with him? He's already got a better house, better car, higher paying job...why does he have to tell me what I can and cant do in my own Car? Is there already any video I should watch about this? I guess the question is: why would the one who's already doing so much better in Life still have to try and DOMINATE? Thanks for reading this. You are doing a great work with your videos. I have enjoyed, and benefitted from, many. :)
Any traits of NPD !?
@@MrEpsilonZerothem? Or did you meañ me? your account was created in 2011 and still have only 5 followers. Can anyone offer more informative help?
@@MrEpsilonZeroDo you mean NPD with them? or me?
It says your account was started back in 2011, and you still only have 5 followers. (More)...
Is there a video I can watch about a younger sibling being a Narcissist, and why they might be one? Anybody? thanks.
Love is a lie
What is love
@@audreymay9378 baby dont hurt me. Dont hurt me no more.
@audreymay9378 Baby, don't hurt me. Don't hurt me. Don't hurt me no more.
@@uniquerebeljaney3639
😁
Listen I like your videos and see each one of them.
But sometimes your questions are not easy to answer.
And sometimes I just don't know what to say.
The answer could be very extense.
That's all
Bye.