stop faking it until you make it. be confident NOW.

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  • Опубліковано 17 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 155

  • @joyeeyang3554
    @joyeeyang3554 Рік тому +151

    "Is it ok to love myself around other people?" I felt that

  • @carlapastor6845
    @carlapastor6845 Рік тому +72

    1. Stop caring about what other people think about you!
    2. Don't put people on a pedestal!
    3. Release your attachment out of people
    4. Remind yourself your worth and practice gratitude for what you have.
    5. Do shadow work of your insecurities and the things that you don't like about yourself. Reflect about them, why don't you like them?

  • @inmy20_s
    @inmy20_s Рік тому +69

    U r the real example of "women supporting women " 💞 u go girl 😍😘

  • @hayatfarid4897
    @hayatfarid4897 Рік тому +96

    Elicia , maybe it's a coincidence I'm able to post this early enough for you to see , maybe it's not. Either way I'm grateful it gives me an opportunity to tell you how much your videos help me . From one girl to another , you really have saved so many of us. I've been so depressed for months and the only thing keeping me going is your videos. Simply because you inspire me to live . You inspire power inside me I didnt think I had. Your videos keep giving me the little push I need to keep going...thank you so much Angel❤

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому +37

      This is so beautiful.. I can’t believe I’ve been such a huge impact on your life like this.. it truly melts my heart 🥹 I appreciate you sosososo much and I’m honestly so proud of you for pushing through, even when days can feel SO HARD 🥹🥰 I’m so happy that you’re here in my community with us all 💗

    • @mikepiccolo32
      @mikepiccolo32 Рік тому

      ​@@eliciagoguen are you cool? Are you going to Aerosmiths final tour ?

    • @Yepsaiditandwhat
      @Yepsaiditandwhat Рік тому

      Same Hayat thank you EG!

  • @ceciadovana5971
    @ceciadovana5971 Рік тому +17

    one thing that's really helped me with my confidence was to stop judging others. It then kind of transfered into not judging myself. Because if I don't judge others, why would I judge myself for the same things?
    Idk, it may be an obvious thing, but it just kind of evolved for me that way over the years

  • @camrynmariestrahm
    @camrynmariestrahm Рік тому +29

    girl you are literally free therapy LMAO i feel like just had an hour long session and i am so hype now…it’s 11pm and i just had my room repainted, making another vision board to go on my new walls for this summer. thanks for all your work you put in to your channel. i love you fellow scorpio girl

  • @remember_roses
    @remember_roses Рік тому +22

    My philosophy on self confidence really shifted when I read the book by Jordan Peterson and learned that self confidence is about building trust in yourself through making and keeping promises to yourself (Mel Robbins and Ed Mylette teach the same concept) . I just wake up everyday and do what I say I will do. Period. Before that, I used to think that confidence has to do with the way we look or achievements (which can be, but it's the type of confidence that can be taken away from you any second because it is dependent on outside factors)

    • @yousrazerr531
      @yousrazerr531 Рік тому +1

      Can you give me the name of the book ?!

    • @GetElevatedWithMe
      @GetElevatedWithMe Рік тому +2

      I love this so so much thank you for sharing!

    • @shawntelchinn84
      @shawntelchinn84 Рік тому +2

      That is great advice on how I need to go about building my confidence. I think it further explains what Elicia was trying to say about balance and accomplishments! And also what is the name of the book you read??❤

  • @kesuno
    @kesuno Рік тому +3

    "you *dont need* other people to tell you that you are worthy, that you are valuable, that you are beautiful, that you are amazing"
    i love that

  • @TheBeautyMage
    @TheBeautyMage Рік тому +5

    All this is so real. I watched every moment glued!!! I literally was all about this guy... like more than a crush... was praying for this person and everything... Even crying over things about him. He was saying super beautiful stuff and then he would ghost me. So, I released my care after some prayer and let him go... became indifferent to if he liked me. Now he is writing me if I want to go out. But, now I'm over it and don't want to anymore. Yes, girl... they will want you when you don't want them.

  • @NYKIRA
    @NYKIRA Рік тому +15

    I am so glad you said the word practice! Confidence is like a flower that you have to water & protect. There's going to be trials that insight fear yet when you take a moment to feel that fear and push through it your confidence grows 🙌🏾🩷

  • @gabbyygirl
    @gabbyygirl Рік тому +2

    WOW this is the best video i’ve seen on confidence. It actually made it approachable and was better than, “you’re amazing! stop being insecure!” this is very realistic!

  • @Sugar735
    @Sugar735 Рік тому +9

    One thing that helps me is to think, say I'm feeling fat, ok, so is someone actually going to come up to me and say to my face "wow you're fat"? Probably not. And if they do?? That's really fucking weird of them, they're the problem, not my body. And remind myself that at 34, literally not a single person in my real life has come up to me and told me I'm ugly/worthless/fat/stupid/etc. Literally hasn't happened since highschool. Who cares??? And if someone does laugh at me??? Cool, I spread some joy today. You're welcome.
    ...or at least I try to remember those things.

  • @MarieM-ui4bu
    @MarieM-ui4bu Рік тому +6

    Thank you!! Accepting all of the flaws in your body is sooo painful, especially when there's a straight link to not being worthy of love because of these flaws...

  • @thesubliminalqueen
    @thesubliminalqueen Рік тому +12

    I really love your 30+ min long videos!

  • @Sandyficslick
    @Sandyficslick Рік тому +6

    Gosh! I missed that intro!! YAY!!! And yes!! Glad to see there are many of us who are bothered by this "Fake it till you make it" mindset cause whenever someone told me that when im lacking confidence or not accepting myself I wondered why must I lie to myself? why cant i just accept my current state and start from there? why cant we do it like that? So relieved to know you feel the same Elicia. Its very reassuring to hear all this from you. And all your tips are very realistic and sensible. Thank you once again!!

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому +3

      Yessss I’m really happy I’m not the only one… I hear all the time about this, “fake it till you make it thing” but it never really made sense to me so I’m glad we’re feeling the same ❤️ I appreciate you so much and thank you for acknowledging the intro 🤭😍❤️

  • @loreslight2685
    @loreslight2685 Рік тому +13

    Thank you queen!!!! EVERYTHING resonated ♥️ thank you! This one is worth listening to MULTIPLE times to let’s it all sink in, process and become automatic. Besitos!!! 😘

  • @micariobo1078
    @micariobo1078 Рік тому +7

    summer suits you really well, thanks for being constant with your videos, we appreciate so much❤️

  • @kseniaburyukhaeva6019
    @kseniaburyukhaeva6019 Рік тому +2

    thank you for this video!! all resonated, literally just listening to your words and affirmations im alrEADY starting to feel like yes im the one whose opinion matters, im the one to choose whether im confident or whether my mental state and confidence depend on other people. nah, we don't need that. we're gonna practice starting by lil steps and then just glow up! love you

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому +1

      YESSSS I’m so proud of you for reminding yourself of this mindset 😍

  • @xaxaxaxa9374
    @xaxaxaxa9374 Рік тому +4

    Hahah yeah I needed it, I am more confident month by month, I am getting back my old self-worth but today I had beef with my parents because i wore croptop, and they were commenting my look and they were making me upset so I started doubt my self. I am just like omg mom just stop it, because when I am backing to home I just want to spend time together with you.
    It’s sad when my closest people making me upset, like who cares about your look, I am hurting somebody?XD
    Thanks Alicia, you are a wonderful women

  • @sabrina_jane
    @sabrina_jane Рік тому

    I'm still on the journey towards healthy self-esteem and what is helping me the most is realizing I don't need permission to love and accept myself. If I continue putting everyone else on a pedestal and allow their thoughts, opinions, and feelings towards me to determine how I should feel and treat myself, I'm going to live a terrible life. Other people are unreliable, imperfect, and unaware so I should never let their standards hold me back from fully embracing who I am. We're all human, no one is better than anyone else, so I should be free to value and love myself.

  • @graceh9478
    @graceh9478 Рік тому

    Definitely saving this for later. I know I’ll have to go back and listen to this

  • @inglespasoapasoconlucie
    @inglespasoapasoconlucie Рік тому +3

    THANK YOU for this!!!!! ❤

  • @mariyaawad5007
    @mariyaawad5007 Рік тому +3

    🎉can I just say that ur consistency with posting is unmatched on the UA-cam space, definitely my favorite UA-camr of 2023. 🤩

  • @zingzong3
    @zingzong3 Рік тому +2

    Hi Elicia, I found your UA-cam channel about 2 months ago, I feel like every video you put out resonates with me. Each piece of content is such a great help. Maybe it's also the fact that I'm métisse, with curly hair but I recognize myself so much in what you say. Some of your phrases have literally allowed me to set up healthy routines, and to have an increasingly healthy relationship with myself. Thanks to you and your gift of sharing your knowledge with others.
    THANK YOU for what you do, it literally helps thousands of people 💕

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому +1

      This is so powerful babe!! I love that you’re able to resonate so deeply with me in my content, I’m so incredibly blessed to have you as a part of my community 🥹🥰

  • @natalien5752
    @natalien5752 Рік тому

    Thank youuu soooo much for this video!! ❤ Really up in time when I needed to hear that! So valuable🥰
    Everything is in ourselves, that's true, and the key point is that we are not perfect, and don't have to be to love ourselves.

  • @jbreezy519
    @jbreezy519 Рік тому

    I’m gone be honest, this is better than my therapist!

  • @bishachaturvedi1228
    @bishachaturvedi1228 Рік тому +4

    I'm so grateful for you and your channel!!!💓💓💓💓

  • @pinksalamanders
    @pinksalamanders Рік тому +1

    omg, I literally have been talking about your channel to others and sharing your videos, watching them heavy and I STILL didn't even notice I wasn't subbed. So don't ever think you shouldn't mention it. 😭😭

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому

      Hahaha I’m so glad you’re subbed now 🥹 thank you so much for sharing 🥰

  • @AnalessaPenton
    @AnalessaPenton Рік тому +1

    Thank you for your content man, ur out here changing lives for real!

  • @Wattalady
    @Wattalady Рік тому

    I'm 16 about to be 17 and I've been watching your channel and it has definitely helped me get over some trama and be confident in myself. So I definitely appreciate you making thease videos😌🙏🏾

  • @BLACKGIRLFINANCE
    @BLACKGIRLFINANCE Рік тому

    Practice being confident, it's like a muscle! Love this.❤❤❤ 🇨🇦

  • @simrankj
    @simrankj Рік тому +1

    What time yet again - I was listening to another podcast the other day where she was like fake it till you make it - I was thinking this doesn't sit right with me I don't like the term 'fake it' and I started to think maybe I'm overthinking or I'm wrong for believing that then you released this video✨️thank you girlll💗

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому +1

      If that isn’t alignment, idk what is 💅🏽☺️

  • @Angeee119
    @Angeee119 Рік тому

    As someone who was actually on their deathbed from a heart tumor at 17, i always tell people not once, not one single time did i think about what ANYONE thought of me.
    When it comes down to it, it REALLY does not matter, and I can fully attest to that.
    Somehow, life got in my head after years and years, and im working very hard to refind myself and my confidence, that same mindset, after a really crap relationship with a narcissist. And choosing a horrible "best friend". 😞
    But I've recently learned that my traumas led to those choices, and your videos are a great help girl!

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому

      Wow, I’m deeply proud of you ❤️ I hope you’ve been well 💓

    • @Angeee119
      @Angeee119 Рік тому

      ​@@eliciagoguen Thank you, girl! 🩵💙
      Im getting there! Lot of work to do, but i feeeeel the changes, instead of going through the motions...
      But finding your channel, REALLY has helped me so much, you're the one "good" voice in my life. The only person to be honest, that is saying something quality or helpful, self bettering, healing.
      I'll make new, real, healthy friends, that arent bad people, but im not ready yet.
      Being surrounded by nothing but negativity, and unhealed people being terrible people, even your family, fuck.. it really gets to you after years...
      So, as many times as i can say it, THANK YOU for being here💙

  • @GetElevatedWithMe
    @GetElevatedWithMe Рік тому

    Rewatching because I need this message again! Thank you my beautiful friend ❤❤❤ inside and out.

  • @THECHANGINGPODCAST
    @THECHANGINGPODCAST Рік тому

    I thought I was confident until I see Elicia tell me this. I understand that in reality I'm afraid, every time I go out, to receive offence or hurting opinion on myself from others. Probably because I think them first by myself

  • @fleurescent6609
    @fleurescent6609 Рік тому +1

    thank you so much for posting!! loved this vid ❤❤❤

  • @shawntelchinn84
    @shawntelchinn84 Рік тому

    Elicia, Please SEE THIS COMMENT!!❤ This video is so right on time for me in this moment. I just changed jobs and I found myself going from I validate myself to I need so badly for my new coworkers to accept me. I don’t even know why the change happened. Lately though, I have been feeling kinda of lonely and craving a sense of community in my work place, but I started veering towards anxious attachment to my colleagues. And the thing is that we are bus drivers so the job can feel lonely as far as coworkers because we technically work alone until we’re in the lunchroom. Anyway, you’re correct about detaching because when I first got the job I was detached because I didn’t know anyone and people were drawing towards me and wanted to know me. But then when I started getting approval I forgot how to be detached and started acting like I needed their approval and it pushed people away. So yeah I will go back in on Monday, detached and just being myself no matter what people think of me. Thank you. ❤

    • @shawntelchinn84
      @shawntelchinn84 Рік тому

      Also my confidence can go up and down from day to day because I have my front teeth missing and I am not wearing dentures. I’m only 38 years old and I feel like losing my teeth is very difficult and challenging especially when it comes to staying confident and detached. Honestly the struggle has been there even before I lost my front teeth to periodontal disease. But that is why I am always thanking you because you being there for people like me is sooooooo needed in this hard world!!! And I’m 38 and I’m just now learning how to heal myself.

  • @girlygirlez5842
    @girlygirlez5842 Рік тому

    Thank you for answering my comment . You are amazing !!Amazing video ,thank you ❤

  • @meaganbonany
    @meaganbonany Рік тому

    I needed to hear this! Thanks for sharing beautiful!

  • @thediariesofchi
    @thediariesofchi Рік тому

    I relate to what you said ab dancing 😭 literally same

  • @anaaq
    @anaaq Рік тому

    Thank you so much for this !! I really needed this 💗💗

  • @jhuenegale
    @jhuenegale Рік тому

    Your energy. You're so powerful Elicia! Your videos truly move me, my Saturday mornings are always committed to watching your new videos... You're changing everything for me... forever grateful seriously THANK YOU ❤

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому +1

      I love you so much thank you 🥹🥰

  • @eliciagoguen
    @eliciagoguen  Рік тому +5

    Next week on my podcast I’ll be continuing this conversation of being confident and I have something special to announce as well so stay tuned girlieeessss ❤ ua-cam.com/video/DK2XZXC_s30/v-deo.html

  • @lexibee6043
    @lexibee6043 Рік тому

    I needed this thank you! ❤

  • @shelbytaylor4605
    @shelbytaylor4605 Рік тому

    Thank you for another amazing video!!

  • @OpenYourMindDiana
    @OpenYourMindDiana Рік тому

    Thank you so much 🙏🏼

  • @jalaberga
    @jalaberga Рік тому +1

    Elicia you forgot to say bc it’s a good time over here 🥺🥺 it is always a good time bruh 🥺

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому +1

      LOL OMGGGG WHY AM I LIKE THIS 😭😭

  • @rashmiarya6635
    @rashmiarya6635 Рік тому

    Thankyou so much helps a lotttt❤❤❤

  • @ShaydenReyna
    @ShaydenReyna Рік тому

    This videos have changed my life for the better. ❤

  • @jeannecadon3531
    @jeannecadon3531 Рік тому +1

    Just went back to my parents' place for the summer and I absolutely needed that in this though period... Thank you!+

  • @shaniyadunchie
    @shaniyadunchie Рік тому

    Wow! I didn't even know I needed this ❤ Thank you

  • @Dreamer-ss8wz
    @Dreamer-ss8wz Рік тому

    Everyone tells you fake it till you make it but no one tells you how
    And exactly what she did❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @generic707
    @generic707 Рік тому +2

    She. does. not. miss.

  • @GetElevatedWithMe
    @GetElevatedWithMe Рік тому

    Also I’ve most likely said it but I’ll say it again 😂your vibrations are so strong and beautiful that I get tingles when you speak. Usually that’s the universe telling me I’m on the right path and I better pay attention. Ok back to watching lol.

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому +1

      Omg this makes me SO HAPPY 😭😭

    • @GetElevatedWithMe
      @GetElevatedWithMe Рік тому

      @@eliciagoguen good honey!! Just know that I see you and I see your true inner beauty. The exterior is absolutely gorgeous as well but girl that inner beauty is radiating goddess 💕

  • @victoriafiend
    @victoriafiend Рік тому

    girll love your videos

  • @jessthomas580
    @jessthomas580 Рік тому +2

    The reminder I knew I needed but didn't appreciate until now!!!! Thank you, I love you! We're all in this together.

  • @juniorchavesopicassodeyahu988
    @juniorchavesopicassodeyahu988 Рік тому +2

    You are look gorgeous as always

  • @twylalove8857
    @twylalove8857 Рік тому

    So good!!💓💕

  • @gaylealvrz
    @gaylealvrz Рік тому

    I LOVE YOU SO DAMN MUCH

  • @christinebona_
    @christinebona_ Рік тому

    Thank you for the encouraging words ❤❤❤

  • @xoxo_stacyg
    @xoxo_stacyg Рік тому

    Thank you for this video ❤

  • @kearamaldonado
    @kearamaldonado Рік тому

    I LOVE ur videos!!!!

  • @maghmagh5261
    @maghmagh5261 Рік тому

    Aliciaaaaa ❤❤ i do loooove your videos ... i take my daily dose of motivation from your channel (you dont know really how much of an impact your making in our lives so thank you from the bottom of my heart.)

  • @sophiaisabelle027
    @sophiaisabelle027 Рік тому

    Thanks for this video. We hope to see more insight from you.

  • @Billy33753
    @Billy33753 Рік тому

    Thanks for sharing 😊

  • @Lennaperez12
    @Lennaperez12 Рік тому

    How can I just be myself knowing that I have been through so much, I like myself but I feel like no one likes me or wants to be around me. I’m always awkward around people.

  • @abethajeevarathinam1640
    @abethajeevarathinam1640 Рік тому

    Hey elicia❤ can you make a video on how to cope up with loneliness in your healing era

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому +1

      I have a video on my channel about this ❤️

  • @Charlottegutierrez-v9o
    @Charlottegutierrez-v9o Рік тому

    The fact you can see who’s not subscribed 🥶

  • @chill.coffee
    @chill.coffee Рік тому

    Elicia, I'm currently in my mid-teenage years and your videos help me alot but I want to ask about it something you said at around 4:41 because maybe we sympathise for people who are more shy ( low self worth)?

  • @andrewthepancake
    @andrewthepancake Рік тому

    Can you make a video (or small part of a video) dedicated to spending money on things we need (or even want)? I am debt free and have two jobs yet still feel horrible when I buy myself a book or something, or even when I get new shirts and donate old ones. I think that has something to do with confidence even. Thx :D

  • @Vanityzz
    @Vanityzz Рік тому

    I absolutely love your top! Where is it from, pretty please?

  • @edwardleecaliforniausa
    @edwardleecaliforniausa Рік тому +2

    Hi good morning happy Saturday morning and happy weekend and I loved your vlogs and you are amazing Supporter and I'm proud of you

  • @roxy2227
    @roxy2227 Рік тому

    Anyone now where the top is from? It's gorgeous!!! 😍😍😍

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому +1

      Aww thanks babe!! It’s from aritzia ❤️

  • @ABC-gt4rd
    @ABC-gt4rd Рік тому

    Where do you have your top from?

  • @asmrizzy1574
    @asmrizzy1574 Рік тому

    what video is this??

  • @5kgxistiouvockzit7r94
    @5kgxistiouvockzit7r94 Рік тому +1

    Elicia, would you consider a video about ageing? The thing is, I know professionally I'm good and will be respected with age, but I don't see that with romantic relationships. It seems as tho men only want looks and will treat their wife for a newer version any time. It's so hard to find a genuinely valuable partner because of what society puts in our brains. You truly cannot escape

    • @eliciagoguen
      @eliciagoguen  Рік тому +2

      This definitely is more of a limiting belief in my opinion so I would start to explore where you picked up these beliefs, and if you don’t want to believe this then what’s the new belief system you could start tapping into? I can definitely talk about this eventually, but to me this is simply a limiting believe in which can absolutely be changed!. It is going to be up to you whether you would like to change this belief system though 🥰

  • @Nicole-wd8yg
    @Nicole-wd8yg Рік тому

    Another videos yes

  • @ToriFame-f2t
    @ToriFame-f2t Рік тому

    Helloooo

  • @arundhutisaikiaa
    @arundhutisaikiaa Рік тому

    I love you

  • @essence____beauty_92
    @essence____beauty_92 Рік тому

    What amazing video ❤❤❤ thank you very much 🌸🌸🌸🦋🦋🙏🏽🙏🏽🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

  • @kc270352
    @kc270352 Рік тому +4

    you cant just "be Confident", confidence takes years to build and its something people have to work on, and you cant be confident if you haven't got anything to be confident about in the first place

    • @ylime5544
      @ylime5544 Рік тому

      A few months ago I would’ve agreed. Now I am thinking „fake it till you make it“ and I don’t give a shit how much courage it takes me. I do it. That’s the difference - doing stuff, surprising yourself. This makes me expressing myself and confident ❤

  • @fernandavaxcon
    @fernandavaxcon Рік тому

    Always come back here when needing a punch of reality 🥲 Her words just bring me back

  • @puffedpoison5475
    @puffedpoison5475 Рік тому +1

    my notes
    CONFIDENCE
    shadow self
    ❤️‍🔥things i don’t like about myself and the reasoning (choose out of the list that you are ready to face because you are tired of feeling this way and you accept you for who you are
    🫶🏻try pointing out things you love about yourself to help you
    🫶🏻try doing it alone and be comfortable with yourself, stay positive
    🫶🏻do what ifs, think of it rationally and then switching to your own opinion of someone
    🫶🏻accept yourself, you are not perfect and would never judge someone like you judge yourself
    ACCEPTING MYSELF
    mindset
    🤍 stop caring about what others think because at the end of the day it not the end of the world, only care about your feelings and accept what others accept
    🤍 practice indifference, don’t put people on a pedestal. nobody is better than you stay away from trying to justify why they “are” and be aware that this is your old mindset but you’re practicing a new one
    🤍 willing to release attachments and losing someone that makes you feel like you can’t be yourself, be your natural self and authentic
    🤍 a confident person doesn’t care if someone leaves, “like me or leave me”
    🤍 you lose yourself when you want people to like you (huge separation of where we stand beside a person)
    🤍 remind yourself of what you’re working on
    🤍 don’t strive for achievements to make others proud
    🤍 NO FAKE IT TO YOU MAKE IT
    🤍 balance yourself, don’t underwork or overwork yourself because both do not help self love

  • @nicoalychavez
    @nicoalychavez Рік тому

    I may be a guy, but I love those videos keep it up Elicia! Btw I sent you a quick message on Instagram, let me know if it went through :)

  • @RemiReagan
    @RemiReagan Рік тому

    So helpful ❤

  • @visualvibezz
    @visualvibezz Рік тому

    I made the promise to myself today to stop begging ❤️‍🩹