To the people reading the comments before watching the video, this is comedy GOLD as well as informative. Chappelle has nothing on Tony. I was hollering the whole time
You’re so right, Brother Gaskins! I can make 5 stops in a day, and all the women will go ON about my outfit, my hair, my skin, everything. I can walk passed a man and not even a head nod. Looking well put together, clean, and smelling good doesn’t get the same responses as in the 90s and early 2000s. It’s a drastic change. Smh 🤦🏾♀️🤷🏽♀️
He’s right tho, I used to watch porn, I used to feel like what’s the point of getting with a women if I can just watch porn. But I don’t watch porn anymore I’m 3 years free, neither do I think like that anymore.
I will admit when you look at social media, there are countless beautiful women!! Perfect hair, makeup, clothes, body, etc. I hardly see any of those types of women in real life.
It’s because in real life even those women don’t really look like that. I can’t tell you how many times I have seen a woman who looks like a model online and in real life she looks super average. It’s all makeup, photo editing and they know how to work their angles.
This so real. Me & the homeboys be QUICK to approach a woman who dresses modestly AND who can really put an outfit together(bonus points for smelling nice🥵).. wear clothes that compliment your skin tone & your frame. Me personally, I’m a sucka for jewelry & other accessories(details matter). Also, wear it with confidence! & when you dress modestly, the men that do approach you are likely more genuine & have better intentions!
Nowadays, men want the easiest women/options possible. And when I say easy, I don’t necessarily mean loose. They want women who don’t require a lot of effort. From the moment you look like you require more than the bare minimum, they WILL NOT approach. And then these same men will complain that there’s no good women out there 😂😂😂
One of the key factors of this is porn. . It’s the fact that women are so accessible. Just keep praying that’s all we can do. It’s hard out here but hope is not lost. Fashion sense does help alot too!
I don’t get approached either. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because I’m not dressing in revealing clothing. It’s frustrating but I’m learning to be ok with being alone. It might be God’s will.
I will never forget walking in NYC and having a handsome businessman walk pass me and say excuse me I think your outfit is so classy😊 Classy but stylish dress (without showing everything) absolutely gets men to speak to you.
Yes, men love classy women and we appreciate doing the undressing you with our eyes. Wrap yourself like a christmas gift and leave us guessing. Men like to work hard for their prey- give them something to earn but be practical and upfront. Men don't respect or care much for easy women, hence the reason we don't wife up prostitutes. Anyways, keep classy and virtuous.
I used to think men don’t approach but they do. I get approached every…single…day. Sometimes 3 in a day and I’m just casually living my life but before, I could go months with no one even looking at me. When I was wearing gym/athleisure clothes like Gym Shark, Joah Brown, Lululemon, no one was approaching me. I felt sloppy and decided to start dressing again and I wanted to still feel like I’m in sweats but look put together. I also wanted to preserve the environment by investing in a quality sustainable capsule wardrobe. The goal was never men but I accidentally cracked the code and it was a pleasant surprise. Once I got out of sneakers and itchy polyester fast fashion and got into 100% linen, cashmere, wool, cotton, lyocell, etc. they flocked to me. Because I want to be comfortable I wear dainty pieces like linen trousers and a cute little top. Flowy vacation style pants that is classy but you can still see the booty bootying. Sandals with nice pedicured toes. Smaller daintier jewelry. I later realized these pieces aren’t just comfortable they’re also classy and feminine. No wonder men started flocking towards me. Pair that with a good perfume, nice hair and natural looking make-up? Chefs kiss! I was like wow all I had to do was get out of those sweats and sneakers. Edit: Oh I also changed my mindset. I stopped telling myself negative things about men and relationships and purposefully looked for the good in men and relationships. Maybe that changed my demeanor as well. 🤷🏽♀️
I still get approached. The nonsense the young ones say is another story. Most mature men are respectful and know how to initiate a conversation to put me at ease. Just my experience.
I have witnessed men pursuing women because of her skin tone, body or hair. I hear what you saying but all men are not the same or looking for the same things in women. They walk pass good women everyday. Some men are gay, bi sexual, married or have a girlfriend or want to be single. Not enough high value men for all these women.
I can tell he has a sister. There’s always this “thing” a man possess… respects women, can talk to women about what most men think is corny like hair or clothes, no pointless flirting while still being a gentleman (see women as a human), but still masculine and knows how to exist with a woman Rare.
America has a problem. In Europe 🌍 and UNITED Kingdom men approach me always even when I am at Cafe he asks me if I am single solo 😂 they get straight to the point. This is why I STOPPED dating in America since 17 years ago no thanks.
I believe you! It is America if you don't fit into the standard of beauty over here. We gets no love!!?? It's hard & sad. And if you are a "senior citizen" like myself.. forget about it!
@@loismartin9634 Your still young don't call yourself "senior citizen" see that's American system labeling programing their citizens. I cannot stand those terms or "broken 💔 home or broken family" 💔 your young tell yourself everyday that your beautiful you love yourself and your 35! I wake up in the morning 🌄 screaming my lungs out saying I am happy I love myself life is beautiful I am beautiful I am a billionaire HAPPILY living in my beautiful villa in Switzerland married to my handsome sweet romantic Billionaire life is beautiful ❤️💜 wishing you a beautiful weekend be happy 😊 keep your smile 😁
This is exactly how i feel lately its been like you have to look so revealing in order for a nice man to look at you. Its not like what it used to be. Nowadays men are very different. I was just asking myself whats wrong with me? Nothing is wrong with me. But Let me go 🛍️ Thanks Mr. Gaskins❤
Try to keep it at a sexy medium! Get in shape and wear something they will show off your curves just a little bit. I'm not saying to dress provocatively, but don't dress like an old woman either!
I’ve been asking myself the same question because I’ve been single for over 9 yrs. In all honesty a lot of men are players and they are not looking for anything real and I’m talking about men who are over 40 and in 50. The dating world is completely different, I’m 46, l own a beautiful home, great job, nice car, financial and emotional stable and I look good. Even when I step out of the box and to somebody who I wouldn’t normally talk to, they are still about games and foolishness. I feel like all the good men are already taken.
Single mom living in Jersey and getting approached. Also my friends but the setting and the environment also has been playing a part in this. Respectful setting atmosphere.
@1Racki I have been approached by older and younger men and they would tell me how beautiful I am, staring me down. The old school men would ask me for my number, but the younger men would ask me what's your Instagram 😆
I feel like that’s only true if the woman is beautiful and the guy may think she she’s out of his league or has a man etc. if not the reason is what Tony is saying . Ain’t man fear rejection by no average woman
Funny bc I’m wearing a brown shirt rn ahahah, but this guy one day did approach me at the store and said “you’re beautiful I just thought I’d let you know because people aren’t doing that anymore “ 😮 times have changed but I do believe we just have to stand out in a non thirsty way lol
I dress classy sometimes & other times I dress sexy. Like you said men are super desensitized & I think they are lazy. I’m rarely approached, I take very good care of myself. I think we are just in a really weird space right now. I don’t take it personal,I’ve learned to take it as a compliment. God is saving me.
This is very true. Men are very visual . I happen to be someone who loves fashion and dress “up to date” so to speak men always Compliment me and it’s funny because many of them are careful not to be offensive and are extra polite as if they are afraid of being offensive. Something as simple as wearing heels with whatever you have on gets a ton of attention and compliments from men because most women don’t wear heels anymore.
honestly I have mixed feelings about being approached. I prefer men approaching me&giving me compliments that don't revolve around my body shape and telling me I'm sexy. I value and love when men especially black men compliment me on my natural hair. Or my outfit or say I'm beautiful or anything but sexy. I feel like the sexy word i'll only be receptive to when its husband/boyfriend. I always dress up even at home. I wear cute lounge wear. My mom told us a lady should always look presentable. She even taught me about bright feminine colors and feminine details. She cultivated me into the girly girl I am today.
@@Brandiisbeloved I must say men hardly ever say anything about my body I’m glad because that would be offensive they really do treat you the way you carry yourself ( in most cases)
I went out to a afterwork restaurant by myself. I chose to sit at the bar this particular day. I go back and forth. Sometimes I will sit at the bars to eat and sometimes I will get a table.. I looked good and felt good with an African print dress, hair up in a cute bun and was wearing fashion glasses.. There were 2 men in particular who stared at me the whole time and NEVER even said HI... They were nice looking, well groomed so I made intentional eye contact.. They didn't do anything but look...SMH..
Yeah they be so nervous ik that’s what it is…..I was at the gas station this guy he was very handsome and I literally was staring at me until I left the gas station and even when I was leaving he was watching my car 😂 but he never said anything and this happens often it’s crazy
@@Realasf5 I guess it can be a mixture of things..I'm starting to believe that men really think they are the " prize". They want women to approach them , and then they will turn it around and throw in our face that we are too masculine 🤷🏾. They don't understand that they are MAKING us the way that we are..
@@genovasquez8361 yeah I get what you saying. The boy at my job told me he never said anything to me because he thought I was going to cuss him out & I’m literally quiet as a mouse… I just have a natural look like that but I’ll start smiling more… I get approached but guys be scared to talk to me majority of them say the same damn thing 😂 until they get to know me and say i never would’ve thought that’s why you never judge a book by it’s cover
Tony is right about clothing choices and I’ll add one thing that is also controllable: fitness. It’s part of the 3 B’s: Brains, Brand, Body. I listened to that advice. Before I was fit, some men would shoot their shot here and there. Once I got my weight down, I get approached so often that I sometimes wear a ring on my finger when I go out to be left alone lol. It makes a drastic difference.
Excellent video Tony! And let me just say that I absolutely LOVE Sheri's style!! It's definitely top notch fashion (shocked to find out you pick out most of her pieces). You should definitely start a fashion consulting business. I love looking at her Instagram seeing what outfit she's going to step out in next!... We as women can still be fashionable, sexy and feminine without dressing provocative and compromising our morals and values. Thank you for your continuos awesome teaching, wisdom and guidance. It's greatly appreciated.
Guys don't approach me either! I just look at it as God is protecting me from wolves in sheep's clothing & preserving me for my Boaz! Not a perfect man, but perfect for me!
I get approached by men who aren’t my type. Like for instance I’m 26 & I had a 15 year old come make a move while I was at sky zone with my kids. I COULD NOT BELIEVE IT & when I told him I’m older than 18 & too old for him he said it wasn’t a problem & I just was lost for words. Just today a man came up to me & said he looking for a “step mom” & he was with his toddler child. Again, not who I would want to be with. I told him I’m not dating right now & he just kept walking with his daughter. Last week a man waited for me to come out of a restaurant and said “he seen me walking in & would love my # & the way he came off was creepy. (Like my body in a ditch weird). Kept trying & I said I’m not looking. . . . They say you attract who you are, but I am none of those things? Realized I probably won’t be with anyone for the rest of my life. Is what it is. People are weird anyway.
All men like a beautiful woman. Even weird guys. It’s not anything about you that has those gentlemen approaching you. If you were to entertain those guys, then that would be a reflection on you.
Honey attracts all manner of insects... from Creation we know what you attract is not necessarily what you are. However, who you choose to entertain determines who you will be... keep holding to your standards in a respectful way, and check out a few different circles ...
I understand that situation was crazy but you also gotta understand that in general what you call “creepy” or “weird” can just be a man being nervous or socially awkward because he doesn’t have experience with women. You gotta take time to peel back a layer and see the MALE EXPERIENCE. To see why men do the things they do.
Great video Tony 👌🏾 You gave really great points. Men are very visual and I get approached by men. Men love to see women wear accessories and details too: hats, jewelery, cute shoes, nails painted, cute bag, lip gloss/lipstick. Men love to see us with the small details. This is one of Tony's best videos.
Your demographic matters also. I live in a small city where people are predominantly white and married with kids. It's a very family centered city..As a single black woman, I have been approached 7 times in 16 years by only Black men. Most black men in my city are married or dating white women. I not only have to comlete with younger black women, but white women also. Im not very social at all so that is working against me too! Boy, I need help 😂
Same with my daughter. She has a killer shape, educated, also well dress, hair makeup. She gets passed up for a unkept WW. No style nothing. I keep telling my daughter she has to move.
I do agree with taking good care of how you look and dress because I like unique things myself. However, if this man or woman is connected in a relationship with the Holy Spirit. they will see beauty first no matter how well you're dressed, yet the spirits will speak to each other that will outlast the fashion style ✨️ 🩷
This is true. I learned this a year ago, and the simple art of loving myself enough to care better for myself & putting my self forward every day as a habit completely changed my life!
You are definitely a teacher and God has given you a gift of explaining and giving examples that teach relationships. The way you used fashion to teach us how to stand out is a gift. Thank you. We appreciate you.
I found your channel today. I’ve learned so much - especially in this video. Thx for your honesty and willingness to share without demeaning women. Blessing to you & your wife. 🙏
I studied this back on 2008 my professor told me he ready for the new world of relationship it will be online 💗 she said the internet would take over she wasn't lying 😭
Yo honestly thank you for this video! After years we get to see Sheri closet. So grateful! I thank God he gave you the wisdom to describe what uniquely jazzy means 😂 because that’s exactly how I’ve been trying to dress lately (my personal style mixed with trendy) and I haven’t been sure about it until now. This is dope fr
I can't like this video enough times. Incredibly incredibly helpful. And so helpful to feel better about the why of all the times I've felt invisible lately.
You’re so right. And for me personally I get the most male Attention when I’m dressed business conservative casual. ..side note: Sheri’s closet is goals!! Love her style
I totally agree with you on this. How a woman carries herself is the main reason she is or not approached by men. If you present yourself as unapproachable, they get that message at first glance.
@Sunshine-un2tq yes I have heard that description recently and I assume it means that they have an air about them that says don't come toward me unless you are correct. But my question is how will you know what is correct if you fear talking to them 🤣
@Sunshine-un2tq K I’m gonna go ahead and give you a list of what makes a woman approachable since no one taught the average woman how to be pleasant towards men. 1.) Open body language (making a passage to engage) 2.)Soft facial expressions (not mugging me like a damn man) 3.) Smiling (bubbly aura) 4.) Friendly Eye contact (no eye rolling it’s disrespectful) 5.) Allowing me to look and not feel like a creep for doing so. 6.) Being welcoming (this is a part two to my first point) 7.) Laugh at my damn jokes please 8.) Uncrossed arms 9.) Looking around the room 10.) Not hating men. Need more?
Men are not approaching because 1 - they want perfection when they've not perfect 2- they believe there's a better woman out there than the one they may eventually choose
I do get approached just find your own individual style and take care of yourself and feel good about what you’re wearing and you don’t have to show nothing my advice nails toes hair skin and most important take care of your body God bless
And might I add Never, ever had any problems attracting True Alpha Males. Do not wear anything tight….. anything behind showing…… never felt necessary…… I’m from the 70’s,….we were taught….. how to “EXCUDE” Confidence……. 💯 This a “Contributing Factor “. This is a High Value Female……💯How dress classy,proper dressing,…pants,or slacks, how to mix & Match. Still I wear all my clothes below the knee, or calf’s. But “Always Always “ Be a Lady…….. Thank you….❤❤❤❤
I agree with Tony on dressing uniquely as a woman. It not only makes you feel good about yourself. But it also draws people to you for either opportunities and men who are interested in dating and possible long term relationships. This goes for unique hairstyles that look good on you and make you feel good. Over the years I have put energy into the type of clothes that I wear that is different from the trends as well as switching my hairstyles to see what looks good on me and how it makes me feel. Clothes and hairstyles can age you to make you look older or younger. I have a young look so I had to learn how to dress a little more mature in order to be taken seriously and to look somewhat my age to make sure I'm getting approached by men that are around my age group.
Hi ladies and Tony! Im laughing to myself. Im 51 and I get approached by men when I’m out. I usually wear jeans and a cute shirt like you say Tony. Also, on Halloween a few years ago I dressed up as a chucky doll and I got approached by 3 men. 😂 Apparently some older men approach like the old days. I guess it helps if we appear approachable and guys see our smile.
SO TRUE A very powerful video . Image is SO important in today's world we CANNOT downplay y this . A particular look can be the difference between one life or the other or one opportunity or the next . Fine line . Thank you Mr Gaskin for speaking the truth.
Hey Tony, I love the video. Certain parts you had me rolling, as usual. I like your virtual shopping idea. You should start it. Is dunks a Florida thing?
Tony u are cracking me up! 😂😂😂 It’s the truth though. Lord knows I’m trying to look good for my man and most importantly me. I’m gone always be looking good no matter what. It’s so important!
I am a wardrobe stylist that holds seminars about ‘Personal Style’. What Tony is saying is 1000% true. You HAVE to present yourself to the world in a way that is unique to YOU.
Excellent advice/video for women of all ages in all seasons of life❤ Style can be curated to your taste. It doesn't have to be expensive but it does take time to develop a style that compliments your individuality right where you are. TY
As a woman, I can say that men do approach me in social situations such as parties, but not often out in public unless I am dressed very femininely and have really good energy that day. That being said, I also believe feminist women really dropped the ball on this one. They INSISTED that men absolutely do not approach them in public, that it's creepy, it's weird, that they would publicly shame men if they did, etc...and the men listened. A lot of men I've spoken to have said they would like to approach women but the social ramifications are too big, especially if you live in a progressive neighborhood. Contrary to popular belief, most men aren't creeps and don't like being a bother women. So they'd rather just go on online dating, it feels more anonymous and safe.
Thanks to feminism you as a woman are no longer a second class citizen. Thanks to feminism you can drive a car and vote and work and get paid the same as a man. Feminism is not the issue the issue is men approaching women for all the wrong reasons. If a guy does approach me it's usually for s3x and nothing else. Also men I'm not interested in dating approach me also. These men need to stay in their lanes. Also men only approach the 12 percent of women they deem attractive and they won't approach average looking women.
I totally agree with you! I hate the logic of some feminist and how they are just complete man haters. I meet a lot nice men that actually appreciate the way I dress or me being a feminine woman. It’s sad mainly with the fact men don’t feel safe and rather go online.
💯 I agree with Tony, but like he also mentioned in previous videos the more you are out and in comfortable cute casual wear it does increase the likelihood of men approaching you in person...I can attest to that as a single mom that have to run a lot of errands and staying active for health...men approach me more with no makeup on and in relaxed/comfy wear
Tony, you're absolutely right. It's a disconnect. In real life women aren't carrying themselves the way the women on sites like only fans or IG are carrying themselves.
A lot of people in general need styling advice. Some are either too revealing or look like they don’t care to even run a brush through their hair. All of us have off days every blue moon, but my parents always told me not to go outside half stepping. We used to be put on punishment as kids if we went out looking unkept. It’s something that stuck with me and it does make men approach you when you look good and show class
My gym trainer saw my photo on my phone's lock scream and he said, "Oh wow you're a catfish." I was very hurt even though I didn't filter the photo it also showed me I have to try a little harder on my day-to-day looks, especially at the gym since that's really the only place I see guys. I find I put more effort into my outfits when I am going out and not so much into my everyday style. My friend told me that my everyday outfits look like I am a happily married woman, not someone who is single and approachable. However, the outfits she suggested are from loosebootie910's favorite store, so I always ignored her. I like the tips Tony gave in this video and look forward to more suggestions because they are practical and basically what I already do but more intentional.
I really appreciate you talking to the ladies. Women now a days do not have a clue. It’s quite unfortunate that many ladies never had a mother to teach them. I am full grown with a 25 year old son. My mother taught me how to be a lady and I can’t believe the climate of the world today. It has never been my desire to have a strange man lusting after me. So many things are just low vibration and lack of discipline. You are truly needed! Thank you
T. Gaskins thank you for this word!! I need to step my fashion game UP!! I love Mrs. Gaskins style and that really inspired me as a single woman to do better…
To the people reading the comments before watching the video, this is comedy GOLD as well as informative. Chappelle has nothing on Tony. I was hollering the whole time
Pure comedy gold, with wisdom ti boot! 😂😂🙏🏾🙏🏾
Im ALWAYS HOLLERING😂😂 and get the message clear at the same time
😂😂😂
😁😆
" Videos of booty cheeks " 😂
You’re so right, Brother Gaskins! I can make 5 stops in a day, and all the women will go ON about my outfit, my hair, my skin, everything. I can walk passed a man and not even a head nod. Looking well put together, clean, and smelling good doesn’t get the same responses as in the 90s and early 2000s. It’s a drastic change. Smh 🤦🏾♀️🤷🏽♀️
Older men will approach me
And compliment me
Men my age not so
But they will stare
All Facts smh
@@chrisharris2367 SAME 💯
Same! I’m pristine and yet only attract the ladies lol
@@chrisharris2367same
He’s right tho, I used to watch porn, I used to feel like what’s the point of getting with a women if I can just watch porn. But I don’t watch porn anymore I’m 3 years free, neither do I think like that anymore.
Good for u bro....I never watched it....but Im sure its not the same as a woman👍
Studies have shown that pornography is bad for the brain
@@beefaye6861 To have never watched porn that’s a strong woman , God bless!
@@sueann9065 thank you, God bless!
Praise God for your deliverance from pornography!
I will admit when you look at social media, there are countless beautiful women!! Perfect hair, makeup, clothes, body, etc. I hardly see any of those types of women in real life.
I see a lot of them
@@jazzy9282me too. I work with a lot of them.
Right. I have never seen one insta baddies in real life … where do they go after they post
@UpRyzeQueen I guess it just depends on the state or city you live in.
It’s because in real life even those women don’t really look like that. I can’t tell you how many times I have seen a woman who looks like a model online and in real life she looks super average. It’s all makeup, photo editing and they know how to work their angles.
Having a nice body will definitely help you out! You can wear anything and look good if the body is bodying!!! 😂😂
Fact sis!
This so real. Me & the homeboys be QUICK to approach a woman who dresses modestly AND who can really put an outfit together(bonus points for smelling nice🥵).. wear clothes that compliment your skin tone & your frame. Me personally, I’m a sucka for jewelry & other accessories(details matter). Also, wear it with confidence!
& when you dress modestly, the men that do approach you are likely more genuine & have better intentions!
naw, i had good intentions from the start but having a lack of internet in my own home and talking amongst a shitload of people fucked me over
Thank you for speaking out!
You and the homeboys be quick to simp.
@@AmericanMGTOW I promise, no woman wants to date you in the first place.
Nowadays, men want the easiest women/options possible. And when I say easy, I don’t necessarily mean loose. They want women who don’t require a lot of effort. From the moment you look like you require more than the bare minimum, they WILL NOT approach. And then these same men will complain that there’s no good women out there 😂😂😂
oof...... this right here ^^
Yes guys she had us at the beginning
One of the key factors of this is porn. . It’s the fact that women are so accessible. Just keep praying that’s all we can do. It’s hard out here but hope is not lost. Fashion sense does help alot too!
@keepitreal7723yup that’s why when majority of them on the death bed nobody is there for them
I don’t get approached either. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because I’m not dressing in revealing clothing. It’s frustrating but I’m learning to be ok with being alone. It might be God’s will.
That part!!!
I recommend reading books on the law of attraction. Believe, Move, Pray.
Ikr
God gives us free will and he made Eve for Adam so that would be contrary to what he established
Are you actively social ? Are you going to Christian local or State meetups?
I fear for my daughter in this world. I pray for God’s protection over her daily. Glad I’m not in this raggedy dating scene anymore.
What makes it raggedy?
@@proctorjunior14immature men and women
I will never forget walking in NYC and having a handsome businessman walk pass me and say excuse me I think your outfit is so classy😊 Classy but stylish dress (without showing everything) absolutely gets men to speak to you.
Just going to remain classy, decent and respectful to my own self. Whoever wants to approach is up to them. I'm good with myself. Thanks.
Exactly !!!
Exactly
Yes, men love classy women and we appreciate doing the undressing you with our eyes. Wrap yourself like a christmas gift and leave us guessing. Men like to work hard for their prey- give them something to earn but be practical and upfront. Men don't respect or care much for easy women, hence the reason we don't wife up prostitutes. Anyways, keep classy and virtuous.
Some of these demons so disgusting, I’m starting to care less and less about being “approached” or being in an unfruitful relationship.
Cool, go away
@@MrTwonetwone ok Satan
@@genovasquez8361 demonic spirits with ill intentions
I used to think men don’t approach but they do. I get approached every…single…day. Sometimes 3 in a day and I’m just casually living my life but before, I could go months with no one even looking at me. When I was wearing gym/athleisure clothes like Gym Shark, Joah Brown, Lululemon, no one was approaching me. I felt sloppy and decided to start dressing again and I wanted to still feel like I’m in sweats but look put together. I also wanted to preserve the environment by investing in a quality sustainable capsule wardrobe. The goal was never men but I accidentally cracked the code and it was a pleasant surprise. Once I got out of sneakers and itchy polyester fast fashion and got into 100% linen, cashmere, wool, cotton, lyocell, etc. they flocked to me. Because I want to be comfortable I wear dainty pieces like linen trousers and a cute little top. Flowy vacation style pants that is classy but you can still see the booty bootying. Sandals with nice pedicured toes. Smaller daintier jewelry. I later realized these pieces aren’t just comfortable they’re also classy and feminine. No wonder men started flocking towards me. Pair that with a good perfume, nice hair and natural looking make-up? Chefs kiss! I was like wow all I had to do was get out of those sweats and sneakers.
Edit: Oh I also changed my mindset. I stopped telling myself negative things about men and relationships and purposefully looked for the good in men and relationships. Maybe that changed my demeanor as well. 🤷🏽♀️
God bless you sister
Thanks for sharing.
Help the single ladies Tony! Keep these videos coming! They are NEEDED!
He do be helping! They not goin give him his flowers though
Help yourselves lmao what a joke
I still get approached. The nonsense the young ones say is another story. Most mature men are respectful and know how to initiate a conversation to put me at ease. Just my experience.
Men are not perfect 10 but that's what they want! I always dress classy and with makeup and hair done in a classy way - never get approached.
Same
Me too…
Same. Only old guys...
Me either! But I'm older 😊
@@loismartin9634 So am I, but so are a lot of men - LOL
I have witnessed men pursuing women because of her skin tone, body or hair. I hear what you saying but all men are not the same or looking for the same things in women. They walk pass good women everyday. Some men are gay, bi sexual, married or have a girlfriend or want to be single. Not enough high value men for all these women.
Always turn it on men. No accountability yawn
I get approached often but I’m afraid of dating, it’s getting scary.
Especially Brothas they can't handle rejection. They want to do bodily harm
rejection is the worst - it's like the lady treats the brotha like an object and just throws him away 😭😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔💔
@@terceldude sorry you feel that way.
@@khartoniapratt2792 some do. We all should have compassion
🧢
I can tell he has a sister.
There’s always this “thing” a man possess… respects women, can talk to women about what most men think is corny like hair or clothes, no pointless flirting while still being a gentleman (see women as a human), but still masculine and knows how to exist with a woman
Rare.
See women as human is a huge one.
OMG!🤣Bro is so wise but he done stepped in the closet teaching women how to be "Uniquely Jazzy!"😆This has made my day!😂
Yupp women show too much online. We did it to ourselves
Finally accountability
America has a problem. In Europe 🌍 and UNITED Kingdom men approach me always even when I am at Cafe he asks me if I am single solo 😂 they get straight to the point. This is why I STOPPED dating in America since 17 years ago no thanks.
As a fellow European, I agree. Men are more relaxed and more proactive in approaching women.
Our men here in America have sadly been feminized- on purpose.
I believe you! It is America if you don't fit into the standard of beauty over here. We gets no love!!?? It's hard & sad. And if you are a "senior citizen" like myself..
forget about it!
@@loismartin9634 Your still young don't call yourself "senior citizen" see that's American system labeling programing their citizens. I cannot stand those terms or "broken 💔 home or broken family" 💔 your young tell yourself everyday that your beautiful you love yourself and your 35! I wake up in the morning 🌄 screaming my lungs out saying I am happy I love myself life is beautiful I am beautiful I am a billionaire HAPPILY living in my beautiful villa in Switzerland married to my handsome sweet romantic Billionaire life is beautiful ❤️💜 wishing you a beautiful weekend be happy 😊 keep your smile 😁
This is exactly how i feel lately its been like you have to look so revealing in order for a nice man to look at you. Its not like what it used to be. Nowadays men are very different. I was just asking myself whats wrong with me? Nothing is wrong with me. But Let me go 🛍️ Thanks Mr. Gaskins❤
"Nice men" are NOT looking for a ho. Fck boys are. NICE MEN are looking for respectably dressed women!!
Try to keep it at a sexy medium! Get in shape and wear something they will show off your curves just a little bit. I'm not saying to dress provocatively, but don't dress like an old woman either!
Many of us have had these same exact thoughts and questions and worries. It's not you. Its not me. These are dark times. Best wishes to you.
I’ve been asking myself the same question because I’ve been single for over 9 yrs. In all honesty a lot of men are players and they are not looking for anything real and I’m talking about men who are over 40 and in 50. The dating world is completely different, I’m 46, l own a beautiful home, great job, nice car, financial and emotional stable and I look good. Even when I step out of the box and to somebody who I wouldn’t normally talk to, they are still about games and foolishness. I feel like all the good men are already taken.
@@SB-dt6yp exactly the age range 🤦🏾♀️its really sad. Single and Celibate is the way💯
Single mom living in Jersey and getting approached. Also my friends but the setting and the environment also has been playing a part in this. Respectful setting atmosphere.
Men are not approaching because of the fear of rejection.
This the one it’s too many woman are being rude and disrespectful. You can’t even say hey how you doing nowadays they chumping you offf.
It’s because of online dating that’s why they not approaching
@1Racki I have been approached by older and younger men and they would tell me how beautiful I am, staring me down. The old school men would ask me for my number, but the younger men would ask me what's your Instagram 😆
I feel like that’s only true if the woman is beautiful and the guy may think she she’s out of his league or has a man etc. if not the reason is what Tony is saying . Ain’t man fear rejection by no average woman
@@RackGuerrano men are disgusted . Stop femsplaining
Funny bc I’m wearing a brown shirt rn ahahah, but this guy one day did approach me at the store and said “you’re beautiful I just thought I’d let you know because people aren’t doing that anymore “ 😮 times have changed but I do believe we just have to stand out in a non thirsty way lol
I dress classy sometimes & other times I dress sexy. Like you said men are super desensitized & I think they are lazy. I’m rarely approached, I take very good care of myself. I think we are just in a really weird space right now. I don’t take it personal,I’ve learned to take it as a compliment. God is saving me.
Tony is dropping all of these gems just in time for me to listen on my way home from work!
This is very true. Men are very visual . I happen to be someone who loves fashion and dress “up to date” so to speak men always Compliment me and it’s funny because many of them are careful not to be offensive and are extra polite as if they are afraid of being offensive. Something as simple as wearing heels with whatever you have on gets a ton of attention and compliments from men because most women don’t wear heels anymore.
So true. I make it a point to wear heels for that very reason. These days it’s so different to see women wearing heels and can walk in them lol
@@tarahbruno3793 that’s crazy when you think about women in the past would not be caught out in pants or flats
honestly I have mixed feelings about being approached. I prefer men approaching me&giving me compliments that don't revolve around my body shape and telling me I'm sexy. I value and love when men especially black men compliment me on my natural hair. Or my outfit or say I'm beautiful or anything but sexy. I feel like the sexy word i'll only be receptive to when its husband/boyfriend. I always dress up even at home. I wear cute lounge wear. My mom told us a lady should always look presentable. She even taught me about bright feminine colors and feminine details. She cultivated me into the girly girl I am today.
@@Brandiisbeloved I must say men hardly ever say anything about my body I’m glad because that would be offensive they really do treat you the way you carry yourself ( in most cases)
@@BrandiisbelovedI was just talking about this the sexy just gives weird vibes
I went out to a afterwork restaurant by myself. I chose to sit at the bar this particular day. I go back and forth. Sometimes I will sit at the bars to eat and sometimes I will get a table.. I looked good and felt good with an African print dress, hair up in a cute bun and was wearing fashion glasses.. There were 2 men in particular who stared at me the whole time and NEVER even said HI... They were nice looking, well groomed so I made intentional eye contact.. They didn't do anything but look...SMH..
Yeah they be so nervous ik that’s what it is…..I was at the gas station this guy he was very handsome and I literally was staring at me until I left the gas station and even when I was leaving he was watching my car 😂 but he never said anything and this happens often it’s crazy
@@Realasf5
I guess it can be a mixture of things..I'm starting to believe that men really think they are the " prize". They want women to approach them , and then they will turn it around and throw in our face that we are too masculine 🤷🏾. They don't understand that they are MAKING us the way that we are..
@@genovasquez8361 yeah I get what you saying. The boy at my job told me he never said anything to me because he thought I was going to cuss him out & I’m literally quiet as a mouse… I just have a natural look like that but I’ll start smiling more… I get approached but guys be scared to talk to me majority of them say the same damn thing 😂 until they get to know me and say i never would’ve thought that’s why you never judge a book by it’s cover
They also could have been in relationships. Absolutely noticed you but were not at liberty to approach, just a thought...
Tony is right about clothing choices and I’ll add one thing that is also controllable: fitness. It’s part of the 3 B’s: Brains, Brand, Body. I listened to that advice. Before I was fit, some men would shoot their shot here and there. Once I got my weight down, I get approached so often that I sometimes wear a ring on my finger when I go out to be left alone lol. It makes a drastic difference.
I don't know. I've been slim my whole life and I can remember ONE TIME I was approached and I was married at the time.
Thank you Brother Gaskins for putting us on game🙏🏾
This was a very good video! Thanks Big brother Tony!
Tony, thank you for breaking this subject down! I loved the Toyota Tercel/dream car example!
I haven’t heard the word “Jazzy” in FOREVER!! 😂😂😂
Excellent video Tony! And let me just say that I absolutely LOVE Sheri's style!! It's definitely top notch fashion (shocked to find out you pick out most of her pieces). You should definitely start a fashion consulting business. I love looking at her Instagram seeing what outfit she's going to step out in next!... We as women can still be fashionable, sexy and feminine without dressing provocative and compromising our morals and values. Thank you for your continuos awesome teaching, wisdom and guidance. It's greatly appreciated.
Guys don't approach me either! I just look at it as God is protecting me from wolves in sheep's clothing & preserving me for my Boaz! Not a perfect man, but perfect for me!
Great video. I'm ready to take the fashion class, Tony!!
I get approached by men who aren’t my type. Like for instance I’m 26 & I had a 15 year old come make a move while I was at sky zone with my kids. I COULD NOT BELIEVE IT & when I told him I’m older than 18 & too old for him he said it wasn’t a problem & I just was lost for words.
Just today a man came up to me & said he looking for a “step mom” & he was with his toddler child. Again, not who I would want to be with. I told him I’m not dating right now & he just kept walking with his daughter.
Last week a man waited for me to come out of a restaurant and said “he seen me walking in & would love my # & the way he came off was creepy. (Like my body in a ditch weird). Kept trying & I said I’m not looking. . . .
They say you attract who you are, but I am none of those things? Realized I probably won’t be with anyone for the rest of my life. Is what it is. People are weird anyway.
All men like a beautiful woman. Even weird guys. It’s not anything about you that has those gentlemen approaching you. If you were to entertain those guys, then that would be a reflection on you.
Honey attracts all manner of insects... from Creation we know what you attract is not necessarily what you are. However, who you choose to entertain determines who you will be... keep holding to your standards in a respectful way, and check out a few different circles ...
I understand that situation was crazy but you also gotta understand that in general what you call “creepy” or “weird” can just be a man being nervous or socially awkward because he doesn’t have experience with women. You gotta take time to peel back a layer and see the MALE EXPERIENCE. To see why men do the things they do.
@@improvementaddict6005wow that’s a good point ❤
Smh at the 15yr old comment 😂
Great video Tony 👌🏾
You gave really great points. Men are very visual and I get approached by men. Men love to see women wear accessories and details too: hats, jewelery, cute shoes, nails painted, cute bag, lip gloss/lipstick. Men love to see us with the small details. This is one of Tony's best videos.
Your demographic matters also. I live in a small city where people are predominantly white and married with kids. It's a very family centered city..As a single black woman, I have been approached 7 times in 16 years by only Black men. Most black men in my city are married or dating white women. I not only have to comlete with younger black women, but white women also. Im not very social at all so that is working against me too! Boy, I need help 😂
Same with my daughter. She has a killer shape, educated, also well dress, hair makeup. She gets passed up for a unkept WW. No style nothing.
I keep telling my daughter she has to move.
Hunny do you live in Seattle? Lol And I agree demo DOES MATTER! :)
May The Lord Help You to find a good and faithful man ❤ Amen and Amen 🙏
why haven't you moved dear?
Boy, you need to move 😅
I do agree with taking good care of how you look and dress because I like unique things myself. However, if this man or woman is connected in a relationship with the Holy Spirit. they will see beauty first no matter how well you're dressed, yet the spirits will speak to each other that will outlast the fashion style ✨️ 🩷
This is true. I learned this a year ago, and the simple art of loving myself enough to care better for myself & putting my self forward every day as a habit completely changed my life!
Hey Mr. Gaskins! You used the right word monochromatic was indeed the correct word to use in describing the all black outfit you told us about.
You are definitely a teacher and God has given you a gift of explaining and giving examples that teach relationships. The way you used fashion to teach us how to stand out is a gift. Thank you. We appreciate you.
I found your channel today. I’ve learned so much - especially in this video. Thx for your honesty and willingness to share without demeaning women. Blessing to you & your wife. 🙏
I studied this back on 2008 my professor told me he ready for the new world of relationship it will be online 💗 she said the internet would take over she wasn't lying 😭
It’s scary
@@tarahbruno3793 yesss it is I agree 💯 but this is what I studied back in 2008 and she was correct 💯
@@tarahbruno3793who was the professor
Yo honestly thank you for this video! After years we get to see Sheri closet. So grateful! I thank God he gave you the wisdom to describe what uniquely jazzy means 😂 because that’s exactly how I’ve been trying to dress lately (my personal style mixed with trendy) and I haven’t been sure about it until now. This is dope fr
Tony thank you for breaking it down. Greatly appreciated ❤
I can't like this video enough times. Incredibly incredibly helpful. And so helpful to feel better about the why of all the times I've felt invisible lately.
You’re so right. And for me personally I get the most male
Attention when I’m dressed business conservative casual. ..side note: Sheri’s closet is goals!! Love her style
Great video Tony❣️🙏🏾💖
I love that “uniquely jazzy”
I totally agree with you on this. How a woman carries herself is the main reason she is or not approached by men. If you present yourself as unapproachable, they get that message at first glance.
@Sunshine-un2tq yes I have heard that description recently and I assume it means that they have an air about them that says don't come toward me unless you are correct. But my question is how will you know what is correct if you fear talking to them 🤣
This is the real reason. Women don’t want to listen to this one though. Look unapproachable and watch I walk right past you.
@Sunshine-un2tq K I’m gonna go ahead and give you a list of what makes a woman approachable since no one taught the average woman how to be pleasant towards men.
1.) Open body language (making a passage to engage)
2.)Soft facial expressions (not mugging me like a damn man)
3.) Smiling (bubbly aura)
4.) Friendly Eye contact (no eye rolling it’s disrespectful)
5.) Allowing me to look and not feel like a creep for doing so.
6.) Being welcoming (this is a part two to my first point)
7.) Laugh at my damn jokes please
8.) Uncrossed arms
9.) Looking around the room
10.) Not hating men.
Need more?
@Sunshine-un2tqwow I worked hard on that list. Poured my heart out and that’s the response I get? 😒wow
@Sunshine-un2tq I was joking lol. Thanks for listening. 😊
Men are not approaching because
1 - they want perfection when they've not perfect
2- they believe there's a better woman out there than the one they may eventually choose
Tony thank you because this is wisdom that's needed. We must be teachable, intentional, & wise.
I love that Tony is pushing uniquely jazzy, and he is so correct on the hats that's for sassy ladies
This Year i invested heavily in my wardrobe! Best decision I ever made... and I can confirm, uniquely Jazzy WORKS
the way u teaching us ladies about dressing up in yo wife`s wardrobe is one of the cutest things ive ever seen haha
Right he’s so in tune with his wife 😊
I do get approached just find your own individual style and take care of yourself and feel good about what you’re wearing and you don’t have to show nothing my advice nails toes hair skin and most important take care of your body God bless
And might I add Never, ever had any problems attracting True Alpha Males. Do not wear anything tight….. anything behind showing…… never felt necessary…… I’m from the 70’s,….we were taught….. how to “EXCUDE” Confidence……. 💯 This a “Contributing Factor “. This is a High Value Female……💯How dress classy,proper dressing,…pants,or slacks, how to mix & Match. Still I wear all my clothes below the knee, or calf’s. But “Always Always “ Be a Lady…….. Thank you….❤❤❤❤
This was on point. I used to be sooo jazzy. Getting back to it. Notes taken.
Loved the honesty! So much Truth.
I agree with Tony on dressing uniquely as a woman. It not only makes you feel good about yourself. But it also draws people to you for either opportunities and men who are interested in dating and possible long term relationships. This goes for unique hairstyles that look good on you and make you feel good. Over the years I have put energy into the type of clothes that I wear that is different from the trends as well as switching my hairstyles to see what looks good on me and how it makes me feel. Clothes and hairstyles can age you to make you look older or younger. I have a young look so I had to learn how to dress a little more mature in order to be taken seriously and to look somewhat my age to make sure I'm getting approached by men that are around my age group.
Thank you TG. You are appreciated. This was right on time. 🙏🏾
I absolutely enjoyed this podcast!!!
You are well in your lane Mr Gaskins, authentic real and realistic....good stuff!
Hi ladies and Tony! Im laughing to myself. Im 51 and I get approached by men when I’m out. I usually wear jeans and a cute shirt like you say Tony. Also, on Halloween a few years ago I dressed up as a chucky doll and I got approached by 3 men. 😂
Apparently some older men approach like the old days. I guess it helps if we appear approachable and guys see our smile.
❤ this
@@debraspates3185 thank you! ❤️
That part! Smiles are approachable. 😅
@@aureliapetty-owens6333 yes for sure! 😃
You sound like an egotistical time waister 🤔
Who came to the comments immediately???
Great message Tony ! Thanks for the male perspective delivered with love and not degrading!
You’re speaking life into all!❤
Great topic with Excellent delivery!
SO TRUE A very powerful video . Image is SO important in today's world we CANNOT downplay y this . A particular look can be the difference between one life or the other or one opportunity or the next . Fine line . Thank you Mr Gaskin for speaking the truth.
Hey Tony, I love the video. Certain parts you had me rolling, as usual. I like your virtual shopping idea. You should start it. Is dunks a Florida thing?
This was so needed Tony.. i learned alot from this👏🏾
Tony u are cracking me up! 😂😂😂 It’s the truth though. Lord knows I’m trying to look good for my man and most importantly me. I’m gone always be looking good no matter what. It’s so important!
Men dont approach because of the ME TOO MOVEMENT
Thank you for this!!! 💯 💯💯
I am a wardrobe stylist that holds seminars about ‘Personal Style’. What Tony is saying is 1000% true. You HAVE to present yourself to the world in a way that is unique to YOU.
Excellent advice/video for women of all ages in all seasons of life❤ Style can be curated to your taste. It doesn't have to be expensive but it does take time to develop a style that compliments your individuality right where you are. TY
As a woman, I can say that men do approach me in social situations such as parties, but not often out in public unless I am dressed very femininely and have really good energy that day. That being said, I also believe feminist women really dropped the ball on this one. They INSISTED that men absolutely do not approach them in public, that it's creepy, it's weird, that they would publicly shame men if they did, etc...and the men listened. A lot of men I've spoken to have said they would like to approach women but the social ramifications are too big, especially if you live in a progressive neighborhood. Contrary to popular belief, most men aren't creeps and don't like being a bother women. So they'd rather just go on online dating, it feels more anonymous and safe.
Thanks to feminism you as a woman are no longer a second class citizen.
Thanks to feminism you can drive a car and vote and work and get paid the same as a man.
Feminism is not the issue the issue is men approaching women for all the wrong reasons.
If a guy does approach me it's usually for s3x and nothing else.
Also men I'm not interested in dating approach me also.
These men need to stay in their lanes.
Also men only approach the 12 percent of women they deem attractive and they won't approach average looking women.
You must be new here because Tony has address online dating and he is against. You’ve spoken to a lot of men but he is a man.
This is true
@@Machenziethemodel I don’t believe in online dating either! Agree with tony on that one too
I totally agree with you! I hate the logic of some feminist and how they are just complete man haters. I meet a lot nice men that actually appreciate the way I dress or me being a feminine woman. It’s sad mainly with the fact men don’t feel safe and rather go online.
💯 I agree with Tony, but like he also mentioned in previous videos the more you are out and in comfortable cute casual wear it does increase the likelihood of men approaching you in person...I can attest to that as a single mom that have to run a lot of errands and staying active for health...men approach me more with no makeup on and in relaxed/comfy wear
God bless you and your family, thank you for being genuine.
Very good points! ❤Please make more videos like this 🙏🏾 🙂
Tony, you're absolutely right. It's a disconnect. In real life women aren't carrying themselves the way the women on sites like only fans or IG are carrying themselves.
A lot of people in general need styling advice. Some are either too revealing or look like they don’t care to even run a brush through their hair. All of us have off days every blue moon, but my parents always told me not to go outside half stepping. We used to be put on punishment as kids if we went out looking unkept. It’s something that stuck with me and it does make men approach you when you look good and show class
Not “she walks to fast with her head down”. This was so hilarious and educational.😊😂
I need to hear this Tony! Thank you as always for your guidance ❤
Tony said they be in a relationship with Handgela lmaooooo . Rejection is protection ladiesssss 🗣️
My gym trainer saw my photo on my phone's lock scream and he said, "Oh wow you're a catfish." I was very hurt even though I didn't filter the photo it also showed me I have to try a little harder on my day-to-day looks, especially at the gym since that's really the only place I see guys. I find I put more effort into my outfits when I am going out and not so much into my everyday style. My friend told me that my everyday outfits look like I am a happily married woman, not someone who is single and approachable. However, the outfits she suggested are from loosebootie910's favorite store, so I always ignored her. I like the tips Tony gave in this video and look forward to more suggestions because they are practical and basically what I already do but more intentional.
@@genovasquez8361because you need a woman who you think is beneath you.
This was one of the best videos Tony and I’m not even a person who writes messages. This was really really good. Thank you so much
I really appreciate you talking to the ladies. Women now a days do not have a clue. It’s quite unfortunate that many ladies never had a mother to teach them. I am full grown with a 25 year old son. My mother taught me how to be a lady and I can’t believe the climate of the world today. It has never been my desire to have a strange man lusting after me. So many things are just low vibration and lack of discipline. You are truly needed! Thank you
These are some great dressing tips coming from Tony. That's probably why I don't get attention when I'm out, cause of how I dress.
Good points good tips
T. Gaskins thank you for this word!! I need to step my fashion game UP!! I love Mrs. Gaskins style and that really inspired me as a single woman to do better…
Thank you spo much for this info, I love this, keep these videos coming, I'm a senior and share the topic
I agree Tony ..it's how you present yourself. You can be classy without showing your body parts. Confidence is everything..I dare to be different
Bro Tony just gone head and launch the personal stylist website!😄👌🏾👌🏾👌🏾
Brilliantly said brother ❤
Yes you stood out ! Nice attire Tony
So basically a nice way of saying we don’t look good enough 😂 this was tough to hear but I needed to hear this thanks.