Agreed. I lost my mum when I was 21 and dad when I was 23. I’m about to turn 26 next month. I was in such a rush to move out and didn’t treasure the time with them enough.
Wow, I’m 26 and still living at home, and I feel like the biggest loser 😕. I’ve been rushing to get out since I was in my early 20s but never was able to do so. My parents are in their early 50s and I have a brother who’s on the autistic spectrum. I do sometimes believe that God has kept me here for a reason.. especially for my brother. I’ll treasure my time with them and make better use of the time here 💖
I’m 34 and live at home with my mom, my sister, and my niece. Not the life I pictured lol. I have a career and can move out, but I prefer to not live alone.
I’m 33 and I’m still at home with fam. I had my own apartment, but had to move back home last October due to unpleasant living conditions and I have been looking to move out since. I did get a quote for a mortgage, but everything is so high in my area that the quote is laughable. Plus, these houses are looking like the land before time done got to them. I’d spend more money fixing a house so I’m staying my happy behind where I’m at now.
My mom had all of those things by 30 and still ended up having to divorce and get her PhD and reinvent herself and her life in her late 40s (she’s thriving now in her 50s). So there’s never any guarantee in life. Life is change. Like the quote “where things are uncertain, everything is possible.”
There they are. The "I'm a PhD" woman. Yeah, being a PhD will certainly improve your life. It is the PhD, everybody is thankful right before they die🤦♂️ How can you be so delusional?!
@@MLagarde0425 you are 40 with no kids, you don't plan to get married. It is you who got hurt by life. Your feminine side would want to be loved, married and a mother. You are the one hurt not me. Worst case: buy a dog and die alone😉
Likewise, My mom to me have never been happier and she’s currently in her 50’s. I think she’s proud of how far she’s come and wouldn’t change a thing. Even some people in their 70’s are finally enjoying the joys of life during the quiet times.
I’m 31 and finishing my degree. I was married at 26 and we have a son. My husband passed away in March. So I am single and starting again. You never know what life will throw at you but I’ve learned to embrace every step.
Thank you. Being 31, not married, no job, living at home,no kids, I felt like a failure. I compare myself alot to others but this video has really helped me. Thank you.
I'm 32. And this popped up on my feed today. I have my boyfriend who's supporting me right now. No kids, left my toxic job a month and a half ago and still looking. This video spoke my thoughts. The many days I felt like "If I could just crack the code" then my life would take off.
Girl, I’m approaching 40 and just now getting my life “together”. Settling down, finishing school, planning my career. No kids yet, newly married. Life doesn’t come prepackaged. It’s not the same for everyone.
@@kimberleighwells4420 I am 36 no kids or man , you cant decide when you meet the right one. its a bad idea to have kids with someone you not sure about.
I am 27 and starting off in my career. I was previously unemployed and depressed. My peers have achieved a lot. Many have bought house, cars and are married by now. Even though I have nothing I am grateful for the word of God that has kept me going and has kept me grateful for the current season of my life. I remember when I was unemployed and going through a lot but God gave me power to thank him whilst I was in that season. The key is to lean on God and his promises.
looking for this comment. i’m 26, 2 kids, no career other than serving the military for 8 years, financially could be way better but even through all that , i have truth, grace and mercy from TMH GOD. I look at my life and thank him everyday because i could be on my way to destruction unknowingly. it’s like all the glitters are not gold, you can be successful in this life from a worldly point of view but what profits a man to be physically successful and your soul is dead, because in the end all that will be tried and burned if your not right with GOD. i’m happy unfortunate things happened in my life bc i would have NEVER seeked God if didn’t. If everything had of went as i dreamed or desired i would be arrogant, self centered, definitely no kids, full of money and on my way straight to hell. Real shit 💯
@@erikathomas5801 This is so true. Sometimes our blessings lie in our misfortune or rather what we see as being misfortune whereas God has sent that event to redirect us from the 🔥 of hell. Amen sister this is so powerful
It's so funny... I'm sitting here watching this because I'm 30. I have the husband, the house, the kids, and I looked through your channel and thought, "wow, I would really enjoy being single and traveling to Italy..." I even wish I had a parent who I could lean on for support like your mom is helping you. Grass is always greener! All we can do is try to live in the moment and enjoy it for what it is. But if I knew how to do that maybe I wouldn't be bringing videos about feeling like a failure at 30 lol
I learned that as humans we cannot be fully satisfied where we are.I was 29 and told my friend who was pregnant said same.I thought she was content but she wasn’t.She was like girl I envy you …I’m like what
Nobody can have it all. Yeah, you may want to be single and travel to Italy for a month, but in reality I highly doubt you'd trade your life for being single, no kids and no house at your age.
I’m 29 and I’ll be 30 in December and I feel this exact same way! I cried on my birthday because I was grieving the fact that I did not reach certain milestones before this age. I don’t have a degree, I’m not married nor do I have kids yet. My family has been asking when will I find love and have children, and I can’t tell them when because I literally don’t know. Then I see all of my peers (classmates) living what looks like their best life on social media. They’re traveling, they have their own families and they good careers. And yet I’m still single, living on housing assistance for an apartment. I feel completely left behind. I finally started therapy this year and it definitely helped but I would still love to see certain things come to pass in my life. I would love to travel and find my person. It’s a lot to mentally take in and cope with daily but seeing transparent vids like these let’s me know I’m not alone and things will change when it’s the right time.
Stop watching social media. It’s not real and people show a smile and then go cry, hate their lives but work hard to show how perfect their life is. Just love ur life and be happy and grateful for where you are, wherever that is.
Sis the moment you let go of life's conditioning, that's the moment you elevate life. Create your own rules, it's your life not societies. Less is actually more. The quiet moments are more precious than the loud events in life x
Amen Luna! The moment we decide to actually let go of the society's timelines of our own lives, the moment we can start doing things at our own pace and living our lives.
literally me at 32. After traveling extensively I felt like I had nothing to show for it and “behind” everyone else. Fast forward to 34, I’m pregnant, married & headed toward buying. Does this feel more fulfilling ? Not necessarily… traveling was extremely fulfilling. I’m also excited about baby and love my partner. I’m also bored at times & don’t feel like compromising. All these feelings are okay! Happiness isn’t defined by what you have or what milestones you’ve reached. Let the joy you find lead you to where you are supposed to be and I think that’s where the success is. Lastly, life comes at you FAST and can change. Don’t rush it girl ❤
I loved this comment ❤ such good advice and comforting I’m loving 30’s so much it feels fresh and new !!!! I have nothing what society tells me I should have but I feel so free and confident I’m running my own race!!! 20’s was all about comparing and competing with society but not anymore!!
thanks for sharing this video sis. I'm 38 and One thing I learnt in life is that no matter how little, no matter the age it's never too late to get started and having the mindset that every day of your life you're evolving. Life becomes unpleasurable when you add too much pressure. I started my path to reinventing myself a year ago, I’m now living healthier, confident, stronger, making 6 figures, having leisure to enjoy family &friends. I feel happier and living my life for myself . This is to encourage someone “you can start anytime to have a reset it’s worth it! I’m striving to continue growing cus it’s a journey 💗
Change your mindset, read self-help books, expand knowledge, budget and don't spend on impulse, save, take your finances seriously, eat healthy, exercise your body, meditate; the list goes on... I hope it is useful to you.
I learnt to be frugal, minimal on spending, saving and paying myself first through Investing, made Plans, growing passive income, Read a lot of books on finance, followed my plan consistently.
Life doesn’t really start til age 35 relax youngsters 😌 I’m age 36 and just got out a 12 year relationship and starting over but I’m excited for this new journey.
I just turned 30 and I relate to this. I am dealing with huge anxiety 24/7. I developed insomnia because of my worry of being 30 and girls who are younger have it more together. But this week, for some reason I am beginning to learn that God has an astonishing plan for whoever is going through in their 30s.
I relate to everything you said here! It’s amazing to think that we feel very alone but a lot of us are going through the same thing- the anxiety, the insomnia, the worrying about the future. Thank you for sharing and agree that sometimes we just have to give it up to God and believe there is a bigger plan for us. Sending love ❤
I was jealous of those girls, too. But when i look at my friend, 1 year younger than me, 2 kids, single mother, already divorced after 1 year of being married after being cheated on, i kinda enjoy my singlehood for now.( I do not want to make her into the" negative" role model etc. only an example). Actually the opposite, she's a fighter. Problems in life NEVER go away. They only change their forms.
I am forty, just quit my job my own will. I live in the same flat i moved in to when i was 23, and i have no children or spouse. I enjoy the sun, the chirping of the birds and the fact that i am alive. Have no regrets. Life is a gift
@@kunalshah7550 Life is not done, its happening all the time. I write, i go for walks or run, i chat with strangers. Time passes me. Sometimes i am somewhat bored in the evenings, but boredom is a normal feeling. But my biggest trick is to not compare myself to any other persons or lives. When comparisons stop, life becomes more obvious and strikingly unique, as your own experience.
Evamarie I'm 54 years old, I just completed an LPN program at the age of 50 so today I've been a nurse for 3 years. I feel as though I'm living my best life in Him(Christ). I'm contemplating on doing a bridge program for the LPN to RN program. When one feels complete is when you are living in the moment, season, or time. Get a relationship with God. He knows who we are and where we are going.
I'm 33 and literally have nothing!!! I even deleted all my videos on here because I was so ashamed to talk about it. Seeing all these comments makes me feel that I'm not alone. Thank God someone else said it out loud.
I feel the same way as you too. I’m almost 34, still living with my dad, and I’m single with no kids. I sometimes feel like I’m living like a teenager but this video helps me realize I shouldn’t feel this way because I’m not alone. There are plenty others in their 30s who are in our situation. We’re in this together sis!
I'm 35 with my mom...tried living alone and didn't like it....I told my mom im not moving out again until im married....I don't want children...I don't have a man...I see no point in leaving 😂😂😂❤❤❤
@@LoveAlways1002 I don't want kids either but the feeling of wanting to be with a man is killing me slowly ... I know i am pathetic but it's the truth ... I want a man ... Somehow your comment consoled me 😢
For women is different. We don’t have until 50 to have children. The older we get the harder will be to want to have a child. I think that’s mostly the worry here. I am 33 and not married not kids. I am worried bc of this 😭😭😭
@@20vannesa are you actively going to places where you might meet single men or online dating? If you don't do these things it will be hard to meet a man randomly
Because of the student debt & economic downturn it is more people living at home during 30. Nobody should feel any type of way! We didn’t have kids we couldn’t afford and didn’t marry someone we didn’t love to say we have it all. Your journey is uniquely perfect to you.
Im turning 32 in 6 weeks, I dont have a husband or kids - I never had age attached to something beyond my control. Im intentional about being happy. When you complain, you will always find something to complain about, when you choose to be content - you will realise that you have so much more to be grateful for
You’re not alone, I will be 30 next year and I’m still trying to figure it out…while also living with my mom. Take those social media breaks when you need to. We got this girl!
I turn 30 next year too and sometimes wish I lived with my mom😂. I feel like we all want things we don't currently have but in reality we already have them we just haven't caught up to that reality yet. We just have to enjoy the journey!like Eva said...we can't focus on the long term goals its all about the now✨✨🌷🌸
Same! No career, but a passion and a very good man. Debt and not a lot of money and still living with parents😂 Glad I'm not alone. But we can do it! It will be okay. I'm trying to think about it like a marathon: when you fall behind, you don't just stop. You take a deep breath and try your best to reach that finish line.
With all due respect can you tell me your remedy? I am in my 30’s and feel lost at times. And when I read your comment I got so much admiration for your mindset.
It is a privilege to live with (a) parent(s). I'm 35, same boat except mom passed away last week and dad died years earlier. No sibblings or family around. I had a very different vision with my life, being a caregiver both boosts and destroys your esteem. On one had, you feel useful but on the other you've sacrificed yourself (financially, emotionally, professionally, socially) to watch your loved one who passed away inspite of your efforts to care for them. Social media is fake fake fake.
I experienced the same things in my late 20s. I’m almost in my mid 30s now and some of the worries don’t go away even when you achieve the “status quo” life there will always be something else to worry about. So for me it’s all about perspective. I choose to look at things that I have achieved and how far I’ve come, rather than things I’m yet to achieve. I remind myself and thank God for air in my lungs, a roof over my head and having close family and friends. Great video 👍🏾
Yeah, I agree that changing perspective is important and something I’m working on! Better to be grateful for the things we’ve done and have than to be worried about things we haven’t done or don’t have.
Something im starting to realise Is that It’s okay to live an ordinary life, without kids or marriage. There’s nothing wrong with not being a millionaire or famous Being ordinary is okay I realised this while watching Master of None season 3
It doesn't make mathematical sense to push every young person to be the next Hollywood star, the next president, the next ceo of a groundbreaking company or the next einstien. It's less than 1% of people that get those kinds of successes. It's not probably or feasible to expect that.
@@fcasias7 there is a pressure by parents and society especially as the eldest daughter and south Asian 🙃 like idk if AI will take over our jobs by the time we graduate (late cuz I just said YOLO and travelled abroad for a year cuz I kinda made weird decisions also Corona happened lol) like will data analytics data science exist in 4yrs uncertain times worst part it feels like even my cousin's and classmates are living their lives like wtf? 👀😭
I’m 25, bilingual, have a college degree and worked full-time overseas in a lucrative career for 4 years and I’ve had rich “friends” talk down to me and imply that I’m a loser because I took the last year partly off by working part-time as a teacher and pursuing a psychology degree. The messed up part? I believed them for a hot minute. The point I’m trying to make is it doesn’t matter how “successful” you are; there are always dissatisfied people who will try to pull you down to make themselves feel better. Once you get infected with that mindset, you’ll never see yourself as being enough. What I’ve learned so far? Your happiness is the most important. Live your life how you want.
I'm 29, will be turning 30 in January. Throughout my teenage years I also imagined all sorts of achievements: graduating university somewhere abroad, I'm from Central Asia and I've always dreamed studying in U.S; finding a good job; moving out of my parent's house at 25; maybe getting married somewhere along the way. But here I am, I've quit university twice due to severe depression; have no job and I still live of off my parents. Sometimes I feel so ashamed and so useless. I understand that I'm being a burden to my parents, and I also know that I'm truly blessed with my family. Right now I'm trying get myself together. I've decided to get back to university and graduate in 3 years. Moreover, I have a very supportive boyfriend and I'm just endlessly grateful to him. Watching this video made me feel a lot better, because even though I try to convince myself that I'm not alone, I haven't seen anyone around me who'd been struggling the same way I did. Thank you for this video))
I am 32 , currently living alone, not financially stable, not a permanent employee, trying to make end meets. I am very grateful that I don't have kids since I will not be able to support them. I am holding on to the fact that I am working hard to have a better life, a house of my own, and savings. That's my ultimate goal.
31 years old, I quit my job because of the stress it brought along. Saved some money and next week going to Croatia for a month. Not much of a plan what to exactly do there apart from walking and reading. Feeling constant the pressure I put on myself for missing a lot in my twenties and want to make up with that. I really understand you, I hope we both can find peace and rest in our hearts in the future.
I hope for the same and I hope that some time away in Croatia will let you find some answers that you’re looking for. For what it’s worth, I think walking and reading is as good a plan as any. Sometimes, we need to stop trying to do anything and just let things figure themselves out. At least that’s what I’m trying to do.
I have a feeling you probably met your soulmate in Croatia 😊... If not that's still okay, I guess I've just heard way to many stories of it playing out that way. My apologies
* update* No unfortunately still haven't found my soulmate. After Croatia hiked a lot in Norway. Now one year later trying with my jobcoach to find a suitable job. Which maybe is European Tree Worker, totall different field than before (graphic/ print operator).
I am 36 years old, a single parent, and I’ve felt so much pressure being on social media because people are constantly showing off and I’m not where they are yet. I had to deactivate my instagram. I can totally relate!
I stopped posting to family in high school 😂 so the last thing most of them know I graduated from high school. I got my degree. I’m going back to school soon. I’m having my first kid and getting married. Will be buying a house within the next few years. I’m 26…. It’s tough in these streets. Idc what they think… we’re all really not doing the same things. They have no idea who I really am ❤
This is literally what I’ve been going through. I’ve been 30 for almost three months and I live at home with my mom and sisters, I sleep in a twin bed because my sister and I share a room, I’m not married, I have no kids, I work at a job that I don’t like and I can’t tell you how embarrassed and ashamed I feel because I think I’m falling behind in life.
I am 29 living with my parents and two sisters, I started nursing school last year and I am graduating soon , single no kids . Don’t loose hope …. U r not alone ❤❤❤
I can totally relate to this comment... I finished my first degree and served at 25+ but feeling unfulfilled cos I want to go to school of nursing... Went back to school of nursing immediately after service. I am 27 now, feel late/left behind.
At 26, rapidly approaching 27 I am just now learning to embrace my slow and quiet life. I always imagined that I’d be in a much different place in my life than I am currently. Rather than shaming myself for not being who I imagined I’d be at this age I am just trying everyday to be present & full of gratitude. Life doesn’t end when 30 comes and I’m not behind, just going at my own pace.
I didn't become financially independent until I was in my late 30's, and I'm still in my 30's. In addition to having purchased my second home and earning money on a monthly basis through passive income, I've also achieved three out of five goals. I just hope this inspires someone to realize that it doesn't matter if you don't have any of these things yet, you can start today no matter your age. Change your future by investing! I made a rather big decision by investing in the financial market.
I agree with you and I believe that the secret to financial stability is having the right investment ideas to enable you earn more money, I don’t know who agrees with me but either way I recommend either real estate or bitcoin and stocks..
@@face2lune Understanding your financial needs and making effective decisions is very essential. If I could advise you, you should seek the help of a financial advisor. For the record, working with one has been the best for my finances...
I’m Glad i stumbled on this. Please, if its not too much of a hassle for you, can you drop the details of the CFP that assisted you and how to get in touch….
NO cap...just before i turned 30, i literally had your exact same circumstances. No job, no dates, no money. In addition to feeling like a failure, the 2009 housing market depression happened around the world and half my friends lost their jobs. It was sort of like 2020 pandemic. Anyway, i celebrated my 30th birthday, found a job, then an apartment and moved out of my parents home. by 33 I was married and doing great. I'm 45 and still doing great. Trust me. Life can turn in your favor in a heartbeat. Keep grinding. What is for you and WHO is for you is out there right now seeking you just as hard as you are seeking it. You got this.
Girl I’m 36 and I totally feel you. It’s normal to feel this way but let me telll you. 30 is still young. You have time to go for it. Start today, it’s not too late, but don’t delay
You're the only person telling her to exercise personal responsibility by actually applying herself to accomplish the things she wants instead of settling for a life of mediocrity.
As someone who has gone through (and is still going through) almost the exact same steps as you have (graduated, worked for a bit then lived in Italy, moved back, no career, no family, no house, no idea where I want to live), I completely 100% agree with you on all these points. As 27-35 year-olds, we 're stuck between 2 generations: raised by a generation that defines success as "grow up, graduate, have a stable career and a family" and we're living with a generation that defines success as "grow up, have flexibility, and change as often as possible". I still struggle with feeling like I have fallen behind or failed, sometimes, but the best advice my dad ever gave me was, "No matter how old you get, or how much time has passed, remember that this is your life and no one else's. The right thing will happen for you at the right time, so don't waste time trying to follow someone's else's dream or feeling bad that you haven't met society's expectations. Live your life, enjoy every single second of it, and prepare, and when your time comes, excel at it!"
Your dad gave you some really great advice! It’s so amazing though, that the “enjoying your life” part can be the most difficult, especially since we are between two generations, but it’s the most important. And patience is truly a virtue! ☺️
I feel the same way. I’m 35 no kids not married I just lost my dad. I’m in a relationship that is not the best. I am working on my peace and joy. So I isolate myself a lot. I just want time to my self
I'm 36yrs, no child and not married. Worked as a teacher for the past 12yrs now and I'm behind financially but I have told myself that my dreams, goals, visions and aspirations are not tied to my age. I keep working on myself and building myself without having to compare my life to anyone.
I was there! 30 starting out in a new career renting a house. Then I went through a divorce at 34. Thankfully no kids involved but to pay for everything I had to move in with my parents and go back to square one! I never gave up! Bought my own house found a new girlfriend who is now my fiancée. I just landed a job as a director. Just a few years ago it felt like I was a failure even older than 30! Now I’m 38 and my life is much better. Circumstances change but just keep the drive to move forward and things will get better
I AM 43 and resonate with allllllllll of this! I spent my 20s and 30s chasing dreams and saying NO to what everyone else was doing…chasing dreams with no plans of not achieving them…at 43, I wish I was way more rational/logical…at 43 I have not a clue of what I AM doing day to day, just took my 2nd leap of faith, this time with nothing to cover me, but I asked for guidance and I did as I was guided to do! I continue to tap in and ask for guidance daily…and for continuous faith 🙏🏽
Hey ! I just want to let you know that sometimes it is still better to try follow a dream and say you tried ! I know that may sound cheesy or cliche ! But it shows your sense of motivation and character ! And imagine you chose the logical and rational life ! I 100% guarantee you would probably have been unfulfilled and commented here that you wish you would have at least tried following your dreams ! Regret of not doing something is always bigger ! I am nearly 29 and trust me I am still seeing just how youthful your 40s is ! Do not give up please !! You have this ! Today is a new day I am rooting for you !!! ❤
I’m sitting at the hair dresser crying while watching this video. I’ll be 28 a week from today. I feel like I’m losing my friends that have been there for me my entire life, still live at home, can’t drive, never been in a serious relationship and not making as much money as I want. I feel upset or depressed almost every weekend. I feel like everything is spiraling out of control and being taken away from me. I know all that I’m working towards will all come in time and what’s important is that I’m taking the necessary steps to get there. Thank you for making me feel like I’m not alone. 🙌🏻
You most definitely aren’t alone . I can relate to alot of this . Life is making room for what’s next for you . Every step of the journey really is a building block for your future siccuess so try to enjoy the moment love . Your feelings are valid , but we all are doing the best we can with our circumstances. I know you will have the happy life that you deserve . I hope things are getting better and you feel seen and heard . Keep going sweetheart 💚💫
Well, you can learn to drive, there are schools out there that teach driving. Turning 28 is a tough age. I remember it well, it is when I ditched everything and moved across the country to start over. You can change your life if you want. Even consider a seasonal job (coolworks is a good website) to just get yourself out of your rut and comfort zone.
You're not alone...I'm 35 single no kids still living at home. I've tried tons of dating apps and I'm not a big social butterfly due to social anxiety. I'm so exhausted and just don't have the energy to keep trying.
Girllll I feel you on feeling like you have no energy to keep on trying. I’m 25 years old and just got a masters and now feel like I’m tossed in adulting. And it’s so overwhelming and scary. Like I thought I was a confident person, but I’ve been experiencing so much social anxiety, performance anxiety, and depression. I feel like I’m living 2 different lives. One that people see and my actually thoughts and feelings, that no one really sees. But I’m learning that community helps. Not shutting people out and slowly letting people in to see the realer and truer you. We can do hard things!! So Holly Chen I see you and hear you❤
I’m 43. No kids, husband, living in poverty and my career is at a standstill cuz of depression & becoming my brother’s caregiver. I feel so behind and embarrassed.
How your feel is so normal. But you can start by going to therapy, mapping out what will make you happy and following that path patiently. Also another family member can care for your brother. The burden doesn't have to be all on you. Good luck, you will make it through. 40s is still young.
I also struggle with depression. Today I did an at home palates class via streaming. Physical activity is key to lifting depression. Good luck and stay encouraged!
From the bottom of my heart, thank you for this video. It helped save my life. I had thoughts of ending my life. It's been 9 months since my breakup with my ex of 8 years and engaged. I have no job, didn't finish high school (trying to now), can't drive, no friends and living at home with my parents and students. I feel like a failure and a loser. But this helped me realize we are not alone and everyone is on a different timeline. It's been hard but praying and hoping that I will make it and have a better life.
@@monicawanjikumwaura6689the economy and false american dream failed us. Not to mention toxic workplaces that has alot of us flocking to solo spaces to make our money. Its slow money tho
Same here Sis. Been having countless of breakdowns over the past few months until I came across this video, which wasn't a coincidence I believe. And reading the comments just lifted so much off of my shoulders...
I feel like you should make a group of all of us in the comments so we can check in and make sure everyone is ok. You aren’t behind. I got diagnosed with adhd after school, still figured that out and realised the 30% rule. Of age with adhd is true for me. So my actual age is 21.7 currently and that’s how I’m counting now. I have a new respect for myself and realised the major 2nd chance I just got at life. I’m grateful. You should be too. Realisation is the first step.
Thank you for this. I recently quit my job and I’m moving to Italy in 3 days. I have no plan, no friends, and no job. I’m so scared but also so excited to finally have a chance to reset abs get away from the hustle culture in the U.S.
Aww I hope you enjoy your time in Italy! It can be an adjustment but with patience it’s really such a wonderful place to live. It helped me learn to slow down a bit more.
May God comfort all of the 30s in the comments section feeling this way too. I'm way younger(Only 23) but I realise that there is no reason to put unnecessary pressure on myself and I can use all of you as my point of reference. Hold on to the fact that when the time is right, God will make it happen for you. Life is not linear and you can never know when what is going to happen, just live in the moment and be grateful for every moment in life. Love Thato Olga ❣
I'm 24 and i also feel pressured. I have a job, a car and a supportive mother but some of those who went to varsity with me are getting married/engaged/buying houses/having babies And I've never felt so behind in life. And social media makes it worse.
That's a very positive way to put it, considering the gap it represents. This is the way to go about ourselves. We're only so young, God's timing is the best❤️🔥
I'm in the same boat. Had to move back home after a failed engagement and find it difficult at times not to look in the mirror and see failure. I have no kids, no home of my own, no significant other, and a job that pays somewhat decent but not enough to live on my own. I will be 35 in 3 months and I most definitely have nothing together...but I've learned that this is exactly where I needed to be in life, unfortunately. I wasn't ready for marriage and kids. The universe knew. I can change my situation but first I have some things to work on within myself. I don't allow people to tell me where I should be in life anymore due to my age. I now make my own rules and feel so much better mentally/emotionally. I just remind myself that timing is everything. What I desire I will receive ✨️
You are saying exactly what im feeling! I turned 30 yesterday and the night before, I broke down crying because I hadnt accomplished enough. I rent a room, and work a high school diploma level job, after earning a masters degree that hasnt done much for my career without relevant experience, plus I'm single. I am working toward better but these student loans make me feel like I'm drowning! May our 30s and beyond be much better in Jesus name. This is temporary!
Thank you for making this video, it was recommended to me randomly by the algorithm. I'm 31, soon to be 32 living at home with my parents, no job, no relationship, no children and I feel like an enormous failure. I never thought this would happen to me either, but here I am. Thank you for sharing your story, I needed this 🙏🏼❤
I’m 33 and this does cross my mind ALOT cause society do put pressure on you but I learned a lot of people barely making it to be 30 so I found the blessing in appreciating getting old and just living figuring things out as I go and not compare myself to others we got this girl keep pushing
I'm 33 i sometimes feel that same way i work in retail and still live with my mom. But then again some people i know married got kids have it all together still complain they are not happy. I mean yeah i do get lonely sometimes since alot of people my age are married. But I'll say I'm lucky i have a job and a roof over my head and a few friends to talk to. And you never know a person that may have it all could have it gone as well.
I feel you on this so much! I’m 31, I thought I’d be done having kids by now but a baby is still not even close. Career wise, I’m jumping from job to job because I struggle to find my path(I can’t afford to have kids). It’s a very sad feeling and sometimes I feel like giving up on everything but I have faith there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. I pray we all achieve our dreams and find true happiness x
Its a different time from when our parents were 30! They were older than us millennials. For a lot of us kids don't make sense until about 30 so youre on time. Thank God you have options.
@@9188jennihaving options? Getting pregnant on a natural way above the age of 30 is getting harder and harder. And you know, being 30, no partner, getting pregnant with a person you fully trust takes at least 3 years. Then you are 33 at that point at best. You ladies live your lifes differently than your mothers, but your biological clock ticks at the same speed. Please don't forget that.
As a 32-year-old, we millennials were raised with a playbook that doesn't apply to reality. We were told to do x, y, and z and voila we'd have "a decent life" by simply "just trying", then social media compounded extremely rare living experiences and the hyper-wealthy as now "achievable for anyone" if you just "try hard enough" - like, worst mixture for us. Delaying or forgoing marriage, childbirth, living at home, or working a job that makes us unhappy or underpays us or BOTH are totally normal experiences. So many of us have the same exact experience. Just chase the things that make you happy and lean into love when you find it, and you'll be okay. We're all in it together.
Love this! I’m 32, I thought I was going to get engaged this year after a 2.5 year relationship. Didn’t happen. I thought I was going to be a successful business owner in home staging didn’t happen. My life has turned a different direction for the good. I am now moving back home to atlanta, to build generational wealth and travel around the world until my heart desire. Things don’t always go as planned but that’s the beauty of the journey.
I'm in the same situation. 29 about to be 30 in a few weeks. No career, not married, no kids, I feel like there's no point in even trying to do anything anymore. I'm feeling more and more hopeless the closer I get to turning 30. I've spent my 20s struggling with depression and anxiety, eating my problems. I really wish I could change how I've lived my life.
29 is so YOUNG! There is no way you should give into that feeling of not trying anymore. Pls keep going after your goals so you don't look back at 40 in regret.
I just turned 29 and felt this HEAVY. Especially with being financially insecure and not knowing where to find peace. I am grateful to have a partner that helps keep me motivated to move forward but it's very hard.
I'm 31 and still living at home. It wasn't till I was 29 did I start a career for myself and I remember being so happy because I finally felt like I was "catching up" to my peers. It took time for me to realize that everyone's life is different and like you said "social media isn't real". I had to shift my perspective and realize that yes, I might still live with my parents but i'm saving money and when it's time for me to leave i'll be financially secure. Every now and then I still feel the societal pressure to be further ahead in life, and that's okay as long as I don't allow myself to sit in those feelings for to long. Thank you for sharing this video :)
I can completely relate to the message of this video. I’m turning 30 in 52 days and I feel sometime like a failure. As an African man, I was expected from my family to have my own family house and stability in my late 20s as my dad and uncle did. Getting that pressure every time, especially from family members and comparing me to my friends who have got engaged or married and had kids recently. In my case, I had to start everything from scratch when I moved to the US, and I have the feeling it’s so complicated to get into a stable and long term relationship in this country. All those feelings make me just avoid celebrating my birthdays every year, or not attend events or celebrations with my community (from my country) here in my town because they tend to compare people’s accomplishments, check on your life in an intrusive way. Thank you for sharing this with us, you just got a new follower .
I’m sorry but I read this and I would suggest stop putting so much weight on their opinion. It’s not that serious that you stop celebrating your bday please
Timing is everything, when the right time comes and we work, pray and stick to the goals, we will surely get there and achieve it more better and greater. Don't give up now. God has a way of turning things around
Im so hurt, 35 and I feel so behind. I live with my mom who is not supportive and anytime I get a leg up she tries to guilt trip me. Im so tired, went on vacation for the first time on my own and came back home to my mom stating I made her depressed because I traveled. I have tried multiple times to move but always end up back. No kids, home, life. Im so sad inside and when I do state I am disappointed in myself, no one wants to listen to me because its negative. Watching this video does help but it still hurts.
OMG - this is like watching myself like 5-6 years ago (I´m 36 now). I didn´t meet my boyfriend until I was 30. I though I´d have children by 24 years old. My first child was born when I was 32. My career is still a rollercoaster it feels. I wish more people would share their actual stories so it would´nt feel like such a failure when we don´t reach the certain milestones by a certain age. Everyone´s journey is unique - I just wish we saw the uniqueness in social media! Thank you for sharing your reflections and story
Yeah but at least you have a child! women are different. We don’t have until 50 to have children. The older we get the harder will be to want to have a child. I think that’s mostly the worry here. I am 33 and not married not kids. I am worried bc of this 😭😭😭 I want a child soooo bad
I'm 25 years old now, couple months ago I was going through something like a quarter-life crisis. I was feeling so behind in life, but work on myself has helped me. I know that everything what's going to meant to be it's gonna happen at the right time, I don't need to rush. It's much beautiful when you enjoy your life journey without the fear to "have it together" already.
I'm 34 and have everything I've always dreamed of and I'm very happy. But I didn't have a traditional 20s, I did all the "wrong" things. I became a mom at 20, dropped out of college got divorced young etc. All the things that my friends feared, avoided and often used me as an example of a cautionary tale 😏. Despite things not working out for me 100% of the time, they did work out for me by the time I was 30. I know it's not the path most people would like to have for their lives but I didn't choose misfortune, I chose to keep going and keep building. Good luck.
Hi! I saw this and I had to comment. So I’m thirty this year going on 31 and I’m one of the people that left home at 17, traveled, graduated and couldn’t find a job in my career, traveled some more, lived at home with my parents at 24-25 traveled and became an expat, then finally got my career on track. So now I’ve been blessed with the experiences and the career and I’m on my second engagement. The first fell through because of distance but the second one is a different beast and I’m at a crossroads. On one end people are shaming me for NOT being married (even though I’ve had a wildly successful and fun life NO social media) and others shame me for not having kids. Ironically, I’ve chosen not to have either at this point in my life and it has made a tremendous difference. I like to live without regrets and if If I feel like I would regret not having an experience, I need to try that thing. All of this to say, enjoy your journey. They will shame you regardless. Society is never content. It’s all about who has more and who does more. This is why I have no social and I barely talk to friends or family. Run your race and enjoy your life! It’s your canvas. Paint it how you see fit. I’ve made peace with never being married and if that’s the case I’ll become an expat and live off grid and create art for a living. Tell your story and make your mark!
I am 40 years old ,no money,no job, not married,no house of my own, living in my father's house,my sister feeds me.Sometimes i just wonder.God I thank you for greater days ahead.
I'm 35,single ,no kids and now graduating from Medical School. My siblings will always tell me to stop chasing my big dreams ( because I quit my job as a nurse and started all over again at 30) , and settle down and have kids.Although I'm sometimes moved by what they say, and wanting to be in a relationship or get married, a huge part of me is satisfied with my present state and I keep telling myself that ,this life I have is about me to live and not about society's standards.I'm happy with my choices and I'm content now.That's all that matters . Worrying about what will be has never yielded any fruit in anyones life.I've learnt to take one day at a time ,and enjoy the moment as it present itself .
This is literally me. I just turned 26 but one thing that God has taught me through this long season is that just because your life is not going as conventional and linear as you wanted doesn’t mean your failing or falling behind. The word I kept getting is your right where your supposed to be, trust God that you will get there. Everybody has different journeys and with that comes different timelines and paths. People have looked at me and told be I’m blessed in my current situation. I believe we just have to enjoy the present moment, acknowledge that our circumstances are temporary, life is always unfolding. Also, to try not to compare ourselves. Life is truly a process and it’s to enjoy and endure. Thanks for being real and sharing 😊
Just stumbled across your video and can relate at 37, as I‘m working on a second degree and don’t have much going on. The only balance I have is working out,otherwise I‘d break down. There aren’t many friends around (all married etc.), I often feel like a lonesome Cowboy riding through the savannah, am often procrastinating and feel the outside pressure daily. It really gets lonely for me so often. But I know,things will get easier once I graduated, as hard as it gets. Thanks for the uplifting words,Miss Solanges:) Will return to this video for a while
I turned 30 3 weeks ago I still feel like I'm 22 I don't have kids nor married or even dating 😫 And my career has been all over the place constantly getting laid off.
Social media just sucks the joy out of people enjoying the journey to hitting their milestones. The pace varies from person to person. I honestly feel for you. Comparison makes it hard to be content and happy with your current position in your life.
This is why I don’t use most social media and am careful with what I follow. This is so sad that ppl are having mental breakdowns over not having kids or being married at 30. Start with yourself and work on the stuff you can accomplish. Start with self care and financial growth. It’ll give you confidence for the next challenge on your journey!
That’s right. I teach my patients this exact thing in my therapy sessions. Fasting from social media, detaching from toxic people, and getting closer to God/ Jesus are the top coping skills that my patients use that work.
You’re totally not alone. I’m 35, no kids, I’m a solo entrepreneur and realtor and still figuring things out as I go. I definitely have thoughts at times that I’m further behind than I should be, but guess what? I travel, have fallen in love and gone to several music festivals across the country and am finding more and more things to be grateful about. I’ve found that when I decided to make my own rules and not fit myself into a box created by societal standards, I’ve been more happy and take on life one day at a time.
@@Ruba-v1i You haven't given a reason for why you're scared of hitting 30, so quit your ageism, because it seems like you terrified of hitting 30 just because you'll be older, not because something will go awfully wrong at 30. You don't know how your life is going to be like at 30 yet, you're only 18, so why would you be terrified of hitting 30 specifically? Your 20s are closer, why aren't you terrified of it? What about turning 25? It just sounds like plain ageism to me.
Wow I’m 29 as well I feel this . Societies pressures, some of the mistakes I have made , some of the joys etc . May God bless us with the desires of our hearts and change our perspective
One thing ive learnt is that no matter what plans we have for our lives, life itself gives no shits and will take you where its going to take you. I'm only a few months away from being 34. It was only last year i quit my 10 year banking 'career' and started working at a pet store. Best decision ive made. I thought id have kids by now, i dont. My life isnt how i imagined it, but it is the way it is meant to be. I think we all feel behind, but true freedom comes when you realize that there isnt anywhere to go so you are never behind.
I have House, husband, 2 kids and a job but what I want the most is some personal time for myself! It is exhausting to ‘have it all’. I am typing this with no make up on and I haven’t eaten anything all day today let alone take a bath. Enjoy this time while it lasts!!!
So raw and honest. You are so brave, powerful and inspiring! Everyone struggles with this. You can be 46, 52, 67 and still feel this way. You are absolutely correct about social media creating this pressure. This video blessed me. ✨🙌🏾
Aww thank you! ☺️ I’m so glad you liked the video. And about feeling this way at any age, I’m seeing more and more that this is true. I think life is a process of constantly figuring out what you want and adjusting.
This video popped up for me randomly. I'm 37 now and I remember these feelings showing up for me at 30! At 33, I moved halfway across the US from NYC to Texas alone to have a fresh start in spite of ppl around me saying not to. It was the scariest thing to leave everything I knew but I would do again because of the person I am becoming. I gave up all social media because of comparisons, see my therapist every 2 weeks and learning to enjoy my life in the ways I want and not living by societal rules/expectations. Live life by your own terms and give yourself grace always! ✨️
Please never feel embarrassed about living with your parents, My mum died when I was 23 and my dad isn't in my life either if I can give you one piece of advice is that your a beautiful young woman and you will get where you want to be in your life cherish the time you have with your mom because life goes so quicky all the best to you x
I'm sorry for your loss 😢 I went through the same thing. I lost my mum at 23, my dad isn't in my life either. I agree people should feel blessed to have parents in their life and even the option to move back in with family until they get themselves back together.
Oh sweet summer child 😜 Exactly how I felt at 25, 30, 35, & now 40 😂 The feeling doesn’t go away, even though at 25 I had an art degree & was having a blast with my friends, at 30 I’d written a novel & met my future husband, at 35 I’d won writing awards & got married, and now at 40 I finally realized that being an author is my calling & career goal. Now we travel the country in a converted cabin-van and I’m about to publish 3 more books. Sure, no house yet (ha!) but we travel. No kids but don’t want em. No cat, but want one. Am I happy? Most days 😉 You never know where life will lead, but if you have a passion, joy, or focus (even if it’s just a seed) then you’ll point yourself in that direction without even realizing.
I turned 30 at the beginning of this year, but I've felt lost since 2020, which coincides with the pandemic. My biggest problem is that I never wanted to get married, have kids, or have a home. All I wanted was to live with uncertainty, travel, and enjoy not knowing what awaits me tomorrow. But even that kind of a path takes having money, which I never did. Plus, I quickly realized that although many do that, traveling as a woman is never as safe as when you're a man. Then I fell in love and got married. However, I'm not happy. I achieved that big milestone that society wanted me, and I love my husband, but I'm miserable. So, the goal is to be true to yourself. Do what makes you happy, not what you think would make others approve of your decisions and lifestyle. And be sure you know what you genuinely want in this life and what our society and its expectations convinced you that you should wish to.
You are not alone. I am turning 30 in 10 days and feeling the same. It's funny they say if you want to make God laugh tell him your project😅. We've planned almost the same thing before 30 but still here, healthy and alive are the weathiest things 🎉
We're all this thing together. It's a journey, not a race. Times aren't what they used to be compared to our parents' generation. They'll be bad days but we keep moving forward. 💛
I’m about to be 37 and I’ve felt this way a long time. People tell me to get out there but they don’t realize I already have and I’m exhausted. I feel so alone and I dread every day. I try to hope but can’t deny my utter disappointment. I haven’t been in a serious relationship and feel like I’ll be alone forever and I’m getting too tired to fight for what I want. My mom passed last year and so I have gotten hugged but I honestly don’t feel anything but alone.
When it seems like nothing is going your way and it never will go your way, it may be best to stop focusing inwardly and look outwardly. Shift from what you can do for yourself and focus on what you can do for others. Being in the service of others just might be the thing to breathe new life into you.
I’m in my mid 30’s now. I just got myself a great job that I love and looking into building a house. All by myself. Still haven’t done the whole husband and kids thing yet. I’m focussing on myself first. 😊
Yeah but for women is different. We don’t have until 50 to have children. The older we get the harder will be to want to have a child. I think that’s mostly the worry here. I am 33 and not married not kids. I am worried bc of this 😭😭😭 I want a child soooo bad
@@20vannesa That's true. But most men who 'wait until 50' - we're talking 99.9% - aren't going to have a kid either. If you want a baby, there are other routes besides marrying someone you don't actually love (or who doesn't love you) just for the sake of having a kid.
Thank you for this! I turn 27 in a few weeks and that’s how I feel about it. It’s a weird thing getting older and you don’t think you’re where you should be. We put so much pressure on ourselves
I'm 27 and like this: no home (of my own), no husband, no kids, no career... (I'm almost hitting the wall - the 3.0), but I don't feel happy for not being the only one, bc I wish everyone was fulfilled in life. I hope everyone here feeling empty, stuck and lost find their way and be happy. God bless you all 🙏🏻❤️
I was feeling like this at 22-24 lol I lost my mom 2019 & it knocked me heavily into spirituality.. I learned how to sit in peace & appreciate who I am.
This message definitely resonated with me. The fact that our whole generation feels like this, lets me know that we are all on a collective journey of healing ourselves and breaking boundaries of what life could be.
Never feel bad for living at home, it’s a privilege to save and parents won’t live forever so you’ll love those memories with her later.
Agreed. I lost my mum when I was 21 and dad when I was 23. I’m about to turn 26 next month. I was in such a rush to move out and didn’t treasure the time with them enough.
Wow, I’m 26 and still living at home, and I feel like the biggest loser 😕. I’ve been rushing to get out since I was in my early 20s but never was able to do so. My parents are in their early 50s and I have a brother who’s on the autistic spectrum. I do sometimes believe that God has kept me here for a reason.. especially for my brother. I’ll treasure my time with them and make better use of the time here 💖
I’m 34 and live at home with my mom, my sister, and my niece. Not the life I pictured lol. I have a career and can move out, but I prefer to not live alone.
I’m 33 and I’m still at home with fam. I had my own apartment, but had to move back home last October due to unpleasant living conditions and I have been looking to move out since. I did get a quote for a mortgage, but everything is so high in my area that the quote is laughable. Plus, these houses are looking like the land before time done got to them. I’d spend more money fixing a house so I’m staying my happy behind where I’m at now.
💔❤️🩹❤️🔥
My mom had all of those things by 30 and still ended up having to divorce and get her PhD and reinvent herself and her life in her late 40s (she’s thriving now in her 50s). So there’s never any guarantee in life. Life is change. Like the quote “where things are uncertain, everything is possible.”
Couldn’t said it any better. I’m 40 with no kids. Not planning to ever get marry. Planing to start my PhD next year.
There they are. The "I'm a PhD" woman.
Yeah, being a PhD will certainly improve your life. It is the PhD, everybody is thankful right before they die🤦♂️
How can you be so delusional?!
@@EllHuron Who hurts you?
@@MLagarde0425 you are 40 with no kids, you don't plan to get married.
It is you who got hurt by life. Your feminine side would want to be loved, married and a mother.
You are the one hurt not me.
Worst case: buy a dog and die alone😉
Likewise, My mom to me have never been happier and she’s currently in her 50’s. I think she’s proud of how far she’s come and wouldn’t change a thing. Even some people in their 70’s are finally enjoying the joys of life during the quiet times.
Your life can literally change overnight. Do not put so much pressure on yourself. Enjoy the journey.
Amen❤️🔥 Say it louder!
But it doesn't💔
Very true Whitney
Right ❤
Right, trust the process!
I’m 31 and finishing my degree. I was married at 26 and we have a son. My husband passed away in March. So I am single and starting again. You never know what life will throw at you but I’ve learned to embrace every step.
Sorry for your loss. May God’s Grace be with you everyday🎆
I’m so sorry :(
I’m so sorry for your loss 😢 You are a strong woman ❤ He’s with you every step of the way, guiding you. Sending you my condolences 💐 & hugs 🫂
Sorry for your loss. I will keep you in my prayers.
Thank you. Being 31, not married, no job, living at home,no kids, I felt like a failure. I compare myself alot to others but this video has really helped me. Thank you.
That was me a year ago.. Got a job i kinda like it but the pressure is too big. 😢
I'm 32. And this popped up on my feed today. I have my boyfriend who's supporting me right now. No kids, left my toxic job a month and a half ago and still looking. This video spoke my thoughts. The many days I felt like "If I could just crack the code" then my life would take off.
I swear to you, You are so worthy. ❤
I'm 32 also no kids not married and also living with my parents with no job. Trust me you're not alone.
Some of us have disabilities and don’t get to have things in life.
Girl, I’m approaching 40 and just now getting my life “together”. Settling down, finishing school, planning my career. No kids yet, newly married. Life doesn’t come prepackaged. It’s not the same for everyone.
How do you find out what you like to do for a career? Like I like everything so I can’t see myself doing one career for the rest of my life
Keep trying and pushing: take the next step: walk by faith.
I’m sorry but no kids “yet”?😅girrl you’re 40 lol.
@@kimberleighwells4420 many women are having kids later now
@@kimberleighwells4420 I am 36 no kids or man , you cant decide when you meet the right one. its a bad idea to have kids with someone you not sure about.
I am 27 and starting off in my career. I was previously unemployed and depressed. My peers have achieved a lot. Many have bought house, cars and are married by now. Even though I have nothing I am grateful for the word of God that has kept me going and has kept me grateful for the current season of my life. I remember when I was unemployed and going through a lot but God gave me power to thank him whilst I was in that season. The key is to lean on God and his promises.
Same here
looking for this comment. i’m 26, 2 kids, no career other than serving the military for 8 years, financially could be way better but even through all that , i have truth, grace and mercy from TMH GOD. I look at my life and thank him everyday because i could be on my way to destruction unknowingly. it’s like all the glitters are not gold, you can be successful in this life from a worldly point of view but what profits a man to be physically successful and your soul is dead, because in the end all that will be tried and burned if your not right with GOD. i’m happy unfortunate things happened in my life bc i would have NEVER seeked God if didn’t. If everything had of went as i dreamed or desired i would be arrogant, self centered, definitely no kids, full of money and on my way straight to hell. Real shit 💯
@@erikathomas5801 This is so true. Sometimes our blessings lie in our misfortune or rather what we see as being misfortune whereas God has sent that event to redirect us from the 🔥 of hell. Amen sister this is so powerful
Am happy for you. This has encouraged me because we are both believers.
Needed to see this, ty!
It's so funny... I'm sitting here watching this because I'm 30. I have the husband, the house, the kids, and I looked through your channel and thought, "wow, I would really enjoy being single and traveling to Italy..." I even wish I had a parent who I could lean on for support like your mom is helping you. Grass is always greener! All we can do is try to live in the moment and enjoy it for what it is. But if I knew how to do that maybe I wouldn't be bringing videos about feeling like a failure at 30 lol
I learned that as humans we cannot be fully satisfied where we are.I was 29 and told my friend who was pregnant said same.I thought she was content but she wasn’t.She was like girl I envy you …I’m like what
It's very okay to look at others situations but always be appreciative of ur own experience
Funny I am 31 and I want the house, husband and kids. 🥲
I’m almost 37 and am so yearning for the husband, kids, and career.
Nobody can have it all. Yeah, you may want to be single and travel to Italy for a month, but in reality I highly doubt you'd trade your life for being single, no kids and no house at your age.
I’m 29 and I’ll be 30 in December and I feel this exact same way! I cried on my birthday because I was grieving the fact that I did not reach certain milestones before this age. I don’t have a degree, I’m not married nor do I have kids yet. My family has been asking when will I find love and have children, and I can’t tell them when because I literally don’t know. Then I see all of my peers (classmates) living what looks like their best life on social media. They’re traveling, they have their own families and they good careers. And yet I’m still single, living on housing assistance for an apartment. I feel completely left behind. I finally started therapy this year and it definitely helped but I would still love to see certain things come to pass in my life. I would love to travel and find my person. It’s a lot to mentally take in and cope with daily but seeing transparent vids like these let’s me know I’m not alone and things will change when it’s the right time.
Stop watching social media. It’s not real and people show a smile and then go cry, hate their lives but work hard to show how perfect their life is. Just love ur life and be happy and grateful for where you are, wherever that is.
Sis the moment you let go of life's conditioning, that's the moment you elevate life. Create your own rules, it's your life not societies. Less is actually more. The quiet moments are more precious than the loud events in life x
That last part was a word! I am realizing that life is better when I focus on the smaller things.
Thank you for this comment
Wow thnx for that!
♥️
Amen Luna! The moment we decide to actually let go of the society's timelines of our own lives, the moment we can start doing things at our own pace and living our lives.
literally me at 32. After traveling extensively I felt like I had nothing to show for it and “behind” everyone else. Fast forward to 34, I’m pregnant, married & headed toward buying. Does this feel more fulfilling ? Not necessarily… traveling was extremely fulfilling. I’m also excited about baby and love my partner. I’m also bored at times & don’t feel like compromising. All these feelings are okay! Happiness isn’t defined by what you have or what milestones you’ve reached. Let the joy you find lead you to where you are supposed to be and I think that’s where the success is. Lastly, life comes at you FAST and can change. Don’t rush it girl ❤
I so needed this
I loved this comment ❤ such good advice and comforting
I’m loving 30’s so much it feels fresh and new !!!! I have nothing what society tells me I should have but I feel so free and confident
I’m running my own race!!! 20’s was all about comparing and competing with society but not anymore!!
Hit home ❤
Wise words thank you, im currently 32 and feel it in my heart that things won’t last forever and seasons change, thanks for your comment 😊
I wish I had what you have. You are younger than me and have it all. I am almost 38 and have no husband, no career, no job, no money for travelling.
thanks for sharing this video sis. I'm 38 and One thing I learnt in life is that no matter how little, no matter the age it's never too late to get started and having the mindset that every day of your life you're evolving. Life becomes unpleasurable when you add too much pressure. I started my path to reinventing myself a year ago, I’m now living healthier, confident, stronger, making 6 figures, having leisure to enjoy family &friends. I feel happier and living my life for myself . This is to encourage someone “you can start anytime to have a reset it’s worth it! I’m striving to continue growing cus it’s a journey 💗
Congratulations sis! Thanks for encouraging others with your story, I will love to get tips from you too
Change your mindset, read self-help books, expand knowledge, budget and don't spend on impulse, save, take your finances seriously, eat healthy, exercise your body, meditate; the list goes on... I hope it is useful to you.
How did you grow to 6 Figure ? I’m honestly trying to work on my personal finance this year.
Congratulations to you ma'am that's a great accomplishment keep it going 👍
I learnt to be frugal, minimal on spending, saving and paying myself first through Investing, made Plans, growing passive income, Read a lot of books on finance, followed my plan consistently.
I’m 28 and I’ve been struggling with feelings like I’ve totally wasted my 20’s. You have no idea how reassuring this video is to me 😭
I turned 28 this year and feel exactly the same way as you. 😭
Me too and can relate
I felt the same when I was 26 & that led me to depression, Thank God a close friend of mine guided me through prayer & fasting...
Same and I „only“ just turned 25…
OMG.... Me too
Life doesn’t really start til age 35 relax youngsters 😌 I’m age 36 and just got out a 12 year relationship and starting over but I’m excited for this new journey.
I just turned 30 and I relate to this. I am dealing with huge anxiety 24/7. I developed insomnia because of my worry of being 30 and girls who are younger have it more together. But this week, for some reason I am beginning to learn that God has an astonishing plan for whoever is going through in their 30s.
That's right. I turned 30 January as a man the pressure is more on us to have it all.
I relate to everything you said here! It’s amazing to think that we feel very alone but a lot of us are going through the same thing- the anxiety, the insomnia, the worrying about the future. Thank you for sharing and agree that sometimes we just have to give it up to God and believe there is a bigger plan for us. Sending love ❤
@@kodakkkkincam Very nice of you Megan! I as a man needed this. 💚 Thank you!
I was jealous of those girls, too. But when i look at my friend, 1 year younger than me, 2 kids, single mother, already divorced after 1 year of being married after being cheated on, i kinda enjoy my singlehood for now.( I do not want to make her into the" negative" role model etc. only an example). Actually the opposite, she's a fighter. Problems in life NEVER go away. They only change their forms.
YAAAAASSSS ❤🙏🏼
I am forty, just quit my job my own will. I live in the same flat i moved in to when i was 23, and i have no children or spouse. I enjoy the sun, the chirping of the birds and the fact that i am alive. Have no regrets. Life is a gift
Im turning 35, same as your situation (no spouse, no kids...) how do you pass time, you're pretty much done with life half way?
@@kunalshah7550 Life is not done, its happening all the time. I write, i go for walks or run, i chat with strangers.
Time passes me. Sometimes i am somewhat bored in the evenings, but boredom is a normal feeling.
But my biggest trick is to not compare myself to any other persons or lives. When comparisons stop, life becomes more obvious and strikingly unique, as your own experience.
@@jonber9411 love your attitude. Thanks for sharing. Will share with anyone who cares to talk about life
Yes, nature is abundance, animals are always around. We are never alone. Great perspective to share!
@@jonber9411 wonderful ❤️
Evamarie I'm 54 years old, I just completed an LPN program at the age of 50 so today I've been a nurse for 3 years. I feel as though I'm living my best life in Him(Christ). I'm contemplating on doing a bridge program for the LPN to RN program. When one feels complete is when you are living in the moment, season, or time. Get a relationship with God. He knows who we are and where we are going.
This comment blessed me! Thank you!
Wow thanks Lisa God bless you 💝
Amen.
"Get a relationship with God" - the only directive we need, I love it!
Amen
I'm 33 and literally have nothing!!! I even deleted all my videos on here because I was so ashamed to talk about it. Seeing all these comments makes me feel that I'm not alone. Thank God someone else said it out loud.
You ain't alone.
True you aren't alone
Right here with ya
I feel the same way as you too. I’m almost 34, still living with my dad, and I’m single with no kids. I sometimes feel like I’m living like a teenager but this video helps me realize I shouldn’t feel this way because I’m not alone. There are plenty others in their 30s who are in our situation. We’re in this together sis!
Let God guide you. ❤
I'm 35 with my mom...tried living alone and didn't like it....I told my mom im not moving out again until im married....I don't want children...I don't have a man...I see no point in leaving 😂😂😂❤❤❤
@@LoveAlways1002
I don't want kids either but the feeling of wanting to be with a man is killing me slowly ... I know i am pathetic but it's the truth ... I want a man ... Somehow your comment consoled me 😢
For women is different. We don’t have until 50 to have children. The older we get the harder will be to want to have a child. I think that’s mostly the worry here. I am 33 and not married not kids. I am worried bc of this 😭😭😭
@@20vannesa are you actively going to places where you might meet single men or online dating? If you don't do these things it will be hard to meet a man randomly
Because of the student debt & economic downturn it is more people living at home during 30. Nobody should feel any type of way! We didn’t have kids we couldn’t afford and didn’t marry someone we didn’t love to say we have it all. Your journey is uniquely perfect to you.
Im turning 32 in 6 weeks, I dont have a husband or kids - I never had age attached to something beyond my control. Im intentional about being happy. When you complain, you will always find something to complain about, when you choose to be content - you will realise that you have so much more to be grateful for
Nossa. Sábias palavras. ♥️
I kinda of girl
God bless you
Wow great advise... I'm always complaining... I'll learn to be content
So true. I have learnt to stop complaining and try to appreciate the good in every situation
You’re not alone, I will be 30 next year and I’m still trying to figure it out…while also living with my mom. Take those social media breaks when you need to.
We got this girl!
Thanks girl! We’ll both get there!
I turn 30 next year too and sometimes wish I lived with my mom😂. I feel like we all want things we don't currently have but in reality we already have them we just haven't caught up to that reality yet. We just have to enjoy the journey!like Eva said...we can't focus on the long term goals its all about the now✨✨🌷🌸
I am currently 30 and living with my family, I also want the career, husband and kids. This life, I am enjoying the moment...
Men like women living at home , careful with the lies told by feminism
Same! No career, but a passion and a very good man. Debt and not a lot of money and still living with parents😂 Glad I'm not alone. But we can do it! It will be okay.
I'm trying to think about it like a marathon: when you fall behind, you don't just stop. You take a deep breath and try your best to reach that finish line.
I’m 43 and still have no spouse or kids, but honestly I know I can still feel fulfilled even if those things never happen.
With all due respect can you tell me your remedy? I am in my 30’s and feel lost at times. And when I read your comment I got so much admiration for your mindset.
@@MC-ji7br Having a strong support group helps, faith will also get you through. Bad days will come and go but God will always be there for you.
Same age and situation as me, I'm ok with my situation
@EBThisThat same! Well, I will be 43 in December, and guess what? I am fine with that.
You’re past the even if stage either it’s now or never
It is a privilege to live with (a) parent(s). I'm 35, same boat except mom passed away last week and dad died years earlier. No sibblings or family around. I had a very different vision with my life, being a caregiver both boosts and destroys your esteem. On one had, you feel useful but on the other you've sacrificed yourself (financially, emotionally, professionally, socially) to watch your loved one who passed away inspite of your efforts to care for them. Social media is fake fake fake.
My condolences 😢
I understand you soooo muchhhhh............you are not alone
I experienced the same things in my late 20s. I’m almost in my mid 30s now and some of the worries don’t go away even when you achieve the “status quo” life there will always be something else to worry about. So for me it’s all about perspective. I choose to look at things that I have achieved and how far I’ve come, rather than things I’m yet to achieve. I remind myself and thank God for air in my lungs, a roof over my head and having close family and friends.
Great video 👍🏾
Yeah, I agree that changing perspective is important and something I’m working on! Better to be grateful for the things we’ve done and have than to be worried about things we haven’t done or don’t have.
This is so true!
Amen. Agreed
Something im starting to realise
Is that
It’s okay to live an ordinary life, without kids or marriage. There’s nothing wrong with not being a millionaire or famous
Being ordinary is okay
I realised this while watching Master of None season 3
I definitely want to focus more on having a simpler life!
It doesn't make mathematical sense to push every young person to be the next Hollywood star, the next president, the next ceo of a groundbreaking company or the next einstien. It's less than 1% of people that get those kinds of successes. It's not probably or feasible to expect that.
👏
@@fcasias7 there is a pressure by parents and society especially as the eldest daughter and south Asian 🙃 like idk if AI will take over our jobs by the time we graduate (late cuz I just said YOLO and travelled abroad for a year cuz I kinda made weird decisions also Corona happened lol) like will data analytics data science exist in 4yrs uncertain times worst part it feels like even my cousin's and classmates are living their lives like wtf? 👀😭
Sim. Ser normal também é bom. ♥️
I’m 25, bilingual, have a college degree and worked full-time overseas in a lucrative career for 4 years and I’ve had rich “friends” talk down to me and imply that I’m a loser because I took the last year partly off by working part-time as a teacher and pursuing a psychology degree. The messed up part? I believed them for a hot minute. The point I’m trying to make is it doesn’t matter how “successful” you are; there are always dissatisfied people who will try to pull you down to make themselves feel better. Once you get infected with that mindset, you’ll never see yourself as being enough. What I’ve learned so far? Your happiness is the most important. Live your life how you want.
I'm 29, will be turning 30 in January. Throughout my teenage years I also imagined all sorts of achievements: graduating university somewhere abroad, I'm from Central Asia and I've always dreamed studying in U.S; finding a good job; moving out of my parent's house at 25; maybe getting married somewhere along the way. But here I am, I've quit university twice due to severe depression; have no job and I still live of off my parents. Sometimes I feel so ashamed and so useless. I understand that I'm being a burden to my parents, and I also know that I'm truly blessed with my family. Right now I'm trying get myself together. I've decided to get back to university and graduate in 3 years. Moreover, I have a very supportive boyfriend and I'm just endlessly grateful to him.
Watching this video made me feel a lot better, because even though I try to convince myself that I'm not alone, I haven't seen anyone around me who'd been struggling the same way I did.
Thank you for this video))
I am 32 , currently living alone, not financially stable, not a permanent employee, trying to make end meets. I am very grateful that I don't have kids since I will not be able to support them. I am holding on to the fact that I am working hard to have a better life, a house of my own, and savings. That's my ultimate goal.
1994 babies can relate all of this whose felt left behind. We feel you and you are not alone.
I'm a 1994 baby and pretty depressed
I am 1994 baby jesus helped me come out of depressed state 😢 now getting my life back
I am 1992 and I feel the same thing
31 years old, I quit my job because of the stress it brought along. Saved some money and next week going to Croatia for a month. Not much of a plan what to exactly do there apart from walking and reading. Feeling constant the pressure I put on myself for missing a lot in my twenties and want to make up with that. I really understand you, I hope we both can find peace and rest in our hearts in the future.
I hope for the same and I hope that some time away in Croatia will let you find some answers that you’re looking for. For what it’s worth, I think walking and reading is as good a plan as any. Sometimes, we need to stop trying to do anything and just let things figure themselves out. At least that’s what I’m trying to do.
Update me sis, where are you now?
I have a feeling you probably met your soulmate in Croatia 😊... If not that's still okay, I guess I've just heard way to many stories of it playing out that way. My apologies
* update* No unfortunately still haven't found my soulmate. After Croatia hiked a lot in Norway. Now one year later trying with my jobcoach to find a suitable job. Which maybe is European Tree Worker, totall different field than before (graphic/ print operator).
I am 36 years old, a single parent, and I’ve felt so much pressure being on social media because people are constantly showing off and I’m not where they are yet. I had to deactivate my instagram. I can totally relate!
well done on this sis.
More power to you.
I stopped posting to family in high school 😂 so the last thing most of them know I graduated from high school.
I got my degree. I’m going back to school soon.
I’m having my first kid and getting married. Will be buying a house within the next few years. I’m 26…. It’s tough in these streets. Idc what they think… we’re all really not doing the same things. They have no idea who I really am ❤
They don't show you the bad. Social media is a huge lie.
We shall not feel forced to share anything on social media. I think the pressure to post everything is very toxic, we shall fight it back!
This is literally what I’ve been going through. I’ve been 30 for almost three months and I live at home with my mom and sisters, I sleep in a twin bed because my sister and I share a room, I’m not married, I have no kids, I work at a job that I don’t like and I can’t tell you how embarrassed and ashamed I feel because I think I’m falling behind in life.
Almost me😢
I am 29 living with my parents and two sisters, I started nursing school last year and I am graduating soon , single no kids . Don’t loose hope …. U r not alone ❤❤❤
Are you in Ghana Adwoa ?
That’s awesome you will feel very accomplished ones you are done ✅ keep going
I am 29 and starting nursing school in the spring. This video is so relatable. I feel an immense amount of pressure
I can totally relate to this comment...
I finished my first degree and served at 25+ but feeling unfulfilled cos I want to go to school of nursing...
Went back to school of nursing immediately after service.
I am 27 now, feel late/left behind.
Congratulations on nursing school ❤ love the transparency in these comments
“We can’t be so focused on the goals we have in our life that we forget to live the moments in between.”- Stay present.
At 26, rapidly approaching 27 I am just now learning to embrace my slow and quiet life. I always imagined that I’d be in a much different place in my life than I am currently. Rather than shaming myself for not being who I imagined I’d be at this age I am just trying everyday to be present & full of gratitude. Life doesn’t end when 30 comes and I’m not behind, just going at my own pace.
I didn't become financially independent until I was in my late 30's, and I'm still in my 30's. In addition to having purchased my second home and earning money on a monthly basis through passive income, I've also achieved three out of five goals. I just hope this inspires someone to realize that it doesn't matter if you don't have any of these things yet, you can start today no matter your age. Change your future by investing! I made a rather big decision by investing in the financial market.
I agree with you and I believe that the secret to financial stability is having the right investment ideas to enable you earn more money, I don’t know who agrees with me but either way I recommend either real estate or bitcoin and stocks..
I keep wondering how people earn money in financial markets, i tried trading on my own made a huge loss and now I'm scared of investing more…
@@face2lune Understanding your financial needs and making effective decisions is very essential. If I could advise you, you should seek the help of a financial advisor. For the record, working with one has been the best for my finances...
I’m Glad i stumbled on this. Please, if its not too much of a hassle for you, can you drop the details of the CFP that assisted you and how to get in touch….
@@face2lune I get guidance from *Susan Tori Davis* Most likely, the internet should have her basic info..
NO cap...just before i turned 30, i literally had your exact same circumstances. No job, no dates, no money. In addition to feeling like a failure, the 2009 housing market depression happened around the world and half my friends lost their jobs. It was sort of like 2020 pandemic. Anyway, i celebrated my 30th birthday, found a job, then an apartment and moved out of my parents home. by 33 I was married and doing great. I'm 45 and still doing great. Trust me. Life can turn in your favor in a heartbeat. Keep grinding. What is for you and WHO is for you is out there right now seeking you just as hard as you are seeking it. You got this.
Girl I’m 36 and I totally feel you. It’s normal to feel this way but let me telll you. 30 is still young. You have time to go for it. Start today, it’s not too late, but don’t delay
You're the only person telling her to exercise personal responsibility by actually applying herself to accomplish the things she wants instead of settling for a life of mediocrity.
Thank you for sharing , Im 23 and DEFINITELY needed to hear this. I feel so rushed.
As someone who has gone through (and is still going through) almost the exact same steps as you have (graduated, worked for a bit then lived in Italy, moved back, no career, no family, no house, no idea where I want to live), I completely 100% agree with you on all these points. As 27-35 year-olds, we 're stuck between 2 generations: raised by a generation that defines success as "grow up, graduate, have a stable career and a family" and we're living with a generation that defines success as "grow up, have flexibility, and change as often as possible". I still struggle with feeling like I have fallen behind or failed, sometimes, but the best advice my dad ever gave me was, "No matter how old you get, or how much time has passed, remember that this is your life and no one else's. The right thing will happen for you at the right time, so don't waste time trying to follow someone's else's dream or feeling bad that you haven't met society's expectations. Live your life, enjoy every single second of it, and prepare, and when your time comes, excel at it!"
Your dad gave you some really great advice! It’s so amazing though, that the “enjoying your life” part can be the most difficult, especially since we are between two generations, but it’s the most important. And patience is truly a virtue! ☺️
I’m not even a part of this demographic, I’m apparently completely alone.
Thank you for your dad saying It gives me hope
🥹🥹🥹🥹💗💗💗💗👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Your dad sounds like he was awesome xx
I feel the same way. I’m 35 no kids not married I just lost my dad. I’m in a relationship that is not the best. I am working on my peace and joy. So I isolate myself a lot. I just want time to my self
I'm 36yrs, no child and not married. Worked as a teacher for the past 12yrs now and I'm behind financially but I have told myself that my dreams, goals, visions and aspirations are not tied to my age. I keep working on myself and building myself without having to compare my life to anyone.
I was there! 30 starting out in a new career renting a house. Then I went through a divorce at 34. Thankfully no kids involved but to pay for everything I had to move in with my parents and go back to square one! I never gave up! Bought my own house found a new girlfriend who is now my fiancée. I just landed a job as a director. Just a few years ago it felt like I was a failure even older than 30! Now I’m 38 and my life is much better. Circumstances change but just keep the drive to move forward and things will get better
I AM 43 and resonate with allllllllll of this! I spent my 20s and 30s chasing dreams and saying NO to what everyone else was doing…chasing dreams with no plans of not achieving them…at 43, I wish I was way more rational/logical…at 43 I have not a clue of what I AM doing day to day, just took my 2nd leap of faith, this time with nothing to cover me, but I asked for guidance and I did as I was guided to do! I continue to tap in and ask for guidance daily…and for continuous faith 🙏🏽
Hey ! I just want to let you know that sometimes it is still better to try follow a dream and say you tried ! I know that may sound cheesy or cliche ! But it shows your sense of motivation and character ! And imagine you chose the logical and rational life ! I 100% guarantee you would probably have been unfulfilled and commented here that you wish you would have at least tried following your dreams ! Regret of not doing something is always bigger ! I am nearly 29 and trust me I am still seeing just how youthful your 40s is ! Do not give up please !! You have this ! Today is a new day I am rooting for you !!! ❤
It is like we are all ants and must follow the line to feed the queen 🐜.. Life sucks sometimes
I’m 33 and resonated with EVERY point you mentioned.. saying NO to what everyone was doing because I wanted my dreams… sigh 😔
@@relaxcalmly1742 but it shows your amazing character that you wanted something more 🌷 that you wanted to try your best in life 😄🎊
I’m sitting at the hair dresser crying while watching this video. I’ll be 28 a week from today. I feel like I’m losing my friends that have been there for me my entire life, still live at home, can’t drive, never been in a serious relationship and not making as much money as I want. I feel upset or depressed almost every weekend. I feel like everything is spiraling out of control and being taken away from me. I know all that I’m working towards will all come in time and what’s important is that I’m taking the necessary steps to get there. Thank you for making me feel like I’m not alone. 🙌🏻
You most definitely aren’t alone . I can relate to alot of this . Life is making room for what’s next for you . Every step of the journey really is a building block for your future siccuess so try to enjoy the moment love . Your feelings are valid , but we all are doing the best we can with our circumstances. I know you will have the happy life that you deserve . I hope things are getting better and you feel seen and heard . Keep going sweetheart 💚💫
* success lol 🙏🏽✨
@@auraoptics thank you so much for these helpful words. ❤️. I wish the same for you as well 💕
Well, you can learn to drive, there are schools out there that teach driving. Turning 28 is a tough age. I remember it well, it is when I ditched everything and moved across the country to start over. You can change your life if you want. Even consider a seasonal job (coolworks is a good website) to just get yourself out of your rut and comfort zone.
@@vooo1314 Thank you! Currently in the process of learning how to drive but just can’t seem to pass the road test. 😩
You're not alone...I'm 35 single no kids still living at home. I've tried tons of dating apps and I'm not a big social butterfly due to social anxiety. I'm so exhausted and just don't have the energy to keep trying.
Any recommendations for social apps?
Girllll I feel you on feeling like you have no energy to keep on trying. I’m 25 years old and just got a masters and now feel like I’m tossed in adulting. And it’s so overwhelming and scary. Like I thought I was a confident person, but I’ve been experiencing so much social anxiety, performance anxiety, and depression. I feel like I’m living 2 different lives. One that people see and my actually thoughts and feelings, that no one really sees. But I’m learning that community helps. Not shutting people out and slowly letting people in to see the realer and truer you. We can do hard things!! So Holly Chen I see you and hear you❤
You are not alone
Try badoo. I had 2000 likes there and met my fiance on there.
I’m 43. No kids, husband, living in poverty and my career is at a standstill cuz of depression & becoming my brother’s caregiver. I feel so behind and embarrassed.
How your feel is so normal. But you can start by going to therapy, mapping out what will make you happy and following that path patiently. Also another family member can care for your brother. The burden doesn't have to be all on you. Good luck, you will make it through. 40s is still young.
You can start a side hustle at home that isnt costly... research!
Sorry for that ma'am..no one deserves that
I trust that God’s got you🙏🏽 It’s impossible to be behind in your life bcuz it’s YOURS. Embrace your journey and your future✨🫶🏽
I also struggle with depression. Today I did an at home palates class via streaming. Physical activity is key to lifting depression. Good luck and stay encouraged!
From the bottom of my heart, thank you for this video. It helped save my life. I had thoughts of ending my life. It's been 9 months since my breakup with my ex of 8 years and engaged. I have no job, didn't finish high school (trying to now), can't drive, no friends and living at home with my parents and students. I feel like a failure and a loser. But this helped me realize we are not alone and everyone is on a different timeline. It's been hard but praying and hoping that I will make it and have a better life.
I did not see this by accident ❤️ I’m 3 days from 30 back at home, no kids, bad relationship, no “career” just a job I hate. I’m with you.
Life will get better as long as you keep making progress towards your goals. You only lose when you give up on yourself.
It's a bad week for all of us maybe.
Next week will be better.
And a year from now will be different.
Maaan no one prepared us 90s kids for adulting huh 😢 ill be 30 in December and girl, same.
Also, happy birthday! 🎉
@@monicawanjikumwaura6689the economy and false american dream failed us. Not to mention toxic workplaces that has alot of us flocking to solo spaces to make our money. Its slow money tho
I feel so much comfort reading you guys comments. Makes me literally feel like I'm not alone. Thank God for this video I truly needed it.
Same here Sis. Been having countless of breakdowns over the past few months until I came across this video, which wasn't a coincidence I believe. And reading the comments just lifted so much off of my shoulders...
❤ We live in hard times tbh economically, with the cost of living rising I'm grateful to be living with my parents!
I feel like you should make a group of all of us in the comments so we can check in and make sure everyone is ok. You aren’t behind. I got diagnosed with adhd after school, still figured that out and realised the 30% rule. Of age with adhd is true for me. So my actual age is 21.7 currently and that’s how I’m counting now. I have a new respect for myself and realised the major 2nd chance I just got at life. I’m grateful. You should be too. Realisation is the first step.
I’m 24 and already feel this pressure. I have so many goals, I want to accomplish by the time I’m 30.
Thank you for this. I recently quit my job and I’m moving to Italy in 3 days. I have no plan, no friends, and no job. I’m so scared but also so excited to finally have a chance to reset abs get away from the hustle culture in the U.S.
Aww I hope you enjoy your time in Italy! It can be an adjustment but with patience it’s really such a wonderful place to live. It helped me learn to slow down a bit more.
Stay away if you're black, I live here and it's hell
Update?
What are you going to do in Italy 😊
So life update?
May God comfort all of the 30s in the comments section feeling this way too. I'm way younger(Only 23) but I realise that there is no reason to put unnecessary pressure on myself and I can use all of you as my point of reference. Hold on to the fact that when the time is right, God will make it happen for you. Life is not linear and you can never know when what is going to happen, just live in the moment and be grateful for every moment in life. Love Thato Olga ❣
Thank you. I wish I was this wise when I was 23.
@@Mimi-zk8rq 😢❤❤
I'm 24 and i also feel pressured. I have a job, a car and a supportive mother but some of those who went to varsity with me are getting married/engaged/buying houses/having babies
And I've never felt so behind in life. And social media makes it worse.
That's a very positive way to put it, considering the gap it represents. This is the way to go about ourselves. We're only so young, God's timing is the best❤️🔥
Well said😊 . God is good and let God lead. All things work in time.
I'm in the same boat. Had to move back home after a failed engagement and find it difficult at times not to look in the mirror and see failure. I have no kids, no home of my own, no significant other, and a job that pays somewhat decent but not enough to live on my own. I will be 35 in 3 months and I most definitely have nothing together...but I've learned that this is exactly where I needed to be in life, unfortunately. I wasn't ready for marriage and kids. The universe knew. I can change my situation but first I have some things to work on within myself. I don't allow people to tell me where I should be in life anymore due to my age. I now make my own rules and feel so much better mentally/emotionally. I just remind myself that timing is everything. What I desire I will receive ✨️
You are saying exactly what im feeling! I turned 30 yesterday and the night before, I broke down crying because I hadnt accomplished enough. I rent a room, and work a high school diploma level job, after earning a masters degree that hasnt done much for my career without relevant experience, plus I'm single. I am working toward better but these student loans make me feel like I'm drowning! May our 30s and beyond be much better in Jesus name. This is temporary!
Thank you for making this video, it was recommended to me randomly by the algorithm. I'm 31, soon to be 32 living at home with my parents, no job, no relationship, no children and I feel like an enormous failure. I never thought this would happen to me either, but here I am. Thank you for sharing your story, I needed this 🙏🏼❤
Same
I’m 33 and this does cross my mind ALOT cause society do put pressure on you but I learned a lot of people barely making it to be 30 so I found the blessing in appreciating getting old and just living figuring things out as I go and not compare myself to others we got this girl keep pushing
Big facts
I'm 33 i sometimes feel that same way i work in retail and still live with my mom. But then again some people i know married got kids have it all together still complain they are not happy. I mean yeah i do get lonely sometimes since alot of people my age are married. But I'll say I'm lucky i have a job and a roof over my head and a few friends to talk to. And you never know a person that may have it all could have it gone as well.
I feel you on this so much! I’m 31, I thought I’d be done having kids by now but a baby is still not even close. Career wise, I’m jumping from job to job because I struggle to find my path(I can’t afford to have kids). It’s a very sad feeling and sometimes I feel like giving up on everything but I have faith there’s a light at the end of the tunnel.
I pray we all achieve our dreams and find true happiness x
Its a different time from when our parents were 30! They were older than us millennials. For a lot of us kids don't make sense until about 30 so youre on time. Thank God you have options.
Same!
Amen in Jesus' Name
@@9188jennihaving options? Getting pregnant on a natural way above the age of 30 is getting harder and harder.
And you know, being 30, no partner, getting pregnant with a person you fully trust takes at least 3 years. Then you are 33 at that point at best.
You ladies live your lifes differently than your mothers, but your biological clock ticks at the same speed.
Please don't forget that.
Amen
As a 32-year-old, we millennials were raised with a playbook that doesn't apply to reality. We were told to do x, y, and z and voila we'd have "a decent life" by simply "just trying", then social media compounded extremely rare living experiences and the hyper-wealthy as now "achievable for anyone" if you just "try hard enough" - like, worst mixture for us. Delaying or forgoing marriage, childbirth, living at home, or working a job that makes us unhappy or underpays us or BOTH are totally normal experiences. So many of us have the same exact experience. Just chase the things that make you happy and lean into love when you find it, and you'll be okay. We're all in it together.
Love this! I’m 32, I thought I was going to get engaged this year after a 2.5 year relationship. Didn’t happen. I thought I was going to be a successful business owner in home staging didn’t happen. My life has turned a different direction for the good. I am now moving back home to atlanta, to build generational wealth and travel around the world until my heart desire. Things don’t always go as planned but that’s the beauty of the journey.
I'm in the same situation. 29 about to be 30 in a few weeks. No career, not married, no kids, I feel like there's no point in even trying to do anything anymore. I'm feeling more and more hopeless the closer I get to turning 30. I've spent my 20s struggling with depression and anxiety, eating my problems. I really wish I could change how I've lived my life.
Change is coming your way. People now a days always tell me "get a wife for yourself" sometimes I just laugh
I am the same way. Career, and wanting to be married with kids.
The good news is you change your mindset and the path of your future.
29 is so YOUNG! There is no way you should give into that feeling of not trying anymore. Pls keep going after your goals so you don't look back at 40 in regret.
@@KatyPopplewell wish you the best sis
I just turned 29 and felt this HEAVY. Especially with being financially insecure and not knowing where to find peace. I am grateful to have a partner that helps keep me motivated to move forward but it's very hard.
I'm 31 and still living at home. It wasn't till I was 29 did I start a career for myself and I remember being so happy because I finally felt like I was "catching up" to my peers. It took time for me to realize that everyone's life is different and like you said "social media isn't real". I had to shift my perspective and realize that yes, I might still live with my parents but i'm saving money and when it's time for me to leave i'll be financially secure. Every now and then I still feel the societal pressure to be further ahead in life, and that's okay as long as I don't allow myself to sit in those feelings for to long. Thank you for sharing this video :)
I can completely relate to the message of this video. I’m turning 30 in 52 days and I feel sometime like a failure. As an African man, I was expected from my family to have my own family house and stability in my late 20s as my dad and uncle did. Getting that pressure every time, especially from family members and comparing me to my friends who have got engaged or married and had kids recently. In my case, I had to start everything from scratch when I moved to the US, and I have the feeling it’s so complicated to get into a stable and long term relationship in this country. All those feelings make me just avoid celebrating my birthdays every year, or not attend events or celebrations with my community (from my country) here in my town because they tend to compare people’s accomplishments, check on your life in an intrusive way.
Thank you for sharing this with us, you just got a new follower .
I’m sorry but I read this and I would suggest stop putting so much weight on their opinion. It’s not that serious that you stop celebrating your bday please
Are you Nigerian? That community sounds like a Nigerian community to me
Timing is everything, when the right time comes and we work, pray and stick to the goals, we will surely get there and achieve it more better and greater. Don't give up now. God has a way of turning things around
I didn't know that even men at 30 are pressured like women 😢 sorry, An African woman here in the same situation
Im so hurt, 35 and I feel so behind. I live with my mom who is not supportive and anytime I get a leg up she tries to guilt trip me. Im so tired, went on vacation for the first time on my own and came back home to my mom stating I made her depressed because I traveled. I have tried multiple times to move but always end up back. No kids, home, life. Im so sad inside and when I do state I am disappointed in myself, no one wants to listen to me because its negative. Watching this video does help but it still hurts.
OMG - this is like watching myself like 5-6 years ago (I´m 36 now). I didn´t meet my boyfriend until I was 30. I though I´d have children by 24 years old. My first child was born when I was 32. My career is still a rollercoaster it feels. I wish more people would share their actual stories so it would´nt feel like such a failure when we don´t reach the certain milestones by a certain age. Everyone´s journey is unique - I just wish we saw the uniqueness in social media!
Thank you for sharing your reflections and story
Thank you. 🌷
Thank you for sharing your story! ❤
Yes! Agreed!
Yeah but at least you have a child! women are different. We don’t have until 50 to have children. The older we get the harder will be to want to have a child. I think that’s mostly the worry here. I am 33 and not married not kids. I am worried bc of this 😭😭😭 I want a child soooo bad
@20vannesa what about adoption?
I'm 25 years old now, couple months ago I was going through something like a quarter-life crisis. I was feeling so behind in life, but work on myself has helped me. I know that everything what's going to meant to be it's gonna happen at the right time, I don't need to rush. It's much beautiful when you enjoy your life journey without the fear to "have it together" already.
U won't live till 100
So that's not quarter life
@sabrinaresurrected no what
Who said
Quarter of a an hour is not 25
Quarter of a year is not 25
I'm 34 and have everything I've always dreamed of and I'm very happy. But I didn't have a traditional 20s, I did all the "wrong" things. I became a mom at 20, dropped out of college got divorced young etc. All the things that my friends feared, avoided and often used me as an example of a cautionary tale 😏. Despite things not working out for me 100% of the time, they did work out for me by the time I was 30. I know it's not the path most people would like to have for their lives but I didn't choose misfortune, I chose to keep going and keep building. Good luck.
Hi! I saw this and I had to comment. So I’m thirty this year going on 31 and I’m one of the people that left home at 17, traveled, graduated and couldn’t find a job in my career, traveled some more, lived at home with my parents at 24-25 traveled and became an expat, then finally got my career on track. So now I’ve been blessed with the experiences and the career and I’m on my second engagement. The first fell through because of distance but the second one is a different beast and I’m at a crossroads. On one end people are shaming me for NOT being married (even though I’ve had a wildly successful and fun life NO social media) and others shame me for not having kids. Ironically, I’ve chosen not to have either at this point in my life and it has made a tremendous difference. I like to live without regrets and if If I feel like I would regret not having an experience, I need to try that thing. All of this to say, enjoy your journey. They will shame you regardless. Society is never content. It’s all about who has more and who does more. This is why I have no social and I barely talk to friends or family. Run your race and enjoy your life! It’s your canvas. Paint it how you see fit. I’ve made peace with never being married and if that’s the case I’ll become an expat and live off grid and create art for a living. Tell your story and make your mark!
I am 40 years old ,no money,no job, not married,no house of my own, living in my father's house,my sister feeds me.Sometimes i just wonder.God I thank you for greater days ahead.
I'm 35,single ,no kids and now graduating from Medical School. My siblings will always tell me to stop chasing my big dreams ( because I quit my job as a nurse and started all over again at 30) , and settle down and have kids.Although I'm sometimes moved by what they say, and wanting to be in a relationship or get married, a huge part of me is satisfied with my present state and I keep telling myself that ,this life I have is about me to live and not about society's standards.I'm happy with my choices and I'm content now.That's all that matters . Worrying about what will be has never yielded any fruit in anyones life.I've learnt to take one day at a time ,and enjoy the moment as it present itself .
Wow that s so cool. What country? Good luck for your next steps 1🎉
Cheers to you and your success!!
Amazing 🎉
I am a 29 year old nurse and this really resonates with me and thank you 🙏.
This is literally me. I just turned 26 but one thing that God has taught me through this long season is that just because your life is not going as conventional and linear as you wanted doesn’t mean your failing or falling behind. The word I kept getting is your right where your supposed to be, trust God that you will get there. Everybody has different journeys and with that comes different timelines and paths. People have looked at me and told be I’m blessed in my current situation. I believe we just have to enjoy the present moment, acknowledge that our circumstances are temporary, life is always unfolding. Also, to try not to compare ourselves. Life is truly a process and it’s to enjoy and endure. Thanks for being real and sharing 😊
Just stumbled across your video and can relate at 37, as I‘m working on a second degree and don’t have much going on.
The only balance I have is working out,otherwise I‘d break down.
There aren’t many friends around (all married etc.), I often feel like a lonesome Cowboy riding through the savannah, am often procrastinating and feel the outside pressure daily. It really gets lonely for me so often.
But I know,things will get easier once I graduated, as hard as it gets.
Thanks for the uplifting words,Miss Solanges:) Will return to this video for a while
I feel you bro
I'm 27 and am also doing a second degree to change careers. Good luck, you got this!
I turned 30 3 weeks ago I still feel like I'm 22 I don't have kids nor married or even dating 😫 And my career has been all over the place constantly getting laid off.
Same girl
That’s yu will make it through
SAME!!!!!!
Social media just sucks the joy out of people enjoying the journey to hitting their milestones. The pace varies from person to person. I honestly feel for you. Comparison makes it hard to be content and happy with your current position in your life.
This is why I don’t use most social media and am careful with what I follow. This is so sad that ppl are having mental breakdowns over not having kids or being married at 30. Start with yourself and work on the stuff you can accomplish. Start with self care and financial growth. It’ll give you confidence for the next challenge on your journey!
This!
That’s right. I teach my patients this exact thing in my therapy sessions. Fasting from social media, detaching from toxic people, and getting closer to God/ Jesus are the top coping skills that my patients use that work.
@@just_shaeee Well done and your patients are lucky to have such a conscientious health care provider! 💜
@@just_shaeeeAMEN JESUS is the ONLY way to salvation ❤️🙏🏾
You’re totally not alone. I’m 35, no kids, I’m a solo entrepreneur and realtor and still figuring things out as I go. I definitely have thoughts at times that I’m further behind than I should be, but guess what? I travel, have fallen in love and gone to several music festivals across the country and am finding more and more things to be grateful about. I’ve found that when I decided to make my own rules and not fit myself into a box created by societal standards, I’ve been more happy and take on life one day at a time.
I am 18 and already terfied from hiting 30 😐 what should I do
@@Ruba-v1iappreciate everyday of life you're alive and healthy appreciate loved ones around you dont live in fear do things you're passionate about
@@Ruba-v1i You haven't given a reason for why you're scared of hitting 30, so quit your ageism, because it seems like you terrified of hitting 30 just because you'll be older, not because something will go awfully wrong at 30. You don't know how your life is going to be like at 30 yet, you're only 18, so why would you be terrified of hitting 30 specifically? Your 20s are closer, why aren't you terrified of it? What about turning 25? It just sounds like plain ageism to me.
Wow I’m 29 as well I feel this . Societies pressures, some of the mistakes I have made , some of the joys etc . May God bless us with the desires of our hearts and change our perspective
One thing ive learnt is that no matter what plans we have for our lives, life itself gives no shits and will take you where its going to take you. I'm only a few months away from being 34. It was only last year i quit my 10 year banking 'career' and started working at a pet store. Best decision ive made. I thought id have kids by now, i dont. My life isnt how i imagined it, but it is the way it is meant to be. I think we all feel behind, but true freedom comes when you realize that there isnt anywhere to go so you are never behind.
I have House, husband, 2 kids and a job but what I want the most is some personal time for myself! It is exhausting to ‘have it all’. I am typing this with no make up on and I haven’t eaten anything all day today let alone take a bath. Enjoy this time while it lasts!!!
So raw and honest. You are so brave, powerful and inspiring! Everyone struggles with this. You can be 46, 52, 67 and still feel this way. You are absolutely correct about social media creating this pressure. This video blessed me. ✨🙌🏾
Aww thank you! ☺️ I’m so glad you liked the video. And about feeling this way at any age, I’m seeing more and more that this is true. I think life is a process of constantly figuring out what you want and adjusting.
I’m 33 not married no house or kids, worked different jobs but no career and what helps me is knowing not everyone’s journey is the same.
Same here
This video popped up for me randomly. I'm 37 now and I remember these feelings showing up for me at 30!
At 33, I moved halfway across the US from NYC to Texas alone to have a fresh start in spite of ppl around me saying not to. It was the scariest thing to leave everything I knew but I would do again because of the person I am becoming.
I gave up all social media because of comparisons, see my therapist every 2 weeks and learning to enjoy my life in the ways I want and not living by societal rules/expectations.
Live life by your own terms and give yourself grace always! ✨️
Please never feel embarrassed about living with your parents, My mum died when I was 23 and my dad isn't in my life either if I can give you one piece of advice is that your a beautiful young woman and you will get where you want to be in your life cherish the time you have with your mom because life goes so quicky all the best to you x
I'm sorry for your loss 😢
I went through the same thing. I lost my mum at 23, my dad isn't in my life either.
I agree people should feel blessed to have parents in their life and even the option to move back in with family until they get themselves back together.
Oh sweet summer child 😜 Exactly how I felt at 25, 30, 35, & now 40 😂 The feeling doesn’t go away, even though at 25 I had an art degree & was having a blast with my friends, at 30 I’d written a novel & met my future husband, at 35 I’d won writing awards & got married, and now at 40 I finally realized that being an author is my calling & career goal. Now we travel the country in a converted cabin-van and I’m about to publish 3 more books. Sure, no house yet (ha!) but we travel. No kids but don’t want em. No cat, but want one. Am I happy? Most days 😉 You never know where life will lead, but if you have a passion, joy, or focus (even if it’s just a seed) then you’ll point yourself in that direction without even realizing.
I turned 30 at the beginning of this year, but I've felt lost since 2020, which coincides with the pandemic. My biggest problem is that I never wanted to get married, have kids, or have a home. All I wanted was to live with uncertainty, travel, and enjoy not knowing what awaits me tomorrow. But even that kind of a path takes having money, which I never did. Plus, I quickly realized that although many do that, traveling as a woman is never as safe as when you're a man. Then I fell in love and got married. However, I'm not happy. I achieved that big milestone that society wanted me, and I love my husband, but I'm miserable.
So, the goal is to be true to yourself. Do what makes you happy, not what you think would make others approve of your decisions and lifestyle. And be sure you know what you genuinely want in this life and what our society and its expectations convinced you that you should wish to.
You are not alone. I am turning 30 in 10 days and feeling the same. It's funny they say if you want to make God laugh tell him your project😅. We've planned almost the same thing before 30 but still here, healthy and alive are the weathiest things 🎉
We're all this thing together. It's a journey, not a race. Times aren't what they used to be compared to our parents' generation. They'll be bad days but we keep moving forward. 💛
Btw love that piece of art behind you in frame
Yeah, that's definitely something I'm trying to remind myself of. ❤
Thank you! The artist is Reyna Noriega.
@@evamariesolanges4848 thanks! I'll have to look them up
@@evamariesolanges4848 sending you an email about working together
I'm 38 and don't check the traditional boxes. Just live your life and stop stressing out.
This is great. As a 30 year old man, I have struggled with this, as well. Thankfully, I’m in a better mental space. Thank you for this!
same as you, but its tormenting when others have a life and i dont
I’m about to be 37 and I’ve felt this way a long time. People tell me to get out there but they don’t realize I already have and I’m exhausted. I feel so alone and I dread every day. I try to hope but can’t deny my utter disappointment. I haven’t been in a serious relationship and feel like I’ll be alone forever and I’m getting too tired to fight for what I want. My mom passed last year and so I have gotten hugged but I honestly don’t feel anything but alone.
Praying for you🤍🙏🏾
I feel you
When it seems like nothing is going your way and it never will go your way, it may be best to stop focusing inwardly and look outwardly. Shift from what you can do for yourself and focus on what you can do for others. Being in the service of others just might be the thing to breathe new life into you.
I believe, we need to be grateful for all that we have first, and start to believe in the unseen things we hope for daily.
I’m in my mid 30’s now. I just got myself a great job that I love and looking into building a house. All by myself. Still haven’t done the whole husband and kids thing yet. I’m focussing on myself first. 😊
Yeah but for women is different. We don’t have until 50 to have children. The older we get the harder will be to want to have a child. I think that’s mostly the worry here. I am 33 and not married not kids. I am worried bc of this 😭😭😭 I want a child soooo bad
This is the dream 😩 you are an inspiration!
@@20vannesa That's true. But most men who 'wait until 50' - we're talking 99.9% - aren't going to have a kid either. If you want a baby, there are other routes besides marrying someone you don't actually love (or who doesn't love you) just for the sake of having a kid.
Thank you for this! I turn 27 in a few weeks and that’s how I feel about it. It’s a weird thing getting older and you don’t think you’re where you should be. We put so much pressure on ourselves
I'm 27 and like this: no home (of my own), no husband, no kids, no career... (I'm almost hitting the wall - the 3.0), but I don't feel happy for not being the only one, bc I wish everyone was fulfilled in life. I hope everyone here feeling empty, stuck and lost find their way and be happy. God bless you all 🙏🏻❤️
And you're from which country?
@@judeichudi85 Brazil.
@@LilyIglesias are you red-pilled by any chance?
@@indiasupportsthereturnofth1475 yes, kinda. I'm Catholic.
I was feeling like this at 22-24 lol I lost my mom 2019 & it knocked me heavily into spirituality.. I learned how to sit in peace & appreciate who I am.
I'm sorry for your loss.. I lost my mom 2018..
@@elin_ 💙💙💙💙💙
This message definitely resonated with me. The fact that our whole generation feels like this, lets me know that we are all on a collective journey of healing ourselves and breaking boundaries of what life could be.