This episode hit home! I cried when listening to this. I have been so stuck and miserable in my life for such a long time. Always focusing on the negative and what is going wrong, not realizing that I am the one that needs to change it. Thank you so much! I am literally at my breaking point from constant misery and atleast now I know what to focus on to make change occur. Your show is amazing ❤❤
You're allowed to be happy. You deserve to be happy. You are worthy of joy. You are pure light. Therefore your natural state is a happy one. Being open to recieve more joy starts in the micro moments. Celebrating the little wins. Smiling just because. Focusing on the good that already exists. There is always a reason to feel grateful and feel happy. Sometimes you just have to look a little harder.❤
I’ve found this peace. Not perfection. I actually had a rare medical diagnosis from the clenching all my life. Whacky news when I heard it. I could write a whole bunch but I just want to say thanks Mel. Been following you for years before the tv show and you’ve just changed so many lives with your podcast. You’re so freaking real and vulnerable. A sassy gem. Thanks to you and your team.
Listened to this podcast while ironing the kids school uniforms for the week...I could've gone onto another load ...the way I enjoyed listening to her...she's so real, honest and transparent ❤
Mel! I wanted to tell you that this episode hit the "homerun" on my billboard of me! I've been avoiding your podcast since not completing my workbook and feeling bad about it. I'm so grateful I listened to this one because I truly believe you've given me the tools to figure out how to find that happy me again. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I love you, too! Christy
Omg thank you, Mel. ❤ I love the swinging doors metaphor. I will be transparent and admit I have had a 3ft steel door closed and have had the sword in my hand for a very long time. I am committed to dropping the sword and allowing happiness in. I deserve it! ❤
One of the amazing things that are said behind your back Mel is -- “Mel Robins said something to me that saved my life not just saved my life - but I was on my would be death bed and she said something that opened my mind and saved my life!!” I say this to everyone and for the rest of my life this will be something said about you Mel ..
Love this episode! Thanks, Mel! Reminded me of this quote - “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” ― Rumi “
Dear Mel. My name is Nicolene, and I am from South Africa. I have been following you for a couple of months now and I would just like to say thank for your podcast as it has helped me immensely as i am struggling with depression and anxiety but I am working my ass off to get better without any meds as i know i can. This podcast could not have come at a better time in my life as you answered each and every question i was asking myself of why am i so mad all the time. I know now how i am keeping happiness out of my life and will work daily to try my best to let it in again. Thank you for your support even though you have no idea who i am! All the best with your 2024 and may this year just keep on getting greater. We did in fact wake up this morning;)
I feel that I'm so much like you back three years ago. I have the bank vault closed for so long because I don't want to get hurt anymore so I keep the sword up all the time. I've also realized by listening to you that this will not make me happy. I've always wondered why I can't be happy. I retired early, I have a good financial life, my kids are great. I'm my own worst enemy. Not everyone is able to be in the position I'm in. I've let past situations dictate my negative thoughts and emotions. It's time I take control and take ownership. This is my life and my one any only life..... I am going to open the swinging doors. You are such an inspiration. I just love you!
Thank you Mel, I focus too much on negative things not done, instead of saying thank you for things that get done. Love you for all your positive things you teach.
Wow! You have no idea how much I needed to hear this. I have spent most of my life chasing the thing that would finally make me happy! I have been working on looking inward now for a while and it's been working but your summary of the 3 points and making a friction list is exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you Mel! You are my Monday morning magic and my soul sister! I love you so frickin much!!
I guess the next question is, "Why do people block happiness?" Afraid of vulnerability, not feeling worthy of happiness, not wanting to let go of all the things you think you're supposed to be responsible for? Is some of it brain chemistry responding to keep us safe? This is such a great topic to unpack!! ❤ For some, it seems like hypervigilence or always "waiting for the other shoe to fall" type of response that turns into a lifelong commitment to that emotion.
For me, I'm afraid of being vulnerable that someone will eventually take advantage of me by lying or cheating. I need to believe that no all people are like that and it's not fair to them or me.
I just got back to work today after the holiday and Im back in the rut. I had no motivation to do anything, I wanted to cry. I dont hate my job because it's soft and I get to sit in an airconditioned office but I hate where I sit and the job itself was never part of the dream for my life, but I lack the confidence and in-roads to get into the field I want to at my age. I found myself repeating the pattern of the past year, wake up and run out the door, not eating during the day, binging on junk when I got home. Havent completed all the work for the day and I find myself struggling to do any work at the office with all the people around me and the load of work and having to mentor people when I have no time to mentor people. I'm already so tired and upset😭😭😭
One more thing that this podcast helped me to remember is to be happy with the moment you are in. Just enjoy what you are doing at the moment you are doing it. Don't worry about what you need to do next, just take a sec to enjoy what you are doing right now. This helped me a lot and I try so hard to get my sister to do this but she just can't! 😞
I absolutely loved that answer you gave the young mother. She was besting herself up for NOTHING. I was so proud of you telling her she was being SUCCESSFUL. Be thankful for all the victories. That was such a great interview.i love you
Mel Robins I want to thank you for parting the clouds of confusion and frustration in my mind about a personal issue. In all my self doubt and self criticism- you have , in 1 video, made me feel valid, understood, human, relieved beyond belief, and given me a psychological exhalation. Thank you a thousand times. Now where do I go and what do I do with my newfound knowledge. I’ll figure it out, but wow wow wow I feel like a little child who needed glasses and finally an adult put glasses on my face and said see??see!!!! I could kiss you. God bless you x
I didn't realize that from 50:40 and on has never been spoken to me. It never occurred to me until l heard it.. until you said it. Ive told others this many times, because it's exactly what I need to here myself. Thank you Mel for such powerful podcast.
Thank you for all you do. I appreciate you being my best friend that I can listen to everyday & every morning during my morning routine. You help me so much.
MEL....Thank you so much, I am there for so many years. I am going to breathe and listen to this over and over and learn, because I want to find peace and happiness from within the eye of the storm.
I think it's awesome that you asked about the "I love you'" part. I always leave the office and say, "Love ya, bye!" 75% of my phone calls with friends end that way. I think it comes from my aunts and grandparents for sure. I grew up in a traumatic home, my mom often said she loved me but honestly sometimes I wonder if she even knew how. I say I love you because I don't want anyone to ever have a last moment with me and wonder later if I appreciated them and cared about them. Thanks for all you do Mel, Love ya, bye! :D
Thank you Mel; I love you and appreciate your work and support to help us to reach our goals and be happy. It has been rough, lost our Father the day after Christmas and our Mom has dementia and doesn’t know us. We are all separated due to our oldest sister not honoring our Father’s wishes. I let her have it because it truly hurt and felt like she slapped me and our TransBrother in the face since we were living our lives differently from her life and we knew she didn’t approve but we both learned that day just how cruel she could be.
Thank you for pointing out the root of this problem Mel! I have never heard those three words from my parents. Thanks to you I’ve decided to let the sunhine in..
God Bless you and all people listening here to you allways 🙏🙏🙏you are so clear and i love to lusten and lurn from you ❤ Happyness ,joy , succes ,proserytty to you and to Entire pkanrtvi wish from my hearth ❤🙏🙏🙏
Thanks for helping me realize that I really am happy. The only unhappy problem I relate with is the door. Only mine is not just a vault door, it is a brick wall! I've been working on it for years though and know its there. Thank you for the reminder to make it into a door that swings!! XOXO 🙂
I love your work Mel. You have helped me so much with my journey. Im always amazed every time I listen to your podcast. Thank you for all you do. Love you my friend!
This episode was absolutely the wake up call I needed. I am that hurricane living behind the big vault door making excuses for why my bullshit is always someone else’s problem. Thank you Mel for giving me the homework to not only own my bullshit but how to change my doors.❤
thanks again Mel for all your helpful advice and inspiration and hope that things can get better with effort on my part.. I do see things improving in my life and I feel grateful and blessed 😊
Using the Option Process and its five questions moves me to happiness fast; what I had to learn was not to feel guilty about feeling happy. The first time I experienced that happiness, I honestly felt lost in space and watched myself pull in the unhappiness because it felt familiar.
Reminds of my days of being a restaurant manager ; especially on the floor during peek meal periods. I was the eye of the hurricane! I had to set the mood. Contentment is a choice.
This could not have come at a better time! Mel, I love your podcasts! Why do we sabotage ourselves? I have resolved to make this year the best ever, regardless of what is going on in my life. It is up to me and me only. I deserve this and owe it to myself ❤️. Scared to feel good again in case….tradedy strikes again….WOW! You hit the nail on the head….😢 Thank you Mel❤️
lol. Here I thought I was just grumpy because I was getting older! I will let the doors swing open, drop the sword, and say “thank you” to any compliment!
When I was married to a narcissist that blocked my happiness and the hamster wheel was going. I'm so glad he filed. He didn't want to move on because he stayed in my house. My house I owed before we were married. After that he left, I was able to heal and use the let them theory!
Hi Mel, I’m listening to your podcast about happiness, and the car in front of me has a license plate that says great joy, I definitely thought that was a sign!
Thank you Mel for your honesty. I relate so much to what you are saying on this video and on so many other videos too. I am open to learning and change. This is the year for reflection, personal growth and greatness. You are just frigging amazing!!
I so do the bank vault too early door close thing! My boyfriend and I are long distance and we do these amazing things together as he works as a pilot and I am on his flight benefits. We go see these fantastic places and concerts and have the best time.... but I will literally start thinking about us being apart again and having to say goodbye the night before and get all worked up! It ruins the precious time we have and while I am getting better, MAN that's so relatable. Thanks for not making me feel alone, Mel... it's nice when someone else gets it. EDIT: dang it I do the sword thing too! 31:09 hypervigilance is real (and extra bad when you try and go back to normal world from LE world). Daily life hasnt been just... enjoyable... in years.
Mel, this podcast hit home like a sledgehammer. I completely relate to living in your head, focusing on what's wrong, etc. It really is a happiness blocker. Good sharing and recommendations on how to fix. This was a Gem 🙏🙏🙏🌞
Thanks for this tough love podcast today. You really spoke to me. I am always clenching the sword. I'm going to work hard to put it down. Thanks also for sharing your story and your vulnerability and for being so relatable.
I am listening, jot it down and share to my students everything that I can share about what I have learned or what I am learning from you now.❤ I am so grateful to knew your channel. I have shared your videos and channel to all my students here in Korea at Community Cententers I am teaching now.
Mel, how is it that you ALWAYS know what your followers need to hear, precisely when they need to hear it??!! I have been thinking about creating some sort of social media content entitled “CALL IT OUT” where call out the BS I see or experience in this world. I guess episode 1 would start with ME!! Thanks again for this video. I’ve shared, per usual. Love you!
Honestly, what Mel is referring to is not so much happiness, but enlightenment. It's to realize who you truly are, and to realize how you have not been living authentically. How you have been running from you you really are -- chasing degrees, jobs, relationships, money to fill the void. It's to realize you have been listening to and identifying with your ego, which is not who you truly are. "Enlightenment is a destructive process. It has nothing to do with becoming better or being happier. Enlightenment is the crumbling away of untruth. It's seeing through the facade of pretense." - Adyashanti
Hi Mel! I love your podcast and so appreciate how real you are. You sharing that you were creating all this misery for yourself really unlocked something in me realizing how I am actively blocking my own happiness too! I will take your techniques and apply them to my life and I already feel that 2024 will be the year I am truly happy from the inside out! ❤😊
I'm only a third of the way into the episode, but I can I have this clam inside no problem, I have worked to get here and I can absolutely find calm and happiness inside when there is problem after problem after problem but it doesn't change anything for me I would say it is a very useful tool for parenting my children because they feel safe and happy and they see a strong mom who isn't panicking but I kind of always thought that if you can achieve this state that somehow that if I can recognise and give myself grace and what not , that god or the universe will make things a bit better but it doesn't.... so much is wrong and I'm trying so so so hard and now I feel ridiculous sometimes because there is just so much wrong so much to worry about and I cant work any harder then I am I can pay myself on the back but now I am calm in all this mess , I don't even know if it's right to feel that calm. Because things are so bad like I feel like isas more productive when I would panic like how I was years ago. I don't know what I'm doing
I loved this podcast especially the part about swinging doors which I’m going to be visualizing everyday. I also love your outfit, hair, makeup, and jewelry in this episode!
Of the three things, although I identify with carrying a sword in your hand all the time anticipating conflict more, I can say I also identify with the other two. It's almost like I don't know how to be happy, at least now I know the only person in my way is myself. Really good advice, thanks.
"If peace is really what you want, then you will choose peace." - Eckhart Tolle, 'A New Earth' Most people won't admit this, but they do not actually want peace. They get off on drama, chaos, and even their own misery, because these things give the ego life. Once you realize that you are NOT your ego, you will realize that your entire life, in many ways, has not truly been your own. That is when you awaken to who/what you truly are. Often, it takes destruction and a massive ego death to come to this awareness, and to awaken.
Mel - We are twins, EXCEPT I don't have your wonderful family. I so wish I could have a session with you. I live my life like I am in my 40's BUT...I am turning 70 on 2/5. As someone who was sick in bed when I hit 30 and just about every year since. Then later I lament how I wish I was the age I was so upset about. It has driven me crazy and others. One male friend got so frustrated with me that he sent me to his favorite psychic who told me something bizarre. I have had walls up and have so much love to give but have been alone really my entire afult life. This is SUCH a crucial time for me and need to get your input. THIS SESSION IS 100% ME!
I understand your hurricane My daughter moved to San Francisco and is getting married She bought a house out there and will be staying So when they come home for Christmas 🎄 I get so excited I spend a month or more getting ready buying presents stockings and stocking the kitchen with all their favorite foods drinks and snacks Plan things to do and people to visit Then I start to get sad 😢about three days before she leaves NYC to go back to San Francisco I truly try to slow my role and live in the moment My husband always says don’t cry we will see her in a few months My heart breaks and I still after five years miss her so much We speak everyday and check in Grateful for FaceTime so i can see her and share life with her Wish I could live closer so I could help her and enjoy her Life is like a roller coaster 🎢 I have my husband still working my son lives in our apartment saving for a house and my 83 year old mother who lives with us So Mel is visit twice a year and she comes home twice a year I am so grateful I raised to amazing children with great jobs Retired teacher who was planning on helping to raise grandchildren when the time blesses us
Right to the core of it! You are amazing in explaining these sensitive concepts, it shows the wisdom gained after so much working with yourself! Thank you for sharing, love you!! 🤗 🤗
Hoda is absolutely right. I have been in the eye of a hurricane and it is a stunning event. But you know you are about to be hit from the other direction and you brace for it. Life comes at you in all directions and only you can control your reaction to it.
Good grief it was like a clone of myself at around minute 27, 28. I've been doing this for YEARS! I'M exhausted. I gotta get out of my own way, I just turned 58 on the 5th and it's way past time.
This episode hit home! I cried when listening to this. I have been so stuck and miserable in my life for such a long time. Always focusing on the negative and what is going wrong, not realizing that I am the one that needs to change it. Thank you so much! I am literally at my breaking point from constant misery and atleast now I know what to focus on to make change occur. Your show is amazing ❤❤
You're allowed to be happy.
You deserve to be happy.
You are worthy of joy.
You are pure light.
Therefore your natural state is a happy one. Being open to recieve more joy starts in the micro moments. Celebrating the little wins. Smiling just because. Focusing on the good that already exists. There is always a reason to feel grateful and feel happy. Sometimes you just have to look a little harder.❤
I’ve found this peace. Not perfection. I actually had a rare medical diagnosis from the clenching all my life. Whacky news when I heard it. I could write a whole bunch but I just want to say thanks Mel. Been following you for years before the tv show and you’ve just changed so many lives with your podcast. You’re so freaking real and vulnerable. A sassy gem. Thanks to you and your team.
"Perfection belongs to the gods; completeness or wholeness is the most a human being can hope for." - Marion Woodman
Really like what you say,but your swear words drive me away
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OMG I needed to hear this today❤
Listened to this podcast while ironing the kids school uniforms for the week...I could've gone onto another load ...the way I enjoyed listening to her...she's so real, honest and transparent ❤
Mel! I wanted to tell you that this episode hit the "homerun" on my billboard of me! I've been avoiding your podcast since not completing my workbook and feeling bad about it. I'm so grateful I listened to this one because I truly believe you've given me the tools to figure out how to find that happy me again. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I love you, too! Christy
I'll have to listen to this on repeat. Boy, I've gotta wake up. Love you Mel❤, thanks, I needed it so badly. All my life 😎😊
This was the call out I needed. I’m tired of my own bullshit. Committed to living a “happy” life ❤
Me too!
Ditto 💯 I am over my own Bullshit too! I hear her - for some reason, though, believing in ME is such a struggle 🤯
Me too
You couldn't have described me better. Lots of work to do!!! Thansk Mel
Thanks Mel Robbins as always great pieces of advice❤
Omg thank you, Mel. ❤ I love the swinging doors metaphor. I will be transparent and admit I have had a 3ft steel door closed and have had the sword in my hand for a very long time. I am committed to dropping the sword and allowing happiness in. I deserve it! ❤
I never liked ypu, Mel, but I do now. You've become real.
One of the amazing things that are said behind your back Mel is -- “Mel Robins said something to me that saved my life not just saved my life - but I was on my would be death bed and she said something that opened my mind and saved my life!!” I say this to everyone and for the rest of my life this will be something said about you Mel ..
Love this episode! Thanks, Mel! Reminded me of this quote - “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”
― Rumi
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Mel- you r real and that’s why I like to listen to you. Thanks for all your input and suggestions!
Dear Mel. My name is Nicolene, and I am from South Africa. I have been following you for a couple of months now and I would just like to say thank for your podcast as it has helped me immensely as i am struggling with depression and anxiety but I am working my ass off to get better without any meds as i know i can. This podcast could not have come at a better time in my life as you answered each and every question i was asking myself of why am i so mad all the time. I know now how i am keeping happiness out of my life and will work daily to try my best to let it in again. Thank you for your support even though you have no idea who i am! All the best with your 2024 and may this year just keep on getting greater. We did in fact wake up this morning;)
South Africa 🇿🇦 ♥️
I feel that I'm so much like you back three years ago. I have the bank vault closed for so long because I don't want to get hurt anymore so I keep the sword up all the time. I've also realized by listening to you that this will not make me happy. I've always wondered why I can't be happy. I retired early, I have a good financial life, my kids are great. I'm my own worst enemy. Not everyone is able to be in the position I'm in. I've let past situations dictate my negative thoughts and emotions. It's time I take control and take ownership. This is my life and my one any only life..... I am going to open the swinging doors. You are such an inspiration. I just love you!
Yes we block happiness because not only do we have to let it in. We think we are not worthy.
Yep, it's taken me many years to understand!
Thank you Mel, I focus too much on negative things not done, instead of saying thank you for things that get done. Love you for all your positive things you teach.
Thank you Mel….for all your support and encouragement….& sharing your love🫶🏽
I've spent years cultivating this feeling because I had nothing else. I am glad that I did.
Wow! You have no idea how much I needed to hear this. I have spent most of my life chasing the thing that would finally make me happy! I have been working on looking inward now for a while and it's been working but your summary of the 3 points and making a friction list is exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you Mel! You are my Monday morning magic and my soul sister! I love you so frickin much!!
I guess the next question is, "Why do people block happiness?" Afraid of vulnerability, not feeling worthy of happiness, not wanting to let go of all the things you think you're supposed to be responsible for? Is some of it brain chemistry responding to keep us safe? This is such a great topic to unpack!! ❤ For some, it seems like hypervigilence or always "waiting for the other shoe to fall" type of response that turns into a lifelong commitment to that emotion.
This would be a great podcast Mel!
For me, I'm afraid of being vulnerable that someone will eventually take advantage of me by lying or cheating. I need to believe that no all people are like that and it's not fair to them or me.
Mel thank you. You articulated so much of what I was feeling & thinking. Thanks for your honesty, humour & insight 🙏💓
You are a beautiful soul! Thank you for helping us and for the love you are sending!❤
I just got back to work today after the holiday and Im back in the rut. I had no motivation to do anything, I wanted to cry. I dont hate my job because it's soft and I get to sit in an airconditioned office but I hate where I sit and the job itself was never part of the dream for my life, but I lack the confidence and in-roads to get into the field I want to at my age. I found myself repeating the pattern of the past year, wake up and run out the door, not eating during the day, binging on junk when I got home. Havent completed all the work for the day and I find myself struggling to do any work at the office with all the people around me and the load of work and having to mentor people when I have no time to mentor people. I'm already so tired and upset😭😭😭
One more thing that this podcast helped me to remember is to be happy with the moment you are in. Just enjoy what you are doing at the moment you are doing it. Don't worry about what you need to do next, just take a sec to enjoy what you are doing right now. This helped me a lot and I try so hard to get my sister to do this but she just can't! 😞
I need to learn this.
I absolutely loved that answer you gave the young mother. She was besting herself up for NOTHING. I was so proud of you telling her she was being SUCCESSFUL. Be thankful for all the victories. That was such a great interview.i love you
Your video was so much more to the heart of many issues than any therapist, counselor, whatever, I've watched or seen.
How is it that you are so inciteful? Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
You are so amazing❣️I just love you and your energy❣️thank you for being here💕
Mel Robins I want to thank you for parting the clouds of confusion and frustration in my mind about a personal issue. In all my self doubt and self criticism- you have , in 1 video, made me feel valid, understood, human, relieved beyond belief, and given me a psychological exhalation. Thank you a thousand times. Now where do I go and what do I do with my newfound knowledge. I’ll figure it out, but wow wow wow I feel like a little child who needed glasses and finally an adult put glasses on my face and said see??see!!!! I could kiss you. God bless you x
I didn't realize that from 50:40 and on has never been spoken to me. It never occurred to me until l heard it.. until you said it. Ive told others this many times, because it's exactly what I need to here myself. Thank you Mel for such powerful podcast.
Thank you for all you do. I appreciate you being my best friend that I can listen to everyday & every morning during my morning routine. You help me so much.
MEL....Thank you so much, I am there for so many years. I am going to breathe and listen to this over and over and learn, because I want to find peace and happiness from within the eye of the storm.
I think it's awesome that you asked about the "I love you'" part. I always leave the office and say, "Love ya, bye!" 75% of my phone calls with friends end that way. I think it comes from my aunts and grandparents for sure. I grew up in a traumatic home, my mom often said she loved me but honestly sometimes I wonder if she even knew how. I say I love you because I don't want anyone to ever have a last moment with me and wonder later if I appreciated them and cared about them. Thanks for all you do Mel, Love ya, bye! :D
Thank you Mel; I love you and appreciate your work and support to help us to reach our goals and be happy. It has been rough, lost our Father the day after Christmas and our Mom has dementia and doesn’t know us. We are all separated due to our oldest sister not honoring our Father’s wishes. I let her have it because it truly hurt and felt like she slapped me and our TransBrother in the face since we were living our lives differently from her life and we knew she didn’t approve but we both learned that day just how cruel she could be.
2024 Resolution❤ is Find Peace🙏 within myself. Amen.🙏 Thanks Mel.👏
Beautiful story about your son Oakley! Thank you for sharing that…🥰
I'm just started listening & I could tell u before even going deeper... it's me, yeah unfortunately it's me who are you talking about.. thank you Mel
Thank you for pointing out the root of this problem Mel! I have never heard those three words from my parents. Thanks to you I’ve decided to let the sunhine in..
I thought I was the only one feeling this way...Thank u for sharing
God Bless you and all people listening here to you allways 🙏🙏🙏you are so clear and i love to lusten and lurn from you ❤ Happyness ,joy , succes ,proserytty to you and to Entire pkanrtvi wish from my hearth ❤🙏🙏🙏
Thank you Mel. This is my daily life. I’m struggling with anxiety and ADHD and I’m just trying to find myself. I love you ❤
Good points Mel. My happiness comes from having God in my life. I always have him to turn to in hard times. It works and keeps me going.
Thanks for helping me realize that I really am happy. The only unhappy problem I relate with is the door. Only mine is not just a vault door, it is a brick wall! I've been working on it for years though and know its there. Thank you for the reminder to make it into a door that swings!! XOXO 🙂
Happiness = Peace of Mind. I did not figure this out until later in life.
I love your work Mel. You have helped me so much with my journey. Im always amazed every time I listen to your podcast. Thank you for all you do. Love you my friend!
This episode was absolutely the wake up call I needed. I am that hurricane living behind the big vault door making excuses for why my bullshit is always someone else’s problem. Thank you Mel for giving me the homework to not only own my bullshit but how to change my doors.❤
fantastic, Mel. love, love, loved this. thank you. great reminders and lots of new ones. terrific metaphors, especially the swinging doors,💙🌟
thanks again Mel for all your helpful advice and inspiration and hope that things can get better with effort on my part.. I do see things improving in my life and I feel grateful and blessed 😊
Using the Option Process and its five questions moves me to happiness fast; what I had to learn was not to feel guilty about feeling happy. The first time I experienced that happiness, I honestly felt lost in space and watched myself pull in the unhappiness because it felt familiar.
Reminds of my days of being a restaurant manager ; especially on the floor during peek meal periods. I was the eye of the hurricane! I had to set the mood. Contentment is a choice.
This could not have come at a better time! Mel, I love your podcasts! Why do we sabotage ourselves? I have resolved to make this year the best ever, regardless of what is going on in my life. It is up to me and me only. I deserve this and owe it to myself ❤️. Scared to feel good again in case….tradedy strikes again….WOW! You hit the nail on the head….😢
Thank you Mel❤️
lol. Here I thought I was just grumpy because I was getting older! I will let the doors swing open, drop the sword, and say “thank you” to any compliment!
You made me cry !!! Thank you for your precious words xx I love you too xx
Oh Lord did I need to listen to this call today. Thank you so much Mel. Love you and beyond grateful for your insights and brilliance.
I love you Mel! I treasure your podcasts. You speak from the heart and make every topic relateable. Thank you!
When I was married to a narcissist that blocked my happiness and the hamster wheel was going. I'm so glad he filed. He didn't want to move on because he stayed in my house. My house I owed before we were married. After that he left, I was able to heal and use the let them theory!
thank you mel really needed to hear this today xxxxxx
You are the best!!! I have a yoga instructor turn me on to your podcast. I can’t wait to hear each new one. Your a God send I’m very thankful
Happiness is a byproduct of living with a purpose
Hi Mel, I’m listening to your podcast about happiness, and the car in front of me has a license plate that says great joy, I definitely thought that was a sign!
I don’t know how to be happy and I am afraid so glad I was introduced to your work
Thank you Mel for your honesty. I relate so much to what you are saying on this video and on so many other videos too. I am open to learning and change. This is the year for reflection, personal growth and greatness. You are just frigging amazing!!
I so do the bank vault too early door close thing! My boyfriend and I are long distance and we do these amazing things together as he works as a pilot and I am on his flight benefits. We go see these fantastic places and concerts and have the best time.... but I will literally start thinking about us being apart again and having to say goodbye the night before and get all worked up! It ruins the precious time we have and while I am getting better, MAN that's so relatable. Thanks for not making me feel alone, Mel... it's nice when someone else gets it.
EDIT: dang it I do the sword thing too! 31:09 hypervigilance is real (and extra bad when you try and go back to normal world from LE world). Daily life hasnt been just... enjoyable... in years.
When I fellow your podcast..You make my day all the time ❤
Mel, this podcast hit home like a sledgehammer. I completely relate to living in your head, focusing on what's wrong, etc. It really is a happiness blocker. Good sharing and recommendations on how to fix. This was a Gem 🙏🙏🙏🌞
Omg. This is me all the time. I am going to drop the scord. I am always ready for thr negative that comes my way since I was a child.
Thanks for this tough love podcast today. You really spoke to me. I am always clenching the sword. I'm going to work hard to put it down. Thanks also for sharing your story and your vulnerability and for being so relatable.
I am listening, jot it down and share to my students everything that I can share about what I have learned or what I am learning from you now.❤
I am so grateful to knew your channel. I have shared your videos and channel to all my students here in Korea at Community Cententers I am teaching now.
I LOVE YOU TOO MEL!🙌
Mel, how is it that you ALWAYS know what your followers need to hear, precisely when they need to hear it??!! I have been thinking about creating some sort of social media content entitled “CALL IT OUT” where call out the BS I see or experience in this world. I guess episode 1 would start with ME!! Thanks again for this video. I’ve shared, per usual. Love you!
One of the best episodes! You are like the best friend that is completely honest and holds me accountable for me. ❤
Love you Mel! Thank you. ❤❤❤
Honestly, what Mel is referring to is not so much happiness, but enlightenment. It's to realize who you truly are, and to realize how you have not been living authentically. How you have been running from you you really are -- chasing degrees, jobs, relationships, money to fill the void.
It's to realize you have been listening to and identifying with your ego, which is not who you truly are.
"Enlightenment is a destructive process. It has nothing to do with becoming better or being happier. Enlightenment is the crumbling away of untruth. It's seeing through the facade of pretense." - Adyashanti
Hi Mel! I love your podcast and so appreciate how real you are. You sharing that you were creating all this misery for yourself really unlocked something in me realizing how I am actively blocking my own happiness too! I will take your techniques and apply them to my life and I already feel that 2024 will be the year I am truly happy from the inside out! ❤😊
Wow.. love the Podcast. Thank you. Enjoyed Hearing those words.🙏🏻
Great story about Oakley at the end.
I'm only a third of the way into the episode, but I can I have this clam inside no problem, I have worked to get here and I can absolutely find calm and happiness inside when there is problem after problem after problem but it doesn't change anything for me I would say it is a very useful tool for parenting my children because they feel safe and happy and they see a strong mom who isn't panicking but I kind of always thought that if you can achieve this state that somehow that if I can recognise and give myself grace and what not , that god or the universe will make things a bit better but it doesn't.... so much is wrong and I'm trying so so so hard and now I feel ridiculous sometimes because there is just so much wrong so much to worry about and I cant work any harder then I am I can pay myself on the back but now I am calm in all this mess , I don't even know if it's right to feel that calm. Because things are so bad like I feel like isas more productive when I would panic like how I was years ago. I don't know what I'm doing
I loved this podcast especially the part about swinging doors which I’m going to be visualizing everyday. I also love your outfit, hair, makeup, and jewelry in this episode!
Of the three things, although I identify with carrying a sword in your hand all the time anticipating conflict more, I can say I also identify with the other two. It's almost like I don't know how to be happy, at least now I know the only person in my way is myself. Really good advice, thanks.
❤Hi Mel♥ I really appreciate you
for sharing your effective, useful, helpful video.
Stay blessed and healthy♥
Thank you Mel - really needed this, "pop up in the eye of a storm"
"If peace is really what you want, then you will choose peace." - Eckhart Tolle, 'A New Earth'
Most people won't admit this, but they do not actually want peace. They get off on drama, chaos, and even their own misery, because these things give the ego life.
Once you realize that you are NOT your ego, you will realize that your entire life, in many ways, has not truly been your own.
That is when you awaken to who/what you truly are. Often, it takes destruction and a massive ego death to come to this awareness, and to awaken.
You’re describing my life in a way that I couldn’t.
You always motivate me thanks for your kind words ❤and I come to UA-cam to watch your videos are really helpful 🥰
Mel - We are twins, EXCEPT I don't have your wonderful family. I so wish I could have a session with you. I live my life like I am in my 40's BUT...I am turning 70 on 2/5. As someone who was sick in bed when I hit 30 and just about every year since. Then later I lament how I wish I was the age I was so upset about. It has driven me crazy and others. One male friend got so frustrated with me that he sent me to his favorite psychic who told me something bizarre. I have had walls up and have so much love to give but have been alone really my entire afult life. This is SUCH a crucial time for me and need to get your input. THIS SESSION IS 100% ME!
I understand your hurricane
My daughter moved to San Francisco and is getting married
She bought a house out there and will be staying
So when they come home for Christmas 🎄 I get so excited
I spend a month or more getting ready buying presents stockings and stocking the kitchen with all their favorite foods drinks and snacks
Plan things to do and people to visit
Then I start to get sad 😢about three days before she leaves NYC to go back to San Francisco
I truly try to slow my role and live in the moment
My husband always says don’t cry we will see her in a few months
My heart breaks and I still after five years miss her so much
We speak everyday and check in
Grateful for FaceTime so i can see her and share life with her
Wish I could live closer so I could help her and enjoy her
Life is like a roller coaster 🎢
I have my husband still working my son lives in our apartment saving for a house and my 83 year old mother who lives with us
So Mel is visit twice a year and she comes home twice a year
I am so grateful I raised to amazing children with great jobs
Retired teacher who was planning on helping to raise grandchildren when the time blesses us
Thank you ! Excellent advice and tips
Right to the core of it! You are amazing in explaining these sensitive concepts, it shows the wisdom gained after so much working with yourself! Thank you for sharing, love you!! 🤗 🤗
Thanks!
Wow nice good job I'm respect your foundation trust nice good luck
What can I say. You speak to my heart. I have been trying to build a business for 2 years and I keep getting in my way . I love the swinging doors 😂
Thank you , you’re a blessing!
New Subscriber here! Gratefulness brings me happiness, appreciation , think before any reaction !
The most amazing analogy !! 🎉 THANK YOU !!
Love you Mel!! BUT the profanity is rough!! Funny, but rough. LOL!! Thanks for all you do to help us become BETTER!! Blessings!!
Hoda is absolutely right. I have been in the eye of a hurricane and it is a stunning event. But you know you are about to be hit from the other direction and you brace for it. Life comes at you in all directions and only you can control your reaction to it.
Good grief it was like a clone of myself at around minute 27, 28. I've been doing this for YEARS! I'M exhausted. I gotta get out of my own way, I just turned 58 on the 5th and it's way past time.
Tony Robbins says what’s wrong is always available- So is what’s right. You feel what you focus on!
I so needed to hear this today! Thank you, Mel! ❤
This is amazing and I definitely needed to hear it. Thank you Mel!