I relate to everything you are saying. What happens when you're not actually safe though? & your heart is telling you to get the heck away from where you are? I don't trust my intuition in the situations that involve me not being safe.. spiritual or otherwise. I ignore the red flags that my head/heart tries to tell me, 9 times out of 10 and mistake it as the devil trying to keep me from my blessings.
Melissa Renée, You need to be in a safe place to work through it! Otherwise you're kept in survival mode/perpetual confusion and declining health. You're not able to process it & do deep soul searching & develop trust in yourself. I didn't get it till I was seriously ill & barley able to care for myself. But thankful I was living alone. Consider the benefit of one session with Lisa to get clarity and examine choices to help you get on stable ground.
I used to think so, too. Especially the devil-question. Then I realised that the devil wants to destroy love. And the relationship I was in, certainly didn't qualify as Love. So I trusted my gut, trusting in that voice that said: G.E.T. O.U.T. And it is the best decision I ever made. My pay-out was inner peace and many of my physical symptoms disappearing (ulcer, back pain, eye infection,... which I now realise, from a metaphysical POV: I couldn't stomach what was going on (ulcer), feeling the lack of support, I wasn't giving mySelf (lower back pain), and the fact that I couldn't ignore what I had experienced and information I had been given from behind the scenes of my life, without selling my soul (eye infection). I hope this helps you to become the only sovereign authority in the movie of your life. 🙏🏽💜
Physically abusive and controlling father. Loveless mother. The result for me is living my life with cptsd and a fawn responding co-dependent. Thanks Mum and dad. Thank god for the internet and people like Lisa and many others who can explain the dis function i grew up in and the end result of it. But most of all the way to heal from it. Thank you ❤️
So true, Steve! I am 60 and have 6 brothers and sisters, I am the middle child of a Grandiose Narc father, and mother was a codependent, trauma bonded from her own Italian father,and everything had to be perfect. Just recently I started standing up for myself instead of people pleasing.
Can you imagine telling a 3 year old that they're too emotional, and then reinforcing it every single day for 58 years. Narcassistic, empty mother...me, I'm an intuitive.
Idk if someone wants and requests me to trust them I am running. My husband and his family cornered me and wanted to to trust them and tell them things and told me no one is out to get you. I grew up in a small town and my mother was one of the town drunks. Was a vicious place. Well husband and his parents just destroyed me after me trying to trust because I was told I was broken. I marry into a narc family. Great.
My parents did the same to me. I was in a relationship with the wrong guy. but somehow something in my brain told me not to give in. He would tell me "I love you, so you must be with me." I never wanted to be with him and knew in my heart it's temporary and ended it when he kept insisting I marry him. Few years later I met the love of my life and it hurts my narc mom that I am happy.
Jealous parents are the worst. How does one tell these idiots that the success of the child reflects well on them. Just like the success of the employees reflects well on their manager who directs, encourages, and support his/her subordinates to make the team successful.
@@sonnyca yep I was disowned because I was abused and became an alcoholic and SHAMED them by going to rehab and staying clean now 7 years!....smh. It doesnt matter. I'm old now and life to short for dissension!
My meditative mantra… “I am worthy. I love myself. I am grateful. I am safe & I am strong” I do this in 4 count box breathing while visualizing my peaceful space. I do it first thing in the morning, last thing at night & anytime I feel myself slipping down a fearful rabbit hole or just need grounding in that moment. It has SAVED MY LIFE✊🙏💝
Processing it is SO painful. Working with a compassionate knowledgeable Coach who lived it is far better than working with a psychologist who could possibly be a Narc. Also there's a disconnect because they learned it from a textbook, the professionals are known to take years to make progress but a good coach can guide you through the process better & faster.
@@guylamullins3602 Sorry you went through that on top of dealing with the Narcs in your life. Its better not to deal with the establishment. So much of our lives aren't private any more. I wouldn't want that label as a part of my medical records. It makes you a target to possible Narc MD's.
Unresolved childhood trauma. I didn't know there was even a term. Let alone that you could aquire CPTSD from it. I'm in my 40s and just now taking to a therapist about it. Domestic violence was a common thing in my childhood. No one ever talked to me about it or asked me how it made me feel. I've carried those feelings into all my adult relationships. Vicious cycle. Finally learning and starting to grow. Thank you Lisa
i grew up in a domestic violence household and i feel the same way. i always think why did no one talk to me about when i was older? why did no one ask me how i felt or if i remembered. the whole family knew but it was unspoken. i just asked my grandparents why they didn’t talk to me about it since it’s their son(my father) and they said they didn’t know how. EVERYONE KNEW WHAT WAS GOING ON NO ONE CARED HOW I FELT WATCHING IT EVERYDAY
I had ultimate childhood abuse and at 13 I was really in love with someone but it took me three years to believe this because of the trauma now I am 16 and that person is completely out of my reach I really loved him ..........just wanted to tell this because I don't have any friends and really thankfull for this community ❤️
Write him a letter. Express your emotions and either keep it or burn it in a ritual to release it. Ask your Guardian Angels to have your paths cross again or bring you another True Love. I have loved several men. You are young doll, keep loving your Self and learning!!
Learning to honor yourself, your intuition, and your need to feel safe is a HUGE issue. Please elaborate on this as much as possible. Relationships can easily go off balance when there is codependency and narcissism. They are one sided. If we can learn to pull the reigns in on our own self respect and intuition then It draws us to a more healthy position. This is true for family, friends, professional, etc. I keep finding myself in one sided situations but I must take responsibility for the power and control I freely take from myself and give to others. Honoring the self is key. THANKU!
Being the overly nice guy is mainly a problem when you're unaware, but thanks to you and these videos that problem can be corrected with this awareness, the tricky part is that you then press the pedal to hard and you go from being a nice guy to being a jerk, it takes a bit of time to find the balance.
Before I was 3 I told my Granny that I hated my Dad. She said you can't hate him, he's your Father. I don't know why but I can't seem to let go of that one.
I’ve had similar feelings towards both parents growing up, frequently towards my mom. I remember as a kid etching “ I hate you mom“ on the polished wooden table passed on through family generations. The other week I had a dream where I stated, “I hate you mom for being so helpless towards me.” I had another dream not long ago where my youngest brother and I asked her why she never hugged or kissed us growing up, then she got angry and the dream ended. Coming to understand how my mom was behaving from her conditioning and reacting from her pain helps give rise to compassion, for her and for myself for having such seemingly inappropriate emotions that are totally valid and appropriate.
The best revenge is to forgive. UNFORGIVENESS is a poison that we swallow while hoping our offenders die. FORGIVENESS is not easy but trying to understand that they also must of been hurt in some way can help. Hurt people HURT (OTHER) PEOPLE. Of course thats not always the case but generally its true.. Another thing that can help us get free from the poison of UNFORGIVENESS is to write your offenders a letter and pretend you are going to send it-dont hold anything back. Then either read it to a trusted friend as if they were the offender/offenders. This can really help believe it or not. I have found understanding the offenders hurt/pain can really make a difference . Also just saying this off and on whether you FEEL like it or NOT " GOD BLESS _____"(put their name/names in " Hope this helps . I too had to forgive my Father for the hurts and wounds and trauma he left me with. Most people are not evil just hurt and wounded too (though theres a lot more evil people now than ever).
I can totally relate to this topic, Lisa. I was emotionally neglected by my mother who was emotionally closed off. I felt like I never got the emotional love and support I feel that most mothers give to their children. It has messed me up my entire life. I had spent a lot of my childhood wanting a female to give me that love I was missing. I figured out that all throughout my schooling when I tried to get that love from my female classmates it's like they sensed it and wanted nothing to do with me. For the longest time. I started feeling something was wrong with me.
Unfortunately in the USA being "needy" is like coming after people with a gun -they run . Its sad ...but true. Maybe you dont live in the USA ... i think the same attitude is spreading now to other places. Nurture your self . If you are catholic ask Mary (Jesus mother ) to be your mother-i onow it sounds crazy but it helps. God bless you dear one
Lisa it seems like you are recording from some type of room in heaven. Your aura is angelic. Your tips are life changing! Your wisdom is fulfilling and comforting. Your words are so powerful and healing. You truly have a gift and I am so grateful for you sharing with us. You helped me understand my relationship with my myself and with my mom. Thank you lisa 💕
I’m convinced tht I’m codependent...I recently started going to al-anon meetings and I will also be seeing a therapist soon. My mom verbally and emotionally abused me as a child. There was some physical abuse also...but the scars from that are nothing compared to the emotional ones. The chaos my sisters and I grew up in...I had no idea the lasting impact it would have on any of us. I’m 50 and I have nothing left to give...I am physically and mentally exhausted. I just found your UA-cam channel...answered prayers. Thank you❤️
@@looweegee252 not everyone...all of us within this (mental health/therapy/self-help) community know that abuse always extends beyond physical. even physical abuse leaves emotional scars.
Thank you for this. I recently had a bad breakdown, and ran away to my hometown. Drove for eight hours to get there, had no idea why. I figured out while I was up there that I go back because I'm looking for the love I did not feel from my mother as a child. I found him -- he was on a school playground I used to play on at age 5 and he's been there for 30 years because he didn't feel safe at home or anywhere else. I'm the age now my mother was when I was 5, and I realized I have to adopt him and treat him the way he needed and didn't get. I have to move forward. Everything you've mentioned, from the relationship issues to the mistrust of intuition, entered into my head afterward - and then next week, I find your videos. Life is weird. Cheers
I've always had excellent instincts, I now realise in hindsight. Yet, ever since I gave my life to God, my intuition is gone. It's more like I know what is going on, not a feeling. And I find out that I am right each time. I keep that to myself at home, because I am in a narc web. I am not in a safe situation but have no viable option to leave, though I know I must go. Because of what they did to me years ago, I have a financial problem that makes me wonder how I will still be able to pay the necessary bills. But, I have faith. The Lord literally saved my daughter from harm, by bringing something important to my attention in time to stop it. But it is difficult living with people who don't think the way that a reasonably healthy person would. It is scary sometimes. The shelters here are full, so I feel stuck. One step at a time I say. There is a lot going on in my situation, so I can't get into it here in comments, but I will just say, it's not easy to be around narcissists. I live with one, and next door to another. Both are related. They triangulate me. They've been that way since I was little and I am not the only one who got hurt by it. I didn't know it was a personality disorder, despite majoring in Psychology in college. So it's not something every one understands unless someone has dealt with it.
“It’s more like I know what is going on, not [just] a feeling.” _ “Verily, verily, I say unto thee, We speak that we do _know,_ and testify that we have seen.” - Jesus (JN 3:11) But ye have an unction from the Holy One, and ye _know_ all things. I have not written unto you because ye know not the truth, but because ye _know_ it, and that no lie is of the truth. 1 JN 2:20 have a nice day
I remember when I emigrated to Australia at 20; I thought maybe my mother would miss me. She didn’t. I remember when I had my first child adopted; the reason was I wanted her to be ‘safe.’ Now I know why I felt that. I loved her so much. but I had this tremendous fear and shame. ❤
This is one of the best videos I have watched about healing childhood trauma. I grew up in a very dysfunctional home and my mom is a narcissist and my dad was a recovering alcoholic. As a child, my feelings were always denied by my parents. If my siblings and I didnt want to eat onions or lettuce, my mom would get angry and blame our dislike of certain foods on my dad. I recently went to a psychic medium and she kept repeating over and over that I need to trust my intuition and I wasn't sure where to start until watching this video. Thank you Lisa ❤️
You are not the body or the trauma. You’re the observer of your life You’re the decision maker, the boss of your experience and reality. Like Lisa always says YOU ARE ENOUGH, Enough to heal authentically, Enough to stay aware Enough to think Enough to love and be loved openly.
Thank you sooo much Lisa 🙏 finally everything started make sense after listening your priceless information. I always felt so much guilt being angry at my mother. I finally asked her if she slept with my first husband, she suddenly became sick and told my ant that im rocking the boat and im jealous ungrateful daughter
I had such a similar experience where I got so sick in every way. I saw every doctor, every therapist, took every medication before I turned away from western medicine and sought healers. Now I know that my body was falling apart because I was not honoring my needs and I was trying to plow through this marriage with a full blown narcissist. You must honor mind, body and spirit!
I relate to your mum a lot . If it wasn’t fir your videos I’d probably wouldn’t know my patterns and get older in a similar relationship like your parents. Thank you for helping us all ❤️
My ex-wife and I honeymooned in Hawaii too on the big island 🤙 I splurged and booked an oceanfront room and we were treated well by the hotel staff. We had an amazing time. I had a hard time during my divorce fifteen years ago and that made me so bitter and resentful. I have since then learned that relationships are not forever. Best way to carry on with life is to hold on to all the good memories and experiences and discard the rest. I barely have a handful of memories with my father. He’s a troubled man who passed on his hurt to me.
Dr. Bessel van der Kolk researches and promotes what you’re saying, what you practiced with meditation. I like it when people I admire share information that dove tails.
Sadly, so much of this video was like you were looking into my window, as a child and relating what you saw. I so appreciate you helping shed light in the why's as well as practical support for us to recalibrate to a much calmer, healthier homeostasis.❤
When my ex told me that “we should just bag it” I was elated! I don’t think I could have initiated it because of my guilt, but after he said that, I was like YES! I had permission to leave. Then when he received the divorce papers, he thought I was doing that to get to him. He thought I was joking. Ahhh NO! It took me 3 years to finally get rid of him. But once he signed the papers I felt like this giant weight was lifted from my shoulders. It felt so good to finally be free from him. By the time I took action, I had been so deeply weakened and damaged that I really couldn’t see clearly
This is hands down THE best video of yours I’ve ever watched. Omgoodness I’m so happy and so grateful that I found you years ago and now this last relationship wasn’t a waste. It’s exactly what I needed to come home to myself!
I wish I had been able to understand these things about myself years ago. I spent a lifetime in denial and fear. I've finally woke up and understand but I'm 63 now and it's too late. So sad.
65 and it is never too late to wake up to yourself You cannot have known then but you do know now. So... the only NEVER is NEVER AGAIN, LOL. Have faith in your own resilience. My life has improved drastically now that I know and I am financially stuck with this fool I married. Thank goodness no small kids are the issue anymore.
Try to and work on the number of years you’ve been alive . You are still you . So it’s never too late . Society is very good at trying to present that age on this earth is an issue . It’s not over until it’s over ♥️Much love and light and you can do this .
You are one of the most influential, helpful, easy to understand life coaches that really helped me learn all the psychology behind the trauma. Thank you!
i will never forget when my own mother literally called me "nasty" to my face... all because i said a curse word by accident-just one of the many ways i experienced my mother's love, NOT... while growing up and still to this day.. why i will never understand
Lisa. I so love you. In my opinion, you are so balanced & so right on. I had been talking to God, (as a one-sided conversation, for weeks about all kinds of stuff, whether He would choose to talk to me I not. (And. This stuff is too deep & this stuff is too private anyway to share with the average bear. ( I have 3, really deep & spiritually mature mentors; and it's always a 2-way street, mutual mentoring,) but they are already too burdened with their own stuff & lots of other people dealing with "much smaller stuff" kind of messes. So, in reality peopleno longer have time to give each other the time of day! If you ever saw "Bruce Almighty with Jim Carey, ,(hysterical (God is the only One who has the ability to hear & track with all people all the time, day or night,. He tracks with me 24/7 most of the time I hear phrases or song lyrics sung by famous artist . Those lyrics are right on. Lisa, I remember a time, shortly after vacating high school, when I was so sick withthem. healthr problems. 3 of my doctors, really had respect for me & I them. They actually sat on their own examining room tables, along side of me took my left hand and were actually looking into my eyes. They all told me, I don't know why you are so sick. You're much too young to be having any of these problems. They all asked me if I would like to talk about whatever was bothering me. Amazing! They actually took time and sctually cared about me. How many doctors really have much time to speak with their patients. They're usually too swamped with too many patients. Lisa, one item you spoke about; becoming extremely sick because of really evil parenting, (which I had, in spades,) was once a real reality. So much so, that one of them asked me if I would like to go with him and a few of his friends, on a 40 foot catch sailing trip for one week. Hell yes. Had a blast. I became the one in charge of the anchor. (Which was lots of fun.) And doing all the cooking in the galley, because everyone else would get sea sick, actually puking, where I would not. Birds came on deck sat right next to me, Whales swam along side of us, We all went fishing & diving. My favorite place to sit on thIs vessel was on the bow sprit, wIth an ice cold beer, or a sissy drink like hot buttered rum, and being dunked in the ice cold water. (Now, that was fun.) None of us wanted to come back. When I came back, I removed myself from all the work situations, other people try to stick you with because you are a certain gender,, left the area. Then, after asking Him, God showed & told me whatt He created me for. He then led me & provided me for all the right "fits" for me and I never looked.I became a happy camper. They could all stick it. (Certainly, not this sweet & fun loving doctor. He could see, all I needed was some rip roaring fun & provided it.)
This is all so true! My mom has dementia and Alzheimer’s and I know her disease is the result of my father’s mental/psychological abuse, coercion and manipulation over the last 60 years. Her brain is mush. And I was clearly headed in that direction with my soon-to-be ex-husband!
With my ex, I didn't know WHAT was wrong, something was off, but I excused it because of his own child sexual abuse and thought I could help him heal. Lots of commitment phobic men before that...I didn't know people behaved like that. We need more education at an elementary school level and on, about good and bad communication, what verbal abuse is. I guess "safe touch" and bullying have started to fill those holes.
Thank you Lisa for all your wisdom you share. I finally got purchased "The Road Back to Me". In under a weeks time I am 3/4 of the way through the book. I definitely can relate to some of your experiences. I am becoming more at peace with myself than I ever have.
I’m glad you said this I have narcissistic and BPD traits yes I was married to a abusive serial cheater but I as well was a partner in the toxic dance . I’m learning new ways to think and work through my many triggers and abandonment issues. I was a narcissistic/ co dependent/ people pleaser with very little empathy but could be the abuser as well as the victim. In the end my ex broke me down to bits . I questioned my sanity for years but was in cognitive dissonance about him and myself. I feel like those with narcissistic traits idealize others they believe they have found the perfect partner but resentment takes over and the switch flips any empathy or care is gone and the partner is replaced . It is almost child like entitlement and a temper tantrum. They are highly manipulative because they learned that is survival in childhood, I began to grow and wanted to work out issues and communicate like a adult , my ex so used to hiding his real self in childhood only wanted someone who saw him as not flawed and he wanted someone who he could have dependent on him , he gets much younger women I believe because they look up to him and they are wanting to be mothers one day so they baby him as well .
Just wanna say, Thank You. I believe this message and information will also combat racism, which is rooted in hate & Projection as a result of narcissistic thinking. You're greatly appreciated. Continue Courageously
What I struggle with is genuinely believing I'm actually safe. If I'm in my home and my doors are locked and curtains closed, I feel safe. But I take one step outside, and my anxiety goes through the roof. I don't know how to feel safe when outside knowing anything can happen. Anyone can do something. I feel like its not that I subconsciously feel unsafe, I genuinely believe I (or anybody, really) can't ever be safe when out in public
Father's that encourage their sons and participate with their sons, complimenting them MORE often than ridiculing or scolding them, WILL make their sons FAR MORE SUCCESSFUL, and eternally grateful for such a father
As a species,at one time we recognized "anxiety"as not panic ,but us turning into our badass mode because we were threatened or attacked,because our brain slows things down,our hearts pump more blood to 5he muscles, and brain,so we become super cognisant of our surroundings,even knowing what is approaching from around the corner,My there is everything is energy,even emotions,and how we chanel 5hat is on us,but I wish I dealt with anxiety like that a long time ago,
It is very good to know that there are psychiatrist or psychologist that believe in quantum science and Spirituality, I believe that we are light waves and electric. I am experiencing this quantum field now where I observe things, with or without guidance. To be a witness of God is an honorable position.
Lisa this is BRILLIANT!! It took a lot of work to reprogram my subconscious to tap into my gut feelings and go for what I know. Your release the guilt and shame meditations were a cornerstone of my healing journey. I released the Jedi Mind Tricksters and stopped my contortionist tendency. Now I bet on me and leave from the inside out. Namaste to you dear one!!
Thanks for sharing Lisa. Being the 4th born of 6 children and denied the right of speaking up about anything led to me being sexually abused by the age of 6. I endured the punishment of having things put in my ears so I wouldn't repeat what I have heard in my family. Of course the lost of my hearing came to speak impairment and all the shame with it. I still fear the conflict and was robbed of having any goals as a child. I didn't even finish the 7th grade and was arrested for drugs at the age of 15. I thought it was a curse for me to have anything of my own growing up. So I started living a double life and seeing the life other people were having and a relative who was my mother sister and out to start gaining off me once I had quit school and started working. Made it be known that the 2 bedroom house was put in my name as a infant by the absent father before divorcing my mother. And became a blessing. I had just turned 17 and came home to a empty house with nothing but a few clothes. I decided that I was going to try to join the navy and since I was 17 I was given a GED and a civil service test before the physical, and was denied because of my hearing. But I went on to work and put myself through technical school before turning 18. That would take a turn to the worse when the absent father had heard about the things that Ive done accomplish he had to do something to destroy my outcome and make it his. He was promising more money and the world he wanted. I made the 500 mile trip to be the absent father and he was a great liar to have hooked me into making that move. I resorted to repeating the words he said to get me to make that move to the people who were working with him. The partnership he suckered someone into was over with and he was down to one other person working for him besides myself, and Thankfully that person didn't like him and made it known within the first half hour of being around of me. We hit it off immediately after I said that I didn't like him too. Although he was a donor that lied to get me to move 500 miles. I will never forget what he said. I'm going to teach you something nobody can take away from you. You can make a good living by doing it and don't let anyone pay you less than your work is worth. Since he thinks he dumped you on me for some free training, he was going to make sure that I was paid the same as him. So for the next couple of months, I was taught by the best and my new best friend. He took the responsibility of paying me and I gave my father the lies back and didn't tell him how much my friend was paying me, just kept on with his lies, once you learn you can make some good money. I lost contact with my Good friend Jeff M. decades ago and left that deadbeat father the same way he did when I got there. Nothing before and nothing when I left him. So if intuition owning my own business and since I'm disabled and not throwing the towel in the game of life for a good while to come still. I hope to be able to teach others how to be the best in their lives and not to sell themselves short, and although I had to LIE to a demon of a father, I would maintain my self respect.
I have a hard time making decisions in general. I can be very decisive. Sometimes I deliberate a long time trying to make a decision and then when I finally do, I second-guess myself.
Because wisdom and knowledge are not the same thing, knowledge is just the ability to recall something we have read or been told,wisdom is the ability of recalling useful data from a personal experience.
It's scary how our experiences are almost the same. Narcissists/codependents are like copy/paste.. same behavior regardless of their country, culture etc. Wow
Lisa, you have totally helped me and woke me up to many things. I have seen in my family and friends in how they are narsitic. When I was growing up. I loved theater and acting. Some in my family. Would be you know people will think you gay. Only gay guys are in theater . You never going to make a good living. And a starving artist. I came from a verbally and physical abusive family. You help me stand up for myself and stop the circle . Thank you so much.
First of all, thank you! Secondly, as someone who was raised by a couple of narcissist, you have answered so many questions for me that I’ve had for a long time now. As a parent, I am always looking for ways to break the horrible family cycle that just keeps getting passed down through generations. Thanks again, sorry for the ramble.
gillian260, Omgosh! Isn’t that crazy? Same here! Was sexually assaulted at 12 on my way walking down my street, I ran for blocks with him chasing me, I got home terrified and my dad yells at me, “what the hell is wrong with you?”, well needless to say, I stuffed that event way down to my toes. So sad! Saw him again at age 20 and told my boyfriend at the confront him, he was a Narcissist also, nobody helped stand up for me! Thank you, God for this channel and my support group here! Love to you all! 💕 peace and safety💝
Thanks for addressing this issue, it totally relates and I like the color of your dress. It’s refreshing to know that we don’t have to turn into our parents and with awareness can become who we were destined to become.
yes, I am working through trust issues now, rewiring my brain to know I am worthy and lovable. Thank you Lisa, I need this wise counsel, you pop up and counsel the hell out of me! haha! thank you so much xxxx
This was an excellent video teaching once again Lisa! So helpful. I appreciate you sharing your personal trauma that resulted in your codependency. I have been on this healing journey for a longtime and so I could receive what you are sharing. It makes perfect sense to me. My mother had absolutely no self-awareness how her behavior affected us, her children. She always justified and rationalized her behavior and attitude and it was always someone else's fault, usually us kids or our Dad. I will rewatch this video because it was so helpful. There have been many times and I still do it. Place my hand on my heart to comfort myself. I like your idea of telling yourself, "I am SAFE!" throughout your day. I will incorporate that. Thank you Lisa for all your words of wisdom to help us move forward. I am going to honor my God-given intuition. I like how you said, " hit the pause button and ask myself what do I want...what do I think, what do I really want to do? So helpful. ❤️
I just broke up with my bf and im trying to change my life for the better. Im learning what my intuition is and what it feels like and looks like and how to trust my intuition. Its that feeling you get that you cant explain. That feeling of somethings wrong even if your not seeing a problem. Your brain picks up on things you dont realize yet and makes you feel the way you do. Trust your first feelings but also think objectively and with your head. Sometimes feelings only cloud your judgement. Im not saying be cold just dont let your emotions and feelings be the tool that is used against you... with your intuition, If there is a feeling, no matter how small, theres a reason why. thats your first basic instincts, the rest that follow are just mere doubts that have been placed in your head by society or the abuser. It turns into excuses for the abuser and your actions become for them and not for yourself. Anything you do is with Them in mind. And it becomes draining. Dont be too caring, its ok to have a little bit of healthy narcissism within yourself... You cant help but feel at blame for putting yourself in that situation but you didnt know. Its not like they teach this in school or our parents teach us. Its not your fault. But once you find out about yourself and the narcisisst then you can choose to either rise or fall... Im choosing to rise and have constant self improvement through knowledge and self care... I appreciate videos like these, you never know how much they truly do help...
Thank you for this excellent video, Lisa. Listening to it this morning has opened new gateways and my world is not as dark and sinister as I was experiencing it as. I am going to listen again right now. This is a powerful message.
you are a legend thank you so much , im no longer sinking , im still im being educated there is some thing in the air i feel lighter discarded 4 weeks ago im no longer blind im going to be ok , yes got some work to do and i relish that . thank you
My mom invited her youngest brother to live with us in 1968. She had 7 sisters and 7 brothers. The family consisted of my parents and my 6 siblings. When it was discovered that my uncle was molesting me, I was blamed. The movie The Sound of Music had inspired me to want to be a Nun like Maria. My dad told me I was too filthy to be a Nun. I was 6 years old. My uncle moved in with another aunt and proceeded to molest my female cousins. The good news is....my dad and I have had breakthroughs and we are good friends now.
I relate to everything you are saying. What happens when you're not actually safe though? & your heart is telling you to get the heck away from where you are? I don't trust my intuition in the situations that involve me not being safe.. spiritual or otherwise. I ignore the red flags that my head/heart tries to tell me, 9 times out of 10 and mistake it as the devil trying to keep me from my blessings.
Melissa Renée, You need to be in a safe place to work through it! Otherwise you're kept in survival mode/perpetual confusion and declining health. You're not able to process it & do deep soul searching & develop trust in yourself. I didn't get it till I was seriously ill & barley able to care for myself. But thankful I was living alone. Consider the benefit of one session with Lisa to get clarity and examine choices to help you get on stable ground.
I used to think so, too. Especially the devil-question.
Then I realised that the devil wants to destroy love.
And the relationship I was in, certainly didn't qualify as Love.
So I trusted my gut, trusting in that voice that said: G.E.T. O.U.T.
And it is the best decision I ever made.
My pay-out was inner peace and many of my physical symptoms disappearing (ulcer, back pain, eye infection,... which I now realise, from a metaphysical POV: I couldn't stomach what was going on (ulcer), feeling the lack of support, I wasn't giving mySelf (lower back pain), and the fact that I couldn't ignore what I had experienced and information I had been given from behind the scenes of my life, without selling my soul (eye infection).
I hope this helps you to become the only sovereign authority in the movie of your life.
🙏🏽💜
@@ceilconstante7813 me too. I'm stuck in emotional nonsafety until I move away.
Your story sounds like my story..and my whole life as beenmlived alone and unloved
@Pedro Ivan Sanchez Cannot. Do not know.
Physically abusive and controlling father. Loveless mother. The result for me is living my life with cptsd and a fawn responding co-dependent. Thanks Mum and dad. Thank god for the internet and people like Lisa and many others who can explain the dis function i grew up in and the end result of it. But most of all the way to heal from it. Thank you ❤️
So true, Steve! I am 60 and have 6 brothers and sisters, I am the middle child of a Grandiose Narc father, and mother was a codependent, trauma bonded from her own Italian father,and everything had to be perfect. Just recently I started standing up for myself instead of people pleasing.
Thank you 🙏🏻 -Lisa tells a story i know about - -She is a true gift to us , :)
Hey guys how do you go no contact with em?
Can you imagine telling a 3 year old that they're too emotional, and then reinforcing it every single day for 58 years. Narcassistic, empty mother...me, I'm an intuitive.
@@AnniesHere-rn5bc me too.
I use the mantra "I am safe, I am loved, I am protected."
Emotionally neglected and abused was the title of my childhood. Yep. I'm protection vs connection.
I am so sorry you endured this pain. I hope you now have some good friends and people in your life who value and appreciate you xxoo
@@susanmcguire4664 thank you Susan. God bless. 🙏
Idk if someone wants and requests me to trust them I am running. My husband and his family cornered me and wanted to to trust them and tell them things and told me no one is out to get you. I grew up in a small town and my mother was one of the town drunks. Was a vicious place. Well husband and his parents just destroyed me after me trying to trust because I was told I was broken. I marry into a narc family. Great.
I feel for all the children I see being emotionally abused.
I wish that one day they will awaken and end these cycles!
My parents did the same to me. I was in a relationship with the wrong guy. but somehow something in my brain told me not to give in. He would tell me "I love you, so you must be with me." I never wanted to be with him and knew in my heart it's temporary and ended it when he kept insisting I marry him. Few years later I met the love of my life and it hurts my narc mom that I am happy.
Yep the narc mother wants you lower than her so she can look like the star
Jealous parents are the worst. How does one tell these idiots that the success of the child reflects well on them. Just like the success of the employees reflects well on their manager who directs, encourages, and support his/her subordinates to make the team successful.
@@sonnyca yep I was disowned because I was abused and became an alcoholic and SHAMED them by going to rehab and staying clean now 7 years!....smh. It doesnt matter. I'm old now and life to short for dissension!
"All of us can be toxic" you can heal! You don't have to be narcissistic EVER again!
My meditative mantra…
“I am worthy. I love myself. I am grateful. I am safe & I am strong”
I do this in 4 count box breathing while visualizing my peaceful space.
I do it first thing in the morning, last thing at night & anytime I feel myself slipping down a fearful rabbit hole or just need grounding in that moment.
It has SAVED MY LIFE✊🙏💝
Processing it is SO painful. Working with a compassionate knowledgeable Coach who lived it is far better than working with a psychologist who could possibly be a Narc. Also there's a disconnect because they learned it from a textbook, the professionals are known to take years to make progress but a good coach can guide you through the process better & faster.
I had one that was narcissistic and misogynistic. Most of his female patients got the BPD label.
@@guylamullins3602 Sorry you went through that on top of dealing with the Narcs in your life. Its better not to deal with the establishment. So much of our lives aren't private any more. I wouldn't want that label as a part of my medical records. It makes you a target to possible Narc MD's.
The Universe has given you an amazing talent in seeing, leaving and describing the Matrix
Unresolved childhood trauma. I didn't know there was even a term. Let alone that you could aquire CPTSD from it. I'm in my 40s and just now taking to a therapist about it. Domestic violence was a common thing in my childhood. No one ever talked to me about it or asked me how it made me feel. I've carried those feelings into all my adult relationships. Vicious cycle. Finally learning and starting to grow. Thank you Lisa
i grew up in a domestic violence household and i feel the same way. i always think why did no one talk to me about when i was older? why did no one ask me how i felt or if i remembered. the whole family knew but it was unspoken. i just asked my grandparents why they didn’t talk to me about it since it’s their son(my father) and they said they didn’t know how. EVERYONE KNEW WHAT WAS GOING ON NO ONE CARED HOW I FELT WATCHING IT EVERYDAY
I had ultimate childhood abuse and at 13 I was really in love with someone but it took me three years to believe this because of the trauma now I am 16 and that person is completely out of my reach I really loved him ..........just wanted to tell this because I don't have any friends and really thankfull for this community ❤️
I understand that well
Write him a letter. Express your emotions and either keep it or burn it in a ritual to release it. Ask your Guardian Angels to have your paths cross again or bring you another True Love. I have loved several men. You are young doll, keep loving your Self and learning!!
Learning to honor yourself, your intuition, and your need to feel safe is a HUGE issue. Please elaborate on this as much as possible. Relationships can easily go off balance when there is codependency and narcissism. They are one sided. If we can learn to pull the reigns in on our own self respect and intuition then It draws us to a more healthy position. This is true for family, friends, professional, etc. I keep finding myself in one sided situations but I must take responsibility for the power and control I freely take from myself and give to others. Honoring the self is key. THANKU!
*reins
Being the overly nice guy is mainly a problem when you're unaware, but thanks to you and these videos that problem can be corrected with this awareness, the tricky part is that you then press the pedal to hard and you go from being a nice guy to being a jerk, it takes a bit of time to find the balance.
I know right! I trust no one now
Dear Lisa,
Thank you for helping me heal my trauma . I am beginning to smile again , such an amazing personal achievement. Thank you.
Before I was 3 I told my Granny that I hated my Dad. She said you can't hate him, he's your Father.
I don't know why but I can't seem to let go of that one.
I would be interested to know if you have a relationship with him anymore now that you are an adult. Have your feelings changed?
I’ve had similar feelings towards both parents growing up, frequently towards my mom.
I remember as a kid etching “ I hate you mom“ on the polished wooden table passed on through family generations.
The other week I had a dream where I stated, “I hate you mom for being so helpless towards me.”
I had another dream not long ago where my youngest brother and I asked her why she never hugged or kissed us growing up, then she got angry and the dream ended.
Coming to understand how my mom was behaving from her conditioning and reacting from her pain helps give rise to compassion, for her and for myself for having such seemingly inappropriate emotions that are totally valid and appropriate.
The best revenge is to forgive. UNFORGIVENESS is a poison that we swallow while hoping our offenders die.
FORGIVENESS is not easy but trying to understand that they also must of been hurt in some way can help.
Hurt people HURT (OTHER) PEOPLE.
Of course thats not always the case but generally its true..
Another thing that can help us get free from the poison of UNFORGIVENESS is to write your offenders a letter and pretend you are going to send it-dont hold anything back.
Then either read it to a trusted friend as if they were the offender/offenders. This can really help believe it or not.
I have found understanding the offenders hurt/pain can really make a difference .
Also just saying this off and on whether you FEEL like it or NOT
" GOD BLESS _____"(put their name/names in "
Hope this helps . I too had to forgive my Father for the hurts and wounds and trauma he left me with.
Most people are not evil just hurt and wounded too (though theres a lot more evil people now than ever).
I can totally relate to this topic, Lisa. I was emotionally neglected by my mother who was emotionally closed off. I felt like I never got the emotional love and support I feel that most mothers give to their children. It has messed me up my entire life. I had spent a lot of my childhood wanting a female to give me that love I was missing. I figured out that all throughout my schooling when I tried to get that love from my female classmates it's like they sensed it and wanted nothing to do with me. For the longest time. I started feeling something was wrong with me.
I can relate
Unfortunately in the USA being "needy" is like coming after people with a gun -they run .
Its sad ...but true.
Maybe you dont live in the USA ... i think the same attitude is spreading now to other places.
Nurture your self . If you are catholic ask Mary (Jesus mother ) to be your mother-i onow it sounds crazy but it helps.
God bless you dear one
Lisa it seems like you are recording from some type of room in heaven. Your aura is angelic. Your tips are life changing! Your wisdom is fulfilling and comforting. Your words are so powerful and healing. You truly have a gift and I am so grateful for you sharing with us. You helped me understand my relationship with my myself and with my mom. Thank you lisa 💕
I’m convinced tht I’m codependent...I recently started going to al-anon meetings and I will also be seeing a therapist soon. My mom verbally and emotionally abused me as a child. There was some physical abuse also...but the scars from that are nothing compared to the emotional ones. The chaos my sisters and I grew up in...I had no idea the lasting impact it would have on any of us. I’m 50 and I have nothing left to give...I am physically and mentally exhausted.
I just found your UA-cam channel...answered prayers. Thank you❤️
Why does everyone pretend that only physical abuse can qualify as abuse?
There is still hope
@@looweegee252 not everyone...all of us within this (mental health/therapy/self-help) community know that abuse always extends beyond physical. even physical abuse leaves emotional scars.
i know all will go well for you, you’re so strong to actively seek help! 💕💕💕
@@angelflorence thanks for reaching out, next time I'll not say everyone ^_^
Thank you for this. I recently had a bad breakdown, and ran away to my hometown. Drove for eight hours to get there, had no idea why. I figured out while I was up there that I go back because I'm looking for the love I did not feel from my mother as a child. I found him -- he was on a school playground I used to play on at age 5 and he's been there for 30 years because he didn't feel safe at home or anywhere else. I'm the age now my mother was when I was 5, and I realized I have to adopt him and treat him the way he needed and didn't get. I have to move forward. Everything you've mentioned, from the relationship issues to the mistrust of intuition, entered into my head afterward - and then next week, I find your videos. Life is weird. Cheers
I've always had excellent instincts, I now realise in hindsight. Yet, ever since I gave my life to God, my intuition is gone. It's more like I know what is going on, not a feeling. And I find out that I am right each time. I keep that to myself at home, because I am in a narc web. I am not in a safe situation but have no viable option to leave, though I know I must go. Because of what they did to me years ago, I have a financial problem that makes me wonder how I will still be able to pay the necessary bills. But, I have faith. The Lord literally saved my daughter from harm, by bringing something important to my attention in time to stop it. But it is difficult living with people who don't think the way that a reasonably healthy person would. It is scary sometimes. The shelters here are full, so I feel stuck. One step at a time I say. There is a lot going on in my situation, so I can't get into it here in comments, but I will just say, it's not easy to be around narcissists. I live with one, and next door to another. Both are related. They triangulate me. They've been that way since I was little and I am not the only one who got hurt by it. I didn't know it was a personality disorder, despite majoring in Psychology in college. So it's not something every one understands unless someone has dealt with it.
“It’s more like I know what is going on, not [just] a feeling.”
_
“Verily, verily, I say unto thee, We speak that we do _know,_ and testify that we have seen.”
- Jesus (JN 3:11)
But ye have an unction from the Holy One, and ye _know_ all things. I have not written unto you because ye know not the truth, but because ye _know_ it, and that no lie is of the truth. 1 JN 2:20
have a nice day
This is the most accurate description/information I've ever heard. We all appreciate the real story, the facts.
I remember when I emigrated to Australia at 20; I thought maybe my mother would miss me.
She didn’t.
I remember when I had my first child adopted; the reason was I wanted her to be ‘safe.’ Now I know why I felt that. I loved her so much. but I had this tremendous fear and shame. ❤
This is one of the best videos I have watched about healing childhood trauma. I grew up in a very dysfunctional home and my mom is a narcissist and my dad was a recovering alcoholic. As a child, my feelings were always denied by my parents. If my siblings and I didnt want to eat onions or lettuce, my mom would get angry and blame our dislike of certain foods on my dad. I recently went to a psychic medium and she kept repeating over and over that I need to trust my intuition and I wasn't sure where to start until watching this video. Thank you Lisa ❤️
Same here. I’m realizing I need a full year no contact with them now. They ruined me as a kid. It’s quite sad
You are not the body or the trauma.
You’re the observer of your life
You’re the decision maker, the boss of your experience and reality.
Like Lisa always says YOU ARE ENOUGH,
Enough to heal authentically,
Enough to stay aware
Enough to think
Enough to love and be loved openly.
@Pedro Ivan Sanchez Absolutely never limit yourselves
Thank you sooo much Lisa 🙏 finally everything started make sense after listening your priceless information. I always felt so much guilt being angry at my mother. I finally asked her if she slept with my first husband, she suddenly became sick and told my ant that im rocking the boat and im jealous ungrateful daughter
Hello friend how are you doing today and hope you are enjoying your day ?
I had such a similar experience where I got so sick in every way. I saw every doctor, every therapist, took every medication before I turned away from western medicine and sought healers. Now I know that my body was falling apart because I was not honoring my needs and I was trying to plow through this marriage with a full blown narcissist. You must honor mind, body and spirit!
I relate to your mum a lot . If it wasn’t fir your videos I’d probably wouldn’t know my patterns and get older in a similar relationship like your parents. Thank you for helping us all ❤️
Gavin de Backer’s book The Gift of Fear goes deep into trusting intuition
Sending Much love from Egypt!! Absolutely love the work you do. Bless you and your family.
Your timing is always perfect
I can’t wait to hear it in the morning setting my reminder! Amen
The food thing hit home for me....I totally understand. We were staving kids too.
As a little kid in my bed at night, I would fantasize about sneaking into my neighbors house and eating the food they had in their cupboards
My ex-wife and I honeymooned in Hawaii too on the big island 🤙 I splurged and booked an oceanfront room and we were treated well by the hotel staff. We had an amazing time. I had a hard time during my divorce fifteen years ago and that made me so bitter and resentful. I have since then learned that relationships are not forever. Best way to carry on with life is to hold on to all the good memories and experiences and discard the rest. I barely have a handful of memories with my father. He’s a troubled man who passed on his hurt to me.
Dr. Bessel van der Kolk researches and promotes what you’re saying, what you practiced with meditation. I like it when people I admire share information that dove tails.
Hello friend how are you doing today and hope you are enjoying your day ?
His book "The Body Keeps the Score" is brilliant
As a new mom ( at 39 ) all of my trust issues are arising fast, your videos have been a blessing and a guide. Thank you.
Sadly, so much of this video was like you were looking into my window, as a child and relating what you saw. I so appreciate you helping shed light in the why's as well as practical support for us to recalibrate to a much calmer, healthier homeostasis.❤
When my ex told me that “we should just bag it” I was elated! I don’t think I could have initiated it because of my guilt, but after he said that, I was like YES! I had permission to leave. Then when he received the divorce papers, he thought I was doing that to get to him. He thought I was joking. Ahhh NO! It took me 3 years to finally get rid of him. But once he signed the papers I felt like this giant weight was lifted from my shoulders. It felt so good to finally be free from him. By the time I took action, I had been so deeply weakened and damaged that I really couldn’t see clearly
Thank you, 💞 you are my sister from another mother.💞☺️🙏
I feel uncomfortable with fun and joy. This hits home.
This is hands down THE best video of yours I’ve ever watched. Omgoodness I’m so happy and so grateful that I found you years ago and now this last relationship wasn’t a waste. It’s exactly what I needed to come home to myself!
I wish I had been able to understand these things about myself years ago. I spent a lifetime in denial and fear. I've finally woke up and understand but I'm 63 now and it's too late. So sad.
58
Never too late
Me too at 58.
65 and it is never too late to wake up to yourself
You cannot have known then but you do know now. So... the only NEVER is NEVER AGAIN, LOL.
Have faith in your own resilience. My life has improved drastically now that I know and I am financially stuck with this fool I married. Thank goodness no small kids are the issue anymore.
Try to and work on the number of years you’ve been alive . You are still you . So it’s never too late . Society is very good at trying to present that age on this earth is an issue . It’s not over until it’s over ♥️Much love and light and you can do this .
You are one of the most influential, helpful, easy to understand life coaches that really helped me learn all the psychology behind the trauma. Thank you!
i will never forget when my own mother literally called me "nasty" to my face... all because i said a curse word by accident-just one of the many ways i experienced my mother's love, NOT... while growing up and still to this day.. why i will never understand
Lisa. I so love you. In my opinion, you are so balanced & so right on. I had been talking to God, (as a one-sided conversation, for weeks about all kinds of stuff, whether He would choose to talk to me I not. (And. This stuff is too deep & this stuff is too private anyway to share with the average bear. ( I have 3, really deep & spiritually mature mentors; and it's always a 2-way street, mutual mentoring,) but they are already too burdened with their own stuff & lots of other people dealing with "much smaller stuff" kind of messes. So, in reality peopleno longer have time to give each other the time of day! If you ever saw "Bruce Almighty with Jim Carey, ,(hysterical (God is the only One who has the ability to hear & track with all people all the time, day or night,. He tracks with me 24/7 most of the time I hear phrases or song lyrics sung by famous artist . Those lyrics are right on. Lisa, I remember a time, shortly after vacating high school, when I was so sick withthem. healthr problems. 3 of my doctors, really had respect for me & I them. They actually sat on their own examining room tables, along side of me took my left hand and were actually looking into my eyes. They all told me, I don't know why you are so sick. You're much too young to be having any of these problems. They all asked me if I would like to talk about whatever was bothering me. Amazing! They actually took time and sctually cared about me. How many doctors really have much time to speak with their patients. They're usually too swamped with too many patients. Lisa, one item you spoke about; becoming extremely sick because of really evil parenting, (which I had, in spades,) was once a real reality. So much so, that one of them asked me if I would like to go with him and a few of his friends, on a 40 foot catch sailing trip for one week. Hell yes. Had a blast. I became the one in charge of the anchor. (Which was lots of fun.) And doing all the cooking in the galley, because everyone else would get sea sick, actually puking, where I would not. Birds came on deck sat right next to me, Whales swam along side of us, We all went fishing & diving. My favorite place to sit on thIs vessel was on the bow sprit, wIth an ice cold beer, or a sissy drink like hot buttered rum, and being dunked in the ice cold water. (Now, that was fun.) None of us wanted to come back. When I came back, I removed myself from all the work situations, other people try to stick you with because you are a certain gender,, left the area. Then, after asking Him, God showed & told me whatt He created me for. He then led me & provided me for all the right "fits" for me and I never looked.I became a happy camper. They could all stick it. (Certainly, not this sweet & fun loving doctor. He could see, all I needed was some rip roaring fun & provided it.)
This is all so true! My mom has dementia and Alzheimer’s and I know her disease is the result of my father’s mental/psychological abuse, coercion and manipulation over the last 60 years. Her brain is mush. And I was clearly headed in that direction with my soon-to-be ex-husband!
With my ex, I didn't know WHAT was wrong, something was off, but I excused it because of his own child sexual abuse and thought I could help him heal. Lots of commitment phobic men before that...I didn't know people behaved like that. We need more education at an elementary school level and on, about good and bad communication, what verbal abuse is. I guess "safe touch" and bullying have started to fill those holes.
Thank you Lisa for all your wisdom you share. I finally got purchased "The Road Back to Me". In under a weeks time I am 3/4 of the way through the book. I definitely can relate to some of your experiences. I am becoming more at peace with myself than I ever have.
I’m glad you said this I have narcissistic and BPD traits yes I was married to a abusive serial cheater but I as well was a partner in the toxic dance . I’m learning new ways to think and work through my many triggers and abandonment issues. I was a narcissistic/ co dependent/ people pleaser with very little empathy but could be the abuser as well as the victim. In the end my ex broke me down to bits . I questioned my sanity for years but was in cognitive dissonance about him and myself.
I feel like those with narcissistic traits idealize others they believe they have found the perfect partner but resentment takes over and the switch flips any empathy or care is gone and the partner is replaced . It is almost child like entitlement and a temper tantrum. They are highly manipulative because they learned that is survival in childhood, I began to grow and wanted to work out issues and communicate like a adult , my ex so used to hiding his real self in childhood only wanted someone who saw him as not flawed and he wanted someone who he could have dependent on him , he gets much younger women I believe because they look up to him and they are wanting to be mothers one day so they baby him as well .
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Just wanna say, Thank You. I believe this message and information will also combat racism, which is rooted in hate & Projection as a result of narcissistic thinking. You're greatly appreciated. Continue Courageously
TRUTH!
What I struggle with is genuinely believing I'm actually safe. If I'm in my home and my doors are locked and curtains closed, I feel safe. But I take one step outside, and my anxiety goes through the roof. I don't know how to feel safe when outside knowing anything can happen. Anyone can do something. I feel like its not that I subconsciously feel unsafe, I genuinely believe I (or anybody, really) can't ever be safe when out in public
Father's that encourage their sons and participate with their sons, complimenting them MORE often than ridiculing or scolding them, WILL make their sons FAR MORE SUCCESSFUL, and eternally grateful for such a father
All of our parents were like that!!
This is my story. You have helped me so much for years . Thank you so much Lisa ! Namaste ✨💖✨
Lisa, thank you very much for this video. The timing could not be any better, and the message truly resonates with me. I appreciate all your work!
Omg I’m you in man form. So thankful that I finally woke up.
As a species,at one time we recognized "anxiety"as not panic ,but us turning into our badass mode because we were threatened or attacked,because our brain slows things down,our hearts pump more blood to 5he muscles, and brain,so we become super cognisant of our surroundings,even knowing what is approaching from around the corner,My there is everything is energy,even emotions,and how we chanel 5hat is on us,but I wish I dealt with anxiety like that a long time ago,
It is very good to know that there are psychiatrist or psychologist that believe in quantum science and Spirituality, I believe that we are light waves and electric. I am experiencing this quantum field now where I observe things, with or without guidance. To be a witness of God is an honorable position.
Lisa this is BRILLIANT!! It took a lot of work to reprogram my subconscious to tap into my gut feelings and go for what I know. Your release the guilt and shame meditations were a cornerstone of my healing journey. I released the Jedi Mind Tricksters and stopped my contortionist tendency. Now I bet on me and leave from the inside out. Namaste to you dear one!!
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You are such a blessing Lisa 💗
Lisa I'm sending you lots of love and hugs. Thank you for everything you do.
I'm so glad that I found your channel
Thank you to a 12 step program. I see more and more of who I started out to be. It’s safe to reach down and find those dreams that went underground.
Hello friend how are you doing today hope you are fine with peace and love over there
This is great. i have heard a few couches saying you cant trust your intuition.
This is the most bizzare statement I have ever heard.
Hello friend how are you doing today hope you are fine with peace and love over there
This is incredible information. Your describing my life too… everything from the liver and onions to marrying my first husband. ❤
Thanks for sharing Lisa. Being the 4th born of 6 children and denied the right of speaking up about anything led to me being sexually abused by the age of 6. I endured the punishment of having things put in my ears so I wouldn't repeat what I have heard in my family. Of course the lost of my hearing came to speak impairment and all the shame with it. I still fear the conflict and was robbed of having any goals as a child. I didn't even finish the 7th grade and was arrested for drugs at the age of 15. I thought it was a curse for me to have anything of my own growing up. So I started living a double life and seeing the life other people were having and a relative who was my mother sister and out to start gaining off me once I had quit school and started working. Made it be known that the 2 bedroom house was put in my name as a infant by the absent father before divorcing my mother. And became a blessing. I had just turned 17 and came home to a empty house with nothing but a few clothes. I decided that I was going to try to join the navy and since I was 17 I was given a GED and a civil service test before the physical, and was denied because of my hearing. But I went on to work and put myself through technical school before turning 18. That would take a turn to the worse when the absent father had heard about the things that Ive done accomplish he had to do something to destroy my outcome and make it his. He was promising more money and the world he wanted. I made the 500 mile trip to be the absent father and he was a great liar to have hooked me into making that move.
I resorted to repeating the words he said to get me to make that move to the people who were working with him. The partnership he suckered someone into was over with and he was down to one other person working for him besides myself, and Thankfully that person didn't like him and made it known within the first half hour of being around of me. We hit it off immediately after I said that I didn't like him too. Although he was a donor that lied to get me to move 500 miles. I will never forget what he said. I'm going to teach you something nobody can take away from you. You can make a good living by doing it and don't let anyone pay you less than your work is worth. Since he thinks he dumped you on me for some free training, he was going to make sure that I was paid the same as him. So for the next couple of months, I was taught by the best and my new best friend. He took the responsibility of paying me and I gave my father the lies back and didn't tell him how much my friend was paying me, just kept on with his lies, once you learn you can make some good money. I lost contact with my Good friend Jeff M. decades ago and left that deadbeat father the same way he did when I got there. Nothing before and nothing when I left him. So if intuition owning my own business and since I'm disabled and not throwing the towel in the game of life for a good while to come still. I hope to be able to teach others how to be the best in their lives and not to sell themselves short, and although I had to LIE to a demon of a father, I would maintain my self respect.
This is so true! I’m 53 and still trying to learn to trust my gut. Lisa, you explain it perfectly, thank you!
I have a hard time making decisions in general. I can be very decisive. Sometimes I deliberate a long time trying to make a decision and then when I finally do, I second-guess myself.
Because wisdom and knowledge are not the same thing, knowledge is just the ability to recall something we have read or been told,wisdom is the ability of recalling useful data from a personal experience.
It's scary how our experiences are almost the same. Narcissists/codependents are like copy/paste.. same behavior regardless of their country, culture etc. Wow
Lisa, you have totally helped me and woke me up to many things. I have seen in my family and friends in how they are narsitic. When I was growing up. I loved theater and acting. Some in my family. Would be you know people will think you gay. Only gay guys are in theater . You never going to make a good living. And a starving artist. I came from a verbally and physical abusive family. You help me stand up for myself and stop the circle . Thank you so much.
First of all, thank you! Secondly, as someone who was raised by a couple of narcissist, you have answered so many questions for me that I’ve had for a long time now. As a parent, I am always looking for ways to break the horrible family cycle that just keeps getting passed down through generations.
Thanks again, sorry for the ramble.
Your videos are so real for me that they make me anxious, but I still listen to you!!! Thank you!!💕
You have hit the nail on the head with all of this.
Omg my grandpa said all of those negative emotions. No wonder why I'm fked up as an adult.
There is still time to get professional counselling and support. There is still time to find ways to recover and heal xxoo
Very good and useful teachings, thanks 🙏
I remember being hit in the face with a swing, I was terrified to go home because I knew I’d get into trouble
Yes. From my earliest memories, getting hurt was my fault. Always my fault. Massive consequences to accepting blame!
gillian260, Omgosh! Isn’t that crazy? Same here! Was sexually assaulted at 12 on my way walking down my street, I ran for blocks with him chasing me, I got home terrified and my dad yells at me, “what the hell is wrong with you?”, well needless to say, I stuffed that event way down to my toes. So sad! Saw him again at age 20 and told my boyfriend at the confront him, he was a Narcissist also, nobody helped stand up for me!
Thank you, God for this channel and my support group here! Love to you all! 💕 peace and safety💝
Thanks for addressing this issue, it totally relates and I like the color of your dress. It’s refreshing to know that we don’t have to turn into our parents and with awareness can become who we were destined to become.
Let me start my meditation off this especially the part about how your mother was so into your father TOO MUCH.
100% my story. Thank you Lisa!!! ❤️
Bless you Lisa!!!❤
So much valuable information, really resonated, thank you!🙏❤️
Lisa you have honestly saved my life. Thank you so much 🙏🏼 I appreciate you ❤️
Thank you for putting everything into perspective. Keep doing you!
Yep I get it about the programming and THAT is all I am working on since it is the only thing I can change.
You’re so pretty, Lisa.💕😘 your hair is healthy and your words are pure. Love,
Jayla 💍
Dear Lisa Tks for such a valuable video. Rewiring our brain to bring safety and congruence is so fundamental to healing.🙏
yes, I am working through trust issues now, rewiring my brain to know I am worthy and lovable. Thank you Lisa, I need this wise counsel, you pop up and counsel the hell out of me! haha! thank you so much xxxx
This was an excellent video teaching once again Lisa! So helpful. I appreciate you sharing your personal trauma that resulted in your codependency.
I have been on this healing journey for a longtime and so I could receive what you are sharing. It makes perfect sense to me. My mother had absolutely no self-awareness how her behavior affected us, her children. She always justified and rationalized her behavior and attitude and it was always someone else's fault, usually us kids or our Dad.
I will rewatch this video because it was so helpful. There have been many times and I still do it. Place my hand on my heart to comfort myself. I like your idea of telling yourself, "I am SAFE!" throughout your day. I will incorporate that.
Thank you Lisa for all your words of wisdom to help us move forward. I am going to honor my God-given intuition.
I like how you said, " hit the pause button and ask myself what do I want...what do I think, what do I really want to do?
So helpful. ❤️
So so helpful and eye opening thank you so much 💗
I just broke up with my bf and im trying to change my life for the better. Im learning what my intuition is and what it feels like and looks like and how to trust my intuition. Its that feeling you get that you cant explain. That feeling of somethings wrong even if your not seeing a problem. Your brain picks up on things you dont realize yet and makes you feel the way you do. Trust your first feelings but also think objectively and with your head. Sometimes feelings only cloud your judgement. Im not saying be cold just dont let your emotions and feelings be the tool that is used against you... with your intuition, If there is a feeling, no matter how small, theres a reason why. thats your first basic instincts, the rest that follow are just mere doubts that have been placed in your head by society or the abuser. It turns into excuses for the abuser and your actions become for them and not for yourself. Anything you do is with Them in mind. And it becomes draining. Dont be too caring, its ok to have a little bit of healthy narcissism within yourself... You cant help but feel at blame for putting yourself in that situation but you didnt know. Its not like they teach this in school or our parents teach us. Its not your fault. But once you find out about yourself and the narcisisst then you can choose to either rise or fall... Im choosing to rise and have constant self improvement through knowledge and self care... I appreciate videos like these, you never know how much they truly do help...
Thank you for this excellent video, Lisa. Listening to it this morning has opened new gateways and my world is not as dark and sinister as I was experiencing it as. I am going to listen again right now. This is a powerful message.
you are a legend thank you so much , im no longer sinking , im still im being educated there is some thing in the air i feel lighter discarded 4 weeks ago im no longer blind im going to be ok , yes got some work to do and i relish that . thank you
Thank you, thank you, thank you Lisa. Your videos are helping me so much. 🦋
Hey Lisa, God bless you 🙏 sister.
OMG! That’s exactly how I moved and my intuition I never listened. Thanks so much for the info
My mom invited her youngest brother to live with us in 1968. She had 7 sisters and 7 brothers.
The family consisted of my parents and my 6 siblings.
When it was discovered that my uncle was molesting me, I was blamed.
The movie The Sound of Music had inspired me to want to be a Nun like Maria.
My dad told me I was too filthy to be a Nun. I was 6 years old. My uncle moved in with another aunt and proceeded to molest my female cousins.
The good news is....my dad and I have had breakthroughs and we are good friends now.
Hello friend how are you doing today and hope you are enjoying your day ?
You’re good friends now????
This was amazing. Thank you for sharing
You're so beautiful Lisa. Thank you for your content, it's a blessing to have these videos available.
Thank you for covering this topic. You answered my question that I have been pondering. Sadly I have never trusted anyone much less myself.
thanks a lot! your channel has been a discovery for me!