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My daughter is a happy minimalist. At aged 22, she was asked to help clean for an elderly lady. Each room was full of tacky nick-knacks - gifts from her travelling children. My daughter earned extra just cleaning them. She suggested the lady decluttered gradually. She did. The lady was transformed. She'd been afraid to upset her kids who didn't even visit. That progressed to my daughter updating and repainting the entire house. Then, they did the garden. They became the closest of friends for 15 years. The lady died in her 90's. Then, she started on me...😂😂😂 Love it.
It is a new thing. They didn’t have to have a massive downsize to get there. They weren’t having to recognise the gross and rampant over consumption that is a characteristic of our lives. There was no Shein, Temu or online shopping. It is absolutely a ‘new’ thing.
Good points. My wife and I have used the lessons of minimalism to help us declutter our house, but we are definitely not minimalists. Our closets are no longer stuffed and our books fit on our bookshelves with room to spare. The odd items we stored in the attic and basement because we didn't really want them but couldn't part with them have been given new homes. The house looks much better. It's more restful and is easier to clean. All good things. But, we still have our hobbies and our sentimental items. For us, it's not a new religion and it should not become a new religion. Everything in moderation and that includes minimalism or essentialism. Just my two cents.
I was on a minimalism group years ago but had to leave. There was this weird competition going on between a few of the people. "We are down to one fork, spoon, plate, bowl, and cup per person." They were sleeping on the floor because they got rid of their furniture, and had two pairs of socks, underwear, pants, and shirts. I'm sorry, that's not me. I like order, I like beauty, I like looking around my house and seeing things that bring me joy (yes, Marie Kondo did resonate with me). Everything has to go through our own personalized filter. Emptiness *to me* is not beautiful. But neither is hoarding. Don't let others define your balance. Find your joy.
I did only have two bowls, two large bowls, and two plates for a long time, which worked well for me but I've added to my collection and I think that's a good thing. Only one set of silverware per person is not a life I ever want to live. I truly don’t understand the obsession to downsize so much.
Carrying only one fork, spoon, bowl, and sleeping on the floor is okay for camping, but people have not historically chosen this when they have a home. When an idea like this is so new, it doesn't seem like it's just a natural desire. In other words, at this extreme it could be a fad or a cult or a mental illness. Or maybe people want to be monks. There *have* been monks.
My relative lives in a minimalist apartment and is so bored at 70 that he has to keep working because he has nothing to do at home. My own house is a cluttered cosy mess filled with books and hobbies and photos and stationery. I'm never bored. However, there is probably a happy medium that neither of us has achieved.
That is going way too far for me. For an elderly person to not have anything of interest in their life besides working is extremely sad. I'm not a hobby type person but I enjoy reading and music so those kind of things I would still want to have in my life and my home.
The only thing he can do outside his home is work?Conjuring up images of your home and his home, thinking of yours provides a stress response. I'd take his home, and volunteer, travel, hike, swim, fish, go to the gym; essentially anything I want!
TT Maybe you could get your relative interested in birding and/or bird photography? I think there are more men 'birders' than women...but anyway you could do it together!
I’m 62 and find myself minimizing my life! I’m so much more comfortable with less stuff around me. I think cleaning out my parents home of 60 years after their passing pushed me further into minimalism! My children really don’t want a lot of what I’ve saved for them. Less is more for me!
Yep even though my craft room is cluttered it is totally functional, the rest of our house is relatively minimalist to keep us stress-free and we learned this by having to clean out many older relatives domiciles as they passed into care facilities or the next life. I've warned my mother that when she passes, I will move a dumpster into her driveway and just start dumping things into it because her house is so cluttered and her closets are stuffed full w things she's forgotten she's bought still w tags on it! I've told her, she'll go broke saving that much money on things she doesn't need LOL!
You are so right. I embraced minimilism at a bad time in my life. When I began to recover, minimalism was doing more harm than good to my mental health. It was as if my identity was disappearing. I'm no longer a minimalism. I'm me with stuff around me. No mess, no clutter. Just me and the things I love, need and are of sentimental value.
My goal for decluttering was minimal-ish. BUT as I reduced what I realized is only having what I truly needed meant not having enough dishes to host people if I wanted to. It meant reducing my belongings to the point where I had enough for me, but it pushed others out. Not enough seating, not enough beds to sleep on if someone were to stay. I kind of met it in the middle and have enough dishes to host 6 people, and a guest bed to let someone come stay. I still have very reduced belongings, but I've brought back what I felt was needed to let others in and be comfortable.
💯 This is how I want to live. I went through a phase when moving cities and countries where I had little more than my clothes, as what possessions I had were in storage for about a year. It felt good in some ways to travel light but as you relate, it can make it hard to invite others in, at least in a meaningful way. So I am grateful for my spare room, spare bed, crockery and cutlery as I have been able to host family members and friends from afar recently. Being able to offer hospitality occasionally brings me satisfaction, dare I say joy, that living minimally for a year somehow didn’t.
My biggest objection to the minimalist lifestyle, comes from experience. I purchased a small electric saw to trim the trees on my property, before putting it up for sale. A minimalist neighbour could not resist making fun of my purchase. But, as soon as several trees fell on her roof during a storm a week later, her room-mate was knocking on my door wanting to borrow said saw. My motto is: Never a borrower or lender be. The same neighbour refuses to carry a pen and notepad in her handbag, but is quick to ask to borrow mine. I find such behaviour annoying to put it mildly. As a mindful and frugal Prepper, I stash food to mitigate inflation and shortages. When it comes to dry goods, I buy high quality items in next to new condition. I prepare for man-made and natural disasters as well as the future illness or injury. All the more important when one lives alone. To discover that many do not even have enough food on hand to last three days is shocking. It is important to me be independent and resilient. It is clear, that many minimalists are about depending upon others, a behaviour I will never agree with. I also find it cold, when some refuse to hold onto photos, or possessions of departed family members. I will always feel sentimental towards family members. friends and pets who have died, I wish to remember them fondly. I treasure my mother's gardening trowel as well as her oak sewing drawers, and my father's books about ocean voyages, my relatives were well-known explorers. I also have a few of his hand tools, he was joiner. My mother used to say, " All things in moderation." I believe that also applies to minimalism. Being a fanatic about anything is often never a good idea. Rant over!
To me, minimalism is about keeping what matters and letting go of the rest. It allows me to enjoy the things I love to the maximum without being distracted by things that don’t enhance my life. I’ve seen maximalist homes that serve the same purpose and joy for their owners. We shouldn’t be deciding for others what is clutter, that is why you should never declutter for friends or family members unless it’s done working with them on what’s kept and let go without judgement. It’s everyone’s own, unique personal journey.
Well said. I never sort my husband's stuff or even suggest he parts with all the old 1970s Pioneer stereo and vinyls, the old cameras and tape decks, amplifiers and Ditton 44 speakers, which he enjoys dusting. His workshop is immaculate, everything filed to perfection.
When my friend, who has reduced her material items to a minimum, comes to visit me, I feel judged. She literally does a scan in my home and makes unappreciated comment on my stuff. I’ve learned to just accept that we’re different. The items in my home give me joy…the pictures, books, and mementos that are fond memories for me.
There are interesting stories behind items in my home, a history, a reflection, a memory of those I loved, appreciation of crafted items, pictures, tapestries and clothes made for me by my mother, the most treasured sometimes of small or no monetary value, like a wood carving made by my FIL when he was a young lad raised in Thetford Forest, or a torn fragment in the desk drawer bearing a poem by Tagore. Like you, I love my home and all that I have. Enjoy.
@@jennywren8937 That’s absolutely beautiful. Thank you for sharing. I, too, have a gold brocade dress my grandmother, who lived with us, made. She hand beaded the bodice and trim of the dress. I’m so grateful for this small but meaningful memento, and it’s a reminder to me of her love and dedication to her craft and our family.
@@divinecomedy0How lovely. I've no family interested in my things, so they will eventually have to go to auction. With this in mind I have sewn a picture of my grandmother b1880, into the family christening dress, along with her home which is on Ancestry. I plan labelling the tapestries and pictures with details which may interest future owners, having inherited items already marked this way.
@@divinecomedy0maybe meet your friend out for lunch or coffee. Somewhere you both like, you don’t need to feel judged in your surroundings. Easier on you 😊
I can't be a minimalist. I get bored easily, I love having lots of projects to do and things to create with, lots of nostalgic, interesting and beautifuli things around me!!😊
I am 79 yrs old. I have younger friends and a daughter and son-in-law who live minimalist lifestyle. I am working on de-cluttering now. When I am in the minimalist homes, i begin to get restless. It is like a hotel lounge or business with only necessary furniture. I don't like the feeling of wanting to get out of there, because these are friends and family, but those places don't feel like a "home" to me.
@@cathypaulino2153 Yes but stuff are a reflection of the individual; a life lived. It's like looking through a record collection or a person's book shelf. The objects we invest in whether monetarily or emotionally are important to us. The memories I have of my late mother's home are comforting. Her house was cluttered with decades of stuff that gave her joy. It was a pain to clear but I'm grateful for the experience of going down memory lane. So both is the answer.
Ive been in some, especially those.painted in the.current prison grey, morgue white,.etc., that reminded.me.of the prisons, hospitals, laboratories, and institutions in which ive.worked. I would not be happy living in a space that looks.like a cell in a Supermax prison. My house looks a bit like the Burrow, the Weasley's house in Harry Potter. We have plants, seeds sprouting in baby food jars, kids art projects, the sewing room and my knitting bag and the shelf of animal medications for the pets and the horses and the goats, the piano.and three guitars.and seven recorders and tinwhistles,.and tons of books, which we actually.do read. It's a family home, not a monastic cloister or a jail.
@@cathypaulino2153There's a lot of the people in the things they have snd keep that are beyond the necessities. What's wrong with experiencing the whole person & their chosen things?
Always ask. Thank you for saying this out loud. My mother-in-law threw out anything and everything from my sentimental husband’s childhood, which broke his heart when he found out, and still breaks mine whenever I think about it. Always ask first before getting rid of something in your home that your kids might want, especially if it’s theirs to begin with.
Thank you for your balanced approach to lifestyle choices. I am 70 years old. I am living on a small income, as I was disabled in my forth decade.. i can not afford to buy new. I take care of my clothing by mostly hand washing. I like to look nice when I do go out because I feel better about myself, and others treat me with more respect. Consequently, I have a plethora of clothing. I need for them to last. I don't know how long I will live, but I must maintain my dignity. Books are the other issue. I read only good literature and, as a result, want to read them more than once. Other than that, I don't care about stuff, with the exception of family photos and albums. Too bleak without my book friends around.
Thought provoking as always Tim. I grew up as a "minimalist by necessity" as a child in a large and poor family. I was happy with what I had at the time. In my 20s, I bought all the things I thought I wanted. The clutter and debt was overwhelming. Now I'm a "minimalist by choice" and finding my way back to a sense of peace. I do believe that simplicity has been great for my mental health. I don't subscribe to "extreme minimalism". Many people think this is the only way to live as a minimalist. It's not. I'm a "cozy minimalist" where my focus isn't owning the least amount possible - it's just eliminating the excess. Uncovering what I actually love. My priority is to step away from the mindless consumption that marketing has made us believe should be part of our regular lives and live and spend intentionally. The "trendy" aspect of minimalism bothers me because I see many people capitalizing on the "trend" rather than actually understanding minimalism as a lifestyle. For example - "extreme declutters" followed the next week by "hauls" and strict beliefs about what minimalist homes "should" look like. I think "Journey" is the right word Tim. For me, minimalism has enhanced so many aspects of my life and it's been a process that's allowed me to work through so much trauma as I slowly work through the clutter and find my way back to a simpler life. I hope everyone has a great Tuesday ❤
Good point of view, simply.clutterfree. I love watching minimalist channels and especially those mostly concerned with “clean with me” themes, as any of those are inspiring! (But also unachievable for some of us die-hards 🥸😂)
I don’t know why everything always has to be taken to an extreme. It is about less consuming. It used to be about living a simple life. Reprioritizing what is important. Having a smaller imprint. The videos I saw about minimalism where they give everything away to buy minimalist furniture is not about living a simple life at all. It’s about image and identity. Minimalism today sounds similar to anorexia. You totally explained what most people do with the concept of living more minimalistic.
There’s another dark side to minimalism too. The opposite of over-consumption is purging. So instead of buying more and more and hoarding, people like me go the other way and look for possessions and stuff they can get rid of every time they get upset or anxious. I used to suffer from bulimia but I can’t do that anymore basically because I wrecked my insides and not because the need went away. So now I have to be constantly vigilant and stop myself from getting rid of stuff.
I love getting rid of stuff, I akin it to the high that people who like to shop get from purchasing things they never use and often never leave the bag, I get a high out of getting rid of stuff. It makes me feel good especially for something large like a piece of furniture. It feels freeing like I can breathe.
I've found minimalist living has been most beneficial not because of the need to eliminate things but rather people in some cases. I now go to lunch sometimes in a grocery store, much cheaper and no tip required but frankly the staff there are more friendly. Also as part of my journey to a better me I quit drinking, the plan was temporary but I stayed in the same places and drank non alcoholic drinks, people treated me differently and I realized I didn't have that many friends. Im good with it though. Because now I know.
I'm a maximalist! I've got some lovely things, and also have hobbies of knitting, crochet and sewing. We live in much smaller spaces in the UK, so it doesn't take much. If it's no longer useful though, i freecycle or give it to charity. People always say how they like my stuff, so i guess it's attractive. Thanks for this take on it, balance is my goal!
Absolutely, I have a giveaway corner of things that I will recycle or donate to charity, if they're no longer necessary to me in my life - I send them along their way into the great material continuum to be enjoyed by others : )
I love moreism. The more funny things I have the happier I am. Minimalism scares me. It's like an empty mind. There's nothing there. Nothing to talk about, laugh about, look at, enjoy. Just a blank. Each to their own. Some need nothingness.
Some good points here. I have found myself unsubscribing from a bunch of channels that were all about decluttering, but I found they were constantly buying new things, decluttering, buying, decluttering. It was exhausting. I’m trying to live more intentionally with my journey to minimalism. Refinishing old furniture, recycling old textiles, mending clothing where I can, etc. it’s taken some years to get to this point but I think I’m finally seeing the light.
Having listened to this, I´m more convinced you must have been a fabuous teacher/preacher because you look at and listen to people more closely and you do understand so may different points of view and needs. So impressive!
“ use it up, wear it out , make do, do without “ Frugality Very practical. Balance and purpose are good indicators of a peaceful and comfortable environment.
Oh, I remember that old-school saying from the Depression Years!!! "Use it up, Wear it out, Make it do, Or do without." Thank you so much for reminding me of that!!! 😅
I’ve found giving gifts to my daughter usually left me feeling empty, when those gifts seemed unappreciated, and ultimately returned. I now ask what she would like or could use. It’s brought more joy in me, the giver, and my daughter, the receiver. I’ve found she mostly requests things that are needed for her health.
I don’t have attachments to stuff…I’m not a minimalist , but no where. Near a hoarder. hoarders can’t part with not only family heirlooms ( to the ones I know, they can’t part with relatives furniture, china, even holiday decor ….But IMO it’s stuff ! I do ask my girls if they want things before tossing, but I don’t feel bad they didn’t want my moms china, neither did I as it was what she liked, not me My thinking is we came into this world with nothing, we will take nothing with us. As for my Hoarding friends, I feel so bad for their kids, they will have to rent roll offs to get rid of all that stuff…that’s one thing I will not burden my kids with. Did I mention I know of people that can not allow anyone, even family members into their home because of their hoarding. I’m sorry, but to turn away your loved ones that are present, because your house is full of deceased family furniture and not only your stuff but theirs is just wrong.
I don’t have attachments to stuff…I’m not a minimalist , but no where. Near a hoarder. hoarders can’t part with not only family heirlooms ( to the ones I know, they can’t part with relatives furniture, china, even holiday decor ….But IMO it’s stuff ! I do ask my girls if they want things before tossing, but I don’t feel bad they didn’t want my moms china, neither did I as it was what she liked, not me My thinking is we came into this world with nothing, we will take nothing with us. As for my Hoarding friends, I feel so bad for their kids, they will have to rent roll offs to get rid of all that stuff…that’s one thing I will not burden my kids with.
Tim, I don't really consider myself a minimalist, but I don't like clutter. I am uncomfortable when visiting someone's home that has more "clutter" than my own. I don't say anything or do anything it's just a feeling. Sometimes I feel that something doesn't fit in my own home but because of memories or sentimental attachment I cannot send the item away. However, I have told family members that when I am gone they can feel free to give away everything I own without any regrets. 😊
We as a family do not give Christmas gifts anymore. I think that economic privilege and all the negativity used to describe minimalism is much ado about nothing. If you are older, do your kids a favor and clear out the clutter so that your kids do not have to do it. I do have judgments about people that are hoarders, I live next door to one and have to look at their piles every time I go outside of my house. Take responsibility for your clutter.
You have no idea the absolute gift you are giving your children by relieving them of the burden of having to get rid of your stuff when they will be grieving. Thanks on their behalf! 😄 Try not to be too hard on your neighbors, though. Hoarding can be a mental illness. And if it's really bad, the authorities might need to step in.
I had a neighbor like that and asked the town about junk yard rules and they followed up with warnings to them so they cleaned up for a bit so I sold my house while his was looking better. I drove by a few weeks ago and it’s worse than ever!
Excellent advice as always and always thought provoking. As I clean out I do ask my kids if they want things that I no longer use, or things that belonged to their father or grand parents. I remember a sword that my grandmother had that belonged to my 2nd great grandfather who fought in the Civil War. That was passed on to a 3rd cousin. I recently asked that cousin if he still had the sword and he told me that he treasures it along with the ring that he was given by my grandmother. My mother had a painting that was painted by this cousins grandmother. He was thrilled to get it. I was given a shell purse that was purchased in Atlantic City in 1879. It was bought by my 2nd great grandmother for her daughter when she was 8. It was passed to me by my grandmother and I passed it to my daughter to give to her daughter. Another item I treasure is a Jackfield cow creamer that was brought over from Wales in 1869 by another 2nd great grandmother. These things were not used. They were kept in closets and drawers and in a cabinet to be treasured by future generations. In my process of decluttering there was an aluminum ash tray that was an item given to the employees of Ford Motor where my husband worked. It has the Ford logo stamped on it. Since no one in the family smokes I thought that I would just discard it. On second thought I asked my son if he wanted it and he was thrilled to get it which very much surprised me. I gave another son a set of drills in a wooden box that belonged to my grandfather who loved wood working. I have furnished my home for 54 years with all of my grandparents furniture which brings back many good memories. The rocking chair I have is one I remember my grandmother rocking me in when I was about 4. I rocked my 3 children in it as well as my grandchildren. The crib I used for my children was one that my mother used for me, my brother, and my sister, as well as 3 cousins. I used it for my 3 children and I passed it to my sister who used it for her 2 children. It was passed back and 3 of my grandchildren used it. My son has it now and will repair it to pass on to his children.
Those are all excellent points that you brought to light. I am pursuing minimalism in the sense that I’m keeping only the things that bring me joy or that I need, nothing that is just taking up space just for the sake of taking up space. I’m still fighting with the “just in case items” because I’m also frugal. I actually started this journey of decluttering house-wide (Swedish death cleaning) because I don’t want my daughters to have to go through clearing out all my stuff that they won’t want when I’m gone, like my huge assortment of sea shells that I collected when my house was beach themed. I live in Indiana 🙄. I am also on the trying to reduce plastics and to live more eco-friendly train and many, if not all, the points you mentioned go along with that as well. Socially isolating, buying gifts (I ask what the recipient wants now), can be expensive, perfectionism and stress, mentally exhausting, etc. And, yes, judgmental as well. I am getting better at tending my own garden, though. You’re right, a balanced approach is the key to finding the peace within our lives and home. ☮️ Great video 👍🏼I’m off to buy some plants for my pot on my front porch. Maybe I’ll add a few seashells as decoration…😂🐚🪴🌷Have a good day.
I gave all my seashells collected for over 50 years from 3 different oceans to my son and only granddaughter. They have used them to decorate all around their house...both inside and outside. It brings them joy! And I enjoy their joy and that I can still see the seashells when I'm at their house! ❤
@@lisap963 oh, that’s so great that you still get to enjoy them! Neither of my daughters are interested in mine so I’m going to take them to a consignment store to pass the joy on to someone else! 😊 I may keep one or two, though! 😉
Whats bugs me when watching the minimalism missionaries on youtube is that most (I get the impression) are ex-hoarders on the rebound. So after having lived in a god-aweful mess, they now opt for a psychiatric-ward bare white walls creepy bland empty abode - which especially breaks my heart when I see that there are children in the house. I have never been a hoarder and I do not like a mess. I do however like asthetically pleasing objects such as quality art and my all time favorite antiques, which always have exquisite workmanship which I really appreciate. No empty white walls for me. On the other hand, I do not even have a garage or a storage room so I do not store things that I do not use.
I have also wondered how extreme minimalism affects kids, it doesn't seem healthy. Also is it a parent's right to get rid of things their kid likes just because they thinks it's clutter? Interesting topic for sure.
The blessing of living alone is that I decide what goes or stays. I do not keep things for others to inherit...they have shopped and taken what they want. I am very content with my leather journals and Deneen mugs.
I absolutely love these commentary style videos of yours. So well-thought out and well written. I enjoy being in a community lead by a wise man. Thank you. ❤
I had to smile...I tried a bit of sorting as prescribed by some minimalists. Now, I have been doing needed sorting, but I cook...a lot. And I soon realized I need multiple cooking implements in my kitchen, the tools of my life, for speed, convenience. I ended up replacing some things I thought I might not miss. Wrong! My lifestyle isn't the same as many others...I'm uniquely me. And, I think everyone really needs to weigh out his own uniqueness. With age, things will change, and I'll re-evaluate as life progresses.
I felt bad for minimalists during the covid shutdown: if you only have basic functional items in your home, what happens when you can't leave home? Sitting around glued to a screen? It just seems like it would be really boring.
I've been going to a food bank for a year and a half and I've never been a hoarder, but I've started to pile up cans of beans, chickpeas (garbanzo beans), peas, as well as rice, pasta, dried legumes, all around the house. It looks so cluttered so I'll have to tidy them up by date, etc. I keep thinking that I might need them in future as some food banks now only help you for 4 weeks. It's a constant panic and fear about the future when you are poor. I wish I could afford to leave these cans of beans behind, but they don't expire for at least 2 years and it's free food, so I try to find a place for it, even if it makes me look like a hoarder
Organize it a bit. Sounds like legitimate preparation. Just try to use the presence of the food you have as a blessing to reduce fear. Bean salad is delicious.
Sir! I am 72 and having to downsize now after becoming a widow. This is the absolute best talk I have ever heard on this subject! I saw my mother go thru the trauma of losing so many things through moving 2 or 3 times after my dad died. She lost many things that she wished she had later through negligent and hasty discarding by family members as they tried to help because they thought she didn't "need" them. I hurt for her as she is still alive and interested at 92 . She still laments about it. I am learning a lot about how to downsize without totally killing off your own personal and unique life. Other people don't really understand the things you have said here. "Do to others as you would have done to you." Think about that, folks.😉 THANK YOU, SIR!
Um, a lot to unpack here. I think one needs to evaluate their own relationship to 'things'. If excessive it can lead to hoarding. My aunt was an extreme hoarder because she kept a ton of what she perceived as family heirlooms and she did not trust anyone else to take care of them. Well, in time, they were all covered in musty mold because she kept on collecting. She left it all for us to clean up after she died, having so hoarded that she only had an edge of a couch of space left to live on (and die), cat hair and dust an inch thick on the walls, and many other horrors. This is not what one would wish on their heirs to deal with. So, to me, there is a balance to 'things' and if your emotions and identity are over connected to them, time to re-evaluate.
My cousin was an unhealthy hoarder but he gave instructions in his Will for clearance to be carried out by a local couple who made a good living from it, including preparing the property for sale.
My cousin likewise was a hoarder and I spent a few months helping her out at the end of her life. While cleaning out some paths in her house, I could not find the HVAC cold air return. I searched everywhere but of course every surface, floor, table, and chair was covered with stuff. Finally I found the cold air return in the dining room wall near the floor, with 4 feet of boxes in front of it and about 1 1/2 whole cats worth of cat hair on the grate. I cleaned it, changed the filter, and opened the space. It felt like a major accomplishment!
I began simplifying and downsizing my life 8 years before I retired in 2020. While not a minimalist, this actually had a financial benefit, bc I was able to relocate easily for work and better pay during my last working years. What remains are the how-to and craft/diy books that I cherish, and family momentos. I gave the valuable antique furniture to my daughter and son-in-law which made them quite happy.
I’m 74 and doing a lot of decluttering. Gonna have a huge tag sale. I’m doing what I call culling. I no longer need nine pocketbooks, so I make myself “cull” out half or more and maybe leave three! I no longer use evening bags, so I cull those and keep maybe one. Trying to do this all over house. It’s def freeing. We spent weeks cleaning out my 97 year old mother in law’s apartment and she had stuff she’d hadn’t used in 40 years! But I have a nice section of a guest room to do my jigsaw puzzles! Be neat, have less, no storing stuff for “whenever,” keep only what you use often, keep only treasured mementos (just a few!). I never understood storage units for c**p you’ll NEVER probably think about or need again!!!
I'm 76 and currently donating most of my Kitchen Stuff. My life has been episodic. Sometimes I've cooked a lot - for husband and friends. Sometimes, I've been alone and nomadic. A few years ago I was given the chance to 'settle down' in a small old house - and planted a wonderful garden and bought everything I'd ever had or wanted for my kitchen. Alas! The house needed way too much renovation and I left it. Currently in a 1-BR apartment surrounded by storage tubs of never-used Kitchen Stuff. Giving it away. Preparing to downsize to a Studio. What's left is Bankers Boxes of Books, Opera Scores/Sheet Music, CDs and DVDs. Not sure whether I'll keep them. Don't have many Clothes - never did - and really don't have anything else. Lived most of my adult life in a small Manhattan apartment, so never accumulated a lot.
I remember a conversation with an Inlaw about the house that his son and daughter-in-law were living in. It had some interesting features and spaces and wasn’t furnished yet, except for a couch in the middle of it, that was pretty torn up because they let the dogs use it a lot. No judgment, it’s their house and their dogs. But since they love to watch sports, and they already had and eat in kitchen with room for a lot of people, I wondered out loud about how the dining room, which was a step up from the huge living room, could make an awesome and cozy spot for seating for watching sports, based on where their television was. And the middle of the living room could be the dog/kid playing area. Lots of room to run around and play, No obstructions. The Inlaw tried to read me the riot act about how I didn’t know what a home was. I remember telling him that the house is just a tool that we live in, and that a home was wherever Family is, pointing to my husband, who was the only family member of our nuclear family present at the time. All of these years later I still feel the same. Home is where love is, ideally with family or friends that you have a lifelong affinity with, or even alone, for those of us who recharge with a lot of quiet, private time. The house is the tool that should serve the people who dwell in it, to meet their unique needs in ways that suit them. Clearly, as we age, those of us who have various reasons for wanting a clean home will logically want less to clean. Perhaps fewer tripping hazards. For some it means a guest room or two for visitors that doesn’t require a bail out before people come over. It might mean a comfortable practical place for doing crafts. Other hobbies. It might mean creating a space that is ready to show and sell, while enjoying living in a space that looks like a model home. And all of these goals require either more or less stuff than the next person might need. And that’s OK!
This is why I don’t like having people over to my home. I got stuff. I don’t want to be judged. Life is too short to be worried about what others think of us.
This is a super video!!! I could never EVER become a minimalist; however, I do admire and respect anyone who wants to live a minimalist life style. Our possessions are a definite reflection of our personality and our heritage. Almost every item in my home has meaning-if only to myself. In my opinion, it is very easy for a person with a minimalist personality to become harshly judgmental of those of us who save everything-I have been known to make a candy bar wrapper a sentimental object-LOL. Those with the maximalist personality most always live in a very warm and inviting home-at least I’ve been told on numerous occasions that my home is very warm and inviting!!! While my daughter was growing up here, her friends always loved to congregate here and they loved to hear about my collections and appreciated the fact that my home has so much family history and special meaning. I pray every day that I will be blessed to live out my remaining days in this house and take my final breath in this place that is filled with everything that I love so much !!!!! 💝💝💝
That’s really sweet. It doesn’t really sound like you’re a hoarder, but a collector of memories and family memorabilia and people are comfortable in your home, that’s the difference, most people would not be comfortable in a hoarder house. I on the other hand do not have a sentimental bone in my body. I have heard people say that they had sentimental clothes or shoes or some of the oddest things that I don’t see how they could be sentimental. I’ve also heard people say they thought objects had feelings so they couldn’t get rid of them because it would hurt their feelings . There’s gotta be a middle ground to all of this. I’ve been told my house looks like a model home or that it looks like no one lives here, that’s fine by me, I like it that way. My motto is “nothing on the floor except furniture legs”. Also, I have since added area rugs and trash cans to my motto. 😊 It’s very fast and easy to clean.
Interesting how a cash gift is appreciated by some, but an insult to others. A used croquet set is a treasure to some and a burden to another. We can't control how others might interpret our desire to keep our lives simple, free from visual clutter and releasing us from the time burden of caring for our things when we'd rather be creating photographs, caring for a loved one. I think the key is to know yourself and to not judge others for being different. Now that I have less clutter and more time to pray, I can ask for some assistance in this. Also, knowing what other's "Love Language" is, can really help in knowing if you are actualy gifting or burdening with your thoughtfulness. Another fabulously insightful chat, Tim. Thank you for taking the time from caring for your stuff to caring for us. Time is a beautiful "Love Language"...for some😊
I've not seen a video ever addressing this! I am in a 30+ yo home, full of stuff. When the ex left, he took what he wanted & started new, leaving me with the ugly furniture that is too expensive to remove & buy new. Raised 2 little kids that grew up, good jobs, moved 1500 miles away & renting & I have all their photos & memories they may want? They have great paying jobs & can be minimalists. They stay at dad's house when in town & are too busy to come "home" & help me make decisions. Now that I have time for my own hobbies, I don't want to declutter the hidden areas & even though, I'm in therapy, there are so many triggers. The thought of heading down to the "organized stash" & knowing I'll probably feel sad, angry, bitter, etc, means that if I let someone in, I'll get judged as "lazy", etc. Vicious cycle... I'd rather be outside biking & playing pickleball with friends than in my dungeon, with reminders....
I can relate. I did this, having 5 grown kids. I made 5 boxes bought at the dollar store. I went through the mementos, separated them by each of them and gave them their boxes. They can do as they please. Keep, or not. This act helped me immensely!
@@katethielmann4244 thanks for the idea. Since pandemic started, they are only in town for holidays. One year, I did pack a suitcase & a couple Rubbermaid totes with prom dresses, fancy shoes, etc & their big "sports sweatshirts" with their names on it & stuff & sent it "back to dads". I don't want to be a bother about it all but maybe I can do better with separating & letting go.
Maybe finding a balance with both could be achieved. A little play, a little decluttering. I also know that if the kids aren't coming around to help, then they don't want the stuff. Most grown kids don't care about our 'stuff' or theirs for that matter.
I had to pack everything up because it was hurting looking at it, but I did not get rid of it. All my documents, photos, cherished items are in a closet waiting for a later date, maybe a book one day, who knows. I am not a minimalist, but it felt great to clear my home of unneeded clutter. My home now only has things out that I love to look at and clean. Things I use. I am creative, so I have two rooms set aside to be my art rooms. To be messy. My home used to be cluttered with memories that triggered me and took me spiraling to my past. Today, my home is my sanctuary. I am creating it to be exactly what I want. I love my home today. It makes me smile walking in the front door. I wish everyone felt that way. Peaceful and safe. Hugs. 🥰
So glad you understand why some of us would never wear the minimalist label. Mind you, the clutter I've turned out is not my own, but left by others who have been given refuge over the years and moved on leaving belongings behind. On the subject of gifts, we suggested some years ago that we would no longer exchange unwanted stuff and everyone was so relieved. Not many if us left now, but instead we donate to whatever charity concerns us. When I was young we always bore gifts when visiting, things like a jar of jam or flowers from the garden, homemade cookies. We no longer buy supermarket cards either, instead an occasional letter, and last week I received a beautifully written one, especially for me❤
So many good points in this video. I am puzzled by minimalists who are proud at being able to count the number of things they own. That’s my definition of poverty!
I just found your channel and so this is the first of your videos that I have watched. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I love your calm, balanced, and nuanced approach to the question of what we might need or not need as we move into retirement. I am entering that phase of my life in the next month, after 57 years of either studying or working. My biggest issue is the quantity of books in my house. I have been decluttering quite a lot but have reached the point where I am very grateful for the vast amount of books that still remain because these are going to be incredibly important to me in this new phase of my life. I do not like reading on a Kindle and I’m not much of a fan of audiobooks, and for me a hardcopy is just such a delicious experience. So, I am treasuring my bulging bookcases. You sound like a very thoughtful person and one of my retirement projects will be to work through your backlist of videos. You have a new subscriber from Melbourne, Australia.
Gifts are not for me. but receiver..good point. I tell my girls, I don't need anything, but I can't stop them. But they have dialed back on gifts and give flowers. I prefer they don't spend 6.00 on cards...in fact that drive me crazy. I tell them to save their money. I have started to minimalism my you tube watching also. Stopped watching videos that are wasting my time. Of course I still watch your you tube as it has value. Joan
Such good advice because I often these Minimalist videos make me feel unsuccessful as I do not want to get rid of all my things. They want to live that way doesn't mean I will do well at it. so I have quit watching 98% of them. and have gone back to enjoying other types of living portrayed on here, a lovely home with memories is what I want. Thank you so much for broaching this subject. Happy Father's Day , Blessings to you and yours.
Very well said! I grew up with one parent who kept everything (not really hoarding style, but kept everything) and another parent who liked to get rid of any unnecessary items. We are currently having to deal with an entire life's worth of items at my parents' homestead. It is such a burden and a stress on all of us. Because of this, I am ready to completely clean out my home of anything extra. I do not want to put my kids through this. I just graduated my last kiddo from high school and now I feel I can finally let go of many things I've been hanging on to. I'm ready for my next chapter! With less stuff!!! Thank you for your balanced look at minimalism!!
Two expressions grabbed me. The first was "the cane in the corner". So evocative! The breadth and depth of many lives are tucked into five little words. It is beautifully sad and sadly beautiful. The second expression was in the line "There is a middle ground of minimalism." Middle ground minimalism--that sounds powerful and healthy! Extremes are easy to begin to pursue, but the determination to hold the middle ground requires a lot of individuality and strength.
I remember seeing a video talking about the ornate designs and extra flair in traditional architecture and common objects in cities such as railings and poles. We removed these embellishments and replaced them with cookie cutter minimalist designs. They said, "if art is an expression of ourselves, then what do these designs say about us"? Art, certain objects, and architecture ground us and remind us of who we are as a culture, family, person, etc.
Tim, this is one of the most genuine and thought provoking videos on the subject of being a minimalist that I've ever listened to. You made some wonderful and thoughtful statements that resonated with me. I've been trying to declutter for some time and continuosly 'put it off' (a.k.a. procrastinate 😅). I do want to pare down my belongings but I have no desire to become a true minimalist which is I'm sure very satisfying to many people but it's not a goal for me.. However, hearing your wise thoughts and comments may have very well inspired me to get to my 'paring down', rather than thinking that I have to do a full sweep of things. Your delivery of all of your videos is done with quiet consideration and I applaud you, 🎉
Mixed family here. Some zealous minimalists, some organised and adhering to the William Morrris adage of only have I your home that which is useful or beautiful, some with a bit of additional stuff in the attic and one old absolute and horrific hoarder. We now only give food gifts to each other. It works for us all.
I agree there's a dark side to minimalism, and you've made some great points. The choice to live a life of minimalism is fine as long as it's not treated like a religion and a person doesn't employ tactics to "evangelize" and impose guilt upon others who choose not to live that way. It feels as though that's what's happening in our society! I love being surrounded by beauty and things that matter to me. Creating my home and what's in it gives me my personal identity. It gives allowance for memories to live there. I live within my space to please myself and how it makes me feel. I make sure I have enough for guests to be welcomed in my home. When I observe the extreme of an empty, colorless, boring, sterile home, I can't help but wonder if the person who lives there has an empty heart, too. I wonder why they won't allow themselves to be attached to anything....
It is a spectrum. You have hoarders on one end and empty room people on the other. Most of us fall somewhere in between. As for me, I declutter because I need the room and if I don't use or like it, then it goes. They say we spend the first 40 years of our lives buying stuff and the last 40 getting rid of most of it (i.e. Swedish Death Cleaning). I'm in my 7th decade of life and it makes sense for a multitude of reasons. The time is now while I'm still strong enough and in relatively good health. Been my experience that either you make the decision or the decision will be made for you.
The spectrum part is so important to address. It seems like people get caught up in the label, then criticize others when their idea of minimalism isnt what a person is doing. There is no one size fits all for the minimalism lifestyle.
Just a thought, giving a gift that is not a gift but has to be passed on, is not a gift. It's passing on what you want. A gift is one of appreciation. There is a big misconception that a gift should be appreciated and valued. What you like, the recipient may not. As for minimalism, that's a personal choice. I left a minimalist FB group when parents started throwing out their children's things without the child's or teen's knowledge. It has gone too far. Throwing out one's things that one loves, is throwing out one's self. Your identity is tossed in the landfill and no longer has joy to the one pressured to throw things out. Good video. 🎉
again common sense wisdom compassion empathy kindness patience understanding forgiveness of self and humanity....keep preaching teaching sharing...you rock...
I’m into the frugal lifestyle as a result of the vagaries of life. I am not Minimaliist. And a bit t past the age of Fire. I find the personal finance investing and planning lifestyle a challenge. But all these same issues have been brought up in the discussions of all these related groups for years. Literalists, those w fewer resources, and just plain contrary people enter into the discussions. You do you. Others have to live with their own circumstances you cannot be responsible for everyone’s emotional issues. Thank you for your thoughtful channel.
Tim is an excellent speaker. I contract with mental health speakers for conferences and seminar development. He's more on-point than many PhD psychologists! I loved this. ❤
I am about to reduce again. The last five yrs have been a huge challenge. Selling mom’s house, the farm with lodge, my stored stuff and my last house in the US. I am about to leave for a few years, so down sizing again! In five years I have accumulated so much from the three homes I tried to sell out!!! lol Memories……..going make more memories!
I can't stand to look at a hoarder's home. I don't ever want to go into one. I realize some may have a mental problem but some are just lazy and won't organize or clean.
I enjoy my stuff and I never know when an idea will take root for something and I’ll wish I had that item. I figure if none of our kids want our stuff then give it away or throw it away. I’ll be beyond caring at that point so it won’t matter. At the cost to replace any of it at todays prices I think I’ll just hang on to what I’ve got Thankyou. That’s my little joys in life.
I'm 58 and I worked hard to buy lovely (but not expensive) items for my house, wardrobe, art materials, etc. I am tempted to declutter when I'm older, especially books, not-very-good photos (I print them all!) because I forget what I have or I don't have time to look at it, use it, enjoy it, wear it, etc. However I want to be careful and intentional about this as I would not be able to buy these items again, some are irreplaceable, others would cost too much or would be difficult to find. So I will proceed with care. I like to live simply, I would not say I am a minimalist but less can definitely be more. Minimalism can be a little clinical. I don't like hoarding things but I like to be comfortable since I have the space, and I like to have around me the things I like. I do think I would like to move abroad one day and the stuff I have stops me doing it because I don't want to downsize my accommodation or leave my possessions behind. As I get older I will hopefully have the chance to review what to keep and what to get rid of, I would hate anyone who inherits to just give up and put everything in the rubbish, I need to separate the good from the dispensable and maybe make others happy in the process by giving some things away. I started yesterday with some items of clothing.
This video is so important. I have read FB posts about people struggling with trying to declutter things that they want to keep and feeling guilty because they don't get rid of some things. Many people really struggle to do it perfectly, which we all know perfection isn't attainable. I was glad to hear what you had to say and I hope more people listen to it.
Minimalism is not about deprivation or Isolation. It's about decluttering and being mindful of purchases. It's frees us from irrational wasteful spending. Thus increasing available Cash. A Win Win in my book.
Americans have a tendency to take things to far ..as a Swede bought up with the nordic famous "minimalism" lifestyle some things i see in the Us vlogs are just plain weird.
It's only if someone feels superior or inferior for what they have chosen to do. As a maximalist, I love all my beautiful pieces, and they bring me unending joy. But the key is are you attached, could you sell it or give it away, do you worry about it? I am constantly rotating things and enjoy that experience. I'm have an Etsy shop so it's fun to see it go off and be enjoyed by someone new. Bottom line, in my opinion: things shouldn't control you.
Your video was so on point and although in my home I do not like “ clutter “ I love going into my neighbours home and seeing all her treasures and photographs that adorn her home on every surface as they demonstrate a life fulfilled and loved. The biggest and most significant point for me however was your comment that gifts you give are not for you but the receiver. I am not religious but have two sisters that are, when my wonderful husband died two years ago my evangelical sister gave me a book of religious, biblical texts that upset me as I thought this fitted her own agenda but demonstrated no empathy for me. I know this digresses slightly from the aim of your video but your words in that sentence struck such a strong chord within me . Thank you for sharing your insight and wisdom, kind regards June in the UK. Ps, books are one of my passions and I love seeing them in my home and keeping them close to me x
In regard to your sister's gift to you, you don't have to keep it. Within a year of being widowed, I had to get rid of all of the sympathy cards because they caused an emotional hook even when I put them into a cupboard. Also, I redid our massive garden to make it easier to tend. I bought 10 large wooden planters. Then, my husband's sister brought plants for each one. Groan. Only one plant was on my list. It messed up my 'seasonal' flowering ideas. She kept checking them. I was stuck with this until I downsized 5 years later. Take care. Great care. @kzZnAT0r
In Denmark they have what they call hygge ( pronounced whu-ga). They consider it as cozyness but they have a form of minimalism. They don't get rid of everything. Also when decorate ring I have a black plastic bag, a donation box and a time will tell box which I learned from the Minimal Mom. Unlike her I will not be getting rid of 85% of my stuff. But if you haven't reached for something specific in your Time Will Tell box in a year (except in my case not sentimental things which go in bins) then its safe to let it go. I know that was kind of long winded. Sorry. Thanks for us remix minimalist not feel so bad.😁
Thank you! I have been trying to find content about the drawbacks and regrets of minimalism, but all I find are videos that essentially all say "watch this video about what I regret about minimalism.... Nothing! It's 💯 great".
I enjoyed listening to your thoughts on minimalism. I have been an avid declutterer for decades and helped a number of others to declutter their homes. I believe that you should have the amount of stuff that suits you. If removing all your furniture and sleeping on yoga mats on the floor suits you, do that. I value people over stuff and that can mean that my family has a range in levels of stuff at different times. We should each be able to have our needs met even when they differ. My daughter loves books and will continue to add bookshelves to accommodate her growing library. I love knitting, but not yarn that is old, musty or dusty so I keep a small, working stash that fits on one shelf. We are both happy with our level of stuff, it suits our needs and stages of life.
To comfort a bereaved dog owner, I gave her as a gift a certificate to say I had sponsored a rescued pet. She did not look at all happy. I realise it was a gift for me, but even so it still came as a surprise how uncharitable and unsympathetic she showed herself to be towards rescue animals. It's disappointing your children did not make use of your gifts to benefit others.
So happy your video showed up in my feed. I agree wholeheartedly with each point you presented. Some of the minimalists I've seen on YT live in stark and cold looking homes. There's no sense of personality. I've been purging things I no longer need, use or enjoy for a year and it feels great to not be a slave caring for them. I agree, though, it does feel a bit elitist if I am being honest. Best to not talk about it much! Thanks for your frank, informative talk.
I'm a minimalist traveling full-time in an RV, and I’ve explained to family and friends that gifts cause me to remove something from my RV. I give throughout the year, instead of during the holiday season, and acknowledge birthdays and other holidays with phone calls or visits. I've learned not to be guided by the commercialism of designated holidays and enjoy family and friends throughout my life with face time phone calls, in-person visits
I embrace the dark side of organized chaos! I’m the ‘queen of my house’, if something is ‘not in favor’ I get rid of it! Thats my method. Does that count?
I absolutely love this video. All of your points are so spot on. The idea of minimalism for me was just not spending every waking moment cleaning but the two didn't go together because I will clean but there were always areas with visual clutter. Once I realized what caused me anxiety and dealt with those areas I felt so much more at peace in my space.
Love your take on this. I’m a 70 year old creator on the Tubes who’s lived a simpler life for 50 years. I’m a father and grandfather who really gets your take on generational relationships. I love my kids, they love me. I can buy them any gift… they get so frustrated when I can’t think what I wanted for my recent 70th. Your take varies a little from mine…. And that’s what I love. We’re all individuals.
Love the nuanced discussion about the cons, especially how minimalism can be a privilege and might not suit everyone. Subscribed because it's nice to see a real person talking about it in such a respectful informative way.
I am a minimalist. Rather than rehoming my bits and bobs, I have decided to use what I have until it's trash worthy. It's not about passing stuff on. It's about stopping the behavior.
Great video! ❤ My husband and I were minimalist long before covid started, and we had friends over pretty frequently. I bought extra dishes and utensils at the thrift store and donated them back when our get- together were over. Or we bought compostable utensils and plates for less formal gatherings. Nobody judged us for being minimalist, and several of our friends are borderline "hoarders." We never judge them either. But minimalism changed our lives in so many positive ways, we're never going back to how we lived before. In 2023, I wore the same dress every day for the entire year. 😂 just to see if it was doable. I didn't start getting bored until around October 😅 I want to do it again maybe try going 18 months next time and sew a different dress. I donated the dress I wore for the year. you don't have to go full bore minimalism but I suggest clearing out spaces and leaving them empty. Negative space must have health benefits because we feel so much calmer and happier in our [half empty] house.
You are absolutely right! All good points and well thought out. We all have a different journey and minimalism isn’t for everyone. Thanks and have a good day😊.
Very wise words and quite a few hit home. Gives me a new perspective on my perfectionism Yesterday I was looking at my books and wanted to declutter, but then I thought better of it. These books are a part of my history and fit perfectly. I‘ll leave them where they are. I found out about the mental aspect in a hard way already. I threw away a broken toy and one of my adult children was so sad about that… Decluttering has been good for my mental health though, the house is more peaceful. I have never replaced things with „required“ minimalist objects. That would‘ve been a waste of money. I‘m definitely guilty of eying other people‘s cluttered homes, especially when I see how it affects their mental and family life and I have to restrain myself from re-organizing. Sorry for the long-winded response, but it helped me to organize my thoughts. New sub!
That was a very interesting and insightful video. I know a number of people who have struggled to "declutter" their lives - as have I- and I will be forwarding this vid to a good friend. You're right - it CAN be overwhelming. Where to start? So many decisions to make and family to consult. I don't really think that I want to fully embrace minimalism. My goal is to let go of the things up in cupboards that I haven't used in years (but I MIGHT need that some day - hahaha!) and reduce my belongings to the point where they don't bother me with the space they take up, physically and emotionally. It seems to be a much longer and more complicated process than I initially anticipated!! Your comments were helpful.
Erica Lucas coin the phrase "Minimalish" on her UA-cam channel. I like that word and find it a happy medium because I am keeping what I love and truly use and I am finding it easier to let go of things because I am using this as my guide.
That popped up in a timely manner. I’m in the middle of the Swedish Death Purge in my home of 43 years. (I’m fine, that’s just the name of the purge.) There have been two rebuilds due to natural disasters, but it’s amazing how many family heirlooms survived. It’s also amazing how much has come into the house since the disasters that I don’t want anymore. I wonder if the kindness and help from so many people during those events has made me feel guilty about passing along those newer things I don’t really want. I’ve slowed in my purge, but there are still a lot of books and paperwork to bag and bin.
So glad this video popped up on my feed. I enjoyed your humor, your thoughtful articulation of the issue, and the high quality of your production. Bravo!
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Respect!
My daughter is a happy minimalist. At aged 22, she was asked to help clean for an elderly lady. Each room was full of tacky nick-knacks - gifts from her travelling children. My daughter earned extra just cleaning them. She suggested the lady decluttered gradually. She did. The lady was transformed. She'd been afraid to upset her kids who didn't even visit. That progressed to my daughter updating and repainting the entire house. Then, they did the garden. They became the closest of friends for 15 years. The lady died in her 90's.
Then, she started on me...😂😂😂
Love it.
Great story!
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What a lovely daughter😍
My grandparents, born in the 30s, were minimalists, but they just called it being frugal and not buying crap u don’t need. It’s not a new thing.
100% my parents too. Also born in 1930's. WW2 made people see things differently.
My grandparents born in 1910s called "we can't afford it, anyway".
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It is a new thing. They didn’t have to have a massive downsize to get there. They weren’t having to recognise the gross and rampant over consumption that is a characteristic of our lives. There was no Shein, Temu or online shopping. It is absolutely a ‘new’ thing.
Good points. My wife and I have used the lessons of minimalism to help us declutter our house, but we are definitely not minimalists. Our closets are no longer stuffed and our books fit on our bookshelves with room to spare. The odd items we stored in the attic and basement because we didn't really want them but couldn't part with them have been given new homes. The house looks much better. It's more restful and is easier to clean. All good things. But, we still have our hobbies and our sentimental items. For us, it's not a new religion and it should not become a new religion. Everything in moderation and that includes minimalism or essentialism. Just my two cents.
Well said. I look at totes full of personal items and keep putting off the chore of donating trash keep process. Any suggestions?
My approach as well.
I agree completely. Although I do find I need the occasional purge days to boast my good highs.
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I was on a minimalism group years ago but had to leave. There was this weird competition going on between a few of the people. "We are down to one fork, spoon, plate, bowl, and cup per person." They were sleeping on the floor because they got rid of their furniture, and had two pairs of socks, underwear, pants, and shirts. I'm sorry, that's not me. I like order, I like beauty, I like looking around my house and seeing things that bring me joy (yes, Marie Kondo did resonate with me). Everything has to go through our own personalized filter. Emptiness *to me* is not beautiful. But neither is hoarding. Don't let others define your balance. Find your joy.
That's nutty to have 1 fork. Small things that don't take much space
I did only have two bowls, two large bowls, and two plates for a long time, which worked well for me but I've added to my collection and I think that's a good thing. Only one set of silverware per person is not a life I ever want to live. I truly don’t understand the obsession to downsize so much.
Well said
Carrying only one fork, spoon, bowl, and sleeping on the floor is okay for camping, but people have not historically chosen this when they have a home. When an idea like this is so new, it doesn't seem like it's just a natural desire. In other words, at this extreme it could be a fad or a cult or a mental illness. Or maybe people want to be monks. There *have* been monks.
When two or more people follow together the same ism … it’s a cult !
My relative lives in a minimalist apartment and is so bored at 70 that he has to keep working because he has nothing to do at home. My own house is a cluttered cosy mess filled with books and hobbies and photos and stationery. I'm never bored. However, there is probably a happy medium that neither of us has achieved.
That is going way too far for me. For an elderly person to not have anything of interest in their life besides working is extremely sad. I'm not a hobby type person but I enjoy reading and music so those kind of things I would still want to have in my life and my home.
The only thing he can do outside his home is work?Conjuring up images of your home and his home, thinking of yours provides a stress response. I'd take his home, and volunteer, travel, hike, swim, fish, go to the gym; essentially anything I want!
Yea from time to time I will get lost in a good book and I LOVE 💕 it!! It’s like a vacation!
TT Maybe you could get your relative interested in birding and/or bird photography? I think there are more men 'birders' than women...but anyway you could do it together!
My dream would be the minimalist apartment with plenty of activities outside the home (book club, hiking group, movie club, video games).
Minimalism in moderation is a good thing
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For you it is
Or maximalism in moderation is good 😂
I’m 62 and find myself minimizing my life! I’m so much more comfortable with less stuff around me. I think cleaning out my parents home of 60 years after their passing pushed me further into minimalism! My children really don’t want a lot of what I’ve saved for them. Less is more for me!
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Less is more…so true🤍
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Yep even though my craft room is cluttered it is totally functional, the rest of our house is relatively minimalist to keep us stress-free and we learned this by having to clean out many older relatives domiciles as they passed into care facilities or the next life.
I've warned my mother that when she passes, I will move a dumpster into her driveway and just start dumping things into it because her house is so cluttered and her closets are stuffed full w things she's forgotten she's bought still w tags on it!
I've told her, she'll go broke saving that much money on things she doesn't need LOL!
I think there’s a happy medium somewhere between an empty museum look and a chaotic jampacked environment.
Agreed!
@@TheNewRetiredMe Tim I think your place is a good example of that happy medium😁
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You are so right. I embraced minimilism at a bad time in my life. When I began to recover, minimalism was doing more harm than good to my mental health. It was as if my identity was disappearing. I'm no longer a minimalism. I'm me with stuff around me. No mess, no clutter. Just me and the things I love, need and are of sentimental value.
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I love that you say “I’m just me.“. I no longer identify myself with my career title/license designation.
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My goal for decluttering was minimal-ish. BUT as I reduced what I realized is only having what I truly needed meant not having enough dishes to host people if I wanted to. It meant reducing my belongings to the point where I had enough for me, but it pushed others out. Not enough seating, not enough beds to sleep on if someone were to stay. I kind of met it in the middle and have enough dishes to host 6 people, and a guest bed to let someone come stay. I still have very reduced belongings, but I've brought back what I felt was needed to let others in and be comfortable.
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💯 This is how I want to live. I went through a phase when moving cities and countries where I had little more than my clothes, as what possessions I had were in storage for about a year. It felt good in some ways to travel light but as you relate, it can make it hard to invite others in, at least in a meaningful way. So I am grateful for my spare room, spare bed, crockery and cutlery as I have been able to host family members and friends from afar recently. Being able to offer hospitality occasionally brings me satisfaction, dare I say joy, that living minimally for a year somehow didn’t.
My biggest objection to the minimalist lifestyle, comes from experience. I purchased a small electric saw to trim the trees on my property, before putting it up for sale. A minimalist neighbour could not resist making fun of my purchase. But, as soon as several trees fell on her roof during a storm a week later, her room-mate was knocking on my door wanting to borrow said saw. My motto is: Never a borrower or lender be. The same neighbour refuses to carry a pen and notepad in her handbag, but is quick to ask to borrow mine. I find such behaviour annoying to put it mildly. As a mindful and frugal Prepper, I stash food to mitigate inflation and shortages. When it comes to dry goods, I buy high quality items in next to new condition. I prepare for man-made and natural disasters as well as the future illness or injury. All the more important when one lives alone. To discover that many do not even have enough food on hand to last three days is shocking. It is important to me be independent and resilient. It is clear, that many minimalists are about depending upon others, a behaviour I will never agree with. I also find it cold, when some refuse to hold onto photos, or possessions of departed family members. I will always feel sentimental towards family members. friends and pets who have died, I wish to remember them fondly. I treasure my mother's gardening trowel as well as her oak sewing drawers, and my father's books about ocean voyages, my relatives were well-known explorers. I also have a few of his hand tools, he was joiner. My mother used to say, " All things in moderation." I believe that also applies to minimalism. Being a fanatic about anything is often never a good idea. Rant over!
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Yes!
@@knotyourguru Right, so what do you do when you have items needed and don't have, besides borrowing?
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Beautifully stated .
To me, minimalism is about keeping what matters and letting go of the rest. It allows me to enjoy the things I love to the maximum without being distracted by things that don’t enhance my life. I’ve seen maximalist homes that serve the same purpose and joy for their owners. We shouldn’t be deciding for others what is clutter, that is why you should never declutter for friends or family members unless it’s done working with them on what’s kept and let go without judgement. It’s everyone’s own, unique personal journey.
Well said. I never sort my husband's stuff or even suggest he parts with all the old 1970s Pioneer stereo and vinyls, the old cameras and tape decks, amplifiers and Ditton 44 speakers, which he enjoys dusting. His workshop is immaculate, everything filed to perfection.
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100% agree with this ❤
The Pioneer stereo is literally irreplaceable now.
My son will disown me if I get rid of mine! @@jennywren8937
Boy! You hit the bullseye 🎯 on this. “A cultural elitism surrounding minimalism.” 👍
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When my friend, who has reduced her material items to a minimum, comes to visit me, I feel judged. She literally does a scan in my home and makes unappreciated comment on my stuff. I’ve learned to just accept that we’re different. The items in my home give me joy…the pictures, books, and mementos that are fond memories for me.
There are interesting stories behind items in my home, a history, a reflection, a memory of those I loved, appreciation of crafted items, pictures, tapestries and clothes made for me by my mother, the most treasured sometimes of small or no monetary value, like a wood carving made by my FIL when he was a young lad raised in Thetford Forest, or a torn fragment in the desk drawer bearing a poem by Tagore. Like you, I love my home and all that I have. Enjoy.
@@jennywren8937 That’s absolutely beautiful. Thank you for sharing. I, too, have a gold brocade dress my grandmother, who lived with us, made. She hand beaded the bodice and trim of the dress. I’m so grateful for this small but meaningful memento, and it’s a reminder to me of her love and dedication to her craft and our family.
@@divinecomedy0How lovely. I've no family interested in my things, so they will eventually have to go to auction. With this in mind I have sewn a picture of my grandmother b1880, into the family christening dress, along with her home which is on Ancestry. I plan labelling the tapestries and pictures with details which may interest future owners, having inherited items already marked this way.
@@jennywren8937 Wow! I’m blown away. You seem to have a talent that will literally go down in history. 🌟
@@divinecomedy0maybe meet your friend out for lunch or coffee.
Somewhere you both like, you don’t need to feel judged in your surroundings.
Easier on you 😊
I can't be a minimalist. I get bored easily, I love having lots of projects to do and things to create with, lots of nostalgic, interesting and beautifuli things around me!!😊
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I'm not a minimalist... I'm a mineralist. I think it's a good idea to have all the necessary minerals in your life.
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You might be a maximalist!
I'm very creative so I need a good supply of materials that I keep in its place
I am 79 yrs old. I have younger friends and a daughter and son-in-law who live minimalist lifestyle. I am working on de-cluttering now. When I am in the minimalist homes, i begin to get restless. It is like a hotel lounge or business with only necessary furniture. I don't like the feeling of wanting to get out of there, because these are friends and family, but those places don't feel like a "home" to me.
Absolutely 100% agree with your comment. They feel like a “hotel lounge or business with only the necessary furniture.” EXACTLY
Are you there to visit them or their stuff?
@@cathypaulino2153 Yes but stuff are a reflection of the individual; a life lived. It's like looking through a record collection or a person's book shelf. The objects we invest in whether monetarily or emotionally are important to us. The memories I have of my late mother's home are comforting. Her house was cluttered with decades of stuff that gave her joy. It was a pain to clear but I'm grateful for the experience of going down memory lane. So both is the answer.
Ive been in some, especially those.painted in the.current prison grey, morgue white,.etc., that reminded.me.of the prisons, hospitals, laboratories, and institutions in which ive.worked. I would not be happy living in a space that looks.like a cell in a Supermax prison.
My house looks a bit like the Burrow, the Weasley's house in Harry Potter. We have plants, seeds sprouting in baby food jars, kids art projects, the sewing room and my knitting bag and the shelf of animal medications for the pets and the horses and the goats, the piano.and three guitars.and seven recorders and tinwhistles,.and tons of books, which we actually.do read.
It's a family home, not a monastic cloister or a jail.
@@cathypaulino2153There's a lot of the people in the things they have snd keep that are beyond the necessities. What's wrong with experiencing the whole person & their chosen things?
Always ask. Thank you for saying this out loud. My mother-in-law threw out anything and everything from my sentimental husband’s childhood, which broke his heart when he found out, and still breaks mine whenever I think about it. Always ask first before getting rid of something in your home that your kids might want, especially if it’s theirs to begin with.
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Absolutely!
Similar thing here, my mom has saved tons of mementos from my childhood, my husband has almost nothing. It is sad.
Grown up children should take their treasures to their own home.
Thank you for your balanced approach to lifestyle choices. I am 70 years old. I am living on a small income, as I was disabled in my forth decade.. i can not afford to buy new. I take care of my clothing by mostly hand washing. I like to look nice when I do go out because I feel better about myself, and others treat me with more respect. Consequently, I have a plethora of clothing. I need for them to last. I don't know how long I will live, but I must maintain my dignity. Books are the other issue. I read only good literature and, as a result, want to read them more than once. Other than that, I don't care about stuff, with the exception of family photos and albums. Too bleak without my book friends around.
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Books are family too!
Thought provoking as always Tim.
I grew up as a "minimalist by necessity" as a child in a large and poor family. I was happy with what I had at the time.
In my 20s, I bought all the things I thought I wanted.
The clutter and debt was overwhelming.
Now I'm a "minimalist by choice" and finding my way back to a sense of peace. I do believe that simplicity has been great for my mental health.
I don't subscribe to "extreme minimalism". Many people think this is the only way to live as a minimalist.
It's not.
I'm a "cozy minimalist" where my focus isn't owning the least amount possible - it's just eliminating the excess. Uncovering what I actually love.
My priority is to step away from the mindless consumption that marketing has made us believe should be part of our regular lives and live and spend intentionally.
The "trendy" aspect of minimalism bothers me because I see many people capitalizing on the "trend" rather than actually understanding minimalism as a lifestyle. For example - "extreme declutters" followed the next week by "hauls" and strict beliefs about what minimalist homes "should" look like.
I think "Journey" is the right word Tim.
For me, minimalism has enhanced so many aspects of my life and it's been a process that's allowed me to work through so much trauma as I slowly work through the clutter and find my way back to a simpler life.
I hope everyone has a great Tuesday ❤
Good point of view, simply.clutterfree. I love watching minimalist channels and especially those mostly concerned with “clean with me” themes, as any of those are inspiring! (But also unachievable for some of us die-hards 🥸😂)
I agree - Tim provided us all with another thought provoking UA-cam! But, so did you - thanks!!
@@debnelson3979 Thank you! 🥰🥰🥰
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I don’t know why everything always has to be taken to an extreme. It is about less consuming. It used to be about living a simple life. Reprioritizing what is important. Having a smaller imprint. The videos I saw about minimalism where they give everything away to buy minimalist furniture is not about living a simple life at all. It’s about image and identity. Minimalism today sounds similar to anorexia. You totally explained what most people do with the concept of living more minimalistic.
Anorexia is a great analogy for some forms of minimalism.
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There’s another dark side to minimalism too. The opposite of over-consumption is purging. So instead of buying more and more and hoarding, people like me go the other way and look for possessions and stuff they can get rid of every time they get upset or anxious. I used to suffer from bulimia but I can’t do that anymore basically because I wrecked my insides and not because the need went away. So now I have to be constantly vigilant and stop myself from getting rid of stuff.
Thank you. You are so right!
I love getting rid of stuff, I akin it to the high that people who like to shop get from purchasing things they never use and often never leave the bag, I get a high out of getting rid of stuff. It makes me feel good especially for something large like a piece of furniture. It feels freeing like I can breathe.
Kiki, try to get out into nature and countryside, places where things don't matter. A yoga holiday in the countryside just for a weekend maybe. ❤️
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I have compared extreme minimalism with an anorexic mentality.
I've found minimalist living has been most beneficial not because of the need to eliminate things but rather people in some cases. I now go to lunch sometimes in a grocery store, much cheaper and no tip required but frankly the staff there are more friendly. Also as part of my journey to a better me I quit drinking, the plan was temporary but I stayed in the same places and drank non alcoholic drinks, people treated me differently and I realized I didn't have that many friends. Im good with it though. Because now I know.
I'm a maximalist! I've got some lovely things, and also have hobbies of knitting, crochet and sewing. We live in much smaller spaces in the UK, so it doesn't take much. If it's no longer useful though, i freecycle or give it to charity. People always say how they like my stuff, so i guess it's attractive. Thanks for this take on it, balance is my goal!
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Absolutely, I have a giveaway corner of things that I will recycle or donate to charity, if they're no longer necessary to me in my life - I send them along their way into the great material continuum to be enjoyed by others : )
I love moreism. The more funny things I have the happier I am. Minimalism scares me. It's like an empty mind. There's nothing there. Nothing to talk about, laugh about, look at, enjoy. Just a blank. Each to their own. Some need nothingness.
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Some good points here. I have found myself unsubscribing from a bunch of channels that were all about decluttering, but I found they were constantly buying new things, decluttering, buying, decluttering. It was exhausting. I’m trying to live more intentionally with my journey to minimalism. Refinishing old furniture, recycling old textiles, mending clothing where I can, etc. it’s taken some years to get to this point but I think I’m finally seeing the light.
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I once paid someone to come help me declutter, and all she did was to tell me to buy containers to store it better. 😢
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Having listened to this, I´m more convinced you must have been a fabuous teacher/preacher because you look at and listen to people more closely and you do understand so may different points of view and needs. So impressive!
Thank you!
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“ use it up,
wear it out ,
make do,
do without “
Frugality
Very practical.
Balance and purpose are good indicators of a peaceful and comfortable environment.
Oh, I remember that old-school saying from the Depression Years!!!
"Use it up, Wear it out, Make it do, Or do without." Thank you so much for reminding me of that!!! 😅
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I’ve found giving gifts to my daughter usually left me feeling empty, when those gifts seemed unappreciated, and ultimately returned. I now ask what she would like or could use. It’s brought more joy in me, the giver, and my daughter, the receiver. I’ve found she mostly requests things that are needed for her health.
Mom would send checks. My sister used it to pay bills. Mom understood but was upset. I learned to fib a bit.
I don’t have attachments to stuff…I’m not a minimalist , but no where. Near a hoarder. hoarders can’t part with not only family heirlooms ( to the ones I know, they can’t part with relatives furniture, china, even holiday decor ….But IMO it’s stuff ! I do ask my girls if they want things before tossing, but I don’t feel bad they didn’t want my moms china, neither did I as it was what she liked, not me
My thinking is we came into this world with nothing, we will take nothing with us. As for my Hoarding friends, I feel so bad for their kids, they will have to rent roll offs to get rid of all that stuff…that’s one thing I will not burden my kids with. Did I mention I know of people that can not allow anyone, even family members into their home because of their hoarding. I’m sorry, but to turn away your loved ones that are present, because your house is full of deceased family furniture and not only your stuff but theirs is just wrong.
I don’t have attachments to stuff…I’m not a minimalist , but no where. Near a hoarder. hoarders can’t part with not only family heirlooms ( to the ones I know, they can’t part with relatives furniture, china, even holiday decor ….But IMO it’s stuff ! I do ask my girls if they want things before tossing, but I don’t feel bad they didn’t want my moms china, neither did I as it was what she liked, not me
My thinking is we came into this world with nothing, we will take nothing with us. As for my Hoarding friends, I feel so bad for their kids, they will have to rent roll offs to get rid of all that stuff…that’s one thing I will not burden my kids with.
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Tim, I don't really consider myself a minimalist, but I don't like clutter. I am uncomfortable when visiting someone's home that has more "clutter" than my own. I don't say anything or do anything it's just a feeling. Sometimes I feel that something doesn't fit in my own home but because of memories or sentimental attachment I cannot send the item away. However, I have told family members that when I am gone they can feel free to give away everything I own without any regrets. 😊
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We as a family do not give Christmas gifts anymore. I think that economic privilege and all the negativity used to describe minimalism is much ado about nothing. If you are older, do your kids a favor and clear out the clutter so that your kids do not have to do it. I do have judgments about people that are hoarders, I live next door to one and have to look at their piles every time I go outside of my house. Take responsibility for your clutter.
Yes. I believe the process of clearing things out if is one older is called Swedish Death Cleaning. Makes a lot of sense.
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You have no idea the absolute gift you are giving your children by relieving them of the burden of having to get rid of your stuff when they will be grieving. Thanks on their behalf! 😄
Try not to be too hard on your neighbors, though. Hoarding can be a mental illness. And if it's really bad, the authorities might need to step in.
I had a neighbor like that and asked the town about junk yard rules and they followed up with warnings to them so they cleaned up for a bit so I sold my house while his was looking better. I drove by a few weeks ago and it’s worse than ever!
Excellent advice as always and always thought provoking. As I clean out I do ask my kids if they want things that I no longer use, or things that belonged to their father or grand parents. I remember a sword that my grandmother had that belonged to my 2nd great grandfather who fought in the Civil War. That was passed on to a 3rd cousin. I recently asked that cousin if he still had the sword and he told me that he treasures it along with the ring that he was given by my grandmother. My mother had a painting that was painted by this cousins grandmother. He was thrilled to get it. I was given a shell purse that was purchased in Atlantic City in 1879. It was bought by my 2nd great grandmother for her daughter when she was 8. It was passed to me by my grandmother and I passed it to my daughter to give to her daughter. Another item I treasure is a Jackfield cow creamer that was brought over from Wales in 1869 by another 2nd great grandmother. These things were not used. They were kept in closets and drawers and in a cabinet to be treasured by future generations.
In my process of decluttering there was an aluminum ash tray that was an item given to the employees of Ford Motor where my husband worked. It has the Ford logo stamped on it. Since no one in the family smokes I thought that I would just discard it. On second thought I asked my son if he wanted it and he was thrilled to get it which very much surprised me. I gave another son a set of drills in a wooden box that belonged to my grandfather who loved wood working. I have furnished my home for 54 years with all of my grandparents furniture which brings back many good memories. The rocking chair I have is one I remember my grandmother rocking me in when I was about 4. I rocked my 3 children in it as well as my grandchildren. The crib I used for my children was one that my mother used for me, my brother, and my sister, as well as 3 cousins. I used it for my 3 children and I passed it to my sister who used it for her 2 children. It was passed back and 3 of my grandchildren used it. My son has it now and will repair it to pass on to his children.
Yours is a true home.
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Those are all excellent points that you brought to light. I am pursuing minimalism in the sense that I’m keeping only the things that bring me joy or that I need, nothing that is just taking up space just for the sake of taking up space. I’m still fighting with the “just in case items” because I’m also frugal. I actually started this journey of decluttering house-wide (Swedish death cleaning) because I don’t want my daughters to have to go through clearing out all my stuff that they won’t want when I’m gone, like my huge assortment of sea shells that I collected when my house was beach themed. I live in Indiana 🙄. I am also on the trying to reduce plastics and to live more eco-friendly train and many, if not all, the points you mentioned go along with that as well. Socially isolating, buying gifts (I ask what the recipient wants now), can be expensive, perfectionism and stress, mentally exhausting, etc. And, yes, judgmental as well. I am getting better at tending my own garden, though. You’re right, a balanced approach is the key to finding the peace within our lives and home. ☮️ Great video 👍🏼I’m off to buy some plants for my pot on my front porch. Maybe I’ll add a few seashells as decoration…😂🐚🪴🌷Have a good day.
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I gave all my seashells collected for over 50 years from 3 different oceans to my son and only granddaughter. They have used them to decorate all around their house...both inside and outside. It brings them joy! And I enjoy their joy and that I can still see the seashells when I'm at their house! ❤
@@lisap963 oh, that’s so great that you still get to enjoy them! Neither of my daughters are interested in mine so I’m going to take them to a consignment store to pass the joy on to someone else! 😊 I may keep one or two, though! 😉
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Whats bugs me when watching the minimalism missionaries on youtube is that most (I get the impression) are ex-hoarders on the rebound. So after having lived in a god-aweful mess, they now opt for a psychiatric-ward bare white walls creepy bland empty abode - which especially breaks my heart when I see that there are children in the house. I have never been a hoarder and I do not like a mess. I do however like asthetically pleasing objects such as quality art and my all time favorite antiques, which always have exquisite workmanship which I really appreciate. No empty white walls for me. On the other hand, I do not even have a garage or a storage room so I do not store things that I do not use.
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I have also wondered how extreme minimalism affects kids, it doesn't seem healthy. Also is it a parent's right to get rid of things their kid likes just because they thinks it's clutter? Interesting topic for sure.
The blessing of living alone is that I
decide what goes or stays. I do not keep things for others to inherit...they have shopped and taken what they want. I am very content with my leather journals and Deneen mugs.
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I absolutely love these commentary style videos of yours. So well-thought out and well written. I enjoy being in a community lead by a wise man. Thank you. ❤
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I had to smile...I tried a bit of sorting as prescribed by some minimalists. Now, I have been doing needed sorting, but I cook...a lot. And I soon realized I need multiple cooking implements in my kitchen, the tools of my life, for speed, convenience. I ended up replacing some things I thought I might not miss. Wrong! My lifestyle isn't the same as many others...I'm uniquely me. And, I think everyone really needs to weigh out his own uniqueness. With age, things will change, and I'll re-evaluate as life progresses.
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Same with me I needed more spatulas pancake flippers whisks etc I had to go out and buy more🤦♀️
So true , I need lots of spoons , wooden , metal , plastic to cook , it’s just a way of life .
I felt bad for minimalists during the covid shutdown: if you only have basic functional items in your home, what happens when you can't leave home? Sitting around glued to a screen? It just seems like it would be really boring.
I was wondering the same thing during the lockdown. I made so many lovely things in my sewing room and read a ton of my books. 💕
we can not assume there was nothing to do...We were busy as always
Tuesday fireside chat with Pastor Tim! Happy Tuesday.
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I've been going to a food bank for a year and a half and I've never been a hoarder, but I've started to pile up cans of beans, chickpeas (garbanzo beans), peas, as well as rice, pasta, dried legumes, all around the house. It looks so cluttered so I'll have to tidy them up by date, etc. I keep thinking that I might need them in future as some food banks now only help you for 4 weeks. It's a constant panic and fear about the future when you are poor. I wish I could afford to leave these cans of beans behind, but they don't expire for at least 2 years and it's free food, so I try to find a place for it, even if it makes me look like a hoarder
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Organize it a bit. Sounds like legitimate preparation. Just try to use the presence of the food you have as a blessing to reduce fear. Bean salad is delicious.
Sir! I am 72 and having to downsize now after becoming a widow. This is the absolute best talk I have ever heard on this subject! I saw my mother go thru the trauma of losing so many things through moving 2 or 3 times after my dad died. She lost many things that she wished she had later through negligent and hasty discarding by family members as they tried to help because they thought she didn't "need" them. I hurt for her as she is still alive and interested at 92 . She still laments about it. I am learning a lot about how to downsize without totally killing off your own personal and unique life. Other people don't really understand the things you have said here. "Do to others as you would have done to you." Think about that, folks.😉 THANK YOU, SIR!
I agree, there needs to be a balance. Everything in moderation. No extremes.
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Um, a lot to unpack here. I think one needs to evaluate their own relationship to 'things'. If excessive it can lead to hoarding. My aunt was an extreme hoarder because she kept a ton of what she perceived as family heirlooms and she did not trust anyone else to take care of them. Well, in time, they were all covered in musty mold because she kept on collecting. She left it all for us to clean up after she died, having so hoarded that she only had an edge of a couch of space left to live on (and die), cat hair and dust an inch thick on the walls, and many other horrors. This is not what one would wish on their heirs to deal with. So, to me, there is a balance to 'things' and if your emotions and identity are over connected to them, time to re-evaluate.
My cousin was an unhealthy hoarder but he gave instructions in his Will for clearance to be carried out by a local couple who made a good living from it, including preparing the property for sale.
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My cousin likewise was a hoarder and I spent a few months helping her out at the end of her life. While cleaning out some paths in her house, I could not find the HVAC cold air return. I searched everywhere but of course every surface, floor, table, and chair was covered with stuff. Finally I found the cold air return in the dining room wall near the floor, with 4 feet of boxes in front of it and about 1 1/2 whole cats worth of cat hair on the grate. I cleaned it, changed the filter, and opened the space. It felt like a major accomplishment!
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I began simplifying and downsizing my life 8 years before I retired in 2020. While not a minimalist, this actually had a financial benefit, bc I was able to relocate easily for work and better pay during my last working years. What remains are the how-to and craft/diy books that I cherish, and family momentos. I gave the valuable antique furniture to my daughter and son-in-law which made them quite happy.
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I’m 74 and doing a lot of decluttering. Gonna have a huge tag sale. I’m doing what I call culling. I no longer need nine pocketbooks, so I make myself “cull” out half or more and maybe leave three! I no longer use evening bags, so I cull those and keep maybe one. Trying to do this all over house. It’s def freeing. We spent weeks cleaning out my 97 year old mother in law’s apartment and she had stuff she’d hadn’t used in 40 years! But I have a nice section of a guest room to do my jigsaw puzzles! Be neat, have less, no storing stuff for “whenever,” keep only what you use often, keep only treasured mementos (just a few!). I never understood storage units for c**p you’ll NEVER probably think about or need again!!!
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I'm 76 and currently donating most of my Kitchen Stuff. My life has been episodic. Sometimes I've cooked a lot - for husband and friends. Sometimes, I've been alone and nomadic. A few years ago I was given the chance to 'settle down' in a small old house - and planted a wonderful garden and bought everything I'd ever had or wanted for my kitchen. Alas! The house needed way too much renovation and I left it. Currently in a 1-BR apartment surrounded by storage tubs of never-used Kitchen Stuff. Giving it away. Preparing to downsize to a Studio.
What's left is Bankers Boxes of Books, Opera Scores/Sheet Music, CDs and DVDs. Not sure whether I'll keep them.
Don't have many Clothes - never did - and really don't have anything else. Lived most of my adult life in a small Manhattan apartment, so never accumulated a lot.
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I remember a conversation with an Inlaw about the house that his son and daughter-in-law were living in. It had some interesting features and spaces and wasn’t furnished yet, except for a couch in the middle of it, that was pretty torn up because they let the dogs use it a lot. No judgment, it’s their house and their dogs. But since they love to watch sports, and they already had and eat in kitchen with room for a lot of people, I wondered out loud about how the dining room, which was a step up from the huge living room, could make an awesome and cozy spot for seating for watching sports, based on where their television was. And the middle of the living room could be the dog/kid playing area. Lots of room to run around and play, No obstructions.
The Inlaw tried to read me the riot act about how I didn’t know what a home was.
I remember telling him that the house is just a tool that we live in, and that a home was wherever Family is, pointing to my husband, who was the only family member of our nuclear family present at the time.
All of these years later I still feel the same. Home is where love is, ideally with family or friends that you have a lifelong affinity with, or even alone, for those of us who recharge with a lot of quiet, private time.
The house is the tool that should serve the people who dwell in it, to meet their unique needs in ways that suit them. Clearly, as we age, those of us who have various reasons for wanting a clean home will logically want less to clean. Perhaps fewer tripping hazards. For some it means a guest room or two for visitors that doesn’t require a bail out before people come over. It might mean a comfortable practical place for doing crafts. Other hobbies. It might mean creating a space that is ready to show and sell, while enjoying living in a space that looks like a model home. And all of these goals require either more or less stuff than the next person might need. And that’s OK!
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This is why I don’t like having people over to my home. I got stuff. I don’t want to be judged. Life is too short to be worried about what others think of us.
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This is a super video!!! I could never EVER become a minimalist; however, I do admire and respect anyone who wants to live a minimalist life style. Our possessions are a definite reflection of our personality and our heritage. Almost every item in my home has meaning-if only to myself. In my opinion, it is very easy for a person with a minimalist personality to become harshly judgmental of those of us who save everything-I have been known to make a candy bar wrapper a sentimental object-LOL. Those with the maximalist personality most always live in a very warm and inviting home-at least I’ve been told on numerous occasions that my home is very warm and inviting!!! While my daughter was growing up here, her friends always loved to congregate here and they loved to hear about my collections and appreciated the fact that my home has so much family history and special meaning. I pray every day that I will be blessed to live out my remaining days in this house and take my final breath in this place that is filled with everything that I love so much !!!!! 💝💝💝
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That’s really sweet. It doesn’t really sound like you’re a hoarder, but a collector of memories and family memorabilia and people are comfortable in your home, that’s the difference, most people would not be comfortable in a hoarder house. I on the other hand do not have a sentimental bone in my body. I have heard people say that they had sentimental clothes or shoes or some of the oddest things that I don’t see how they could be sentimental. I’ve also heard people say they thought objects had feelings so they couldn’t get rid of them because it would hurt their feelings . There’s gotta be a middle ground to all of this. I’ve been told my house looks like a model home or that it looks like no one lives here, that’s fine by me, I like it that way. My motto is “nothing on the floor except furniture legs”. Also, I have since added area rugs and trash cans to my motto. 😊 It’s very fast and easy to clean.
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Interesting how a cash gift is appreciated by some, but an insult to others. A used croquet set is a treasure to some and a burden to another. We can't control how others might interpret our desire to keep our lives simple, free from visual clutter and releasing us from the time burden of caring for our things when we'd rather be creating photographs, caring for a loved one. I think the key is to know yourself and to not judge others for being different. Now that I have less clutter and more time to pray, I can ask for some assistance in this. Also, knowing what other's "Love Language" is, can really help in knowing if you are actualy gifting or burdening with your thoughtfulness. Another fabulously insightful chat, Tim. Thank you for taking the time from caring for your stuff to caring for us. Time is a beautiful "Love Language"...for some😊
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I've not seen a video ever addressing this!
I am in a 30+ yo home, full of stuff.
When the ex left, he took what he wanted & started new, leaving me with the ugly furniture that is too expensive to remove & buy new.
Raised 2 little kids that grew up, good jobs, moved 1500 miles away & renting & I have all their photos & memories they may want?
They have great paying jobs & can be minimalists. They stay at dad's house when in town & are too busy to come "home" & help me make decisions.
Now that I have time for my own hobbies, I don't want to declutter the hidden areas & even though, I'm in therapy, there are so many triggers. The thought of heading down to the "organized stash" & knowing I'll probably feel sad, angry, bitter, etc, means that if I let someone in, I'll get judged as "lazy", etc.
Vicious cycle... I'd rather be outside biking & playing pickleball with friends than in my dungeon, with reminders....
I can relate. I did this, having 5 grown kids. I made 5 boxes bought at the dollar store. I went through the mementos, separated them by each of them and gave them their boxes. They can do as they please. Keep, or not. This act helped me immensely!
@@katethielmann4244 thanks for the idea. Since pandemic started, they are only in town for holidays. One year, I did pack a suitcase & a couple Rubbermaid totes with prom dresses, fancy shoes, etc & their big "sports sweatshirts" with their names on it & stuff & sent it "back to dads".
I don't want to be a bother about it all but maybe I can do better with separating & letting go.
I agree. There lots of emotions attached to objects. That's why its so difficult to declutter. Playing with hobbies is more funl
Maybe finding a balance with both could be achieved. A little play, a little decluttering. I also know that if the kids aren't coming around to help, then they don't want the stuff. Most grown kids don't care about our 'stuff' or theirs for that matter.
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I had to pack everything up because it was hurting looking at it, but I did not get rid of it. All my documents, photos, cherished items are in a closet waiting for a later date, maybe a book one day, who knows. I am not a minimalist, but it felt great to clear my home of unneeded clutter. My home now only has things out that I love to look at and clean. Things I use. I am creative, so I have two rooms set aside to be my art rooms. To be messy. My home used to be cluttered with memories that triggered me and took me spiraling to my past. Today, my home is my sanctuary. I am creating it to be exactly what I want. I love my home today. It makes me smile walking in the front door. I wish everyone felt that way. Peaceful and safe. Hugs. 🥰
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So glad you understand why some of us would never wear the minimalist label. Mind you, the clutter I've turned out is not my own, but left by others who have been given refuge over the years and moved on leaving belongings behind. On the subject of gifts, we suggested some years ago that we would no longer exchange unwanted stuff and everyone was so relieved. Not many if us left now, but instead we donate to whatever charity concerns us. When I was young we always bore gifts when visiting, things like a jar of jam or flowers from the garden, homemade cookies. We no longer buy supermarket cards either, instead an occasional letter, and last week I received a beautifully written one, especially for me❤
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So many good points in this video. I am puzzled by minimalists who are proud at being able to count the number of things they own. That’s my definition of poverty!
I just found your channel and so this is the first of your videos that I have watched. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I love your calm, balanced, and nuanced approach to the question of what we might need or not need as we move into retirement. I am entering that phase of my life in the next month, after 57 years of either studying or working. My biggest issue is the quantity of books in my house. I have been decluttering quite a lot but have reached the point where I am very grateful for the vast amount of books that still remain because these are going to be incredibly important to me in this new phase of my life. I do not like reading on a Kindle and I’m not much of a fan of audiobooks, and for me a hardcopy is just such a delicious experience. So, I am treasuring my bulging bookcases. You sound like a very thoughtful person and one of my retirement projects will be to work through your backlist of videos. You have a new subscriber from Melbourne, Australia.
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Gifts are not for me. but receiver..good point. I tell my girls, I don't need anything, but I can't stop them. But they have dialed back on gifts and give flowers. I prefer they don't spend 6.00 on cards...in fact that drive me crazy. I tell them to save their money. I have started to minimalism my you tube watching also. Stopped watching videos that are wasting my time. Of course I still watch your you tube as it has value. Joan
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Such good advice because I often these Minimalist videos make me feel unsuccessful as I do not want to get rid of all my things. They want to live that way doesn't mean I will do well at it. so I have quit watching 98% of them. and have gone back to enjoying other types of living portrayed on here, a lovely home with memories is what I want. Thank you so much for broaching this subject. Happy Father's Day , Blessings to you and yours.
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Very well said! I grew up with one parent who kept everything (not really hoarding style, but kept everything) and another parent who liked to get rid of any unnecessary items. We are currently having to deal with an entire life's worth of items at my parents' homestead. It is such a burden and a stress on all of us. Because of this, I am ready to completely clean out my home of anything extra. I do not want to put my kids through this. I just graduated my last kiddo from high school and now I feel I can finally let go of many things I've been hanging on to. I'm ready for my next chapter! With less stuff!!! Thank you for your balanced look at minimalism!!
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Two expressions grabbed me. The first was "the cane in the corner". So evocative! The breadth and depth of many lives are tucked into five little words. It is beautifully sad and sadly beautiful. The second expression was in the line "There is a middle ground of minimalism." Middle ground minimalism--that sounds powerful and healthy! Extremes are easy to begin to pursue, but the determination to hold the middle ground requires a lot of individuality and strength.
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I remember seeing a video talking about the ornate designs and extra flair in traditional architecture and common objects in cities such as railings and poles. We removed these embellishments and replaced them with cookie cutter minimalist designs. They said, "if art is an expression of ourselves, then what do these designs say about us"? Art, certain objects, and architecture ground us and remind us of who we are as a culture, family, person, etc.
another collective extreme...
Tim, this is one of the most genuine and thought provoking videos on the subject of being a minimalist that I've ever listened to. You made some wonderful and thoughtful statements that resonated with me. I've been trying to declutter for some time and continuosly 'put it off' (a.k.a. procrastinate 😅). I do want to pare down my belongings but I have no desire to become a true minimalist which is I'm sure very satisfying to many people but it's not a goal for me.. However, hearing your wise thoughts and comments may have very well inspired me to get to my 'paring down', rather than thinking that I have to do a full sweep of things. Your delivery of all of your videos is done with quiet consideration and I applaud you, 🎉
Thank you! You’ve got this. :)
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Mixed family here. Some zealous minimalists, some organised and adhering to the William Morrris adage of only have I your home that which is useful or beautiful, some with a bit of additional stuff in the attic and one old absolute and horrific hoarder. We now only give food gifts to each other. It works for us all.
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I agree there's a dark side to minimalism, and you've made some great points. The choice to live a life of minimalism is fine as long as it's not treated like a religion and a person doesn't employ tactics to "evangelize" and impose guilt upon others who choose not to live that way. It feels as though that's what's happening in our society! I love being surrounded by beauty and things that matter to me. Creating my home and what's in it gives me my personal identity. It gives allowance for memories to live there. I live within my space to please myself and how it makes me feel. I make sure I have enough for guests to be welcomed in my home. When I observe the extreme of an empty, colorless, boring, sterile home, I can't help but wonder if the person who lives there has an empty heart, too. I wonder why they won't allow themselves to be attached to anything....
It is a spectrum. You have hoarders on one end and empty room people on the other. Most of us fall somewhere in between. As for me, I declutter because I need the room and if I don't use or like it, then it goes. They say we spend the first 40 years of our lives buying stuff and the last 40 getting rid of most of it (i.e. Swedish Death Cleaning). I'm in my 7th decade of life and it makes sense for a multitude of reasons. The time is now while I'm still strong enough and in relatively good health. Been my experience that either you make the decision or the decision will be made for you.
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The spectrum part is so important to address. It seems like people get caught up in the label, then criticize others when their idea of minimalism isnt what a person is doing. There is no one size fits all for the minimalism lifestyle.
Just a thought, giving a gift that is not a gift but has to be passed on, is not a gift. It's passing on what you want.
A gift is one of appreciation. There is a big misconception that a gift should be appreciated and valued. What you like, the recipient may not.
As for minimalism, that's a personal choice. I left a minimalist FB group when parents started throwing out their children's things without the child's or teen's knowledge. It has gone too far.
Throwing out one's things that one loves, is throwing out one's self. Your identity is tossed in the landfill and no longer has joy to the one pressured to throw things out.
Good video. 🎉
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again common sense wisdom compassion empathy kindness patience understanding forgiveness of self and humanity....keep preaching teaching sharing...you rock...
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I’m into the frugal lifestyle as a result of the vagaries of life. I am not Minimaliist. And a bit t past the age of Fire. I find the personal finance investing and planning lifestyle a challenge. But all these same issues have been brought up in the discussions of all these related groups for years. Literalists, those w fewer resources, and just plain contrary people enter into the discussions. You do you. Others have to live with their own circumstances you cannot be responsible for everyone’s emotional issues. Thank you for your thoughtful channel.
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Tim is an excellent speaker. I contract with mental health speakers for conferences and seminar development. He's more on-point than many PhD psychologists! I loved this. ❤
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I am about to reduce again. The last five yrs have been a huge challenge. Selling mom’s house, the farm with lodge, my stored stuff and my last house in the US.
I am about to leave for a few years, so down sizing again!
In five years I have accumulated so much from the three homes I tried to sell out!!!
lol
Memories……..going make more memories!
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I can't stand to look at a hoarder's home. I don't ever want to go into one. I realize some may have a mental problem but some are just lazy and won't organize or clean.
@@shoebill181 ok
@@shoebill181 Shoebill, I bow to your opinion (heehee!) I was just thinking- a person could be too elderly or otherwise not able.
I enjoy my stuff and I never know when an idea will take root for something and I’ll wish I had that item. I figure if none of our kids want our stuff then give it away or throw it away. I’ll be beyond caring at that point so it won’t matter. At the cost to replace any of it at todays prices I think I’ll just hang on to what I’ve got Thankyou. That’s my little joys in life.
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I'm 58 and I worked hard to buy lovely (but not expensive) items for my house, wardrobe, art materials, etc. I am tempted to declutter when I'm older, especially books, not-very-good photos (I print them all!) because I forget what I have or I don't have time to look at it, use it, enjoy it, wear it, etc. However I want to be careful and intentional about this as I would not be able to buy these items again, some are irreplaceable, others would cost too much or would be difficult to find. So I will proceed with care. I like to live simply, I would not say I am a minimalist but less can definitely be more. Minimalism can be a little clinical. I don't like hoarding things but I like to be comfortable since I have the space, and I like to have around me the things I like. I do think I would like to move abroad one day and the stuff I have stops me doing it because I don't want to downsize my accommodation or leave my possessions behind. As I get older I will hopefully have the chance to review what to keep and what to get rid of, I would hate anyone who inherits to just give up and put everything in the rubbish, I need to separate the good from the dispensable and maybe make others happy in the process by giving some things away. I started yesterday with some items of clothing.
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This video is so important. I have read FB posts about people struggling with trying to declutter things that they want to keep and feeling guilty because they don't get rid of some things. Many people really struggle to do it perfectly, which we all know perfection isn't attainable. I was glad to hear what you had to say and I hope more people listen to it.
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Minimalism is not about deprivation or Isolation.
It's about decluttering and being mindful of purchases.
It's frees us from irrational wasteful spending.
Thus increasing available Cash.
A Win Win in my book.
Americans have a tendency to take things to far ..as a Swede bought up with the nordic famous "minimalism" lifestyle some things i see in the Us vlogs are just plain weird.
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It's nice to see old timers getting into minimalism and making minimalism videos! Most of the minimalism videos I have seen are by young hipsters.
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I agree. As we age we need less. Fulfillment in life is not about stuff. It’s spending time with family and friends that give the most joy.
It's only if someone feels superior or inferior for what they have chosen to do. As a maximalist, I love all my beautiful pieces, and they bring me unending joy. But the key is are you attached, could you sell it or give it away, do you worry about it? I am constantly rotating things and enjoy that experience. I'm have an Etsy shop so it's fun to see it go off and be enjoyed by someone new. Bottom line, in my opinion: things shouldn't control you.
Your video was so on point and although in my home I do not like “ clutter “ I love going into my neighbours home and seeing all her treasures and photographs that adorn her home on every surface as they demonstrate a life fulfilled and loved. The biggest and most significant point for me however was your comment that gifts you give are not for you but the receiver. I am not religious but have two sisters that are, when my wonderful husband died two years ago my evangelical sister gave me a book of religious, biblical texts that upset me as I thought this fitted her own agenda but demonstrated no empathy for me. I know this digresses slightly from the aim of your video but your words in that sentence struck such a strong chord within me . Thank you for sharing your insight and wisdom, kind regards June in the UK. Ps, books are one of my passions and I love seeing them in my home and keeping them close to me x
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In regard to your sister's gift to you, you don't have to keep it. Within a year of being widowed, I had to get rid of all of the sympathy cards because they caused an emotional hook even when I put them into a cupboard. Also, I redid our massive garden to make it easier to tend. I bought 10 large wooden planters. Then, my husband's sister brought plants for each one. Groan. Only one plant was on my list. It messed up my 'seasonal' flowering ideas. She kept checking them. I was stuck with this until I downsized 5 years later. Take care. Great care. @kzZnAT0r
In Denmark they have what they call hygge ( pronounced whu-ga). They consider it as cozyness but they have a form of minimalism. They don't get rid of everything. Also when decorate ring I have a black plastic bag, a donation box and a time will tell box which I learned from the Minimal Mom. Unlike her I will not be getting rid of 85% of my stuff. But if you haven't reached for something specific in your Time Will Tell box in a year (except in my case not sentimental things which go in bins) then its safe to let it go. I know that was kind of long winded. Sorry. Thanks for us remix minimalist not feel so bad.😁
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Thank you! I have been trying to find content about the drawbacks and regrets of minimalism, but all I find are videos that essentially all say "watch this video about what I regret about minimalism.... Nothing! It's 💯 great".
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I enjoyed listening to your thoughts on minimalism. I have been an avid declutterer for decades and helped a number of others to declutter their homes. I believe that you should have the amount of stuff that suits you. If removing all your furniture and sleeping on yoga mats on the floor suits you, do that. I value people over stuff and that can mean that my family has a range in levels of stuff at different times. We should each be able to have our needs met even when they differ. My daughter loves books and will continue to add bookshelves to accommodate her growing library. I love knitting, but not yarn that is old, musty or dusty so I keep a small, working stash that fits on one shelf. We are both happy with our level of stuff, it suits our needs and stages of life.
You nailed this one!!!
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To comfort a bereaved dog owner, I gave her as a gift a certificate to say I had sponsored a rescued pet. She did not look at all happy. I realise it was a gift for me, but even so it still came as a surprise how uncharitable and unsympathetic she showed herself to be towards rescue animals. It's disappointing your children did not make use of your gifts to benefit others.
I think that gift was such a sweet idea❤
A very thoughtful gift indeed. 😊
So happy your video showed up in my feed. I agree wholeheartedly with each point you presented. Some of the minimalists I've seen on YT live in stark and cold looking homes. There's no sense of personality. I've been purging things I no longer need, use or enjoy for a year and it feels great to not be a slave caring for them. I agree, though, it does feel a bit elitist if I am being honest. Best to not talk about it much! Thanks for your frank, informative talk.
A “personal journey”. YES! Hopefully, the journey continues to move forward! Love it!
I'm a minimalist traveling full-time in an RV, and I’ve explained to family and friends that gifts cause me to remove something from my RV. I give throughout the year, instead of during the holiday season, and acknowledge birthdays and other holidays with phone calls or visits. I've learned not to be guided by the commercialism of designated holidays and enjoy family and friends throughout my life with face time phone calls, in-person visits
And I’m jealous of your RV life! 😍 And now you have a new subscriber!!
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I embrace the dark side of organized chaos! I’m the ‘queen of my house’, if something is ‘not in favor’ I get rid of it! Thats my method. Does that count?
Spare the dog please😮
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@@jennywren8937 I meant that as a jest/joke. I would never hurt a dog…I actually spoil the dog.
@@diangallo 😄♥️
I absolutely love this video. All of your points are so spot on. The idea of minimalism for me was just not spending every waking moment cleaning but the two didn't go together because I will clean but there were always areas with visual clutter. Once I realized what caused me anxiety and dealt with those areas I felt so much more at peace in my space.
Love your take on this. I’m a 70 year old creator on the Tubes who’s lived a simpler life for 50 years. I’m a father and grandfather who really gets your take on generational relationships. I love my kids, they love me. I can buy them any gift… they get so frustrated when I can’t think what I wanted for my recent 70th.
Your take varies a little from mine…. And that’s what I love. We’re all individuals.
Thanks! Just subscribed to your channel!
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Things don't create stress, people create stress
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"When I saw a child drinking from his hands I threw away my cup"
-Master Minimalist
please do not try this with coffee
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I am definitely keeping my cup. ☕️
Love the nuanced discussion about the cons, especially how minimalism can be a privilege and might not suit everyone. Subscribed because it's nice to see a real person talking about it in such a respectful informative way.
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I am a minimalist. Rather than rehoming my bits and bobs, I have decided to use what I have until it's trash worthy. It's not about passing stuff on. It's about stopping the behavior.
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What I give as gifts …. Cash
Always appreciated.
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Great video! ❤ My husband and I were minimalist long before covid started, and we had friends over pretty frequently. I bought extra dishes and utensils at the thrift store and donated them back when our get- together were over. Or we bought compostable utensils and plates for less formal gatherings. Nobody judged us for being minimalist, and several of our friends are borderline "hoarders." We never judge them either. But minimalism changed our lives in so many positive ways, we're never going back to how we lived before. In 2023, I wore the same dress every day for the entire year. 😂 just to see if it was doable. I didn't start getting bored until around October 😅 I want to do it again maybe try going 18 months next time and sew a different dress. I donated the dress I wore for the year. you don't have to go full bore minimalism but I suggest clearing out spaces and leaving them empty. Negative space must have health benefits because we feel so much calmer and happier in our [half empty] house.
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You are absolutely right! All good points and well thought out. We all have a different journey and minimalism isn’t for everyone. Thanks and have a good day😊.
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Wow! I'm now well-informed about the dark side of minimalism. Thank you so much for discussing this topic with honesty and sincerity.
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Very wise words and quite a few hit home. Gives me a new perspective on my perfectionism Yesterday I was looking at my books and wanted to declutter, but then I thought better of it. These books are a part of my history and fit perfectly. I‘ll leave them where they are. I found out about the mental aspect in a hard way already. I threw away a broken toy and one of my adult children was so sad about that… Decluttering has been good for my mental health though, the house is more peaceful. I have never replaced things with „required“ minimalist objects. That would‘ve been a waste of money. I‘m definitely guilty of eying other people‘s cluttered homes, especially when I see how it affects their mental and family life and I have to restrain myself from re-organizing. Sorry for the long-winded response, but it helped me to organize my thoughts. New sub!
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That was a very interesting and insightful video. I know a number of people who have struggled to "declutter" their lives - as have I- and I will be forwarding this vid to a good friend. You're right - it CAN be overwhelming. Where to start? So many decisions to make and family to consult. I don't really think that I want to fully embrace minimalism. My goal is to let go of the things up in cupboards that I haven't used in years (but I MIGHT need that some day - hahaha!) and reduce my belongings to the point where they don't bother me with the space they take up, physically and emotionally. It seems to be a much longer and more complicated process than I initially anticipated!! Your comments were helpful.
Erica Lucas coin the phrase "Minimalish" on her UA-cam channel. I like that word and find it a happy medium because I am keeping what I love and truly use and I am finding it easier to let go of things because I am using this as my guide.
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Yep. I always say I’m a middlist
That popped up in a timely manner. I’m in the middle of the Swedish Death Purge in my home of 43 years. (I’m fine, that’s just the name of the purge.) There have been two rebuilds due to natural disasters, but it’s amazing how many family heirlooms survived. It’s also amazing how much has come into the house since the disasters that I don’t want anymore. I wonder if the kindness and help from so many people during those events has made me feel guilty about passing along those newer things I don’t really want.
I’ve slowed in my purge, but there are still a lot of books and paperwork to bag and bin.
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So glad this video popped up on my feed. I enjoyed your humor, your thoughtful articulation of the issue, and the high quality of your production. Bravo!
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