Fiery Debate: Should We Encourage Women To Have Kids Younger? | Good Morning Britain

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  • Опубліковано 11 кві 2023
  • After Hilary Swank gave birth to twins at 48, journalist Lucy Cavendish has called on women to stop having babies in their 40s.
    Is it time for women to consider having kids younger?
    Lucy Baker and Esther Falana share their differing opinions.
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    Broadcast on 12/04/23
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 151

  • @emishi2012
    @emishi2012 Рік тому +46

    I have a huge amount of respect to this channel for keeping their comments open!

  • @jon9257
    @jon9257 Рік тому +27

    My mam had me in her teens, my brother in her 20’s and my sister in her 30’s, not to judge her but she was a much better mother to my sister than to me and my brother. She had more patience, more money because she had got a career, better living conditions because she could afford to buy her house. Me and my brother spent a lot more time with grandparents than my sister did. She was just overall a better mother when she got older

  • @teej70
    @teej70 Рік тому +36

    What were you doing at 21 Esther???....😂 - Nunu

  • @ZK_SHREDR
    @ZK_SHREDR Рік тому +31

    All of this comes down to wealth lol,your age is basically pointless to this debate. A financially comfortable 40 year old will raise a child easier than the uncomfortable 22year old. Basically common sense

    • @SuperSouthchick
      @SuperSouthchick Рік тому +5

      however energy and fertility wise younger can be better

    • @ZK_SHREDR
      @ZK_SHREDR Рік тому +10

      @@SuperSouthchick no point having energy if you can't afford to take a day off work tho

    • @SuperSouthchick
      @SuperSouthchick Рік тому +2

      @@ZK_SHREDR many older parents also find childcare costs expensive. I think there are advantages and disadvantages in both. Being a parent I assume is hard for both ages. Having children under 35 seems to have more benefits though.

    • @pepy7779
      @pepy7779 Рік тому +2

      Well said. My take as a woman who had twins at 40 - raising kids is not "skilled" work. It's not rocket science. Your brain is at its peak while in your 20s and 30s. So maximize what you do with it. Make an impact. When you're older, and past your peak, have kids. They will keep you young for longer and make you connected to the younger gen when you are older. You have money for childcare so you spend less time doing grunt work caring for them. You can continue with your career etc while spending quality time with your kids and showing them by example how much one can achieve in life.

    • @ZK_SHREDR
      @ZK_SHREDR Рік тому +3

      @@pepy7779 agreed, having slightly older parents has made me mature alot quicker as they've taught me things that my school definitely didn't plan to. I've learnt about the importance of saving and I was given work experience from quite a young age. Obviously there are negatives too such as their parenting could be called a bit "old fashioned" but the positives definitely outweigh the negatives. Just hearing stories of how they grew up and how their parents would treat them,I find really interesting.i feel privileged to have older parents as I've definitely learnt a lot more than I would if they were younger/less experienced

  • @FUT-Franklin
    @FUT-Franklin Рік тому +9

    People are not having kids anymore we get it, blame the government and justice secretaries for making society such a place you wouldn't dare want to bring a child into. You cant leave your doors unlocked in this day and age nevermind have children

  • @awokenworld2388
    @awokenworld2388 Рік тому +14

    Had my son and daughter very early 20s and then 14 years later at 36 I had my final son !! And the best pregnancy …. 36 years old !!!

    • @samo6083
      @samo6083 Рік тому

      this isn't a debate, you and the baby are more likely to die when your past 35 and with each year after that number increases even more.
      Even if the baby survives they are more likely to have disabilitys and just so many other complications.
      Finally menopause is a very real thing and often starts during the late 30s making conception impossible and even if you're fertile with age it makes it harder to do.
      These are all facts btw nothing to debate about

  • @hd-xc2lz
    @hd-xc2lz 6 місяців тому +2

    People are kidding themselves if they believe the amount of energy one possesses has nothing to do with age.

  • @RTG1031
    @RTG1031 Рік тому +18

    Bit ignorant to say that everyone 40+ will need the help of IVF to become pregnant.

    • @leelobee6552
      @leelobee6552 Рік тому +6

      not really stats say otherwise and you also kore likely to have a child with a disability

    • @teoleno4019
      @teoleno4019 Рік тому +3

      My mom pushed out a kid at 48.

    • @leelobee6552
      @leelobee6552 Рік тому +1

      @@teoleno4019 good lord I think that's quite selfish

    • @HA-qt8vo
      @HA-qt8vo Рік тому

      ​@@leelobee6552 whats ur cut off for ppl to have kids?

    • @leelobee6552
      @leelobee6552 Рік тому

      @@HA-qt8vo 40 at a push and that's generous

  • @el7h3773
    @el7h3773 Рік тому +6

    Its down to person preference but pretending a woman in her 40's is going to have the same level of energy as a woman in her 20's is abit silly and there are health risks.

    • @pepy7779
      @pepy7779 Рік тому +1

      Correct. I gave birth for the first time at 40. While some of my highschool friends had theirs in their early 20s. I have an advanced degree and a career in tech. They are either housewives or elementary school teachers. While they bring energy to parenting, i bring high standards and am an example of how a woman can (and should) achieve big things in life. There's always pros and cons to both sides. I don't think this topic should even be debated!

  • @CR-ce5lf
    @CR-ce5lf Рік тому +4

    Absolutely NOT! Have children when you’re able to.

  • @jAdliel
    @jAdliel Рік тому +5

    I had my 1st at 24 and second at 29. I had always "planned" to have children after my 30s . You can't always plan , life is not always by the book. We all want things at different times. The only thing I've noticed now with my friends having children in their 30s is fertility problems , miscarriages, and yes this can happen at any age, but I've noticed it more now in my 30s with friends and family. Each to their own , we all have a different journey. ❤

  • @Ash-vk4mz
    @Ash-vk4mz Рік тому +5

    It comes down to mindset not age

  • @salviaofficinalis02
    @salviaofficinalis02 Рік тому +4

    30 - unmarried - no kids. dating. 5 alcohol units. 0 shags. Fabulous & absolutely no judgement from society. (only mum & Una and the whole of turkey curry buffet)
    All hail to the genius of Helen Fielding. Hip hip! Hooray!

  • @samoke4527
    @samoke4527 Рік тому +15

    age 30-50 are your peak years as long as you keep fit and healthy. For me just have children when you are ready mentally, physically and financially and try to stay young no matter what your age is.

    • @samo6083
      @samo6083 Рік тому

      this isn't a debate, you and the baby are more likely to die when your past 35 and with each year after that number increases even more.
      Even if the baby survives they are more likely to have disabilitys and just so many other complications.
      Finally menopause is a very real thing and often starts during the late 30s making conception impossible and even if you're fertile with age it makes it harder to do.
      These are all facts btw nothing to debate about

    • @Evaselfmade
      @Evaselfmade Рік тому

      Exactly! People should do what works best for them

  • @streetkeekstv
    @streetkeekstv Рік тому +5

    Great topic & debate both ladies raised valid points & concerns which are both understood. Statistically for women at a older age having children is a risk but it isn’t always that easy for all women to have children at young ages. It is also a fact many try to conceive in their prime and it doesn’t happen. If you want a child and god says so then it is your time until then don’t pressure yourselves with age but be vigilant and prepared. If you want to have children get your mind,body and soul right so when the time comes you are healthy,financially stable and within the right mindset.

  • @colettegibson6516
    @colettegibson6516 Рік тому +21

    As a child of older parents and having mine at 35; I 100% say have them while you're young!

    • @colettegibson6516
      @colettegibson6516 Рік тому +1

      @pepy777 both my da's parents died before I was born and I lost both my other grandparents by the age of 7, so missed out there and throughout my life I've made friends with much older people to fill that gap, I'm the youngest of 4 but felt like an only child and disconnected with 2 of my 3 brothers due to the age gap, I lost my da at 21 which devastated me as there was still so much to learn from and do with him. Massive generational gap and regularly people thought my eldest brother was my father and parents my grandparents-embarrassing for all especially my brother and mother and mami developed health problems in her late 50's so had little energy to play etc so I spent a lot of time alone if not with mates/at school.
      Not all bad though, I have benefitted emotionally and mentally from being around adults predominantly in my school work and they were (are) loving kind and beautiful people but I regularly wish I was born 10-15 years earlier.
      And being older didn't mean more financially stable; they were but then recession hit in the 90's and we lost almost everything so they had to struggle with a young child and 1 in university.
      Hope that clarifies things

    • @colettegibson6516
      @colettegibson6516 Рік тому +1

      @pepy777 actually I had a fantastic childhood full of love, freedom (grew up in west Wales) and although working class never went without. It was tinged with sadness missing my older brothers (one in particular) and lonely at times but it taught me to use my imagination and be self sufficient and appreciate the time I spent with family.
      Nobody's childhood is perfect and to be fair, I was a total surprise to my parents at nearly 42 and 43 years old

    • @colettegibson6516
      @colettegibson6516 Рік тому +1

      @pepy777 don't be too hard on yourself as long as they are loved and have all they need emotionally and physically I'm sure they'll be fine. I'm am older mum (had my daughter at 35) and would have liked another but at 40 it's too late for me

    • @colettegibson6516
      @colettegibson6516 Рік тому

      @pepy777 I don't recall mami going through it but it depends how greatly it affects you, I guess. I know she went grey not long after having me lol.
      And I concur with your 'other parents' comment. I'm friendly with a single dad and a couple in their 40's but most of the other parents are in their 20's.
      May I also add, I was top of my class in primary school and so is my daughter then I was in top setts in secondary school and I'm certain that comes from having intelligent and also mature parent(s)

    • @hd-xc2lz
      @hd-xc2lz 6 місяців тому +1

      The topic of your excellent comment(s) should have been raised in the video above. How one relates to one's grandparents matters, and differs dramatically if they are in their 50s vs 70s. Also, amongst friends and colleagues who waited until late 30s or older to have a child, raising a singular child is far more common than multiple children.

  • @keiyamcmorris9271
    @keiyamcmorris9271 Рік тому +4

    There are benefits from having children young or older. But we need to get rid of the mindset that older women can't have babies because a women can be fertile right up in 50s

  • @steph6109
    @steph6109 Рік тому +4

    Many women would have children younger if they could have the financial security and find a decent man.

  • @kezi41
    @kezi41 Рік тому +5

    It hard to have kids early as people don’t want commitments. Or people can’t afford to until they are in a better place financially. The dating scene is hard enough these days. Some of us would like kids earlier but just haven’t met the right person yet to share there life with

  • @balance3201
    @balance3201 Рік тому +11

    "Influencer" Ok bye

    • @ZK_SHREDR
      @ZK_SHREDR Рік тому +2

      😂😂😂exactly,who tf cares about there view

  • @stephanierichards4318
    @stephanierichards4318 Рік тому +4

    I wish I had my daughter in my teens to be honest. If I did she would have been grown up now and I would be free now lol.

  • @reginaldamoah8608
    @reginaldamoah8608 Рік тому +4

    People basically are forced to have kids later. you've got to be lucky to be able to afford a good size family house before your 30s. And then to be in a location close to your family for support but that works for both of your careers as well and not forgetting good schools as well.

  • @aa-fw2pw
    @aa-fw2pw Рік тому +13

    I had my girls at 31 and 33(had fertility issues). I wish I was younger when I had them so that when they are grown up, I'll still be able to do lots with them. My mother had me in her 30s and by the time I was grown up, she had a terminal illness and passed away before she could meet my children

    • @carolynclare3985
      @carolynclare3985 Рік тому +10

      Thats really sad, I'm so sorry about your mum. But you can get ill at any age.

    • @aa-fw2pw
      @aa-fw2pw Рік тому +2

      @@carolynclare3985 that is very true. I think it's just my own personal wish to have had children earlier. I wouldn't push my opinion onto others

    • @lcfcsince2016
      @lcfcsince2016 Рік тому +1

      @@aa-fw2pw I respect your opinion, yes of course people should be able to choose

    • @makenamucai104
      @makenamucai104 Рік тому +1

      So sorry to hear about your loss❤
      Hope you and your children are doing well x

    • @mabinty
      @mabinty Рік тому

      My mum had me at that age, and we have plenty time with her my grandfather also had her at that age and is still living. Clearly you just have bad genetics, because early 30s is a good age to have kids and not when fertility problems start

  • @ruthhadfield9726
    @ruthhadfield9726 Рік тому +3

    I had my first at 26 and my second at 30....I have to admit....I did all the partying and living my life and independence once I had my children...also once my boys get older and get their independence I will be young enough to enjoy it...but I don't judge anyone who makes the choices that best for them

  • @pepy7779
    @pepy7779 Рік тому +6

    I had my twins at 40. Motherhood has not been all rosy for me only because of the continuous judgement I get from other women over my age.

  • @jaughnekow
    @jaughnekow Рік тому +1

    If you're very financially stable, there's nothing wrong with having children. Age does have an effect but it isn't much.
    If you're rich, having a family becomes easier.

  • @angelaharris6577
    @angelaharris6577 Рік тому +2

    No ones business when you decide to have children. It's personal to each couple.
    You have to factor in so many things, like ....🤔 can you afford to have children, or are you going to take taxpayers' money to fund your lifestyle so you don't have to work.🎤

  • @cgmat7804
    @cgmat7804 Рік тому

    We had our kids older, 30+ and can advise it is not the energy level when they are young, its the fact that they are now teenagers and we are done, spent, knackered!!!

  • @Murph_82
    @Murph_82 Рік тому +9

    She lost me at tik tok... sums up society 😫

  • @cate5744
    @cate5744 10 місяців тому

    My parents were 36/37 when my elder sister was born and 41/42 with me. No issues. They tried IVF in their 20s to no result.
    Now at 27 I have no qualms about my parents decision, obv for I wouldn’t be here otherwise 😅
    I’ve read that some consider how much time older parents will get with their children and visa-versa. Time is NEVER guaranteed.

  • @Darkangel-hy8ev
    @Darkangel-hy8ev Рік тому +3

    Who cares lol i am adopted, but they are my Mum and Dad, wouldn't think of it any other way, best parents ever!
    Had me at 40, my mum is soon to be 93, she has never took a tablet in her life, doesn't have the flu jab, wouldn't have the covid vaccine, hasn't been to a doctors in years, and was still riding a bike up until she was 86, just has a dodgy knee now, and that is it!
    My gran lived to just before her 102nd birthday, so obviously some great genes going on lol
    Shame their not mine lol

  • @shobnagooding4973
    @shobnagooding4973 10 місяців тому +1

    Does anyone think about the child? They might not want an older parent

  • @yasminogbu8929
    @yasminogbu8929 14 днів тому

    Fact is very few 21 year olds are not on benefits raising kids. 10% of those girls are probably married 90% won’t be & had the baby out of a relationship or marriage just a one night stand. Very hard to get your money up too too

  • @lilyann168
    @lilyann168 Рік тому +1

    Congrats to the 47 year old she looks fantastic.

  • @FormulaProg
    @FormulaProg 3 місяці тому

    Yes.

  • @humairaali2426
    @humairaali2426 Рік тому

    Yes

  • @agneskrzy803
    @agneskrzy803 Рік тому

    Who will pay for it ?

  • @nathaliegrieves3859
    @nathaliegrieves3859 10 місяців тому

    The most important thing you should give a child. Is love. I don't think age matters really.

  • @lucindanonhebel5329
    @lucindanonhebel5329 Рік тому

    I think it's a money issue. Parents who need to build a career first and save for a mortgage have to delay parenthood.

  • @ChaoticBluez
    @ChaoticBluez Рік тому

    Some people some how think that all women have kids later chose it, like life is simple, it’s easy to find the one and have children when you want to, but that’s not how it is for some women. It’s almost like people expect you to have children in unideal circumstances just not to have children later. I just think it’s not that simple. Personally if I could choose I would have had kids mid 30s, but that’s my own personal subjective circumstance.

  • @stephanierichards4318
    @stephanierichards4318 Рік тому +1

    Her skin is great for 47! Wow

  • @hearmeoutbro
    @hearmeoutbro 9 місяців тому

    Definitely not.

  • @drkarenbukharibukhari9931
    @drkarenbukharibukhari9931 Рік тому +1

    thanks for complimenting me publicly i am best foster mom of my sister son after divorce i raised fareed as my son

  • @korneliai9300
    @korneliai9300 Рік тому

    She looks so young for 47! Wow

  • @v_jolieeej7428
    @v_jolieeej7428 11 місяців тому

    End of the day, no one shouldnt be telling a woman when to have THEIR offspring. From when x, y, z isnt financing the child etc Nor occupying THEIR womb simply mind your own and worry about your circumstance. It can be said when you are a bit older you are more patient and financially stronger compared to teens and 20s when you may not be mentally mature. Additionally some women may not want kids early or at all and life happens when they may end up changing their mind when they meet the right person FOR THEM.

  • @asherbrown7637
    @asherbrown7637 Рік тому

    No

  • @justinenaluuma4245
    @justinenaluuma4245 Рік тому

    Apart from the infertility issues the rest of the risks also happen younger mothers.

  • @davidhowington5449
    @davidhowington5449 Рік тому

    I wonder if any Americans and brits have debated the definition of football. I know football in Britian is soccer. Just confusing when she said her daughter played football lol.

    • @Darkangel-hy8ev
      @Darkangel-hy8ev Рік тому

      This is a Uk channel, and pretty simple, you use your feet to kick a ball around, obviously should be bloody football lol
      Same as toilets, Americans say restrooms, you don't really go for a relaxing rest/break do you lol
      Americans are weird lol

    • @HollyMarie98
      @HollyMarie98 Рік тому

      In Britain we call it football, not soccer

    • @davidhowington5449
      @davidhowington5449 Рік тому

      @Holly Marie yea I know. Do you know why? Just wonder why we call it different sports. I like soccer. Just think it's interesting how we came up with a new sport to call football instead of calling soccer football and football soccer lol.

    • @HollyMarie98
      @HollyMarie98 Рік тому

      @@davidhowington5449 yes, apparently the word soccer originated in Britain, Brits then stopped using it, but Americans stuck with it. I like how yous came up with a new sport too.

  • @DaeWolfe_85
    @DaeWolfe_85 Рік тому +7

    She wanna be her daughter friend instead of being her parent. This is what happens when kids make kids, no wisdom being passed down.

  • @teoleno4019
    @teoleno4019 Рік тому +2

    It's better to not have kids at all.

    • @sjanex
      @sjanex Рік тому

      But that’s not what the debate is, is it? 🙄

    • @teoleno4019
      @teoleno4019 Рік тому

      @@sjanex It is. Society has fooled woman into thinking their lifes are not complete without kids, when in reality the most happiest woman out there do not have or want kids.

    • @sjanex
      @sjanex Рік тому

      @@teoleno4019 I had children because I wanted to! I never felt pressured by anyone 😂 and it’s rather insulting that you think that. Believe it or not, i actually enjoy being a mum (I’m sure you’ll now tell me I’m lying like most child free people do as they can’t fathom it!) but anyway like I said, that is not what these women are debating. They are talking about age, not being childfree. Let people live their life.

    • @sjanex
      @sjanex Рік тому

      PS. the majority of people don’t actually care if you don’t want kids, I find it’s always childfree people themselves who keep bringing up this subject and it’s rather boring.

    • @teoleno4019
      @teoleno4019 Рік тому

      @@sjanex It's not like you can turn back the clock, and return them. So ofcourse you would say so.

  • @tonysamawuenyega5656
    @tonysamawuenyega5656 Рік тому

    My disappointment at this panel advocating for women to have risky pregnancies…..smh

    • @steph6109
      @steph6109 Рік тому +1

      There are teenagers dying from pregnancy. Its normally the person more than the age

    • @tonysamawuenyega5656
      @tonysamawuenyega5656 Рік тому

      @@steph6109 not true according research studies… the female body is more primed for pregnancy and recover from the trauma pregnancy causes the body at a younger age than it would an older female…most people are so ignorant about this….by simple logic who would risk a geriatric pregnancy knowing the potential risks involved….many women are childless even more so for leaving it late when ALL THEIR EGGS ARE FRIED. Just saying… I can’t believe this is even a conversation….absolutely dumb.

  • @Frankie_50ways
    @Frankie_50ways Рік тому +1

    Comments will soon close when they have to push an agenda again. ❤

  • @jessicamoise8454
    @jessicamoise8454 Рік тому

    Young lady I disagree with you

  • @babyvideos1911
    @babyvideos1911 Рік тому +1

    I thought it took a man and a woman to make a baby.

  • @TishA-ld5wd
    @TishA-ld5wd Рік тому

    Bring back bk chat London. Lol

    • @michaelstallion8004
      @michaelstallion8004 Рік тому

      this is a different platform for her loooooooool nd even when he said that he completely disagreed with her. she had to hold bck

  • @ptertaintv
    @ptertaintv Рік тому

    I can't get pregnant. 🙂

  • @Transport-Coolfunr
    @Transport-Coolfunr Рік тому

    Esther back at it again.. she misses Bkchat

  • @DonInADress
    @DonInADress Рік тому +1

    Comment section open 😮

  • @EA-js1me
    @EA-js1me Рік тому

    It would be most excellent if people could mind their own business.

  • @islamicscholarteflteachers3216

    AFTER 35 YOU DO NOT HAVE EGGS BUT SCRAMBLED EGGS. LMFAO

    • @HA-qt8vo
      @HA-qt8vo Рік тому +1

      Why dont women hit menopause then?

    • @ChaoticBluez
      @ChaoticBluez Рік тому

      So saying something untrue that’s what’s funny these days?

  • @mycoshe
    @mycoshe Рік тому +6

    Wanna guess which one is married and which one isn't?

  • @shadowdwellerconwis2057
    @shadowdwellerconwis2057 Рік тому +2

    The black woman no doubt has a little Usain bolt running around 😂

  • @Justybow
    @Justybow Рік тому +3

    All the girls who had it young ended up a single mum

    • @chrisdixon1605
      @chrisdixon1605 Рік тому

      Where are all the young Dads then?

    • @steph6109
      @steph6109 Рік тому +3

      ​@@chrisdixon1605 off trying to make single mums

    • @sjanex
      @sjanex Рік тому +2

      Well then maybe more men should take responsibility and wrap their end up if they are not ready to be a dad?

  • @amyclarke41
    @amyclarke41 9 місяців тому +1

    up to each person ax

  • @AD-nz3cc
    @AD-nz3cc Рік тому

    Well no sh$t.