When it comes to the orange peel theory , it isn't that he didn't do the two things it's just it's made her realize how little he contributes to the house in terms of home labor
The issue is, this is a coin flip method with a weighted coin. Basically, if you've reached the point where you're inventing petty tests for your partner to do, you already have one foot out the door and any negative response is going to result in you going "exactly, i knew he sucked." Not only that, but doing this to your partner is, in itself, a red flag. You should never be putting your labor onto your partner with no good reason behind it.
@@alexiatr that was the reddest red flag for me. When the girlfriend is expected to have more responsibility towards a young child than the biological parent, I would question the biological parent's motives for the relationship.
My boyfriend is the epitome of the orange peel theory. He’ll tie my shoe, take my socks off, peel my orange, tie my hair up, anything I needed he would be happy to do for me. And vice versa. It’s good to know you have someone who has your back no matter how small of a thing you need ❤
My fiancé has a lot of back and shoulder pain, making taking off his socks or tying his shoes quite painful some days. He also works 12 hour shifts at a factory. I just instantly help when he asks because I know what it's like to be in pain (daily headaches).
Same… it actually reminded me I asked my bf for something and he ran to go get it for me and stubbed his toe hard on the sofa leg 😂 Anyways I did get him ice and the thing I needed myself but him running to retrieve it for me like a puppy just made me so freaking happy
@@sunglowwolf-7917 nothing is too big or small for him, nothing too expensive… he bought me a switch just to play a game with me, and when it broke he just bought me another one 😭😭😭
I have my own orange test where if i notice I'm always texting or calling first, i stop engaging with the person and wait until they reach out to me first. I've cut people out by letting them make the first move.
@@lordgrape5015 agree !!! its not that i don¨t like my friends, but that i forget things and people if they arent visible in my everyday life. this makes it extremly hard for me to keep old friends in my life. i dont like texting that much too. digital communication does not relate to friendships.
Same I noticed with all my so called friends I was the only one making any effort to arrange plans I wouldn't even get a hi how you doing msg even just once a month (I suffer from depression and always felt like no one cared except my partner who notices my mood changing)
The orange peel theory was an aha moment for me. My ex was always frustrated or upset when I asked for help with little things. Then the bigger things like cleaning the yard, or the house, reading his son bed time stories, was always met with avoidance and anger. My partner now does the simplest tasks and favors without question. He’s always willing to help when he can and responds lovingly and respectful when he can’t help at the moment. No excuses, no irritation. He helps in the yard and has fun with it, helps with holiday hosting until the tasks are finished. I feel supported and like I matter. We make a good team. I was running on an empty tank doing everything myself just because it wasn’t worth asking for help. My partner broke me of that habit slowly. If I was to ask him to peel my orange he would gladly, and he would also receive a shower of kisses. It’s a win win
I think rather than actually using the orange peel test, that it would be a good idea to just evaluate the division of labor in the relationship from time to time. Ultimately, it was the fact that he wasn't doing his fair share of the work in the relationship that led to the breakup rather than him being unwilling to do the small things that the orange peel test calls for.
I think it’s more of a theory/ example- I never did the text with me ex but looking back and applying the test to him, he would fail hands down. It’s like the shopping cart theory, you may not need a shopping cart to assess if someone would put the cart back or not, and how that behavior looks in terms of partner material
Tbh, usually when you’re in love, you don’t have the capacity to see it, especially if you’re young. If she’s with a 22 yo parent, she’s probably too young to be able to see that he wasn’t giving as much.
Honestly i would to. 33F and married. The reason is that i would need a good reason to move from a comfortable position to even go pee. Ask me when I'm already standing or next to you. If you're in the Kitchen and I'm not and you ask me something you could do yourself, i wouldn't move.
Lolol my husband would fail the orange peel test so hard but 100% would help me with all the big tasks I ask him to do. If you need the test to figure out if you're an equal in the a partnership then you probably already have your answer.
Yesss! 😂 It's probably like some teen learned the section in psych class covering that people are more willing to do something big for you, if they do something small first. Therefore, being a teen, let's make some random content with this! And everyone now is focusing on the media they're learning it from, rather than 'here's a way to make sure you aren't looking at your relationship with rose colored glasses' Lmao
Reddit logic is something else. I literally watch these videos cause I can’t go on the app anymore. I was getting into more arguements about skewed logic more than the topic at hand.
Regarding period questions: You cannot squeeze the blood out yourself. But if you are using the restroom, more often comes out because of the contraction of muscles, positioning, and the exposure to open air.
On top of inability of squeezing the blood out, you have no control with the flow. You don’t have enough reaction time neither because you feel it when it is “stepping out of the door”. 😅 I tried to eat or drink certain stuff to shorten the duration, it didn’t work.
This is untrue. Having an orgasm causes the uterus to contract, therefore squeezing out blood. Also, one can massage the uterus externally, which docs/midwives do to encourage delivery of the placenta.
God I love my boyfriend I paused after the first story and asked him to put my hair up he was mid league match and still stopped everything to do it without question and I got a forehead kiss
The Orange Peel theory isn't a necessary test. Each person needs to constantly look at their partner and evaluate is this person contributing equally to this relationship. And guys, NO a job and paying bills doesn't qualify as equally contributing because you had to do that before you got into the relationship. You also had do do dishes, do laundry, do housework, and that shit doesn't fall onto your partner just because she is a female.
I don’t have to use the orange peel theory because my man does small acts of service unprompted 😂 He will tie my shoe, grab me a glass of water, bring me pads, he installed an extra shelf in HIS bathroom above the toilet for my sanitary products (I don’t live with him)
Story 1: I think the real point is that if you have to think about using that to test the relationship, then you need to think about that relationship as a whole. Because clearly your already having issues. Clearly she did dodge the bullet. I wouldn't use the trend because it is very immature. Also great show 🎉
Exactly... I think if you're in a relationship, and you feel the need to test it in this way, that's the sign that you're probably not in the relationship you want to be in. Wanting to do it at all is the red flag you need to pay attention to.
Seriously. You would think that an everyday scenario would answer this question or hypothesis. When I'm at my boyfriends apartment he asks if I want anything for dinner without me asking or when I ask him for hot chocolate or a snack, he gets it for me. I don't have to do it as a test to see if he'll do simple things for me. If you have a good relationship, that's not really a thing to think about.
I agree the real red flag is the neglect of the biological daughter. You don't get a do-over of those formative years. Once they're gone, they are gone and that the same time, they are always there.
💯!! If my guy texted me and said "we need to talk" I would take that as a serious thing and not oh let's talk while you babysit my kid and give me a ride to go drinking and just expecting it. In this case the orange peel theory worked for OP.
Third story: Yes, absolutely dodged a nuke. Probably jumping the shark here but I'm pretty sure that man was hiding a lot and would have probably expected OP to take care of the kids herself because it's the woman's job.
2:16 As someone who is increasingly disabled, I have been exceedingly fortunate because my amazing husband has had to take on the responsibility of being my caregiver as well. So calling men simps really pisses me off. I appreciate my husband and all he does for me. I don’t think a trend is necessarily a reason to breakup, I think it matters more what your partner does when the chips are down.
Husband and I had the "after death" talk and I told him I'd haunt him if he kept himself miserable/lonely if I died first. Bro, I'd be dead! Absolutely NO reason to be more miserable than necessary! It's not "cheating" 🤦♂️
Story 1: I think op did the trend to see if the theory works in practice and i did for her. In a partnership when your bigger needs are never met or compromised on (this goes fir both parties) the little need matter that much more. The theroy literally just made her critically rethink here role in their relationship and she realized it was one sided in her eyes. Now its up to her if she want to talk this out with her partner to make compromised or want to find someone else
Second story, sounds like OP is playing games. She asked for a break, told him she wanted to extend it and then expects him to chase her? What about him respecting boundaries? If they're taking breaks (ie soft break ups), over a stupid fight, then they should just break up. Sounds like some big insecurities. He obviously wasn't really flirting, he was demonstrating to his friend.
So it wouldn't be cheating if she gave her friends SO a bj to demonstrate a proper bj so that her friend could keep her SO satisfied right? After all it's just a demonstration not actual cheating.
When I was eight months pregnant, my husband absolutely tied my boot laces multiple times because it hurt to reach my feet. I wouldn’t do the orange peel test; he already does so much for me. ❤
Mine did this as well, my feet were swollen so bad by the 8th month I was wearing mandals because nothing else would fit. He tied my sneakers many times before that. Also funnily enough as I've gotten older I had to have surgery on my hands. My teenage son cut my meat, tied my shoes, and actually hooked my bra because I couldn't.🤣
Yup, you clearly don't have rose colored glasses on with your relationship, there's no need to see if you do. You found an awesome guy that's clearly a wonderful partner, and seems like he's going to be an awesome dad! 💙
It is 100% IMPOSSIBLE for a woman to "hold it in" on her period. Other impossible things that men believe a woman can do on her period are: choose when our periods start, or choose their duration. This is why sex Ed in schools is so important. (And I know there will be many people who think this is ridiculous and will think there is no way anyone could believe these things to be true, but it happens way more often than any of us know 😂)
Story 1: I feel like TikTok challenges are ridiculous but in this case it wasn’t a challenge for him it was for her. She took stock of what was happening in their relationship. I can tell you that when I realized that he had her come pick him up because his mom wasn’t home, he also expected her to babysit so he could go out with friends; she dodged a bullet for sure.
My fav was definitely the two moms. That young woman lost a real gem due to her ignorance. That son is is one in a million. Right to the decision not to reveal the girlfriend's ignorance to protect his moms' feelings. I am sorry he is sad about the break up, yet this was clearly just one of the issues her small mindedness was going to cause. You're amazing OP, do not compromise your humanity for anyone.❤ ❤❤
Everyone talking about the orange peel theory but no one’s answering the gritty details of Sam’s period question so I guess it’s up to me to be the hero we need. You can ABSOLUTELY push it out! Sometimes you get big clots you can just push out and sometimes when you feel a huge amount that’s sort of just been building up you can push it out!
On the question about dating again after your significant other passes away I am going through that myself. My fiance passed on December 17, 2021 from multiple organ failure and sepsis after getting pancreatitis. Even before this we knew there was a good chance he didn't have many years left due to his health. This was something we spoke about and he told me he wanted me to find someone after he was gone, that I deserved to be happy and loved and he didn't want me to be alone. I only recently felt ready to get back out there though I do admit it is still tough, and one thing I know I will have to be sure of and keep in check is that knee jerk reaction to compare anyone I end up dating to my late fiance, we had a wonderful 9 year relationship where we did not have a single fight. Oh we had disagreements but we would take a few moments to calm down then would talk rationally like adults should. That was the first truly healthy relationship I'd ever been in and I will forever be grateful for it because it has shown me that I do deserve to be treated way better than I had been in the past.
My boyfriend also passes the orange peel theory, I’d do the same for him. I have no doubt he would take care of me if I was to become disabled, after birth, or any other theoretical situation. Respectfully brother, there’s nothing wrong with being a simp. You’re supposed to love your partner. 😭
Agreed, "oh no, these people love and respect each other!! They have an awesome sexual relationship, they can go to each other for softness or rally when frustrated?! How gay, you actually LIKE women? What a Simp! " Lol 😆 like dude I really want you to find someone and be happy, then you'll stop acting like a pissed off kid. I find that people who say simp un-ironically are never in loving relationships. Nothing against single people, but those who love the person they are with, for all their quirks, would never describe people with that.
as for the pad story, I'm old now but back when I needed them I always kept an EXTENSIVE maxi pad arsenal. I had copious amounts at home, a decent size stash at work and in my car because you never knew when it would strike. I would probably never have to ask anyone to go buy any pads ever because I was always fully stocked
My boyfriend says this to me all the time; I took a video and sent it to him and proceeded to laugh. My agreement with him is that I also have to be a worm OR I want to be a mushroom; we get to decompose the world together
I HATE, HATE HAAAAATTTE when people ask/demand an apology!!!!! It comes across so superior! "You must ask my forgiveness! We are not amused nor are we pleased." Apologies should be a natural, unasked for form of communication of ,regret and understanding of "wrong-doing" .
Thats probably the point tho. If the SO cant figure out what he did wrong and genuinely apologize, then it might be time to let go. Or at least talk about why he thinks he doesnt need to apologize
And the one demanding the apology made HERSELF upset. It was obvious what he was doing from the beginning, and she was fine at first and then decided it bothered her. She is not owed an apology from him, and expecting him to apologize to her is absolutely ridiculous.
The story where the boyfriend asked about op not having a new relationship after he died,.. its statistically shown that its men who remarry and quickly at that. So him asking her to remain miserable and single is garbage control behavior.
With periods it is like holding a bottle filled with liquid upside down. You can’t stop the flow unless you stopper it and you can push more stuff out as if you squeeze the bottle
Until it overflows around the stopper and you are frantically trying not to look like agoddamn penguin while hauling ass to the nearest bathroom lmfao 🤣 😂 💀
@ninahigh2027 wait? There are light flow days? Mine were always heavy like 5 to 6 days, then nothing. Really sucked. Which is why i had a hysterectomy at 38
My husband was a wfh during the pandemic. I would go to him (while he was working) and ask him to pls tie my hair because my hands were dirty. The way he tied my hair was messy because he didn't know how to do it, but still, he tried his best every time, haha. I think it was cute, and I feel loved. 🤭
Orange peel theory is sooooooo fucking valid!!! It's a means of checking in on the relationship, but acts of service/love is probably my strongest live language tbh.
Ahh I did the orange peel theory as a joke like a year ago, around when my boyfriend (then of 1.5 years) moved in. I had a mandarin orange and said hey can you peel this for me baby? And he smiled cutely and did it. 🤷🏻♀️ he’s adorable 😍😍
I could ask my husband to slap a salami on the shower wall and say i love the smell when I shower and he would do it. He would be weirded out, but I know he would do it. And he is a kind and loving person, who really is gentle to our children and me. So i am very lucky to have him. With and without peeltheory.
My great grandpa dated after his wife died. He was in his 80s and 90s. Him and his girlfriend had arguments and he asked her for a "break". She was too nuts to outright break up with, she would be very upset. So like two teens with all the time in the world for drama, he slowly ghosted her. Never too late! xD
My dad was the first boy to ever insist on enetering the program at my High School for girls who became pregnant young to learn about parenthood and to be able to bring the baby to school basically…he insisted to be a good dad and learn too and had four daughters whom he was the only parent there during every first period…this is so stupid for him to complain over. 30:10
I feel lucky, I don’t have to do the orange peel test as my OH does the little things. As an example, I have a tiny flesh wound on my finger from slicing it and from when I first did it two days ago, he’s been helping me change the gauze when I change it 🥰
You don't have to run naked through the house just get your towels nice and warm wrap it up in a little ball wrap another towel around it and by the time you get out of the shower you have a nice toasty little towel inside the wrapped towel
1.) Wingman updates were NOT juicy......& 2.).....you know who doesn't respect relationships??? Effing UA-cam ADS interrupting EVERY.SINGLE.STORY🤬 As for death departed....my grandp died after my grandparents were married 49 years, and my grandma remarried to a man that had a similar widower situation.....they loved each other very much, but both decided to be buried next to their first spouses, as they wanted to respect the love of their lifelong partners/parents of their children. After being super salty about my grandma being remarried so fast, I was really touched by this gesture of respect for my grandpa & it put things in perspective for me when it became apparent that my grandma would never be over losing my grandpa, but simply didn't want to be alone.
I asked my man of six years about the orange peel method. His response, "I might do some of the small things for you, but I'd rather save my energy for the bigger things."
To be fair, as a woman, MY definition and idea of a wingman was “backup.” As in, your buddy is chatting up a chick and when her overprotective friends step in, you as the wingman distract her friends by chatting them up so your buddy can close the deal and get the digits of the friend he’s interested in. I think everyone sucks in that story as the girlfriend may have assumed that’s what it meant and the BF may have thought differently so her saying she was “okay” with it was she was cool with it by her own definition and her BF has the right to be annoyed and consider her as overreacting because he thought she was cool with it by his definition. I think he’s right to be upset and feel lied to because she clearly wasn’t okay with what he considers to be a wingman and she clearly had no idea her bf thought that was how you wingman.
Damn I’m so lucky. My boyfriend (now fiancé) always does little things for me, every day, I don’t even need to ask. Perhaps it helps that I do so too for him, it seems to be one of our love languages to do thoughtful little things. Laundry? He will come and help, kitchen? He says Health to your hand and cleans everything with me. Car? He goes around to open my door, even if it’s just a small drive to the market. I’m literally blessed 😅❤
I lose interest in people who catch my eye the second I hear they are in relationship and would not be friends with anyone who would pine after / try to get with someone taken. I'm woman.
Agreed, don't put that bad juju on me Ricky Bobby! "Thank you for showing a character flaw that will cause chaos in the lives of those who choose to associate with you. I'll see my way out".
I would never do the orange peel theory test. Because I already know that whatever little task I'd ask my boyfriend to do, he'd do for me. And I know if do the exact same for him 💕 Now......my past relationship (ex fiancé)...99% chance he would not but I would for him. And I know that now 🤷🏽♀️
I think the orange peel thing is a good indicator to pay attention to how much you are willing to put up with and why. Investigate why you’re willing to accept breadcrumbs.
Orange peel theory. 20+ years ago my ex was a union painter & liked oranges. I peeled them for his lunch & put them in a ziplock baggie. His coworkers made fun up him. I embarrassed him. 😂
A man being unwilling to buy his partner pad/tampons is a HUGE red flag. I remember being in middle school when my uncle told me something along those lines and honestly ot helped me to not be so embarrassed about buying them myself. Its a natural thing that we CAN NOT control and we have absolutely no reason to be embarrassed about it. My husband will biy me whatever i need and tries his hardest to get exactly what i ask for (i recently changed which brand i use) and i have a coworker who carries pads in his backpack for his daughters/wife. We cant help it and deal with all of the cramps and crappiness that comes with it the least our men can do is grow TF up and buy us what we need
Last story: What happens with future events? Is this her plan? to trade them out or only the first one that went to dinner and never included the other mom. No, this is more than a red flag!!! BEST SON EVER! THOSE TWO MOMS RAISED HIS INTO A GREAT HUMAN!!!
I think little acts of love are important. I show my love to my parents by giving them impromptu massages, pouring my dad wine while he’s watching tv, getting him a damp cloth when he sweats (he has a health problem) making my mom tea, asking h to em if thy eyes need anything. My parents do waaaayyy more than that for me. I’m not a very good daughter in comparison
I'm a 37 year old mom with five incredible kids, and a set of twins on the way. My husband works hard and is an amazing and loving dad, and coming from a fatherless home myself, I cherish this for my kids. He almost died in a car accident years ago, like inches away from death, because the car ended up smashing into him and wrecking him from the waist down, breaking his legs and pelvis in several places. So being a widow, or being left alone, is something I've thought about randomly because it did almost happen to me. If he calls me on his way to work or while driving it will actually give me anxiety because of the phone call he made to me after his wreck telling me he thought he was gonna die. I decided I would not marry or be in a relationship again until my kids were grown, if something were to happen to him. My kids are my most precious possessions and I would never jeopardize them by bringing a mistake of a man into their lives, after having such an amazing dad. Coming from an abusive home, with a stepdad who was physically and mentally abusive, and a mother who sat by and let it happen, that is my greatest fear about bringing someone else into my kids lives. I do not consider the man my mom married in any way as a father. I also know stepmoms can be absolutely toxic, so I've told my husband if he brings an abusive wretch into my kids lives, if I die, I will haunt him from the grave.
I started listening to this right after i got done grocery shopping. Before she was even done explaining the orange theory i had asked my husband to help me bring in the groceries and he put on his shoes to help. So i guess my husband passed the orange theory. As for the marriage after the death of a spouse thing. My husband and I have actually had that conversation. And we both said that remarriage would 100% okay but neither of us are sure if we would. I did also say that if our children were still young when i died that it would still be okay if he remarried.
This one is odd to me, because I really don’t like “relationship tests” as a general rule - but thinking about it, my partner does small things for me that I could do myself as a way to show affection quite often. I do the same. I don’t think it’s a relationship ender by itself, but if it helps someone take a step back and examine things… maybe it’s helpful after all.
My husband used to put my shoes on for me, just because he wanted me to feel loved, he did it for months. It was so sweet, If I told him, "baby, I miss that, would you put my shoes on this week?" He would. Bc he loves me. He sees it as an act of love and sympathy. Ladies, I promise, this coming from an SA survivor, and a man hater, I believe there are good men out there. And they are looking for you as much as you are looking for them. I was in so many relationships, like the girl who tested her man with the orange peel theory, she can do better. Your man should want to do things to make your life easier, not always making your life harder. I've been with my husband for 6 years, married for a bit over a year, and we don't argue, we have problems like all couples, but he loves me and has so many ways to show me.
Asking a woman to hold it in is the equivalent to ask someone to stop bleeding after they've been stabbed, and yes we can squeeze it out, equivalent to flexing in the place you've been stabbed. Hope this helps lol
Literally all these people should break up. The guy who wanted her to stay single if he died has cult leader vibes. Like I could understand if they were teenagers because they're weird but, that's literally nuts.
When it comes to the orange peel theory , it isn't that he didn't do the two things it's just it's made her realize how little he contributes to the house in terms of home labor
Agreed. It shed light!
Specially since they're not married. Fir what thr MIL said, they were seeing her already to have allvthe duties of a wife and a mother
The issue is, this is a coin flip method with a weighted coin.
Basically, if you've reached the point where you're inventing petty tests for your partner to do, you already have one foot out the door and any negative response is going to result in you going "exactly, i knew he sucked."
Not only that, but doing this to your partner is, in itself, a red flag. You should never be putting your labor onto your partner with no good reason behind it.
@@alexiatr that was the reddest red flag for me. When the girlfriend is expected to have more responsibility towards a young child than the biological parent, I would question the biological parent's motives for the relationship.
@@MizutamariVTvery well said!
My boyfriend is the epitome of the orange peel theory. He’ll tie my shoe, take my socks off, peel my orange, tie my hair up, anything I needed he would be happy to do for me. And vice versa. It’s good to know you have someone who has your back no matter how small of a thing you need ❤
My fiancé has a lot of back and shoulder pain, making taking off his socks or tying his shoes quite painful some days. He also works 12 hour shifts at a factory.
I just instantly help when he asks because I know what it's like to be in pain (daily headaches).
Same… it actually reminded me I asked my bf for something and he ran to go get it for me and stubbed his toe hard on the sofa leg 😂
Anyways I did get him ice and the thing I needed myself but him running to retrieve it for me like a puppy just made me so freaking happy
@@sunglowwolf-7917 nothing is too big or small for him, nothing too expensive… he bought me a switch just to play a game with me, and when it broke he just bought me another one 😭😭😭
My husband is like that, too. We both do for each other. ❤❤
Mature, happy relationships in which y'all communicate and reciprocate respect 😭😄😁😊
Ughhhhh, gotta fucking LOVE IT!!!!!! ❤️
I have my own orange test where if i notice I'm always texting or calling first, i stop engaging with the person and wait until they reach out to me first. I've cut people out by letting them make the first move.
You're the Bane of my personality type lol. I can't start convos for shit but I'm good with continuing or adding to them.
@@lordgrape5015 agree !!! its not that i don¨t like my friends, but that i forget things and people if they arent visible in my everyday life. this makes it extremly hard for me to keep old friends in my life. i dont like texting that much too. digital communication does not relate to friendships.
Same I noticed with all my so called friends I was the only one making any effort to arrange plans I wouldn't even get a hi how you doing msg even just once a month (I suffer from depression and always felt like no one cared except my partner who notices my mood changing)
The orange peel theory was an aha moment for me. My ex was always frustrated or upset when I asked for help with little things. Then the bigger things like cleaning the yard, or the house, reading his son bed time stories, was always met with avoidance and anger. My partner now does the simplest tasks and favors without question. He’s always willing to help when he can and responds lovingly and respectful when he can’t help at the moment. No excuses, no irritation. He helps in the yard and has fun with it, helps with holiday hosting until the tasks are finished. I feel supported and like I matter. We make a good team. I was running on an empty tank doing everything myself just because it wasn’t worth asking for help. My partner broke me of that habit slowly. If I was to ask him to peel my orange he would gladly, and he would also receive a shower of kisses. It’s a win win
An ok boyfriend gets you pads
A good boyfriend gets you pads and chocolate
An amazing boyfriend gets you pads, midol, chocolate and a heating pad
Booom!!!!!!!
I think rather than actually using the orange peel test, that it would be a good idea to just evaluate the division of labor in the relationship from time to time. Ultimately, it was the fact that he wasn't doing his fair share of the work in the relationship that led to the breakup rather than him being unwilling to do the small things that the orange peel test calls for.
I think it’s more of a theory/ example- I never did the text with me ex but looking back and applying the test to him, he would fail hands down. It’s like the shopping cart theory, you may not need a shopping cart to assess if someone would put the cart back or not, and how that behavior looks in terms of partner material
It was the orange peel test that made op evaluate the labour share, so it worked in a way
Tbh, usually when you’re in love, you don’t have the capacity to see it, especially if you’re young. If she’s with a 22 yo parent, she’s probably too young to be able to see that he wasn’t giving as much.
I get the feeling Sam would fail the orange peel test so fast 😂
Honestly right now I would. Not ready for a relationship currently 😅 but I have high reviews from past girlfriends for thoughtfulness
Honestly i would to. 33F and married. The reason is that i would need a good reason to move from a comfortable position to even go pee. Ask me when I'm already standing or next to you. If you're in the Kitchen and I'm not and you ask me something you could do yourself, i wouldn't move.
Lolol my husband would fail the orange peel test so hard but 100% would help me with all the big tasks I ask him to do. If you need the test to figure out if you're an equal in the a partnership then you probably already have your answer.
My partner does both of those things regularly for me. But its cause i have trouble with tying my shoes and orange peels trigger my texture issues
@@OKOPShow Sam, when you start taking new applicants let me know 😜
STORY 1
IRONY: REDDIT(Internet Strangers) Scolding OP for taking Advice from TIKTOK(Internet Strangers)
Yesss! 😂
It's probably like some teen learned the section in psych class covering that people are more willing to do something big for you, if they do something small first.
Therefore, being a teen, let's make some random content with this!
And everyone now is focusing on the media they're learning it from, rather than 'here's a way to make sure you aren't looking at your relationship with rose colored glasses' Lmao
Reddit logic is something else. I literally watch these videos cause I can’t go on the app anymore. I was getting into more arguements about skewed logic more than the topic at hand.
She wasn't asking for it to be braided lol she was asking for the dude to put her hair in a ponytail lmao
Regarding period questions: You cannot squeeze the blood out yourself. But if you are using the restroom, more often comes out because of the contraction of muscles, positioning, and the exposure to open air.
On top of inability of squeezing the blood out, you have no control with the flow. You don’t have enough reaction time neither because you feel it when it is “stepping out of the door”. 😅 I tried to eat or drink certain stuff to shorten the duration, it didn’t work.
This is untrue. Having an orgasm causes the uterus to contract, therefore squeezing out blood. Also, one can massage the uterus externally, which docs/midwives do to encourage delivery of the placenta.
God I love my boyfriend I paused after the first story and asked him to put my hair up he was mid league match and still stopped everything to do it without question and I got a forehead kiss
He's a keeper..☺️
@@aprilfox9205 he is indeed
*mid league match?!?* omg he‘s absolutely a keeper. During an unpausable online game? 😳😳
The Orange Peel theory isn't a necessary test. Each person needs to constantly look at their partner and evaluate is this person contributing equally to this relationship. And guys, NO a job and paying bills doesn't qualify as equally contributing because you had to do that before you got into the relationship. You also had do do dishes, do laundry, do housework, and that shit doesn't fall onto your partner just because she is a female.
I don’t have to use the orange peel theory because my man does small acts of service unprompted 😂 He will tie my shoe, grab me a glass of water, bring me pads, he installed an extra shelf in HIS bathroom above the toilet for my sanitary products (I don’t live with him)
Story 1: I think the real point is that if you have to think about using that to test the relationship, then you need to think about that relationship as a whole. Because clearly your already having issues. Clearly she did dodge the bullet. I wouldn't use the trend because it is very immature. Also great show 🎉
Exactly... I think if you're in a relationship, and you feel the need to test it in this way, that's the sign that you're probably not in the relationship you want to be in. Wanting to do it at all is the red flag you need to pay attention to.
Seriously. You would think that an everyday scenario would answer this question or hypothesis. When I'm at my boyfriends apartment he asks if I want anything for dinner without me asking or when I ask him for hot chocolate or a snack, he gets it for me. I don't have to do it as a test to see if he'll do simple things for me. If you have a good relationship, that's not really a thing to think about.
I agree the real red flag is the neglect of the biological daughter. You don't get a do-over of those formative years. Once they're gone, they are gone and that the same time, they are always there.
It’s like a runny nose. You cannot hold it in but in some instances you can blow it. Lol
I cackled 😆
Wow he was getting her to pick him up to go drink and her watch the baby. When all she wanted to do was talk. He doesn't give a f#*k. He's using her.
💯!! If my guy texted me and said "we need to talk" I would take that as a serious thing and not oh let's talk while you babysit my kid and give me a ride to go drinking and just expecting it. In this case the orange peel theory worked for OP.
He didnt even make sure she was ok with watching his kid, just assumed she was going to be at his beck and call
Third story: Yes, absolutely dodged a nuke. Probably jumping the shark here but I'm pretty sure that man was hiding a lot and would have probably expected OP to take care of the kids herself because it's the woman's job.
Dude we turn into ketchup packets that got stepped on when we sneeze or cough on our periods😂
best description ever!!
You're not a w*man.
"DONT USE YOUR HANDS, USE YOUR TONGUE I WANT YOU TO PRACTICE!🗣🗣"
Golly😂
I know!!! Coming out of left field hahahahaha 😂 🤣
2:16 As someone who is increasingly disabled, I have been exceedingly fortunate because my amazing husband has had to take on the responsibility of being my caregiver as well. So calling men simps really pisses me off. I appreciate my husband and all he does for me. I don’t think a trend is necessarily a reason to breakup, I think it matters more what your partner does when the chips are down.
Shout out to OP’s moms in the last story. They clearly raised that young man the right way.
Husband and I had the "after death" talk and I told him I'd haunt him if he kept himself miserable/lonely if I died first. Bro, I'd be dead! Absolutely NO reason to be more miserable than necessary! It's not "cheating" 🤦♂️
I think the orange peel theory worked like a charm for her. It provides solid measurable proof.
That first story is like using the wrong method on a math problem but getting the right answer anyways
The boyfriend did not overreact clearly just got tired of her insecurities Is a deal breaker never cheated went on about their day
Story 1: I think op did the trend to see if the theory works in practice and i did for her. In a partnership when your bigger needs are never met or compromised on (this goes fir both parties) the little need matter that much more. The theroy literally just made her critically rethink here role in their relationship and she realized it was one sided in her eyes. Now its up to her if she want to talk this out with her partner to make compromised or want to find someone else
Riley coming in with the burn on Sam 1:37 😂😂😂😂❤
Second story, sounds like OP is playing games. She asked for a break, told him she wanted to extend it and then expects him to chase her? What about him respecting boundaries? If they're taking breaks (ie soft break ups), over a stupid fight, then they should just break up. Sounds like some big insecurities. He obviously wasn't really flirting, he was demonstrating to his friend.
So it wouldn't be cheating if she gave her friends SO a bj to demonstrate a proper bj so that her friend could keep her SO satisfied right? After all it's just a demonstration not actual cheating.
100% and I had to scroll too far to find this.
That OP sounded insufferable, tbh.
When I was eight months pregnant, my husband absolutely tied my boot laces multiple times because it hurt to reach my feet.
I wouldn’t do the orange peel test; he already does so much for me. ❤
Mine did this as well, my feet were swollen so bad by the 8th month I was wearing mandals because nothing else would fit. He tied my sneakers many times before that. Also funnily enough as I've gotten older I had to have surgery on my hands. My teenage son cut my meat, tied my shoes, and actually hooked my bra because I couldn't.🤣
Yup, you clearly don't have rose colored glasses on with your relationship, there's no need to see if you do.
You found an awesome guy that's clearly a wonderful partner, and seems like he's going to be an awesome dad! 💙
It is 100% IMPOSSIBLE for a woman to "hold it in" on her period. Other impossible things that men believe a woman can do on her period are: choose when our periods start, or choose their duration. This is why sex Ed in schools is so important. (And I know there will be many people who think this is ridiculous and will think there is no way anyone could believe these things to be true, but it happens way more often than any of us know 😂)
Story 1: I feel like TikTok challenges are ridiculous but in this case it wasn’t a challenge for him it was for her. She took stock of what was happening in their relationship. I can tell you that when I realized that he had her come pick him up because his mom wasn’t home, he also expected her to babysit so he could go out with friends; she dodged a bullet for sure.
You guys have been keeping me sane this week 😭 go to podcast for anything ❤
My fav was definitely the two moms. That young woman lost a real gem due to her ignorance. That son is is one in a million. Right to the decision not to reveal the girlfriend's ignorance to protect his moms' feelings. I am sorry he is sad about the break up, yet this was clearly just one of the issues her small mindedness was going to cause. You're amazing OP, do not compromise your humanity for anyone.❤ ❤❤
Everyone talking about the orange peel theory but no one’s answering the gritty details of Sam’s period question so I guess it’s up to me to be the hero we need. You can ABSOLUTELY push it out! Sometimes you get big clots you can just push out and sometimes when you feel a huge amount that’s sort of just been building up you can push it out!
You can definitely push stuff out but not really hold it in
On the question about dating again after your significant other passes away I am going through that myself. My fiance passed on December 17, 2021 from multiple organ failure and sepsis after getting pancreatitis. Even before this we knew there was a good chance he didn't have many years left due to his health. This was something we spoke about and he told me he wanted me to find someone after he was gone, that I deserved to be happy and loved and he didn't want me to be alone. I only recently felt ready to get back out there though I do admit it is still tough, and one thing I know I will have to be sure of and keep in check is that knee jerk reaction to compare anyone I end up dating to my late fiance, we had a wonderful 9 year relationship where we did not have a single fight. Oh we had disagreements but we would take a few moments to calm down then would talk rationally like adults should. That was the first truly healthy relationship I'd ever been in and I will forever be grateful for it because it has shown me that I do deserve to be treated way better than I had been in the past.
Ngl, Sam keeps wearing the orange overalls looking like an overall snack
S1: OP isn’t breaking up over a TikTok, it’s over what it represents.
My boyfriend also passes the orange peel theory, I’d do the same for him. I have no doubt he would take care of me if I was to become disabled, after birth, or any other theoretical situation. Respectfully brother, there’s nothing wrong with being a simp. You’re supposed to love your partner. 😭
Agreed, "oh no, these people love and respect each other!! They have an awesome sexual relationship, they can go to each other for softness or rally when frustrated?! How gay, you actually LIKE women? What a Simp! "
Lol 😆 like dude I really want you to find someone and be happy, then you'll stop acting like a pissed off kid.
I find that people who say simp un-ironically are never in loving relationships.
Nothing against single people, but those who love the person they are with, for all their quirks, would never describe people with that.
Asking your SO to not remarry if you die is ultimate 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
Also pad story : op did not just dodge a bullet, she dodged a cannonball !
Dope shirt John. Lookin fly and fresh as heck.
John got the best shirts ngl
as for the pad story, I'm old now but back when I needed them I always kept an EXTENSIVE maxi pad arsenal. I had copious amounts at home, a decent size stash at work and in my car because you never knew when it would strike. I would probably never have to ask anyone to go buy any pads ever because I was always fully stocked
I have unknowingly used the orange peel theory. My husband helps me out every time. He never turns me down when I need help. ❤
The death one she should've just lied when it was brought up just like guys do when you ask if we'd love you if you were a worm
Riley coming in with the 23 minute comment 😭💀 yes lmfao
My boyfriend says this to me all the time; I took a video and sent it to him and proceeded to laugh.
My agreement with him is that I also have to be a worm OR I want to be a mushroom; we get to decompose the world together
I HATE, HATE HAAAAATTTE when people ask/demand an apology!!!!! It comes across so superior! "You must ask my forgiveness! We are not amused nor are we pleased." Apologies should be a natural, unasked for form of communication of ,regret and understanding of "wrong-doing" .
Thats probably the point tho. If the SO cant figure out what he did wrong and genuinely apologize, then it might be time to let go. Or at least talk about why he thinks he doesnt need to apologize
And the one demanding the apology made HERSELF upset.
It was obvious what he was doing from the beginning, and she was fine at first and then decided it bothered her. She is not owed an apology from him, and expecting him to apologize to her is absolutely ridiculous.
@@Ambariffic yes!
The story where the boyfriend asked about op not having a new relationship after he died,.. its statistically shown that its men who remarry and quickly at that. So him asking her to remain miserable and single is garbage control behavior.
The last story was the plot of The Birdcage with Robin Williams and Nathan Lane. Replace moms with dads and there you go.
3:42 OP for sure got that hack from Diary of a Wimpy Kid
With periods it is like holding a bottle filled with liquid upside down. You can’t stop the flow unless you stopper it and you can push more stuff out as if you squeeze the bottle
Until it overflows around the stopper and you are frantically trying not to look like agoddamn penguin while hauling ass to the nearest bathroom lmfao 🤣 😂 💀
THIS IS THE BEST ANSWER -Sam
@@B.Harper7 good thing that my periods are somewhat chunky during my heavy flow days so no accidents waddling to the bathroom yet
@ninahigh2027 wait? There are light flow days? Mine were always heavy like 5 to 6 days, then nothing. Really sucked. Which is why i had a hysterectomy at 38
@@jenv4074 yeah… when my period begins they tent to be really heavy and then teeter off to a light trickle towards the end
Riley has become my favorite part of the show lol
Anyone else have a crush on Riley?! ✋️
My husband was a wfh during the pandemic. I would go to him (while he was working) and ask him to pls tie my hair because my hands were dirty. The way he tied my hair was messy because he didn't know how to do it, but still, he tried his best every time, haha. I think it was cute, and I feel loved. 🤭
Story 2: He was the wing man and showing him how it works is not cheating. He did it with no intend to do anything further.
At what point did his friend play any part of that interaction, though? The friend wasn't even close enough to hear.
Op’s gf: They are not raging homophobes but they just don’t like that.
Me: so they are indirect homophobes.
Y’all are amazing!!! Love your videos!!!
John is trying to end relationship with that question how long will you wait
Another one!!!! 🎉 thanks again
Orange peel theory is sooooooo fucking valid!!! It's a means of checking in on the relationship, but acts of service/love is probably my strongest live language tbh.
When i get a hug on my period i become a ketchup bottle
BRUH IM DEAD 💀😂😂
@@OKOPShow just like my uterus lining
Oh my lord, I am dying. This is perfect. 🤣
@@toxickirstyx3153 o thank you lolol
Ahh I did the orange peel theory as a joke like a year ago, around when my boyfriend (then of 1.5 years) moved in. I had a mandarin orange and said hey can you peel this for me baby? And he smiled cutely and did it. 🤷🏻♀️ he’s adorable 😍😍
No, you cannot hold in period blood, not even a little bit. Yes, you can force some out. 😂😂😂
I could ask my husband to slap a salami on the shower wall and say i love the smell when I shower and he would do it. He would be weirded out, but I know he would do it.
And he is a kind and loving person, who really is gentle to our children and me.
So i am very lucky to have him. With and without peeltheory.
My great grandpa dated after his wife died. He was in his 80s and 90s.
Him and his girlfriend had arguments and he asked her for a "break".
She was too nuts to outright break up with, she would be very upset. So like two teens with all the time in the world for drama, he slowly ghosted her. Never too late! xD
You guys are awesome. The stories make me feel lucky in life. You give me hope. hahaha...
You cannot hold back. Period at all. Lol.
Lol you can only push it out on accident when you sneeze.
My dad was the first boy to ever insist on enetering the program at my High School for girls who became pregnant young to learn about parenthood and to be able to bring the baby to school basically…he insisted to be a good dad and learn too and had four daughters whom he was the only parent there during every first period…this is so stupid for him to complain over. 30:10
Is OP in story 2 dating Barney Stinson? 😂 Have ya met Ted? Then starts dating Robin 😂😂
I feel lucky, I don’t have to do the orange peel test as my OH does the little things. As an example, I have a tiny flesh wound on my finger from slicing it and from when I first did it two days ago, he’s been helping me change the gauze when I change it 🥰
No you can’t hold in your period. Not even a little bit 😅 and yes we can contract our muscles to push stuff out. That’s how we give birth lmfao 😅
I would say her tasks were not simple, she wasn’t sat next to him and said oh can you put my hair up for me, she was in an entirely different room
You don't have to run naked through the house just get your towels nice and warm wrap it up in a little ball wrap another towel around it and by the time you get out of the shower you have a nice toasty little towel inside the wrapped towel
Not a MAYOR tea alert! 😂😂😂
1.) Wingman updates were NOT juicy......& 2.).....you know who doesn't respect relationships??? Effing UA-cam ADS interrupting EVERY.SINGLE.STORY🤬
As for death departed....my grandp died after my grandparents were married 49 years, and my grandma remarried to a man that had a similar widower situation.....they loved each other very much, but both decided to be buried next to their first spouses, as they wanted to respect the love of their lifelong partners/parents of their children. After being super salty about my grandma being remarried so fast, I was really touched by this gesture of respect for my grandpa & it put things in perspective for me when it became apparent that my grandma would never be over losing my grandpa, but simply didn't want to be alone.
Good rule of thumb for moving on after losing an SO is to wait till you done grieving their lost. Just to be fair to everyone else
Orange peel…never tried this as a test but it makes me realize what a loving and kind relationship I have with my husband.
We can def squeeze it out lmao.
28:36
They would obviously know he's a real guy and not a troon, LOL.
I asked my man of six years about the orange peel method. His response, "I might do some of the small things for you, but I'd rather save my energy for the bigger things."
To be fair, as a woman, MY definition and idea of a wingman was “backup.” As in, your buddy is chatting up a chick and when her overprotective friends step in, you as the wingman distract her friends by chatting them up so your buddy can close the deal and get the digits of the friend he’s interested in.
I think everyone sucks in that story as the girlfriend may have assumed that’s what it meant and the BF may have thought differently so her saying she was “okay” with it was she was cool with it by her own definition and her BF has the right to be annoyed and consider her as overreacting because he thought she was cool with it by his definition.
I think he’s right to be upset and feel lied to because she clearly wasn’t okay with what he considers to be a wingman and she clearly had no idea her bf thought that was how you wingman.
Yay, sanity!
Damn I’m so lucky. My boyfriend (now fiancé) always does little things for me, every day, I don’t even need to ask. Perhaps it helps that I do so too for him, it seems to be one of our love languages to do thoughtful little things. Laundry? He will come and help, kitchen? He says Health to your hand and cleans everything with me. Car? He goes around to open my door, even if it’s just a small drive to the market. I’m literally blessed 😅❤
Orange peel theory would destroy my relationship 😅
Story 1: Omg she should drop him
I lose interest in people who catch my eye the second I hear they are in relationship and would not be friends with anyone who would pine after / try to get with someone taken. I'm woman.
Agreed, don't put that bad juju on me Ricky Bobby!
"Thank you for showing a character flaw that will cause chaos in the lives of those who choose to associate with you. I'll see my way out".
10:54 - one time my ex got arrested and I was suspicious af so I looked through his phone and caught him cheating 😅
you guys are awesome
I would never do the orange peel theory test. Because I already know that whatever little task I'd ask my boyfriend to do, he'd do for me. And I know if do the exact same for him 💕
Now......my past relationship (ex fiancé)...99% chance he would not but I would for him. And I know that now 🤷🏽♀️
I think the orange peel thing is a good indicator to pay attention to how much you are willing to put up with and why. Investigate why you’re willing to accept breadcrumbs.
Orange peel theory. 20+ years ago my ex was a union painter & liked oranges. I peeled them for his lunch & put them in a ziplock baggie. His coworkers made fun up him. I embarrassed him. 😂
4:26 but it sounds like OP just wanted it up in a ponytail
For the “stopping” period I remember a lot of girls from my high school would eat lemon slices cause it stops it temporarily SUPPOSEDLY
A man being unwilling to buy his partner pad/tampons is a HUGE red flag. I remember being in middle school when my uncle told me something along those lines and honestly ot helped me to not be so embarrassed about buying them myself. Its a natural thing that we CAN NOT control and we have absolutely no reason to be embarrassed about it. My husband will biy me whatever i need and tries his hardest to get exactly what i ask for (i recently changed which brand i use) and i have a coworker who carries pads in his backpack for his daughters/wife. We cant help it and deal with all of the cramps and crappiness that comes with it the least our men can do is grow TF up and buy us what we need
Last story: What happens with future events? Is this her plan? to trade them out or only the first one that went to dinner and never included the other mom. No, this is more than a red flag!!! BEST SON EVER! THOSE TWO MOMS RAISED HIS INTO A GREAT HUMAN!!!
I think little acts of love are important. I show my love to my parents by giving them impromptu massages, pouring my dad wine while he’s watching tv, getting him a damp cloth when he sweats (he has a health problem) making my mom tea, asking h to em if thy eyes need anything. My parents do waaaayyy more than that for me. I’m not a very good daughter in comparison
I'm a 37 year old mom with five incredible kids, and a set of twins on the way. My husband works hard and is an amazing and loving dad, and coming from a fatherless home myself, I cherish this for my kids. He almost died in a car accident years ago, like inches away from death, because the car ended up smashing into him and wrecking him from the waist down, breaking his legs and pelvis in several places. So being a widow, or being left alone, is something I've thought about randomly because it did almost happen to me. If he calls me on his way to work or while driving it will actually give me anxiety because of the phone call he made to me after his wreck telling me he thought he was gonna die. I decided I would not marry or be in a relationship again until my kids were grown, if something were to happen to him. My kids are my most precious possessions and I would never jeopardize them by bringing a mistake of a man into their lives, after having such an amazing dad. Coming from an abusive home, with a stepdad who was physically and mentally abusive, and a mother who sat by and let it happen, that is my greatest fear about bringing someone else into my kids lives. I do not consider the man my mom married in any way as a father. I also know stepmoms can be absolutely toxic, so I've told my husband if he brings an abusive wretch into my kids lives, if I die, I will haunt him from the grave.
I started listening to this right after i got done grocery shopping. Before she was even done explaining the orange theory i had asked my husband to help me bring in the groceries and he put on his shoes to help. So i guess my husband passed the orange theory.
As for the marriage after the death of a spouse thing. My husband and I have actually had that conversation. And we both said that remarriage would 100% okay but neither of us are sure if we would. I did also say that if our children were still young when i died that it would still be okay if he remarried.
This one is odd to me, because I really don’t like “relationship tests” as a general rule - but thinking about it, my partner does small things for me that I could do myself as a way to show affection quite often. I do the same. I don’t think it’s a relationship ender by itself, but if it helps someone take a step back and examine things… maybe it’s helpful after all.
My husband used to put my shoes on for me, just because he wanted me to feel loved, he did it for months. It was so sweet, If I told him, "baby, I miss that, would you put my shoes on this week?" He would. Bc he loves me. He sees it as an act of love and sympathy. Ladies, I promise, this coming from an SA survivor, and a man hater, I believe there are good men out there. And they are looking for you as much as you are looking for them. I was in so many relationships, like the girl who tested her man with the orange peel theory, she can do better. Your man should want to do things to make your life easier, not always making your life harder. I've been with my husband for 6 years, married for a bit over a year, and we don't argue, we have problems like all couples, but he loves me and has so many ways to show me.
Asking a woman to hold it in is the equivalent to ask someone to stop bleeding after they've been stabbed, and yes we can squeeze it out, equivalent to flexing in the place you've been stabbed. Hope this helps lol
Literally all these people should break up. The guy who wanted her to stay single if he died has cult leader vibes. Like I could understand if they were teenagers because they're weird but, that's literally nuts.