This was a good documentary. Many thanks to the person who posted it. Jim and l were married for almost 33 years. We foolishly married on a whim and the first 15 years were rough, full of struggles, misunderstandings, turmoil, and hardships. The other 17 plus years, however, transitioned into something steady and enduring. We both became content, comfortable, and secure in our relationship and love for God and for one another. Even though cancer took him away from me, he is with me still, every minute of every day and night. Few have been able to understand the level of grief that hovers over me continually, except for my brother who lost his spouse 2 years before l lost mine. Both he and l have had to grieve alone, except that which we have shared with each other, as much as possible, our pain. I tried attending a grief class but found it made me feel worse, as having to deal with the grief of others in addition to my own devastation was even more tortuous than the solitary experience, so l never returned to the class. After a while, all of my friends stopped calling or trying to communicate with me, unable to deal with the level of my sorrow seeing that it lasted past the 6 months to 1 year mark that seems to represent the acceptable time for dealing with grief and moving on, at least in the minds of those who are unfamiliar with its realities. Many Christians mistakenly believe that simply by applying positive thinking, quoting certain scriptures and outright denial, one should be able to move forward quickly with great zeal and relish - on to greater heights, loftier goals and more exciting conquests than ever before known, as though the death of the one you loved was nothing more than a temporary steppingstone to some greater life previously unknown! 😑 Its been almost 2 yrs, and although l do not cry all day every day anymore and have returned to work and to functioning normally to the eyes of the casual observer……inside l am still like the walking dead 💀 I love the Lord. I pray a lot and read the bible. I talk to people, keep my grandkids, pay bills, buy groceries, help others as much as possible, blah blah blah, yet it is still with supreme effort that l am able to even enter the stage of life to perform the show. To me, absolutely nothing has either meaning or purpose. Even in a room full of people l feel completely alone. This video was helpful because it helped me realize that what l am going through is normal, seeing as how half of me has been permanently excised by death, never to return, thus leaving a tremendous amount of phantom pain to be dealt with. After all, for all practical purposes, l am an amputee! I gave birth to a full-term stillborn child once long ago and it was 2 years before l could talk about that without crying. Much to the chagrin of the unaffected, death is very painful and the pain of it must be adjusted to slowly because it is actually unnatural. People say death is just a natural part of life but l believe that originally God created us as immortals, yet because of sin we now have death to deal with - as the creature in the garden said to Eve, Surely You Will Not Die, Will You? Yes, absolutely, because of sin the world is plagued with separation, death, and many other very bad things. So, my eternal hope is not in this life but in the next one - the real, eternal and everlasting one! That fact is what gets me through each minute. Not other people, not temporary distractions, and not even by changing the circumstances and situations of my life in some lame attempt to make myself feel better. No, there is no point to placing band-aids on gaping wounds! All that gets me through this gut-wrenching grief is the constant comfort of the Holy Spirit and knowing that something better awaits beyond this mortal veil. In the meantime, it certainly increases my compassion (2 Cor 1:6) for others and has totally squelched any desire for me to offer any platitudes or shallow advice to others who are grieving. So, if nothing else is gained by my sorrow but this, l will consider obtaining that kind wisdom to be a most excellent gift from the Lord. As was stated in this video - there are no pat answers, so l will end by saying, many blessings to all others who are grieving and l pray sincerely that you may also be comforted by the Holy Spirit. 🙏🌻
Your words touched my heart on so many levels... for this I am truly thankful. Grief has so many mysteries, that you can't begin to figure out. They are in constant change. I know that your words were meant for me. This by far has been the roughest journey of my life. My beloved died suddenly, no goodbyes, no nothing...so much to handle in the delirium, he took care of so much that I didn't have to be worried with. Now ALL falls on my shoulder. I am so numb, and in such a fog. If it had not been my faith, I would not even be here now. I liken it to a woman in travail, with all the pain. But what I hold on to there is an expected end... My God continue to stay with you and the Holy Spirit guide and comfort you on your journey!!! Thank you for sharing...
My husband died suddenly at work thirty years ago this month. I was 30, he was 35, we’d been married 10 years. We had 3 small children. It’s a day that is never forgotten. Even now, it’ll still catch me off guard and I’m in tears. I’m sorry for your loss, and anyone grieving. It’s the most painful thing. He was a Christian, so am I , so I know I’ll see him soon. God NEVER meant us to have to deal with this. We aren’t capable of understanding it nor enduring it. The wound heals over, the scar remains.Sin brought separation from God. For those who don’t know, Jesus came to be that bridge between God and man. Through repentance for our sins, and faith in Jesus we can rejoin them in heaven if they’ve accepted Christ too!
My single mum passed away when I was 7 months pregnant with my first child. The funeral was excruciating but turned out to be a bit of a full stop to my grief until all my children left home and then the grief returned, and it still visits my occasionally. It can be tough. God was always good.
I lost my beloved husband of 32 years 6/29/22. He was my best friend and soul mate. He fought cancer for 2 years and we knew God as going o take him home but it was still such a shock even though I knew it was coming. My grief is so hard. Some days it’s hard to even get out of bed but the world does not stop so I get up and go through the day. I will never get over it but God will get me through it.❤️✝️💔 I am forever changed.
May God left up your burdens May give you peace that surpass all understand, May God give you joy in moments of sadness, May give you strength to move on
C Delaney, I am so sorry for your loss. My husband went home to the Lord 23 years ago after 31 years of marriage and it still hurts. I will be praying for you and although you never get "over" it, you do move forward and get through it, remembering with less pain. God loves us far too much than to leave us in the pit of grief. I'm happy to hear you're trusting Him and my advice to you is to draw near to Him and He will draw near to you. May your hope and your joy rest in Jesus, our Prince of Peace. He has promised us an eternity with HIm and our loved ones. John 11:26
@@CalvaryChapelGal I came across your comment at the grief of love ones post here on UA-cam. ☹️That’s so touching and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all loss our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I truly understand how you feel cos I’ve felt same hard and terrible experiences before but death is just inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday, and every of our love ones we’ve loss will always want to see us happy again wherever they’re okay. I loss my oldest daughter Annabel February 24th 2020 in a crucial car accident, and she just turned 22 on her last birthday before she got knocked down by a moving vehicle 🚗 and so unlucky for me that horrible day the driver was drunk. That was the worst and most lamenting day of my whole life as a single Dad raising two kid's, my 17 years old son Clark and my 4 legged 🐶 families are my everything and the reason I still keep strong, and keep going! My late wife passed away three years ago from a shocking disease, I felt devastated with grief, and I was so heartbroken 💔 but God and time are indeed the best healers. Hope you’ve found peace, comfort and happiness again?
@@richardmcguinn732 How kind of you to respond to me Richard. First I want to say how sorry I am for the loss of your precious daughter Annabel and your wife. I pray you know that they are not "lost." They are safe in the arms of our heavenly Father. There will be a reunion! Jesus secured that for us. ✝ Thanks for your kind words and yes, I have found peace, that peace of God which passes all understanding. He has certainly blessed me over these last 23 years with far more than I deserve and the best part is that my pain wasn't wasted. He used that pain to help others as I humbly get to serve Him. God's loving kindness is amazing! Merry Christmas and may God bless you, Clark, and your four legged kids. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. James 4:8
There are many kinds of grief that do not involve death. So many ways to lose someone. I agree, that grief can feel like fear. You have to find a way to function and live. Knowing God is key.
I lost my wife my best friend my everything to cervical cancer on 04/06/22. It's so freakin difficult to even attempt to grasp this. I feel like it's betrayal to go forward without her. I know she's not coming back but my mind heart and soul will not allow me to accept it. She's not just a phase in my life she is so much more than that. How do you live your life without your life. I don't know, too many emotions to sort out. Thanks for the video.. I miss you so much I miss you so bad!! I love you I need you babe!!
Loss my beloved adopted mom right before Christmas which brought me to this documentary. It’s been one of the most difficult if not devastating losses I could’ve endured and I have had a lot of loss.😥😔😥 My biological dad, my paternal grandma, four adopted aunts in the year of 2018. Along with two friends in the last five years, being parentless, let alone the loneliness that comes with this magnitude of so much loss really still knocks the wind out of me. Shaking me to the core, I’ve even questioned my life wondering if I’m even needed here on this earth. Feeling abandoned even by God when there is no answers, to the questions I have in this life. Why so much loss, why me, it’s just very difficult if only I could have a phone call with my mom let alone see and feel her. She is the mother I never had, just hurts, grief really hurts...💔😢💔
I feel your pain. Lost my sweet mother and found a second reading of “A Grief Observed” helped so much. I now praise God that my mother is in a safe place and happy. I wouldn’t call her back for anything and know I will see her again. (Edit: changed "do" to "so")
Me (Otessa) widow of my husband (Robert). I lost my husband on 07 September 2022. When his heart stopped beating, my heart stopped beating along with his.
I came across your comment at the grief of love ones post here on UA-cam. ☹️That’s so touching and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all loss our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I truly understand how you feel cos I’ve felt same hard and terrible experiences before but death is just inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday, and every of our love ones we’ve loss will always want to see us happy again wherever they’re okay. I loss my oldest daughter Annabel February 24th 2020 in a crucial car accident, and she just turned 22 on her last birthday before she got knocked down by a moving vehicle 🚗 and so unlucky for me that horrible day the driver was drunk. That was the worst and most lamenting day of my whole life as a single Dad raising two kid's, my 17 years old son Clark and my 4 legged 🐶 families are my everything and the reason I still keep strong, and keep going! My late wife passed away three years ago from a shocking disease, I felt devastated with grief, and I was so heartbroken 💔 but God and time are indeed the best healers. Hope you’ve found peace, comfort and happiness again?
That first woman's mother, of 10, murdered! That's unimaginable. I'm coping with the loss of someone to drugs. Maybe I'm just realising the closeness, but I'm really feeling it right now. I had lots of deaths, many close. My brother died at 38. Never easy. I have tools though, faith in God, friends in church, in AA. It can be made harder by the circumstances surrounding the loss, younger age, drug abuse, if it was a suicide. I knew someone who was murdered but having a parent or anybody that close,murdered of all things, the rage that that lady and their family must have felt. Many questions why and what trifling person who don't care if you somebody's mama or somebody's daddy, would ever. I've got no kids. I know people who lost children. That's something to pray for people going through losses. You can be pissed off all you want at a murderer, but I pray for murderers too, and for those so affected to find forgiveness, so they can realise closure. I heard of people saying get over it and I'm like you don't get over it. Closure don't mean get over it. Rather one moves forward in a way that continues to honour the memory and legacy of the departed. But it takes time. Go through whatever emotions as you process it. There's no set time. But allow yourself to go through it and don't be ashamed if you're still struggling years later and don't be ashamed to reach out for help neither. But do your grief in a healthy way.
Life is about helping people and loving God. The greatest commandment is to love God with all your hearth, mind, soul and strength. Second is to love your neighbour as you love yourself. *Mark 12:28-31* The Greatest Commandment 28 One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?” 29 “The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.[a] 30 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’[b] 31 The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[c] There is no commandment greater than these.”
This was a good documentary. Many thanks to the person who posted it.
Jim and l were married for almost 33 years. We foolishly married on a whim and the first 15 years were rough, full of struggles, misunderstandings, turmoil, and hardships. The other 17 plus years, however, transitioned into something steady and enduring. We both became content, comfortable, and secure in our relationship and love for God and for one another. Even though cancer took him away from me, he is with me still, every minute of every day and night. Few have been able to understand the level of grief that hovers over me continually, except for my brother who lost his spouse 2 years before l lost mine. Both he and l have had to grieve alone, except that which we have shared with each other, as much as possible, our pain. I tried attending a grief class but found it made me feel worse, as having to deal with the grief of others in addition to my own devastation was even more tortuous than the solitary experience, so l never returned to the class.
After a while, all of my friends stopped calling or trying to communicate with me, unable to deal with the level of my sorrow seeing that it lasted past the 6 months to 1 year mark that seems to represent the acceptable time for dealing with grief and moving on, at least in the minds of those who are unfamiliar with its realities.
Many Christians mistakenly believe that simply by applying positive thinking, quoting certain scriptures and outright denial, one should be able to move forward quickly with great zeal and relish - on to greater heights, loftier goals and more exciting conquests than ever before known, as though the death of the one you loved was nothing more than a temporary steppingstone to some greater life previously unknown! 😑
Its been almost 2 yrs, and although l do not cry all day every day anymore and have returned to work and to functioning normally to the eyes of the casual observer……inside l am still like the walking dead 💀
I love the Lord. I pray a lot and read the bible.
I talk to people, keep my grandkids, pay bills, buy groceries, help others as much as possible, blah blah blah, yet it is still with supreme effort that l am able to even enter the stage of life to perform the show. To me, absolutely nothing has either meaning or purpose. Even in a room full of people l feel completely alone.
This video was helpful because it helped me realize that what l am going through is normal, seeing as how half of me has been permanently excised by death, never to return, thus leaving a tremendous amount of phantom pain to be dealt with. After all, for all practical purposes, l am an amputee!
I gave birth to a full-term stillborn child once long ago and it was 2 years before l could talk about that without crying. Much to the chagrin of the unaffected, death is very painful and the pain of it must be adjusted to slowly because it is actually unnatural. People say death is just a natural part of life but l believe that originally God created us as immortals, yet because of sin we now have death to deal with - as the creature in the garden said to Eve, Surely You Will Not Die, Will You? Yes, absolutely, because of sin the world is plagued with separation, death, and many other very bad things. So, my eternal hope is not in this life but in the next one - the real, eternal and everlasting one! That fact is what gets me through each minute. Not other people, not temporary distractions, and not even by changing the circumstances and situations of my life in some lame attempt to make myself feel better. No, there is no point to placing band-aids on gaping wounds!
All that gets me through this gut-wrenching grief is the constant comfort of the Holy Spirit and knowing that something better awaits beyond this mortal veil. In the meantime, it certainly increases my compassion (2 Cor 1:6) for others and has totally squelched any desire for me to offer any platitudes or shallow advice to others who are grieving. So, if nothing else is gained by my sorrow but this, l will consider obtaining that kind wisdom to be a most excellent gift from the Lord.
As was stated in this video - there are no pat answers, so l will end by saying, many blessings to all others who are grieving and l pray sincerely that you may also be comforted by the Holy Spirit. 🙏🌻
Your words touched my heart on so many levels... for this I am truly thankful. Grief has so many mysteries, that you can't begin to figure out. They are in constant change. I know that your words were meant for me. This by far has been the roughest journey of my life. My beloved died suddenly, no goodbyes, no nothing...so much to handle in the delirium, he took care of so much that I didn't have to be worried with. Now ALL falls on my shoulder. I am so numb, and in such a fog. If it had not been my faith, I would not even be here now. I liken it to a woman in travail, with all the pain. But what I hold on to there is an expected end... My God continue to stay with you and the Holy Spirit guide and comfort you on your journey!!! Thank you for sharing...
My husband died suddenly at work thirty years ago this month. I was 30, he was 35, we’d been married 10 years. We had 3 small children. It’s a day that is never forgotten. Even now, it’ll still catch me off guard and I’m in tears. I’m sorry for your loss, and anyone grieving. It’s the most painful thing. He was a Christian, so am I , so I know I’ll see him soon. God NEVER meant us to have to deal with this. We aren’t capable of understanding it nor enduring it. The wound heals over, the scar remains.Sin brought separation from God. For those who don’t know, Jesus came to be that bridge between God and man. Through repentance for our sins, and faith in Jesus we can rejoin them in heaven if they’ve accepted Christ too!
Lost my son 8 months ago. I can’t even begin to describe the pain and confusion.
Prayers for all here
They are forever ours and loved
✝️🕊🙏🏽💙
My single mum passed away when I was 7 months pregnant with my first child. The funeral was excruciating but turned out to be a bit of a full stop to my grief until all my children left home and then the grief returned, and it still visits my occasionally. It can be tough. God was always good.
I lost my beloved husband of 32 years 6/29/22. He was my best friend and soul mate. He fought cancer for 2 years and we knew God as going o take him home but it was still such a shock even though I knew it was coming. My grief is so hard. Some days it’s hard to even get out of bed but the world does not stop so I get up and go through the day. I will never get over it but God will get me through it.❤️✝️💔 I am forever changed.
May God left up your burdens May give you peace that surpass all understand, May God give you joy in moments of sadness, May give you strength to move on
C Delaney, I am so sorry for your loss. My husband went home to the Lord 23 years ago after 31 years of marriage and it still hurts. I will be praying for you and although you never get "over" it, you do move forward and get through it, remembering with less pain. God loves us far too much than to leave us in the pit of grief. I'm happy to hear you're trusting Him and my advice to you is to draw near to Him and He will draw near to you. May your hope and your joy rest in Jesus, our Prince of Peace. He has promised us an eternity with HIm and our loved ones. John 11:26
@@CalvaryChapelGal I came across your comment at the grief of love ones post here on UA-cam. ☹️That’s so touching and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all loss our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I truly understand how you feel cos I’ve felt same hard and terrible experiences before but death is just inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday, and every of our love ones we’ve loss will always want to see us happy again wherever they’re okay. I loss my oldest daughter Annabel February 24th 2020 in a crucial car accident, and she just turned 22 on her last birthday before she got knocked down by a moving vehicle 🚗 and so unlucky for me that horrible day the driver was drunk. That was the worst and most lamenting day of my whole life as a single Dad raising two kid's, my 17 years old son Clark and my 4 legged 🐶 families are my everything and the reason I still keep strong, and keep going! My late wife passed away three years ago from a shocking disease, I felt devastated with grief, and I was so heartbroken 💔 but God and time are indeed the best healers. Hope you’ve found peace, comfort and happiness again?
@@richardmcguinn732 How kind of you to respond to me Richard. First I want to say how sorry I am for the loss of your precious daughter Annabel and your wife. I pray you know that they are not "lost." They are safe in the arms of our heavenly Father. There will be a reunion! Jesus secured that for us. ✝ Thanks for your kind words and yes, I have found peace, that peace of God which passes all understanding. He has certainly blessed me over these last 23 years with far more than I deserve and the best part is that my pain wasn't wasted. He used that pain to help others as I humbly get to serve Him. God's loving kindness is amazing! Merry Christmas and may God bless you, Clark, and your four legged kids. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. James 4:8
There are many kinds of grief that do not involve death. So many ways to lose someone. I agree, that grief can feel like fear. You have to find a way to function and live. Knowing God is key.
I lost my wife my best friend my everything to cervical cancer on 04/06/22. It's so freakin difficult to even attempt to grasp this. I feel like it's betrayal to go forward without her. I know she's not coming back but my mind heart and soul will not allow me to accept it. She's not just a phase in my life she is so much more than that. How do you live your life without your life. I don't know, too many emotions to sort out. Thanks for the video.. I miss you so much I miss you so bad!! I love you I need you babe!!
Loss my beloved adopted mom right before Christmas which brought me to this documentary. It’s been one of the most difficult if not devastating losses I could’ve endured and I have had a lot of loss.😥😔😥 My biological dad, my paternal grandma, four adopted aunts in the year of 2018. Along with two friends in the last five years, being parentless, let alone the loneliness that comes with this magnitude of so much loss really still knocks the wind out of me. Shaking me to the core, I’ve even questioned my life wondering if I’m even needed here on this earth. Feeling abandoned even by God when there is no answers, to the questions I have in this life. Why so much loss, why me, it’s just very difficult if only I could have a phone call with my mom let alone see and feel her. She is the mother I never had, just hurts, grief really hurts...💔😢💔
I feel your pain. Lost my sweet mother and found a second reading of “A Grief Observed” helped so much. I now praise God that my mother is in a safe place and happy. I wouldn’t call her back for anything and know I will see her again. (Edit: changed "do" to "so")
@@annchovey2089 I loss my mother too in August 2022_😥
@@shemoraqueen I'm so sorry. The first Mother's Day without her was the hardest for me; even harder than her birthday.
I love you all
❤
❤️ this 👏🏻 hallelujah praise my Heavenly Father The Lord God Almighty who’s helped me through so much pain 😢& heartache
Me (Otessa) widow of my husband (Robert). I lost my husband on 07 September 2022. When his heart stopped beating, my heart stopped beating along with his.
I came across your comment at the grief of love ones post here on UA-cam. ☹️That’s so touching and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all loss our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I truly understand how you feel cos I’ve felt same hard and terrible experiences before but death is just inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday, and every of our love ones we’ve loss will always want to see us happy again wherever they’re okay. I loss my oldest daughter Annabel February 24th 2020 in a crucial car accident, and she just turned 22 on her last birthday before she got knocked down by a moving vehicle 🚗 and so unlucky for me that horrible day the driver was drunk. That was the worst and most lamenting day of my whole life as a single Dad raising two kid's, my 17 years old son Clark and my 4 legged 🐶 families are my everything and the reason I still keep strong, and keep going! My late wife passed away three years ago from a shocking disease, I felt devastated with grief, and I was so heartbroken 💔 but God and time are indeed the best healers. Hope you’ve found peace, comfort and happiness again?
Praise Him for the raisen
Through out this video I am constantly reminded of how Jesus must have felt God bolted the door against him.
That first woman's mother, of 10, murdered! That's unimaginable. I'm coping with the loss of someone to drugs. Maybe I'm just realising the closeness, but I'm really feeling it right now. I had lots of deaths, many close. My brother died at 38. Never easy. I have tools though, faith in God, friends in church, in AA. It can be made harder by the circumstances surrounding the loss, younger age, drug abuse, if it was a suicide. I knew someone who was murdered but having a parent or anybody that close,murdered of all things, the rage that that lady and their family must have felt. Many questions why and what trifling person who don't care if you somebody's mama or somebody's daddy, would ever. I've got no kids. I know people who lost children. That's something to pray for people going through losses. You can be pissed off all you want at a murderer, but I pray for murderers too, and for those so affected to find forgiveness, so they can realise closure. I heard of people saying get over it and I'm like you don't get over it. Closure don't mean get over it. Rather one moves forward in a way that continues to honour the memory and legacy of the departed. But it takes time. Go through whatever emotions as you process it. There's no set time. But allow yourself to go through it and don't be ashamed if you're still struggling years later and don't be ashamed to reach out for help neither. But do your grief in a healthy way.
There is a Languor of the Life
More imminent than Pain-
’Tis Pain’s Successor-When the Soul
Has suffered all it can...- Emily Dickinson
Life is about helping people and loving God.
The greatest commandment is to love God with all your hearth, mind, soul and strength.
Second is to love your neighbour as you love yourself.
*Mark 12:28-31*
The Greatest Commandment
28 One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?”
29 “The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.[a] 30 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’[b] 31 The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[c] There is no commandment greater than these.”