"How People Are Aging Is None of Our Business" Says the _gorgeous_ creator, that doesn't seem to ever age. 😂😂 Sorry, I just _had_ to poke fun. XO Lighting is GOD, to anyone in front of a camera in 2023! If you don't have perfect light & know your angles you can age yourself 10 yrs. THAT'S okay though!
@KarolinaZebrowskax , you are 100% correct on this. I find it so disgusting when there are these people in their ages of 40s, 50s, 60s, and 70s still acting like they are cliquish snob 10-year-old brats by judging people's appearance. And these people don't even realize how disgusting they are.
People: "I don't understand why so many people in Hollywood get plastic surgery and Botox." Also people: *Sees one wrinkle. "Oh wow, they let themselves go! She's so old now."
I grew up just a little bit away from Hollywood and some of the local news stations would report on female actresses getting 'work' done. To the point of having photographers hiding is bushes and such to get a picture. And god help them if the didn't have work done. And if any actor committed the cardinal sin of getting older and looking it...they were fodder for running mouths.
As much as I want to judge the beauty standards that society puts onto us, I never, ever, ever want to judge any individual for wanting to get plastic surgery. It’s not an easy thing to live in this world of Instagram and zoom meeting image distortion. ❤❤
Im 53, Ive nearly died so many times, I was once pronounced dead at the scene and put in a body bag...!!! I love getting old - it beats being dead cos being dead is astonishingly boring...
The Pamela Anderson thing is especially illustrative because she has said that after her beloved long-time make up artist died of breast cancer recently, she decided she just wouldn't wear make up anymore because there's no point now. The fact that the media made a whole story out of it and kind of pushed her to disclose something so personal and potentially painful - something that is NONE OF ANYBODY'S BUSINESS - really shows how bizarre it is that we scrutinize people's looks and personal choices so much and so publicly.
For anyone growing up with Bay Watch, who would have thought Pamela Anderson would have both a fair measure of intelligence and decency? My hat off to her for standing up for her friends memory.
@@p.bckman2997 I grew up on Baywatch too and I don't understand why it's such a shock to you? Were you expecting her to be stupid and indecent or something lol?
honestly the fact that she doesnt wear makeup anymore is probably great for her skin as she gets older, might actually help her keep it healthy for longer.
@@sabrinagranger5468, I guess you're right. She played the dumb bimbo really well. I've seen a few statements from her these later years, and she seems like a genuinely decent and sensible person, unlike many celebrities.
I think part of the negative response is people trying to "other" aging in order to deal with their own fears of aging. By treating aging as something you can do wrong you can convince yourself that you will do it right, that you don't have to worry about society treating you like it treats everyone else when you get old. It's kinda like how people will victim blame to convince themselves that bad things only happen to you if you let them.
Women literally can't win. "She should just age gracefully!" vs. "Why did she let herself go?" An interesting consequence of this is some movie directors say they struggle to find people for historical movies, because everyone has had work done that wouldn't look right in the historical setting. Which breaks my heart cause I love period pieces, but how do you do them if everyone has "21st century face"?
But also is interesting how Hollywood itself is contributing so much to this problem. The way that main female roles only center young women or women that look very young despite the actual character's age, not only leaving more mature looking actress with much less opportunities but also creating more pressure on young actresses to do something to maintain their youthful appearance in order to preserve their careers. On the other hand, older actors are frequently casted for characters that are main to be way younger than their real age. See recent Napoleon's cast: he's able to play the character at the beginning when he's supposed to be a young man while being in I don't know, his fifties? an zero characterization or special effects, while the actress for Josephine is way younger and they "age" her with makeup at the end of the movie.
What they're actually having a hard time finding is people who are old, but still youthful in appearance. Not wrinkly, but not with plastic surgery or botox. They want people who simply don't exist. I would say there are some people that match that description out there, but not a lot. It's unattainable for most of us.
@@dannahbanana11235yeah, finding a person who is aging beautifully AND is an actor AND is interested in playing the role X when the Holywood is that kind of place with that stressful lifestyle that tends to burn and thus age people faster on average must be real hard. Geee, i wonder why
I just watched Gilded Age and the difference between older women in this TV show comparing to Downton Abbey is astonishing! In Downton Abbey there are very good looking older women with wrinkles vs. Gilded Age - there in none single wrinkle in the whole saga! Only the neck of older characters can make you guess the actual age of the characters/actors. Lots of botox and facelifting on every women there and it is supposed to be the end of the 19th century. It is really sad where the standards in Holywood had shifted.
The “men are maturing vs. women are getting old”- that is absolutely the (messed up) perception being perpetuated!! You nailed it. It’s such a brutal double standard. Thank you for this video. ♡
There's a quote from a Czech director (female). Who said (and I'm paraphrasing): "Men are made prettier by their grey hair, they mature with age and one day, they suddenly...perish"
In regards to aging and weight gain: I’m 32 and I’ve always been overweight. Sure I’ve gained 30lbs since high school but since I’ve always been “the fat one” everyone tells me “Omg you haven’t changed a bit!”. Meanwhile, my poor sister went from skinny to my size and well…people are much less kind about it. We are literally the same size, but since I match people’s memory of me, I’m praised while she’s judged for daring to look different.
I feel you so much girl. I’m 30 and recently lost 100 pounds. My sister (2 years younger) used to look like my clone until I gained weight and then we no longer looked alike. But then she gained a bit of weight and I lost and suddenly we look like twins again. It’s very awkward. And it’s like, at any size, we’re just people. ❤❤
The opposite is true as well, I used to be very obese as a teenager and I lost 70 lbs and even tho I'm nowhere near thin (I'm actually still overweight bmi wise) many people call me thin or have even expressed concern that I am too thin. I always found it odd until I realized that they remember me much bigger and so the difference is shocking to them because they don't see me everyday like I see myself everyday.
@@MrVinceMunro True. As much as I agree with the original poster, I dread the day I start aging. I'm only 29 now, but the dread is ingrained into me. More so because when you get older, there's the whole thing about dealing with health problems, ect.
This reminds me of a story about a woman running a cooking channel on facebook. She was 31 years old and had a decent amount of grey hair. She kept getting hate comments about looking ''like an old hag'' and how she should dye her hair. Turns out she was terminally ill and she knew she would likely not live to 70 years old. Grey hair reminded her she was still alive and her husband wanted her to keep the grey hair so they could grow old together. A male host would not get such comments, and she had to come out with her personall stuff to explain her grey hair. It's like we can only accept signs of aging if we have a proper excuse for it. You can't just AGE because it's a human thing we all go through. You have to have a proper excuse for looking old, but even then it can be not enough because ''well, you're rich, do somthing about it''.
There seems to be a lot of hatred to grey hair. After I got sick, I decided I would not dye my hair anymore. It’s like a female tax of sorts. A lot of women spend about 100-200 dollars per month to get their roots dyed after their hair is dyed. They also paint their fingernails and toenails. God help them if they don’t “keep themselves”. Yet men are allowed to go grey naturally, and they don’t have to do the makeup/hair and nails routine It’s just that people have a strange ask of women - stay young.
That’s awful that she had to deal with those sorts of comments, as if she didn’t have enough going on. ☹️ It’s totally normal to start getting some gray hair in your 30s (probably not a lot, but some). Heck, I knew a healthy guy who started going bald in his early 20s-he just had a genetic predisposition to going bald young.
I've had some grey hair since 15 and literally nobody has ever cared. Not a single soul alive ever cared. This must be an American story. Europe is chill.
@@BlackSeranna yeap I agree. Yet some people bleach their hair... then tone it grey, and get praise and compliments for how amazing their hair looks. When it is artificial! Yet naturally "greying" is shamed. Ahhhgrrrrr 🤦♀️ Humans have the most frustrating illogical thoughts and behaviours, love to contradict themselves. It's infuriating and saddening. 😭
Honestly, Bonnie looks refreshing in the sea of all the celebrities getting the same cosmetic procedures and becoming straight up copies of each other. Have you noticed that celebrities' faces get more and more similar these days? It's so nice to see a regular woman in her thirties, who is still goddamn beautiful, and simply looks her age. It helps me to set expectations for myself in the future instead of comparing myself to multiple walking advertisements of plastic surgeries
You don’t have to take a swipe at women that do get work done and say they all look the same to make your point. Not shitting on women for getting work is also part of accepting women looking how ever they look. Don’t shit on ladies with surgery because it’s just as shitty as crapping on women who don’t. Misogyny is a double edged sword of damned if you do damned if you don’t.. so don’t be the ass on the other side of the equation.
But they DO look f*ing awful. That trend needs to stop. I think it is ok to point it out since it seems to be the only thing you see with stars these days.
@@bitchywomanIt's not misogyny to note that the trends in plastic surgery do make many women look similar; the plastic surgery culture and pressure to have our faces and bodies conform to trends is what is in fact misogyny in action. It's possible to regret this evolution and to see it becoming sadly more and more prevalent without judging the individual women who have had work done. If we can't comment on anything in our culture that pressures women to literally hurt themselves to conform to completely unattainable beauty standards because it's supposedly misogynistic to talk about any choices women have made in a negative way, then we literally can't criticise anything in our culture. It's not a good thing that people feel so much pressure to look young or different that they willingly have knives put to their face and it's not misogyny to point out that this culture reduces all, but most often women's bodies and faces to objects that should conform to what's fashionable at that moment.
hard disagree, she is too lazy to wear SPF and looks haggard I'm slightly older than her and everyone I know looks younger than her. Even the smokers. She has the budget, she can afford SPF50.
I used to be a very heavy drug user all throughout my 20s. I turn 36 in 4 days, and the fact that I am even alive to say this is a blessing. So I wear my wrinkles and aging face as a badge of honor, cuz it is truly a miracle I am even here to get them.
I hope you will have a wonderful birthday 🎉🎉🎉 I’m 36 too and was also at a point in my 20s where I didn’t think I’d make it. So here’s to each and every year we age and the signs of it that follow 🎉🎉🎉
I almost lost my life to suicide -compounded by "self soothing" with drugs. I've decided to, after getting PhD, to become a doctor and thus study with people 15 years junior, from different backgrounds and much wealthier families to boot. It's difficult, with how much people are obsessed with appearance, with how important it seems but I hope to be able to have a little bit of positive influence on my surroundings. I hope that if we all teach the people around us to be kinder to eachother,the media - run by those same people,yes, but with financial incentives to push products and procedures - will at least somewhat follow.
Years ago, I initiated this rule for myself when commenting, posting, whatever. Never talk about someone’s looks unless asked for. Frankly even if it’s a compliment, no. My opinion on how someone looks is completely irrelevant and I have NO idea what might be triggering to someone else. Talk about people’s work or their words. Not their looks.
My rule for commenting on appearances is - compliment something they have control over. "I love your nail color!" is much more polite than "you have beautiful eyes." Also, only mention something "wrong" if they can fix it easily. "Oh, your tag is sticking out" is fine, but "there's a stain on the back of your shirt" is rude. Simply holding your tongue and minding your business is a perfectly good strategy too lol
it depends though, if your hanging at a friends house and notice there is a stain on his shirt, might be wise to mention it so he could change Or offer to lend him a jacket@@tensegemstone1394
LOVE that. And I am fine giving my honest opinion on a politically conservative blogger or something like that. But it helps to focus on actions or content. ❤❤
The timing of this video is so spot on, because just 30 minutes ago I was watching a youtube reel with Emilia Clarke and thinking about this exact issue. Every time I watch a video with her there's so many people leaving absolutely nasty comments about how old she looks and it just infuriates me. She was 25 when GOT premiered and now she's nearing 40, of course she's going to look different. She's aging just like any other person and it really bothers me that people won't leave her be and keep those terrible comments to themselves.
While that is valid I had no idea GOT came out that long ago because I have no sense of time passing 😂😀 so I might have been surprised to see her change, just because I wouldn't have realized that time has passed ..
Some people are just so hateful and miserable. Emilia Clarke is absolutely stunning no matter how old she is. I love how she embraces being her natural self, she's genuine and seems like a lovely person. 🥲
Aging also means accountability. I think so many people have observed the trend of some influencer being forgiven their mistakes/misdeeds because 'they're young, they don't know any better' and once you're in your thirties, that grace period is over, people expect you to know what you're doing.
The idea that people all age at different rates is so important. My partner has had grey streaks in her hair since her early 20s. She's had the beginnings of laugh lines and wrinkles around her eyes since her mid 20s. She's generally not felt self conscious about it thankfully because this is the norm in her family. I'm still getting acne and given my family history I likely won't see a ton of signs of aging for a while - but I know it's coming. Seeing my partner embrace her aging has definitely reaffirmed in me my desire to buck my family's trend of bemoaning their signs of aging. There's also this idea that the reason we clamor for aging men and discard aging women is because with age often comes increased access, wisdom, and power. A women getting more of those is threatening to people rather than sexy because societally we sexualize female vulnerability and availability. It's funny though because those same women who get discarded by mainstream outlets become icons in queer communities precisely because of those reasons.
@K.C-2049 Same here. As a fellow straight white girl, she's possibly the only woman I've ever looked at and genuinely thought, "she's sexy", but in a nice way, you know? Specifically her 'When You're Good to Mama' number in the Chicago movie musical
Every time i get anxious about aging, i remember that I'm almost the same age my dad was when he died. I've had friends and family that died when they were younger than me. Getting old is a privilege.
I feel the same way. My older brother died at the age of 22. He would be 30 this year. It is jolting to think that I outlived him by over 1/3 of the time he was alive. I would love to see him with greying hair, a receding hairline, and all the hallmarks of getting old. It is indeed a privilege to age and not be a young memory in a photograph
Exactly! I'm 42 now and some of the people I went to uni with have already died. I love my life as it is right now. Getting old is an absolute privilege. And as an added bonus, I've found that the older I get, the less I care about other people's opinions about the way I look, how I choose to spend my money, what I wear or what kind of music I like. It takes away soo much pressure!
As someone that never expected to live to 18 but is now 32 I gotta say I take ageing as a beautiful journey. I'm excited to be in my 30s. I can't wait to be in my 40s and so on. Every birthday is something to be thrilled over. I also weigh more now than I ever have and it's not the end of the world. I do still have a youthful face, but honestly I always hated that because people would treat me like a child (some still do). Wrinkles, weight, grey hair, scars, stretch marks...it's all just part of the story.
I think exactly like you. I get excited when I see signs of ageing in myself, I love to see how I changed. I despised being a kid and a teen, so to me looking older is looking happier
@@alexterieur8813 It's not a huge one moment change but a series of smaller changes over time that really help with gaining security in self. Try starting with body neutrality (I am content with my body instead of forcing I love my body)
Carrie Fisher once said “men are *allowed* to age.” Remember how often many men are still praised as attractive even when they’re old compared to what we've all heard about old women.
Women only find about 20% of men to be physically attractive. Those same men tend to remain attractive as they age. Unattractive men remain unattractive as they age. This is how women see it. Thankfully most women find men attractive in other ways than simply the physical. Otoh, men see about 80% of young women as attractive. As women age, they become less physically attractive to men. These are both biological realities that neither men nor women truly choose, and this is probably based on mating potential. Women tend to be most able to have children when they are younger whereas a man can become a father at a much higher age. This set up is unfair to both men and women in certain ways, but it is based on biological urges and instinct. Picking on women because they look older is shallow and I would never do that. At the same time, the feeling that a woman is or is not attractive is depressingly tied to how old she looks. I don't like this reality but it is a reality.
@@therealuncleowen2588 A man's personality, personal hygiene, general habits, and his value system are 90-99.9% of what determines a man's overall attractiveness. His outer appearance may catch the eye, but everything else about him is usually what eliminates him from someone else's consideration. As for biology, if that were the only real motivation, pregnancy, birth, and 20+ years of childrearing are far too costly and high risk to spend and waste all those resources on just anyone. That's just reality.
I think there could also be an element here of people hating to see their own aging reflected back at them. They remember these people being young when they were young and, when they see these actresses aged, they are forced to confront (deep down) the fact that they have also aged. That makes them feel dysphoric and they project it outwardly. Also, while women certainly receive the brunt of this, I disagree that it doesn't impact men as well. Other child actors, like Macaulay Culkin, have also struggled with judgment and scrutiny as they exist in the public eye as adults. As a society, we've learned to express our own dissatisfaction with ourselves through these celebrity "proxies" and it's become a way for us to avoid processing these emotions. If we can develop true empathy for ourselves, then we can also better accept the others around us.
It does impact men too, but on a MUCH lesser scale than women. Famous men get the odd derisive tabloid article, women literally get sh*t on on the regular, any kind of woman, famous or not.
One actor quit being James bond because he thought it was disgusting to have to make out with women the age of his granddaughter. Because old men with power and money are not "old" in societies eyes.
Im 34 and wish I had aged as beautifully as Bonnie Wright. But also I'm not torn up about it lmao. I always felt so bad for her in the HP days because she was always compared with Emma Watson and Harry/Hermione shippers would come for her. Give this woman a break.
Without knowing much about you, it's possible that your 57 year old self would regret you not documenting yourself as you are right now. I think you look great... but who cares what I think. I look back at photos of myself in my 30's and wish I had more. For what it's worth, I think you look great right now. Edit: I look ok right now. Nothing scary happened.. :) But my 34 year old self.. sigh..
I'm also 34 and I don't get people's sh*talking Bonnie... And also Pamela looks amazing. It's insane to me how people feel invested in women's aging process :/
They don't take it personal. They just use their freedom of speech to voice their opinion. And if they didn't have an opinion on "persons of public interest" they wouldn't care at all. That's how stardom works.
As a 60 something Gran I hope all the young women listen to what I have to say. Take care of yourselves, let your inner beauty shine, & if anyone dares to mention that you don't look a certain way just smile & walk away. We all age differently & that's wonderful! We weren't born to be identical to everyone else. Be an individual & embrace your differences. True beauty comes from your heart & soul, how you treat others, & the respect & love you shower upon your fellow man. Beauty always fades, but a kind & generous heart will be remembered long after you've departed this world. Just don't let negative Nellie's get to you. Be secure in who you are & who you are becoming. Much love & respect to all of you younger women. You got this..... 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
I think in Bonnie's case especially, her aging is almost an afront to people who grew up watching her in movies; it's a reminder that we've all aged too. It's like my reaction to my niece having her 13th birthday. My immediate thoughts are "no you cannot be 13, I remember when you were born!" Meanwhile I'm over here still feeling like a kid myself in many ways! None of us like to be reminded that time keeps advancing on us. It's against our nature.
That I think is the root of my own takenabackness. I know it's not just because "woman look older" because I get the same feeling David Tennant or other male actors from TV shows I watched from the noughties and go "oh wait they're around their 50s now, wow". It's that reminder of that thing you love, that piece of media that's a snapshot in time, is getting older, just like yourself. It's the same feeling when people your own age get married and have kids while you're sitting here single going "wtf happened?!" It's when you're feeling stuck in a moment in time while the world moves on around you...
When it comes to Bonnie, her aging is a little intense and thats why people are, lets say...in judgemental awe. I am the same age she is (33) and I still look like 24 without any fancy treatments or whatever...so when I saw her on a picture a while ago, I totally admit that I also went like WTF, is she an alcoholic? I have a friend whos 48 and even she looks younger than Bonnie. We all age differently and sometimes its just...surprising.
Getting old is a privilege. I'm sure the poor girls who were married at 12 or 15 and all the poor men who died at 31 wouldve loved to get older. Because I'd rather look 30 at 20 than get treated like a 30 year old at 12
I think this is why 10,000 people sent Karolina photos of themselves. We knew this was the one 100% judgement-free space on the internet. Thank you for creating that. ❤❤❤
I think it's one thing to have an initial knee-jerk reaction to seeing something unexpected (which is generally normal and fine), but it's another thing to write negative comments and articles about it like it's something that needs to be dissected or discussed in depth. It also probably has something to do with people afraid of aging or feeling old themselves. "If the faces I've considered an integral part of my youth are so different now what does that say about me?"
I agree. In other words, not everything we think needs to be expressed. That's part of being polite - a value that has been neglected in recent years for the sake of "authenticity".
It's funny to me that most of the savage comments against women aging on tik tok are from young women. I think Genz, especially those that are late teens and early twenties have been exposed to filters, photoshop and celebs that get aggressive skin treatments or have had work done for so long that they don't know what the average 32 year old looks like. Developing eye lines and wrinkles is pretty normal in your thirties and not something to be ashamed of.
I’m Gen Z and 100% this is true. I catch myself at 23 sometimes thinking I’m old! It’s crazy! As I child I wanted to be the age I am now for as long as I can remember! It is sad how many people have started thinking like...pedophiles honestly. I was not happy with how I looked at 16 because I was so young looking and baby faced. I received SO much adult male attention then. Way more than I get now. It’s so gross. And lately I’ve been seeing some millenials saying how they’re aging better than Gen Z.... Adding to the problem! Also makes no sense. Everyone needs to realize aging is just a part of life. We need to stop photoshopping everything. It’s distorting brains👀
Could be too that a lot of Gen Z is still young enough that, since UA-cam and smartphone cameras happened in the mid 00s, they've been potential Content pretty much since birth. I've just always figured they've got a different perspective on all of it
Well women lift these young influencers up. Men don't care what or how women were they make up. They aren't tuning in to see how to shape their eyebrows and what plumper they use. Theres a reason cosmetics sponsor their content
I've been thinking about this for a while and I'm so glad you made a video on it. I saw someone comment (maybe on twitter?) about how Hilary Duff was still looking great at 35 - still??? She's in the literal prime of her life or is about to be, and it's so ridiculous! The most beautiful woman I've ever met was my school principal, who was in her fifties. Men in their fifties are often considered to be in the prime of their lives - think RDJ. These insane obsessions with, and standards for, youth are straight out of Twilight.
Honestly, I have been thinking about this and I think it is a skin type issue. People with very fair skin are just not intended to live in places with much sun and it is more damaging than I realized. I recognized this when I started looking at women with pale skin who lived in different places with more or less sun exposure or who were rabid about sunscreen. They literally do not look the same.
I'm 53. All my life, I never really had either the money or the patience for expensive treatments and maintenance, let alone Botox. I've inherited good genes from my mum, and I'm allergic to people commenting how I don't "look my age". I mean, what's that even supposed to mean? It's not an achievement to have fewer wrinkles! Some people have chronic pain or go through terrible life events. That kind of thing leaves traces. I always remind myself that people who say such things are trying to be nice and that their heart is in the right place, so I won't snap at them. But I really, really wish people would start focusing on other things. Ugh
I'll be 59 in February. I get compliments about my relative lack of wrinkles for my age and I don't understand it. It isn't an achievement. I simply drew the lucky lot in the DNA department as far as not having wrinkles. I have a lot of other health problems. I'd give away my smooth skin in a heartbeat not to have those.
I get this all the time and now I'm in my mid-thirties. People say I look like I'm in my mid-twenties, and they're all jealous that I'm thin like no, I'm starving all the time. Because my body just Burns through my food. I'm so sick of them being jealous of me. It's to the point I'm thinking, ma'am.. I'm just doing my job here I don't want your body dismorphia projected on me.
"Bonnie Wright is a 32 year old woman and has a face, therefore her face looks 32 years old." THANK YOU! That's what I've been saying (in my head because no one cares about my opinion). But it's so true. You are your age and therefore look your age. Everyone looks different and so everyone's 32 or 21 or 65 will look different as well.
The reason people talk about her is because she DOES NOT look 32 (33). She looks way older so its a little...lets say surprising. I am 33 too and I also had a little WTF-moment when I saw her. She looks like a woman who drank and smoked alot, not that she really did, but thats not "looking your age". People talk about things that are unusual but that doesnt mean she should be haunted by the media. I have an 48 year old friend and even she looks younger than her and we dont use any kind of fancy treatments. Saying that this is a normal look for a 33 year old woman, just cements the image in peoples heads that after 30, you age like a raisin...thats simply not true but some men will look at this and go "Oh this is what 30+ looks like?...Off the table for dating". She doesnt represent the average 33 year old imo. Also, the more we look around the world, we will see how it depends on race too. East asians look 25 until they hit 45 or something. Its positively crazy...even without all the treatments. Youth and beauty always had a certain value...and it will stay this way. We can complain about it, but thats what it is.
Bonnie Wright is absolutely gorgeous and I hope she doesn't take any of those disgusting comments about her appearance to heart. What, did they expect her to look the same as she did when she was twelve? Absolutely vile.
It's wierd how some people look at aging, especially when it's famous women, like it's some sort of crime or just bad and something you can control. Aging is just part of how humans work
Well you see, your appearance actually changes based on the Objective Morality of your thoughts. Haven't you seen those comparison pictures that say "this is how you age when you mind your business" "this is how you age when you are full of hate" etc? You can tell how Good or Bad someone is by looking at their face! This makes sense and is not just repackaged phrenology
Normal aging is in fact normal. I agree. But, there is a caveat. We do have some control over how we age because we usually have control of: sun exposure, fitness/weightlifting, body fat percentage [too low is bad], and all the faces you make [the expression you make is the wrinkle you get]. I have found photos of monks who are 90 years old and I will be blunt they age but it looks very different than how most do.
Here is one reason I did not hear mentioned as to why people have strong reactions to how a celebrity ages. When a celebrity we identify with ages well we feel hope that we will also age well. When a celebrity that we identify with ages badly we feel betrayed because of what that means for our mortality. When I read someone that is negative about aging I read that as someone that has trouble with their own aging process. Life is all about loss. We lose our childhood. We lose our fertility. We lose our parents. We lose friends. Eventually we all die. When we are young we see celebrities and as they age they remind us that our budding youth is withering too. We compare ourselves to celebrities. When a celebrity that is our age looks good we internalize that to ourselves. We shouldn't. But we do.
As a 51 year old woman, I noticed eye makeup does not look as attractive on my skin anymore (makes me look cheap) so a more natural look is actually a better choice. I feel makeup at this age can actually make me look older because it settles into my wrinkles.
I just had a similar conversation with my husband. I am 30. Most of my friends are 29-32. All of my friends have started to show signs of aging. Most of us have some fine lines or gray hairs. I think that consuming so much celebrity content makes us forget what women look like when they age naturally. I think social media is especially insidious. We expect people to look their best in films, on TV, and on billboards and glamour shots. However, many celebrities build an Instagram following based on relatability and accessibility. They occasionally juxtapose a close-up of a stretch mark, a patch of cellulite, or a messy countertop next to 20 different images of their filtered and edited face to imply that they’re just like us. Obviously, this is absurd. As a wife and mom of middle class means, I have nothing in common with Taylor swift except the close proximity of our ages. But celebrities can make a lot of money selling the idea that they share our insecurities and perceived shortcomings.
As a teenage girl, I say what's wrong with how Bonnie Wright looks? she's aged, yeah, but it's natural and she hasn't even aged all that much. I would say that her not trying to reverse her natural aging process makes her seem more mature and not desperate to hold onto something she knows she won't be able to keep forever (aka her youth). If we wanna talk about how she looks, I'd say she looks down to earth and like a genuinely happy person who got a shot at fame and used it to pursue other passions and goals of hers. I would say that Maegan seems like the opposite. Like she believes she has nothing without her youth (which may/may not be true). I think Bonnie gives of "I'd love to sit and chat and have coffee/tea" vibes where Meagan gives off "I'll take a photo with you and then leave my alone" vibes (maybe because I've never seen her smile) and I'd take friendly tea vibes over photo-and-leave vibes any day.
Just because someone doesn't smile, doesn't make them unfriendly. lol Also, resting bitch face is a thing and people who have that are told they are unapproachable, when in reality, they're super nice most of the time! Don't judge people based on how much they smile, it's no different to judging someone by their appearance. Your comment feels very judgemental.
personally, whenever I start to feel bad about how I look (whether it's aging or eurocentric beauty standards), I look at my aunties and other older people in my life who I admire and think are beautiful in their own right, but not only beautiful but caring, smart, talented, and everything else they are. not only does it make me feel better about myself, but it allows me to look at others in a similar way.
The “none of my business” mentality is something that I’ve been trying to internalize, especially when it comes to celebrities. People are going to age, people have things they don’t want to talk about. None of my business.
i'm 24 and my childhood best friend, who (like me) used to be heavily suicidal as a teenager, started getting grey hairs this year. every time i look at her i can only ever be so happy about it. we both lived to see her get grey hairs. i can't imagine seeing this as anything other than the immense victory and privilege it is. (and while it's not about aesthetics, she looks damn good too)
I actually think Bonnie is someone who's aging beautifully and I love how she doesn't hide her own features. But I think we need to stop judging women by their looks completely.
When I rediscovered her on Instagram a couple years ago I was legitimately surprised by how striking she is. I hadn’t seen a picture or appearance from her since we both had baby face lol and I was just like wow, she’s so beautiful. I totally agree with not judging people on how they age or what they do to their bodies but separate from her as a person, I was legitimately surprised to see people talking bad about Bonnie.
Society is so hypocritical. Woman gets botox: 'oh my god what has she done to her face, she should be natural' Woman doesn't have any cosmetic procedures: 'Ew not like that'. How do women in the media ever freaking win?
Smile and wave. Sometimes just being yourself and being seen is encouragement enough for others to feel free to do so too. I think of it as quiet influence. It's slower but also more deeply felt.
Aging is amazing. I'm thirty now and I finally don't have body dismorphia. I'm over weight now and my face is starting to drop, and yet for the first time I just don't care. I feel beautiful. As a younger 20 something I was always stressing about how ugly I felt (I was a cute girl but thought I was ugly for some reason) and how fat I was (I was well within my healthy weight range and I guess I felt like I was never skinny enough.) Now I'm thirty, a little over weight, and my face is starting to age a little and I just don't care anymore. I'm so happy just living life and just being me. It's the best feeling ever, and I would never go back to feeling like I was never hot enough. Aging is awesome. It really breaks down your pride and self obsession so you can just be happy with where you are at in the moment.
Hi Karolina - Thank you so much for addressing this. I really appreciate your perspectives always, and this is such an important topic. I saw that "aged" filter that was going around TikTok several weeks ago and tried it out. I actually loved the way I looked! I looked somewhat like my Nonna (grandmother), and I also looked like I had lived a full life with plenty of ups and downs. And it just made me think: "I should be so lucky!" (Particularly as someone who was severely depressed and passively suicidal for 6+ years during my late teenage years.)
When I was a teenager I always wanted to look older. And then after about age 25 I wanted to look younger. Now I've reached an age where if i go out in public without makeup, people will ask me if I'm not feeling well. No...that's just how my face looks. I like to think I look totally normal and fine for my age, but I don't look 25 anymore and apparently that's a real "fashion don't" for a woman.
Thank you for this video. I'm almost 56. You are 10000% right how people are sooo harsh on women no matter what they do. There's this weird dynamic of "how dare you get old" when people jump on aging celebrities as if people were entitled to see them as they first encountered them for the rest of their lives.
Both Megan and Bonnie face criticism and have her looks scrutinized for the exact same reason: mysoginy. Women aren't allowed to age no matter if they get work done or not. If they choose to age naturally they will get bashed for looking old and "letting themselves go". If they choose to get work done they will be criticized for looking overdone and ruining their looks. Women are allowed to choose what they do to their own bodies and people are not entitled to any explanations. And so sad to always see that women are primarily seen as purely their looks.
Omg I have a genetic condition that means I look really young on the outside. It also causes chronic pain and serious illness to my organs that'll probably end my life young. I would trade this looking young for having a healthier body in an instant. Looking young doesn't equate health, and doesn't equate beauty or wellbeing. this entire conversation drives me nuts, and I couldn't agree more - let people look how they look!!!
Social media is freaking brutal, man. Even just within our hobby circles with folks who have been around a while. HEAVEN FORBID people get older, gain weight, have kids, whatever. I’m glad you showed Bette Davis because she really embraced where she was at and continued to be a freaking amazing actress. That’s more admirable to me than having to be “forever young.”
Very timely. I remember when I was a teen back in the early 70s and hearing someone talk about how the actress Angie Dickenson had "let herself go" when she turned 40. I also remember someone saying "40 just kicked her in the face." I asked my mom about it and she said something about when a woman in Hollywood turned 40 their chances of getting good parts diminished. And now I see actresses in their 50s and 60s still getting good roles. I mean look at Jamie Lee Curtis and Michelle Yeoh getting Oscars at the last Academy Awards. Jamie just turned 65 and Michelle is in her 50s. So some things are changing, I've seen it in my lifetime, and I'm 69. I'll bet that most of the a$$h*les saying this crap are all Dude-Bros who are still living in their parents basement and couldn't get a woman to look at them.
I have been the same height and weight since 13ish, started graying at 20ish, still had acne at 25, slid down the Covid mental health chute through 27-28, wondered if I should get fillers because stress aged me to my actual age by 29, got breast cancer at 30, in remission from that and not giving a flying fuck about my wrinkles and grey hairs and asymmetrical nose at 31. I intend to be 40,50,60,70 and so wrinkly and ugly that I scare kids at Halloween because it’ll mean I’m still there and I’ve lived and learned.
The only reason I get, not upset, that's not the right word, rather shocked, is because when I see those types of people whom I "met" through XYZ movie/show/whatever media for the first time, I was also younger, and now seeing them grown up and older, it means time has passed for me as well, and that kind of depresses me. So, to me, it's not this ridiculous rage against aging, it's the inevitable truth that time passes by for all 😅
ohghh......my meds just kicked in and im getting so emotional about how beauty is this big evil machine that makes us feel bad about ourselves and we are all so beautiful and desireable and we keep being lied to by everyone
As a baby-faced 40YO who got her first grey hair last year I agree. I don't look that way because I'm doing something "better" than the others, I'm looking that way because of genetics. The same genetics that gave me PKOS, made me fat and will probably make me look instantly older as soon as I get menopaused.
I have PCOS too and a thyroid that killed itself when I hit my teens. Eating disorders and decades of weight cycling ensured I'd end up being heavy. Stupid doctors don't even look at my chart to see what health issues I have, they just start in on me about my size even though that isn't why I came to them. My son had an EMS instructor who said "Treat the patient, not the chart" and I wish doctors would do that! On the other hand, I get compliments for having nearly line-free skin at 58 years old, and I don't understand it. I didn't do anything to accomplish this except for hitting the DNA lottery in the smooth skin department. I'm not even particularly good at moisturizing. As Carrie Fisher said, youth and beauty aren't accomplishments. They are accidents of time and DNA.
@@DelightfulDissident that may be so, but does it mean we have less value? Wine is more valuable than milk. Wine tastes better as it ages. Maybe men age slower, but does that mean that when they do show the same signs of age as a woman, that their value is increased?
Aging as a woman. Otherwise known as slowly turning invisible to the outside world... typed as a 55 year old. That being said, aging is a privilege not to be taken for granted. Go out and thusly shake yon tail feathers... - Cathy (&, accidently, Steve), Ottawa/Bytown/Pimisi
It can be a mindfuck. It's not about cute crow's feet around the eyes. My neck and jaw have changed. I have much less hair. If I had as much as I had 15 years ago but it was gray.. I would have NO problem with it. Fat distribution has changed, and not in a good way, imo. (I'm not overweight) I want my hourglass/badass figure and big eyes back. Or maybe not. It looks as if women in their late 20's may be in for a rough ride, unless perhaps women our age (GenXers) are brave enough to break the cycle.
@@auntiegravity7713 What the 'kids' have to navigate now, between photo filters and fillers - it's beyond a mind bend. And, yeah, it looks like the world has finally cooked up a collective project for us Gen X Women to collaborate on. Aging with attitude. Figures. At least we still have the 80 & 90 yr old's to look to for advice and reassurance... Hug your stretch marks people - they are proof that you have been here. (and, as far as hair goes, I did not participate in Movember... you are welcome... le sigh... I can grow a goatee... absolutely ridiculous... humbug!)
LOL... probably. Sorry I missed seeing you. How did the garden grow for you this year? We got some nice tomatoes out of the balcony garden from your plants... thanks again.@@bunhelsingslegacy3549
I actually like the turning invisible part of aging. (I'll be 59 in February.) I wasn't at all sorry to say goodbye to gross creepers catcalling out of car windows. Sadly, it doesn't stop men old enough to be my father from hitting on me even though I dress like I just got out of bed after sleeping in my clothes. Men gonna men.
Honestly I when all this discussion about Bonnie came up I only looked up recent pictures of her and was blown away how pretty she is. She looks so confident and fresh, not like a child but like a woman. I love how she smiles and how much the soft little wrinkles give her character. Look at her eyes, it even looks like eyeliner wings, but she has it naturally!
I’m 26 and I got my first gray hair when I was 18. I’m honestly excited to be an old lady and it makes me sad that people get so worked up over age. I have a 33 year old coworker who is always bemoaning how OLD she is and it’s like… you’re still YOUNG! I’m still a child! Like, there’s so much more to worry about than the natural course our bodies take over time. I think it hurts me most when my mom gets really insecure about how “old” she’s looking, because she is honestly stunning. But she just can’t see it, even though I constantly try to remind her.
I've already decided to embrace aging as it naturally happens, but the pressure on women to look or not look all sorts of ways as they get older already feels overwhelming sometimes. I'm only 27, but I'm already noticing the beginning of wrinkles and started to get more frequent white hairs. And tbh I do feel very self conscious about it. But I want to be part of the movement that changes these pressures on women. So I personally don't plan to dye my hair when the whites and grays become more noticeable, and I already stopped wearing makeup regularly earlier this year. If people want to dye their hair or wear makeup, that's fine. The difference is feeling like you have to vs wanting to. The only anti-aging thing I'm committed to is a good skincare routine and daily SPF, haha.
*SPF fistbump* SPF, full body physiotherapy maintenance ,and flossing, those are my anti-aging commitments. Thank you for wanting to be part of the movement to change the pressures on us when according to "society" there's literally no way to do it right, you're either artificial or have let yourself go.
That sounds like a healthy mindset to get into, but more so for your mental health. Which in the long term is so much more valuable. I'm 30 now and also started questioning myself over how I want to age at 27. I gym pretty hard, but not because I want to be skinny I just want to appreciate my body while it's still working well. And also mental health haha. I feel any steps a person takes to question what is important to them and what is just influences from the outside world will always lead to being a more confident and comfortable person. Good luck with your journey x
I grew up hearing my mom joke she knew exactly how she was going to age because she looked just like her mom, my grandma, who also looked just like her mom, my great-grandma. As a result, I've never felt this intense need to stay youthful looking. I think that sort of view, that our features or how we age is part of our inheritance from the generations that came before just gets lost nowadays as we constantly compare ourselves to random strangers. I may never have met my great great great-grandmother, but I can look at the photos we have of her and see her descendants, including the way their features changed as the years went on.
I've never heard an explanation that fully accounts for the discomfort/anger that results when a woman dares to age. My best guess is it's multifactorial, but primarily comes down to two issues: fear of our own mortality, and misogyny. It's jarring when you realize a decade has passed since you last saw a celebrity, but it didn't feel like any time at all, so the fact that they look older reminds us we're aging too. For women, it reminds us that we've only got like a 10-year window in which we have influence and worth in society, because women are still primarily valued for how attractive they are to men - and men value youth above all else. For men, I think it reminds them of their own mortality, but they're also angry because on some level they feel that the woman aged ON PURPOSE, or else could have prevented it if she'd tried harder, and now she's broken the unspoken social contract that a woman who is not just out of childhood and super hot should quietly recede into obscurity. A lot of women comment on how they seemed to disappear when they hit their 40s; they became invisible to society. I think in the case of celebrities, like Karolina said, we're used to seeing them in a carefully curated, flattering wardrobe, hair and makeup professionally done at all times, lighting and photoshop and careful posing. This actress (Bonnie?) wears casual stuff and seems to have minimal makeup most of the time. I guarantee with professional lighting, wardrobe, hair, makeup, posing, and everything most celebs use, the comments would have been way different. Part of the problem is people don't realize what women look like without makeup and an army of aestheticians.
I'm 40 and I'm still getting spots. I have sympathy for women in the public eye who have to deal with this. And it's frustrating that there is a double standard and men are not subjected to the same. However, I do get a bit annoyed when they have financial interests in some sort of anti-aging product - either an actual product, or a general 'wellness' thing - and then don't tell the truth about the procedures they have. Or when they pretend not to photoshop their images. That is very dishonest in my opinion and does a lot of harm. They are presenting results that you literally can't achieve.
I work in a funeral home and it’s given me so much more perspective on aging. When we get cases who have passed in their 30s 40s and even 50s they’re all considered young. There is so much life to live beyond your 20s
I’ve had gray hairs since I was in the 6th grade. I’ve maintained a skincare routine since I was 17, which is why a lot of people think I’m younger, because I’ve managed to slow aging from wearing sunscreen regularly. But if you look at my hair it’s basically 50% gray and I’m not considering dying it because it does remind me I’m getting older. Gray hair is not a problem, it’s actually because of genetics that hair grays differently for everyone.
The differences between when people go gray is crazy. My younger sister got grays at 25. I’m 30 without a gray in sight. It is one of the easier physical attributes to fix if you want to. (No need for plastic surgery or weight loss. Just a dye job.) But I imagine that might also be a pain if you’re not into dying your hair for fun. ❤
Oh yeah, greying sure is genetic. My paternal grandmother was completely white at 30. I'm not quite 50 but have more white hair than my dad did at 52 when he died but my dad's brother was completely white by 50. My mom's cousin visted recently and he's in his 70s and I've got significantly more grey hair than he does. I had more white hair than the mother of one of my boyfriends when I was in university, though his dad was completely white and he and I had similar greying even though he was two years younger than me. I do dye my hair, but because I like how I look with blue and purple streaks, not cause I'm trying to cover the grey. In fact I leave the whitest parts (behnd my ears) completely au naturel for fun colour differentiation! I was visiting with friends this weekend and we're all within two years of each other, and two of us are more than 50% grey, the other two are still the same hair colour they had in high school, no dye. I've been going grey since 18, but my husband who's only a month and a half younger than me has only just this year started to get a few white hairs at his temples, though his beard's been showing white streaks for the last decade or so. Same with most of our male friends, just the faintest scattering of silver for most of them, though to be fair a few of them go cueball now so I can't say for certain that I'm the greyest in my group of friends, just that I'm the greyest of those who have hair...
That sounds like a pretty cool combo, I hope I'm heading in a similar direction, I'm 30 and I still occasionally get ID'd for energy drinks. Lately even though my skin is mostly fine(if you ignore the stupid dermatitis) I've been trying out anti-ageing stuff since it seems like most men just don't and I find it interesting. I don't actually care how people view me but I wanna see how long I can get ID'd for!
People have never been able to guess my age. They get it wrong in both directions, starting as a teen. This made me realize that in general society is very stupid and wants to do things it is not capable of, and not mind its own business. 😂
What’s wild is that when I was a preteen adults thought I was old enough to drive but now that I’m 21 and finally got my breast reduction people are surprised when I say I can drink. I’ve learned that no one knows what a face looks like. Especially a woman’s face.
Society is indeed full of idiots. I get mistaken for a kid due to my smaller height, small hands and young face, when I'm infact 29 years old. It's only when I put on makeup do people see that I'm an adult; Of course, I wear makeup purely because I want to and because it's fun, not to impress others, but still, it's annoying that people are so stupid and biased. Why are people like that? Ugh.
Nah, being mortal is not the problem...losing beauty is. I dont wanna be immortal and I am not scared of death (not the end anyway), but if I could freeze my look right now I would. Not even for someone else. I just like what I see in the mirror, I am grateful for it and appreaciate it every day for the creation it is...I see it as a blessing. Its just natural that we love aesthetic things and wanna keep them.
I am also 32. I got married and had kids young, and until literally this year, I kept getting people assuming I was the nanny when I went to school pickup. It's really nice to finally be treated like a grown-up. But I do have a baby face, and I come from a family of baby-faces. My parents are in their late sixties and look a decade younger. My siblings each have stories about having to pursade people that they were actually adults, like when my brother got pulled over at 26 after coming out of a liquor store by a cop who assumed he was underage. Meanwhile, my husband frequently doesn't get carded at restaurants, and that's been the case since he turned 21. His two brothers were completely bald on top before they turned 30. He still has hair, but it's thin and we know the years are numbered. Genes are weird. Faces are weird. And that's wonderful.
Sweet. Baby. Jesus. Both of these women still look SO. YOUNG. What do people think they want!?!? I am 44, almost 45. My hair is completely grey. My body has been through childbirth and almost twenty years of marriage. If I looked a fraction of how lovely either of these individuals look, I would feel like Aphrodite. The internet needs to get its shit together.
When I saw this video pop up, I knew exactly what it was going to be about, because I saw the same thing and I was disgusted. I called multiple people out for it and was just met with a complete lack of empathy, and told that it was basically fair game to hassle a woman for aging naturally. In a world so obsessed with aging and horrified at the thought of a wrinkle (we have young women using Botox, fillers with anti aging skincare routines), I do despair sometimes. I'm 38 now and the struggle to block out all that noise is REAL.
The fact that the media has been feeding us pictures of celebrities photoshopped to perfection for our whole lives also plays a big role in this. We want to think that oh, it's 2023 and things are different now because more and more people show their faces online without filters etc. but reactions like those you mentioned show that changing people's mentality will always be the longest battle
I almost checked out permanently at age 20, so every time I have a birthday now I'm like wow, I'm really still here, that's awesome. I'm 35 now and I have a good bit of gray hair. I actually love it! It sparkles in the sun like tinsel. I wish it would all go so I could dye it crazy colors without having to bleach first! My mom is one of those women who won't speak of her age and gets mad when I celebrate her birthday and that makes me so sad. I wish women weren't made to feel bad just for getting older.
I know this wasn’t exactly the point of your comment but thanks for the little reminder that someday I’ll be so grateful I didn’t check out permanently now. Your comment is worded beautifully.
It's a mental hurdle for sure. Nasty people with awful opinions and inconsiderately commending on your life does not help. I remember throughout my teen years to 24-25. I always felt insecure or self conscious... I slapped on make-up, curled/ styled my hair everyday, made sure I had my hair done pretty, painted my nails, always wore new-ish "trendy" clothes, was overly obsessed with my figure and face (thought of this way too often throughout the day), was unkind to myself and had eating disorders. I took pictures and pretended (masked) that I was happy and content. From 25 to now 31 my daily efforts are self care, my health, wellbeing, mindfullness, self kindness, and my abilities. Being more myself, more self aware and truly happy with who I am. I remind myself daily of how far I've come. I dislike wearing makeup because of the feeling on my skin. Have my hair as I want it and barely ever heat it or style it, I wear clothes for comfort over everything else, and I don't care for trends (because they are wasteful, they alter, and pass). I look forward to changing, developing and aging from a healthy perspective, no longer dreading change in any way because of unattainable beauty standards. "The Media" brain washes society to believing beauty is more important than anything, to control people (especially Women). It is entirely wrong, living a fufilled life as you desire is the top priority. Anyone who judges your life and how you live it can honestly f*** off and go judge their own life. Do some much needed self reflection. 😂
I didn’t follow „Ginny’s” career , but it’s heartwarming to hear that actress from my childhood seems to have grown into happy and accomplished person - that’s the only thing that matters to me. Also, I’m 21 years old and based on my present looks, I’m guessing that I may start aging a bit quicker than my peers in incoming years. Thank you for this reasonable video (and similar comment section) - I’m not particularly insecure about my looks anymore, but it was still nice to hear.
I work in assisted living and get to see all the good and bad that comes with aging, and there definitely *is* a lot of good with the bad! I also lost my husband a few years ago just shy of his 40th birthday and I would give just about anything to be able to experience growing older with him. Like others have said here, we really need to remember that aging is a privilege!
Finally someone speaks out. Some people are so rude to Bonnie Wright. She looks her age. People need to be a bit more realistic. I bet most mean commenters also look their age instead of looking like a photoshopped instagram model
We are so afraid of aging and death, we put so many resources in prolonging life far beyond what our bodies are programmed for instead of resources for dignified aging, dying and support with coming to terms with aging and death, and making sure people in their old age aren’t getting lonely and depressed.
There's also another thing where *some individuals (apparently) age early, and then immediately stop looking older:* so basically *those who just look 50 forever!*
I got my first gray hair when I was 12…but at 42 I still occasionally get carded. So even within a person aging isn’t always on the same track. I try never to judge age by looks and go with behavior if I can
As someone who is around Bonnies age and always thought my lines on my forhead are not normal for someone my age she makes me feel a lot better. She is so beautiful, the lines dont matter. My skin is also very fair
I think it truly shows how obsessed we are with looking good and also shows where our value lies. There’s no more beauty inwardly. Our young girls are looking at tik tok people and aren’t being reminded of where beauty comes from
Great video! I think it’s also an issue with some celebrities of them just looking “different” than what we remember. If you’ve just watched Harry Potter for the 100th time and see a picture of any of the cast now, you’re going to be like “hey, they don’t look like they did 5 minutes ago! How did that happen?” Our society moves so fast that we forget the age of some of the media we consume - and it unfortunately immortalizes the people who starred in them, instead of allowing them to grow and change. ❤
That's true. Our brains (at least the subconscious parts) have trouble distinguishing between a real memory and something seen on screen. Especially now that so much of our time is spent on screens, it's no wonder we're losing our grip on reality.
It's really upsetting how we are treated as we age 😢 women seem to never be enough. I'm so fed up with it. I'm 45 and I literally became invisible 10 years ago. Then trying to keep my "beauty/young appearance" has become exhausting and a losed battle to be honest. I just don't care anymore. It feels much better. Love yourself as you are. Embrace aging and be grateful you get to have a long life ❤
My mom (who’s 43, not old per se but she does have a fair amount of wrinkles) always thinks it’s silly when people around her are terrified to age or tell people how old they really are. She says she knows much more and she’s happier than she was in her 20s. She’s proud of her age and I’m happy to have a role model like her :)
Aging is sooo different for everyone and we should celebrate it. I had my first grey hairs when I was so young - 21 years old and I was sooo scared because of that, I thought that maybe I will get menopause soonxD. Ten years later I have like 1/4 of my hair grey but besides of that I look very youthful, people still think that I'm a student. After all I am glad of having my grey hairs that fast - after first shock and terror - concept of aging stopped being scary for me - that is a long, long process that is making me being me.
I could not love this video enough. About 10 minutes ago I essentially wrote a comment addressing this exact issue, on a video about Jennifer Lawrence's plastic surgery. I'm 51, and aging is difficult for me. This was freeing to watch. Thank you!
![Why Are Body Parts Fashion? [RANT]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/cpdxKp8nDfc/mqdefault.jpg)
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"How People Are Aging Is None of Our Business" Says the _gorgeous_ creator, that doesn't seem to ever age. 😂😂 Sorry, I just _had_ to poke fun. XO
Lighting is GOD, to anyone in front of a camera in 2023! If you don't have perfect light & know your angles you can age yourself 10 yrs. THAT'S okay though!
An intelligent analysis as always Karolina. All true!
So my browser doesn't allow me to access nordvpns website. Supposedly is blocked by the net provider. UK, virgin media. Anyone else?
@KarolinaZebrowskax , you are 100% correct on this.
I find it so disgusting when there are these people in their ages of 40s, 50s, 60s, and 70s still acting like they are cliquish snob 10-year-old brats by judging people's appearance. And these people don't even realize how disgusting they are.
@@kimberlycooper4170 Who's doing that?
People: "I don't understand why so many people in Hollywood get plastic surgery and Botox."
Also people: *Sees one wrinkle. "Oh wow, they let themselves go! She's so old now."
Jamie Lee Curtis did a photo spread making a joke of how she'd got out of shape! And yet most women her age would be happy to look like her...
I grew up just a little bit away from Hollywood and some of the local news stations would report on female actresses getting 'work' done. To the point of having photographers hiding is bushes and such to get a picture. And god help them if the didn't have work done. And if any actor committed the cardinal sin of getting older and looking it...they were fodder for running mouths.
As much as I want to judge the beauty standards that society puts onto us, I never, ever, ever want to judge any individual for wanting to get plastic surgery. It’s not an easy thing to live in this world of Instagram and zoom meeting image distortion. ❤❤
Exactly, but that's why you need to ignore that stuff.
Those are very different group of people, obviously
Growing old is honestly a privilege and society/online audiences need to remember that before they start to get offended by a celebrity getting older.
Im 53, Ive nearly died so many times, I was once pronounced dead at the scene and put in a body bag...!!! I love getting old - it beats being dead cos being dead is astonishingly boring...
@@piccalillipit9211 ah.. I love that comment. Would like to be like that in attitude in 23 years. Thanks for inspiration:)
@@kuroinokitsune Yeah nearly dying is miserable at the time - but great for a sense of perspective 😀
Totally. ESPECIALLY in the US where not everyone gets easy access to basic preventative medical care. 😭
I’m grateful to be alive and 43 ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
The Pamela Anderson thing is especially illustrative because she has said that after her beloved long-time make up artist died of breast cancer recently, she decided she just wouldn't wear make up anymore because there's no point now. The fact that the media made a whole story out of it and kind of pushed her to disclose something so personal and potentially painful - something that is NONE OF ANYBODY'S BUSINESS - really shows how bizarre it is that we scrutinize people's looks and personal choices so much and so publicly.
Yep and you know an old man would never get this kind of attention if he isn't doing skincare and what not.
For anyone growing up with Bay Watch, who would have thought Pamela Anderson would have both a fair measure of intelligence and decency? My hat off to her for standing up for her friends memory.
@@p.bckman2997 I grew up on Baywatch too and I don't understand why it's such a shock to you? Were you expecting her to be stupid and indecent or something lol?
honestly the fact that she doesnt wear makeup anymore is probably great for her skin as she gets older, might actually help her keep it healthy for longer.
@@sabrinagranger5468, I guess you're right. She played the dumb bimbo really well. I've seen a few statements from her these later years, and she seems like a genuinely decent and sensible person, unlike many celebrities.
I think part of the negative response is people trying to "other" aging in order to deal with their own fears of aging. By treating aging as something you can do wrong you can convince yourself that you will do it right, that you don't have to worry about society treating you like it treats everyone else when you get old. It's kinda like how people will victim blame to convince themselves that bad things only happen to you if you let them.
oh dang, yeah
This is it. ❤
Nailed it.
That’s so perceptive xx
True words
Women literally can't win. "She should just age gracefully!" vs. "Why did she let herself go?" An interesting consequence of this is some movie directors say they struggle to find people for historical movies, because everyone has had work done that wouldn't look right in the historical setting. Which breaks my heart cause I love period pieces, but how do you do them if everyone has "21st century face"?
But also is interesting how Hollywood itself is contributing so much to this problem. The way that main female roles only center young women or women that look very young despite the actual character's age, not only leaving more mature looking actress with much less opportunities but also creating more pressure on young actresses to do something to maintain their youthful appearance in order to preserve their careers. On the other hand, older actors are frequently casted for characters that are main to be way younger than their real age. See recent Napoleon's cast: he's able to play the character at the beginning when he's supposed to be a young man while being in I don't know, his fifties? an zero characterization or special effects, while the actress for Josephine is way younger and they "age" her with makeup at the end of the movie.
Makes me think of that recent persuasion adaptation where the Anne actress had a face that just knows what emailing is.
What they're actually having a hard time finding is people who are old, but still youthful in appearance. Not wrinkly, but not with plastic surgery or botox. They want people who simply don't exist. I would say there are some people that match that description out there, but not a lot. It's unattainable for most of us.
@@dannahbanana11235yeah, finding a person who is aging beautifully AND is an actor AND is interested in playing the role X when the Holywood is that kind of place with that stressful lifestyle that tends to burn and thus age people faster on average must be real hard. Geee, i wonder why
I just watched Gilded Age and the difference between older women in this TV show comparing to Downton Abbey is astonishing! In Downton Abbey there are very good looking older women with wrinkles vs. Gilded Age - there in none single wrinkle in the whole saga! Only the neck of older characters can make you guess the actual age of the characters/actors. Lots of botox and facelifting on every women there and it is supposed to be the end of the 19th century. It is really sad where the standards in Holywood had shifted.
The “men are maturing vs. women are getting old”- that is absolutely the (messed up) perception being perpetuated!! You nailed it. It’s such a brutal double standard.
Thank you for this video. ♡
There's a quote from a Czech director (female). Who said (and I'm paraphrasing): "Men are made prettier by their grey hair, they mature with age and one day, they suddenly...perish"
no the men look terrible too, I see the conversations. If anything the men look worse.
Not a double standard,men just age better,deal with it.
I have a different experience. My male friends who are about 20 years old say that women are like wine and they are scered of being older as a man.
We dont value male youths but value youth in women.
Most men have no value until they turn 35.
In regards to aging and weight gain: I’m 32 and I’ve always been overweight. Sure I’ve gained 30lbs since high school but since I’ve always been “the fat one” everyone tells me “Omg you haven’t changed a bit!”. Meanwhile, my poor sister went from skinny to my size and well…people are much less kind about it. We are literally the same size, but since I match people’s memory of me, I’m praised while she’s judged for daring to look different.
I feel you so much girl. I’m 30 and recently lost 100 pounds. My sister (2 years younger) used to look like my clone until I gained weight and then we no longer looked alike. But then she gained a bit of weight and I lost and suddenly we look like twins again. It’s very awkward. And it’s like, at any size, we’re just people. ❤❤
People literally aren't supposed to be the size they were in highschool before they had grown adult bodies! I have to remind people of that sometimes.
@@I_am_Lauren And I still have to remind myself of that every time I look in the mirror.
I feel so bad for your sister fat people are so ugly aren’t they? 😢
The opposite is true as well, I used to be very obese as a teenager and I lost 70 lbs and even tho I'm nowhere near thin (I'm actually still overweight bmi wise) many people call me thin or have even expressed concern that I am too thin.
I always found it odd until I realized that they remember me much bigger and so the difference is shocking to them because they don't see me everyday like I see myself everyday.
I’ve had friends younger than me pass away. I understand aging is a privilege and not something to hide or be ashamed of.
I’m sorry for your loss.
Poorly aged white ♀️ take
It isn't, but not everybody likes the visual changes that come with it and it's okay to do something about it if you don't agree with nature
How Rude.......@@vklnew9824
@@MrVinceMunro True. As much as I agree with the original poster, I dread the day I start aging. I'm only 29 now, but the dread is ingrained into me. More so because when you get older, there's the whole thing about dealing with health problems, ect.
This reminds me of a story about a woman running a cooking channel on facebook. She was 31 years old and had a decent amount of grey hair. She kept getting hate comments about looking ''like an old hag'' and how she should dye her hair. Turns out she was terminally ill and she knew she would likely not live to 70 years old. Grey hair reminded her she was still alive and her husband wanted her to keep the grey hair so they could grow old together. A male host would not get such comments, and she had to come out with her personall stuff to explain her grey hair. It's like we can only accept signs of aging if we have a proper excuse for it. You can't just AGE because it's a human thing we all go through. You have to have a proper excuse for looking old, but even then it can be not enough because ''well, you're rich, do somthing about it''.
There seems to be a lot of hatred to grey hair. After I got sick, I decided I would not dye my hair anymore.
It’s like a female tax of sorts. A lot of women spend about 100-200 dollars per month to get their roots dyed after their hair is dyed.
They also paint their fingernails and toenails. God help them if they don’t “keep themselves”.
Yet men are allowed to go grey naturally, and they don’t have to do the makeup/hair and nails routine
It’s just that people have a strange ask of women - stay young.
That’s awful that she had to deal with those sorts of comments, as if she didn’t have enough going on. ☹️ It’s totally normal to start getting some gray hair in your 30s (probably not a lot, but some). Heck, I knew a healthy guy who started going bald in his early 20s-he just had a genetic predisposition to going bald young.
I've had some grey hair since 15 and literally nobody has ever cared. Not a single soul alive ever cared. This must be an American story. Europe is chill.
that's American and informed by pr0n. @@BlackSeranna
@@BlackSeranna yeap I agree.
Yet some people bleach their hair... then tone it grey, and get praise and compliments for how amazing their hair looks. When it is artificial!
Yet naturally "greying" is shamed. Ahhhgrrrrr 🤦♀️
Humans have the most frustrating illogical thoughts and behaviours, love to contradict themselves. It's infuriating and saddening. 😭
Honestly, Bonnie looks refreshing in the sea of all the celebrities getting the same cosmetic procedures and becoming straight up copies of each other. Have you noticed that celebrities' faces get more and more similar these days? It's so nice to see a regular woman in her thirties, who is still goddamn beautiful, and simply looks her age. It helps me to set expectations for myself in the future instead of comparing myself to multiple walking advertisements of plastic surgeries
could not agree more!
You don’t have to take a swipe at women that do get work done and say they all look the same to make your point. Not shitting on women for getting work is also part of accepting women looking how ever they look. Don’t shit on ladies with surgery because it’s just as shitty as crapping on women who don’t. Misogyny is a double edged sword of damned if you do damned if you don’t.. so don’t be the ass on the other side of the equation.
But they DO look f*ing awful. That trend needs to stop. I think it is ok to point it out since it seems to be the only thing you see with stars these days.
@@bitchywomanIt's not misogyny to note that the trends in plastic surgery do make many women look similar; the plastic surgery culture and pressure to have our faces and bodies conform to trends is what is in fact misogyny in action. It's possible to regret this evolution and to see it becoming sadly more and more prevalent without judging the individual women who have had work done. If we can't comment on anything in our culture that pressures women to literally hurt themselves to conform to completely unattainable beauty standards because it's supposedly misogynistic to talk about any choices women have made in a negative way, then we literally can't criticise anything in our culture. It's not a good thing that people feel so much pressure to look young or different that they willingly have knives put to their face and it's not misogyny to point out that this culture reduces all, but most often women's bodies and faces to objects that should conform to what's fashionable at that moment.
hard disagree, she is too lazy to wear SPF and looks haggard
I'm slightly older than her and everyone I know looks younger than her. Even the smokers. She has the budget, she can afford SPF50.
I used to be a very heavy drug user all throughout my 20s. I turn 36 in 4 days, and the fact that I am even alive to say this is a blessing. So I wear my wrinkles and aging face as a badge of honor, cuz it is truly a miracle I am even here to get them.
I hope you will have a wonderful birthday 🎉🎉🎉
I’m 36 too and was also at a point in my 20s where I didn’t think I’d make it. So here’s to each and every year we age and the signs of it that follow 🎉🎉🎉
I almost lost my life to suicide -compounded by "self soothing" with drugs. I've decided to, after getting PhD, to become a doctor and thus study with people 15 years junior, from different backgrounds and much wealthier families to boot. It's difficult, with how much people are obsessed with appearance, with how important it seems but I hope to be able to have a little bit of positive influence on my surroundings. I hope that if we all teach the people around us to be kinder to eachother,the media - run by those same people,yes, but with financial incentives to push products and procedures - will at least somewhat follow.
🥲🥹🌈 this brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing ❤
Hey Sag, hey! Happy belated and blessed birthday!🎉 Each day is a new day for new chances.
Years ago, I initiated this rule for myself when commenting, posting, whatever. Never talk about someone’s looks unless asked for. Frankly even if it’s a compliment, no. My opinion on how someone looks is completely irrelevant and I have NO idea what might be triggering to someone else. Talk about people’s work or their words. Not their looks.
My rule for commenting on appearances is - compliment something they have control over. "I love your nail color!" is much more polite than "you have beautiful eyes." Also, only mention something "wrong" if they can fix it easily. "Oh, your tag is sticking out" is fine, but "there's a stain on the back of your shirt" is rude.
Simply holding your tongue and minding your business is a perfectly good strategy too lol
@@tensegemstone1394
Both of these comments are great advice and should be standard procedure.
@@tensegemstone1394 love it haha
it depends though, if your hanging at a friends house
and notice there is a stain on his shirt, might be wise to mention it so he could change
Or offer to lend him a jacket@@tensegemstone1394
LOVE that. And I am fine giving my honest opinion on a politically conservative blogger or something like that. But it helps to focus on actions or content. ❤❤
The timing of this video is so spot on, because just 30 minutes ago I was watching a youtube reel with Emilia Clarke and thinking about this exact issue. Every time I watch a video with her there's so many people leaving absolutely nasty comments about how old she looks and it just infuriates me. She was 25 when GOT premiered and now she's nearing 40, of course she's going to look different. She's aging just like any other person and it really bothers me that people won't leave her be and keep those terrible comments to themselves.
not to mention that Emilia nearly died of a stroke! medical trauma is not easy on the body.
Also Emilia Clarke still looks absolutely stunning, like what is wrong with some people honestly💀
But does she even look old? I saw her on stage in chekhov last year and i had no idea of her age, id have guessed around 30.
While that is valid I had no idea GOT came out that long ago because I have no sense of time passing 😂😀 so I might have been surprised to see her change, just because I wouldn't have realized that time has passed ..
Some people are just so hateful and miserable.
Emilia Clarke is absolutely stunning no matter how old she is. I love how she embraces being her natural self, she's genuine and seems like a lovely person. 🥲
In a world completely overrun by adults who are basically grown up children, witnessing aging is probably pretty horrifying for them.
It's the last acceptable "ism."
See that's the thing, it's their fear yet they feel the need to dump that on others who couldn't care less if they age.
@@BsTheLadynred exactly how a child would
Makes me think of Logan's Run.
Aging also means accountability. I think so many people have observed the trend of some influencer being forgiven their mistakes/misdeeds because 'they're young, they don't know any better' and once you're in your thirties, that grace period is over, people expect you to know what you're doing.
The idea that people all age at different rates is so important. My partner has had grey streaks in her hair since her early 20s. She's had the beginnings of laugh lines and wrinkles around her eyes since her mid 20s. She's generally not felt self conscious about it thankfully because this is the norm in her family. I'm still getting acne and given my family history I likely won't see a ton of signs of aging for a while - but I know it's coming. Seeing my partner embrace her aging has definitely reaffirmed in me my desire to buck my family's trend of bemoaning their signs of aging.
There's also this idea that the reason we clamor for aging men and discard aging women is because with age often comes increased access, wisdom, and power. A women getting more of those is threatening to people rather than sexy because societally we sexualize female vulnerability and availability. It's funny though because those same women who get discarded by mainstream outlets become icons in queer communities precisely because of those reasons.
The gays and the girlies love a strong, middle aged mama
@@alexterieur8813 Queen Latifah!! That's the first thing that popped into my head ~"When you're good to mama, mama's good to youuuuuu"~ XD
@K.C-2049 Same here. As a fellow straight white girl, she's possibly the only woman I've ever looked at and genuinely thought, "she's sexy", but in a nice way, you know? Specifically her 'When You're Good to Mama' number in the Chicago movie musical
Your last point is excellent. Tanks for uplifting comment. Sending you and your beautiful partner love
nobody craves old men, hollywood lies because they're signing the checks
Every time i get anxious about aging, i remember that I'm almost the same age my dad was when he died. I've had friends and family that died when they were younger than me. Getting old is a privilege.
I feel the same way. My older brother died at the age of 22. He would be 30 this year. It is jolting to think that I outlived him by over 1/3 of the time he was alive. I would love to see him with greying hair, a receding hairline, and all the hallmarks of getting old. It is indeed a privilege to age and not be a young memory in a photograph
Exactly! I'm 42 now and some of the people I went to uni with have already died. I love my life as it is right now. Getting old is an absolute privilege. And as an added bonus, I've found that the older I get, the less I care about other people's opinions about the way I look, how I choose to spend my money, what I wear or what kind of music I like. It takes away soo much pressure!
As someone that never expected to live to 18 but is now 32 I gotta say I take ageing as a beautiful journey. I'm excited to be in my 30s. I can't wait to be in my 40s and so on. Every birthday is something to be thrilled over. I also weigh more now than I ever have and it's not the end of the world. I do still have a youthful face, but honestly I always hated that because people would treat me like a child (some still do). Wrinkles, weight, grey hair, scars, stretch marks...it's all just part of the story.
I need to work on seeing things this way
I think exactly like you. I get excited when I see signs of ageing in myself, I love to see how I changed. I despised being a kid and a teen, so to me looking older is looking happier
@@alexterieur8813 It's not a huge one moment change but a series of smaller changes over time that really help with gaining security in self. Try starting with body neutrality (I am content with my body instead of forcing I love my body)
😢😢😢😢 thanks for sharing thids
Carrie Fisher once said “men are *allowed* to age.” Remember how often many men are still praised as attractive even when they’re old compared to what we've all heard about old women.
Carrie was a raging gynocentrist and you seem to be too. What's new?
Carrie also went after the female beauty influencers who commented about her aging.
@@somethingclever8916 Patriarchy ingrains hatred of women, and pick me girls are often some of the worst of misogynists.
Women only find about 20% of men to be physically attractive. Those same men tend to remain attractive as they age. Unattractive men remain unattractive as they age. This is how women see it. Thankfully most women find men attractive in other ways than simply the physical.
Otoh, men see about 80% of young women as attractive. As women age, they become less physically attractive to men.
These are both biological realities that neither men nor women truly choose, and this is probably based on mating potential. Women tend to be most able to have children when they are younger whereas a man can become a father at a much higher age.
This set up is unfair to both men and women in certain ways, but it is based on biological urges and instinct. Picking on women because they look older is shallow and I would never do that. At the same time, the feeling that a woman is or is not attractive is depressingly tied to how old she looks. I don't like this reality but it is a reality.
@@therealuncleowen2588 A man's personality, personal hygiene, general habits, and his value system are 90-99.9% of what determines a man's overall attractiveness. His outer appearance may catch the eye, but everything else about him is usually what eliminates him from someone else's consideration. As for biology, if that were the only real motivation, pregnancy, birth, and 20+ years of childrearing are far too costly and high risk to spend and waste all those resources on just anyone. That's just reality.
I think there could also be an element here of people hating to see their own aging reflected back at them. They remember these people being young when they were young and, when they see these actresses aged, they are forced to confront (deep down) the fact that they have also aged. That makes them feel dysphoric and they project it outwardly.
Also, while women certainly receive the brunt of this, I disagree that it doesn't impact men as well. Other child actors, like Macaulay Culkin, have also struggled with judgment and scrutiny as they exist in the public eye as adults.
As a society, we've learned to express our own dissatisfaction with ourselves through these celebrity "proxies" and it's become a way for us to avoid processing these emotions. If we can develop true empathy for ourselves, then we can also better accept the others around us.
VERY well said! I've been trying to put my finger on this.
It does impact men too, but on a MUCH lesser scale than women. Famous men get the odd derisive tabloid article, women literally get sh*t on on the regular, any kind of woman, famous or not.
This ++
One actor quit being James bond because he thought it was disgusting to have to make out with women the age of his granddaughter. Because old men with power and money are not "old" in societies eyes.
Preach
Im 34 and wish I had aged as beautifully as Bonnie Wright. But also I'm not torn up about it lmao. I always felt so bad for her in the HP days because she was always compared with Emma Watson and Harry/Hermione shippers would come for her. Give this woman a break.
whatever you look like, you are aging as beautifully as bonnie Wright, I promise. ❤️
Without knowing much about you, it's possible that your 57 year old self would regret you not documenting yourself as you are right now. I think you look great... but who cares what I think. I look back at photos of myself in my 30's and wish I had more. For what it's worth, I think you look great right now. Edit: I look ok right now. Nothing scary happened.. :) But my 34 year old self.. sigh..
Yah already establishing that hierarchy with choosing to call it well aged ...
Shipping stans are so delusional... This is why I cannot be in fandoms.
I'm also 34 and I don't get people's sh*talking Bonnie... And also Pamela looks amazing. It's insane to me how people feel invested in women's aging process :/
really don't understand why people take so personally what a woman does or does not do with her face. minding your own business is actually a delight
They don't take it personal. They just use their freedom of speech to voice their opinion. And if they didn't have an opinion on "persons of public interest" they wouldn't care at all. That's how stardom works.
If they've never tried it, how would they know? 😂
@saymyname2417If you were the target of such "freedom" you wouldnt be as soft with them.
As a 60 something Gran I hope all the young women listen to what I have to say. Take care of yourselves, let your inner beauty shine, & if anyone dares to mention that you don't look a certain way just smile & walk away. We all age differently & that's wonderful! We weren't born to be identical to everyone else. Be an individual & embrace your differences. True beauty comes from your heart & soul, how you treat others, & the respect & love you shower upon your fellow man. Beauty always fades, but a kind & generous heart will be remembered long after you've departed this world. Just don't let negative Nellie's get to you. Be secure in who you are & who you are becoming. Much love & respect to all of you younger women. You got this..... 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
This.....👆👆👆👆👆. Thank you for sharing your wisdom here🙂.
💓💓💓💓💓
Thank you so much 💖🥰 I'm a 18 year old and your comment made my day! ❤
@@mrsfruity76 💖💖💖
@@uschilou 💖💖💖
I think in Bonnie's case especially, her aging is almost an afront to people who grew up watching her in movies; it's a reminder that we've all aged too. It's like my reaction to my niece having her 13th birthday. My immediate thoughts are "no you cannot be 13, I remember when you were born!" Meanwhile I'm over here still feeling like a kid myself in many ways!
None of us like to be reminded that time keeps advancing on us. It's against our nature.
I totally agree, it’s always so disturbing to see how much time has passed
I agree. I think of how everyone responds to Judy Garland when she wasnt playing Dorothy in the wizard of oz
That I think is the root of my own takenabackness. I know it's not just because "woman look older" because I get the same feeling David Tennant or other male actors from TV shows I watched from the noughties and go "oh wait they're around their 50s now, wow". It's that reminder of that thing you love, that piece of media that's a snapshot in time, is getting older, just like yourself. It's the same feeling when people your own age get married and have kids while you're sitting here single going "wtf happened?!" It's when you're feeling stuck in a moment in time while the world moves on around you...
When it comes to Bonnie, her aging is a little intense and thats why people are, lets say...in judgemental awe. I am the same age she is (33) and I still look like 24 without any fancy treatments or whatever...so when I saw her on a picture a while ago, I totally admit that I also went like WTF, is she an alcoholic? I have a friend whos 48 and even she looks younger than Bonnie. We all age differently and sometimes its just...surprising.
Getting old is a privilege. I'm sure the poor girls who were married at 12 or 15 and all the poor men who died at 31 wouldve loved to get older. Because I'd rather look 30 at 20 than get treated like a 30 year old at 12
I think this is why 10,000 people sent Karolina photos of themselves. We knew this was the one 100% judgement-free space on the internet. Thank you for creating that. ❤❤❤
I think it's one thing to have an initial knee-jerk reaction to seeing something unexpected (which is generally normal and fine), but it's another thing to write negative comments and articles about it like it's something that needs to be dissected or discussed in depth. It also probably has something to do with people afraid of aging or feeling old themselves. "If the faces I've considered an integral part of my youth are so different now what does that say about me?"
I agree. In other words, not everything we think needs to be expressed. That's part of being polite - a value that has been neglected in recent years for the sake of "authenticity".
It's funny to me that most of the savage comments against women aging on tik tok are from young women. I think Genz, especially those that are late teens and early twenties have been exposed to filters, photoshop and celebs that get aggressive skin treatments or have had work done for so long that they don't know what the average 32 year old looks like. Developing eye lines and wrinkles is pretty normal in your thirties and not something to be ashamed of.
I’m Gen Z and 100% this is true. I catch myself at 23 sometimes thinking I’m old! It’s crazy! As I child I wanted to be the age I am now for as long as I can remember! It is sad how many people have started thinking like...pedophiles honestly. I was not happy with how I looked at 16 because I was so young looking and baby faced. I received SO much adult male attention then. Way more than I get now. It’s so gross. And lately I’ve been seeing some millenials saying how they’re aging better than Gen Z.... Adding to the problem! Also makes no sense. Everyone needs to realize aging is just a part of life. We need to stop photoshopping everything. It’s distorting brains👀
Could be too that a lot of Gen Z is still young enough that, since UA-cam and smartphone cameras happened in the mid 00s, they've been potential Content pretty much since birth. I've just always figured they've got a different perspective on all of it
Well women lift these young influencers up.
Men don't care what or how women were they make up. They aren't tuning in to see how to shape their eyebrows and what plumper they use.
Theres a reason cosmetics sponsor their content
People are allowed to age.... even women! 😱
I draw the line there
I've been thinking about this for a while and I'm so glad you made a video on it. I saw someone comment (maybe on twitter?) about how Hilary Duff was still looking great at 35 - still??? She's in the literal prime of her life or is about to be, and it's so ridiculous! The most beautiful woman I've ever met was my school principal, who was in her fifties. Men in their fifties are often considered to be in the prime of their lives - think RDJ. These insane obsessions with, and standards for, youth are straight out of Twilight.
More of us need to speak up against ageism. I think it's because of fear of our own mortality.
Honestly, I have been thinking about this and I think it is a skin type issue. People with very fair skin are just not intended to live in places with much sun and it is more damaging than I realized. I recognized this when I started looking at women with pale skin who lived in different places with more or less sun exposure or who were rabid about sunscreen. They literally do not look the same.
^ THIS, same skin type as bonnie, same age, I am a vampire and shun the sun. I still look 20. @@LotusesGalaxyOcean
rajani talks about fat pad damage from the sun and literally most aging is photodamage @@LotusesGalaxyOcean
I'm 53. All my life, I never really had either the money or the patience for expensive treatments and maintenance, let alone Botox. I've inherited good genes from my mum, and I'm allergic to people commenting how I don't "look my age". I mean, what's that even supposed to mean? It's not an achievement to have fewer wrinkles! Some people have chronic pain or go through terrible life events. That kind of thing leaves traces.
I always remind myself that people who say such things are trying to be nice and that their heart is in the right place, so I won't snap at them. But I really, really wish people would start focusing on other things. Ugh
I'll be 59 in February. I get compliments about my relative lack of wrinkles for my age and I don't understand it. It isn't an achievement. I simply drew the lucky lot in the DNA department as far as not having wrinkles. I have a lot of other health problems. I'd give away my smooth skin in a heartbeat not to have those.
I get this all the time and now I'm in my mid-thirties. People say I look like I'm in my mid-twenties, and they're all jealous that I'm thin like no, I'm starving all the time. Because my body just Burns through my food. I'm so sick of them being jealous of me. It's to the point I'm thinking, ma'am.. I'm just doing my job here I don't want your body dismorphia projected on me.
"Bonnie Wright is a 32 year old woman and has a face, therefore her face looks 32 years old." THANK YOU! That's what I've been saying (in my head because no one cares about my opinion). But it's so true. You are your age and therefore look your age. Everyone looks different and so everyone's 32 or 21 or 65 will look different as well.
The reason people talk about her is because she DOES NOT look 32 (33). She looks way older so its a little...lets say surprising. I am 33 too and I also had a little WTF-moment when I saw her. She looks like a woman who drank and smoked alot, not that she really did, but thats not "looking your age". People talk about things that are unusual but that doesnt mean she should be haunted by the media. I have an 48 year old friend and even she looks younger than her and we dont use any kind of fancy treatments. Saying that this is a normal look for a 33 year old woman, just cements the image in peoples heads that after 30, you age like a raisin...thats simply not true but some men will look at this and go "Oh this is what 30+ looks like?...Off the table for dating". She doesnt represent the average 33 year old imo. Also, the more we look around the world, we will see how it depends on race too. East asians look 25 until they hit 45 or something. Its positively crazy...even without all the treatments. Youth and beauty always had a certain value...and it will stay this way. We can complain about it, but thats what it is.
Bonnie Wright is absolutely gorgeous and I hope she doesn't take any of those disgusting comments about her appearance to heart. What, did they expect her to look the same as she did when she was twelve? Absolutely vile.
Saw a comment on a video of Margot Robbie saying that she can’t be beautiful because she’s older than 30. What is even happening to our society
It's wierd how some people look at aging, especially when it's famous women, like it's some sort of crime or just bad and something you can control. Aging is just part of how humans work
Haven't you heard? All women MUST be immortal, otherwise they have committed a terrible sin. 🙃
@@Sly-Moose it does sound like some people really think that way, it's so messed up
Well you see, your appearance actually changes based on the Objective Morality of your thoughts. Haven't you seen those comparison pictures that say "this is how you age when you mind your business" "this is how you age when you are full of hate" etc? You can tell how Good or Bad someone is by looking at their face! This makes sense and is not just repackaged phrenology
@@tensegemstone1394 People function like Disney characters. Got it. 🤣
Normal aging is in fact normal. I agree. But, there is a caveat. We do have some control over how we age because we usually have control of: sun exposure, fitness/weightlifting, body fat percentage [too low is bad], and all the faces you make [the expression you make is the wrinkle you get]. I have found photos of monks who are 90 years old and I will be blunt they age but it looks very different than how most do.
Here is one reason I did not hear mentioned as to why people have strong reactions to how a celebrity ages. When a celebrity we identify with ages well we feel hope that we will also age well. When a celebrity that we identify with ages badly we feel betrayed because of what that means for our mortality. When I read someone that is negative about aging I read that as someone that has trouble with their own aging process. Life is all about loss. We lose our childhood. We lose our fertility. We lose our parents. We lose friends. Eventually we all die. When we are young we see celebrities and as they age they remind us that our budding youth is withering too. We compare ourselves to celebrities. When a celebrity that is our age looks good we internalize that to ourselves. We shouldn't. But we do.
As a 51 year old woman, I noticed eye makeup does not look as attractive on my skin anymore (makes me look cheap) so a more natural look is actually a better choice. I feel makeup at this age can actually make me look older because it settles into my wrinkles.
I just had a similar conversation with my husband. I am 30. Most of my friends are 29-32. All of my friends have started to show signs of aging. Most of us have some fine lines or gray hairs. I think that consuming so much celebrity content makes us forget what women look like when they age naturally. I think social media is especially insidious. We expect people to look their best in films, on TV, and on billboards and glamour shots. However, many celebrities build an Instagram following based on relatability and accessibility. They occasionally juxtapose a close-up of a stretch mark, a patch of cellulite, or a messy countertop next to 20 different images of their filtered and edited face to imply that they’re just like us. Obviously, this is absurd. As a wife and mom of middle class means, I have nothing in common with Taylor swift except the close proximity of our ages. But celebrities can make a lot of money selling the idea that they share our insecurities and perceived shortcomings.
As a teenage girl, I say what's wrong with how Bonnie Wright looks? she's aged, yeah, but it's natural and she hasn't even aged all that much. I would say that her not trying to reverse her natural aging process makes her seem more mature and not desperate to hold onto something she knows she won't be able to keep forever (aka her youth).
If we wanna talk about how she looks, I'd say she looks down to earth and like a genuinely happy person who got a shot at fame and used it to pursue other passions and goals of hers. I would say that Maegan seems like the opposite. Like she believes she has nothing without her youth (which may/may not be true). I think Bonnie gives of "I'd love to sit and chat and have coffee/tea" vibes where Meagan gives off "I'll take a photo with you and then leave my alone" vibes (maybe because I've never seen her smile) and I'd take friendly tea vibes over photo-and-leave vibes any day.
meghan is very funny in interviews, you're missing out
I think people just want to keep her in the harry Potter verse as teen Ginny and they are surprised.
Just because someone doesn't smile, doesn't make them unfriendly. lol Also, resting bitch face is a thing and people who have that are told they are unapproachable, when in reality, they're super nice most of the time! Don't judge people based on how much they smile, it's no different to judging someone by their appearance. Your comment feels very judgemental.
personally, whenever I start to feel bad about how I look (whether it's aging or eurocentric beauty standards), I look at my aunties and other older people in my life who I admire and think are beautiful in their own right, but not only beautiful but caring, smart, talented, and everything else they are. not only does it make me feel better about myself, but it allows me to look at others in a similar way.
The “none of my business” mentality is something that I’ve been trying to internalize, especially when it comes to celebrities. People are going to age, people have things they don’t want to talk about. None of my business.
i'm 24 and my childhood best friend, who (like me) used to be heavily suicidal as a teenager, started getting grey hairs this year. every time i look at her i can only ever be so happy about it. we both lived to see her get grey hairs. i can't imagine seeing this as anything other than the immense victory and privilege it is.
(and while it's not about aesthetics, she looks damn good too)
I actually think Bonnie is someone who's aging beautifully and I love how she doesn't hide her own features. But I think we need to stop judging women by their looks completely.
When I rediscovered her on Instagram a couple years ago I was legitimately surprised by how striking she is. I hadn’t seen a picture or appearance from her since we both had baby face lol and I was just like wow, she’s so beautiful. I totally agree with not judging people on how they age or what they do to their bodies but separate from her as a person, I was legitimately surprised to see people talking bad about Bonnie.
Her face is so pretty and she has such a charming smile. I seriously hope she doesn't let the hate affect her.
My hair has started to go grey and I can't wait till I no longer have to bleach it before getting it to it's correct but unnatural pink!
Society is so hypocritical. Woman gets botox: 'oh my god what has she done to her face, she should be natural'
Woman doesn't have any cosmetic procedures: 'Ew not like that'.
How do women in the media ever freaking win?
Smile and wave. Sometimes just being yourself and being seen is encouragement enough for others to feel free to do so too. I think of it as quiet influence. It's slower but also more deeply felt.
Natural looking make-up and procedures. To hide some ageing and make you look good without making it look like you're trying too hard.
@@Evija3000anne Hathaway for example
@@Jjangbunbun Yeah, there are a haldful that have managed it.
@@Evija3000’Natural looking unnatural things’ LMAOO What? Bonnie looks fine, and Anne has very obviously aged as well.
Aging is amazing. I'm thirty now and I finally don't have body dismorphia. I'm over weight now and my face is starting to drop, and yet for the first time I just don't care. I feel beautiful. As a younger 20 something I was always stressing about how ugly I felt (I was a cute girl but thought I was ugly for some reason) and how fat I was (I was well within my healthy weight range and I guess I felt like I was never skinny enough.) Now I'm thirty, a little over weight, and my face is starting to age a little and I just don't care anymore. I'm so happy just living life and just being me. It's the best feeling ever, and I would never go back to feeling like I was never hot enough. Aging is awesome. It really breaks down your pride and self obsession so you can just be happy with where you are at in the moment.
Hi Karolina - Thank you so much for addressing this. I really appreciate your perspectives always, and this is such an important topic.
I saw that "aged" filter that was going around TikTok several weeks ago and tried it out. I actually loved the way I looked! I looked somewhat like my Nonna (grandmother), and I also looked like I had lived a full life with plenty of ups and downs. And it just made me think: "I should be so lucky!" (Particularly as someone who was severely depressed and passively suicidal for 6+ years during my late teenage years.)
When I was a teenager I always wanted to look older. And then after about age 25 I wanted to look younger. Now I've reached an age where if i go out in public without makeup, people will ask me if I'm not feeling well. No...that's just how my face looks. I like to think I look totally normal and fine for my age, but I don't look 25 anymore and apparently that's a real "fashion don't" for a woman.
Thank you for this video. I'm almost 56. You are 10000% right how people are sooo harsh on women no matter what they do. There's this weird dynamic of "how dare you get old" when people jump on aging celebrities as if people were entitled to see them as they first encountered them for the rest of their lives.
Both Megan and Bonnie face criticism and have her looks scrutinized for the exact same reason: mysoginy. Women aren't allowed to age no matter if they get work done or not. If they choose to age naturally they will get bashed for looking old and "letting themselves go". If they choose to get work done they will be criticized for looking overdone and ruining their looks. Women are allowed to choose what they do to their own bodies and people are not entitled to any explanations. And so sad to always see that women are primarily seen as purely their looks.
Omg I have a genetic condition that means I look really young on the outside. It also causes chronic pain and serious illness to my organs that'll probably end my life young. I would trade this looking young for having a healthier body in an instant. Looking young doesn't equate health, and doesn't equate beauty or wellbeing. this entire conversation drives me nuts, and I couldn't agree more - let people look how they look!!!
What's the name of the condition?
Social media is freaking brutal, man. Even just within our hobby circles with folks who have been around a while. HEAVEN FORBID people get older, gain weight, have kids, whatever. I’m glad you showed Bette Davis because she really embraced where she was at and continued to be a freaking amazing actress. That’s more admirable to me than having to be “forever young.”
Very timely. I remember when I was a teen back in the early 70s and hearing someone talk about how the actress Angie Dickenson had "let herself go" when she turned 40. I also remember someone saying "40 just kicked her in the face." I asked my mom about it and she said something about when a woman in Hollywood turned 40 their chances of getting good parts diminished. And now I see actresses in their 50s and 60s still getting good roles. I mean look at Jamie Lee Curtis and Michelle Yeoh getting Oscars at the last Academy Awards. Jamie just turned 65 and Michelle is in her 50s. So some things are changing, I've seen it in my lifetime, and I'm 69. I'll bet that most of the a$$h*les saying this crap are all Dude-Bros who are still living in their parents basement and couldn't get a woman to look at them.
I have been the same height and weight since 13ish, started graying at 20ish, still had acne at 25, slid down the Covid mental health chute through 27-28, wondered if I should get fillers because stress aged me to my actual age by 29, got breast cancer at 30, in remission from that and not giving a flying fuck about my wrinkles and grey hairs and asymmetrical nose at 31. I intend to be 40,50,60,70 and so wrinkly and ugly that I scare kids at Halloween because it’ll mean I’m still there and I’ve lived and learned.
The only reason I get, not upset, that's not the right word, rather shocked, is because when I see those types of people whom I "met" through XYZ movie/show/whatever media for the first time, I was also younger, and now seeing them grown up and older, it means time has passed for me as well, and that kind of depresses me. So, to me, it's not this ridiculous rage against aging, it's the inevitable truth that time passes by for all 😅
ohghh......my meds just kicked in and im getting so emotional about how beauty is this big evil machine that makes us feel bad about ourselves and we are all so beautiful and desireable and we keep being lied to by everyone
relatable
Aging will never be as scary as what people feel pressured to do about it.
As a baby-faced 40YO who got her first grey hair last year I agree. I don't look that way because I'm doing something "better" than the others, I'm looking that way because of genetics. The same genetics that gave me PKOS, made me fat and will probably make me look instantly older as soon as I get menopaused.
I have PCOS too and a thyroid that killed itself when I hit my teens. Eating disorders and decades of weight cycling ensured I'd end up being heavy. Stupid doctors don't even look at my chart to see what health issues I have, they just start in on me about my size even though that isn't why I came to them. My son had an EMS instructor who said "Treat the patient, not the chart" and I wish doctors would do that! On the other hand, I get compliments for having nearly line-free skin at 58 years old, and I don't understand it. I didn't do anything to accomplish this except for hitting the DNA lottery in the smooth skin department. I'm not even particularly good at moisturizing.
As Carrie Fisher said, youth and beauty aren't accomplishments. They are accidents of time and DNA.
A (male) ex-friend once parted with this infinite wisdom: "Men age like wine, women age like milk."
I'm so happy that person is no longer in my life.
It's kinda true though 🥲 our hormones quit on us MUCH faster compared to men.
@@DelightfulDissident that may be so, but does it mean we have less value? Wine is more valuable than milk. Wine tastes better as it ages. Maybe men age slower, but does that mean that when they do show the same signs of age as a woman, that their value is increased?
@@DelightfulDissidentLmao women look much younger
@@DelightfulDissident Sorry, but according to biology, they experience approximately the same decline in hormones. This is 35 years...
Aging as a woman. Otherwise known as slowly turning invisible to the outside world... typed as a 55 year old. That being said, aging is a privilege not to be taken for granted. Go out and thusly shake yon tail feathers...
- Cathy (&, accidently, Steve), Ottawa/Bytown/Pimisi
It can be a mindfuck. It's not about cute crow's feet around the eyes. My neck and jaw have changed. I have much less hair. If I had as much as I had 15 years ago but it was gray.. I would have NO problem with it. Fat distribution has changed, and not in a good way, imo. (I'm not overweight) I want my hourglass/badass figure and big eyes back. Or maybe not.
It looks as if women in their late 20's may be in for a rough ride, unless perhaps women our age (GenXers) are brave enough to break the cycle.
@@auntiegravity7713 What the 'kids' have to navigate now, between photo filters and fillers - it's beyond a mind bend.
And, yeah, it looks like the world has finally cooked up a collective project for us Gen X Women to collaborate on. Aging with attitude. Figures. At least we still have the 80 & 90 yr old's to look to for advice and reassurance...
Hug your stretch marks people - they are proof that you have been here.
(and, as far as hair goes, I did not participate in Movember... you are welcome... le sigh... I can grow a goatee... absolutely ridiculous... humbug!)
Actually I think I saw you on Bank Street last week!
LOL... probably. Sorry I missed seeing you. How did the garden grow for you this year? We got some nice tomatoes out of the balcony garden from your plants... thanks again.@@bunhelsingslegacy3549
I actually like the turning invisible part of aging. (I'll be 59 in February.) I wasn't at all sorry to say goodbye to gross creepers catcalling out of car windows. Sadly, it doesn't stop men old enough to be my father from hitting on me even though I dress like I just got out of bed after sleeping in my clothes. Men gonna men.
Tbh I think that Bonnie ages like a fine wine, her face gets amazing features and glow and just catches an eye.
Honestly I when all this discussion about Bonnie came up I only looked up recent pictures of her and was blown away how pretty she is. She looks so confident and fresh, not like a child but like a woman. I love how she smiles and how much the soft little wrinkles give her character. Look at her eyes, it even looks like eyeliner wings, but she has it naturally!
I’m 26 and I got my first gray hair when I was 18. I’m honestly excited to be an old lady and it makes me sad that people get so worked up over age. I have a 33 year old coworker who is always bemoaning how OLD she is and it’s like… you’re still YOUNG! I’m still a child! Like, there’s so much more to worry about than the natural course our bodies take over time. I think it hurts me most when my mom gets really insecure about how “old” she’s looking, because she is honestly stunning. But she just can’t see it, even though I constantly try to remind her.
I've already decided to embrace aging as it naturally happens, but the pressure on women to look or not look all sorts of ways as they get older already feels overwhelming sometimes. I'm only 27, but I'm already noticing the beginning of wrinkles and started to get more frequent white hairs. And tbh I do feel very self conscious about it. But I want to be part of the movement that changes these pressures on women. So I personally don't plan to dye my hair when the whites and grays become more noticeable, and I already stopped wearing makeup regularly earlier this year. If people want to dye their hair or wear makeup, that's fine. The difference is feeling like you have to vs wanting to. The only anti-aging thing I'm committed to is a good skincare routine and daily SPF, haha.
During your day to day, pay attention women and note how they look. The real world is full of aging women. I feel better about aging.
*SPF fistbump*
SPF, full body physiotherapy maintenance ,and flossing, those are my anti-aging commitments. Thank you for wanting to be part of the movement to change the pressures on us when according to "society" there's literally no way to do it right, you're either artificial or have let yourself go.
That sounds like a healthy mindset to get into, but more so for your mental health. Which in the long term is so much more valuable. I'm 30 now and also started questioning myself over how I want to age at 27. I gym pretty hard, but not because I want to be skinny I just want to appreciate my body while it's still working well. And also mental health haha. I feel any steps a person takes to question what is important to them and what is just influences from the outside world will always lead to being a more confident and comfortable person. Good luck with your journey x
I grew up hearing my mom joke she knew exactly how she was going to age because she looked just like her mom, my grandma, who also looked just like her mom, my great-grandma. As a result, I've never felt this intense need to stay youthful looking. I think that sort of view, that our features or how we age is part of our inheritance from the generations that came before just gets lost nowadays as we constantly compare ourselves to random strangers. I may never have met my great great great-grandmother, but I can look at the photos we have of her and see her descendants, including the way their features changed as the years went on.
Beautiful! 💚
I've never heard an explanation that fully accounts for the discomfort/anger that results when a woman dares to age. My best guess is it's multifactorial, but primarily comes down to two issues: fear of our own mortality, and misogyny. It's jarring when you realize a decade has passed since you last saw a celebrity, but it didn't feel like any time at all, so the fact that they look older reminds us we're aging too. For women, it reminds us that we've only got like a 10-year window in which we have influence and worth in society, because women are still primarily valued for how attractive they are to men - and men value youth above all else. For men, I think it reminds them of their own mortality, but they're also angry because on some level they feel that the woman aged ON PURPOSE, or else could have prevented it if she'd tried harder, and now she's broken the unspoken social contract that a woman who is not just out of childhood and super hot should quietly recede into obscurity. A lot of women comment on how they seemed to disappear when they hit their 40s; they became invisible to society.
I think in the case of celebrities, like Karolina said, we're used to seeing them in a carefully curated, flattering wardrobe, hair and makeup professionally done at all times, lighting and photoshop and careful posing. This actress (Bonnie?) wears casual stuff and seems to have minimal makeup most of the time. I guarantee with professional lighting, wardrobe, hair, makeup, posing, and everything most celebs use, the comments would have been way different. Part of the problem is people don't realize what women look like without makeup and an army of aestheticians.
I'm 40 and I'm still getting spots.
I have sympathy for women in the public eye who have to deal with this. And it's frustrating that there is a double standard and men are not subjected to the same.
However, I do get a bit annoyed when they have financial interests in some sort of anti-aging product - either an actual product, or a general 'wellness' thing - and then don't tell the truth about the procedures they have. Or when they pretend not to photoshop their images. That is very dishonest in my opinion and does a lot of harm. They are presenting results that you literally can't achieve.
At one point I asked my mother when I would stop getting spots - since we have more or less the same skin type. Hopefully after 65 she said...
Sorry to disappoint you, but take it from a 70 year old who still gets spots, it doesn't seem to get any better!
I work in a funeral home and it’s given me so much more perspective on aging. When we get cases who have passed in their 30s 40s and even 50s they’re all considered young. There is so much life to live beyond your 20s
Thanks! Have a wonderful Christmas and great new year. Here is a star for your tree⭐
thank you! Merry Christmas to you too 🎄
I would like to say something witty, but I guess good feelings count too@ ❤
I’ve had gray hairs since I was in the 6th grade. I’ve maintained a skincare routine since I was 17, which is why a lot of people think I’m younger, because I’ve managed to slow aging from wearing sunscreen regularly. But if you look at my hair it’s basically 50% gray and I’m not considering dying it because it does remind me I’m getting older. Gray hair is not a problem, it’s actually because of genetics that hair grays differently for everyone.
The differences between when people go gray is crazy. My younger sister got grays at 25. I’m 30 without a gray in sight. It is one of the easier physical attributes to fix if you want to. (No need for plastic surgery or weight loss. Just a dye job.) But I imagine that might also be a pain if you’re not into dying your hair for fun. ❤
@@laurenconrad1799 I'd like to try dying my hair, I just don't want to maintain it 😅
Oh yeah, greying sure is genetic. My paternal grandmother was completely white at 30. I'm not quite 50 but have more white hair than my dad did at 52 when he died but my dad's brother was completely white by 50.
My mom's cousin visted recently and he's in his 70s and I've got significantly more grey hair than he does. I had more white hair than the mother of one of my boyfriends when I was in university, though his dad was completely white and he and I had similar greying even though he was two years younger than me. I do dye my hair, but because I like how I look with blue and purple streaks, not cause I'm trying to cover the grey. In fact I leave the whitest parts (behnd my ears) completely au naturel for fun colour differentiation!
I was visiting with friends this weekend and we're all within two years of each other, and two of us are more than 50% grey, the other two are still the same hair colour they had in high school, no dye. I've been going grey since 18, but my husband who's only a month and a half younger than me has only just this year started to get a few white hairs at his temples, though his beard's been showing white streaks for the last decade or so. Same with most of our male friends, just the faintest scattering of silver for most of them, though to be fair a few of them go cueball now so I can't say for certain that I'm the greyest in my group of friends, just that I'm the greyest of those who have hair...
That sounds like a pretty cool combo, I hope I'm heading in a similar direction, I'm 30 and I still occasionally get ID'd for energy drinks. Lately even though my skin is mostly fine(if you ignore the stupid dermatitis) I've been trying out anti-ageing stuff since it seems like most men just don't and I find it interesting.
I don't actually care how people view me but I wanna see how long I can get ID'd for!
I started greying at 16. I love my silver hair! It’s thicker & wavy.
People have never been able to guess my age. They get it wrong in both directions, starting as a teen.
This made me realize that in general society is very stupid and wants to do things it is not capable of, and not mind its own business. 😂
What’s wild is that when I was a preteen adults thought I was old enough to drive but now that I’m 21 and finally got my breast reduction people are surprised when I say I can drink. I’ve learned that no one knows what a face looks like. Especially a woman’s face.
Society is indeed full of idiots. I get mistaken for a kid due to my smaller height, small hands and young face, when I'm infact 29 years old. It's only when I put on makeup do people see that I'm an adult; Of course, I wear makeup purely because I want to and because it's fun, not to impress others, but still, it's annoying that people are so stupid and biased. Why are people like that? Ugh.
I like to think that other people's aging reminds them of their own mortality and it makes them uncomfortable.
Personally, botox faces make me so much more uncomfortable
Nah, being mortal is not the problem...losing beauty is. I dont wanna be immortal and I am not scared of death (not the end anyway), but if I could freeze my look right now I would. Not even for someone else. I just like what I see in the mirror, I am grateful for it and appreaciate it every day for the creation it is...I see it as a blessing. Its just natural that we love aesthetic things and wanna keep them.
“[…] because we don’t get to tell people how they should age.”
AMEN!
Bold words from the ageless immortal who hasn't changed since 1643
I am also 32. I got married and had kids young, and until literally this year, I kept getting people assuming I was the nanny when I went to school pickup. It's really nice to finally be treated like a grown-up. But I do have a baby face, and I come from a family of baby-faces. My parents are in their late sixties and look a decade younger. My siblings each have stories about having to pursade people that they were actually adults, like when my brother got pulled over at 26 after coming out of a liquor store by a cop who assumed he was underage. Meanwhile, my husband frequently doesn't get carded at restaurants, and that's been the case since he turned 21. His two brothers were completely bald on top before they turned 30. He still has hair, but it's thin and we know the years are numbered. Genes are weird. Faces are weird. And that's wonderful.
Sweet. Baby. Jesus. Both of these women still look SO. YOUNG. What do people think they want!?!? I am 44, almost 45. My hair is completely grey. My body has been through childbirth and almost twenty years of marriage. If I looked a fraction of how lovely either of these individuals look, I would feel like Aphrodite. The internet needs to get its shit together.
When I saw this video pop up, I knew exactly what it was going to be about, because I saw the same thing and I was disgusted. I called multiple people out for it and was just met with a complete lack of empathy, and told that it was basically fair game to hassle a woman for aging naturally. In a world so obsessed with aging and horrified at the thought of a wrinkle (we have young women using Botox, fillers with anti aging skincare routines), I do despair sometimes. I'm 38 now and the struggle to block out all that noise is REAL.
The fact that the media has been feeding us pictures of celebrities photoshopped to perfection for our whole lives also plays a big role in this. We want to think that oh, it's 2023 and things are different now because more and more people show their faces online without filters etc. but reactions like those you mentioned show that changing people's mentality will always be the longest battle
I almost checked out permanently at age 20, so every time I have a birthday now I'm like wow, I'm really still here, that's awesome. I'm 35 now and I have a good bit of gray hair. I actually love it! It sparkles in the sun like tinsel. I wish it would all go so I could dye it crazy colors without having to bleach first!
My mom is one of those women who won't speak of her age and gets mad when I celebrate her birthday and that makes me so sad. I wish women weren't made to feel bad just for getting older.
I know this wasn’t exactly the point of your comment but thanks for the little reminder that someday I’ll be so grateful I didn’t check out permanently now. Your comment is worded beautifully.
How People Are Aging Is None of Our Business-I agree 100% with you Karolina as aging is only natural and unavoidable. Good video!
I actually like seeing actresses age naturally. I think Bonnie Wright looks amazing and I dont understand why people dont like seeing people age.
The thumbnail is iconic
It's a mental hurdle for sure. Nasty people with awful opinions and inconsiderately commending on your life does not help.
I remember throughout my teen years to 24-25. I always felt insecure or self conscious... I slapped on make-up, curled/ styled my hair everyday, made sure I had my hair done pretty, painted my nails, always wore new-ish "trendy" clothes, was overly obsessed with my figure and face (thought of this way too often throughout the day), was unkind to myself and had eating disorders. I took pictures and pretended (masked) that I was happy and content.
From 25 to now 31 my daily efforts are self care, my health, wellbeing, mindfullness, self kindness, and my abilities. Being more myself, more self aware and truly happy with who I am. I remind myself daily of how far I've come.
I dislike wearing makeup because of the feeling on my skin. Have my hair as I want it and barely ever heat it or style it, I wear clothes for comfort over everything else, and I don't care for trends (because they are wasteful, they alter, and pass).
I look forward to changing, developing and aging from a healthy perspective, no longer dreading change in any way because of unattainable beauty standards.
"The Media" brain washes society to believing beauty is more important than anything, to control people (especially Women).
It is entirely wrong, living a fufilled life as you desire is the top priority.
Anyone who judges your life and how you live it can honestly f*** off and go judge their own life. Do some much needed self reflection. 😂
I didn’t follow „Ginny’s” career , but it’s heartwarming to hear that actress from my childhood seems to have grown into happy and accomplished person - that’s the only thing that matters to me.
Also, I’m 21 years old and based on my present looks, I’m guessing that I may start aging a bit quicker than my peers in incoming years. Thank you for this reasonable video (and similar comment section) - I’m not particularly insecure about my looks anymore, but it was still nice to hear.
I work in assisted living and get to see all the good and bad that comes with aging, and there definitely *is* a lot of good with the bad! I also lost my husband a few years ago just shy of his 40th birthday and I would give just about anything to be able to experience growing older with him. Like others have said here, we really need to remember that aging is a privilege!
Bonnie is a beautiful woman. I love that she doesnt hide her smile lines, her expressions, of years of emotions no matter how happy or sad.
Unmentioned was Maggie Smith. She's been/looked old *forever* but her agedness looks incredible! And she is just so amazing!
Finally someone speaks out. Some people are so rude to Bonnie Wright. She looks her age. People need to be a bit more realistic. I bet most mean commenters also look their age instead of looking like a photoshopped instagram model
We are so afraid of aging and death, we put so many resources in prolonging life far beyond what our bodies are programmed for instead of resources for dignified aging, dying and support with coming to terms with aging and death, and making sure people in their old age aren’t getting lonely and depressed.
There's also another thing where *some individuals (apparently) age early, and then immediately stop looking older:*
so basically *those who just look 50 forever!*
My mom was a redhead and Bonnie is aging so beautifully and with grace just like my mom did
I got my first gray hair when I was 12…but at 42 I still occasionally get carded. So even within a person aging isn’t always on the same track. I try never to judge age by looks and go with behavior if I can
As someone who is around Bonnies age and always thought my lines on my forhead are not normal for someone my age she makes me feel a lot better. She is so beautiful, the lines dont matter. My skin is also very fair
I think it truly shows how obsessed we are with looking good and also shows where our value lies. There’s no more beauty inwardly. Our young girls are looking at tik tok people and aren’t being reminded of where beauty comes from
Great video! I think it’s also an issue with some celebrities of them just looking “different” than what we remember. If you’ve just watched Harry Potter for the 100th time and see a picture of any of the cast now, you’re going to be like “hey, they don’t look like they did 5 minutes ago! How did that happen?” Our society moves so fast that we forget the age of some of the media we consume - and it unfortunately immortalizes the people who starred in them, instead of allowing them to grow and change. ❤
That's true. Our brains (at least the subconscious parts) have trouble distinguishing between a real memory and something seen on screen. Especially now that so much of our time is spent on screens, it's no wonder we're losing our grip on reality.
@@erikabutterfly BIG facts!!
It's really upsetting how we are treated as we age 😢 women seem to never be enough. I'm so fed up with it. I'm 45 and I literally became invisible 10 years ago. Then trying to keep my "beauty/young appearance" has become exhausting and a losed battle to be honest. I just don't care anymore. It feels much better. Love yourself as you are. Embrace aging and be grateful you get to have a long life ❤
My mom (who’s 43, not old per se but she does have a fair amount of wrinkles) always thinks it’s silly when people around her are terrified to age or tell people how old they really are. She says she knows much more and she’s happier than she was in her 20s. She’s proud of her age and I’m happy to have a role model like her :)
Karolina's rants just get me GOING, like right after watching them I just get sooooo much done!
Aging is sooo different for everyone and we should celebrate it. I had my first grey hairs when I was so young - 21 years old and I was sooo scared because of that, I thought that maybe I will get menopause soonxD. Ten years later I have like 1/4 of my hair grey but besides of that I look very youthful, people still think that I'm a student. After all I am glad of having my grey hairs that fast - after first shock and terror - concept of aging stopped being scary for me - that is a long, long process that is making me being me.
I could not love this video enough. About 10 minutes ago I essentially wrote a comment addressing this exact issue, on a video about Jennifer Lawrence's plastic surgery. I'm 51, and aging is difficult for me. This was freeing to watch. Thank you!