How Attachment Styles Impact Your Relationships and Mental Health
Вставка
- Опубліковано 8 вер 2024
- Addressing your attachment style and how it impacts your ability to connect, bond and relate can be incredibly helpful for your healing and freedom. Our mental health is deeply impacted by our relational world: how we experience relationships, how well we are equipped in relationships and how we relate to God, ourselves and the world around us.
Some aspects of how we relate are wonderful-they bless others and enhance our internal world of thoughts and emotions. But there are ways that we relate that are not healthy or unhelpful for the journey.
Recognizing your relationship struggles can often lead us back to how well we bonded and relationally attached in our childhood.
Do you find yourself running into the same relational patterns that work against you? It may help for you to understand something called attachment style that can help you understand how you connect in relationships, that stems from your early childhood bonds.
Get The OCD Healing Journey Book Today: markdejesus.co...
Get a FREE eBook on the Father’s Love: bit.ly/3fGu6t3
Mark's resource library: markdejesus.co...
Support future videos: markdejesus.co...
Join the Healing and Freedom Community: markdejesus.co...
Mark's books: markdejesus.co...
Music Provided by Epidemic Sound: share.epidemic... and Audiio: ref.audiio.com...
Disclaimer: The content published is for informational purposes. The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It is purely educational in nature. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your condition. Never disregard professional advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read, heard or viewed in our material.
The resources given are not designed to practice medicine or give professional medical advice, including, without limitation, medical direction concerning someone's medical and mental health. Any resources given are not to be considered complete and does not cover all issues related to mental and physical health. In addition, any information given should not replace consultation with your doctor or any other mental health providers and/or specialists.
Definitely anxious/avoidant attachment here! I’ve even thought about how that effects my relationship with God and if having an anxious/avoidant attachment to God is a thing
Yes!! I definitely agree I think it also the way we communicate with God.
Youre not the only one bud
Same, and it absolutely does! ‘Fit for the most high” has a free masterclass on it here on UA-cam! Very valuable info ❤
11 minutes in and I'm already sighing and feeling down. It's not that Mark is saying anything wrong here, it's just that I'm realising I have a long long way to go. My mother joking that her and I were not as close as she was with my siblings, because we didnt have skin to skin contact when I was born, and my siblings did was... a lot. I laughed at the time, but I'm not now. It's so hard to forgive and move forward. I don't even know HOW to let go.
Edit: Just wanted to say thank you very much for all you do Mark. You're a great youtube big bro haha 😊
You are not alone, I feel the same. I know things were done wrong to me and I’ve cried, and I’ve forgiven, and I’ve cried again. But what does this healing even look like? It seems so elusive… HOW does one even feel that or go through that. I’m tired of things in childhood affecting me that I already want to “let go” of. I’m trying, but it still hurts. Sigh.
You can do it my fellow sister, we can do everything through Christ, no matter how long it takes he will give you peace and joy through it. He is healing you only by knowing that you need it. He did tremendous healing in my life through Marks ministry so do not lose hope sister and be courageous and brave as the Lord says in his word and the most important is the relationship with our Heavenly Father and studying his word ❤
@@DadinChrist thanks for your encouragement 🙏 😊
@Nicole-un5on we're gonna get through this. God will get us through it ❤️
You are not alone, there are so many of us
Thank you again for your help in real life situations. I am definitely an anxious avoider. Especially in abandonment. Your videos on God's grace and love have helped tremendously in my healing process. If someone was mad at me (especially my wife) it was my fault and I needed to fix it so their anger would stop and they would accept me again. More and more that is getting less and less. Thank you!!
Anxious attachment here! This video has been so helpful. I have often wondered how my attachment style prevents me from connecting to God because I don’t know any other way to be. But I am now unlearning a lot from my childhood and have faith I will one day be securely attached.
Thank you for this Mark🙏🏽🙏🏽
Great video as always! Didn‘t regret liking it before watching it. Thank you Mark
This message has been so timely, I needed this today. Thank you Mark!
This video is so need and so on time. I’ve been asking God to help me relate to others differently. Then I come across this video. Mark, my brother from another mother, thank you 🙌🏾. I got work to do. #feelinghopeful
Here's my own proof that what you're saying is true. I'm 66 now when I was a toddler in Brooklyn my sister (18 months older, died young, plagued with mental illness/voices/drugs alcohol) & I were repeatedly sent to a babysitter in the building & my sister was molested. My only memory is the sitter telling me to hold my face down on the coffee table, I'm guessing so I didn't see. Yet it was traumatic for both of us. We were also alone at home in our room ROCKING all the time when small. My earliest memory was mastering picking things up with my hands & at the SAME TIME thinking I would have to make it on MY OWN. You can guess which category I fit into just from that limited info. I have a trail of self destruction behind me & three grown children who I'm starting to realize I've done more damage to than I ever thought. I thought I was okay when I came to Christ years ago, but I now know that I WASN'T, & now God graciously led me to you, the clearest stuff I've ever heard that hits home and rings so true, & I've had tons of therapy for decades. HINT: Therapy was like movie auditions for me or being on the witness stand. I was always admired & given great chances of making it. I was able to fly under the radar without realizing thats what I was doing. No guilt trips. No more false or exaggerated guilt. I'm just saying. One of the few friends I have left ordered the book God loves me & I love myself when I asked her to bc I had no money. I've been reading it & tho I first felt terrified, I"ve been practicing receiving God's love & I guess I'm off to a good start!
💖🙏
@@GodsGrace758 I am excited for you.
Bless your heart honey! Listen you’re GONNA make it!
Praying for you and sending much love from your sister in Christ! God‘s got you!❤
Mark. This was so needed. As my daughter very cruelly reminded me that her need for a man "came from me."
I, as you know, am a senior and me (and my adult child) can only go forward. Not backward. I have apologized.
Thank you.
I too "liked" it just from the title!!
Thank you for this Mark. I recently did some research on attachment styles and i relate to “dis-organized attachment” whew now I’m just learning.
This is so good.
This was great thanks!!
Mark this is so GOOD!!
Brings it all together WOW!!!
Christian Attachment Coach here!
Just want to encourage everyone going through attachment issues. There is no such thing as a perfectly secure person. It’s a spectrum. I identify with disorganized and understand both avoidant and anxious.
A secure attachment is recognized by healthy communication.
Bless you all and thank you Mark.
Feel free to ask any questions:
Love this, Thank you for sharing!!! Very helpful!
Praise God we do not have to fear or avoid human beings and relationships, instead we can enjoy them better through our healing and connecting with God, thank you so much Lord ❤! I therefore bind one to desire to have a secure attachment style while binding to hell every lack of desire of having a secure attachment style in my life, the lives of my family, friends, colleagues, neighbours, acquitances, opponents, the children I teach and the body of Christ, binding to hell every unequal yoke and common share with anyone lacking a desire for having a secure attachment style, in accordance with this word and provetbs 3:5-6, acts 9:31, genesis 2:24, 2 corinthians 6:14-18 in the name and blood of Jesus Christ, amen and hallelujah, glory to God ❤!
I have grown in charity organization. There i lived with emotional neglact. This got inmpact when i become full grwon and entered into adult life. I was unequiped in dealing relationship.
Starting following ur contentent i am seeing many changes how to deal with myself and people around me.
God bless u mark.
This helped me and my journey. Just started reading your book on Rejection Mindset. So far it is very enlightening and helping me understand myself better. Thank you Pastor Mark. 🙂
I've determined I'm avoidant, maybe disorganized. This was helpful to me.
Hey Mark! Do you reckon it'd be a good idea to release your "God loves me and I love myself" book in Spanish too? I'm sure you'd have a huge audience since there's a big Christian community that speaks Spanish. It's been a great help for me so far
My wife is an avoidant. I was never an anxious person until her. I don't think anyone has a particular attachment style. I think it all depends on the dynamic you're in. If my wife connected with me, I would not be anxious. But no matter what I do she's always gonna be avoidant.
Nope. No bonding with either parent. Anxious avoidant here.
Youre not alone bud
What do you call it if you show signs of all types of attachment?
I am 66 years old and I don't know what a healthy relationship looks like. I was a lousy parent. A lousy wife. I am a miserable Trainwreck.
No shame only learning. Don’t be so hard on yourself, each day you wake up is another chance❤
Thank you. That's kind of you.
@@user-zu9bx6fz5b I'm a 33 year old daughter.
My mom died at 60. I wish she was alive for me to tell her what I'm about to tell you.
She didn't know how to have a healthy relationship either and caused a lot of damage in my life. Thankfully, my now- 70- year old father has been open to learning about Attachment and as he, myself, and my siblings have all worked hard to heal, there has been incredible change in our lives. My 70 year old dad is changing the legacy of his family now- 70 years into his life.
Mother, it wasn't your fault that no one demonstrated to you as a child what a healthy relationship looks like, and that all your adult life you were just trying to manage with the limited tools you had. You did the best you could with what you knew then.
Don't you know your kids want to forgive you? Don't you know your kids want to love you? Don't you know the people on this earth who love you want to know who you really are?
You're not dead yet, thank God. It's not too late to decide that you want to bring healing into your own life and your kid's lives. Even if they don't receive it, it's not too late to apologize to them (to anyone you've hurt).
But I can tell you right now, the most important person you need to apologize to is yourself. Why have you treated yourself like you aren't worth loving? Yeah, yeah, I know "what you've done." But you could forgive someone else for that, right? Why not your self? You are equal to everyone else. Equally worthy of forgiveness and love because of Jesus. Or is His blood not enough?
Everyone makes mistakes and has caused harm. You MUST forgive yourself how Jesus does, accept yourself how Jesus does, love yourself how Jesus does, so that you can love others and allow them to love you back.
It starts with you. You're 66 and you still have another lifetime on this earth. Why not make it the best years of your life? Why not make the legacy of your family one of healing, redemption, and transformation?
You have more power than you know, beloved mother. Your kids may be grown, but they still need you.
I believe in your ability to change, daughter, mother, wife, sister. Go ahead- be who you were meant to be. If you're still alive, it's not too late.
You can still change everything.
It's so easy to listen to something like this and feel condemnation, we're all trying friend.
No one's perfect. I'm certainly not.❤
@@Ecclesiastes3v11 Absolutely; we have a loving Saviour who cares about us so much despite our struggles. ❤
Hey mark I have a question does the Holy Spirit tell us to pray or spread gospel to someone because I saw TikTok’s. And I fear that I am going to get that thought and if I don’t do it I feel guilt. I’m starving the compulsion o. Doing good works but this thought make me feels like if I get the thought from Holy Spirit I have to go back to compulsion pls help I’m young and this has been causeing ,e to ruminate
It's like being pulled into a fake outer darkness, and no one can save you. It feels like "dang, if this is God, then I'm doomed, and no one can save me because who's higher than God?" Literally, when I'm in themes, I can't see months ahead. All I can see is this "theme." Even when I try to mentally picture months ahead, I can't see my family, work, relationships, nothing but that theme. It feels like absolute doom. It seems like it won't stop unless I do it, but even when I do to some degree, it comes back, and the cycle starts over again. Some days, I just lay in my bed, wishing to be an animal of some sort like a bird or ant because then "maybe I wouldn't have to deal with human consciousness and issues. Maybe then I wouldn't have to deal with what comes with having a soul. " It's crazy. If you share my sentiments, then I am so sorry you're going through this. I was about to go to sleep but I just wanted to say this so you wouldn't feel alone. I know how it is to be going through something, and you don't hear back from anyone, and you're just wondering if you're making things up in your head or legit experiencing this. Well, you are. 🙏 Hold on in there, okay? ❤
🙏🏿