I really struggle with OCD and religious scrupulosity. I constantly get the obsessive thought that the only way I can truly make the Lord happy is by joining a convent even though I have no desire to be a nun. For a while I kept saying "God, make my will align with yours" expecting him to transform my heart to desire becoming a nun but it never happened. I have always had a strong desire to be a mother and feel a sense of peace when I picture myself with a big family some day. I went to friends and family and spiritual directors and I was becoming upset because I thought I was doing a bad job at listening to God. It was a mess. I was so unhappy and walking on eggshells with everything I did. I have developed the practice of saying "God, I offer this up to you. Every moment. All the time." It helps me to release myself from the burden of my own anxieties. I constantly pray for peace. He always provides. I try to ask him to help me live in the moment so that I can just serve him as best as I can in the present. Another note I have gotten about questioning the future is "Maybe I will- maybe I won't." because the reality is that worrying about the future separates us from the gift of the present.
Great insight. This is very helpful and I hope you get better with your OCD and scrupulosity. I hope you become a mother one day. God bless you and your family. ❤️💕🙏🏽
It’s truly a struggle. OCD and scrupulosity can ruin one’s viewpoint of the Faith and God. It’s vitally important to seek help for it whenever possible
6 years ago (junior year/senior year of HS) I had a spell of sexual intrusive thoughts about my mother who i saw everyday and i started to panic every time i saw her, i broke down crying and told my dad i was going crazy without going into detail. Felt so lonely. Thank God i found a secular psychologist UA-cam bloke talk about intrusive thoughts, it changed everything. This video is a Catholic version, much appreciated🙏🏼💙💙💙
I'm currently seeking advice from a wonderful priest on dealing with scrupulosity. For anybody who doesn't understand this, please be aware of how truly, utterly, awfully and completely debilitating this disease is, and please pray for us. Stealing God's peace from our hearts is one of the demonic's most powerful weapons, and this is what the scrupulous person faces every day.
The consequence of sin is death. Jesus died instead of sinners. So there is no eternal death that waits for you. The death was defeated. God loves you.
@@loveandideasthe Scrupulous person (like me) knows this but our brains just aren’t matching that. That’s why we have to just let those thoughts pass by.
my jaw dropped listening to these two people just talk so accurately and casually about something that i thought i had been struggling with alone. i’ve seen so many videos on scrupulosity, but this one was the first one that truly made me feel like my thought process was understood. also, to see people in the comments sharing their battles and hopes with scrupulosity reminds me that not only do we have more in common than we think, but that we should also be talking about this topic more, reaching out to one another, and praying for each other. thank you guys for starting this conversation and reminding me that God loves us no matter our struggles. God bless you all :)
St Therese of Lisieux, St Alphonsus Ligueri, etc. had Scrupulosity, but by the Grace of God , they overcame . Through The Lord , we have endless possibilities
As a scrupulous person, it made me feel good to hear them laugh about it! In turn it helped me laugh at myself and realize how small my scrupulosity is on the grand scale of things.
On May 16th of this year, my fiance and I had a very direct experience of St Ubald. He is a little known saint and the patron of those with OCD, Autism and against demonic possession. Because of our experience I am seeking to spread devotion to him. Ora Pro Nobis
One of the things that has helped with my OCD is finding out through books and therapy that when I’m distressed about a thought, particularly violent intrusive thoughts, it’s because I will not act on those thoughts. The fact that they are distressing to me means that I’m a good person and will not act on that thought and I can just let it pass. That’s been super helpful for me to know
This video has been added to my favorites! I really needed this. I have trouble with scrupulosity. And now I have the comfort of knowing I'm not the only one who fears I've done my penance wrong after confession.
This was a really good video. I definitely deal with scrupulosity and have had some success managing it. For anyone who deals with this, here is what has helped me the most: 1. Your thoughts are like boats floating down a river. You notice each one, but you always have the choice to get on the boat or just let it keep going. You can’t stop what pops into your head, seriously, that’s not the answer. Just let them to continue floating down the river. Your duty is NOT to reject every bad one lol 2. Stress. You have too much stress. When a thought pops into your mind you get anxious about it, so anxious about it that you feel horrible when they come. THAT is what you should try and stop. So if you want to serve God truly, let go of your anxiety and go for a walk. Or just lay in bed and do nothing for 30 minutes to relax. The thoughts hurt when you are stressed, that’s what you need to manage 3. Who is our God?... certainly not a Father who counts the number of times we say sorry compulsively. Our anxiety alot of times comes from not understanding who God is. He is not a hard cruel God who we must follow all of his commands like slaves. We end up pinning OUR ANXIOUS SCRUPULOUSITY on God and see God as the things that we are. He doesn’t see you like that. So ask him for healing to see His heart for who he truly is. Also, watch therapist videos on UA-cam. There is one called, “the catholic therapist” and another i like is Katie d’ath i think. The thing i have to stress(ironic word choice) the most with this, is that you don’t have to feel stress about these things to love God. He’s not that kind of Dad
From Brazil here. Man, this video was like a light in the dark for me. I'm struggling with this obsessive thoughts all the time, and it was making me so anxious and incapable of living my daily life well. I really want to thank you for this, God bless you both. :)
I've struggled with OCD myself, When I came back into the Church it turned into pretty rough scrupulosity. I've used the exposure method, and it helped greatly helped me manage my OCD. It was difficult at first but go easier the more I did it. I've also heard advice for scruples that a person who suffers with scrupulosity should not trust their conscience but put their trust in their Confessor and obey his instruction.
As someone who recently learnt what scrupulosity is, the relief I felt after hearing it was such a breath of fresh air. For a while I thought I was the crazy one who had such thoughts and moments in life that gives me anxiety and depressive episodes. When I learnt that God could hear our every thought I became even more anxious and my self-awareness was at its peak, I noticed every thought more than before and took it way too seriously as well that I felt like I had to apologize to God for every intrusive thought I had as well that I felt so tired to be a servant of God which made me learnt to doomscroll because I decided to just distract my thoughts or like Dr. Matthew said I will become a slave to all sorts of solutions I hear online. "Try to not think of it." was oone of it My brain will become: "Okay, let's think of something else. Something else, something else, something else.... Oh gosh am I doing it right? Is this how it's done? What if-" And the horror rabbit hole continues. I am better now after taking some advice from Fr. Ripperger's talks on it. The advice I took from his video is: 1) Focus on God and He will take care of it. I would imagine myself standing next to God, God is this Holy ray of light during the Transfiguration on the mountain and I am next to Him with all these problems buzzing around me like flies. I would look at God and He would look at me, just like that, I believe His ray of light burnt these flies and suddenly I am thinking of how bright God is, how warm He felt, how lovable He is. The attention would shift away from me and onto God. You can imagine however you'd like, this is just what works for me when I imagine God or stare at a picture of Jesus if it helps you. 2) You are not THAT important. You are important but not THAT important. 3) He also shared that the devil wants you to think of "ANYTHING but God." As long you are far away from God, they are happy about it and I personally want to be near God (and you should too) because He is good so I will try my best to think of God, read His word, talk to Him and thank Him often. Practicing all these helped me a lot, although it's different for each individual. Just remember to never give up on God, He is good, and He loves you. He is so ready to forgive you and welcome you into His loving arms. God bless you guys' brothers and sisters!
Fr Ripperger has a great UA-cam video on scrupulosity which helps explain things and gives a few other solutions to this problem. It really helped me. Lots of scrupulosity isn’t necessarily sexual in nature either. Best advice given to me is that if you’re not sure of something is venial or mortal or if you fully consented to a thought / action etc GO to communion. As one priest had to say to me, if you wouldn’t swear an oath that you’re sure it was mortal, then go. Also it should be repeated here that Satan can put thoughts in your head too. I can’t emphasise enough: just because you thought something doesn’t mean you consented. That’s been what’s hard for me. If it enters my head (eg an uncharitable thought) it seems I’ve already thought it therefore I’ve already sinned. But rejecting that thought as soon as I’m aware (eg. That’s not charitable, that’s not fair or who do I think I am I did the same x y z last week!) actually means I am resisting and therefore growing in charity. But someone who has scrupulosity can’t really be the judge as we are super sensitive, that’s why Fr Ripperger’s advice was perfect for me. And one more thing I was reassured by, it’s never a sin to go to confession. Remember Jesus said it’s the sick that need the doctor!!
There's a booklet by Fr. William Doyle S.J. called "scruples and their treatment" that I found very practical advice for those struggling with scrupulosity
I really, really needed this. Man I didn't even realize how scrupulous I am. From constant fear, intrusive thoughts and even fear of those thoughts ironically backfiring in making me think of them. God bless Dr. Breuninger. Maybe I do need a therapist lol.
I suffer from OCD scrupulosity and have since I came to my faith. I realize I’ve always had minor symptoms to a degree before then. Thank you. I am so glad more people are talking about this. People treat scrupulosity as something other than part of a mental illness when it is one (persistent and irrational scruples). We need to take it seriously and to be taken seriously. People don’t realize how debilitating it is. I am diagnosed and knowing gives me the freedom to grow through obedience to my spiritual director and speaking with my counselor
My son has OCD and is seeing an Neurologist. This makes me realize that there are so many people dealing with this kind of thing. Actually we are all dealing with stuff. I think it would benefit him to see a therapist.
The consequence of sin is death. Jesus died instead of sinners. So there is no eternal death that waits for you. The death was defeated. God loves you.
I've met a fair share of scrupulous people. I feel thankful I don't suffer from it and take comfort in God's mercy on my typical sins and seek out private Confession when a matter weighs grave on my heart.
Scrupulosity has ruined my life going on almost 4 years. Part of my scrupulosity includes the fear of sinning by giving a bad confession. So not only do I feel like everything I do is sinful, but I'm also kept from the sacrament of confession feeling like I will give a bad/sinful confession and my OCD not allowing me to put myself into a possible occasion for sin because I don't feel I will say all my sins perfectly the way God wants. My mind is constantly in a tug of war battle between God's mercy and hatred for my sin. I wish there was a good Catholic therapist or spiritual director where I live and all the good Catholics didn't live in Steubenville.
Praying for you and I thought of you/prayed when this video came out a couple of days ago that you would see it. I’m glad Matt posted a little clip of this from the longer video. ❤️🙏🏻
My friend, I totally understand. I've avoided communion for well over a year because I never thought I got confession 'right' and it was just easier to go to mass, avoid serious sin, but stay away from communion just in case I wasn't forgiven. I have made many, many confessions, often every few days, and I've re-made my general confession into the Church (I'm a new Catholic) about 4 times. The last one took 45 minutes, 8 pages kf notes, and hours and hours to prepare for. Each time I leave the confessional, I feel great. Then a few days later I think uh oh.... I wasn't contrite, because I did the sin again. Or I think 'I spoke too much, the priest didn't understand me, the sin wasn't absolved. I even went back once, attempted to confess every bad thought I've ever had, struggled to express these thoughts accurately because they were so minor, and then realised later that in my 45 minute confession, I actually said something in desperation that I realised later wasn't strictly 100% true, and then had a complete meltdown because I felt like I'd lied in confession and messed up my re-do, of my re-do, of my re-do. I pulled out my pen and paper, and started writing them all down, yet again..... I actually left the Church for a few months after this, I gave up. But I realised I still needed God in my life, so I came back and found the most conservative, traditional priest I could find (because they have a reputation for being strict, and woumd honestly tell me if I made a valid confession or not) and I laid out all my questions - was this a sin? Did this invalidate my confession? Am I in a state of grace? Can I do a certain action without sin? Do I need to re-do my old confessions? Etc etc. He listened to every stupid thought I ever had, and then told me never to go back and do any old confessions again. He told me why he thinks my confessions were still valid (even when I doubted) and told me that the standard I set for a 'perfect' confession was far too high. I asked him what I do on the day of judgement if he was wrong, and he told me: 'Everything I've told you is from 2000 years of Church tradition in dealing with scrupulosity. I have suffered from this myself, and found peace only in total and complete abandonment to God, which has taught me real trust in him. Nothing we do is ever good enough, which is what the scrupulous person discovers. Scrupulosity can be a gift in realising that, because it forces us to look to God to cover the imperfections we will ALWAYS have'. He gave me permission to use '10 Commandments for the scrupulous' (google it) which I like, and told me that whenever an anxious thought comes to mind, treat it like a temptation (I.e. ignore it) and move on, and commanded me never to engage in a thought that says 'you're not forgiven'. It's a work in progress, but it helps. To assist, I pay particular attention at mass to say the prayer during the Eucharistic prayer, when we say, 'I am not worthy that you should enter under my roof, but only say the word, and my soul shall be healed'. It is a beautiful prayer. I also whisper the Jesus prayer, 'Lord Jesus Christ, son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner' as I bow to the host before reception. Scrupulosity has made me realise that I will never be enough. I can't work my way out of this. I can never make a perfect enough action to please God, which has forced me into accepting that the only way out is through his love for me - it's he that saves me, not me saving myself. This is my mindset now, after all my trials. I will never be good enough. But He can make me good enough, I'll never be anything without him.
you should look into “Catholic Counselors” they are expensive but it is so worth it. i’ve been counseled by them for about 2 months now and i’m doing so much better!! i will also keep you in my prayers!!
This is exactly what I go through every time I want to get closer to God and be a better catholic. Eventually I lose hope. Scrupulosity eventually makes me so miserable that I throw my hands up and give up because I feel I can't be perfect, which I know is Pride. I know it is. And I fear that if I'm not perfect God will punish me. That whatever I could possibly ask for, I'm not worthy of - maybe it is true - that God won't grant it to me and that leads to not asking at all. Leads to me doing things of my own efforts, because I feel like I can't trust God. Or I get paranoid that God will sabotage me if I try to do something, to punish me. Please pray for me.
Great episode. As a person that struggles with OCD, it’s always great to hear when someone truly understands. As stated one of the greatest struggles is determining what has meaning and what does not; what is God telling me versus what are my impulses and obsessions telling me.
Recently, I was feeling very lost and dealing with some crippling OCD stuff. I don't know a lot about scrupulosity (we don't talk about it much in my non-denominational church) but felt it might be related somehow, and resolved to learn more about it... Then I see that Pints posted this talk, at literally the perfect time 😊 Coincidences like this have been popping up more lately, as I learn about Catholicism. Not sure what it means but I'm very glad for the answers!
Well I have dealt with it, it was not easy, but I endured. Just keep your eyes on Christ and do your best, be honest with yourself and if you did your best, say that to yourself. Also count your blessings!
Bless you for addressing and publicizing this issue! If it had not been for a particular priest, I would not even have been able to identify that it's what I am suffering from -hence no treatment. What a cross it is even when you theoretically know you should relax about these intrusive thoughts and doubts, and how much worse for those not knowing at all they should not listen to every compulsion from their ill inner "conscientiousness-like" voice. I pray for my fellow scrupulee peers and please pray for me. On top of above advice, I strongly recommend a psychotropic treatment for OCD -personally I have been taking venlafaxine and prazepam, they truly help calm down the thoughts turmoil and the associated distress feelings, though they're not miraculous of course.
Wow. I cannot even describe how happy I am finding out that someone finally understands me. I cannot even describe the suffering I was going through due to my scrupulosity. I would go to confession every day or twice a day. The only thing that is helping me is obedience. Believing that it is Jesus in the person of my confessor and with all His sacred Heart He wants to free me. Jesus loves obedience, trust me.
Going to therapy helps, childhood trauma leads to changes in your central nervous system and that produces many changes many of your behaviors that are not necessarily free voluntary acts, you might be sinning yet it's not fully your fault, the lack of empathy by your caretakers or the many repeated actions of disapproval towards us as kids ends up leading us to perpetuate a form of baseline guilt for just doing anything.
I developed OCD in 2021. Sometimes I felt something bad will happen to me If i don't wash some dishes in the kitchen, if I go to sleep without taking a bath. The origin of this is that I'm obsessed with the sin of lazyness. In 2021 this pushed me to be busy and anxious all the week doing things, this push me to be perfectionist. Now in 2023 I have problems with anxiety, insomnia and social media adiction. I felt guilt and regret because I'm deal with unhealthy habits and scared of God judment to me. At this moment I got really well and I fight the battle of my mind with the Bible. Some books that help me are Job, Esther, the books of the prophets, The four Gospels and books written by Paul apostle.
Thank you for this. It makes so much sense to me. I'm uncertain all the time. Was that a sin?😮 One therapist I listened to said that Faith is moving forward through the uncertainty and trusting God through the uncertainty. It helps me to think of OCD as a monster that's trying to stop me getting closer to God. So I wrote OCD on a piece of paper and physically put it on a shelf. I know it's there and I accept its going to take time but I'm not going to let it take away something that means more to me than anything else in this world.
This is a good reminder. My scruples has been very bad lately, even though I'm on medication. (Zoloft) it keeps me from having panic attacks everyday, but of course intrusive thoughts don't disappear. Here's some stuff about my experience cux I need to let it out sometimes: I've had them since third grade I think, I remember doing the dishes and stuff and thinking "what if I stabbed myself right now" and it made me afraid to go near any knives. (Doesn't help that I was suicidal at this time also) Then by fifth grade it went from violent thoughts to gross sexual ones. Sexual thoughts about my family, friends, strangers, anybody. Years upon Years of torture. Then, when I became a Christian in 10th grade, my intrusive thoughts started involving God. "Did I commit the unforgivable sin" was a big one, or "am I elect" "am I deceiving myself" (calvinist household) was I never saved to begin with? And everytime I thought don't commit the unforgivable sin, my mind would utter some blasphemous thing to torture itself. It's exactly like how he described it, "don't think of this" what do you do? You think of it. And I don't know if others do this, but my intrusive thoughts have gotten si bad to the point I've looked possessed because I picked up a habit of twitching my head or rolling my eyes everytime I get one, which was very painful. Then I moved onto just thinking of a little phrase to figure back against it everytime I had it. That didn't work. Then I moved to beating my chest or my head with my fist, which resulted in fun bruises (not fun) and led me to wonder sometimes if I'm possessed. Thankfully, with my parents patience, and God's grace, and medication, I've been able to mostly function as a normal person. It's still the hardest thing ever to keep existing sometimes, and often I wished I could blow my head off to end the battle. I have no reason to post this here besides hearing from my other scruples pals. You aren't the only one, you aren't the most evil hearted dirty minded person on the planet. It's part of living in a fallen world. Our hearts and minds lean towards these things naturally. They are temptations. Ignore them. Don't fight, you'll always lose. Flee. Run to Jesus. Dismiss them. Satan loves to torture people. Resist him. I wish I'd never have an evil thought again, but that won't happen until I die. So for now, I must dismiss them, I must not think every evil thought is a sin. Fantasizing about evil and enjoying it is, but a thought that comes up is just a result of a fallen world and a sinful nature. It does not make me automatically condemned.
Hoo boy. Seeing my past self here. It gets better. It really does get better. It doesn't ever really go away, but it lessens CONSIDERABLY. I still get nasty intrusive thoughts, but less of them. I'm able to let them pass by without having to react to them now, and I'm much more at peace. You'll get there too. It takes time to retrain a brain, hang in there.
I've had OCD my entire life I suppose (wasn't diagnosed until my early 20s though), but when my first son was born it spiraled out if control. I think stressful life changescan aggravate it. I've learned to manage it much better now, it does get easier. I found the exposure therapy extremely useful especially during that time and it helped me alot
Yes Amen. Fill your head up with God's love and mercy keep studying God's truth. Trust in God's redemption. Some of this could be hearing that God is angry with us. God is not angry at us. Especially people dealing with mental issues because Jesus knows their struggles.
I am not trying to criticize Dr. Breuninger here, but apparently there is another approach to treating scrupulosity than what is described in the video. Here is a quote from the link I have attached below. “The problem is that many clinicians use something call Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy to treat OCD. This approach involves exposing the client to the thing they are obsessed about (a germy object, for instance) and then teaching them to relax and overcome the obsessional thoughts and feelings while in the presence of that object. It can be a very effective form of treatment for general OCD, but you can’t use it to treat scrupulosity because you can’t exactly tell a client to go and do something sinful and then teach them relaxation techniques…” Link here: catholiccounselors.com/got-guilt-peace-of-mind-for-scrupulous-souls/
Awesome video! Thanks a lot for doing it. I can really relate to many of the things Dr. Matt talks about. Along with advice, more in the line of psychology, that has helped me more to understand and deal with scrupulosity, I have found St. Ignatius's 6 notes on scrupulosity (found in his Spiritual Exercises) to be super helpful. From a spiritual perspective, understanding how scruples can truly be a means by which the enemy attacks us, confuses us, and discourages us was something that enabled me to grow in spiritual/interior freedom. God bless!
A very helpful book my Priest recommended to me is 'Scruples and Sainthood' by Trent Beattie. I also like 'Scruples and Their Treatment' by Fr. William Doyle.
Perhaps you could do a whole program on this whole subject!!! I’ve been told that I can’t be Catholicr than the Catholic Church. Scruples it’s a fine line between being mindful of a understanding of self and what we think we’ve done wrong or not.When in confession I’m always worried that I have forgotten something important I needed to confess. Examining conscience and hoping to expose everything to the Lord is always been important. I saw them feel like I do it right.
One of the best exposure therapies I've done for myself is listen to Car Alarm by Too Many Zooz. It brought on Absolute horror/panic, but I listened to the whole piece and I was better for it. This will help almost no one no doubt but it's a great tune.
There a alot of people who suffer in silence with this illness I have had ocd scuplosity since I was around 15 it's a real shocker oh well I just keep on going trying to stay close to God
The consequence of sin is death. Jesus died instead of sinners. So there is no eternal death that waits for you. The death was defeated. God loves you.
I live alone; I really struggle; I really wish I had someone to talk to every day about these struggles; ... someone who understood ... maybe, someone who has been through it, and has beat it/ has come out victorious; don't see how someone can really offer counsel unless they've actually been through it themselves. Please, pray for me. Do y'all beg God (over and over) for a miracle to be healed in mind, body, spirit and soul, and HOPE that "THIS" TIME, maybe, God will perform that miracle for you? And when it doesn't happen, how do you feel? How do you cope?
I’ve had similar feelings but it was about going out and evangelising, and other works. If I did not follow the compulsion I felt like I was not pushing myself like Jesus would have pushed himself, and was therefore was not being as good of a Christian as I could’ve been
5:50 pretty much says it The scrupulous person must be taught that every thought is not necessarily a reflection of them Learn how that it is ok to have those thoughts as long as they don’t act on them Sit with the thought for as long as it wants to stay .(if you try to force it out it will just increase anxiety and will teach your brain that you need to force the thought out instead of teaching the brain to ignore it)
Sometimes, it may simply be not knowing if something you have done or thought is a 'sin'. Some may be trying to be 'perfect' instead of human and in their attempt to be sinless, they micromanage their activities and thoughts which results in worry and anxiety.
I struggle a lot with this when it comes to prayer. I’ll pray and then I’m like oh wait that wasn’t enough and then I pray over and over and over again. It’s quite exhausting cause some days prayer doesn’t bring peace it brings anxiety. I hate it :(
As a renewed Catholic I never knew I'd develop scrupulosity after getting over spiritual pride. 😂 Several priests had to tell me in various ways in confession before one of them eventually said the word scrupulous. Dang, the things I learn and experience on the road to devoutness. Haha. I think it's just because we're overly zealous at some point that's why it happens. But surely we can get over this. And then I wonder what's next after getting over scrupulosity. 🤔
The problem with exposure therapy in this area is that it's essentially asking the person to defile their conscience. What they are exposing themselves to may well not actually be sinful, but because they persist in doubt it is to them. I don't know exactly how to stop it yet, but I know we must have faith that every sin is forgiven of those who believe in Christ, and God is a compassionate Father who gently and faithfully corrects His children and sanctifies them in the peace bought by Christ's blood. He is not ruthless like these thoughts
The consequence of sin is death. Jesus died instead of sinners. So there is no eternal death that waits for you. The death was defeated. God loves you.
How should someone with scrupulosity interpret the following verse? "Ye have heard that it was said, ‘Thou shalt not commit adultery’: but I say unto you, that every one that looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart." Matthew 5:27-28
It’s about consent. There’s a hierarchy here. The senses introduce an image / sensation / sound etc which evokes an emotion. This so far is not necessarily voluntary but part of the ‘invitation’ to sin. There might even be a feeling of pleasure associated with the thought etc. Still no sin here. The emotions are ‘sent up’ as it were to the rational mind, which contemplates what to do with it (all this is happening in a split second oftentimes) then the mind starts to think about it in terms of making a decision. The will decides. The will is where the consent or not comes in. Eg. Beautiful lady walks past. Emotions and feelings are stirred up. Not necessarily voluntary so no sin yet. There is a feeling of pleasure perhaps associated with the thoughts of what the body desires. Still no sin yet. Then the mind says ‘should I pursue this woman in action? Should I just think about her in a lustful way? Still no sin until the Will decides yes. Full consent if one fully and deliberately chooses ‘yes let’s go’. No consent if someone refuses the invitation so to speak and says ‘I am attracted to pursue this but no I won’t, and turns thoughts / actions away as immediately as they are aware of what’s going on. This latter one is what actually increases virtue. There is no virtue without temptation. That’s why God allows it because then we triumph, grow in virtue and Satan is humiliated.
Is this OCD? I have over 300 favorites. I will think of a topic and look it up and from there I will encounter a concept, topic, idea, or word I find interesting so then next I will be reading about that. I often have multiple tabs open. I call it "mental hoarding." It bothers me when I do not understand something thoroughly. I can get obsessive and fixated on certain topics. I do not know why I feel like I have to know everything. It's a lot of pressure. I used to enjoy creative writing but now I feel like I have to know every tiny detail about the character's personality quirks, the story's setting, etc. I do not have enough time in the world to read 300 favorites. It's like I save/favorite article in hopes that I will read it later. I always think I will need it later. I am moving out soon and I have seen how many cleaning supplies I have bought.
Not sure if OCD but I relate to you there with "mental hoarding" (good term you coined there). And then when I find out I am mental hoarding I try to find a way out by THEN trying to lean on Jesus and affirm myself that He is all I need. But really I need to persevere in that and not mental hoarder as you say. I would think of mental hoarding as more of an offshoot of greed potentially - greed for knowledge and self-accomplishment.
I don't know if hoarding is a form of OCD or not, but I think it is hoarding. I used to know someone who saved every issue of the newspaper to read later. Eventually there was nowhere to sit in the house and very little space to walk. This was back before the internet was a big thing. You are lucky if you can keep your hoarding habits virtual.
Well, I try to imagine the image of The Divine Mercy and say Jesus I trust in you when these thoughts pop up or the image of Jesus during a storm giving His hand.
Same. Or I recite a short prayer such as “Jesus Christ, Son of David, have mercy on me a sinner” or “Most precious blood of Jesus Christ, save us and the whole world”.
Hello Matt. This video came at the perfect time. I also get these random thoughts but also my biggest ones are of a sexual nature. They involve past sexual encounters with my ex girlfriends when i was out of my faith. Can someone be oppressed by our sinful actions from the past? It seems like the devil uses these thoughts to taunt us into believing we are bad. Any advice?
Yes actually, scrupulous people tend to worry about their past sins they already confessed and doubting if the sins are forgiven. And yes, if they're confessed properly, they are forgiven and we shouldn't hold on to that anymore because that would be an insult to God's wonderful mercy. Easier said than done, I know🤣So, if you haven't confessed these sins yet, you do have some reasons to worry. If you have, let go of it and trust in God. You're right, the devil wants to steal our peace by making us stuck in our past. Stay focused on the present, that would be my personal advice.
I had that same problem (or still do but not so much anymore). It took me 45 mins. to an hour to pray the rosary because I kept repeating a hail mary/Our Father when I wasn’t paying 90-100% attention to every word.
Ok, you guys are discussing what scrupulosity really is, but boy do people also wrongly accuse people of this. Especially when one is trying to call others to correction or action! It’s used as a cop out accusation so they can say you are just scrupulous and what you are saying isn’t true, therefore, the correction you are calling for doesn’t need to happen. Oh this happens a lot.
White polar bear?!? Didn't get that? Also, tongue in cheek, at first I saw the guest's own paper coffee cup and was wondering if he suffered from scruples / OCD with germs and didn't want to use the Pints with Aquinas mug? ha ha. I disagree with "don't go to Confession for 2 weeks." I like to go 1x a week. It was highly recommended by various Saints. More than once a week yeah that could be scruples. But once a week isn't. In fact, it's quite good. Plus, if someone has scrupulosity then probably 2 weeks would drive them crazy but once a week is more doable? Lastly, the "research is me-search" is an interesting saying I guess now with the algorithms. Regarding if the guy you mentioned, Dr. Jon Abramovich, is Christian, well, his website doesn't say, quite generic and kind of avoids the topic, as does his UA-cam channel, etc.; but, he does have an interesting article out on Protestantism and OCD. So, I recommend you invite this "King of OCD" onto your show and ask him! ;-) (At first I thought you were gonna say Ibrahimovich, as in Zlatan! ha ha)
Given what is supposedly at stake, scrupuulosity is the only logical response. In fact, it falls infinitely short of what one should do every waking moment of one’s life. Anything even beginning to approach the justified effort to avoid sin would put the person in an asylum and then the grave shortly thereafter. Hey, YOU did this, Catholicism. Good job, good effort.
@@loveandideas Luther suffered very much due to abuse he endured from his toxic parents, who beat him and abused him emotionally. Because of his toxic relationship with his parents, he grew to view God in the same way, he saw God as someone who is hard to please. He once said, and I quote "I hated God." He joined the strictest monastery he could find, and punished himself through his mental condition of scrupulosity, to try to please God just the way he always tried to please his father and failed. Everything Luther did was a result of his childhood trauma, a lifetime of wrestling his own internal demons, feeling like he could never please anyone let alone God. It's a very sad tormented life he lived. Had he joined a more joyful order such as the Franciscans, had he had parents who loved him, had he had a more balanced and safe childhood environment, all would have been very different for him. It's a very sad story indeed.
@@loveandideas that's the lie that protestants like to spread in their churches. Until one day their eyes are opened to not only the full love of God's grace in the Catholic church, but the fullness of it's truths spanning 2,000 years. I encourage you to take a deeper look, the way former Protestants like Trent Horn, Dr Scott Han, and Jimmy Akin did. It doesn't happen over night, or by engaging in endless debates on UA-cam, but by informing oneself, reading, listening, praying. Praying for you.
Dude. DUDE. FINALLY.
This. This this this. This is my head, this is how my brain works, this guy gets it.
Thank you for putting this out.
yes, this really helped, this is exactly how I felt, ike to a T
I really struggle with OCD and religious scrupulosity. I constantly get the obsessive thought that the only way I can truly make the Lord happy is by joining a convent even though I have no desire to be a nun. For a while I kept saying "God, make my will align with yours" expecting him to transform my heart to desire becoming a nun but it never happened. I have always had a strong desire to be a mother and feel a sense of peace when I picture myself with a big family some day. I went to friends and family and spiritual directors and I was becoming upset because I thought I was doing a bad job at listening to God. It was a mess. I was so unhappy and walking on eggshells with everything I did. I have developed the practice of saying "God, I offer this up to you. Every moment. All the time." It helps me to release myself from the burden of my own anxieties. I constantly pray for peace. He always provides. I try to ask him to help me live in the moment so that I can just serve him as best as I can in the present. Another note I have gotten about questioning the future is "Maybe I will- maybe I won't." because the reality is that worrying about the future separates us from the gift of the present.
Man I needed to hear (or read) this, thanks and may God bless you
Great insight. This is very helpful and I hope you get better with your OCD and scrupulosity. I hope you become a mother one day. God bless you and your family. ❤️💕🙏🏽
I’ve been in the same situation before! You aren’t alone! Praying for you!! ❤️
I also had this experience so intensely when I was in my teens!! Praise the Lord I am now married for 16 years with six kids. God is good. ❤️
It’s truly a struggle. OCD and scrupulosity can ruin one’s viewpoint of the Faith and God. It’s vitally important to seek help for it whenever possible
@@LazyStarrfish thank you for encouraging me to seek help 🙏
6 years ago (junior year/senior year of HS) I had a spell of sexual intrusive thoughts about my mother who i saw everyday and i started to panic every time i saw her, i broke down crying and told my dad i was going crazy without going into detail. Felt so lonely.
Thank God i found a secular psychologist UA-cam bloke talk about intrusive thoughts, it changed everything.
This video is a Catholic version, much appreciated🙏🏼💙💙💙
Just you commenting about this is going to help a lot of people. Thank you for your witness.
You’re the man for being vulnerable and sharing. So many suffer from similar things. God is good. You are Normal.
Yep. All truth is God's truth, so it doesn't matter who says it.
whats the mame of the youtube ?
Wow I experienced this before
I'm currently seeking advice from a wonderful priest on dealing with scrupulosity. For anybody who doesn't understand this, please be aware of how truly, utterly, awfully and completely debilitating this disease is, and please pray for us.
Stealing God's peace from our hearts is one of the demonic's most powerful weapons, and this is what the scrupulous person faces every day.
The consequence of sin is death. Jesus died instead of sinners. So there is no eternal death that waits for you. The death was defeated. God loves you.
I'm here for you, brother. I promise there is an army of people praying for you.
It’s SOOOO bad🥺☹️ I have it and I HATE it.
@@loveandideasthe Scrupulous person (like me) knows this but our brains just aren’t matching that. That’s why we have to just let those thoughts pass by.
my jaw dropped listening to these two people just talk so accurately and casually about something that i thought i had been struggling with alone. i’ve seen so many videos on scrupulosity, but this one was the first one that truly made me feel like my thought process was understood. also, to see people in the comments sharing their battles and hopes with scrupulosity reminds me that not only do we have more in common than we think, but that we should also be talking about this topic more, reaching out to one another, and praying for each other. thank you guys for starting this conversation and reminding me that God loves us no matter our struggles. God bless you all :)
St Therese of Lisieux, St Alphonsus Ligueri, etc. had Scrupulosity, but by the Grace of God , they overcame . Through The Lord , we have endless possibilities
As a scrupulous person, it made me feel good to hear them laugh about it! In turn it helped me laugh at myself and realize how small my scrupulosity is on the grand scale of things.
On May 16th of this year, my fiance and I had a very direct experience of St Ubald. He is a little known saint and the patron of those with OCD, Autism and against demonic possession. Because of our experience I am seeking to spread devotion to him. Ora Pro Nobis
One of the things that has helped with my OCD is finding out through books and therapy that when I’m distressed about a thought, particularly violent intrusive thoughts, it’s because I will not act on those thoughts. The fact that they are distressing to me means that I’m a good person and will not act on that thought and I can just let it pass. That’s been super helpful for me to know
This video has been added to my favorites! I really needed this. I have trouble with scrupulosity. And now I have the comfort of knowing I'm not the only one who fears I've done my penance wrong after confession.
This was a really good video. I definitely deal with scrupulosity and have had some success managing it. For anyone who deals with this, here is what has helped me the most:
1. Your thoughts are like boats floating down a river. You notice each one, but you always have the choice to get on the boat or just let it keep going. You can’t stop what pops into your head, seriously, that’s not the answer. Just let them to continue floating down the river. Your duty is NOT to reject every bad one lol
2. Stress. You have too much stress. When a thought pops into your mind you get anxious about it, so anxious about it that you feel horrible when they come. THAT is what you should try and stop. So if you want to serve God truly, let go of your anxiety and go for a walk. Or just lay in bed and do nothing for 30 minutes to relax. The thoughts hurt when you are stressed, that’s what you need to manage
3. Who is our God?... certainly not a Father who counts the number of times we say sorry compulsively. Our anxiety alot of times comes from not understanding who God is. He is not a hard cruel God who we must follow all of his commands like slaves.
We end up pinning OUR ANXIOUS SCRUPULOUSITY on God and see God as the things that we are. He doesn’t see you like that. So ask him for healing to see His heart for who he truly is.
Also, watch therapist videos on UA-cam. There is one called, “the catholic therapist” and another i like is Katie d’ath i think.
The thing i have to stress(ironic word choice) the most with this, is that you don’t have to feel stress about these things to love God. He’s not that kind of Dad
Thank you for this.
“Not every thought you have has to be latched onto or have meaning.”
Letting the thoughts pass is SO important. I am currently doing this In my Scrupulosity/OCD healing journey.
From Brazil here. Man, this video was like a light in the dark for me. I'm struggling with this obsessive thoughts all the time, and it was making me so anxious and incapable of living my daily life well. I really want to thank you for this, God bless you both. :)
I've struggled with OCD myself, When I came back into the Church it turned into pretty rough scrupulosity. I've used the exposure method, and it helped greatly helped me manage my OCD. It was difficult at first but go easier the more I did it.
I've also heard advice for scruples that a person who suffers with scrupulosity should not trust their conscience but put their trust in their Confessor and obey his instruction.
I think that was St. Ignatius of Loyola's way of overcoming scrupulosity!
As someone who recently learnt what scrupulosity is, the relief I felt after hearing it was such a breath of fresh air. For a while I thought I was the crazy one who had such thoughts and moments in life that gives me anxiety and depressive episodes. When I learnt that God could hear our every thought I became even more anxious and my self-awareness was at its peak, I noticed every thought more than before and took it way too seriously as well that I felt like I had to apologize to God for every intrusive thought I had as well that I felt so tired to be a servant of God which made me learnt to doomscroll because I decided to just distract my thoughts or like Dr. Matthew said I will become a slave to all sorts of solutions I hear online. "Try to not think of it." was oone of it My brain will become: "Okay, let's think of something else. Something else, something else, something else.... Oh gosh am I doing it right? Is this how it's done? What if-" And the horror rabbit hole continues. I am better now after taking some advice from Fr. Ripperger's talks on it.
The advice I took from his video is:
1) Focus on God and He will take care of it. I would imagine myself standing next to God, God is this Holy ray of light during the Transfiguration on the mountain and I am next to Him with all these problems buzzing around me like flies. I would look at God and He would look at me, just like that, I believe His ray of light burnt these flies and suddenly I am thinking of how bright God is, how warm He felt, how lovable He is. The attention would shift away from me and onto God. You can imagine however you'd like, this is just what works for me when I imagine God or stare at a picture of Jesus if it helps you.
2) You are not THAT important. You are important but not THAT important.
3) He also shared that the devil wants you to think of "ANYTHING but God." As long you are far away from God, they are happy about it and I personally want to be near God (and you should too) because He is good so I will try my best to think of God, read His word, talk to Him and thank Him often.
Practicing all these helped me a lot, although it's different for each individual. Just remember to never give up on God, He is good, and He loves you. He is so ready to forgive you and welcome you into His loving arms. God bless you guys' brothers and sisters!
Honestly, you two should do a whole course on this issue. Truly grateful for this video 😊
Fr Ripperger has a great UA-cam video on scrupulosity which helps explain things and gives a few other solutions to this problem. It really helped me. Lots of scrupulosity isn’t necessarily sexual in nature either. Best advice given to me is that if you’re not sure of something is venial or mortal or if you fully consented to a thought / action etc GO to communion. As one priest had to say to me, if you wouldn’t swear an oath that you’re sure it was mortal, then go.
Also it should be repeated here that Satan can put thoughts in your head too. I can’t emphasise enough: just because you thought something doesn’t mean you consented. That’s been what’s hard for me. If it enters my head (eg an uncharitable thought) it seems I’ve already thought it therefore I’ve already sinned. But rejecting that thought as soon as I’m aware (eg. That’s not charitable, that’s not fair or who do I think I am
I did the same x y z last week!) actually means I am resisting and therefore growing in charity.
But someone who has scrupulosity can’t really be the judge as we are super sensitive, that’s why Fr Ripperger’s advice was perfect for me. And one more thing I was reassured by, it’s never a sin to go to confession. Remember Jesus said it’s the sick that need the doctor!!
Great advice
There's a booklet by Fr. William Doyle S.J. called "scruples and their treatment" that I found very practical advice for those struggling with scrupulosity
It's very good. I already read it.
I think Fr. Ripperger has already addressed this question better than anyone else
I really, really needed this. Man I didn't even realize how scrupulous I am. From constant fear, intrusive thoughts and even fear of those thoughts ironically backfiring in making me think of them. God bless Dr. Breuninger. Maybe I do need a therapist lol.
I suffer from OCD scrupulosity and have since I came to my faith. I realize I’ve always had minor symptoms to a degree before then. Thank you. I am so glad more people are talking about this. People treat scrupulosity as something other than part of a mental illness when it is one (persistent and irrational scruples). We need to take it seriously and to be taken seriously. People don’t realize how debilitating it is. I am diagnosed and knowing gives me the freedom to grow through obedience to my spiritual director and speaking with my counselor
thank you for this. I have OCD and this happens a lot to me
My son has OCD and is seeing an Neurologist. This makes me realize that there are so many people dealing with this kind of thing. Actually we are all dealing with stuff. I think it would benefit him to see a therapist.
The consequence of sin is death. Jesus died instead of sinners. So there is no eternal death that waits for you. The death was defeated. God loves you.
I've met a fair share of scrupulous people. I feel thankful I don't suffer from it and take comfort in God's mercy on my typical sins and seek out private Confession when a matter weighs grave on my heart.
Pints With Aquinas , thank you. You saved my life.
Scrupulosity has ruined my life going on almost 4 years. Part of my scrupulosity includes the fear of sinning by giving a bad confession. So not only do I feel like everything I do is sinful, but I'm also kept from the sacrament of confession feeling like I will give a bad/sinful confession and my OCD not allowing me to put myself into a possible occasion for sin because I don't feel I will say all my sins perfectly the way God wants. My mind is constantly in a tug of war battle between God's mercy and hatred for my sin. I wish there was a good Catholic therapist or spiritual director where I live and all the good Catholics didn't live in Steubenville.
Praying for you and I thought of you/prayed when this video came out a couple of days ago that you would see it. I’m glad Matt posted a little clip of this from the longer video. ❤️🙏🏻
My friend, I totally understand. I've avoided communion for well over a year because I never thought I got confession 'right' and it was just easier to go to mass, avoid serious sin, but stay away from communion just in case I wasn't forgiven.
I have made many, many confessions, often every few days, and I've re-made my general confession into the Church (I'm a new Catholic) about 4 times. The last one took 45 minutes, 8 pages kf notes, and hours and hours to prepare for. Each time I leave the confessional, I feel great. Then a few days later I think uh oh.... I wasn't contrite, because I did the sin again. Or I think 'I spoke too much, the priest didn't understand me, the sin wasn't absolved.
I even went back once, attempted to confess every bad thought I've ever had, struggled to express these thoughts accurately because they were so minor, and then realised later that in my 45 minute confession, I actually said something in desperation that I realised later wasn't strictly 100% true, and then had a complete meltdown because I felt like I'd lied in confession and messed up my re-do, of my re-do, of my re-do. I pulled out my pen and paper, and started writing them all down, yet again.....
I actually left the Church for a few months after this, I gave up. But I realised I still needed God in my life, so I came back and found the most conservative, traditional priest I could find (because they have a reputation for being strict, and woumd honestly tell me if I made a valid confession or not) and I laid out all my questions - was this a sin? Did this invalidate my confession? Am I in a state of grace? Can I do a certain action without sin? Do I need to re-do my old confessions? Etc etc.
He listened to every stupid thought I ever had, and then told me never to go back and do any old confessions again. He told me why he thinks my confessions were still valid (even when I doubted) and told me that the standard I set for a 'perfect' confession was far too high. I asked him what I do on the day of judgement if he was wrong, and he told me: 'Everything I've told you is from 2000 years of Church tradition in dealing with scrupulosity. I have suffered from this myself, and found peace only in total and complete abandonment to God, which has taught me real trust in him. Nothing we do is ever good enough, which is what the scrupulous person discovers. Scrupulosity can be a gift in realising that, because it forces us to look to God to cover the imperfections we will ALWAYS have'.
He gave me permission to use '10 Commandments for the scrupulous' (google it) which I like, and told me that whenever an anxious thought comes to mind, treat it like a temptation (I.e. ignore it) and move on, and commanded me never to engage in a thought that says 'you're not forgiven'.
It's a work in progress, but it helps.
To assist, I pay particular attention at mass to say the prayer during the Eucharistic prayer, when we say, 'I am not worthy that you should enter under my roof, but only say the word, and my soul shall be healed'. It is a beautiful prayer.
I also whisper the Jesus prayer, 'Lord Jesus Christ, son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner' as I bow to the host before reception.
Scrupulosity has made me realise that I will never be enough. I can't work my way out of this. I can never make a perfect enough action to please God, which has forced me into accepting that the only way out is through his love for me - it's he that saves me, not me saving myself.
This is my mindset now, after all my trials. I will never be good enough. But He can make me good enough, I'll never be anything without him.
You are probably not being as specific as your conscience is telling you to be
@@Hawka23 Thank you for posting this comment.
you should look into “Catholic Counselors” they are expensive but it is so worth it. i’ve been counseled by them for about 2 months now and i’m doing so much better!! i will also keep you in my prayers!!
So excellent!!! Thank you for this! Scrupulousness ruined my life!!! Thank you! Please have more of this Doctor!
This is exactly what I go through every time I want to get closer to God and be a better catholic. Eventually I lose hope. Scrupulosity eventually makes me so miserable that I throw my hands up and give up because I feel I can't be perfect, which I know is Pride. I know it is. And I fear that if I'm not perfect God will punish me. That whatever I could possibly ask for, I'm not worthy of - maybe it is true - that God won't grant it to me and that leads to not asking at all. Leads to me doing things of my own efforts, because I feel like I can't trust God. Or I get paranoid that God will sabotage me if I try to do something, to punish me.
Please pray for me.
Great episode. As a person that struggles with OCD, it’s always great to hear when someone truly understands. As stated one of the greatest struggles is determining what has meaning and what does not; what is God telling me versus what are my impulses and obsessions telling me.
Oh my gosh, this is so relevant for me. Luvox made all the difference -- night and day!
Recently, I was feeling very lost and dealing with some crippling OCD stuff. I don't know a lot about scrupulosity (we don't talk about it much in my non-denominational church) but felt it might be related somehow, and resolved to learn more about it...
Then I see that Pints posted this talk, at literally the perfect time 😊
Coincidences like this have been popping up more lately, as I learn about Catholicism. Not sure what it means but I'm very glad for the answers!
I'd encourage you to continue learning about the Catholic Faith. God loves you. And you can also get professional help with OCD
@@amask99 Thank you! Things are much better these days... Appreciate your comment and still learning :)
Oh my goodness, thank you so much!! I felt so lonley in Scrupulocity, and confused, this really helped
Well I have dealt with it, it was not easy, but I endured. Just keep your eyes on Christ and do your best, be honest with yourself and if you did your best, say that to yourself. Also count your blessings!
Bless you for addressing and publicizing this issue! If it had not been for a particular priest, I would not even have been able to identify that it's what I am suffering from -hence no treatment. What a cross it is even when you theoretically know you should relax about these intrusive thoughts and doubts, and how much worse for those not knowing at all they should not listen to every compulsion from their ill inner "conscientiousness-like" voice. I pray for my fellow scrupulee peers and please pray for me.
On top of above advice, I strongly recommend a psychotropic treatment for OCD -personally I have been taking venlafaxine and prazepam, they truly help calm down the thoughts turmoil and the associated distress feelings, though they're not miraculous of course.
Wow. I cannot even describe how happy I am finding out that someone finally understands me. I cannot even describe the suffering I was going through due to my scrupulosity. I would go to confession every day or twice a day. The only thing that is helping me is obedience. Believing that it is Jesus in the person of my confessor and with all His sacred Heart He wants to free me. Jesus loves obedience, trust me.
Wow! This video is an excellent discussion on a problem that plagues so many young, anxious people in the 21 century!!
Going to therapy helps, childhood trauma leads to changes in your central nervous system and that produces many changes many of your behaviors that are not necessarily free voluntary acts, you might be sinning yet it's not fully your fault, the lack of empathy by your caretakers or the many repeated actions of disapproval towards us as kids ends up leading us to perpetuate a form of baseline guilt for just doing anything.
More on this subject please. Thank you
I developed OCD in 2021. Sometimes I felt something bad will happen to me If i don't wash some dishes in the kitchen, if I go to sleep without taking a bath. The origin of this is that I'm obsessed with the sin of lazyness. In 2021 this pushed me to be busy and anxious all the week doing things, this push me to be perfectionist. Now in 2023 I have problems with anxiety, insomnia and social media adiction. I felt guilt and regret because I'm deal with unhealthy habits and scared of God judment to me. At this moment I got really well and I fight the battle of my mind with the Bible. Some books that help me are Job, Esther, the books of the prophets, The four Gospels and books written by Paul apostle.
Thank you for this. It makes so much sense to me. I'm uncertain all the time. Was that a sin?😮 One therapist I listened to said that Faith is moving forward through the uncertainty and trusting God through the uncertainty. It helps me to think of OCD as a monster that's trying to stop me getting closer to God. So I wrote OCD on a piece of paper and physically put it on a shelf. I know it's there and I accept its going to take time but I'm not going to let it take away something that means more to me than anything else in this world.
This was super helpful. Even if you don't have OCD.
Wow … this really helps ! “Thought” i was alone
This is a good reminder. My scruples has been very bad lately, even though I'm on medication. (Zoloft) it keeps me from having panic attacks everyday, but of course intrusive thoughts don't disappear.
Here's some stuff about my experience cux I need to let it out sometimes:
I've had them since third grade I think, I remember doing the dishes and stuff and thinking "what if I stabbed myself right now" and it made me afraid to go near any knives. (Doesn't help that I was suicidal at this time also)
Then by fifth grade it went from violent thoughts to gross sexual ones. Sexual thoughts about my family, friends, strangers, anybody. Years upon Years of torture. Then, when I became a Christian in 10th grade, my intrusive thoughts started involving God. "Did I commit the unforgivable sin" was a big one, or "am I elect" "am I deceiving myself" (calvinist household) was I never saved to begin with? And everytime I thought don't commit the unforgivable sin, my mind would utter some blasphemous thing to torture itself. It's exactly like how he described it, "don't think of this" what do you do? You think of it. And I don't know if others do this, but my intrusive thoughts have gotten si bad to the point I've looked possessed because I picked up a habit of twitching my head or rolling my eyes everytime I get one, which was very painful. Then I moved onto just thinking of a little phrase to figure back against it everytime I had it. That didn't work. Then I moved to beating my chest or my head with my fist, which resulted in fun bruises (not fun) and led me to wonder sometimes if I'm possessed.
Thankfully, with my parents patience, and God's grace, and medication, I've been able to mostly function as a normal person. It's still the hardest thing ever to keep existing sometimes, and often I wished I could blow my head off to end the battle. I have no reason to post this here besides hearing from my other scruples pals. You aren't the only one, you aren't the most evil hearted dirty minded person on the planet.
It's part of living in a fallen world. Our hearts and minds lean towards these things naturally. They are temptations. Ignore them. Don't fight, you'll always lose. Flee. Run to Jesus. Dismiss them. Satan loves to torture people. Resist him. I wish I'd never have an evil thought again, but that won't happen until I die. So for now, I must dismiss them, I must not think every evil thought is a sin. Fantasizing about evil and enjoying it is, but a thought that comes up is just a result of a fallen world and a sinful nature. It does not make me automatically condemned.
Thanks. God bless you.
Hoo boy. Seeing my past self here.
It gets better. It really does get better. It doesn't ever really go away, but it lessens CONSIDERABLY. I still get nasty intrusive thoughts, but less of them. I'm able to let them pass by without having to react to them now, and I'm much more at peace.
You'll get there too. It takes time to retrain a brain, hang in there.
Wow I do the twitching and rolling thing too !!! Glad I’m not the only one
Wow the knives thing I totally had, though I was afraid "how do I know I wouldn't stab someone?" While walking in the dining hall.
I've had OCD my entire life I suppose (wasn't diagnosed until my early 20s though), but when my first son was born it spiraled out if control. I think stressful life changescan aggravate it. I've learned to manage it much better now, it does get easier. I found the exposure therapy extremely useful especially during that time and it helped me alot
One of the cures for scrupulosity is to concentrate on what we had last Sunday, Divine Mercy: understanding just how merciful God is
Yes Amen. Fill your head up with God's love and mercy keep studying God's truth. Trust in God's redemption. Some of this could be hearing that God is angry with us. God is not angry at us. Especially people dealing with mental issues because Jesus knows their struggles.
I am not trying to criticize Dr. Breuninger here, but apparently there is another approach to treating scrupulosity than what is described in the video. Here is a quote from the link I have attached below.
“The problem is that many clinicians use something call Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy to treat OCD. This approach involves exposing the client to the thing they are obsessed about (a germy object, for instance) and then teaching them to relax and overcome the obsessional thoughts and feelings while in the presence of that object. It can be a very effective form of treatment for general OCD, but you can’t use it to treat scrupulosity because you can’t exactly tell a client to go and do something sinful and then teach them relaxation techniques…”
Link here: catholiccounselors.com/got-guilt-peace-of-mind-for-scrupulous-souls/
Awesome video! Thanks a lot for doing it. I can really relate to many of the things Dr. Matt talks about. Along with advice, more in the line of psychology, that has helped me more to understand and deal with scrupulosity, I have found St. Ignatius's 6 notes on scrupulosity (found in his Spiritual Exercises) to be super helpful. From a spiritual perspective, understanding how scruples can truly be a means by which the enemy attacks us, confuses us, and discourages us was something that enabled me to grow in spiritual/interior freedom.
God bless!
Thanks for this! Struggling with this since 2019. Awesome video!
We need more of these videos!!
A very helpful book my Priest recommended to me is 'Scruples and Sainthood' by Trent Beattie. I also like 'Scruples and Their Treatment' by Fr. William Doyle.
I don’t understand how it’s possible to be religious and not have this disorder.
I’m really sorry for anyone going through this. It’s really awful.
I really needed this
Wow much appreciated 👍
Perhaps you could do a whole program on this whole subject!!! I’ve been told that I can’t be Catholicr than the Catholic Church. Scruples it’s a fine line between being mindful of a understanding of self and what we think we’ve done wrong or not.When in confession I’m always worried that I have forgotten something important I needed to confess. Examining conscience and hoping to expose everything to the Lord is always been important. I saw them feel like I do it right.
Thank you. This was very helpful
That was really helpful.
One of the best exposure therapies I've done for myself is listen to Car Alarm by Too Many Zooz. It brought on Absolute horror/panic, but I listened to the whole piece and I was better for it.
This will help almost no one no doubt but it's a great tune.
There a alot of people who suffer in silence with this illness I have had ocd scuplosity since I was around 15 it's a real shocker oh well I just keep on going trying to stay close to God
Recently I came back to confession after 2 hours. It is a real struggle to deal with it. I do have OCD as well.
The consequence of sin is death. Jesus died instead of sinners. So there is no eternal death that waits for you. The death was defeated. God loves you.
I live alone; I really struggle; I really wish I had someone to talk to every day about these struggles; ... someone who understood ... maybe, someone who has been through it, and has beat it/ has come out victorious; don't see how someone can really offer counsel unless they've actually been through it themselves. Please, pray for me. Do y'all beg God (over and over) for a miracle to be healed in mind, body, spirit and soul, and HOPE that "THIS" TIME, maybe, God will perform that miracle for you? And when it doesn't happen, how do you feel? How do you cope?
I couldn’t do it without my therapist. I hope you get the help you need
I’ve had similar feelings but it was about going out and evangelising, and other works. If I did not follow the compulsion I felt like I was not pushing myself like Jesus would have pushed himself, and was therefore was not being as good of a Christian as I could’ve been
5:50 pretty much says it
The scrupulous person must be taught that every thought is not necessarily a reflection of them
Learn how that it is ok to have those thoughts as long as they don’t act on them
Sit with the thought for as long as it wants to stay .(if you try to force it out it will just increase anxiety and will teach your brain that you need to force the thought out instead of teaching the brain to ignore it)
Straight facts
Sometimes, it may simply be not knowing if something you have done or thought is a 'sin'. Some may be trying to be 'perfect' instead of human and in their attempt to be sinless, they micromanage their activities and thoughts which results in worry and anxiety.
I struggle a lot with this when it comes to prayer. I’ll pray and then I’m like oh wait that wasn’t enough and then I pray over and over and over again. It’s quite exhausting cause some days prayer doesn’t bring peace it brings anxiety. I hate it :(
THANK YOU!!!
The answer is in the book called Pilgrims Progress writen in 1660 by John Bunyan it is not ocd and its not mental illness.
As a renewed Catholic I never knew I'd develop scrupulosity after getting over spiritual pride. 😂 Several priests had to tell me in various ways in confession before one of them eventually said the word scrupulous. Dang, the things I learn and experience on the road to devoutness. Haha.
I think it's just because we're overly zealous at some point that's why it happens. But surely we can get over this. And then I wonder what's next after getting over scrupulosity. 🤔
The parishioners in line behind me would not appreciate me saying an entire rosary in the confessional 😄
I don't know that a good confessor should give a scrupulous person an entire rosary as penance anyway.
I FEEL SEEN
The problem with exposure therapy in this area is that it's essentially asking the person to defile their conscience. What they are exposing themselves to may well not actually be sinful, but because they persist in doubt it is to them. I don't know exactly how to stop it yet, but I know we must have faith that every sin is forgiven of those who believe in Christ, and God is a compassionate Father who gently and faithfully corrects His children and sanctifies them in the peace bought by Christ's blood. He is not ruthless like these thoughts
This is what ive been dealing with?! It has a name?!
The consequence of sin is death. Jesus died instead of sinners. So there is no eternal death that waits for you. The death was defeated. God loves you.
Get Mark DeJesus on the show
He' pretty helpful when it comes to the OCD healing journey
How should someone with scrupulosity interpret the following verse?
"Ye have heard that it was said, ‘Thou shalt not commit adultery’: but I say unto you, that every one that looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart."
Matthew 5:27-28
It’s about consent. There’s a hierarchy here. The senses introduce an image / sensation / sound etc which evokes an emotion. This so far is not necessarily voluntary but part of the ‘invitation’ to sin. There might even be a feeling of pleasure associated with the thought etc. Still no sin here. The emotions are ‘sent up’ as it were to the rational mind, which contemplates what to do with it (all this is happening in a split second oftentimes) then the mind starts to think about it in terms of making a decision. The will decides. The will is where the consent or not comes in.
Eg. Beautiful lady walks past. Emotions and feelings are stirred up. Not necessarily voluntary so no sin yet. There is a feeling of pleasure perhaps associated with the thoughts of what the body desires. Still no sin yet. Then the mind says ‘should I pursue this woman in action? Should I just think about her in a lustful way?
Still no sin until the Will decides yes.
Full consent if one fully and deliberately chooses ‘yes let’s go’.
No consent if someone refuses the invitation so to speak and says ‘I am attracted to pursue this but no I won’t, and turns thoughts / actions away as immediately as they are aware of what’s going on.
This latter one is what actually increases virtue. There is no virtue without temptation. That’s why God allows it because then we triumph, grow in virtue and Satan is humiliated.
Is this OCD? I have over 300 favorites. I will think of a topic and look it up and from there I will encounter a concept, topic, idea, or word I find interesting so then next I will be reading about that. I often have multiple tabs open. I call it "mental hoarding." It bothers me when I do not understand something thoroughly. I can get obsessive and fixated on certain topics. I do not know why I feel like I have to know everything. It's a lot of pressure. I used to enjoy creative writing but now I feel like I have to know every tiny detail about the character's personality quirks, the story's setting, etc.
I do not have enough time in the world to read 300 favorites. It's like I save/favorite article in hopes that I will read it later. I always think I will need it later. I am moving out soon and I have seen how many cleaning supplies I have bought.
Not sure if OCD but I relate to you there with "mental hoarding" (good term you coined there). And then when I find out I am mental hoarding I try to find a way out by THEN trying to lean on Jesus and affirm myself that He is all I need. But really I need to persevere in that and not mental hoarder as you say.
I would think of mental hoarding as more of an offshoot of greed potentially - greed for knowledge and self-accomplishment.
@@turkey3gwiddle I think it is a greed for knowledge and self accomplishment for me. It is like I want to know everything. I guess that is pride.
I don't know if hoarding is a form of OCD or not, but I think it is hoarding. I used to know someone who saved every issue of the newspaper to read later. Eventually there was nowhere to sit in the house and very little space to walk. This was back before the internet was a big thing. You are lucky if you can keep your hoarding habits virtual.
@@nightyew2160 I wonder how unhealthy it is in the long run
Well, I try to imagine the image of The Divine Mercy and say Jesus I trust in you when these thoughts pop up or the image of Jesus during a storm giving His hand.
Same. Or I recite a short prayer such as “Jesus Christ, Son of David, have mercy on me a sinner” or “Most precious blood of Jesus Christ, save us and the whole world”.
10:33 LMAO!!!
Hello Matt. This video came at the perfect time. I also get these random thoughts but also my biggest ones are of a sexual nature. They involve past sexual encounters with my ex girlfriends when i was out of my faith. Can someone be oppressed by our sinful actions from the past? It seems like the devil uses these thoughts to taunt us into believing we are bad. Any advice?
Yes actually, scrupulous people tend to worry about their past sins they already confessed and doubting if the sins are forgiven. And yes, if they're confessed properly, they are forgiven and we shouldn't hold on to that anymore because that would be an insult to God's wonderful mercy. Easier said than done, I know🤣So, if you haven't confessed these sins yet, you do have some reasons to worry. If you have, let go of it and trust in God. You're right, the devil wants to steal our peace by making us stuck in our past. Stay focused on the present, that would be my personal advice.
@@emamartinic4821 That’s superb advice. Thank you. Nice to hear that. I have confessed so your right. I have to trust in God's mercy. God bless you.
@@stpatrick614 I'm glad I could help😊
If I repeat the first hail mary of the rosary 3 to 4 times because I did not get it right (am I being scrupulous)?
Yes!
I had that same problem (or still do but not so much anymore). It took me 45 mins. to an hour to pray the rosary because I kept repeating a hail mary/Our Father when I wasn’t paying 90-100% attention to every word.
Ok, you guys are discussing what scrupulosity really is, but boy do people also wrongly accuse people of this. Especially when one is trying to call others to correction or action!
It’s used as a cop out accusation so they can say you are just scrupulous and what you are saying isn’t true, therefore, the correction you are calling for doesn’t need to happen.
Oh this happens a lot.
I agree. I think knowing that scrupulosity is a form of OCD really helps with the distinction.
White polar bear?!? Didn't get that? Also, tongue in cheek, at first I saw the guest's own paper coffee cup and was wondering if he suffered from scruples / OCD with germs and didn't want to use the Pints with Aquinas mug? ha ha. I disagree with "don't go to Confession for 2 weeks." I like to go 1x a week. It was highly recommended by various Saints. More than once a week yeah that could be scruples. But once a week isn't. In fact, it's quite good. Plus, if someone has scrupulosity then probably 2 weeks would drive them crazy but once a week is more doable? Lastly, the "research is me-search" is an interesting saying I guess now with the algorithms. Regarding if the guy you mentioned, Dr. Jon Abramovich, is Christian, well, his website doesn't say, quite generic and kind of avoids the topic, as does his UA-cam channel, etc.; but, he does have an interesting article out on Protestantism and OCD. So, I recommend you invite this "King of OCD" onto your show and ask him! ;-) (At first I thought you were gonna say Ibrahimovich, as in Zlatan! ha ha)
Given what is supposedly at stake, scrupuulosity is the only logical response. In fact, it falls infinitely short of what one should do every waking moment of one’s life. Anything even beginning to approach the justified effort to avoid sin would put the person in an asylum and then the grave shortly thereafter.
Hey, YOU did this, Catholicism. Good job, good effort.
When he said “the big guy” I immediately thought of Joe Biden
Is this what Martin Luther suffered from?
Yes.
Yes. And it looks that he overcame it in the best way, by accepting what Jesus did for him.
@@loveandideas Luther suffered very much due to abuse he endured from his toxic parents, who beat him and abused him emotionally. Because of his toxic relationship with his parents, he grew to view God in the same way, he saw God as someone who is hard to please. He once said, and I quote "I hated God." He joined the strictest monastery he could find, and punished himself through his mental condition of scrupulosity, to try to please God just the way he always tried to please his father and failed. Everything Luther did was a result of his childhood trauma, a lifetime of wrestling his own internal demons, feeling like he could never please anyone let alone God. It's a very sad tormented life he lived. Had he joined a more joyful order such as the Franciscans, had he had parents who loved him, had he had a more balanced and safe childhood environment, all would have been very different for him. It's a very sad story indeed.
According to Catholic church teaching God is worse than any abusive parent.
@@loveandideas that's the lie that protestants like to spread in their churches. Until one day their eyes are opened to not only the full love of God's grace in the Catholic church, but the fullness of it's truths spanning 2,000 years. I encourage you to take a deeper look, the way former Protestants like Trent Horn, Dr Scott Han, and Jimmy Akin did. It doesn't happen over night, or by engaging in endless debates on UA-cam, but by informing oneself, reading, listening, praying. Praying for you.