A SGM sicks the MP's on a Chaplain for wearing headphones?!
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- Опубліковано 1 жов 2024
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A SGM, on the Military Camp Buehring in Kuwait, had MP's snatch an O-3 Chaplain up out of his civilian PTs an into the paddy wagon for wearing headphones on post. One of the most iconic SGM pet peeves has come to fruition. nearly as well known as staying off the grass the no PT in headphones outside is on almost every US Military Post's ten commandments.
The views expressed on this page or any derivative therefrom are those of myself and do not reflect the official policy or position of the Department of Defense, the New York Army National Guard, or U.S. Government. ~ A.C.
Source - taskandpurpose...
Here is one for you. SGM told us at the time "You can't wear your soft cap outside of the motorpool and you can't wear your beret in the motorpool." So we had to bring our berets and soft caps with us every day.
Been there. 😁
True story...ours did that too.
this is what im talking about
82nd
I imagine a bunch of mechanics carrying a backpack full of clothes with them like a bunch of silly goobers.
SGM: For safety reasons, in this winter, you have to wear a scarf.
CPL: Respectfully, sir, I have to use the plasma torch.
SGM: I don't see how that's relevant, now put on the scarf!
CPL (1 hour later): 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
You should mention the other chaplain picked him up.
Jesus homies ride together and die together.
Basement Jesus approves
Bro you have to finish it.
Jesus homies ride together, we die together. Chaplains for life!
@@AdmiralHalimesh Goddamn that just killed me again. True Jesus men
SOUL SQUAD FALLLL IN!!!
@@AdmiralHalimesh shouldn't it be "jesus homies ride together, die together, rise 3 days later together"?
Angry Cops over here lookin like a buff Dr. Phil.
I'm copying this
LOOK I SAWED THIS BOAT IN HALF BY
PURE RAGE NOW LETS SEE IF THE WILL TO LIVE OF THE PVTS CAN HOLD IT BACK TOGETHER
The alternate universe Dr Phil
@@notchs0son wrong Phil
@@bobcat420 shhhh no it still would work except he caused the need for therapy
Our entire division wasn’t allowed to roll our sleeves in the summer because some general had a skin condition. So if he couldn’t, no one could. I wish I was making this up.
“Why is our retention so low?”
Sounds like the typical f**king by the big green weenie
My dad has a story. They were marching for hours. It was late and cold. It took them awhile to set up camp. A full bird colonel comes along and decides to make them move the camp.
I have a skin condition too, it’s called, “I don’t want to wear sunblock”
@@jacquelineking5783 The Roman legions had the same problem.
True story:
Kandahar Air Field (KAF)
Blackwater contractor runs route next to airfield.
US Army LtCol sees contractor running without reflective belt and while wearing ear buds.
US Army LtCol pursues blackwater contractor.
US Army LtCol catches up to blackwater contractor and rips his earbuds out while he's running.
Blackwater contractor slams US Army LtCol and rear naked chokes him on the flight line until he passes out.
Investigation launched.
Investigation stops dead in its tracks.
Blackwater contractor found out to be retired Full Bird Colonel.
That's a win! LOL
Beautiful
That's just.......lmao
ROTFLMAO!!!
Deck these non-common sense non-hackers. Mask up and hit the ranks telling them how to work it. Yeah, military will want to investigate an assault on one of these idiot leaders. Its like Donny O'Malley on Vet Tv said in his most recent video with psychologist, this team leader who was great at war got busted down to private because he broke the jaw of this other team leader who tried to haze him. The team leader who tried to haze him got beat at his own game then snitched.
Sgm: I need to see your cac!
Chaplain: no, that's gay
Sgm: (visible rage)
Most underrated coment.
Pin 📌
@@angrynorman8378 agreed
😆
I read this in a New England accent, I was not disappointed
I bet Donut Operator is proud of that mustache
It's the twin, the twin who's nutrients were stolen in the womb by the blue flute ticklers stache. BUT one is closer to regs...so (waving) oh heyyy sar'nt lol
Womb Broom
Now he's just got to figure out where to glue on his man bun.
I would be!
🤣🤣🤣
While driving my crusty old CSM he had me filling the comsec in the truck, because he couldn't figure out these "new radios". So this blue pickup cuts us off and almost runs us off the road. Out pops a sergeant major. Guy walks up to my driver side window and starts screaming to me about base regulations (if you're going to use a communications device while operating a vehicle, the communications device needs to be hands-free). Then I sank as far into my chair as humanly possible as my CSM got out of the truck to go have a no holds barred knife hand screaming match with this other SM. When CSM got back in the truck he gave me quite possibly the most valuable piece of advice any NCO has ever given a specialist. "When you get promoted, don't be a cunt like that."
I was an e4 walking through the motor pool when SGM saw me by myself. He stopped me and asked where my battle buddy was. I replied, Jesus is my battle buddy SGM.... Needless to say I almost met Jesus a few moments later! Hahaha
I'd say this story warrants saluting a lower enlisted, well played!
I love it
was this at basic? or normal unit?
I was active duty 1/16 inf ft riley
@@dukesjeepsandtrails8511 yeah ft Riley is a mess, I was in 5-4 cav and the infantry unit next to us had that battle buddy rule. They always asked us where ours were when we walked into the motor pool and we would just point at our motor pool and walk off. They always lost their shit over it too
I could provide a high quality comment here that adds to this video but I'm not that witty. So I'll just say that's the most realistic hand phone I've ever seen, them pinkies.
How are you 11 hrs ago when the video was released 6 mins ago?
@@REDACTYD time traveling ninja son!
It says 17 second for me
im made for it
Was thinking the same thing lmao
As a national guard chaplain, I can assure you, the only thing more out of regs than my haircut is my attitude. Errah.
Thank you for your service to both our nation and to our service men/women. Keep up the good work, our brave men and women need a good chaplain from time to time!
It's my pleasure! I had enough bad chaplains in the Marines to hopefully know what NOT to be now that I'm in the Army.
Now if I could just stop people from assuming that my job is to plan MWR events and give out candy, I could do my actual job. :D
@@ChristianCombatives I was just gonna ask you for some candy though.....
I ated it all and got fat :(
@American with American made PTSD I am at least 80 pounds heavier than what the Marine Corps will put up with. Their loss, I love my big beautiful body.... (weeps into a box of donuts)
I was stationed as a Corporal at Camp Lejeune while in the Marines. The rule was no wearing of PT gear inside any businesses on base. I was getting gas on base in PT gear but was going to pay at the pump. I was about to insert my card when I hear “hey devil dog” from a big black Gunny. I ignored him at first Bc he was saying “devil dog” on an MC base and could’ve been talking to anyone. I insert my debit card and he says loudly “hey devil dog” so I look at him and said “how can I help you sir?” He said “first off I’m a gunny and you’re not supposed to go into any establishments on base in PT gear!” I said “roger that gunny, I’m paying at the pump and not going inside.” He then says “ you need to phone a friend or girlfriend if you need gas because you’re not getting it here in PT gear!” I then told him “I guess I’ll get it off base in PT gear” as I’m taking my card out and he then tells me “ that’s also against the rules” and I then went to a parking lot and sat in my vehicle until that dickhead left the gas station and went back and got my gas in PT gear. A lot of good soldiers, sailors, and Marines get out of the military Bc of Karens running around like hall monitors.
You're off base. I'd tell gunny I could get gas in a fucking clown suit if I want.
You have got NO F'ing idea. Sad thing is that most of them get promoted first. Usually it happens before anyone finds out that they are blue falcons, just barely know their yob. (it's not my yob man) or are complete cowards.
yuppp
Dude you ain't even joking. It's why I got out of the Navy. Shitbag first classes trying to make chief, running around dry snitching and bullying E4 and belows because they know some senior or master chief is watching. Then when they do get promoted, they are the worst form of petty tyrants and micro managers imaginable because their rank is the only leadership tool they know how to use.
Should have asked him to put it for you to see if he cared about the troops. Semper Fi
"Don't mess with me; I have the power of God and Raycon on my side!"
Use the promo code “JESUS4LYFE” for 30% off raycon earbuds.
@@davidritchie9344 wireless earbuds and beanies are a match made in heaven. If i had had raycons in hs I would have been wearing a beanie in every class, listening to music
Rays con more like it
@@thegreywolfe12 I like my e25’s. Can’t justify 200+ for earphones I might lose at any time.
I'm dead
When I waa a Drill Sergeant at Fort Jackson we would alternate male /female cycles. During female cycles the Post SGM would run around with binos and hiding in bushes etc.. Trying to find Drill Sergeants doing something wrong.
One morning Post SGM had me report to his office, said he had heard me singing nasty cadence with a female platoon.
I answered back NO SGM No you did not!
That infuriated the SGM he sprang out of his chair all 128 lbs of him and slammed his hands on his desk. He said I heard you Sargeant I heard you say "Fore Play"!!!
As the SGM was having his meltdown I was running through my head what he might have heard??
Then it dawned on me...
During morning PT I was singing the cadence "Up in the morning at the break of day, we do PT just "for play..."
The only reply from SGM was get out of my office SGT.
That’s how you know SGM have nothing better to do😂
That's how you know his mind is in the gutter!
Just.....what....okay guys and gals, we are training you to be the world premiere fighting force, to know and be able to use combat life saving skills but say the word foreplay and GTFO
It feels like Shawn didn’t finish his sentence
GTFO, short hand for get the fuck out
While I was overseas my Captain notified a Sergeant that his taillight was out. Later that day he was asked to give a statement at the MP station about said taillight. He was then detained at the MP station for “not reporting” the damaged property and lost his license to drive on post. After he was released he walked to the parking lot and reported every MP vehicle for having a scratch on it.
thats the level of petty I was looking for!
this is basically what happens in middle school and high school when your friends sell you out
@@michaelslaton9477
They asked for it.
Bet your ass I'd be up bright and early every week to inspect the MP's vehicles, and nitpick every fucking "problem" with them. God forbid there be an actual mechanical issue, cuz I'd raise hell when I found one
Glad to see America's tax dollars at work.
I had a guy in civies tell me I wasn’t allowed to be in the commissary with a gun. I’m a master at arms.... literally security for the base...🤦♀️
😂😂😂
I’m just gonna take a seat if that’s ok with you
Imagine responding to armed suspect at the commissary, then finding out it’s you…
gotta love those idiots. back when I was a MA2 before going officer I had a idiot of course in Bahrain try to grab my gun because he thought it would be funny. Ya it was real funny for him to go on the ground at gunpoint that was a real barrel of laughs. God how I hate NSA Bahrain
imagine the armed forces being armed...
Here's one for you in 2004 at fob Salerno Afghanistan I got shot and my left arm was damaged and it was the first time I'd ever been prescribed opiates LOL. Now granted this was somewhat my fault but I was carrying items back from the PX in my right hand because I couldn't use my left and it was muddy outside from snow melting. This army Sergeant Major and a major general are walking by and I just stopped and stood at attention and have the greeting of the day without saluting. Keep in mind I was the only Marine back at my base because I was the only one flown back and the rest of my unit were still out laying hate and everyone but this asshole knew I was the one that got shot. So he commences to start chewing my ass out and telling me what a disgusting person I am for not saluting a general when I walked by. Funny thing is, he's the one that ended up getting his ass chewed just a little because the Major General was understanding and knew that I was the one that got shot because he came in the medical tent when it happened and gave me his coin. No big deal just a fun little story.
I got there in Jan of 05 and think I know who you’re talking about. I was Air Force and he’s the same guy that that said we had to adhere to army dress and appearance and would walk around trying to correct how we wore our uniforms.
@@usaf483 Did you get there right when the 82nd replaced us and we moved to JBAD and then to build JAF? If so that is the time I got there in 2004 and then got hit on January 11th 05.
LOL! All the Generals and high ranking officers I met are cool and mellow. Doesn't surprise me the General would scold the SGM.
@Russell Gerdes Reading that gave me a stroke.
@@allenkennedy99 I think he was having a stroke writing it
While in afghanistan our SGM strongly encouraged everyone to buy deployment hats...when we got them we were banned by the same SGM from wearing said hats
What's a deployment hat? We had a Co. T-shirt from deployment, and were allowed to wear them on certain Co. PT days. Same concept?
why am I not surprised by that
usually just a camo ballcap. we had the same our ltc approved them then had brigade csm show up and through a fit about regs. mind you this is the same guy that didn't wear shoes to pt.
Why?
@@Seth9809 i cannot answer that but he looked like a troll and had a thick ass layer of calluses on his feet. just don't know
"If you're wearing white socks, you can't enter the chow hall." This one i heard by more than one USMC 1stSgt in Helmand.
Also must be changed out of flight suit or frog utilities before entering chow hall. Don't care if you just came off a patrol and the chow hall is about to close.
Calling my cloth “rainbow gear” like what am I, a Crayola pack???
I haven't worn white socks in 20 years. Also I had a flight suit solely for the purpose of not having to wear my cammies to the chow hall or PX when I was in Fallujah.
Had one (also in Helmand) where my platoon just got back from a firefight and the chow hall NCOIC barred us from entering "because we were dirty". Needless to say, our platoon commander (a SSgt; yes, not an officer due to operational changes to our company TO&E) chewed him the fuck out til he let us in.
@@bryonmyers1058 Spartan kids were expected to steal food and were only punished for getting caught, not for stealing... take a hint from history and make it work child-
I was AF stationed at Ft Gordon where they trained the Signal Corps. There was an CWO3 Ranger in my language refresher course and as were were walking from chow back to class he got a phone call. We stopped (as was the rule att) so he could answer and as he did, a DI from one of the training groups saw him, assumed he was lower enlisted and proceeded to start screaming at him as he approached us. The CWO looked at me and said "watch this." He took several seconds of berating before he turned his head so the DI could see the rank on his beret. The DI froze and started apologizing. CWO calmly thanks him for "enforcing the standard" and ends with "But in the future SSG, if you're gonna correct someone, make sure and TAKE YOUR FUCKING HANDS OUT OF YOUR POCKET!" SSG startles and takes visible steps backwards before saluting with a "Yes, sir. Have a good day, sir." As an Air Force SSgt, this was pure hilarity.
gold
I hated Ft Gordon with a passion.
That really irritated during my service. Sailors/marines with their hands in their pockets in uniform. Military bearing PEOPLE. Some think it is dumb, but when I served we demanded military bearing be followed at all times. Things have changed obviously, but you see how that is working out. Discipline matters. Chief Electronics Technician Submarines (RO) (SS/IDW) Retired Hooyah!
We weren’t allowed to talk inside the shop one day because the LT said we were “too” loud for her liking so she made us sit in silence. Which didn’t really work being we were in a call center for the Navy ships help desk. So we just called each other on the landlines and talked anyway and she couldn’t say anything about it.
Lol not that this always goes well, but I've heard of people actually following the orders to a T (which Fs everything up) then someone up the food chain is pissed that someone decided make stupid rules and piss everyone off.
@@joeb6750 In those cases, I used to ask for the dumb orders in writing. I had a very dumb LT, and the request for written orders tended to wake him up.
Let me guess. She had corn rows?
@@infadel885 that would make it even funnier because the women with corn rows are usually the loudest
I'm just imagining the Chaplin trying to wave his hand like a Jedi: "You have no power over me."
"This isn't the bust you're looking for"
Yours would be more like King Théoden in Two Towers before Gandalf breaks the spell on him.
Silly Chaplin, only Warrant Officers have that ability.
I think you're mixing up Star Wars and Lord of the Rings.
'This is not the insurgent you are looking for'
I’m still waiting for AC to hit 1 million so we can see his basic training video.. I bet that will be hilarious 😂
Odds on whether his pinkies are crooked or straight in the Training Vid? :)
Crooked and same can’t wait for the vid
That's why I'm here. Lol
2010, I was assigned to a 3-Star HQ and we just came back from Iraq. This was my 4th combat tour since 9/11. We had a mass PT formation on the first Monday after everyone got back. Now, while deployed, I was promoted to CW3 and I was instantly granted the ability to see beyond all bullshit. I rolled up to the PT formation with my battered silver coffee cup, drinking my precious coffee before PT. Out of nowhere, this SGM from the G3 starts screaming at me for having the SHEER AUDACITY to come to the parade field/PT formation area with a coffee cup. He DEMANDED to know who was my NCO and who did I think I was. I introduced myself and kept drinking my coffee. Later that day, my boss, an O6 COL, came up to me and mentioned that an irate SGM was throwing a fit about my coffee cup. He asked me to either leave it at my car or just skip PT formation.
I even made a point to say hi to him as I was out processing the unit for a Joint assignment. He hated my guts.
F*k that SGM. I'll drink my coffee wherever and whenever I want.
Why was your coffee cup battered though ? I thought CWOs got issued one? 🤣
He was tripping 😒
@@chadwells7562 survived 2 trips to Iraq and multiple jumps. Was my "nice" semi-insulated field coffee cup. Never washed it. Of course, I never added any creamer or sugar or any other bullshit to my coffee. Drank it black like my heart.
Even as a kid I was taught not to fuck with CWs. That's some patience on your part.
By O2, I learned to treat everyone in PT uniform with respect or ambivalence.
At O3, I had a CW4, CW3, and 2 CW2's under my command. I couldn't really say "no", but I could send them on assignments where I didn't want "no" for an answer. 😉
CSM: get off my grass
PSG: why can we do tough pt on grass but can’t walk across it while in duty uniform?
CSM: go get your 1SG
this man is gonna be a general with all this common sense
@@AngryCops 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Careful, common sense is illegal in the Army.
@@AngryCops idk...remember that general on the news who was shooting an AR15 like a storm trooper and said “full semi automatic “
@@MoparRinagade Well it wasn’t semi-semi-Automatic so
Chaplain: **exists to encourage the soldiers and talk with them about problems, but most importantly spread the Gospel and remind them of God's protection**
Also Chaplain: **vibing to relieve stress**
SGM: "yo go get him lmao"
well chaplain did give the mps some mandatory fun.
That would’ve surprised me…
In the 60’s. Too bad hating religion is so mainstream now.
@@wolfetteplays8894 lmao not it isn’t. Besides, people are smarter now then back then lol.
@@nathanialhumphrey7137 Than***
@@nowthisis2stupid lmao
"A defense official told Military Times that one soldier who went to retrieve Thomas jokingly brought along a nail file tucked away inside a Bible, presumably to aid the holy man’s escape."
"Sergeant Major of the Universe" should be a space force rank.
“Hey guys we don’t have real rounds so just fake the recoil and say out loud -budget cuts-“
We had to do that during fire season at Camp Pendleton. Run around yelling bang bang at each other like a bunch of little kids
See? There’s benefits to being in the Army. Chiefly: budget cuts won’t affect your ammo usage
Budget cuts? Is 700b $ not enough?
@@042Ghostmaker The military budget pays the salaries, training, and health care of uniformed and civilian personnel, maintains arms, equipment and facilities, funds operations, and develops and buys new items. The budget funds five branches of the U.S. military: the Army, Marine Corps, Navy, Air Force and Space Force.
as a conscript we had a camp (1week long) where we ran out of blanks on the 2nd day. we were told there was no more blanks at base either. We just ran around the rest of the week going "pew pew pew"
The 'stache kinda makes you look like a younger Dr. Phil.
Or an angrier one.
@@Supervillain725 Definitely an angrier one. And balder.
Dr. ill... get it!
The army’s Dr. Phil... It took me a second lol
Angry Doc
Being a Warrant Officer is the only thing that could have added to the chappy's disregard for the rules.
That's a solid point there is a hierarchy of skating and IDGAF. I forgot about CWO's.
Imagine if he came over from CWO land to work for Jesus
Do warrant Officers not give af about rules?
CWO cant be held. The MP would have checked the cell and there would be nothing there but a hot cup of coffee.
@@cameronhukari299 Warrants do not GAF about them.
My friend was smoking and joking with a bunch of other Marines. It was one of those hurry up and wait moments. They had been waiting for like 3 hours, so they were shooting the shit, and laughing, when a First Sergeant walked by and said, “Hey Marines, secure that happiness!!”
"Morale is optional". Not sure where I heard that but a lot of people seem to believe it.
Sounds like a par for the course.
Secure the fun.
We had a base SgtMaj complain about how we were speeding for QRF. So he replaced the tank tracks speed bumps with 26inch talk cement speed bumps. That completely destroyed every base bus. Well when he saw that we were driving around his speed bumps. He erected hesco barriers along the road. Which eliminated the run path. Needless to say out Quick Reaction Force turned into a “moderate amount of speed reaction force.”
When safety impacts readiness, it isn't safe no more.
You need Fort Hood stories
I have too many fort Hood stories... HOOOLLYY FUCK.. im one of the JAGs for hood
Yes the Great Place and Hoodisms. At 1655 for revelelry even if it hadn't gone off yet we would stand at ease. And when it went off we'd go to attention inside the building and salute, while in doors.
I don't give a damn that it's only 20 degrees outside! I SAID TAKE THAT FLEECE CAP OFF!!
What about Fort Polk?
Wasn’t there a food fight over chocolate milk in fort hood
"If you're on time, you're late. But I don't want any of you here early, because then I have to come in early. Be on time."
Wait, what? ...So I'm supposed to always be late at this Unit???
Allow me to explain your failure. You see, you're assuming that there is a right answer. Rookie mistake. There is only wrong answers. Every situation you encounter is just an opportunity for the leadership to get mad. Just embrace it and accept that you will get chewed out if your boss is in a bad mood. As long as you get your job done, you'll make to the end of your contract with no UCMJ actions.
@@colinsanders9397 See this here , this is doing God's work.
This is true esprit de corps.
@@colinsanders9397 "As long as you get your job done, you'll make to the end of your contract with no UCMJ actions."
This is the funniest joke in the whole comment section.
@@bigdiccmarty9335 fair enough. I should have clarified "You'll maximize your chances of getting to the end of your contract with no UCMJ actions."
Anyone else devastated he he didn’t rhyme “Jesus is cool” with “this dude is a fool”?
I was saying that in my head!
Or "this dude is a tool"
He's a Drill, of course he's going to devastate us.
Sgm when someone goes missing: I sleep
Sgm when someone is wearing earbuds: R E A L S H I T
SGM when someone dies: sleep
Always hated the no smoking and waking. lol
"...not unauthorized, but it is highly frowned upon." -a phrase known by every military smoker circa 2008.
This is the last place I would’ve thought to have seen you 🤯
Don't be like me and salute an officer with one in your salute hand. lol
@@CODE-BROWN you did what!?
I've never cared. I walk around smoking like a old Buick. 😂
" Real life can be so ridiculous, you'd think it was fiction "
Angry cops.
Lol I read this at the same time he said it
Lmao thank u for saying CAC card
Common Access Card Card.
Just because it isnt perfect doesnt mean it's not correct and anyone in the military who doesn't say CAC card is a nub
Make sure you always have positive control of your CAC....
@@silntstl Keep your CAC in your pants so you don’t lose it.
The real wizards say Cacard.
I was stationed at the former "Sandpoint NS" back in the early 90's. They used our hangars to film much of "Sleepless in Seattle"(there were mock up's of the Empire State building and other houses). Anyhoo....we were told we couldn't talk to ANY of the movie people. Actors, producers, carpenters....whatever. Then one morning, I was walking past their set where they had a big buffet breakfast out for them (outside) and I heard "Hey, want some coffee"? It was Tom Hanks asking if I wanted a coffee with him. Needless to say....I broke the F outta that rule. Super cool guy and then says "Hey....wanna see Meg outta makeup"? and went and got Meg Ryan outta her trailer to sit with us. I was sweating bullets....but ended up talking baseball, drinking coffee and eating a danish with them!lol!
Pics or it didn’t happen
@@knndyskful 90s man.
Back when she was still hot. Cool story.
The 90's where great
That’s fucking awesome!
You can bet the SGM had a bone to pick with that chaplain before he saw those headphones.
Nah, the bone was probably just stuck up his butt in general for some other reason. Likely something to do with diminishing standards...I dunno perhaps the prospect of an Army that has never been shark attacked straight from day 1 in basic.
Not really. SGM did a great job because it is the little things that you look for to determine if someone is authorized to be there. The headphones opened the door to investigate the individual and the lack of ID gave reason for the detainment. This SGM should be applauded for his attention to detail.
@@parawill7074 dude I don’t think your having people trying to sneak into the national guard
@@notchs0son much less, strolling around base in headphones, dressed as a chaplain...
@@parawill7074 national guard is ass and the SGM is just a wanna be hard ass.
"Don't directly piss on the urinal cakes" still don't know why.
How’d you like to be the pecker checker that was in charge of policing that!
Degrades them faster I'd imagine...
Might splash back on you lol
"HEY! HOLD YOUR FIRE GENTLEMEN! I can hear the distinct sound of urine landing on a urinal cake. If the person responsible doesnt come forward now, everyone in here is getting a counseling statement."
@@816rob1 pissing in the stand up toilet period will result in splash back 🤪
I love hearing these kind of stories while wrapped up in the comfort of my DD214.
It’s glorious isn’t it 😂☠️
Same. Thanks Army, for my current career in Intelligence in the private sector, but also suck it for making it impossible to retain people who give a shit at a bargain-basement price.
It does heal all wounds doesn't it?
Me too.
Rumor has it his mustache has 4 confirmed kills.
2 of them with an E-Tool, one with a Menu 14 MRE, and one it had to strangle with its bare hairs.
They didn't count the UA-cam kills😂
Here's one for you. When I was in the Navy, you were not allowed to wear your working uniform off base. Well, one day, my CMC decided that you were not allowed to wear PT gear off the ship, unless you were going for a run on base. It just so happened that I lived close enough to base that I would ride my bike and in doing so, I wore PT gear to and from home. I tried to leave to go home, because I didn't have any other clothing, and wasn't allowed to leave the Quarter Deck. I had to hand walk an emergency request chit up my chain, just so I could wear PT gear off the ship and go home.
Indeed some of the rules are nuts. It happened in my old ship (thanks for the flashback).
It didn't happen to me, but to a shipmate of mine. Several ships done that from time to time.
Things like this are what happens when someone who's so far removed from the situation on ground is making all the rules the bois have to follow and suffer through
I was wearing really tight pt shorts and walked by the front of my unit while SgtMaj was out. He looks at me and says "hey I can see your heartbeat devil dont wear that shit again" I think he has a crush on me
"Don't run without a reflective belt." Looks at 17 hours of North Dakota sun.
*looks at 24 hour solstice of Alaskan sun
Wasn't that a thing in Afghan as well? or was that just for cleanup crews?
My unit up at wainwright in alaska only makes us wear PT belts when it actually gets dark again around PT hours
You got stationed in North Dakota?
One of the most mentally and emotionally traumatized men I ever met in the military was a chaplain. He watched a Soldier he had been working with for a long time hang himself on a Skype call and it happened so fast they could not get to the soldier in time. He just had to watch it while trying to beg him not to do it. Crazy when you think about it
HOLY SHIT DUDE! Poor guy!
A huge problem with the military is that troops with mental health issues run to the chaplain instead of going to Behavioral Health. The simple fact is that the Chaplin is not qualified to determine if someone is a risk to themselves or others.
In Bosnia a Chaplin had a soldier shoot himself in front of him in his office.
I'll stand by for the "Do Do Do Do, Jesus is cool!" T-shirt and potential basement Jesus tie in...
I second that!
When I was in MNF-I and serving on Camp Slayer in 2007, our CG (who was the S-2 under Petraeus) went to a briefing in the Green Zone. His flight back actually left an hour earlier than expected and we didn't hear about it until he was already in the air. So I had to rush out and slap on the GO plates, jump in the land cruiser, then hall ass to get to the helipad on Camp Victory before he landed. Now this is normally a half hour drive and I needed to be there in less time than that because the flight is much shorter.
So here I am, an E5 at the time, hauling butt at double the posted speed limits through Slayer, under Route Irish (which is how you got from Slayer to Victory), and onto Victory. I was driving a black land cruiser with black tinted windows and 2-Star GO plates on it. So of course a Camp Victory MP pulls me over. This ratty looking E2 who took forever to come up to me and when I jumped out of the truck to started shouting at him to hurry the F up, he became even more of a dip shit. Talking 'bout "do you know why I pulled you over?" and I was like "Yea, now hurry up the general is landing in a couple minutes". So he takes his time writing the ticket. Finally he gets to the point where he needs my commander, so I tell him Major General L*BEEP*. And he is all no no, who do you actually work for so I repeat myself. Finally he tries no, who is your boss? And I told him "MF'er, did you miss the stars on the plate when you walked up?" So he finishes writing out the ticket and I tell him I have to drive even faster, so if he wants to pull me over again he can chase me all the way to the heliport. I peeled out of there and peppered the heck out of him with gravel, but he didn't chase me. I could have told him I worked for CW5 A*BEEP* who was my rater or COL D*BEEP* who was actually my senior rater rather then the 2 star who was my reviewer, but F' him I was driving the general's truck.
So I manage to pull up at heliport just as the bird was flaring out for a landing. Hopped out, met the general, grabbed his bags, and got him in the vehicle. It seems some ground fire had caused the bird to divert from their expected course which actually made the flight take enough time that I just managed to beat it. Fine by me, don't want the general sitting around waiting. Told him I got a ticket on the way and he asked for it. Looked it over, said ok, and crumpled it up before tossing it in the back. Damn it, I'm going to have to find that thing. But nothing more was said of it and the MPs didn't call. Now if you have ever gotten a ticket on a camp in Iraq, trust me the MPs will call your unit. Often that same day. So something was up here.
So a few days later, when I had some free time I made the drive down to the MP station, because you know, I have to drive on the base. Kinda hard to drive the general or drop off the daily read book for Petraeus when you can't. Told the guy at the desk I was there because they never got a hold of my unit. He couldn't find my name in the system, did I have the ticket? Yes I did and here you go. Then he told me to wait and went to get the NCOIC on duty at the time. Now this guy was a squared away and rather grumpy SFC. So I told him who I was, where I got the ticket, and what I was doing at the time. "So you were going to pick up your general who was flying in early?" Yep. "And you were driving his vehicle, with his plates?" Yep. "And you told the general?" Why do you think the ticket is crumpled up? "Ok, I'll take care of it".
Guess the guy was on duty at the time because the MP SFC ripped into him so loudly we could hear it at the front desk. Something along the lines of "WTF is wrong with you!? You pulled over a general's vehicle with its plates on?! And then held them up when they had somewhere to be?!". The ass chewing was still going on loudly when I left.
Great story
I’m going back to 1991, the workshop bars fridge had died, and in the process of replacing it had left the new one outside the barracks whilst manoeuvring the old one out, In the few minutes this would take, the RSM (Regimental Sergeant Major) was passing by and saw the new fridge and was so incensed by the offence of having something stain his perfectly kept areas that he called the Regimental Police out to remove it and lock it up in a cell. The offending fridge stayed in that cell for a full 48 hours until released back into the grateful arms of the Technicians who no longer had to endure warm lager. Anyway. Thanks for being so entertaining and please keep up the great work.
Regimental police? You must not be American, we don’t have regimental police
Uh duh! Since when does the US Army have a work shop bar serving beer? It's a British thing trust me. I spent some time on the HMS Andromeda where they had a cozy little bar. Unthinkable in the USN.
They detained the fridge for as long as they could legally? Were they hoping it would crack and tell them where the toaster stashed the cocaine? lol
@@knndyskful I was a British Soldier and Regimental Police were unit based camp guards,, all units had them, drawn from the unit and responsible for discipline and custody at the Battalion level, t the behest of the RSM, the highest ranking Warrant Officer.
Hope that helps.
@@kenehrett6685 absolutely right, I don’t know if they still do, but once upon a time a unit would have bars at the company level, ran by the unit, by a serving soldier taken off normal duties to run a pub basically. Great days.
Where is this guys Assistant? The Chaplain Assistant is there to keep them from getting in trouble like this 🤣
Nobody above O-2 should walk around by themselves. An E-4 and above should be present at all times
I know right?! I was wondering where his fat E-4 minion was in all this, maybe fell out of the run a couple miles back.
@@guyver441 they ride in a vehicle with refreshments for troops around the Chaplain, he must of had to stop and stock back up lol.
Could have been driving around introducing himself too. I was at a M320 range recently and the chap assistant showed up out of nowhere, introduced himself, gave us his and the Chaplins number, talked about awareness so people can try and stop committing suicide, then scuttled off
Lol that was one of my MOS choices I chose radio operator instead. I thought hmm maybe an easy job to go for tho and sounds like it was.
"All weapons must be cleared prior to entering the chow hall."
Not a bad rule. Completely understand why it exists.
But I took issue with it. You see, my unit had shipped all the weapons out to Kuwait before I even arrived from basic.
This means that the only "weapon" I had to clear before entering the chow hall for the first few days was.. my fucking bayonet.
Which I cleared, dutifully. Zero chance of accidental discharge.
that is to funny, when was this
This is the funniest shit ever. Point in a safe direction. Unsheathe, sheathe, yell clear
I bet you really got you CSM hard doin that too
Ensure blade is on safe
remove the source of sharpness
Lock blade to the rear
Inspect the Blade
Blade is clear
Release the Blade
Place the blade on SEMI
Squeeze the blade
Charge the Blade
Place the blade on SAFE
Blade is clear!
Perfect. My pet peeve is that firearms are referred to as "weapons" and not "firearms" throughout the military (and law enforcement, I believe). There are a shit ton of things that can be weapons, including firearms, blades, batons, etc., and specificity should be the rule.
The Army would be LOST without career Specialists. They're the smartest soldiers in the ranks.
Specialist zach did everything
We are the glue that keeps it all together...
NCO wants to tell at someone, but wants to keep his marriage. Yells at specialist.
NCO needs something done asap cuz he's been putting it off for days. Specialist save the day.
@@HangingWithEpstein specialists really are the best
Game recognizes game
Dam straight. They wanted me to go to PLDC to get promoted, but at the same time needed me at the border because they had over-committed the off-border platoons. Oh yeah, and because we needed 999 promotion points to be promoted (17K/96R). We were short-staffed but had too many E-5 +^ ETS'd after that tour.
How about having to wear a reflective belt while on a blackout COP in Afghanistan.
Are they literally trying to turn you into mortar bait?
Wait! I get it!! I cracked the code! The ghost of Carlos Hathcock paid your NCOs to give that order so that you could be sniper bait if any hostile snipers were out there, so that Hathcock’s ghost could waste them!
Are your own COs trying to kill you. What kind of a psychopath would order you to wear reflective belts while in a war zone.
Dude! That's nuts. Might as well turn a strobe on
But how will you stay safe outside the wire on a night mission without a PT belt to protect you? /s
At annual training this past week we had to wear our masks while sleeping to prevent covid while we were already spaced out 10 ft apart...
Wow! Seems like a good way to get a mold sickness.
well you might get up in the middle of the night for a snuggle. you never know. covid's scawwy after 10pm.
Wtf.. That is so bizarre, the world has been over taken by paranoid nanny state Karens
According to Fort Hood, you can't catch the rona if you're wearing OCPs 24/7. If you're not actively doing PT at that specific point in time, PTs aren't authorized. God forbid CSM sees you step outside your barracks in civillians
After running circuit drills for an hour straight, I'm marching my soldiers back to barracks about 5 minutes before the official end of PT. The BN CSM stops me and says that we should be training to time, that brining my soldiers back to the barracks prior to the 'official' end of PT was shortchanging them.. So I look at the CSM who is wearing a clean and dry PT uniform, with no visible sweat anywhere, then I look at my thoroughly sweat soaked squad...and I say 'roger Sergeant Major'. I call the squad to attention and say 'be at the motor pool at 0900 according to previous stated standards. You are dismissed to PT on your own for the next (look at my watch) 3 minutes. Dismissed'.
I then turned to the CSM, gave him the greeting of the day and moved out smartly.
Fuck yeah.
If any story could convince people not to enlist this here is it just due to the hypocrisy.
Not being able to drink from a bottle and walk at the same time always thought that one was dumb got so used to it that it took me almost 4 months after I got out to realise I could walk and drink at the same time
I'm a civilian that has to go to a particular building on one base, where we aren't allowed to have permanent credentials but we had a deal where we could always come on as visitors without any prior paperwork or a sponsor. However, visitors aren't allowed to bring cell phones past the ECF so my agency made a deal where we could bring our agency phones past despite that rule. In order to prove that our phones were actually agency phones, we had to dial the ECF desk with an internal-only number while standing in front of the security staff.
The other funny thing about this is that they have a big sign with a list of contraband items, including cell phones. In order to get the pass they tell me to read the sign and state that I don't have any of those items, while holding a cell phone in my hand.
Man,those Chaplain's are getting out of hand.
You’re a clone captain.
And how often do you say that
@@basically3z310 I'm a wat?
But hey man have you seen that new Cold War cinematics dude puts his headphones on and then immediately kgb slice his throat and they break into the nuke base during a nuclear test procedure
😂😂😂
Chaplain needs basement Jesus
EVERYBODY needs basement Jesus.....
AC missed a real opportunity there.
I think that poor mp who got caught in the middle of the pissing match needs Basement Jesus most of all.
Dang. Thought I thought of Basement Jesus first.
@@JohnDc Basement Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life ! Praise basement Jesus!
And the army wonders why retention rates are so low.
"Doot-do-do-do, Jesus is cool, I'm in charge, and this guy's super mad about... nothing."
Can I get this on a shirt?
The one that always drove me absolutely crazy was that people could get off the ship with no problem at all while wearing leather and spikes and other crazy misfit crap but me, wearing a collared button down shirt, couldn't leave the ship unless I tucked it in first
easy fix... tuck it in, and then as soon as you are off the ship, but still within their eyesight, untuck it!
@@jasonpenn5476 Tuck it in, leave your hand directly in front and in the rear just a moment too long (don't need to actually touch anything), and go to shake their hand to thank them for catching you slipping.
What kind of Village People boat were you on with leather daddies and spiked collars?
@@MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD Thats the Navy for you
Wearing headphones on post
The worst crime in the UCMJ
Not even those being accused of murder would dare commit this horrific crime
Ft Hood can attest to that .
It’s like in Alice’s Restaurant where everyone moves to the end of the bench away from the most heinous of all, the litterbug.
“And I, I walked over to the, to the bench there, and there is, Group W's
where they put you if you may not be moral enough to join the army after
committing your special crime, and there was all kinds of mean nasty ugly
looking people on the bench there. Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Father
rapers! Father rapers sitting right there on the bench next to me! And
they was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible crime-type guys sitting on the
bench next to me. And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanest
father raper of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean 'n' ugly
'n' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of things and he sat down next to me
and said, "Kid, whad'ya get?" I said, "I didn't get nothing, I had to pay
$50 and pick up the garbage." He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?"
And I said, "Littering." And they all moved away from me on the bench
there, and the hairy eyeball and all kinds of mean nasty things, till I
said, "And creating a nuisance." And they all came back, shook my hand,
and we had a great time on the bench, talkin about crime, mother stabbing,
father raping, all kinds of groovy things that we was talking about on the
bench. And everything was fine, we was smoking cigarettes and all kinds of
things, until the Sargeant came over, had some paper in his hand, held it
up and said...”
Ft hoods existence is a UCMJ violation
The story has to be a little misconstrued because the MPs cannot take someone into custody on an administrative violation. It had to be because he refused to identify which is semantics if he didnt have his id but the way the story was reported we think the MPs were used and implemented because he was wearing headphones. However whenever in a host country everything gets taken up a notch. But I'll bet MPs are getting a lesson on when and when not to take someone into custody.
But how is the murderer supposed to listen to his Stabby Stab Playlist?
Gunnys on the third floor of the barracks, sees a marine with his hands in his pockets, calls him out. Said marine looks at him takes his hands out, then rams em back in and carries on with his conversation.
Gunny flies down stairs to the marine, whips him around by the shoulder and commenced berating and knife handing the individual. Knife hand became a salute, and berating became a proper greeting of the day 😆
Being in an engineer/construction unit with the PAARNG, during AT, it was hot af. 100+ degrees everyday, putting up drywall, insulation, running wires, etc. So we had our sleeves a little undone. CSM and Battalion Commander come to the job site and, “You need to have your sleeves cuffed. Otherwise it looks unprofessional. We’re the Army, we need to look professional while on Garrison. And have your masks on at all times to prevent the spread of COVID.” We weren’t even supposed to be at AT this past year. 🤣 But I guess we were supposed to just heat cat because ✨professionalism.✨
Literally higher ups are so disconnected with reality. I'm sure they know that they're irrelevant. They just try to find stupid shit to do to add meaning to their jobs.
What is the Army procedure for getting heat stroke? Do you need to pass out and fall away from the work area/other engineers, as to prevent slowing down the project?
Any direction is ok... as long as it's at attention!
Would have been hilarious if all of you started to heat cat one after the other until the whole unit was laid out. Watching the CSM stoke out would be worth it.
@@txspyrate4446 what's cat?
2003 82nd ABN, Firbase in Afghanistan: "Why are these sandbags outside the tents so dirty? Get them cleaned up." Had to sweep dust and dirt off of burlap sandbags.
Rickie Barrett: yup plz send me to burn shit.its much more fun.ty
So you had to clean sand of sandbags in a desert.... yeah that's not a waste of time xD
When leaving mandatory PT, the base SGM and Base CO where being driven by and their driver stopped and let me and some junior marines cross the road. Then the base SGM proceeded to chew me out for giving a thank you wave. My unit was the ugly duckling on the base, because non of us answered to either one of them as we were considered “special” and yes all special means in the marine corps is that we just get scratch and sniff markers...
I second the question asked by Kuuryo. I don't need sleep. I need answers.
You should lat move to the airwing. Being able to do your job without having to kiss ass.
There’s no fucking way that this guy has never forgotten his Cac in the computer and gone home. Nothing worse than than having to get an escort on base the next morning and finding it frozen in the middle of a gallon of water.
Yeah. We've all left our CAC in the computer at least once. I received mine wrapped in a hefty amount of tape. Good times.
@@James-yi1vk yep, it’s super fun when the tape peels your picture off. 😂
You never directly freeze or tape one of those things as you can actually destroy them that way and you're now in trouble for destruction of government property if someone wants to push it (seen a few people do so)
@@ruthgar9753 yeah, we were aircrew so fuckery was expected to some extent 😂😂😂
@@ruthgar9753 it didn't damage my CAC. I was able to use a razor blade to get the tape off. Took awhile.
My platoon was once told "YOU WILL NOT UTILIZE THE WARM UP TENT UNTIL THE SNOT FREEZES IN YOUR NOSTRILS!!!!"
Nothing like fucking up movement in your platoons fingers while in a warzone xD
Pretty stupid considering your fingers freeze well in advance of your nostrils.
marine here having a laptop bag on one shoulder not cross body then "hey marine you know that bag is not in regs" que 20 min talk about unbothered bags
Had a full bird colonel desk jockey harass me for several weeks because the field kitchen ran out of ketchup packets near the end of a training cycle. He spent like 10 minutes screaming at the cooks before I told him that they couldn't magically pull some ketchup out of thin air for him and to suck it up and move on so other soldiers could get fed. Jackass held up a hundred+ hungry soldiers from getting hot chow for nearly 30 minutes screaming at us about it. Once we were back on base the guy made it his personal mission to seek me out and ruin my day, every day. It was infuriating at the time but I still laugh about it all these years later.
SMG to me... "Give me one good reason you're walking on my grass, soldier".
Me to SMG... "If God didn't want grass walked on, he'd have put it on clouds, and even then it would be an option for Airborne". [Points to jump wings while looking at his wingless blouse]
I actually got away with this... I think he was in shock.
They're was a kid in BCT who got stung by a bee and a drill heard him scream saying "I just got stung by a bee!" Do the drill asks him if he was allergic, so the kids replies "I don't know" So drill tells him "Well, we're going to find out! Now, get down and get some f***ing real estate!"
SMG: No formations at all in the Battalion. If I see a group of larger than 6 I will hand out article 15s like candy on halloween.
(SMG 3 days later)
SMG: 100% BN Formation, we are missing a soldier and we need to find him.
I got out right when covid was getting bad. We had the same rule said by our SgtMaj. He would blast Marines who were walking together and were not 6 feet apart. Same sgtmaj called minimum company level formations on a daily basis, and battalion level formations every libo brief. Seeing an entire battalion ad double arm intervals was the most ridiculous shit I have ever seen.
Sidenote: this is when they ordered us to cut up skivy shirts and make our own masks instead of buying actual masks. It boggles the mind
Had to wear eyepro and gloves at all times in the field, including in the aid station, chow tent, and any other tent we went into. CSM said it was for the safety and protection of blah blah blah, I don't remember. Personally Engineers, especially the sapper type, shouldn't talk much about safety when their main purpose is to hope one of them gets to the breach without dying, and gloves and eyepro aint gonna help with that
Zach from mikeburnfire had a story about fort Polk where depending on which senior NCO he was reporting to he had to bring in a different beret for different grooming standards between the two.
And now they've upgraded from 1 armorer to no armorer
French National Guard here. I got lectured by an Adjudant chef (equal to a first sergeant or sergeant major) over the color of the bandage on my recently injured arms.
Now THAT sounds like it would happen in every single military in the world. Or he just hated! the color palette. How damn dare you wear that color with your uniform???
Apparently stupidity isn't just an American thing, it's universal
@@thesneakymemedealer
Who would've thought America was just as human as the rest of the world?
SGM is angry at me because I am not present for room inspection, well maybe that is because I was still on duty on the other side of the base.
My unit would call terminal specialists Specialist Major of the Army 🤣🤣🤣
heheh Command Sgt Specialist.
All SPCs are full bird privates
Lance Commandant life /x\
Flashback to me, a freshly pinned SGT at Fort Hood, marching my squad back to the battery. It was after post PT hours because my battalion had to be extra hooah and do PT 15 minutes longer than anyone else, and as we are marching down the sidewalk and a SGM comes jogging up to us heading the opposite direction. I give a simple “good morning, SGM.”, to which I’m met with “why the fuck yall walking on the sidewalk?” I was at a complete loss for words, i literally turned to the squad and was like “ok...yall heard that shit too right?”
His CAC card was still slotted in his computer and he was still logged in.
Been there, done that, got the T shirt......
Wut...is that frowned upon? 😜
@@TheDude1764 f*ck yeah it is
Had a SGM screaming in my face for two hours over not having had a haircut in a few weeks. When he finally asked what I had to say to explain myself had to point out to him that five months prior I had gotten into a bit of trouble lost pay for two months and for some reason that was still not getting resolved properly my pay had still not restarted. I had never seen a SGM turn purple from rage before but I will say my pay was fixed the next day.
He got more angry, because he couldn't be angry.
@@SrSpankems Don't think so the sergeant I had been going through to try to get it resolved was not only transferred to another unit but forced to re-class out of our MOS.Think he was more pissed off that my NCO's had failed me for so long under his command.
@@brishanswords4952 You should have gone to see him earlier, SGM's do not like stories like yours
@@txspyrate4446 I was a dumbass of a private that trusted command to do the right thing.
its great when the rage can be focused on the real issue and helps you out.
SGM's can get rid of shark attacks and headphones, but not uniforms on Tik Tok...
So I had a Sgt tell me and a bunch of my buddies a while back ago that his unit had just gotten back from a deployment, and a corporal had committed suicide only a few days after they had gotten home. Now everyone knows that suicide just isn’t okay, especially in the military, shit really blows. But the good ol’ SgtMaj decided that he needed to make an example of this Marine’s poor decision. So at the guys funeral a few weeks later or so, his parents and his wife present, the SgtMaj decides that he is going to publicly NJP and Posthumously demote the Marine for violating the UCMJ where it essentially says it’s illegal to commit suicide, which was somehow okay’d by the BN CO.
Not exactly the same thing, but it was the closest thing I could think of. Still a really stupid rule.
There ain't no way that fucking happened
At the dead guy's funeral? Infront of those that loved him?
Fuckin' subhuman behaviour.
Haven’t even gotten past the start ad and I already know this is gonna be good
Was it assassins creed Valhalla?
"No you guys cant wear your boonies, because I dont like them" Atleast he was honest about it....but damn!
When we first got back from Afghan I continued to wear my boonie for the next day and a half before sgtmaj caught me
I have a profile from my Iraq deployment 10 years ago, where the JB-MDL MUIC TMC wrote it as "Allowed to wear Boonie Hat anywhere, due to severe sun allergy" (I am a Ginger and burned really bad on the Dix ranges). That O-3 Doc never put a through date on the form.... 10 years later and it is *Still valid*
We’re currently the only unit not able to wear bonnies on deployment, our Senior Chief doesn’t believe they’re warranted...
When I was in Afghanistan, SGM fired my platoon sergeant midway through a mission for one of our squad leaders wearing fingerless gloves. Still the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen. Our battalion spent more time watching us with pgss for uniform violations while on patrol, than they looked for the enemy planting ied’s.
worked PGSS on a FOB. Had SGM ask if i ever saw convoy drivers smoking while on the approach drive to the FOB through IR camera.... "No, never sir, never seen it..." Those chain-smoking idiots cigarettes lit up IR like floodlights from 6 miles out
Ben Cromwell:reason my career ended do fast was"your serious Sir?!WTF!over!?oh ok sniper check Sir.
Command Master Chief had off duty sailors repeatedly go topside to sweep water off the deck of our ship... in the middle of a monsoon... in port.
“What’s with our retention rates? How come no one wants to stay?”
Yup
Not the same level of this story, but a SMSgt just cornered me a couple hours ago trying to chew me out about my sunglasses. I pulled up AFI 36-2903 (AF dress and appearance) read it to him, and kept walking. He was dumbfounded. I just laugh that a SMSgt was most worried about my sunglasses in a deployed location when we have 6-9 more important things than incorrectly telling someone they are out of regs.
Can't argue with 36-2903
Wouldn't have happened to have been SMSgt Sixta, would it? Tryin' ta hit ya with the groooooomin' standard.
Oh God, the earbud policy. I remember my little brush with that.
So back when I was still in the Army, I was an E-4 I believe at the time of this happening because I distinctly remember not giving two shits about nothing, I was stationed in Kansas, right in the middle of nowhere so we had a lot of bored nco's. Anyway, the workday was done, it was a Friday, and after the company was dismissed I headed back to the barracks and changed into my civvies and planned on going out with friends, but remembered I had left something back at the company building and walked back to get it while listening to music. I was not twenty yards away from the building when I felt someone tap me on my shoulder, and I turn and see someone who I didn't know tell me that a sergeant wanted to speak to me. The nco, who was an E-8 that I didn't know, started giving me the rigamaroll about the policy on earbuds on post, and the whole time I was thinking "How bored must you be that you have to stop someone because you don't like what they're wearing on their person?" He asked me for the name of the nco in charged of me, and being a smartass I gave him a fake name and number and went on my merry way.
Please like to read what happened next.
Well, go on then, what the hell happened next?
So were you at Fort Riley?
Let’s hear it finish the story now
I for one think he fooled you all, there is no more story. If there is good for you guys, if there's not congrats on the blue balls
Don’t leave us with blue balls man
"ur under arrest for being born" thats 2020
did you just offend still born people? HOW DARE YOU!
@@PistaZOV right how dare I attack me like a barbarian cuz 2020 doesnt know " joke" look it up animal
@@captainAlex258 tbh i cant diferentiate if you're serious or not at this point lol
@@PistaZOV forget it
I was an MP long enough to have realized that if you want to get away with a serious crime, you should commit that crime on a military installation.
I realized some of the biggest criminals on post were my fellow MPs.
“Don’t walk on the commander’s grass airman!”
“Sir, there’s no grass here, it’s gravel.”
“Well the commander don’t want you on his gravel either!”
Lmao that happened to me too but on a navy base while in the air force
That Chair dont roll on gravel. #ChairForce
@@abearbrown1594 chair force is kind of dumb these days.. well always
@@abearbrown1594 I enjoyed my time in the Air force sitting at my desk feeling that AC hit lmao you sound salty you prob had to do ruck marches at 5AM :P
Ha! In Canad its the Queen's grass!
Chaplain kinda set himself up for failure though by not having his id
Only ID he needs is the love of Jesus!
@@hagnartheviking6584 now I'm just picturing a pillar of light shining down on the chaplain when asked for his id lol
💯
I can understand how people focus in on why he was stopped, but the SGM was cleared in all of this once that Chaplain didn’t have his shit together while in civilian attire. The SGM was spot on catching him and people need to understand why it is important, especially overseas, to follow the fucking guidelines. It is the little things that save lives in security and if you can’t prove who you are, you getting hemmed up.
@@parawill7074 they really do hammer that shit into you as a young private. “Better have your ID wherever and whenever you go at all times”. Or yes you will get fucked up.
I remember them also drilling gas mask into me in basic but that didnt carry over much. Or bayonets.... Or about 45% of basic information. But yea lets harp on the id who we all know its happened to you to forget your wallet somewhere.
Here's one: don't walk around with a hot weapon. On a F o B.....
Yup....heard that a lot in Afghanistan...no joke either
Or that time we made everyone in Syria wear reflective belts on the FOB. Or that time we decided you wouldn't be issued ammo unless you were stepping outside the wire in Afghanistan. Or that time we sent people between bases with no belts for their vehicle mounted guns so we would be less scary in Iraq. It's almost like we stopped caring about fighting wars and started focusing on careers.
Our Regimental SM had so many discharges when we were in Iraq that it wasn't even funny. If a regular enlisted type would have popped off that many rounds in the clearing barrel they would have been Article 15'd to death.
@@Supervillain725 ...but on a FOB? I always walked around with a hot weapon on the FOB, because something or someone was always trying to take a shot at you. Also, are you even a real soldier if you've never done a FOB pop....
What the *fuck*?
I was on post buying groceries. A Sargent, E-5 mind you, walks behind me while I’m buying cereal. I didn’t notice him, but while I’m standing in line, I feel a tap on my shoulder. The Sargent says sternly, “you didn’t give an NCO the greeting of the day.” I reply,”good afternoon Sargent.” No only did I not have eyes in the back of my head, but I wasn’t wearing my uniform.” - The Army
I swear to Christ if you type "Sargent" one more time... It's fucking SERGEANT and you really should know that... in fact it's a little suss that you don't...
@@johnroscoe2406 Sargent is better than sarn't
@@jonathanasdell9310 lmfao yes
@@johnroscoe2406 Could be worse, the Rifles Regiment in the British Army spell it Serjeant lmao
so when i was in, our unofficial working uniform was coveralls, we needed some parts from another ship one pier over from ours, rule was we had to change into another uniform just to walk the 100ft over to the next pier, even though our coveralls had official name tapes, ranks and all that.
And people fucking wonder why so many troops get out after their first contract. The Dickheadz who wonder why morale and retention are so low are the exact reasons that they are. The living definition of a paradox.
Guys from other services would always tell me that they wished they could wear blue jeans to work, that is until I told them I could not wear my working uniform almost anywhere outside my Command on the base. Pilots and aircrew could not wear our flight jackets outside the hangers. We would have to take then off and put on peacoats to go to chow or anywhere else on the base. I suggested one time at a Captain's call that the Navy should design uniforms with velcro tabs like male strippers use in order to save time constantly changing into different uniforms just to walk 100 feet. The Captain was not amused.