IS CASUALLY DATING REALLY A BAD THING? (S2, EP7)
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- Опубліковано 21 лип 2021
- 🚨NEW EPISODE of @niceandneatthepodcast available on UA-cam and all streaming platforms‼️
We often times learn more about ourself through our experiences with others. That raises the question “Is There Any Benefit To Casual Dating?” In this episode the fellas covered the intricacies of casual dating, their experiences and where they stand on it! Communication is definitely key but what does communication in the casual space look like? 👀
Don’t forget to check out and hashtag #DemtheRules 🤣🤣🤣
👉🏾To watch our latest episode “Is There Any Benefit To Casual Dating?” and subscribe to our channel just hit the link in my bio or search ‘niceandneatthepodcast’ on UA-cam👈🏾
Drop that 🥃 enjoy!
@Duke @Omar.bolden @just.jalon
It is SO refreshing to see a podcast with black men that ACTUALLY HAVE WOMEN, love women, and love themselves. You're saving the internet. Lol
You 3 are not only hilarious, but the perspectives that’s provided is soooo valuable for us women, as well as men. Thanks for creating this podcast 💚
What Jalon is explaining about exclusive dating is 100% correct. You have to date someone exclusively before you decide to be in a relationship with them. Casual dating is dealing with different people. Exclusivity is us experiencing each other without any outside "noise", i.e other people. And a relationship is the decision of yes, I have dated you exclusively and I see that I can be with you, so let's do it. Makes perfect sense!
Agreed. He explained it perfectly
Find someone with the same perspective on “casual dating” if that’s the route you want to take.
Now we’re having to heal from all the casual dating experiences , because We’re human and have feelings.
@Tay Loso I hope she responds with her perspective but here's why I think you'd have to. If the guidelines were hazy and things were not communicated on the front in some people could be more invested than others. Also, if they think they are in a certain "place" (idk how it works for them) but then find out "they lost" to someone else that could hurt. Emotions are very delicate things and when carelessly handled you can damage them and need to heal. I would say "all" because if they are not still in the same place you originally had them then some repair might be needed.
@@TheKekester500 I agree with you both.
Ladies date other people. Men have too many definitions for dating. Make sure the man is ready for you. His actions will tell you everything you need to know. I’m dating and that’s why I have been dating multiple people. I can tell the men who are serious and those playing games. *just my 2 cents*
Exactly. They have these invisible lines of rules they never intend on even sharing. Then move on. Let's also not ignore the that a certain someone in the video has been in a relationship for a long time and no ring yet. 🤷🏽♀️
Same. And you definitely can tell how serious the person is when they have "too many definitions" of dating. Example "just hanging out, dating exclusively, situationship or we're friends."
Wheww!! It's still your responsiblity to effectively lead them out of the situation & feelings you created without stringing them along. Mad respect for that!
Think you guys should touch on this some more.
THIS is a word...
Jalon's perspective about casual dating, exclusive dating, relationship and marriage was 💯
The rule about dealing with your friends ex’s or flings is 💯, it’s to many people out here to be recycling people men or women.
I’m glad to hear men say it.. if you’re my friend, it’s out of pocket lol. 🤷🏾♀️ might not be serious enough to end a friendship but I might side-eye you for sure
Casual dating isn't bad but the unnecessary disrespecting each other is really ridiculous. Especially if you know you gone keep messing with each other or keep going back
As much as I LOVE and respect this podcast y’all make it clear it’s ok to sleep with these boyz us girls are “casually dating” and that’s dusty, in my humble opinion. We out here tryna preserve ourselves. Would of appreciated more talk about how to date people without sex being involved... which is not something that’s easy to find or navigate. I’ve only been in one relationship and honestly god forbid I ever find myself in a position where I am in bed with a man who hasn’t put a ring on it. Btw-causal and exclusive aren’t that different, you still just an option. Sisters be mindful about the advice you’re receiving if you really tryna be a woman in this devilish 21st century. Y’all addressed this concern of mine briefly but lol; if you don’t put out in this day and age the game gets more complicated, don’t give up ladies. #jesusisking
This comment is so refreshing to me😊. Stay unique and stay bold! I love it!❤️💃🏾
respectfully, shut up. lmao. Not you being a judgmental Christian and putting that hashtag at the end like a bandaid
whether or not YOU think it’s not ok doesn’t give you the right to shun grown adults choosing to be intimate with whomever they please.
“these boyz” truly don’t care as much as you think they do, lol
Respectfully you can’t expect that from these group of men when it’s clear they are or have had casual sex. They aren’t practicing that so how can they give advise about that. If your looking for that type of content you should look to Tony Gaskin.
I have to agree with Jalon there’s a difference.
Actually from my viewpoint There’s difference between:
Casual Dating
Intentional Dating or Courting
Exclusively Dating Someone
Relationship
Marriage
The rules for dating are subjective and lines are crossed numerous times because of ineffective communication. What I don’t agree with are these “new” titles that come along with dating. You should know yourself before dating and know what you want. A lot of people, use these titles to have their cake and eat it too. For Halftime: if you no longer have feelings for someone and years later your friend dates them then why should you care. Aren’t you happily married.
If my friend wants to date someone I was intimate with, they better be damn sure that person will be their everything. But If the friend only intends on casually dating someone I slept with, they out of pocket, and they will automatically drop down to being a guest at my wedding
I don’t agree either that Exclusively dating and in a relationship are one in the same . You broke it down well my brother ! Jalon !!
It’s a difference. Girlfriend is a relationship !
Fiancée is my soon to be partner !!
Wife is my life partner !
In my eyes!! 🥴
Definitely new to this podcast but happy to be here! Some really wholesome conversations and alot of gems being dropped. I have my bag to collect them and my notes to🗣️ much love, looking forward to the next episode
Casual Dating is Essential!!! Im learning this at 26! Where i'm from, women are taught differently.. it's crazy. Better Late than Never... Dope video!
The TIMING on this is so perfect wow. Keep it up Guys !!
Good stuff, at the end of the day communication, setting boundaries and voicing wants and needs from both sides is what needs to happen in order to figure out where you guys stand and where you’re going. Casual, exclusive or in a relationship.
Y’all really have such great candid conversations!
Jalons definition of exclusively dating vs relationships is perfect
how long should this "dating" phrase last? After a month or 2 I think a decision should be made . I think it's weird to date for 6 months to a year without a title.
Casual dating is a very iffy on a womans behalf. Men don't always come out in the beginning that its just that. Then r u sleeping with each woman u casual date ? Like where do the men draw the line ! If a woman do that shes labeled, nor would u be cool with that. Then theres FEELINGS women tend to catch quiccer then men. Its really complicated for most. But communication is definitely first in meeting a person and if yawl not on the same page gentlemen let it go. My first time here great topics just adding my 2 cents as I listen.
Break it down Duke 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
I luv you guy's show, and much respect for the type of men you all are.. trust when I say there're not alot of men with this type of mentality ... keep it up continue to be an example 👏
I got a lot from this. I got some expounding to do- gotta ponder upon all these thoughts and gems yall out here giving out.
💙💙💙
My new friends that I wish I could meet. Y’all have so much in common and I can learn a lot.
What a great episode, from a Woman perspective it was some serious jewels dropped here 🙏🏾
I gotta side with Jalon . I definitely feel like there’s a difference and a needed a time space between causal and couple. Awesome conversation as aways
"Renegotiate the contract" a word! I've had to do this while "casually dating" someone consistently for a year. Even in my feelings I've had to revisit to maintain clarity with this particular person while meeting new people & dating others. OMG the "convenience & routine" with lack of communication will screw you every time. Good show guys!
Another good one as usual fellas! 👍🏽
I always felt that was a rule to not mess with anybody my friends was involved with in any capacity But surprised how often that scenario happens and folks ok wit it😐
Definitely agree with jalon. There are steps. Safe to say jalon is my spirit animal. 😭 I believe being single brings a whole insight
Yeah learning a lot on the casual dating space. A lot of people have a connotation of being sexually casual. But I actually enjoy casually dating someone getting to know how they move, how they treat themselves, how they think you deserve to be treated. With that time I get attracted sexually, or I get un attached. Especially in there terms of communication. If they say one thing but act out in a completely different way, I move away from the situation. Don’t do boyfriend things and say boyfriend things getting possessive but when things get tough or start to progress it’s, I’m single it’s just casual.
I love y'all's podcast first and foremost. I actually have lived by or agreed with most of your views. You've also taught me different perspectives of certain topics. I thank you for that.
BUT lol, l disagree with the "Dem the rules" part. If I have a friend that is interested in someone I casually dated/casually had sex with, I have no problem with that. Especially if it was 3 years ago since I dated her, and I'm at my wedding (based on the example). If I'm getting married, my wife, my kids, our future, and etc is all I care about. There's no way I can care about a woman that's not mine or that I'm not in love with. If I was getting married, and my future wife told me she was upset with her friend because her friend is dating someone she casually dated 3 years ago, I would feel some type of way. "Why do you care?". Even if you do at that point, move on!. unless you want him. But if your friend says his/her casual dating ex is off limits, you should respect their wishes. If that code is broken, then I hope the relationship was worth potentially losing a friend.
Dope episode fellas!
Excellent viewpoints.
I'm screaming 🧐😂😂
Ladies that's why yall need to date multiple men! Not sleep with them! Date them have fun! And wear them "Very Loosely" ha!
GOD loves you just know that
@@musclewarlord Amen! 😊
Exclusively dating & in a relationship are very different with a similar goal
Wow this convo was very informative for me. I’m 38 and newly divorced I have no idea how to causally date.
This episode was made for me 💯
I think all the confusion on dating stages comes from people feeling entitled to others. If you meet someone that you find attractive and you like, you should spend time with them to get to know them more. That’s dating. You can do that with any amount of people until you and someone else mutually decide that y’all no longer care to see other people because y’all share mutual feelings, goals, views, etc.. then, boom. y’all choose to be in a relationship, get engaged, get married, etc.. We aren’t entitled to a commitment out of every person you find attractive and start spending time with. Get to know each other
This deep!
What does it mean when one half doesn’t like to feel like there competing while casually dating. You both agree that you casually date and one develops feelings while the other is still “playing the field” do they step in and say we should be exclusive, but then they’re variables the time you’ve known each other, how is he/she around my family, living habits,etc. What changes or what do you add in your contract you both agreed on to determine if they make the team?
That funny I’m actually casual dating right now I like you learn about you self I’m 22 I love you guys every Thursday I watched you guys 🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎
Good to hear male perspective. 😊
Don’t make dating complicated or technical.. there is no science to love. Find that one person you want to rock with! Others are getting hurt with “casual dating” you can absolutely date one person at a time.. don’t complicate it guys..and no I’m not conservatively thinking as duke will say.. just saying ..
Man you guys fall in a small percentage, wish there where a lot more men that thought like you guys….grown mature spiritual sexy mentally 👌good thing ..there’s hope
Duke speak 🗣 on
Dem the rules !!! Don’t pull up with any of my seconds at my wedding, cause you ain’t even gonna make it through the church doors. We gone handle that
Big ups to healthy conversations! I am Team Jalon on this because on a personal experience, i dealt with someone that was equally as exclusive with me as i was with them but, refused a title with me. It’s real lol. S/o to nice & neat 🥶
And another question right for the women that say “sex isn’t everything” how do you operate with them. Now obviously yes Sex isn’t 100% the relationship……BUT like Omar said it’s a 🔑point in the relationship.
This is all hilarious because we are dancing around the definition of casually dating. If you’re having sex then there’s going to be a connection that’s built automatically. Bump all this free game and nonsense, IF YOU ARE HAVING SEX then you’re participating in marriage-like acts without any commitment. At this point we are just randomly pulling definitions from our butts. If limit casually dating to non sexual relations of getting know someone then everything would make sense and you wouldn’t be an a rough depressing and painful situation. This would all make sense if you share a Christian belief.
Jalon, "BUT" negates everything. Your friendship will never be the same if your friend wants to date someone that you've been intimate with.
So do you both in the relationship have a conversation on what type of relationship you both have going (casual, intentional, exclusive, gf/bf) , or is it picked up off vibes?
You absolutely should have the conversation.
You communicate with each other.
Ion think it’s wrong cause me and my homeboys done passed the same females around at 17-22 I’m 24 now but we always have some females that’s off limits if we had some serious with them
I think if someone asks “yo is that your girl” and you say “nah, we just talk” you can’t say that’s exclusive cause you basically saying y’all working on a revolving door mindset to the person asking 😅
Very happily married but if one of my friends ever even got a guy’s number HE’S OFF LIMITS!!! But that’s just me.
VIEWS GOING UPPPPPP
Do you consider just smashing dating?
🔥🔥🔥🔥
Don't take None of them Seriously loll
Man what’s the intro song bro
Xaroc - pledge of allegiance
Is casually dating and “talking” the same thing?
#chanelgirlspodcast
#applepodcast
Let’s see Duke is a Gemini, Omar is a Sagittarius. What sign is Jalon?
Scorpio
But how he out of line if it’s casual? You didn’t care about her, it was casual. 😂
Should the woman inform the man that she casually dated your friend ?
You guys are too far away from the mic .. the volume is too low , great content though
CASUAL DATING IS A WASTE OF TIME. FOR US WHO ARE SEXUALLY ACTIVE IT’S DANGEROUS. NO MAN WANTS TO DEAL WITH A WOMAN WHOS DEALT WITH ALOTTA MEN AND THAT’S SEXUAL OR NONSEXUAL. IT’S SOME EUROCENTRIC JUNK TO ME
What if that was gonna be her husband! ya'll can't be blocking the woman from potential happiness just because you guys were friends with benefits. that's selfish:-(
Listen, lol, Duke does not see anything wrong with dating a woman his friend was intimate with. It's all over his face.
Love these videos, gives true insight on the black male perspective with full transparency. 🤎