I went to a Christian college. I met my husband at the church that sponsored that school. They almost kicked me out for asking to let a fellow student stay at my apartment during Christmas. She got pregnant and the school kicked her out of the dorm. She and her boyfriend had no where to go. So a Christian college told me to deny shelter to a young unmarried woman and her boyfriend... At Christmas. Does anyone else see the correlation to Mary and Joseph?
At my christian university (ACU) they banned dancing on campus, and the students would joke about it all the time. If someone bobbed their head or shook their hips a little, there was always a student who might say "Woah woah, that's not allowed lol." We had a funny saying: "The reason we can't have premarital sex is because it could lead to dancing."
@@melaniegroce4878 Well the school isn’t a church, so they can make whatever rules they think will make their students better Christians. I would be cautious about labeling them as the _fake_ Christians (that’s a No True Scotsman).
He's not ex gay, he's still gay, he just gave up the "gay lifestyle", he's chaste. Forever. So he lives like me, only I'm asexual and happy with it while he's miserable.
I've listened to Yuan speak before, and he still says that he is "same-sex attracted," but he's committed to celibacy and doesn't want to define himself by the "gay lifestyle," so he just doesn't use the word "gay" to describe himself.
when i still went to a super strict, conservative, christian school, i had a teacher who said the same sort of thing. she said when she was in high school she identified as bisexual but then she became christian and turned away from “that lifestyle” and was “straight”. she’s now married to a man, of course. and she told us that being queer is a choice and that you can change it because she did. like okay girl you keep lying to yourself then i hope you’re happy. the real issue with it is that her sharing that just added fuel to the fire of my friends in that class who were all (of course) extremely homophobic and believe that it is a choice. this was also during the time i had begun to realize that i’m not straight and was really struggling with coming to terms with that and finding my identity. i already felt completely shunned by my friends who i had come out to (as they directly told me i was going to hell and am living a life of sin and blah blah), and her saying that added to their ostracizing and confirming their biases. i feel so sad for queer people who live their lives like that in such deep-rooted shame and hate that they (not everyone of course but for the ones who do) in turn use that to further the homophobia within religion. it’s so both directly and indirectly harmful for people like me who are stuck in that situation and manipulation and because of the negative views it fuels, which like i said, just added to my own “friends” turning more against me. sorry for the rant, it just hit close to my heart
Given kinky people just replicate a lot of it, men controlling and hurting women but like lol tell teen girls no man will want them first and its totes fine
The biggest thing I took away from going to Christian college was how desperate they were to treat us like children. Heavily monitored, but also encouraged to get married asap. Totally bizarre.
Some yes and some no. I am not saying that is not your experience because some are like that but not all. I do not think many of the above rules are treating students like kids. I do not agree with all. Being so scared of any opposite sex interaction is not good.
When I was a senior in high school, my parents' friends naturally assumed I would be attending a Christian college. I was concerned about over-the-top rules and attesting to a faith I had already walked away from. It sounds like my concerns were spot-on.
“Getting married at 21 is a nice middle of the road age” and “25 is kind of late to be getting married.” LOL! That makes me feel like my wedding, when I was 28, was a “geriatric” marriage. 🤣
21 seems to me like the youngest possible age at which a person could reasonably be married. 25 seems a little younger than ideal, but not too much so. I'm 32 and have never been married and don't expect to.
It's exactly like authoritarian middle school. I'd you're lucky you'll find one or two teachers who encourage you to step outside the Christian bubble and engage with other ideas. If you're unlucky, you never learn critical thinking or how to love yourself.
@@carlpeterson8182 required in what way? Most classes do have an attendance policy but that's not in opposition to learning to be an adult... you can freely be irresponsible and be dropped or fail your classes. That's not helicoptering in the same way these rules are describing. That's just regular learning to fail or succeed by your own merit.
After graduating from high school I took a gap year as an exchange student and was put into an all boys Christian school in a very religious country. I have been an atheist for my entire life so this was a big change for me. Two moments stand out to me from my time there. First, my history teacher once asked my class to raise our hands if we were not Christian, and I was one of two people who raised our hands. She then had both of us explain our beliefs for the class. I was terrified that I was in trouble cause corporal punishment was a thing there, but that teacher loved to ask her class somewhat invasive questions and she was just genuinely curious. A little later in the school year one of our teachers came out as gay and it was a huge scandal, like front page news scandal, and he had to resign. The same history teacher from before asked our class what we thought of homosexuality and this time I was the only one who thought there was nothing wrong with it and who actively supported the teacher who had resigned. Got a lot of weird looks from the class but otherwise didn't face much backlash. Some other teachers in the school were physically reprimanding students who were pro LGBT but my history teacher was pretty chill and I probably got a pass from the others cause I was international. Both were very uncomfortable situations but helped me get better at voicing my own opinions, even when in the minority.
My ex went to a Christian college like this. Hours for genders in dorm halls, required chapel, and lots of homophobia! It is so damaging and also infantilizing to be treated like that! Glad you both made it out together, and keep up the great content! 💙
I think part of the reason we love having Drew on the channel is you two are so adorable together. Love your dynamic when you're chatting together and how he looks at you when you're talking.
I toured a colleg that had the chapel requirement. After being told about it my twin and I immediately started brainstorming ways out of it. When we started discussing them on the car ride home my parents laughed and just told us we didn't have to apply. I'm glad my parents didn't force the religious college thing. They would have been excited if I chose a Catholic school. But, I was so done with the church at that point.
I will say that my experience at this exact school was less than rosy, but my real grief comes from a student who got deported with his pregnant wife because of the school. They were both kicked out for having premarital relations and it derailed their entire life. While I have plenty of trauma and some legitimate PTSD from certain experiences with professors on power trips, nothing I experienced compared to what happened to them. To give a school the power to ruin lives over these rules is truly mind boggling. And just a few years later a guy only received a brief suspension for threatening his girlfriend with a gun while on campus, with witnesses. There can be good in a small university experience and even good at this school, but there are a lot of more complex questions to ask about treating adults like small children (the no drinking for anyone even over breaks at home with family still stands) and welding enough power to essentially derail entire lives for petty things like "I don't think you should be allowed to express your sexuality" The school also fired a staff member for being gay in a really dramatic manner. I hope that others have been harmed less by going there, but so much of it looking back was just indoctrination and getting us to go along with it to earn enough points to be worthy of a god we were told could never actually love us.
Wow, I'm sorry to hear about the students who were deported for having premarital sex. That's awful. I hadn't heard of that happening, but it's not surprising. I had a friend who became pregnant, and the school was going to require them to attend daily counseling in order to keep attending. They didn't want to do that (I don't blame them), and transferred to another school. I also heard about the staff member who was fired for being gay. That's truly, truly awful.
It really fascinates me how little they trust their students. You have this supposed crop of wonderful pious kids... and you have to mandate chapel, mandate sexual purity through all these rules, and so on
Funny chapel story. Our school also used chapel for school announcements. One time after a very dramatic lesson about humility and not giving in to pride, our student government came up to announce that our football team made it into division 1. They brought in the cheerleaders and played some epic music, and introduced a new logo. No one was sure if they were serious because it contrasted so much with the lesson, so we all left chapel super confused lol.
OMG, this brings back the awful memories from the early 80's when I had to go Bob Jones University for 1 1/2 years. I finally begged my parents to let me come home and it was the best decision for me. I ended up graduating from Eastern Mennonite University and loved it!
I went to college at Lander in Greenwood, SC and the horror stories about Bob Jones we heard. Oh gosh. Chilling. I once borrowed some good books from there for a religion paper using interlibrary loan though lol
Growing up evangelical, i went to youth camps, and they had alotnof these same rules, we had to be 6 feet apart from girls, our bags were checked and searched for "worldly" items. We had to attend chapel 3 times a day, we had devotionals in between. Very heavily regulated. I remember when we had pool time, the guys went at a certain time, and the girls went at another time.
Same for my church camp, except at mine they also banned the basketball court when the opposite gender was swimming, because you could oversee the pool from the basketball court.
7:12 in middle school, there was a former escort that came to a Wednesday night youth group service.🤯 I don’t remember a lot about the conversation. As an adult looking back, it was completely inappropriate. But I do remember she told us how to jump out of a moving car safely because she had to do it a couple times….
Wow! I am 99% sure I went to that same school from 2013-2015. Those rules brought back a lot of forgotten memories. As a music student I remember the piano practice rooms in The Maddox Center were a popular spot for couples to be alone. My dorm room overlooked the chapel lawn so my roommate and I would look for couples doing the “walk” and predict if they would end up getting married or not. One of the random things I remember is a guy getting kicked out of school because he was growing weed in Pringle cans.
OMG, I _love_ the thought of randy students actually _reserving scheduled time_ in any available room with the potential for a little bit of co-ed privacy.
The first time I had sleep paralysis I woke up and it was like the girl from the ring on top of me scratching me except I couldn’t feel the scratches. I was in 7th grade. I closed my eyes and prayed and it eventually stopped so for years I was so convinced I had demons torturing me at night and I didn’t tell anyone. It was so scary. Eventually in high school I googled stuff that made me realize I wasn’t possessed. Phew what a relief.
I've had sleep paralysis from time to time over the years, but most of the time I didn't experience the presence of some kind of being, which I've been told is common with sleep paralysis. A few times I felt like there was an evil, non-corporeal presence that I couldn't see, which overtime I took to calling the Malignant Entity. At some point I realized that I unconsciously based that phrase off the Crystalline Entity from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
I attended Bethel University (back when it was a college). One of the rules we agreed to in order to attend was no dancing. Several students from the student government danced to “Wild Thing” at a public outdoor concert on campus. They were required to make public apologies in the school newspaper. Which was then posted on bulletin boards around campus. Public shaming anyone? Additional rules: no drinking alcohol, no illicit drug use, no smoking, no premarital sex, no pornography, no gambling (I avoided playing cards of any kind on campus). And of course you had to profess to be a Christian to go there.
Sounds about the same as my school. Also, there was only a single "co-ed" dorm, but only the lobby was shared; the building had a boys half and a girls half.
I went to a different Christian school and it also had the no dancing rule. While I was there, the original movie Footloose came out in theaters. Practically the entire dormitory population showed up at the movie on premiere night.
"no drinking alcohol, no illicit drug use, no smoking, no premarital sex, no pornography, no gambling (I avoided playing cards of any kind on campus). And of course you had to profess to be a Christian to go there" and? Let me guess a western godless and souless idiot who wants commit the shittest things, because she is so stupid to give her life away, for stupid modern things? You are really lost western godless idiot and who said the opposite is an hipocrite.
As a side note, I cannot tell you how amazing it is that you guys talked about fucking chapel man... I have wanted to cathartically get over this crap for most of my adult life, and this video helped me do that. Thank you!
The anecdote about Drew's lady friend caught my attention, as I had assumed highly religious people basically didn't believe in opposite gender friendships (that they'd think it inevitably leads to something else because surely that's the only type of connection men and women can have). I'm curious, were opposite gender friendships common in that school/community? Or was Drew an outlier for being friends with a woman?
When I was in Evangelical circles as a teen/young adult it was common to be friends with the opposite sex as long as you were never alone together. It was even encouraged to a point so that girls could find a suitable husband from within the religion.
I went to this school. It's not unheard of for there to be platonic friendships between people of different genders. What is more unheard of is those friendships always being platonic and not getting messy. I thought I had several guy friends and found out eventually that I did not, I had been girlfriend zoned by most of them instead and it sucked.
@@ihartwinxclub oof, that's so true. The girlfriend zone is a really unnerving place to be. I seemed to unintentionally convince a young gentleman I wanted to court and then marry because we danced at a wedding, messaged on Facebook occasionally about nerd stuff, and I sat next to him during College group often. I didn't realize we'd been on group dates until our other friends told me. I genuinely thought it was just a group of messy kids too entangled in each other's lives hanging out at the movies or bowling or whatever. Then by our second solo date he was talking about how many kids he wanted in the next 5 years after getting married. And when he mentioned I wouldn't have to work after grad school and could just stay at home because he makes enough, it dawned on me: he doesn't see me as a person. He sees me as a baby maker with cute silly thoughts about stuff I don't need to bother myself with. And I had to shut that down immediately, because I didn't major in history with a focus on religious dissent and philosophy in 17th century England to be a housewife. And I certainly don't want children, especially if I have to push it out my own personal vajayjay that I'm not sure I really want men to get near in the first place, so how we'd make those babies is anyone's guess. But somehow, at the end of this whole series of unfortunate fundie events, I was the bad guy. Some awful Jezebel who took advantage of a man's weaknesses for personal gain, when all I did was be nice to a person who was cool to talk to and nice to me too.
At the Christian University I attended, the running joke was "don't have sex because it leads to dancing!" And there definitely was pressure in jr/sr years to get that "ring before spring." We had a lot of the same rules as mentioned in the video. Did they give out "rape whistles" at yours, too?
Yup, I got caught breaking many weird rules. The strangest ones always revolved around not causing "our brothers to stumble". If they only knew I was not interested at all. 😁 Too much hyper focus on the body, clothes, how to wear your bag so you dont crease your breasts, sitting a certain feet from men, how to not eat seductively, and no doing nothing that gives the appearance of evil...like talking to a guy outside at 8 o dark. There's too many rules ya'll, makes my head hurt.
Fellow former student from the same Christian college here 👋 I spent a lot of my life at that college-my dad has worked there for decades, and I have fond memories of visiting him at his office, eating at the cafeteria, touring new buildings before they were opened to the public(my dad pulled all the fiber-optic cable for the chapel building, student center, etc), and feeding the ducks at the pond. I was there eventually as a student, and I loved the faculty so much and learned a lot. But the workload was a lot for me and sometimes I had to choose between studying for tests and going to chapel, or else I’d fall behind on my credits. It tore me up because I’m a rule-follower and I couldn’t scan and run, but as a commuter with a part time job I could only delegate so much time to chapel, homework, work, and sleep. with my education came new questions I asked about my faith and about myself, questions that I never, ever felt safe talking about on campus. I got to the point where I couldn’t handle school and had a mental breakdown. Took a gap year and, 3 years later, I’m still on that gap year. I deconstructed, came out as gay, and could look back at my school experience without the rose-colored glasses. Chapel was brainwashing, devotional before each class as well. It was completely and totally immersive, and even in an educational setting I felt like the hard topics were always being tiptoed around. There was a witch hunt-for lack of a better term- against the gay or affirming staff. My sibling, who was affirming and gay themselves, became pregnant and was told their job would not be available to them after they were finished with maternity leave. I loved my friends, and I loved my profs-one of my English professors inspired me to finish my first novel, and I’ll never forget what he taught me. I loved the small class settings and felt like I learned a lot. But the good just doesn’t outweigh the bad for me. As a gay, affirming, deconstructed, pro choice person, there is absolutely no room for me there if I decided to go back, regardless of how much I value what I learned from my professors and the class material. I loved that college, but looking back at it now, I realize that that college didn’t love me back.
I'm so intrigued. The ducks at the pond and some of the things they've said really sound like where my god mother works and my god sister graduated from. I mean. The egg farmers. That's really specific to be different colleges, especially considering these two and I are the same age.
Man, your last sentence sounds like how I feel about my current college. I love the faculty, the curriculum, the clubs, my job, and my friends. The admin does not love us back.
I went to two religious based "rehabs" and a woman there had a similar story who came to speak about being a lesbian and I asked her the same question if she was attracted now to men.... and she had the same answer. my heart just breaks ):
Uploaded 22 seconds ago. Let's do this! Okay so I've finished watching now. That was incredibly insightful. I knew that Christian collages would be heavily controlled, but I didn't realise just how OTT it was. Hand checks? Chapel and devotionals in every class? Thanks to the egg farmer? Damn... Great video. I learned a lot, and it was very fun.
Really enjoy the collabs with both of you contributing as well as your solo (scripted or otherwise) work. Went to a State Uni where it was the complete opposite. Free for all in most respects. I think a solid middle ground would be helpful concerning structure and whatnot. Thanks for the vid. 🙂
This brings back memories. First, most of my classmates who met and married are now divorced. I know only one couple that made it. Secondly, it was a point of honor and pride to violate every rule before graduation. I proudly say that I did so. The rules were so extreme that I am almost embarrassed to discuss them. During my senior year, they hired a rigid dean that made up a new rule. A couple couldn’t date alone in a car. You had to have either another couple or a chaperone. Yep, we single dated all though high school but weren’t allowed to in our senior year. Thankfully, they dropped the rule halfway though the year. It was unworkable. I broke that rule the first week it was imposed.
I always wonder how these places have coped with students having ubiquitous access to the internet, so they can easily break free from the authoritarian cult-like behavior. If I was my parents' age I could imagine buying into it through being sheltered from the world outside the Christian college bubble, but it's now so easy to just pull out my phone and find info that easily pops that bubble
Back when I was a Christian I was always on my phone or playing in play books in the pews. It wasn't because I was trying to be disrespectful but instead I just couldn't focus. If I had nothing to do for a whole sermon but sit and listen then I would either fall asleep or become super depressed from the lack of stimulation. I always felt bad for my Mom cause people would always look down at her and judge her for letting me play stuff and listen at the same time. She could quiz me after and find that I was in fact listening and got all the info. Thankfully my Mom didn't care about what the others thought of me. Came to find out years later that I have ADHD.
Did we go to the same college? It was so strange to go to a private school for the first time in college. More rules than I’d had in my entire life yet first time being an adult. I was like is this legal? Lol… I would hide my headphones during chapel. I lasted a few semesters before I dropped out- would not do that for 4 years.
I was born in raised in the town that harbored your university. It was a great place to grow up, and I even attended the church of your college. I have heard so many horror stories from friends that went, that I'm blown away they are still open. Love the video!
I went to SBU which, at the time, had Roy Blunt as the President of the school. Yes, THAT Roy Blunt. While i really liked most of my professors, I was so upset when I found out that the school taught that women who were in abusive marriages had to stay with their husbands. There was NO reason for divorce. And purity culture was not just a thing, it was pushed and pushed and pushed. The joke was that our school was called Southwest Bridal University for the number of marriages that occurred. If I had to do it again, there is no way in hell I would ever go there.
I live in the area and have lots of old classmates and extended family members who went there. I'm so glad that I came to the realization that Christianity isn't for me before I graduated high school. Religious universities weren't even on my radar, and I can only imagine how much I would hate attending one
So I had elected to go to a different Christian college, girls curfew was 12 and boys was 2:00 a.m. you could get an extension to 1:00 a.m. as a female if your parents gave permission. Well I was 18 and had been living on my own for a year and told my ra if she called my mom that was at her own risk. She calls my mom and she said why are you calling me about an adult who is paying for their own tuition please do not call here again. I got my extension but now I realize wait why did we have a different curfew LOL
My partner and I had very similar experiences and stories from our evangelical undergrad in Ohio. There was also a strict no-drinking law, even when at home with family when you were of age, but by senior year I would skip chapel to buy beer because I knew no one would be at the grocery store.
@@AnnaReneeCedarville was associated with The Church I grew up in. I could deal with the rules of Cedarville Today because I no longer would have to wear skirts to class. The rules in the 90s were too rigid for my liking.
This made me cry a little bit when you guys talked about getting in trouble for sitting “too close”. Like I also hated getting in trouble and as a Christian it was like anything you did was a direct slap in the face to God even when it wasn’t a big deal or a problem. I spent a lot of time trying to avoid anything like that for fear of being shamed and embarrassed. I’m so happy to be free from that life. So glad I didn’t have to deal with all that in college. I’m so glad you guys had each other and still have a great college experience.
The bonus rule of No Dancing just blew my mind! Your college was Dirty Dancing before Kevin Bacon showed up!! Did you know anyone that would get in trouble often for dancing or kicked out of the school because they’d dance a lot?
I attended a Christian college, too, and I found this quite fascinating. In some ways my school was a lot more strict than yours, and in others it sounds like the opposite. Overall this was really relatable, though. Your conclusions about how patronizing all the rules were really resonate with me. Thanks for sharing!
It’s probably not as astronomical a coincidence as it seems, but my mind is being blown a little bit from stumbling across the UA-cam channels of both sides of a couple within a span of months, by total accident. I remember watching a couple Genetically Modified Skeptic videos in the past, and I’ve started watching Antibot just within the last few days, only to discover he’s her husband! In the endless ocean of UA-cam creators, what are the odds of that?
I was almost forced to go to a Catholic college. Catholics get a bad rap, but they are WAY less strict than evangelicals. The only major rules were you had to attend mass once a week and that boys and girls had to leave each other's dorms by 10pm. It was still too strict for me. But I didn't find it unreasonable.
At my Christian college, it was called "Slide and Glide" when people would swipe their card and try to walk away. We also had a yearly tradition at our college called "sexual wholeness week," which would always be the most uncomfortable/awkward/also titulating week of personal testimonies. 😆 "Ex gay" stuff was lumped into that week. I think it was the theme one year. We also had rules regarding dorm floor hours where if someone of the opposite sex was visiting and we were sitting together on a couch or bed, everyone's feet had to be touching the ground. The RA would patrol the floor to make sure all feet were on the ground.
That last paragraph reminds me of a teen academic camp I used to go to. It wasn't Christian, but we were minors and they obviously didn't want anyone going home pregnant, so in this case the rule was actually reasonable. Door open, lights on, all persons clearly visible from the door, and feet on the floor. We always laughed about the feet on the floor bit, but I laugh even harder now thinking about some of the things I have done as an adult with my feet on the floor...
I currently go to a Christian college and I can't wait to get out of here. we have a 12am curfew, no drinking, no smoking, no sex, no 'homosexual activity', you can't have someone of the opposite sex in your apartment unless there's another person there, and they absolutely cannot go in the bedrooms or bathrooms. no shorts or capris on campus, no piercings (except one lobe piercing for girls), no tattoos, no 'unnaturally' colored hair, you must go to church regularly, no swearing, and so much more. God I can't wait to graduate. I'm really glad I have friends who are married so they live in community housing rather than approved student housing (where all single students are required to live), so we can get away with a lot of shit lmao.
My wife and I met at a Christian college as well ( in Canada) . We were required to attend daily chapel too and were allowed to miss only a certain amount. They used to have a student standing at each door with a clipboard to record who was attending ( or who wasn't). I remember confronting the registrar over this and how it violated their precious belief in Liberty of Conscience. We both eventually left the school and now decades later have also left the faith. They had some strange speakers as well, I recall.
I HATED chapel most of the time, but we also had some very insightful speakers who actually changed my views. I think those talks definitely contributed to my eventual deconstruction
I went to Pensacola Christian College haha I've been wanting to do a video on it. I almost got kicked out so many times, and I went to Christian schools my whole life and was a ifdb pastors kid. I was the chaplain and was even a youth minister...but the college sent back a letter to my parents talking about me being a wolf in sheep's clothes
The two of you have a great dynamic in your videos together. But I'd love to hear more from you alone 😊 loved your video about being a missionary kid. I understand it was difficult for you to make, but those personal videos make an impact if you're comfortable with making them. You seem like such a strong woman, it's an inspiration 😊
I went to Moody Bible Institute and met Christopher Yuan, he does conversion therapy for students. I also got a lot of these talks which greatly influenced me as I was realizing I was queer. Id love to discuss this with you!
My Christian high school did hand check as well as we had a ‘PDA Bible’ and if you were sitting too close to the opposite sex then the teacher would come over and make a scene about putting a very thick Bible between you and the other person. 😂😣
I went to a different Christian school than the one you're describing, but a lot of the rules were similar. We had chapel three times a week, and if you missed chapel, there were various consequences. Church attendance was also required, both morning and evening service on Sunday. Classes opened in prayer, but didn't have devotionals. Signing the (very detailed) statement of faith was absolutely required, and your admissions essay was your Christian testimony. Open dorms happened like one night per semester, so for a lot of students that was a chance to go tour the dorms and see how the other half lived. I remember my roommates looking for strategies to lure girls to want to hang out in our room for a while. Students had to sign an agreement not to dance or drink alcohol, even during summer break. One economics prof told me that nearly everyone in the administration disagreed with the no dancing rule, but there was one very old lady on the board who would be horribly scandalized if that rule were changed, so they were basically just going to wait to change it until she died. That was about 20 years ago now, so I'm curious whether that change ever happened. The weirdest unofficial rule was that student organizations were almost completely disallowed. During freshman orientation week, I asked if there was a chess club, and was told "we don't really do clubs here," in a tone that suggested I should have known better than to ask about something so worldly. But there was a rugby club that got started up my senior year, and that was fine. The theater "department" was essentially a club, and was run by a volunteer director and put on a play each semester on no budget. But that got shut down by the administration, with no official explanation. The shutdown happened during winter break, when all the actors who were going to be in Hamlet the next semester were memorizing their lines. Everyone found out when they got back on campus that the theater program no longer existed. I wasn't involved in that, but I had friends who were. We heard at least four unofficial explanations for what happened: 1) The president of the college supposedly disapproved of theater. This didn't make much sense, given that he'd attended some of the plays and seemed to like them, but for a lot of students if you said that he liked or disliked something, that was almost a command from God. 2) Hamlet contained themes and scenes that were inappropriate for a Christian school. If so, then the prof who taught the Shakespeare class that I took didn't get the memo. 3) The theater program was growing rapidly in popularity, and Hamlet was a very popular play and would cause this growth in popularity to accelerate. But, the administration hadn't worked out what their philosophy of theater was, and they really couldn't allow this thing to continue existing when they didn't have that worked out. So, they were going to develop a philosophy of theater, and once that was done, the program could resume. I heard that it did get started up again a few years later, so maybe this one was accurate. I don't know if they developed an official philosophy of theater or not. 4) Some people in the administration hated the volunteer director, and shutting down the program was the easiest way to get rid of her. This was definitely true, but almost certainly not the official reason the decision was made, however much it may have contributed. The whole thing was very weird even at the time, but is weirder looking back on it.
I am so interested in the story behind your change from Christianity to Atheism. I grew up Conservative Christian and now that I am in my 30s, I am questioning a lot. Would you consider making such a video? A lot of your videos really resonate with me.
What really resonated with me was discussions using reason and logic. The earlier years of the Atheist Experience was a wonderful awakening for me. I actually believed morals came from the Bible. After watching TAE I discovered our morals are NOT based on the Bible at all.
We had similar rules. We had chapel twice a week, (twice a year we had Revival week with eight chapels but only 3 of the 8 were mandatory). We had some outstanding speakers and some really dull ones. We also had open dorm policies. In the dorms it was twice a week, in the apartments it was 5 days a week. The rule didn’t start to bother me till like senior year. Some Professors did devotionals but it wasn’t a rule. I think my Intro to Sociology, Geology Gen Ed, and Math Gen Ed all did. The school I attended is part of a denomination that also doesn’t support drinking for it’s members (clergy cannot at all) and so the school didn’t allow drinking. While you could be kicked out of school, I actually told our university chaplain that I drink during my senior year because I was close to him and he said “If you’re smart enough to drink safe and not get caught, you’re smart enough to drink. The rule is truly to prevent illegal drinking and dumb drinking.” We did not have any of those bonus rules at the end.
I love all of your videos, but there is a special energy that comes from all the videos with you and Drew together. It's cool to see and it feels like I'm with friends. It feels like my husband and I are talking about my deconversion from Christianity. Thanks for this video. It was great.
I worked at a mega church for a couple of years that actually had very similar rules in our employment contract you had to be at church every week, you had to be in a small group, volunteer in at least one big church event a year, couldn't drink period even inside your own home, can't engage in "homosexual sin", if they found out that you had pre martial sex you could get fired I was 19 and I firmly indoctrinated so I didn't see anything wrong with it but in hindsight YIKES that job is actually what made me eventually leave the church
My college roommate attended Eton, which is a posh upper class boys private school in the UK. There was mandatory chapel when he was there. Eton is ostensibly secular
@@elizabethmcintosh6722 Aren't the publicly funded schools in the UK all basically C of E? America doesn't have an official religion but England does, and England doesn't have the separation of church and state, yet the US is so much more militantly Christian.
18:00 >"no alcohol, even if you're 21. They take this super-serious" lol. This is like the 100% opposite of uni in Australia- One of the main rituals at uni is "O-Week" (Orientation week) the first week of each year, nominally to teach new students where stuff is, do "ice-breaker" activites, etc... but mostly it's just free beer, almost 24/7, for the whole week. Drinking-age is 18 here, and MOST first-year uni students are 18, but 17yo first-year students aren't that rare, and no-one stops them drinking. Hell, it's pretty common for local high-schoolers to """sneak""" on campus (ie, they WALK on campus, but very dishonestly fail to wear "I'M UNDERAGE, PLZ PREVENT ME FROM DRINKING" t-shirts), to take advantage of o-week. And that's just one of several events each year when it's standard for all unis to put on free beer. Basically anything that requires you put a desk outdoors, or where there'll be students gathering not in a lecture-hall, it'll PROBABLY have free beer... (kind of exagerating... but not by much...)
I'm glad I decided to go to a secular school because I thought being challenged would "strengthen my faith" lol Also Christian schools were just much more expensive
All of this sounds so similar to my experiences in college though I know I definitely went to a different school than you because we had chapel EVERY DAY with only 15 skips allowed per semester
We had chapel Monday through Friday. You got 18 skips a semester. One guy I knew supposedly overskipped on purpose to get kicked out. Though it is possible it was something more serious and he just said that. Some people never admitted to what their discipline was about. One guy had to move out of the dorm to live with an older married couple off campus I suppose to be supervised. Never knew why, even though I knew him fairly well.
I only took a campus tour and didn't end up attending, and I don't think this is the school you went to, but so much of this made me think of what I saw at Oral Roberts University. Their motto was "to the uttermost bounds of the earth" because their main objective was not necessarily education, but sending witnesses out to every corner. That student who sailed out to the remote island and was killed by North Sentinel islanders attended ORU, and I was not surprised in the least to hear that when the news broke. I also toured other schools near me like Evangel University and Sterling College. This stuff could have applied to any of them, and looking back, I'm so glad I didn't spend 3x more money on them over my local public university. The immense amount of monitoring doesn't make any sense to me if you want students to truly follow and love God. Wouldn't he know the difference between someone whose heart is in the right place and really wanted to serve him vs. just following the rules to avoid getting kicked out? Another thing that really struck me at ORU was a 10,000-step-per-day requirement. Upon enrollment, you received a fitness tracker from the school. It was GRADED and I think it went on your transcript each semester you were there as some sort of Physical Education. Of course, for an able-bodied person, it would not have been hard to hit that number with how deliberately far apart the buildings seemed to be built on the campus. But you couldn't take days off unless you wanted your grade to go down. I asked someone on my tour what happened over the holidays if you went home to see your family, and they said you still had to walk. My mom who came with me on the ORU tour is wheelchair-bound. I cannot begin to tell you how difficult it was to get her across campus and inside all these tall buildings with steps in front and ramps somewhere in the back. Sometimes we missed half of an event scheduled on the tour just looking for a working elevator which was hidden in some broom closet only accessible to the janitor, who couldn't be found. We stayed overnight and my parents sat in their hotel room the whole second day to avoid a repeat of the navigation disaster. I had multiple ankle surgeries in high school and was already scared of what would happen to me if I needed another one in my years there and couldn't get to my classes or "hit my steps." On top of the blaring ableist vibes and inaccessibility, I was laughed at by a director of a music department I met with for saying that I aspired to one day be like a famous worship leader. Needless to say, none of the experience made me feel welcomed or encouraged to attend. And this was only in 2016, I should add, not the Stone Age (well, it sure felt like the Stone Age at ORU).
Bible school I attended had students to agree to underwear checks no pants and bras mandatory and not distracting. The Dean was fired for having a affair with a student later rehired same school Rodney Howard browne attended and lectured at. Good thing they never checked my panties or assumed I might be wearing a inappropriate pair.....
@Richdragon banned bras that were distracting under wire was pushing the line lace that could be seen likewise..... Not wearing a bra would get you sent home. So by extension any blouse or dress could not be see through at all
Underwear checks. Wow. I guess it's technically legal because you technically agreed to it, but any normal human would recognize that you were only agreeing under pressure, and that. Was. Not. OK. Good lord.
I never comment on anything, but I just had to after watching this video. I went to the same school, so this video brought back a lot of memories. It’s funny how certain rules and ways of doing things felt okay at the time, but looking back, they feel far from okay. I’m thankful for meeting my husband there as well as some friends, but a part of me regrets going there. One of my worst experiences was a RD (& their faculty spouse) that were such bullies. They gaslit me (my favorite experience was when they accused me of threatening them 🙃) before I even knew what that was. Don’t even get me started on the blatant misogyny…I’m still processing the damages of that and the effects of purity and modesty culture that were part of the culture on campus.
I was raised in a very very bizarre church that was actually kicked out of the baptists club. The 'regular' day school required seniors to do full school work and then also do a bible college course on top of that at the church's bible college. There was a meeting where a student stood up and decented against it and we never saw her again after that.
wow, these rules are bonkers. I was sent to a christian high school for 2 years and going to mandatory chapel once a week was already awful. (tbh I skipped it half the time. I got caught once and got in BIG trouble) I can't imagine three times a week, plus church. but for a university to control so many aspects of (mostly) legal adults lives is really weird and invasive
the no dancing rule to me is wild. I never went to a religious educational institute, but I was heavily involved in christian unions and societies all throughout university. The main "wholesome fun" that we could do was a ceilidh (a traditional scottish dance a bit like a barn dance or square dance). Since this was the most wild thing you could do without being judged, I went to a *lot* of ceilidhs in my formative years!
Some Christian denominations viewed dancing as something that "worldly" people did, so it became forbidden. You see it with some of the more fundamentalist churches. I attended a Church of Christ high school for a couple of years and dancing is a hard no for that church. It might lead to sex, after all. Most of the students and a lot of the teachers thought it was an absurd restriction but the older people who were in charge were pretty set on it.
I'm new to your channel and had no idea that you're a pilot! In high school I wanted to be a commercial pilot, but I decided to pursue art and design as a career instead
I'm pretty sure I know which college you are referring to, and my Christian middle school was kind of a feeder school into it. They would visit and give material to the 8th graders about the college, to get their foot in the door before the kids went off to public high school. I actually considered going there later when I was looking at colleges, but I was already in a relationship with my husband and I was worried that it wouldn't survive that environment. My relationship with my husband was always more important to me than my relationship with "God," even though I would never have admitted it.
I worked at a 24H Starbucks here in Chicago and we had soooo many Moody Bible students on both sides of the counter. It was an experience, especially because I was like 23-24 and many of the people we worked with were gay.
Dunking you in a pond when you’re going to get married. In a town near us (Gosport Indiana) we had a spring tank they called the “Chivery” tank. We were told that several generations ago a fellows friends would haul him off and dunk him there a few days before the wedding but no one had done this for years.
The dorm visits are reminiscent of the rules when I attended a state university in the 80's. We had specified hours, the door had to be open, and both people had to have at least one foot on the floor.
I had a very similar Christian college experience with almost identical rules about co-mingling in dorms, hangups about dancing, etc (Drew is right, it had to do with the crossing of legs)! Of course we were a totally dry campus and our statement of faith included a pledge abstaining from all forms of alcohol... HOWEVER my college also had a semester abroad program in a country where drinking wine was simply part of the culture. Students were regularly served it in their host homes by locals who were also Christians, but did not have the same hangups about alcohol. The college program director quietly let the prohibition slide, and he made up his own unofficial drinking rules, which were basically: 1) you can only drink wine, not spirits 2) you can only drink wine if served to you in the privacy of a family home, and it would be considered rude to refuse 3) you cannot drink to excess (one glass is enough) 4) you may not purchase wine or spirits in any store or restaurant. Of course students did not always follow these rules and did drink spirits to excess that they bought at stores, on occasion, but for the most part, students were responsible. The situation went largely unnoticed by the rest of the school for a few years, but eventually, word of this debauched spring break, glass-o-wine drinking behavior got the attention of the most prudeiest members of the school, who had a total meltdown. It was a full on scandal with people petitioning and demanding the resignation of the program director. He barely kept his job, but of course students were no longer allowed to have wine, even if 21 (of course 18 was the drinking age in the host country). Even then, I thought the whole thing was ridiculous.
The Christian University I went to also had Chapel. We were required a certain number of hours each semester. You could attend the 'hour' of chapel three times a week, you could get an hour from the Friday Night chapel and you could get up to four hours from the Day of Service/Day of Prayer (One each semester). We had 3 Dorm Buildings plus Married Student Housing. The oldest of the three buildings was co-ed and you had to be in 2 year or above to live there... they closed it down between my 1st and 2nd years. So then all of the underclassmen were in the segregated dorms. We had some 'open dorm time', but it was scheduled, and if you did not belong in that dorm, you had to be let in by someone else. We didn't have devotionals, but we did start class with prayer most of the time. On the other hand, we had Student Ministries... 25 hours minimum a term working with a church and 8 one-hour meetings with a mentor. Also had a Dry Campus, even if you were over-age. There was a declaration of faith that I had to sign, and I think I had to write down a good part of my theology as well. We had to be careful about co-ed dancing... if you were too close, then you could get scolded
I went to a bible college which was exclusively for learning about the bible/becoming pastors, missionaries, etc. It was all this and more. So even on top of ALL of our classes being bible focused, we were required to go to chapel every weekday on top of church every Sunday. Oh and we were all assigned to Care Groups that met every other week, and we were all encouraged to have someone in a year ahead of us 'disciple' us. We also had separate dorms, but our open dorms only happened like twice a year for a few hours. And at the beginning of every year, the girls had this 'fashion show' where they'd display all of the the rules for modesty so we didn't cause our brothers in christ to 'stumble' 😑 We also had a curfew, wwre watched carefully when it came to even potential male-female relationships (as in, the staff would literally discuss who was spending time with who in staff meetings 🙁. We were also required to participate in spiritual emphasis weeks (because apparently daily bible classes and chapels, plus church and care groups wasn't enough spiritual emphasis), missions week, and camp week. Oh and besides no alcohol, allowed piercings were very limited, and no tattoos were allowed. Man as I list all of this, it just strikes me as way more odd than I used to think this was all no big deal. Twist ending - going to this bible college was the catalyst to my deconstruction.
I graduated from Valor College (formerly world harvest bible college) The Dean, treated me terribly. If I told you what he called me into his office and did, you wouldn’t believe me. To say nothing of their greed, and false teaching of name it claim it, word of faith heresy.
I'm an Athiest that goes to a christian college, but my college is actually pretty chill. They have worship service, but its completely optional. The professors teach a very secular approach to Science and History, and we even have an LGTB+ club. If it didnt state that its a christian college in the creed, you wouldn't even know.
Although I belonged to the Catholic church (mainly because it had been important to my grandparents), neither church nor faith played a huge role in my life, apart from going into catholic religious study at school and really enjoying it in terms of discussion and so on. Since nobody ever made a big deal out of sexuality, it was not a big deal for me and it just happened when it happened. So what you guys describe here almost sounds like a story from a whole different world to me. In any case, thank you for sharing, the more we know about other life models the more we can understand and be kind to people.
There's a pretty well know fundamentalist college near my high school town, some of my graduating class went there along with some of our teachers (it is a public school). Years later in graduate school (Big State University) I got to know someone (former fundamentalist) who went to this college. She affirmed my suspicions that such institutions tend to produce two kinds of people: those who are isolated from mainstream society and tend to be clueless about routine daily things, and others who got very good at evading the rules.
I went to a Christian college. I met my husband at the church that sponsored that school. They almost kicked me out for asking to let a fellow student stay at my apartment during Christmas. She got pregnant and the school kicked her out of the dorm. She and her boyfriend had no where to go. So a Christian college told me to deny shelter to a young unmarried woman and her boyfriend... At Christmas. Does anyone else see the correlation to Mary and Joseph?
Wow how godly they were 😍
That doesnt matter to them. Those are just "nice" stories.
Wow!! You should publish that story near Christmas time!!!
Wtf, at your apt? As in, you lived off campus in an apt not affiliated with the school?
I think you were supposed to let her in only if she were a virgin and was bearing the child of the Holy Spirit. Very specific circumstances
At my christian university (ACU) they banned dancing on campus, and the students would joke about it all the time. If someone bobbed their head or shook their hips a little, there was always a student who might say "Woah woah, that's not allowed lol." We had a funny saying: "The reason we can't have premarital sex is because it could lead to dancing."
😂
That’s ridiculous. There’s nothing in the Bible against dancing. These types of “christians” are driving people away from Christ.
@@melaniegroce4878 Well the school isn’t a church, so they can make whatever rules they think will make their students better Christians. I would be cautious about labeling them as the _fake_ Christians (that’s a No True Scotsman).
Is that Abilene Christian university?
@@nadiadalleh4940 Yeah. Graduated in 2014
That’s awesome! I’m from Brownwood and have had friends go to there and Harden-Simmons! Then we have Howard Payne down here. They are everywhere!
"I'm not ex gay I just used to be gay" is..... an interesting take....
He's not ex gay, he's still gay, he just gave up the "gay lifestyle", he's chaste. Forever. So he lives like me, only I'm asexual and happy with it while he's miserable.
I've listened to Yuan speak before, and he still says that he is "same-sex attracted," but he's committed to celibacy and doesn't want to define himself by the "gay lifestyle," so he just doesn't use the word "gay" to describe himself.
@@christianjalexander How depressing
when i still went to a super strict, conservative, christian school, i had a teacher who said the same sort of thing. she said when she was in high school she identified as bisexual but then she became christian and turned away from “that lifestyle” and was “straight”. she’s now married to a man, of course. and she told us that being queer is a choice and that you can change it because she did. like okay girl you keep lying to yourself then i hope you’re happy. the real issue with it is that her sharing that just added fuel to the fire of my friends in that class who were all (of course) extremely homophobic and believe that it is a choice. this was also during the time i had begun to realize that i’m not straight and was really struggling with coming to terms with that and finding my identity. i already felt completely shunned by my friends who i had come out to (as they directly told me i was going to hell and am living a life of sin and blah blah), and her saying that added to their ostracizing and confirming their biases. i feel so sad for queer people who live their lives like that in such deep-rooted shame and hate that they (not everyone of course but for the ones who do) in turn use that to further the homophobia within religion. it’s so both directly and indirectly harmful for people like me who are stuck in that situation and manipulation and because of the negative views it fuels, which like i said, just added to my own “friends” turning more against me. sorry for the rant, it just hit close to my heart
Being raised as a pastors kid in purity culture is probably why I am such a kinkster today. These rules are hilarious now.
Pretty sure my former classmates would be shocked that I practice BDSM now. LOL
@@amezrismommigower6839 lmao imagine their faces!
@@amezrismommigower6839 Pretty sure some of them do more than that, and still show up every Sunday for church, lol.
Given kinky people just replicate a lot of it, men controlling and hurting women but like lol tell teen girls no man will want them first and its totes fine
@@nickywal im not sure I follow. Can you ellaborate?
The biggest thing I took away from going to Christian college was how desperate they were to treat us like children. Heavily monitored, but also encouraged to get married asap. Totally bizarre.
Some yes and some no. I am not saying that is not your experience because some are like that but not all. I do not think many of the above rules are treating students like kids. I do not agree with all. Being so scared of any opposite sex interaction is not good.
@@carlpeterson8182 which ones do you find reasonable then?
@@carlpeterson8182can you explain further?
I feel like the further I am from my Christian college experience, the more clarity I have that it was all about control
@@haze7972 100%
When I was a senior in high school, my parents' friends naturally assumed I would be attending a Christian college. I was concerned about over-the-top rules and attesting to a faith I had already walked away from. It sounds like my concerns were spot-on.
“Getting married at 21 is a nice middle of the road age” and “25 is kind of late to be getting married.” LOL! That makes me feel like my wedding, when I was 28, was a “geriatric” marriage. 🤣
I was 33 🤷🏼♀️ and my one year old was there
I’m 29 and getting married at 33 sounds way too young to me lmao
I was 44 and my wife 41. First marriage for each.
21 seems to me like the youngest possible age at which a person could reasonably be married. 25 seems a little younger than ideal, but not too much so. I'm 32 and have never been married and don't expect to.
@@McFlinglesonsome people are getting married right out of highschool at my community college and it baffles me
I thought college was an opportunity to become a responsible adult. These schools sound like authoritarian middle school to me
As a non American, I thought colleges in the US were a place of constant partying with red glasses, a lot of alcohol and free sex
It's exactly like authoritarian middle school. I'd you're lucky you'll find one or two teachers who encourage you to step outside the Christian bubble and engage with other ideas. If you're unlucky, you never learn critical thinking or how to love yourself.
Francesco, that’s State Universities. ;)
Do you thnk the same if you are required to attend class or lectures? Many colleges still require that of students.
@@carlpeterson8182 required in what way? Most classes do have an attendance policy but that's not in opposition to learning to be an adult... you can freely be irresponsible and be dropped or fail your classes. That's not helicoptering in the same way these rules are describing. That's just regular learning to fail or succeed by your own merit.
After graduating from high school I took a gap year as an exchange student and was put into an all boys Christian school in a very religious country. I have been an atheist for my entire life so this was a big change for me. Two moments stand out to me from my time there. First, my history teacher once asked my class to raise our hands if we were not Christian, and I was one of two people who raised our hands. She then had both of us explain our beliefs for the class. I was terrified that I was in trouble cause corporal punishment was a thing there, but that teacher loved to ask her class somewhat invasive questions and she was just genuinely curious. A little later in the school year one of our teachers came out as gay and it was a huge scandal, like front page news scandal, and he had to resign. The same history teacher from before asked our class what we thought of homosexuality and this time I was the only one who thought there was nothing wrong with it and who actively supported the teacher who had resigned. Got a lot of weird looks from the class but otherwise didn't face much backlash. Some other teachers in the school were physically reprimanding students who were pro LGBT but my history teacher was pretty chill and I probably got a pass from the others cause I was international. Both were very uncomfortable situations but helped me get better at voicing my own opinions, even when in the minority.
You were very brave!!
As someone who narrowly avoided attending a christian college, I am SO glad I dodged that bullet.
My ex went to a Christian college like this. Hours for genders in dorm halls, required chapel, and lots of homophobia! It is so damaging and also infantilizing to be treated like that! Glad you both made it out together, and keep up the great content! 💙
I think part of the reason we love having Drew on the channel is you two are so adorable together. Love your dynamic when you're chatting together and how he looks at you when you're talking.
I toured a colleg that had the chapel requirement. After being told about it my twin and I immediately started brainstorming ways out of it. When we started discussing them on the car ride home my parents laughed and just told us we didn't have to apply.
I'm glad my parents didn't force the religious college thing. They would have been excited if I chose a Catholic school. But, I was so done with the church at that point.
I will say that my experience at this exact school was less than rosy, but my real grief comes from a student who got deported with his pregnant wife because of the school. They were both kicked out for having premarital relations and it derailed their entire life. While I have plenty of trauma and some legitimate PTSD from certain experiences with professors on power trips, nothing I experienced compared to what happened to them. To give a school the power to ruin lives over these rules is truly mind boggling. And just a few years later a guy only received a brief suspension for threatening his girlfriend with a gun while on campus, with witnesses. There can be good in a small university experience and even good at this school, but there are a lot of more complex questions to ask about treating adults like small children (the no drinking for anyone even over breaks at home with family still stands) and welding enough power to essentially derail entire lives for petty things like "I don't think you should be allowed to express your sexuality"
The school also fired a staff member for being gay in a really dramatic manner.
I hope that others have been harmed less by going there, but so much of it looking back was just indoctrination and getting us to go along with it to earn enough points to be worthy of a god we were told could never actually love us.
Wow, I'm sorry to hear about the students who were deported for having premarital sex. That's awful. I hadn't heard of that happening, but it's not surprising. I had a friend who became pregnant, and the school was going to require them to attend daily counseling in order to keep attending. They didn't want to do that (I don't blame them), and transferred to another school.
I also heard about the staff member who was fired for being gay. That's truly, truly awful.
I'm so sorry all that happened and I don't agree with all the strict rules and indoctrination that the school has
It really fascinates me how little they trust their students. You have this supposed crop of wonderful pious kids... and you have to mandate chapel, mandate sexual purity through all these rules, and so on
Funny chapel story. Our school also used chapel for school announcements. One time after a very dramatic lesson about humility and not giving in to pride, our student government came up to announce that our football team made it into division 1. They brought in the cheerleaders and played some epic music, and introduced a new logo.
No one was sure if they were serious because it contrasted so much with the lesson, so we all left chapel super confused lol.
OMG, this brings back the awful memories from the early 80's when I had to go Bob Jones University for 1 1/2 years. I finally begged my parents to let me come home and it was the best decision for me. I ended up graduating from Eastern Mennonite University and loved it!
I went to college at Lander in Greenwood, SC and the horror stories about Bob Jones we heard. Oh gosh. Chilling. I once borrowed some good books from there for a religion paper using interlibrary loan though lol
Growing up evangelical, i went to youth camps, and they had alotnof these same rules, we had to be 6 feet apart from girls, our bags were checked and searched for "worldly" items. We had to attend chapel 3 times a day, we had devotionals in between. Very heavily regulated. I remember when we had pool time, the guys went at a certain time, and the girls went at another time.
Same for my church camp, except at mine they also banned the basketball court when the opposite gender was swimming, because you could oversee the pool from the basketball court.
7:12 in middle school, there was a former escort that came to a Wednesday night youth group service.🤯 I don’t remember a lot about the conversation. As an adult looking back, it was completely inappropriate. But I do remember she told us how to jump out of a moving car safely because she had to do it a couple times….
Wow! I am 99% sure I went to that same school from 2013-2015. Those rules brought back a lot of forgotten memories. As a music student I remember the piano practice rooms in The Maddox Center were a popular spot for couples to be alone. My dorm room overlooked the chapel lawn so my roommate and I would look for couples doing the “walk” and predict if they would end up getting married or not. One of the random things I remember is a guy getting kicked out of school because he was growing weed in Pringle cans.
What's the school?
@@hanneloreclemenson1228 Williams Baptist University
OMG, I _love_ the thought of randy students actually _reserving scheduled time_ in any available room with the potential for a little bit of co-ed privacy.
The first time I had sleep paralysis I woke up and it was like the girl from the ring on top of me scratching me except I couldn’t feel the scratches. I was in 7th grade. I closed my eyes and prayed and it eventually stopped so for years I was so convinced I had demons torturing me at night and I didn’t tell anyone. It was so scary. Eventually in high school I googled stuff that made me realize I wasn’t possessed. Phew what a relief.
Im so glad I've never experienced this. If I did I think I would actually have a reason to beleiev in demons!
I've had sleep paralysis from time to time over the years, but most of the time I didn't experience the presence of some kind of being, which I've been told is common with sleep paralysis. A few times I felt like there was an evil, non-corporeal presence that I couldn't see, which overtime I took to calling the Malignant Entity. At some point I realized that I unconsciously based that phrase off the Crystalline Entity from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
I attended Bethel University (back when it was a college). One of the rules we agreed to in order to attend was no dancing. Several students from the student government danced to “Wild Thing” at a public outdoor concert on campus. They were required to make public apologies in the school newspaper. Which was then posted on bulletin boards around campus. Public shaming anyone?
Additional rules: no drinking alcohol, no illicit drug use, no smoking, no premarital sex, no pornography, no gambling (I avoided playing cards of any kind on campus). And of course you had to profess to be a Christian to go there.
Sounds about the same as my school. Also, there was only a single "co-ed" dorm, but only the lobby was shared; the building had a boys half and a girls half.
I went to a different Christian school and it also had the no dancing rule. While I was there, the original movie Footloose came out in theaters. Practically the entire dormitory population showed up at the movie on premiere night.
"no drinking alcohol, no illicit drug use, no smoking, no premarital sex, no pornography, no gambling (I avoided playing cards of any kind on campus). And of course you had to profess to be a Christian to go there" and? Let me guess a western godless and souless idiot who wants commit the shittest things, because she is so stupid to give her life away, for stupid modern things?
You are really lost western godless idiot and who said the opposite is an hipocrite.
@@JM-us3frthat sounds pretty normal, at least the separation between men and women part
Bethel in Roseville, MN?
As a side note, I cannot tell you how amazing it is that you guys talked about fucking chapel man... I have wanted to cathartically get over this crap for most of my adult life, and this video helped me do that. Thank you!
The anecdote about Drew's lady friend caught my attention, as I had assumed highly religious people basically didn't believe in opposite gender friendships (that they'd think it inevitably leads to something else because surely that's the only type of connection men and women can have). I'm curious, were opposite gender friendships common in that school/community? Or was Drew an outlier for being friends with a woman?
When I was in Evangelical circles as a teen/young adult it was common to be friends with the opposite sex as long as you were never alone together. It was even encouraged to a point so that girls could find a suitable husband from within the religion.
I went to this school. It's not unheard of for there to be platonic friendships between people of different genders. What is more unheard of is those friendships always being platonic and not getting messy. I thought I had several guy friends and found out eventually that I did not, I had been girlfriend zoned by most of them instead and it sucked.
@@ihartwinxclub oof, that's so true. The girlfriend zone is a really unnerving place to be. I seemed to unintentionally convince a young gentleman I wanted to court and then marry because we danced at a wedding, messaged on Facebook occasionally about nerd stuff, and I sat next to him during College group often.
I didn't realize we'd been on group dates until our other friends told me. I genuinely thought it was just a group of messy kids too entangled in each other's lives hanging out at the movies or bowling or whatever. Then by our second solo date he was talking about how many kids he wanted in the next 5 years after getting married. And when he mentioned I wouldn't have to work after grad school and could just stay at home because he makes enough, it dawned on me: he doesn't see me as a person. He sees me as a baby maker with cute silly thoughts about stuff I don't need to bother myself with.
And I had to shut that down immediately, because I didn't major in history with a focus on religious dissent and philosophy in 17th century England to be a housewife. And I certainly don't want children, especially if I have to push it out my own personal vajayjay that I'm not sure I really want men to get near in the first place, so how we'd make those babies is anyone's guess.
But somehow, at the end of this whole series of unfortunate fundie events, I was the bad guy. Some awful Jezebel who took advantage of a man's weaknesses for personal gain, when all I did was be nice to a person who was cool to talk to and nice to me too.
In my experience, guy/girl friendships were pretty common. A lot of my friends were guys. It was discouraged to be alone together, though.
@@theantibot That's very interesting, thanks for the info!
At the Christian University I attended, the running joke was "don't have sex because it leads to dancing!" And there definitely was pressure in jr/sr years to get that "ring before spring."
We had a lot of the same rules as mentioned in the video. Did they give out "rape whistles" at yours, too?
Yup, I got caught breaking many weird rules. The strangest ones always revolved around not causing "our brothers to stumble". If they only knew I was not interested at all. 😁 Too much hyper focus on the body, clothes, how to wear your bag so you dont crease your breasts, sitting a certain feet from men, how to not eat seductively, and no doing nothing that gives the appearance of evil...like talking to a guy outside at 8 o dark. There's too many rules ya'll, makes my head hurt.
"eating seductively" made me throw up in my mouth a little lol
being told to wear your bag a certain way because mammary tissue exists made me throw up in my mouth a little.
Sounds a little like Bob Jones University
Fellow former student from the same Christian college here 👋 I spent a lot of my life at that college-my dad has worked there for decades, and I have fond memories of visiting him at his office, eating at the cafeteria, touring new buildings before they were opened to the public(my dad pulled all the fiber-optic cable for the chapel building, student center, etc), and feeding the ducks at the pond.
I was there eventually as a student, and I loved the faculty so much and learned a lot. But the workload was a lot for me and sometimes I had to choose between studying for tests and going to chapel, or else I’d fall behind on my credits. It tore me up because I’m a rule-follower and I couldn’t scan and run, but as a commuter with a part time job I could only delegate so much time to chapel, homework, work, and sleep. with my education came new questions I asked about my faith and about myself, questions that I never, ever felt safe talking about on campus. I got to the point where I couldn’t handle school and had a mental breakdown.
Took a gap year and, 3 years later, I’m still on that gap year. I deconstructed, came out as gay, and could look back at my school experience without the rose-colored glasses. Chapel was brainwashing, devotional before each class as well. It was completely and totally immersive, and even in an educational setting I felt like the hard topics were always being tiptoed around. There was a witch hunt-for lack of a better term- against the gay or affirming staff. My sibling, who was affirming and gay themselves, became pregnant and was told their job would not be available to them after they were finished with maternity leave.
I loved my friends, and I loved my profs-one of my English professors inspired me to finish my first novel, and I’ll never forget what he taught me. I loved the small class settings and felt like I learned a lot. But the good just doesn’t outweigh the bad for me. As a gay, affirming, deconstructed, pro choice person, there is absolutely no room for me there if I decided to go back, regardless of how much I value what I learned from my professors and the class material. I loved that college, but looking back at it now, I realize that that college didn’t love me back.
I'm so intrigued. The ducks at the pond and some of the things they've said really sound like where my god mother works and my god sister graduated from. I mean. The egg farmers. That's really specific to be different colleges, especially considering these two and I are the same age.
Update: after intense research, the Egg Farmer man apparently tours 😭 he's been to multiple schools. It's a joke everywhere apparently.
Man, your last sentence sounds like how I feel about my current college. I love the faculty, the curriculum, the clubs, my job, and my friends. The admin does not love us back.
I can't imagine being treated like that as an adult. I mean I experienced this in church events in high school but college. Gross.
I went to two religious based "rehabs" and a woman there had a similar story who came to speak about being a lesbian and I asked her the same question if she was attracted now to men.... and she had the same answer. my heart just breaks ):
Uploaded 22 seconds ago. Let's do this!
Okay so I've finished watching now. That was incredibly insightful. I knew that Christian collages would be heavily controlled, but I didn't realise just how OTT it was. Hand checks? Chapel and devotionals in every class? Thanks to the egg farmer? Damn...
Great video. I learned a lot, and it was very fun.
To be fair,...egg farmers don't get thanked enough😂😂😂
My wife went to a Christian college. I used to call her open dorm hours "visiting hours" to tease.
Really enjoy the collabs with both of you contributing as well as your solo (scripted or otherwise) work. Went to a State Uni where it was the complete opposite. Free for all in most respects. I think a solid middle ground would be helpful concerning structure and whatnot. Thanks for the vid. 🙂
This brings back memories. First, most of my classmates who met and married are now divorced. I know only one couple that made it. Secondly, it was a point of honor and pride to violate every rule before graduation. I proudly say that I did so. The rules were so extreme that I am almost embarrassed to discuss them. During my senior year, they hired a rigid dean that made up a new rule. A couple couldn’t date alone in a car. You had to have either another couple or a chaperone. Yep, we single dated all though high school but weren’t allowed to in our senior year. Thankfully, they dropped the rule halfway though the year. It was unworkable. I broke that rule the first week it was imposed.
I always wonder how these places have coped with students having ubiquitous access to the internet, so they can easily break free from the authoritarian cult-like behavior. If I was my parents' age I could imagine buying into it through being sheltered from the world outside the Christian college bubble, but it's now so easy to just pull out my phone and find info that easily pops that bubble
Back when I was a Christian I was always on my phone or playing in play books in the pews. It wasn't because I was trying to be disrespectful but instead I just couldn't focus. If I had nothing to do for a whole sermon but sit and listen then I would either fall asleep or become super depressed from the lack of stimulation. I always felt bad for my Mom cause people would always look down at her and judge her for letting me play stuff and listen at the same time. She could quiz me after and find that I was in fact listening and got all the info. Thankfully my Mom didn't care about what the others thought of me. Came to find out years later that I have ADHD.
As do I. I do encourage you to be careful with whom you surround yourself.
Did we go to the same college? It was so strange to go to a private school for the first time in college. More rules than I’d had in my entire life yet first time being an adult. I was like is this legal? Lol… I would hide my headphones during chapel. I lasted a few semesters before I dropped out- would not do that for 4 years.
I was born in raised in the town that harbored your university. It was a great place to grow up, and I even attended the church of your college.
I have heard so many horror stories from friends that went, that I'm blown away they are still open.
Love the video!
I went to SBU which, at the time, had Roy Blunt as the President of the school. Yes, THAT Roy Blunt. While i really liked most of my professors, I was so upset when I found out that the school taught that women who were in abusive marriages had to stay with their husbands. There was NO reason for divorce. And purity culture was not just a thing, it was pushed and pushed and pushed. The joke was that our school was called Southwest Bridal University for the number of marriages that occurred. If I had to do it again, there is no way in hell I would ever go there.
I live in the area and have lots of old classmates and extended family members who went there. I'm so glad that I came to the realization that Christianity isn't for me before I graduated high school. Religious universities weren't even on my radar, and I can only imagine how much I would hate attending one
Roy Blunt bas misinterpreted The Bible.
Yeah I know some people that went there. I even stayed the night there once. I went to Kansas State for a year though.
So I had elected to go to a different Christian college, girls curfew was 12 and boys was 2:00 a.m. you could get an extension to 1:00 a.m. as a female if your parents gave permission. Well I was 18 and had been living on my own for a year and told my ra if she called my mom that was at her own risk. She calls my mom and she said why are you calling me about an adult who is paying for their own tuition please do not call here again. I got my extension but now I realize wait why did we have a different curfew LOL
My partner and I had very similar experiences and stories from our evangelical undergrad in Ohio. There was also a strict no-drinking law, even when at home with family when you were of age, but by senior year I would skip chapel to buy beer because I knew no one would be at the grocery store.
😂
This is such a mood haha, as an ohioan this gives cedarville vibes, which I narrowly avoided :)
@@AnnaRenee you made the right choice 😂
@@AnnaReneeCedarville was associated with The Church I grew up in. I could deal with the rules of Cedarville Today because I no longer would have to wear skirts to class. The rules in the 90s were too rigid for my liking.
This made me cry a little bit when you guys talked about getting in trouble for sitting “too close”. Like I also hated getting in trouble and as a Christian it was like anything you did was a direct slap in the face to God even when it wasn’t a big deal or a problem. I spent a lot of time trying to avoid anything like that for fear of being shamed and embarrassed. I’m so happy to be free from that life. So glad I didn’t have to deal with all that in college. I’m so glad you guys had each other and still have a great college experience.
As a fellow atheist and former religiotard who once attended a Christian college for a year, it's a pleasure to come across your channel 💯
Wow you two had to deal with some crazy rules! Great video. Makes me even more grateful for going to a non religious school.
The bonus rule of No Dancing just blew my mind! Your college was Dirty Dancing before Kevin Bacon showed up!! Did you know anyone that would get in trouble often for dancing or kicked out of the school because they’d dance a lot?
I attended a Christian college, too, and I found this quite fascinating. In some ways my school was a lot more strict than yours, and in others it sounds like the opposite. Overall this was really relatable, though. Your conclusions about how patronizing all the rules were really resonate with me. Thanks for sharing!
It’s probably not as astronomical a coincidence as it seems, but my mind is being blown a little bit from stumbling across the UA-cam channels of both sides of a couple within a span of months, by total accident. I remember watching a couple Genetically Modified Skeptic videos in the past, and I’ve started watching Antibot just within the last few days, only to discover he’s her husband! In the endless ocean of UA-cam creators, what are the odds of that?
Pretty high, considering the algorithm knows all haha
Now imagine seeing this video and then finding Drew in your yearbook! I'm still shook.
I was almost forced to go to a Catholic college. Catholics get a bad rap, but they are WAY less strict than evangelicals. The only major rules were you had to attend mass once a week and that boys and girls had to leave each other's dorms by 10pm.
It was still too strict for me. But I didn't find it unreasonable.
At my Christian college, it was called "Slide and Glide" when people would swipe their card and try to walk away. We also had a yearly tradition at our college called "sexual wholeness week," which would always be the most uncomfortable/awkward/also titulating week of personal testimonies. 😆 "Ex gay" stuff was lumped into that week. I think it was the theme one year.
We also had rules regarding dorm floor hours where if someone of the opposite sex was visiting and we were sitting together on a couch or bed, everyone's feet had to be touching the ground. The RA would patrol the floor to make sure all feet were on the ground.
That last paragraph reminds me of a teen academic camp I used to go to. It wasn't Christian, but we were minors and they obviously didn't want anyone going home pregnant, so in this case the rule was actually reasonable. Door open, lights on, all persons clearly visible from the door, and feet on the floor. We always laughed about the feet on the floor bit, but I laugh even harder now thinking about some of the things I have done as an adult with my feet on the floor...
I currently go to a Christian college and I can't wait to get out of here. we have a 12am curfew, no drinking, no smoking, no sex, no 'homosexual activity', you can't have someone of the opposite sex in your apartment unless there's another person there, and they absolutely cannot go in the bedrooms or bathrooms. no shorts or capris on campus, no piercings (except one lobe piercing for girls), no tattoos, no 'unnaturally' colored hair, you must go to church regularly, no swearing, and so much more. God I can't wait to graduate. I'm really glad I have friends who are married so they live in community housing rather than approved student housing (where all single students are required to live), so we can get away with a lot of shit lmao.
That sucks so much
Maybe move out to the countryside. Men can’t bring you closer to God.
My wife and I met at a Christian college as well ( in Canada) . We were required to attend daily chapel too and were allowed to miss only a certain amount. They used to have a student standing at each door with a clipboard to record who was attending ( or who wasn't). I remember confronting the registrar over this and how it violated their precious belief in Liberty of Conscience. We both eventually left the school and now decades later have also left the faith. They had some strange speakers as well, I recall.
I HATED chapel most of the time, but we also had some very insightful speakers who actually changed my views. I think those talks definitely contributed to my eventual deconstruction
I went to Pensacola Christian College haha I've been wanting to do a video on it. I almost got kicked out so many times, and I went to Christian schools my whole life and was a ifdb pastors kid. I was the chaplain and was even a youth minister...but the college sent back a letter to my parents talking about me being a wolf in sheep's clothes
The two of you have a great dynamic in your videos together. But I'd love to hear more from you alone 😊 loved your video about being a missionary kid. I understand it was difficult for you to make, but those personal videos make an impact if you're comfortable with making them. You seem like such a strong woman, it's an inspiration 😊
I went to Moody Bible Institute and met Christopher Yuan, he does conversion therapy for students. I also got a lot of these talks which greatly influenced me as I was realizing I was queer. Id love to discuss this with you!
My Christian high school did hand check as well as we had a ‘PDA Bible’ and if you were sitting too close to the opposite sex then the teacher would come over and make a scene about putting a very thick Bible between you and the other person. 😂😣
I love the way you guys look at each other
I went to a different Christian school than the one you're describing, but a lot of the rules were similar. We had chapel three times a week, and if you missed chapel, there were various consequences. Church attendance was also required, both morning and evening service on Sunday. Classes opened in prayer, but didn't have devotionals. Signing the (very detailed) statement of faith was absolutely required, and your admissions essay was your Christian testimony.
Open dorms happened like one night per semester, so for a lot of students that was a chance to go tour the dorms and see how the other half lived. I remember my roommates looking for strategies to lure girls to want to hang out in our room for a while.
Students had to sign an agreement not to dance or drink alcohol, even during summer break. One economics prof told me that nearly everyone in the administration disagreed with the no dancing rule, but there was one very old lady on the board who would be horribly scandalized if that rule were changed, so they were basically just going to wait to change it until she died. That was about 20 years ago now, so I'm curious whether that change ever happened.
The weirdest unofficial rule was that student organizations were almost completely disallowed. During freshman orientation week, I asked if there was a chess club, and was told "we don't really do clubs here," in a tone that suggested I should have known better than to ask about something so worldly. But there was a rugby club that got started up my senior year, and that was fine.
The theater "department" was essentially a club, and was run by a volunteer director and put on a play each semester on no budget. But that got shut down by the administration, with no official explanation. The shutdown happened during winter break, when all the actors who were going to be in Hamlet the next semester were memorizing their lines. Everyone found out when they got back on campus that the theater program no longer existed. I wasn't involved in that, but I had friends who were. We heard at least four unofficial explanations for what happened:
1) The president of the college supposedly disapproved of theater. This didn't make much sense, given that he'd attended some of the plays and seemed to like them, but for a lot of students if you said that he liked or disliked something, that was almost a command from God.
2) Hamlet contained themes and scenes that were inappropriate for a Christian school. If so, then the prof who taught the Shakespeare class that I took didn't get the memo.
3) The theater program was growing rapidly in popularity, and Hamlet was a very popular play and would cause this growth in popularity to accelerate. But, the administration hadn't worked out what their philosophy of theater was, and they really couldn't allow this thing to continue existing when they didn't have that worked out. So, they were going to develop a philosophy of theater, and once that was done, the program could resume. I heard that it did get started up again a few years later, so maybe this one was accurate. I don't know if they developed an official philosophy of theater or not.
4) Some people in the administration hated the volunteer director, and shutting down the program was the easiest way to get rid of her. This was definitely true, but almost certainly not the official reason the decision was made, however much it may have contributed.
The whole thing was very weird even at the time, but is weirder looking back on it.
I am so interested in the story behind your change from Christianity to Atheism. I grew up Conservative Christian and now that I am in my 30s, I am questioning a lot. Would you consider making such a video? A lot of your videos really resonate with me.
I thinks she talks about it with her husband, Drew, on his channel? I think?
I think they have a video about their joint journey out of Christianity on Drew's channel. You could check that one out!
What's his youtube
@@chloetic genetically modified skeptic
What really resonated with me was discussions using reason and logic. The earlier years of the Atheist Experience was a wonderful awakening for me. I actually believed morals came from the Bible. After watching TAE I discovered our morals are NOT based on the Bible at all.
Golly. I wouldn't think that an institution based on faith would rely on rules to mandate conformity.
We had similar rules.
We had chapel twice a week, (twice a year we had Revival week with eight chapels but only 3 of the 8 were mandatory). We had some outstanding speakers and some really dull ones.
We also had open dorm policies. In the dorms it was twice a week, in the apartments it was 5 days a week. The rule didn’t start to bother me till like senior year.
Some Professors did devotionals but it wasn’t a rule. I think my Intro to Sociology, Geology Gen Ed, and Math Gen Ed all did.
The school I attended is part of a denomination that also doesn’t support drinking for it’s members (clergy cannot at all) and so the school didn’t allow drinking. While you could be kicked out of school, I actually told our university chaplain that I drink during my senior year because I was close to him and he said “If you’re smart enough to drink safe and not get caught, you’re smart enough to drink. The rule is truly to prevent illegal drinking and dumb drinking.”
We did not have any of those bonus rules at the end.
Drew got so red when you guys talked about the blanket fort lmao you guys are so cute!!
I love all of your videos, but there is a special energy that comes from all the videos with you and Drew together. It's cool to see and it feels like I'm with friends. It feels like my husband and I are talking about my deconversion from Christianity. Thanks for this video. It was great.
I worked at a mega church for a couple of years that actually had very similar rules in our employment contract you had to be at church every week, you had to be in a small group, volunteer in at least one big church event a year, couldn't drink period even inside your own home, can't engage in "homosexual sin", if they found out that you had pre martial sex you could get fired I was 19 and I firmly indoctrinated so I didn't see anything wrong with it but in hindsight YIKES that job is actually what made me eventually leave the church
My college roommate attended Eton, which is a posh upper class boys private school in the UK. There was mandatory chapel when he was there. Eton is ostensibly secular
Sounds like "we don't care which God, but pick one"
Guessing they want the best political optics for their next generation of prominent shitmunchers
The UK has so much more overt Christianity in schools than the US. But also Eton is for children, mandatory chapel in college is a different thing.
@@elizabethmcintosh6722 Aren't the publicly funded schools in the UK all basically C of E? America doesn't have an official religion but England does, and England doesn't have the separation of church and state, yet the US is so much more militantly Christian.
18:00 >"no alcohol, even if you're 21. They take this super-serious"
lol. This is like the 100% opposite of uni in Australia- One of the main rituals at uni is "O-Week" (Orientation week) the first week of each year, nominally to teach new students where stuff is, do "ice-breaker" activites, etc... but mostly it's just free beer, almost 24/7, for the whole week. Drinking-age is 18 here, and MOST first-year uni students are 18, but 17yo first-year students aren't that rare, and no-one stops them drinking. Hell, it's pretty common for local high-schoolers to """sneak""" on campus (ie, they WALK on campus, but very dishonestly fail to wear "I'M UNDERAGE, PLZ PREVENT ME FROM DRINKING" t-shirts), to take advantage of o-week.
And that's just one of several events each year when it's standard for all unis to put on free beer. Basically anything that requires you put a desk outdoors, or where there'll be students gathering not in a lecture-hall, it'll PROBABLY have free beer... (kind of exagerating... but not by much...)
“Holy Sexuality”?
My sexuality always centers around one hole or another….
I'm glad I decided to go to a secular school because I thought being challenged would "strengthen my faith" lol Also Christian schools were just much more expensive
I really enjoyed you and Savanna back to back readings of the transcripts. XD
I love seeing you guys together on both your channels. You two are adorable
All of this sounds so similar to my experiences in college though I know I definitely went to a different school than you because we had chapel EVERY DAY with only 15 skips allowed per semester
Man! That’s intense! I can’t imagine chapel every day 😩
@@theantibot Yeah it wasn't the most popular
We had chapel Monday through Friday. You got 18 skips a semester. One guy I knew supposedly overskipped on purpose to get kicked out. Though it is possible it was something more serious and he just said that. Some people never admitted to what their discipline was about. One guy had to move out of the dorm to live with an older married couple off campus I suppose to be supervised. Never knew why, even though I knew him fairly well.
I only took a campus tour and didn't end up attending, and I don't think this is the school you went to, but so much of this made me think of what I saw at Oral Roberts University. Their motto was "to the uttermost bounds of the earth" because their main objective was not necessarily education, but sending witnesses out to every corner. That student who sailed out to the remote island and was killed by North Sentinel islanders attended ORU, and I was not surprised in the least to hear that when the news broke. I also toured other schools near me like Evangel University and Sterling College. This stuff could have applied to any of them, and looking back, I'm so glad I didn't spend 3x more money on them over my local public university. The immense amount of monitoring doesn't make any sense to me if you want students to truly follow and love God. Wouldn't he know the difference between someone whose heart is in the right place and really wanted to serve him vs. just following the rules to avoid getting kicked out?
Another thing that really struck me at ORU was a 10,000-step-per-day requirement. Upon enrollment, you received a fitness tracker from the school. It was GRADED and I think it went on your transcript each semester you were there as some sort of Physical Education. Of course, for an able-bodied person, it would not have been hard to hit that number with how deliberately far apart the buildings seemed to be built on the campus. But you couldn't take days off unless you wanted your grade to go down. I asked someone on my tour what happened over the holidays if you went home to see your family, and they said you still had to walk.
My mom who came with me on the ORU tour is wheelchair-bound. I cannot begin to tell you how difficult it was to get her across campus and inside all these tall buildings with steps in front and ramps somewhere in the back. Sometimes we missed half of an event scheduled on the tour just looking for a working elevator which was hidden in some broom closet only accessible to the janitor, who couldn't be found. We stayed overnight and my parents sat in their hotel room the whole second day to avoid a repeat of the navigation disaster. I had multiple ankle surgeries in high school and was already scared of what would happen to me if I needed another one in my years there and couldn't get to my classes or "hit my steps." On top of the blaring ableist vibes and inaccessibility, I was laughed at by a director of a music department I met with for saying that I aspired to one day be like a famous worship leader. Needless to say, none of the experience made me feel welcomed or encouraged to attend. And this was only in 2016, I should add, not the Stone Age (well, it sure felt like the Stone Age at ORU).
Bible school I attended had students to agree to underwear checks no pants and bras mandatory and not distracting. The Dean was fired for having a affair with a student later rehired same school Rodney Howard browne attended and lectured at. Good thing they never checked my panties or assumed I might be wearing a inappropriate pair.....
@Richdragon banned bras that were distracting under wire was pushing the line lace that could be seen likewise..... Not wearing a bra would get you sent home. So by extension any blouse or dress could not be see through at all
Underwear checks. Wow. I guess it's technically legal because you technically agreed to it, but any normal human would recognize that you were only agreeing under pressure, and that. Was. Not. OK. Good lord.
I never comment on anything, but I just had to after watching this video.
I went to the same school, so this video brought back a lot of memories. It’s funny how certain rules and ways of doing things felt okay at the time, but looking back, they feel far from okay. I’m thankful for meeting my husband there as well as some friends, but a part of me regrets going there. One of my worst experiences was a RD (& their faculty spouse) that were such bullies. They gaslit me (my favorite experience was when they accused me of threatening them 🙃) before I even knew what that was. Don’t even get me started on the blatant misogyny…I’m still processing the damages of that and the effects of purity and modesty culture that were part of the culture on campus.
There are secular campuses that are "dry" as well, but I don't know how common it is.
I was raised in a very very bizarre church that was actually kicked out of the baptists club. The 'regular' day school required seniors to do full school work and then also do a bible college course on top of that at the church's bible college. There was a meeting where a student stood up and decented against it and we never saw her again after that.
wow, these rules are bonkers. I was sent to a christian high school for 2 years and going to mandatory chapel once a week was already awful. (tbh I skipped it half the time. I got caught once and got in BIG trouble) I can't imagine three times a week, plus church. but for a university to control so many aspects of (mostly) legal adults lives is really weird and invasive
I loved it when drew said "not only are they dishonouring the college, but they're also dishonouring the Lord ". HAHAHAHAHA
This sounds exactly like the college I went to freshman year(BIOLA). my whole family graduated from there except me...
When did u attend Biola?
@@marshahollings 2014-15
An hour long chapel 3 days a week is wild. My college it wasn't required but encouraged and it was 15 or 20 min tops.
the no dancing rule to me is wild. I never went to a religious educational institute, but I was heavily involved in christian unions and societies all throughout university. The main "wholesome fun" that we could do was a ceilidh (a traditional scottish dance a bit like a barn dance or square dance). Since this was the most wild thing you could do without being judged, I went to a *lot* of ceilidhs in my formative years!
Some Christian denominations viewed dancing as something that "worldly" people did, so it became forbidden. You see it with some of the more fundamentalist churches. I attended a Church of Christ high school for a couple of years and dancing is a hard no for that church. It might lead to sex, after all. Most of the students and a lot of the teachers thought it was an absurd restriction but the older people who were in charge were pretty set on it.
I had a very similar experience at Brigham Young University. Excellent academics, incredibly infantilizing rules. I loved my time there though.
"It was almost as serious as being gay." Hahahahhaa
I'm new to your channel and had no idea that you're a pilot! In high school I wanted to be a commercial pilot, but I decided to pursue art and design as a career instead
I'm pretty sure I know which college you are referring to, and my Christian middle school was kind of a feeder school into it. They would visit and give material to the 8th graders about the college, to get their foot in the door before the kids went off to public high school. I actually considered going there later when I was looking at colleges, but I was already in a relationship with my husband and I was worried that it wouldn't survive that environment. My relationship with my husband was always more important to me than my relationship with "God," even though I would never have admitted it.
I worked at a 24H Starbucks here in Chicago and we had soooo many Moody Bible students on both sides of the counter. It was an experience, especially because I was like 23-24 and many of the people we worked with were gay.
Dunking you in a pond when you’re going to get married.
In a town near us (Gosport Indiana) we had a spring tank they called the “Chivery” tank. We were told that several generations ago a fellows friends would haul him off and dunk him there a few days before the wedding but no one had done this for years.
The dorm visits are reminiscent of the rules when I attended a state university in the 80's. We had specified hours, the door had to be open, and both people had to have at least one foot on the floor.
I had a very similar Christian college experience with almost identical rules about co-mingling in dorms, hangups about dancing, etc (Drew is right, it had to do with the crossing of legs)! Of course we were a totally dry campus and our statement of faith included a pledge abstaining from all forms of alcohol... HOWEVER my college also had a semester abroad program in a country where drinking wine was simply part of the culture. Students were regularly served it in their host homes by locals who were also Christians, but did not have the same hangups about alcohol. The college program director quietly let the prohibition slide, and he made up his own unofficial drinking rules, which were basically: 1) you can only drink wine, not spirits 2) you can only drink wine if served to you in the privacy of a family home, and it would be considered rude to refuse 3) you cannot drink to excess (one glass is enough) 4) you may not purchase wine or spirits in any store or restaurant. Of course students did not always follow these rules and did drink spirits to excess that they bought at stores, on occasion, but for the most part, students were responsible. The situation went largely unnoticed by the rest of the school for a few years, but eventually, word of this debauched spring break, glass-o-wine drinking behavior got the attention of the most prudeiest members of the school, who had a total meltdown. It was a full on scandal with people petitioning and demanding the resignation of the program director. He barely kept his job, but of course students were no longer allowed to have wine, even if 21 (of course 18 was the drinking age in the host country). Even then, I thought the whole thing was ridiculous.
The Christian University I went to also had Chapel. We were required a certain number of hours each semester. You could attend the 'hour' of chapel three times a week, you could get an hour from the Friday Night chapel and you could get up to four hours from the Day of Service/Day of Prayer (One each semester).
We had 3 Dorm Buildings plus Married Student Housing. The oldest of the three buildings was co-ed and you had to be in 2 year or above to live there... they closed it down between my 1st and 2nd years. So then all of the underclassmen were in the segregated dorms. We had some 'open dorm time', but it was scheduled, and if you did not belong in that dorm, you had to be let in by someone else.
We didn't have devotionals, but we did start class with prayer most of the time. On the other hand, we had Student Ministries... 25 hours minimum a term working with a church and 8 one-hour meetings with a mentor.
Also had a Dry Campus, even if you were over-age.
There was a declaration of faith that I had to sign, and I think I had to write down a good part of my theology as well.
We had to be careful about co-ed dancing... if you were too close, then you could get scolded
oh my God I cannot imagine the trauma that a gay person would walk away with if they went to that school
I went to this school and knew some gay students. Trauma, yes. 😬
No wonder I relate to you two so much! I went there too. Crazy to think about!
I went to a bible college which was exclusively for learning about the bible/becoming pastors, missionaries, etc. It was all this and more.
So even on top of ALL of our classes being bible focused, we were required to go to chapel every weekday on top of church every Sunday. Oh and we were all assigned to Care Groups that met every other week, and we were all encouraged to have someone in a year ahead of us 'disciple' us.
We also had separate dorms, but our open dorms only happened like twice a year for a few hours.
And at the beginning of every year, the girls had this 'fashion show' where they'd display all of the the rules for modesty so we didn't cause our brothers in christ to 'stumble' 😑
We also had a curfew, wwre watched carefully when it came to even potential male-female relationships (as in, the staff would literally discuss who was spending time with who in staff meetings 🙁. We were also required to participate in spiritual emphasis weeks (because apparently daily bible classes and chapels, plus church and care groups wasn't enough spiritual emphasis), missions week, and camp week.
Oh and besides no alcohol, allowed piercings were very limited, and no tattoos were allowed. Man as I list all of this, it just strikes me as way more odd than I used to think this was all no big deal.
Twist ending - going to this bible college was the catalyst to my deconstruction.
No sex standing up...
It could lead to dancing.
It's just good sense.
🙃
I graduated from Valor College (formerly world harvest bible college)
The Dean, treated me terribly.
If I told you what he called me into his office and did, you wouldn’t believe me.
To say nothing of their greed, and false teaching of name it claim it, word of faith heresy.
Another great video. I wonder if there were lecturers or professors who the guys suspected of being atheists.
I'm an Athiest that goes to a christian college, but my college is actually pretty chill. They have worship service, but its completely optional. The professors teach a very secular approach to Science and History, and we even have an LGTB+ club. If it didnt state that its a christian college in the creed, you wouldn't even know.
Although I belonged to the Catholic church (mainly because it had been important to my grandparents), neither church nor faith played a huge role in my life, apart from going into catholic religious study at school and really enjoying it in terms of discussion and so on.
Since nobody ever made a big deal out of sexuality, it was not a big deal for me and it just happened when it happened.
So what you guys describe here almost sounds like a story from a whole different world to me. In any case, thank you for sharing, the more we know about other life models the more we can understand and be kind to people.
There's a pretty well know fundamentalist college near my high school town, some of my graduating class went there along with some of our teachers (it is a public school).
Years later in graduate school (Big State University) I got to know someone (former fundamentalist) who went to this college. She affirmed my suspicions that such institutions tend to produce two kinds of people: those who are isolated from mainstream society and tend to be clueless about routine daily things, and others who got very good at evading the rules.
The concept of open dorms makes it seem like, despite being very against queer relationships there, it was very easy to do that kind of stuff there.