When Autistic Special Interests Go WRONG
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- Опубліковано 13 бер 2024
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Evil Autism: / evilautism
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I Hate Dogs: www.reddit.com/r/evilautism/c...
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DISCLAIMER: I am a second-year psychology student and a late-diagnosed #actuallyautistic individual. I am not a qualified healthcare professional.
Hopefully this one gives you a laugh! We need a cure for neurotypical spectrum disorder urgently 👀
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I've said this before and I'll say it again: anyone who claims autistic people have no sense of humour has clearly never hung out in autistic places. We're hilarious! Going to go check out that sub now...
Ooo, can we use ABA on the neurotypicals?
I personally have been using the up and downvotes as a like and dislike button but apparently that's not what it's for
@@michaelpineiro533GENIUS
My special interest is in the psychology of fraud, like con artists, cults, and manipulation, but I would never actually enact those behaviors. So joke or not, while I could understand a fascination with the psychological concept of cheating, claiming the behavior as a special interest is BS
Yup! When my special interest was something similarly dark, I wrote it into a fictional story I was working on at the time. It was a great excuse to do the research and learn about all the things I wanted to and use that knowledge without it being harmful to anyone.
I love cult content and I've just fallen into a munchausen by proxy podcast rabbit hole that feeds feeds the same little content goblin in my brain.
@@marlydyou should check out season 18 of the podcast “something was wrong”. I think you’d be fascinated by that story and it’s a rabbit hole I went down after getting on the munchausen train lol
@@Cashhhhew looks great, thanks for the rec!
yeah that's why it's a joke
That doesnt sound like a special interest. It sounds like hiding bad behavior behind autism, and its not ok. We're usually more genuine than NT people, in a manner of speaking, but we're human. We can be genuinely bad people, too.
I'm really hoping it was a joke! 😂
@@imautisticnowwhat With how people feel about open relationships today, I feel like its not. I feel really bad for the wife, my world would come crashing down if the person I married did that and then posted about it online instead of talking with me. Poor gal :/
I don't agree. I do agree that it's probably fake, but having a special interest in scheming sounds very much possible to me. That doesn't make it okay and I do think it is possible to steer your special interests enough to prevent you actually cheating. But the existence of the special interest sounds very plausible to me.
@@MissNoechen Honestly, you could turn it into a game with your spouse. Explain to them that you like coming up with schemes and make it clear that while you will be scheming, you don't have any intent on actually following through. Bring them into it by having them actively try and uncover your schemes, thus forcing you to actually try harder.
Naturally, it won't work in every relationship. I could see even this situation testing the bounds of your spouse's trust and potentially making them anxious and insecure, but it would be better then...you know...just cheating on them.
@@caseychupinski7553 You seem to have a misunderstanding here. Open relationships are about consensual nonmonogamy. Cheating exists in open relationships, too. And cheating on your partner has nothing to do with open relationships, in fact, most people in open relationships are usually very clear about communicating boundaries with their partner and keeping them.
One thing I hate more than any other is when Autism is used as an excuse for garbage, scum of the earth behaviour. Yeah, I am autistic too, but I was taught, and I learned that some things are just not done, no matter the reason. LIKE CHEATING ON YOUR PARTNER!!!
I almost think that I human better than “regular” humans because I studied and learned how to be a proper human. The regular flavor folks just assume they know what they are doing so they are so so bad.
Me I am genius level human from many years of study. I human best of all, which is why I surround myself with cats.
ugh same. i found out someone i was talking to on the internet who was showing major red flags of being a creep to me acutally has gr**med people in the past, and he always blames it on his autism!! the hell? im autistic and that doesnt make you a gr**mer!..
EXACTAMUNDO!!!
I'm autistic and I can't handle dogs for a variety of reasons, their eagerness for making loud noises and intense need for physical affection can be overwhelming. I've actually got a cat, her name is Ares and she's perfect for me. She's very reserved and quiet, she understands my boundary for physical contact (She'll curl up to me when I'm sleeping, or rest on the unused space on my desk so I can pet her while I'm watching videos), she's genuinely caring towards me (Every time I have a nightmare, I wake up to her sitting up and watching the room for me. One night I woke up from a terror and started breathing heavily, she pulled my blanket off of my face and sat on my chest until she could feel that my breathing had steadied.), I find her very easy to read in terms of social-cues, which is funny because I tend to struggle with social-cues a lot and most cat-owners can struggle to read their cats.
Also, Ares has a strange fixation with attractive women and horror movies, glad to know I've raised her well.
Would Aries like a friend named Liam? My little guy is the same. I'm disabled, we both had low back/pelvis major surgeries when he was a bit over 1 and recovered together. I'd help hip stretch his legs and he'd insist on grooming my forehead to reciprocate. Still does over 10y later. Whenever back pain, migraines, or depression are keeping me in bed he stays with me. We actually both have night terrors. He'll startle awake with a hiss all confused so I'll come ground and soothe him, then when I have one I wake to find him laying beside my back with a paw on my shoulder🥺 and when I am really anxious or sad I'll pet him and listen to his purring with my stethoscope! Such great grumbles to soothe the soul!
Give some love to Ares for me!
I joke that my pup has a ‘cat personality’. I too can’t deal with dog’s that need constant attention and who insist on lots of affectionate gestures, hugs and being right on top of you all the time. The barking at random things is extremely overstimulating to me and I didn’t realise how much that was a problem for me until I started to foster dogs and realised most of them just do not have the same personality as my pup.
She loves her own space and doing her own thing, doesn’t ever solicit attention and isn’t overly affectionate. I think I must have her well trained on the barking because if she ever feels the need to bark (which is rarely) she’ll go seek me out and do a polite little ‘boof’ under her breath first so I can prepare before she barks (by blocking my ears and cringing usually) 😂.
A lot of people who do not like dogs (like my family) actually get on really well with her and I think it’s because of her chill, ‘cat’ like personality. We used to go do social visits to hospitals and nursing homes and quite a number of the residents who were scared of dogs actually became great friends with her - I think because she wouldn’t go seek anyone out or ask for more attention or affection than they wanted to give. She has a very chill personality and her favourite activity is curling up on the end of the bed and ignoring you lol!
She was my first dog, before that I only ever had cats, and I think that’s why she and I just clicked so well.
I like wall art pets, lizards and fish and things that stay in a fun to make habitat ehich can typically be set up for if I forget to feed every day. And mostly I get pets that only live a few years.... So I don't have to worry if my interest changes
Dogs become sooo overwhelming to me, I grew up with only cats so I didn't really know what a dog was like completely. When I moved in with my partner and gained a dog, it overwhelmed the hell out of me for months until she started calming down more. She hardly barks so I'm glad about that, but when she does bark it scares me so so much 😭
The attention meter never goes down and she just doesn't have a limit, she's almost as big as me so I'm always struggling 😭😭😭 I do my best still because she's still a good girl, getting a cat has chilled her out somehow.
I also find cats extremely easy to "read". They're scared, they fluff. They're mad, they hiss or growl. They're happy, their tail goes up & eyes close. The only cat feeling that's hard to pin down is long term pain or illness, and that's because they deliberately hide it.
My case for dogs as an autistic person:
I really struggled with burnout during college after the big life transition and utterly failing to navigate the super intense social landscape (not diagnosed at the time).
Getting a dog totally reversed my spiraling mental health. Overnight I made a best friend who loved me unconditionally and didn't care how weird or awkward I was. I also stopped trying to impress other people and feel guilty about my social isolation. I didn't need anyone else's approval. It was totally freeing.
I finally had a friend who shared my hyper-sensitivity to smell and sound. Dogs can smell everything (and go very far out of their way to get a sniff). I saw the world through new eyes. It taught me to embrace my senses instead of trying to inhibit them. It freed me from being bothered by sensory stuff and to appreciate my senses. Back then I didn't understand it, but in today's language I would say it's something like building a sensory diet. By allowing myself to experience/focus on/analyze all the little sounds smells that I had tried so hard to ignore, it relieved a huge amount of energy drain from trying to pretend like those things didn't exist or didn't bother me.
I also struggle with self-care and hygiene, so I loved having a dog was just as dirty as me. Instead of being a dirty, smelly weirdo, I just became a "dog person". I also have difficulty with hydrating and eating regularly, and being responsible for another life forced me to be regular and keep a routine, which happened to be a huge benefit to myself too. He got me off my butt and out into nature, which became one of my special interests and led me to pursue a degree in ecology and conservation studies, and continues to be extremely important for my mental health and overall joy.
Dogs are consistent. They don't lie. They don't pretend. They don't mask. And they don't expect you to, either. Really sad to see so many haters out there. All the therapy, support groups, and accommodations can't come close to providing the support that my dog did for me. I just hope everyone can find something that helps them like Jack did for me. He really did save my life.
Nobody should hate dogs! It’s great your dog did so much for you! I’ve lived with dogs all my life but I don’t think I would personally be a great dog owner, but I don’t hate them even if they trigger my sensitivities. I don’t want dogs to “mask.” My family rescued a pit bull mix and it’s so great to see him open up to us and heal from his experience in the shelter.
This is so beautiful, thanks for sharing! My dog fell into my life right when I needed him and he's the most important thing for my mental health too.
This ^. I probably wouldn't be a live but for my dog.
well said and well played....i greatly understand Karra's intentions now.
This! I find that having a dog has made me so much more able to follow a routine. I *have* to get up and feed him at a certain time, I *have* to ger outside and take him on walks. It's literally forced me to see the outside world and has forced me to actually take care of myself. I have to care for myself, because if I don't take care of myself, then who will take care of my Riku? Plus I've also found that taking the time to train him has become kind of an interest of mine. I want to see how much I can teach him and how he learns about things. Really, owning my dog has been a similar experience and I'm glad someone else feels the same
The first one is saddening if it is not a joke. Would be feel very bad for the wife and also,, no more cargo liners :(
No way an autistic person would be able to carry out a social stunt like that repeatedly. That's a psychopath move, who are extremely socially adept, not an autistic person's.
thats not a special interest thats just a fetish.
hyperfixation of cheating on my… WHAT
test
drug test
test
drug test
test
About dogs being a sensory overload, I get that feeling a lot😭 I always thought it made me feel like a bad person for not liking them, like I don't hate them ok? But being around them makes me uncomfortable and the random loud barking noises in the street are painful to hear
You can train them to be quiet or get quiet breeds. I struggle with cats but am fine with dogs since they can be trained. I'm currently training my dog to be my service dog
This !!
Dogs are actually one of my special interests. We have three (an Akita, a Chihuahua and a Romanian Heinz-57, all rescues). They can be loud, but - even though I have a serious sound sensitivity - I see it as communication and a challenge to figure out what they're trying to get across. In most cases, when you understand _why_ the dog is barking it's pretty easy to get them to stop - whether it's because they're excited, or it's a threat response etc, and you can usually figure that out from their body language. As an aside, weirdly...while I can't fathom human body language, I find canine body language trivial to understand.
Same! I love dogs, it's become a special interest to learn everything about my dog. And I agree, once you learn dog body language it's easy to get the barking to stop. Glad someone else gets it
My boyfriend is a dog trainer and is autistic and he actually talks to me a lot about how dogs are very similar to autistic people and how they think and how they interact with the world as well as how they learn. The biggest issue with dogs is that a lot of their people don't know how to train them properly or they just don't have the time. Especially small dogs because people think since they're so small they don't need training or that they're a bad behavior is somehow less of an issue because of their size
When you talked about how you put on headphones for videos to be considerate, I went through a little mini-crisis of sudden self-awareness, hahaha! Oh well, I'll keep wearing headphones anyway, mostly so no one else perceives me. 😁
I have always done the same, but I definitely think there's no problem with erring on the side of being considerate! You never know if there *is* someone who is in the room who is sensitive to sounds. I have an acquaintance who I believe is also on the spectrum and he always listens to his videos very loud in public, and sometimes I just have to leave the room if I'm already a bit overstimulated because that video noise is just pushing me over the edge.
Accidentally offending people made me super polite and trying to be super nice. I discovered some people can still misinterpret me and that being too nice can look like a lack of confidence to people.
I can't handle small dogs. Larger breeds, I'm okay with, but small dogs, like my mom's Yorkie, their barks are so high-pitched and piercing that it truly is physically painful.
I dont understand how anyone can live with dogs like that
Really I can't stand big dogs they scary like they're so big they could kill you, smol and/or fluffy are better cause they're look less scary also, big dogs can be high pitched too (source I'm stuck living with one) he wines and my ears hurt
All dog barks trigger my fight or flight to the point where it's triggered by the sight of them which causes them to bark.
They're a real nuisance for me.
My rabbit is mostly quiet and my autistic ears are not bothered by him.
I don’t like “bull and terrier” breeds like “staffies”, “Am-staffies”, and pit bull terriers.
Most other dogs are fine.
Yes! This!! The certain high pitch yap of a terrier is unbearable! I had to stop being friends with someone because they got the darn dog😡😫 (The woman never left her house except to pick up her kids at school and so we never talked unless I stopped by her house. She never asked why I stopped dropping by to chat.🙄)
Note on barking dogs as an autistic person. Yes, it can be grating lol but there are solutions. One of my special interests is dog training and behavioral science. There’s two options:
1) get a breed or individual dog who is quiet. I have a golden retriever service dog. He is EXTREMELY quiet and only barks a few times when playing with toys or me. Shepherds/herding and livestock guardian breeds and terriers are prone to barking as their intended jobs are to move animals or scare things off. This is done using their bodies, their mouths (although the nipping is less popular today in actual working dogs), and their voices. They are hyper aware of their bodies and surroundings in order to understand where their livestock is in physical space (herding) or to see predators (guarding) or find prey (terriers). Smaller breeds are also more prone to barking, especially poms and chis. This is why I usually recommend Goldens and Labs or sometimes poodles or to just go to a shelter, speak with the staff, and observe the dogs. Even then, all dogs are individuals, so breed isn’t always a perfect indicator of the dogs future behaviors. With service dogs, they are evaluated as puppies and socialized in very specific ways to ensure greatest chance of success. Doing something similar with prospective pet dogs I think would be beneficial for all. Plus, the environment a puppy is raised in can affect reactivity levels: Is your house loud and boisterous? The dog will feed off that energy and likely be more reactive and vocal. Did your dog have a traumatic experience with a person or another dog? They may become reactive or aggressive as a fear response. I always say that all behavior is modifiable, it’s just a matter of how much work you want to put in and how stressful said work may be on the dog.
2) Train your dog the “quiet” cue and teach them self soothing behaviors and create behavior loops to common barking stimuli. I taught my last dog, a sheltie which are known for barking (and oh boy was he a talker), how to quiet by first teaching him to speak on command. Easy bc he barked at me just flapping my hands at him like a sock puppet lol. When he stopped the “speak” I’d say “quiet” is a soft voice and use the “quiet coyote” hand sign lol. By marking and rewarding this stopping of barking and associating it with me saying quiet and using a hand signal, he learned to stop barking when I asked. He also would practice self regulation where if he got too rilled up I’d cue him to his station or bed and relax. I would specifically associate this behavior to things that made him freak out. Ex. strangers coming to the door he’s allowed to alert bark and tell me someone’s there but must send himself to his station by the door and wait there until released. With my service dog, he sees or hears people at the door and is trained to go to the door then back to me (usually doing displacement behavior and grabbing his favorite stuffy on the way lol). Then, I either have him sit stay, heel, or “go say hi” to the door. If I don’t do anything, he just goes back and forth from door to me (and does a little wiggle dance) to try and get my attention until I give him a cue and answer the door.
My spouse and I just got a sheltie puppy a month ago! He is a lot for me, but we love him so much. Did you have any other sheltie training tips?
I have a lab retriever and he is the quietest dog I’ve ever met. I also have a special interest in dog training. My husband was worried about getting a larger dog when we finally got a house and I asked for a dog, but then he was ok when he realized that I was pretty good at training our dog. Though our dog is pretty good on his own too. We got him when he was about 10 months. He has been a good boy since the beginning and most of my training him has been the fun after the minimum stuff. He kinda boofs at anyone at the front door but it is not quite a bark. And when he is being too loud with toys I tell him “you’re being too loud” and he quiets down a little. I don’t know what I would do without my beautiful dog. He is the best
I was gifted a very shouty puppy and I trained it out of her very quickly because I can't cope with loud noises, especially if it's sudden. I taught her to growl quietly instead, because she mostly did it when she wanted something/heard a noise ect...she's allowed to shout if someone comes to the door or when we go outside and I give her the OK to get her shouting out of her system because she does still want to shout lol
My little lurcher goes for weeks without barking, and I taught her what 'fingers on lips' means for when she does. Saying that though, you can sometimes find us in the park barking at each other and running around.
I had a golden retriever as a kid and I genuinely heard her bark _once_
I relate so hard to the dog thing. They attack my senses
Oh and also animals are my special interest so it makes it extra weird when people find out I don’t like dogs. And the cat autism thing fits so much it’s really funny! They stim - purring, they have extremely sensitive senses, and they are very introverted and tend to not interact with people the “right” way
i love animals but i'm a total cat person, and my cats are always very affectionate with me. it's like they know we operate the same way and they really trust me because of that.
I love dogs but I couldn’t be a dog owner because I can’t stand a lot of aspects of their behavior, especially barking and licking.
I have 5 cats (and no regrets) and they are so stimmy! Petting them is lovely and listening to the purring or just watching them can really calm me down, they're just so peaceful when they sleep. Also one of them likes to lick my forehead and I know he means it as a nice gesture so I let him but I wish it wouldn't feel like he's removing the top layer of my skin
I hated growing up with them, they stink and are loud, i get so startled every time they bark, and when my mom got baby chihuahuas they jumper up on me, where so fast, hurt me with theire paws and made so many high pitched noises. The last straw was when my mothers dog destroyed my two favourite plushies i was very attached too.
I like cats so much better.
Re: the electric shocks as "training" - that shouldn't have been in past tense. It's STILL happening at the Judge Rotenberg Center in the US - ASAN's running a campaign called "Stop the Shock" to try and get the FDA to ban the shock devices, but it's taking a long time, with a lot of set backs.
Oh and "how do you cope with the barking" - by having dogs as a special interest. 😎 Seriously think I'm sensory-seeking with animal sounds.
Cat purrs are great, I must say!
@@imautisticnowwhat one of the best sounds in the world 🥹
@@kunibob2 hiiiii, I dogs are also my special interest!
@@dog_st4r yay, hi! Your username says it all. 💕
I just watched Crufts 2024 and I was wondering how many people in that place were autistic dog lovers, haha! I bet it was a higher % than the general population. 😊
@@kunibob2 yeah, it comes from the fact that Sirius is actually my chosen name (I'm trans) and I quite literally chose it cuz Sirius is known as the dog star lmao
Also I've never watched that show you mentioned? Is it good, shuold I check it out?
I had dogs all my life, most of them from puppies, and when they are growing up you can develop a close relationship with them if you comunicate in a way that is consistant and caring. If you "speak their language" they will know when something they do hurts you, like barking or jumping on you, and they will also let you know when they need to bark so you can let them out or go for a walk. I wouldn't know what to do without dogs in my life 😭
Fun fact, if you give the dog the stimulation it needs it won't bark incessantly. As someone who has only ever been able to connect with dogs and not people . Am ADHD lol. But barking gets me too but my dogs don't bark unless there is another dog. And one of my dog smells great, the other one... Not so much. But I love to cuddle my dogs
Same . I have a Labrador who doesn’t bark like at all . Only time he does is if he hears doorbell or some car passing . My aunts dog barks like mad when she comes over though and it can get quite annoying . And I do bellow it’s cause they don’t give the dog toys . She can’t have balls as she barks at them but they don’t give her like cuddly toys either as apparently she destroys them which I don’t agree with as that’s kind of the point . So I made it my mission a lot to keep buying that dog toys but they don’t give it her til I’m around . When she comes around ours she goes crazy cause there’s so many dog toys here compared to hers . Sometimes she’s allowed a cow toy they got her but yeah . she’s also a poodle so .
Some breeds are also naturally more vocal than others. I had a whippet mix and she hardly ever barked. On the odd occasion she did bark it would only ever be one single bark. Many sighthound breeds tend to be quiet.
@@onyxstewart9587 Aren't sight hounds trained for solo hunting, though? Like, not alongside the hunter but to go rid of the vermin? Or do I have that backwards with blood hounds?
@OGimouse1 from what i remember, bloodhounds and coonhounds are traditionally either long-lead or free running, with their purpose being to track, flush out, or pin prey, and are thus *very* vocal about it, as it both scares the prey and alerts the hunter to where they are. (They also do it just because theyre excited lol)
Hilarious mental image, but true use, *corgis* being used by royals to flush out foxes.
Pointers and retrievers are less vocal, since they mostly focus on finding what's already been taken down.
Labs are fantastic jack-of-all-trades dogs, and can be used for most types of hunting if trained. I know most of the labs ive hunted with will whine in anticipation, bark maybe once or twice when released, and be silent the whole way there and back lol
Terriers, spaniels, and the like are often the hunters, specifically bred to get small animals like rodents. Terriers were prized in WW1 for hunting the massive rats that would infest trenches. Its always suprising to learn how many pretty breeds like spaniels were bred for hunting.
Thats a lot of knowledge, and i may have gotten some of it slightly wrong, but thays what ive remebered via osmosis from my mom being a dog trainer and my dad being a hunter for most of my childhood lol
@@onyxstewart9587Oh my gosh I have a whippet, and she's the same! Everyone is always so surprised when she barks, because she usually just stares into people's souls until they correctly guess what she wants.
I actually agree that dogs are stinky and loud. I wouldn't say I hate them (it's a very strong word), but I very much prefer cats. Even a louder more vocal cat does not bother me, but any kind of dog barking just hurts.
my most evil special interest was... shoplifting.
it felt like an extension of masking with remaining composed and everything while doing it, so it sort of came naturally to me. there was a lot of research and technique that went into it to avoid getting caught. obviously I stopped doing it because it's a dumb thing to do.
Your description of PETA was great, and the comparison to Autism Speaks gave me a laugh...as someone who has had to spend a lot of time dealing with people who support both organizations (quite vocally) I have to say that you are spot-on.
My neighbors have roosters and they recently caused me to have a meltdown after being kept awake for 24 hours - because of the loud crowing. They actually got mad at ME for leaving a letter about it in their mailbox. …because the letter wasn’t “friendly” enough.
It wasn’t friendly because it’s the third time in a year that I’ve had to discuss this with them. 🙄
I'm am joining this pro-smoothie anti-blender cult. You cannot stop me!
I just had a breakdown and this is helping my senses, thank you
Hope you feel better soon 💛
Much love and virtual hugs. I hope you feel better soon.
Take some time for yourself and do whatever brings you relief, I hope things calm down a bit and you feel better soon (◍•ᴗ•◍)
Cheating on your spouse is "against the rules" - Where's the autistic respect for rules? 🕵🏼♀️
I had a manger say she didn't like the fact that I flirt...! What? Im just playful. If playful is flirting, then I flirt with everyone. Why is this considered bad?
She was fk*ing the head manger of our shift, so I think it was more anxiety of being replaced. Which is creepy & grossssss!
We are an autistic household and we have a dog. She almost never barks. 😊
Same! Silent golden retriever for the win 🐶
Same! I'm always surprised when I dog sit for people and their dogs never shut up. But mine are quiet and I didn't even need to train them to be quiet. I think dogs match the energy of the household.
My chihuahua is quiet too. When I went to see her the first time none of the sellers chis barked at any point. So I think she learned being quiet from the other dogs she grew around. She only barks like once a day if even that, only when she wants something and i'm too spaced out to notice her quietly asking.
I bought a microwave with an option to TURN OFF THE BEEPING! Its sitting in storage now cuz I couldn't take apt living (& was having to take on more student loans to afford it, thanks to disability being poverty) & my parents got me a trailer to live in. It has its own microwave built in & no room for my beep free one, but damn I really loved being able to turn that effing beep off for the 6 months!
I LOVE huskies because they use much more vocal tones than barking which are quieter &/or lower in frequency. They also don't have the dog smell! If you learn about dog behavior &/or have one yourself, they become VERY predictable, too. You can teach dogs not to jump & most can be taught not to lick. I do agree most of the behavior complaints in the comments were due to bad owners.
Huskies are so pretty! But I live in the desert so I feel sorry for them here.
I have a phobia of dogs. They’re the worst. When my mom asked if I was ok with getting one, I put my foot down for one of the only times in my entire life saying we can’t.
But she looked really sad and kept asking so I eventually relented. I said I’d be fine as long as it was a smaller, quieter breed, and I helped doing research on which ones would be ok.
She found a dog I might be ok with, but when she went to the shelter to pick it up she saw one she liked more and got that one instead.
She’s big, loud, and jumps on me all the time.
She’s actually started barking at me RIGHT NOW AS I AM WRITING THIS. ☹️
It's not a phobia when the fear is realistic. Did she get a bully breed or something that looks like a pitbull? I hope not but sadly a lot of the dogs in shelters are of the more dangerous types. Being afraid of dogs like that is most definitely not a phobia but a realistic fear. Other big dogs can be harmful too but bully breeds cause the most deaths and serious injuries.
@@tenzingkittens8797 it’s called cynophobia. Diagnosed by a professional. Our dog is a mix and I’m not sure about the breed, but she doesn’t bite or anything. It’s nice to hear that I’m not crazy for being terrified of them. Thanks.
@@tenzingkittens8797I just want to clarify that most “pitbulls” you’ll find in shelters aren’t actually pitbulls but rather just look kinda like them. Also the stigma around them is not really true. They actually have one of the best temperaments of all the dog breeds the only thing dangerous about them is their bite power (when they do bite) and what happens when someone mistreats them or doesn’t train them properly, or when someone threatens their family (they can go from cuddly teddy bear to fierce protector in seconds when their pack is in danger). But really they aren’t much more dangerous than most other dog breeds (any dog breed can snap. It happens sometimes. Not with most dogs but it does happen). Actually, most of the sweetest, calmest, and gentlest dogs I’ve ever met were all “pitbull” type dogs. I’ve come across the occasional hyper one but I’ve never met an aggressive one and I’ve met many “pitbull” type dogs.
But yeah if someone in your family who you live with doesn’t like dogs you shouldn’t get one that barks and is crazy. That is horribly inconsiderate. Especially if they were willing to let you get one that wouldn’t bother them and you get the absolute worst dog for someone who’s afraid of them. Just wow.
@@implosive4065I wouldn’t say you’re crazy. I used to have a friend who was terrified of dogs because she got chased by one once. My sister used to be afraid of dogs (but that was because she was afraid of all animals after being scratched by our cat when we told her to stop what she was doing or she’d get scratched). Actually when she first met my dog Lou (this was years before Lou became our dog) I had taken her to meet Lou and Lou leaned forward slightly to sniff her and my sister ran away screaming and crying. She loves Lou now as well as our other dog Angel but getting over her fear of animals didn’t happen overnight. It’s funny cuz cats are now her favorite animal lol 😆 but yeah I wouldn’t say you are crazy. Some people just don’t like dogs. Also sometimes you get over it and sometimes you don’t.
But what your mom did was so inconsiderate especially since you had said you were ok with a calm dog that doesn’t bark a lot just to make her happy! That alone would’ve been a big compromise for you so she should’ve respected that and compromised as well! Instead you are the only one who had to compromise and that is totally unfair to you! I’m so sorry that happened!
@@rosepuppy1984 All bully breeds including pitbulls and mixes are very dangerous. When those type of dogs attack it's usually an intense long lastig deathly attack instead of just a bite like with normal breeds. It's NOT the fault of the victim when dogs attack. The attacks come out of nowhere and are unprovoced. If you don't believe me: look at videos of dog attacks and see for yourself. Please stop blaming victims for deathly dog attacks because it's definitely not their fault. Newborn babies are being mauled to death as well and babies don't provoke dogs.
I relate to my cat's pickiness. I am a menace in the cat food aisle by giving everyone around me anxiety because I thoroughly examine every can. The reason is because my cat doesn't like certain batches of the one type of cat food she eats (I think it has to do with the batch of gravy), and those all have the same expiration date. The average person doesn't know those cans have an expiration date. Meanwhile I'm like, "Nope, expires January 2026, she hates the January 2026 batch." She's going to try the February 2026 batch today, fingers crossed she likes it.
I’ve switched to bamboo cutlery. They don’t scratch up my tea cups, feel better in my mouth and don’t clanging against my teeth.
I love my bamboo plates and cutlery! I never connected it my sensory issues (just knew I liked the feel/texture) but this makes so much sense!
They’re not loud!
Unfortunately none of mine can go in the microwave and that’s when I tend to want to use those plates the most 😭
I don’t have any cutlery that is bamboo which now I’m thinking is a great idea!
I use my bamboo cups pretty much exclusively at this point.
I amazes me how many dog owners can’t comprehend that some people don’t like dogs. They’ll give a whole dissertation about why you should like dogs. Smh
I think it’s because they’re thinking of their own dogs, so they feel a need to defend them. I have dogs too, and I love them so dearly, but I can recognise that dogs are a sensory nightmare.
A lot of dog owners lack empathy for other humans. If you're not on their side, you're a "dog hater"
whenever i tell neurotypicals i don't like dogs they look at me like I'm a monster advocating for dog murder 💀 they're just not the pet for me but it's seen as, like, inhuman
It amazes me how many people have assumed I dont like dogs, when I love dogs (I'm not saying you have assumed that, I am saying people I have enocuntered in m own personal past have accused me of not liking dogs).
Info dump: I cannot mentally stand the sudden bark. I take your comment seriously and kindly, and apologies after posting and I edit to say, I dont do small talk well, so here's an info dump, I suppose, not really planning this out but typing as I feel what I feel.... I wish all those people who misjudged me wouldn't have jumped to conclusions about my like or dislike of dogs based on my body's painful reaction to the sudden noise. I try telling some owners I like dogs and they laughed as if I was lying, but I am being serious! I think dogs are adorable and life savers and amazing pets for other people!!! and amazing memory for me, I got booped on the cheek when a cancer sniffing dog noticed I got a benign tumor in my sinuses. Good girl.
The bark, especially the sudden sharp ones from the little pups, those sounds thrusts my body out of my control and I feel like someone else took the pilot wheel of my body as I witness my body bashing itself into walls. My head hurts, I wish people understood the damage from noises to my autistic brain, more than whatever hell I have been enduring due to ignorance in the makers of laws protecting their right to own an ESA near my apartment while I am denied the safety I need to avoid breaking my brain. I feel like I am worth less than a dog under these terrible circumstances. A miracle I'm still alive. I want the torture to end, but most people who can have the powers to do something, are choosing to ignore what I say to them, laughing at me as if I am a worthless crazy screaming lady... while they remain seemingly unaware that their own noises they bring into my living space is why I scream involuntarily. I'm tired of being mistreated by ignorance. Not a pity party, just blowing off steam with a mild hope someone will finally believe me and make something happen to bring back the peace I need. [sigh]
I know right! But no one bats an eye when someone hates cats.
Won't lie. I used to be a dog person 100%, but every time I've had one, I found it so draining and difficult to handle despite my willingness to train them, walk them, play with them, etc. I still like dogs a ton and don't mind them in short bursts, but owning a cat is far more compatible with me as a person. Plus, dogs tend to get really noisy in a way I can't stand.
Same, as a kid I thought I was a dog person because had only had dogs. My world was rocked when I got my first cat and realized that I could enjoy them way more than I ever did dogs. Visiting with dogs is cool but I know as a person I could never own one, it would be unfair to me and the dog because I couldn’t provide it the constant stimulation they need without getting overwhelmed and upset, they drain my social battery in the same way children do.
Also I cannot stand begging and being stared at while I eat, it makes me irrationally angry and I’ve never met a dog that doesn’t do that because people love feeding their dogs people food. (My cats rarely beg and when they do it’s on,y because they want a sniff not because they want to horf down my entire plate without chewing)
Same. I love dogs and really wish I had the energy to own one, but i vibe so much better with cats’ personalities and they’re almost no work. My cats are amazingly empathetic and always stay close to me when I’m having a rough day.
What dog breeds have you guys owned? To my knowledge and experience, noise and energy levels vary heavily by breed. I have a whippet, and she very, very rarely barks (like less than five a year), and outside of the zoomies she is a major couch potato. I mean, at this point she's old and mostly just sleeps and dissociates, but she's never wanted constant activity nor attention. She likes her space and her nap times.
I have to wear my noise cancelling headphones quite a bit during the day and play videos or music or ambient sounds specifically to block the sound of dogs barking in my neighborhood, so I really feel that post about sensory overload from dogs.
THE DOG THING AAA- I didnt have a choice in getting the dog. My 8 year old sister wanted one and she convinced my mom and dad, but I kept complaining saying that I hate dog’s barks and how they jump on you and smell bad. They ofc got it anyway thinking “oh you’ll fall in love with it over time.” but No. I’ve had this dog in my house with me for 7 years now and I still have meltdowns whenever she’s near me and my family just tells me “she does that to you because she loves you, stop locking her outside and play with her for once” 💀
You lock her outside?
@@lif6737 usually no, because she barks at everything out there and i can hear her through the walls, but i lock her outside my room and plug headphones in and wait for someone else to get home and play with her, and i occasionally come out to let her go to the bathroom outside and then ignore her again after 💀
If you didn't want the dog it shouldn't be your responsibility to play with her. Your sister should be doing it. I'm sorry that really sucks.
I am the opposite. I wanted the dogs. I don’t regret getting them. I actually don’t mind them jumping although the barking can be grating sometimes (also depends on the dog, my big dog has a deep low bark which can be startling but isn’t too bad, my smaller dog has a much more piercing and loud bark that doesn’t sound friendly but is just her saying hi, my cousin’s dog has the scariest deepest bark I’ve ever heard (doesn’t help that she looks like a pitbull and with how many people think about pitbulls) but she is an absolute sweetheart and a total lap dog even though she’s not a small dog, and my grandparents’ little chonky black Pomeranian has this small bark that’s not loud or bothersome at all). I’ve just always found them easier to read and I love that they will love you unconditionally and won’t judge you for being “weird” like other people will. But hey. Dogs aren’t for everyone and I totally get that. I may not agree with the opinion that dogs are terrible but I get they aren’t for everyone.
I absolutely adore getting swarmed and licked to death by a gaggle of whip tailed doggos. One of the best feelings in the world of you ask me!
As someone who's autistic and getting a service dog, they can be trained to bark a lot less :) ♥It may take a while but it helps a lot!
It also depends on the breed a lot. Some are higher energy some are more stubborn, some are huskies.
My family had a bernese mountain dog. She never barked. She did whine when she was left outside and wanted to be inside with the people though. 🥺
My cat is ALWAYS by my side. Especally when i feel overwhelmed or have a meltdown. And sometimes i hate that he comes to cuddle. Sometimes i dont want to be toutched even by my cat!
Same here, except I always welcome being touched by my cats. They’re so sweet and empathetic. If I’m going through a rough patch, they’ll take turns sitting with me so I’m never alone at any point. Idk what I’d do without them.
BUT I LOVE DOGS
Seriously though I do get it. My dog is pretty intelligent and doesn't bark randomly, is well behaved, and I love how she smells actually. She helped me through a lonely part of my life so she is my pal. She is still a dog though, and will act up at unknown things at the door or other barking dogs which can trigger me quite a bit.
Glad it helped you but love for dogs is still cringe
Got the same, mine is pretty well behaved and I don't mind her smell at all. But she is naturally a bit anxious so she barks more then I'd like, and they're pretty high pitched. Still, I love her, she is my best buddy, and if having her in my life means that sometimes I get a bit overstimulated than I’d gladly take that.
If you have the time and patience, door training is a thing. You can teach your dog to stop barking on command or only bark once or twice when someone's at the door before stopping and redirecting their energy.
The dog smell is great. My big old dog’s head also smells different from my smaller young dog’s head. For some reason my big dog’s head smell reminds me of grapes and I’m the only one who thinks this. It’s a really relaxing smell! Also I love cuddling them when I’m overwhelmed! It’s so relaxing! Also my smaller dog’s ears are so soft like seriously so freaking soft!
At 3:20, I was reminded of a misunderstanding that contributed to my college roommate complaining to the RA. I would turn down the TV when she got a phone call. I was trying to be kind, so the sound wouldn’t distract her. She believed I was trying to eavesdrop. She also complained to the RA I slammed my drawers too loudly in the morning, but never said anything to me about it. I apparently had no sense of what level of noise vs quiet she wanted from me!
I put my headphones on when I'm using the blender, mixer, food processor, and the hair dryer when I'm drying my dog.
Your horns look so amazing! I love your videos so much, they're very binge-worthy
Thank you soo much! 💛
"Your horns look so amazing!"
Yes, they make her look horny.
6:53 Finally I feel validated 😭
The sheer _exhaustion_ of having to deal with dog owners who let their unleashed dogs bark at me, telling _me_ to calm down, saying _their_ dog is harmless. Or the first question after sharing the info about my fear of dogs always being "WHY, have they done something to you?"
As if it's too difficult to understand that someone could have a _completely natural_ fear of dogs!! 😮💨
It’s totally valid to be afraid or dislike dogs. Just like it’s valid or to be afraid or dislike cats or snakes.
As a dog lover, I too hate the owners that let their dogs roam free & don't call them over when asked to do so. By doing so they aren't only putting other people & animals into danger, they are also endangering their own dog. Those kind of dog owners are SO irresponsible and annoying. When it comes to the question about why you're scared of them, I apologise, since I am quilty of asking that from some folks, but for me personally it's actually kind of hard to understand why someone would be scared of dogs without some big story or smthing (dogs are my special interest). Doesn't mean that me (or anyone) asking it is "right" or like it is any of our business and I'm doing my best to learn out of the habit if asking that. But your fear is totally valid! And if I try to push aside my autism tinted glasses I can see why someone would be scared of them. Sorry for the rambling tho
@@dog_st4r fears can be irrational, but when I can't understand how someone is afraid of something I love (like deep sea creatures), I recognize animals can be unpredictable to even those who study them, and if rationally we know the animal won't or can't harm us, the "what if" can be a lot to handle. Sensory issues can also become a fear response were one may panic from what ever is causing sensory overload (in my option).
@@dead1097 oh yeah, I am aware of the fact that animals can be unpredictable, which is one of the reasons I despise dog owners who let their dogs greet whoever bc "they're so nice, they won't do anything". But still, thank you for explaining a bit further, I didn't even think of the sensory issues thing that much (I do acknowledge that dogs can be loud etc. But I didn't register that could be one ofthe reason)
@@dog_st4rI have a neighbor who is fostering multiple aggressive dogs. I can’t play Pokémon Go safely because I was badly bitten by one of them. In the state I live in they won’t make a person euthanize “dangerous dogs” unless they kill someone. I had to pay my medical bills out of pocket and I can’t really afford it. They had one of those “invisible fences” with the “special collar” and the dog still got me pretty badly. It’s a red nosed foster “razor pit bull” so it came from a fighting blood line. They won’t put it down because the rescue they are fostering with makes the final decision. And they won’t do it because they already have a “furever” home lined up for it.
I pity the person who adopts the dog not knowing it has a bite history. 😢
The one time i didn't worry about my actions affecting others was this past tuesday while cleaning. I admit tho, i did look up city ordinances about noise to make sure if someone did complain, i could defend myself with facts😂😂
I relate so hard to the blender thing because i also love smoothies but I'm not home all day so i want to make a smoothie at like 10pm and my neighbors have small kids and the walls are incredibly thin. But then again, the same neighbors like to argue loudly at 7am and 1am when I'm trying to sleep so maybe i shouldn't care
I like to troll my loud neighbors. Like in your situation, I’d “pick a side” and just join in on the argument through the wall. 😂 They’d pretty quickly get embarrassed and stop.
@@clicheguevara5282 LMAO that's hilarious!! I do sometimes bang on the wall and yell "oh my god", "shut up", or "it's always something to argue about" but not often. But also, I have listened to them and they're both shit tbh 💀 the woman is very immature and the man has anger issues
@@dont-worry-about-it- We’re laughing but I know how stressful that situation is. I’m sorry you have to deal with that. People fighting is actually a HUGE trigger for me, so I get your frustration for sure!
I struggle with vaccum cleaner screaming. I can't believe people use them without hearing protection, and it used to drive me a bit nuts living near someone who vacuumed every second day with a machine that had a really loud high pitched whine. Like, I'd put on ear defenders to protect me from someone two doors down across the street. It was evil. But then it stopped. And it true evilautism fashion I can't pretend to care whether it was the machine that died or the owner.
I hate vacuums I got an apartment with no carpet.
7:30 easy: dogs (and canines in general) are one of my special interests (I've had it ever since I can remember) and hearing dogs bark actually brings me joy (unless I am already on the brink of/already having sensory overload, then not)
Same for me. I love doggos so much. They are easier to read than people and also can be absolutely hilarious! They also just love you. They don’t care if you are autistic or have adhd they just love you! My dog Lou, before she went blind was also a bit of a nanny dog. Once my sister was sick in bed all day and Lou was in there all day with her only coming out for water, food, and to go on a walk! Also other times Lou never spent all day in there as she preferred napping on the living room couch but that day she just stayed on my sister’s bed with her! And my other dog Angel, when one of us is upset she goes and cuddles up to them! She’s the sweetest little baby although at times she is crazy! Once my mom was yelling at me and Angel wormed her way into my arms and just sat there! She is precious and there is a reason the 1st thing I said when I met her was “Oh she’s such an angel!” Now that was before she opened up and we saw her crazy side but I still stand by that! She hasn’t met a single person she doesn’t love!
Cats are ok and are actually my second favorite animal (after dogs of course) but they are super different from dogs. Cats are more particular about who they like (which I haven’t usually had a problem with as I’ve befriended many cats who weren’t the friendliest) but in general they are nowhere near as accepting as dogs.
My parents also joke I have a “doggy radar” as whenever there is a dog nearby I WILL find it 😆 I go on alert any time I hear what sounds like dog tags jingling and with my autistic hearing I’ll likely hear it before my parents lol
@@rosepuppy1984 I agree with what you said about dogs and your dogs' sound awesome! I don't have a doggy radar, probaply because I only leave the house without headphones or ear defenders when I'm walking my dog (she can sometimes be fairly reactive and I need to be able to focus on her and our surroundings), but I do have this thing when I see a dog or someone I'm talking to mentions a dog I either start analyzing what breed they could be and then go through what I know of the breed (mostly in my mind, but if I'm with someone else I might announce the dog's possible breed to them) or then I start asking the person who mentioned the dog about their breed (if they don't know I ask them to describe the dog) and then about the dog's personality, age, etc. My brain also automatically can find a way to bring dogs into EVERYTHING. Presentation about x subject? I'll find a way to mention dogs. Oh, we're talking about x country at geography? Hey, I know a dog breed or two that originated from there! I can't solve a math problem? There are 6 dogs that are the same size and 2 bags of food that needs to be split equally for them... and so on! And I don't even do it on purpose nor think about more than maybe 5 seconds (except if it's a math problem) my brain just... does it.
@@dog_st4r 😂 that is so freaking relatable
I have posted a few videos about my dogs. My mom often asks me what breed a dog is (sadly I don’t know every breed but I am pretty good at recognizing most). Once I was eating lunch and my mom came up to me and asked “Hey you know all the pitbulls in this neighborhood right?” I was like “not all of them but some of them, why?” And she said there was a brown and white pitbull looking dog walking outside without an owner and wondered if I knew it. I looked out the window but couldn’t see anything so I (stupidly) opened my front door and stepped onto our porch and suddenly saw a random brown-brindle and white pit-boxer mix who I’d never seen before was at the top of the stairs smiling and wagging her tail! I was just standing there in shock as she said hi to me and then just walked through the open door like she’d done it a thousand times before and I just started laughing and shouting that the (obviously very sweet) strange dog had walked into the house. When I came back in she was playing with my dog Angel! My parents came into the room and we gently grabbed her so we could look at her collar and learned her name was Harper and we called the number on the phone. So we then waited with her on the porch for her owners to come get her, we were petting her the entire time and she was super sweet! The next day when I was getting my dogs out for a walk I found a package of dog treats with a thank you note on the stairs! It was definitely a fun and interesting experience. My 1st UA-cam video was actually about that story.
Another time my sis and I were babysitting this girl who lives near us (absolute sweetheart we adore her and so do our dogs) and we took her to a nearby park and I was watching her when my sis came up to me and said that there was a dog. I looked around expecting to see a person walking their dog (they often go through the park) but instead I see a random tan chihuahua with no owner. I told my sis to watch the girl as I approached the dog, not knowing how it would react and I knelt down and stuck my hand out and said hi and called it to come and he just walked right up to me and I was able to pick him up no problem! He is very sweet for a Chihuahua! So I sat on a bench and looked at his tags and called the number while my sister and the girl were petting him. A woman answered and I said “Hey did your dog get out becau-“ and before I could finish she said “no you have the wrong number” and hung up. So I called my dad and told him what was going on and asked if he could come get the dog and take him to a vet and see if he was microchipped. (I almost forgot, his name was Pickle) While we were waiting the girl we were babysitting expressed her desire to keep him and she didn’t want to give him back to his owners 😆 but shortly after I called my dad a guy came and Pickle started wagging his tail so much so I let him go and he immediately went up to the guy. Apparently the woman on the phone was his wife 😆 he was indeed their dog. Unlike Harley I’ve actually seen Pickle since then and he’s even met my dog (they got along great) and his owner also apparently own another dog who I’ve met before, named Cowboy who’s also really sweet (he even wears a little bandanna it’s so cute!)
My old adhd doctor also had a Leonburger named Ary or something like that so once I saw one at the dog park and I instantly recognized the breed. I also noticed that he was a lot smaller than Ary (this dog was about the size of a Labrador) and apparently he was still a puppy about maybe 8 months old 😆 but still super sweet! I’ve met so many dogs!
@@rosepuppy1984 oooooh! Intresting stories! I should probs subscribe to you or at least check out your videos. Also my support family (I'm not sure if that's the right term in english but that's what it translates to from finnish) is made of two horses, two cats, two leonbergs and one weird grandma. The leonbergs are a sister and a brother called Tyty and Poju (tyty is like a playful/slang way of saying girl and poju is playful/slang way of saying boy so the names we'rent very creative but anyways) and Poju is "weird" in the sense that he doesn't howl - he yells. It's like a mixture of barking and howling or maybe one, looong, exaggrated bark? He also likes staying in snow (which isn't very surprising since the cold is probaply nive compared to heat because of his fur) like he might sleep there for hours and if you ask if he wants to come inside he just looks at you like "What? Why?" Eventually, he does get tired of being outside and comes inside though. But Tyty in the other hand... while she likes snow, she's like Ariel; she wants to be where the people are. Like she doesn't neccessarily want to go to pee outside unless you come with her, which isn't much of a problem since we have to go feed and take outside the horses in the morning and then bring them hay 3-5 times a day (they need 10kg of hay brought to them outside per day, and then they get one portion on evening/night and one portion at 5am from an automatic feeder)
8:00 Not all dogs bark a lot, there are even breeds that pretty much never bark.
Golden retrievers are one of those breeds. I tried to teach my dog to bark and she flat out refused to do it. I had to put buttons on the ground for her to press when she wants to go outside because she will not bark to get my attention. The only time she barks is if she sees someone she doesn't recognize in the house or knocking on the door.
Autistic woman with a dog here!
Like the poster, I am *NOT* a dog person, for very much the same reasons as in this video! Smelly, LOUD, pushy, barky, unpredictable, annoying, textural *nightmare* to touch!!
But, my partner (also likely autistic, but lower support needs and undiagnosed) really needed a puppy, so we got one. But, her breed of choice is a Whippet, which has proven utterly perfect.
Whippets don't have an undercoat, so they're really soft and silky, much more like a short haired cat than a dog.
They're also very 'binary', they're either sleeping or ZOOOM!, but their zoom doesn't last very long before they're back to snoozy again, which is much easier to manage than the constant demands of a more constantly active dog.
When we first got her, well, I'm not going to lie, it was a *nightmare* for a while, until she started to mature, but I had a brainwave at one point and started just literally treating her like a nonverbal Autistic child. "Okay, you're barking. I hate that, but if you're barking, that must mean you need something, lets run down the checklist of things you might need (hungry, cold, want pats/attention, exercise, thirsty, etc), until we find what you're trying to signal". After a while she started modifying her barks to be more obvious to us as to what she wanted and we kind of tuned in on better ways to communicate (eg, if I'm sitting in my computer chair and she needs to get my attention, she'll poke me with her snout rather than bark), and then from barking to a much lower 'warble' sound that doesn't set off any of my 'sudden noise' or 'sharp loud noise' sensory issues.
On top of that, we put a lot of effort into training her, teaching her not to bark, teaching her what she is and isn't allowed to play with. We even taught her how to emotionally regulate herself when she's hyped up, so she can calm herself back down (or be calmed down with two words and a gentle touch) even when she's *really* in a ZOOM mood.
The only time she barks now is when strangers are outside our yard, or coming up to our door, so that we all know that there's 'potential threat to the pack nearby'.
So instead of a coarse feeling, smelly, barky, sensory nightmare, we have an absolutely *adorable* puppy that frankly acts more like our two cats than a dog, who tells us what she needs without being loud, loves pats and snuggles, is really pleasant to the touch, and has brief, high-intensity play sessions that are fun for all of us =)
One of my favourite recent posts from r/EvilAutism was a video that called out a woman who claimed that "Autism will be 1 in 2 by 2025" and responded with a party.
I live with three cats and whenever there's a sudden loud sound all four of us go: "WTF IS THAT HOW DO I MAKE IT STOP"
I bark back, matching frequentcy, and intensity, until I have confused my dogs into silence.
When I sneeze my dog thinks I’m barking at something and joins in.
I do that with neighbors' dogs
@@soyevquirsefron990that sounds annoying but also very cute
With dogs, they do need to be well-trained for me to be able to stand being around them. As a child, I had an old chow-lab mix who would bark at strangers who came past the property boundary. He knew that when my mother or I said "Charlie, friend", all was well, so he stopped. He never jumped on me or really anyone, and the one time he bit someone that I know of, the person he bit took full responsibility because we realized he probably came from an abusive home (this is actually part of why we ended up with him; he was a stray who wandered onto the street, and along with the city having had at the time a 2 dog maximum for private ownership and the neighbor who found him already having 2 dogs, the neighbor realized that this was a potentially reactive dog who seemed to be better around women and children than men, and the neighbor was a man, I was like 8 at the time). He did tend to be quiet overall and pretty much only barked at people in our yard/driveway (never at people on walks, which is fascinating, I kind of wonder if he was well-trained then somehow passed off to an abuser or what, because he definitely showed psychological signs of past abuse but that's all we knew about his background).
I don't have a dog now but I want dogs in the future, and one of the big things I'm already doing (even with that being years in the future) is making note of things I need to put on the training checklist, and "quiet"/"friend" (possibly both, it depends whether or not the dog barks at times when "friend" wouldn't work, Charlie never did but not all dogs are my sweet Charlie) along with not jumping on people are big parts of that list. Setting up a good grooming schedule and properly potty training them are also huge parts of dog owning, my mom certainly didn't groom Charlie enough and he was an outdoor dog so I probably smelled of dog more than I thought I did (I hugged him a lot, he was sweet, he'd just stand there, tail wagging, while I hugged him) but potty training didn't really matter. I'm not big on the idea of a purely outdoor dog and I'm going to live in a far colder climate so I can't realistically expect to have a dog I don't have to properly potty train. I am hoping I can have a yard with a dog-door so that's easier.
All this is why I generally don't like little dogs, people rarely socialize and train them properly because "oh, isn't Fifi so cute when he's yapping up a storm, growling, and snapping at people? It isn't aggression because he's just a little ball of fluff! He can't be aggressive!" They treat their little dogs like dolls and it gets under my skin. I swear, almost every little aggressive purse dog needs to be removed from their owners' care and given proper socialization rather than being an isolated accessory. The poor creatures are anxious and it leads to aggression. It's honestly not their fault they're insufferable. That doesn't make it less true, but still. I blame the human, not the dog.
6:53 I have a weird love hate relationship with dogs. I can love them, but I can also hate them. I hate that they can smell, I hate when they bark at you from their yards, there’s one that jump scares me a LOT, another who is just always so angry and another that’s leash reaches BEYOND THE SIDEWALK which is so irritating. I have to walk INTO the road to avoid it. You never know if they’re going to bite or not. So I can totally understand this.
My God how I relate with the dog thing. I have never ever thought that I dislike them SO much for precisely the same reasons (-mauling) before I moved in with my partner, who has two. It's unbelievable
Was surprised about the dog one, because I love dogs so much. Whenever I'm in a room full of people and there's also one dog, I'll just be interacting with the dog the whole time. I also think they smell amazing (like dog) and don't mind the barking as much as many other loud sounds (including people speaking sometimes). The only thing is that one of my two dogs is pretty traumatised and sometimes when she barks, she doesn't really stop. Then I do get overwhelmed. But in general dogs are just my favourite animal, even above humans.
I am so happy I found people who can relate to the dog thing cause I just don't like them and get agitated by them
I actually eat cereal with a fork because I like it to not scoop up all the milk. But then lately I like to let rice chex get nice and wet and I eat them soggy... so it's a weird effect now it kinda cancels out :/
auti with a spin on animals & zoology here! i’d like to preface by saying i love every single animal, and just because one is more difficult to live with personally doesn’t mean i dislike it.
funnily enough, cats actually give me a far worse sensory experience than dogs. i’ve had both in the past but i currently only have two cats, and i’m likely never going to have another after them.
my babies are siamese mixes which have a reputation for being quite vocal, and their incessant meowing is MUCH more irritating to me than a dog’s bark - i think this is because typically barking is a responsive behavior to outward stimuli that you can effectively chime down with training, whereas cats will meow for any matter of reasons that aren’t always obvious.
things my cats do that make me want to pull my hair out as an auti:
• loud meowing in the middle of the night
• play-fighting, which typically involves lots of vocalizations, chasing each other, and generally being loud
• clawing under doors and trying to open them when they want in
• being incessant about trying to lay on me when i’m not in the mood! plus unwanted affection in general
• grooming. i cannot STAND the sound of licking and nibbling on fur. dogs do this too, but not nearly as much
• hairballs. not very common, but usually accompanied by a gross sound and mess to clean
• constantly getting into plastic, cardboard, and other items. i can hear the sound of a stray wrapper being munched on from the other side of the house because i’ve learned to pick it up so they don’t hurt themselves trying to eat it
• litter boxes. i don’t love the sound of litter being kicked around and my kitties are MESSY - far more than any dog i’ve had. i also have a hard time regulating litter cleanup, likely due to both the sensory element and having adhd which makes chores harder to keep up with for me
it 100% makes sense to me why an autistic person would love cats but be uncomfortable with dogs. i just have a different experience personally in that dog behavior makes me feel happy and comforted, and i enjoy the company of canines overall more due to their size, disposition, and energy. plus, downsides like their noise and smell can definitely be reduced with training and hygiene care respectively.
what i’m not a fan of is when generalizations are made about either species (ie. cats are better, dogs are better, one is autistic while the other is adhd, you’re a red flag if you don’t like one, etc.) because they differ quite a lot within their species, especially breed by breed, and i feel like a lot of people have misshapen views of one or the other because of such statements. every animal has as unique a personality as we do as humans, and i believe they should be treated as such :).
I've never ran across a cat I enjoy being around, but I've definitely run across dogs that I enjoy being around.
My wife and I adopted a chihuahua\terrier mix over a decade ago and at first it was terrible... The constant barking.
But after working for a few weeks, it was much better. After a few months, the only barking would occur when somebody came onto the front yard, which I prefer the notification 😅
Since it's a small dog, there's not a bad smell, so that's not a worry.
But, the constant shedding..... That drives me batty!
As for the neurotypical spectrum syndrome, I'm surprised they didn't bring up that neurotypicals can often look their age or older 🤣 from what I've observed / what has been talked about recently is that those in the neurodivergent spectrum will often look younger!
For the dog barking, depending on the type of bark depends on how I deal with it.
When it’s a friendly greeting bark or playful bark, my autism works in a way where it doesn’t hurt and I just bark back.
When it’s a dog with a high pitched bark I will try to distract them with something else (initiate play, show them what they’re barking at, something like that).
When it’s a deep bark though. . . Deep dog barks heal my soul. I love them so much. One of my dogs have a deep kind of chest bark and oh my god. I love hearing it. It’s the best thing. Obviously, if he’s distressed, I get distressed but when he’s doing attention barks or play barks I could listen to him all day.
I always listen to the song at the end and honestly love the fade out instead of it abruptly stopping ❤
I absolutely loved dogs and think my dog is the best boi in the world and never understand it when strangers don’t smile at him (rationally I know not everyone likes dogs though!). But yes the barking is nearly intolerable. My dog only barks when people buzz our flat or knock and thankfully I nearly live in AirPods so I just keep them in and pray the delivery person is quick.
I think pets are one of those things where you really have to own them to get it - like I don’t want children but I understand if I had one I’d see what the fuss was about 😂
I used to love dogs as a kid even if I couldn't stand their barking, I'd have to hide in my room if they didn't stop. Now I find their energy and amount of training needed overwhelming and the barking is unbearable. Watching a golden retriever bite my dad's face and refuse to let go was the clincher. I just don't have dogs now, but cats are perfect! I love having a fuzzy little guy who just wants to hang out with me, and if she is making noise it's probably because it's dinnertime or playtime, no senseless barking at a squirrel I can't do anything about.
Every household in my neighborhood has a dog and I'm so tired of constantly being barked at when I go take a walk outside
I have a dog but she was raised in a deaf family and realised that barking didn’t get her any attention, so she only ever barks if she sees something outside, but I live on the 3rd floor so she only barks occasionally. She also doesn’t jump on people or lick people and I’ve got used to the smell :).
These new horns are really neato!
Thank you! 😈
I loved the conversation about dogs and cats.
My friend who is autistic has a beautiful XL Bully. He doesn't jump up and rarely barks. But it's lethal when he blows off, lol 🤣🤣🤣
I would love a dog, but I don't think my four kitties would approve 😹😹😹
If you want a dog that doesn't bark a lot, look out for a Rottweiler. Most Rottweilers (unfortunately not all) rather growl and not bark because they want to alert their owners without alerting intruders or other "dangers". The Rotti on my avatar picture was a descendant of German police dogs (world champions of police dogs). She was more than 2 yo when she barked for the first time and when she barked it was just one and very low-key bark. Most of the time she only growled, a very low-key growling.
General rule: Bigger dogs bark less and not high-pitched which isn't as disruptive as the constant yapping of smaller breeds.
As an person who is a dog owner and is also autistic. I have always had dogs, my family had before I was even born. At this point I can handle normal barking but the whining barks is torture especially from my neighbors dogs who is really high pitched. Apart from that one thing I love owning dogs.
6:50 I live with people who have 2 dogs currently and whenever i'm trying to eat the dogs will stand at my feet and pant and I can always smell their nasty dog breath and it makes me so uncomfortable. I usually just take my food to my room and eat there to get away from them
5:57 Flight, Fight, Freeze, Fawn, Fade, Faint?
I got off Reddit a few years ago due to all the "real world" news leaking its way into my feed. But NGL, this thread almost makes me want to go back there.
Nice horns BTW.
I do have a dog, and I've never understood why most dog owners just allow their dog to bark. I've gone to great pains to train my dog to not bark unless he has a reason (only partially successful because he's a proud Chihuahua mix who thinks security is his job). When he does bark it does really trigger me tho. I guess this being an autism thing explains why most people aren't bothered by it as much as I am. Petting him is a good stim though, so I think it's worth it. I also grew up with dogs and it took me a long time to get over all the same things complained about in the vid, so I'm sure that affects my opinion there.
My dog Angel barks at anyone she sees. It can get annoying and we have tried getting her to stop but she’s just really friendly and we’ve also realized that’s how she says “hi.” She barks at other dogs and then whines when she can’t go meet them (it breaks my heart when her bark gets more desperate she’s like “I really wanna say hi! Don’t go!” And she sounds so sad). We still try to keep her from barking as much as possible and she’s gotten pretty good and quieting down when we tell her to.
Also we used to have an elderly neighbor who absolutely adored when she’d bark at him from the balcony. He would just wave at her and talk to her back it was really sweet! He moved out a year ago after his wife died so we don’t get to see him anymore.
Also do you have any tips on how we can train her to bark less? Would be greatly appreciated.
AAA! Yes to the extending accommodations to the rest of the world regarding noise/obtrusiveness/interference with the same intent of courtesy I would like others to display toward me (or anyone) that seems to go unnoticed, never mind reciprocated! . . . Or, as I call it, simply "being considerate". Which, it seems, is not something lots of other people seem inclined to be into. 🤷Awesome new horns, btw, Meg! Hope they are less head-pinchy than the old ones. 😊
My dog barks a lot and it is loud and stinky, but this little scruffy fella has also gotten me through some really hard and dark times. I used to be really scared of dogs before owning him, well...wary and nervous at least, but now whenever a dog comes up to me in public I'm *all about* giving that dog some scritches. I think ownership enabled me to understand dog behaviours better and become more confident in interacting with them in general.
Yes, they still are a sensory nightmare, even my own dog, so I'm glad to have my parents helping me with him, but it also helps that he's actually kind of cat-like in a lot of ways. He likes to do his own thing and be lazy. He doesn't like water or getting wet as a result of how he was kept before we rescued him. Idk, there's something about his character, and how sweet and cute he is, that more than makes up for the sensory stuff.
There isn't a lot that can be done in terms of barking, especially if it's a stubborn dog like mine, but if he's especially talkative we'll encourage him to howl instead. The sound still isn't great, but because it's something we're all doing together (yes, we howl with him) it becomes something fun and something we're in more control of, which makes the sound more bearable than random loud barks.
If I were to get another dog though, I'd either get a bigger dog because they tend to be more chill and their barks - when they do bark - are deeper thus a little less painful on the ears. Or I'd get a smaller, lighter dog for the ease of carrying them and washing them and such. Our current dog is basically a dwarf breed, so while he is small, he is very dense and very heavy which makes picking him up or having him sit on your lap for long periods a bit difficult and uncomfortable. He's also perhaps a tad too stubborn, which makes doing necessary care things very difficult. Little man will not let us brush his teeth or wash him very easily lol.
a lot of the time when dogs are lethargic it's because they're depressed - might need to take them on more walks or just get more enrichment (like playing) in their life
of course, it might just be your dog's personality, but it's a good thing to keep in mind
@@fiona9891 No worries, it's his breed primarily. He's a glenn terrier mixed with something else, and his temperament matches that almost to a T. He loves his walks and food. He's fairly easy to get excitable, he's just not a morning dog at all and loves snuggles.
That said, he came to us malnourished (back in 2017, he's doing great now) and is basically middle-aged, on the cusp of old man territory, so with his history, coupled with his age, too much exercise takes it out of him so it is a careful balancing act for sure.
I've realized that I've become less tolerant of dogs since I left home for college. My parents have 3, and I lived with the dogs for about 7 years. I only interacted with the dogs in small doses, staying up in my room most of the time. Vacations with them were horrible bc you can't escape dog duties, and they get even more wound up. They stressed me out, but I did get slightly desensitized to the incessant barking. Honestly, I have a dog training special interest bc it gives me control when I feel I have none, but gave up training them when my family became inconsistent with keeping it up. I love all animals and think dogs are cute, but now that I've been living without dogs, I really can't imagine living with them again unless it's a quiet and chill elderly dog. My parent's dogs listen to me over the rest of my fam tho, so there's that
I absolutely love dogs, but once I moved out of my grandma’s house with 2 big dogs, I realized I was literally *constantly* overstimulated by the barking (which wasn’t helped by the fact that some people in the household figured that the solution to barking was to yell every time they barked). I realized that I like visiting people’s dogs more than I like having dogs myself. That said, I could probably handle having a dog if I had better systems in place to handle their upkeep. In the meantime, I’m very happy to have a cat now lol
I’m autistic and when I was a kid, I really wanted a dog. It was mostly because I watched lots of cartoons that had cute dogs. I generally think dogs are cute, but I’m afraid of them biting me and them barking loudly. My dad and brother are also neurodivergent and they don’t like small dogs that bark a lot. My family has two cats and I really like them.
Well, I am a catmom since ever but there was tha wonderful dog I cared for parttime for two years and he did bark two times in this two years. And it was just a short "wooof". He was very scared on lightnings, fireworks, sheep😅, though he was a big black dog.
He was amazingly trained by his dogmum, also trained as a therapiy-dog. He was perfectly calm with my older cats from minute 1 on, polite as a cat-friend of them.
I loved him sooo much I want a dog like him.
But he was stinky, indeed😅
I’m SO glad it’s not just me that finds dogs unpleasant! Like I would never wish them any harm or anything, but it really annoys me when people are like, “OMG, don’t you think this doggo is so cuuuuuute!?!” No. It’s a predator that I’m convinced secretly wants to tear my face off. It barks and bites and farts and licks with its disgusting breath constantly, it jumps up on you and drags its claws all the way down your legs, either destroying your clothes or your skin, it leaves hair and stink everywhere, it humps you, it shoves its face in your crotch, etc. Just no.
7:25 I bark with them and go to investigate what they’re barking at
😂 Love it!!
I'm sorry, but I totally agree with the dog thing. There are some dogs that I like, but the majority of the time I avoid them like the plague.
One of my special interests is dogs. I’ve never had a dog, but have been in the dog industry for years (I’m 18). I can confidently say that I can read dog’s body language and reactions a lot better than people. I used to be jumpy with loud barking, but I guess I just got used to it. They can be stinky, drooly, and sheddy depending on the breed, but good training makes an amazing dog. Also, I plan on training dogs in the future.
3:52 if you watched ozzy Osbourne using a blender, i think your anxiety would go through the roof 😂
One of my special interests is dogs... and it's actually the jumping and barking and unpredictable behavior that drove me to get very much into dog behavior and training. So, my dogs don't do any of those things now! And I was going to get into dog training professionally so that others knew how to properly manage their dogs as well... but I couldn't stand working with the people, haha.
😂 i started putting hearing protection on to run the blender.
Same, that and those stupid air dryers in public washrooms.
@@enthiegavoir5955 i hate those air driers.
7:37 It's funny you mentioned barking dogs, because I was just thinking about noisy lawn equipment. Practicing meditation helped me view my own dogs barking as just another sound. Hope that helps!
Lawn equipment drives me CRAZY too. My roommate is cool and always warns me long before doing yard work. 😊 …but my neighbors obviously don’t.
i relate so hard to that smoothies comment. plus i cant make them after 9pm bc i'm afraid of angering my neighbours
The amount of hair my dog sheds sometimes feels impossible, that's another downside to dogs.
dog appreciation comment! audhd, i love dogs bc they're so pure & cheerful! i've never met a dog that didn't like me, but cats... cats, you have to win over. cats take work. (it's worth it, i am more cat person than dog person.)
That’s exactly why I love cats so much. A bond is so much more special when it’s earned over time. You should check out a book called “All Cats are on the Spectrum”. It’s about how cats are basically autistic. Lmao
Today on my way to work, I saw a woman with a dog. An Anbulance was about to pass and the woman and the dog stopped and howl at the siren together.
I grew up in a house with six dogs and I very much relate with this person s idea. I could never get anything done because as soon as I would start doing something the dog would need something so I have to break what I'm doing to do something for them. Definitely like cats more they get on me I can pet them very rarely do they actually need solid attention and once you learn how they naturally react it becomes substantially easier to read them definitely a cat person.
I'm autistic and had a pupper for the last 8 years (he passed two weeks ago) and I'm very, very lucky because he literally never barked. He did a bit when I first got him but I trained him how to a quiet symbol and he was quiet from then on.
I had a really hard time when he panted or made mouth noises though but I would just wear my noise cancelling headphones all the time and it would block it (I do that anyways). Overall, he was literally the most amazing and calm and wonderful dog and suited my autistic a$$ very well. But, I know I could never have another one because my sensory issues have gotten bad over the years and I know I wouldn't end up as lucky as I did with him.
And PS he was a rescue mutt, I would never buy from a breeder.
I am an autistic man .
Cheating on your wife has nothing nothing nothing to do with autism.
That's your personality not your neuro divergent diagnosis.
I don't think you understand what the user meant
@@saintdel895 maybe not .
But I do have an opinion.
I was not ready for that thumbnail
Every time I visit your channel I have to consider whether I'm just particular about things or if I need to seek out a diagnosis 😂 why are these so relatable??
Liking for the dogs suck section. I have a dog that we rescued because someone dropped him off near our house, he's mostly a chill guy that doesn't bark much (he only barks outside). But when he's excited about something he's just unbearable.