Ashens Valentines Special 2020
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- Опубліковано 5 жов 2024
- The horror of valentine's day once again ascends from the depths of Hades to annoy the living! Let us appease it with soft toys, weird greetings cards and all sort of gubbins in the hope that it leaves us alone for an other year.
Patreon is a thing that exists: / ashens
*'British man has mental breakdown on brown couch' -- 2020, Colorized*
But isn't that EVERY Ashens video?
@Kornel Szudrawski you're probably fun at party's!
Stuarts Neighbours: "What's that sound?"
Stuart (muffled through the wall next door): "DO YOU SEE!? DO YOU SEE!? DO YOU SEE!?"
"YOU SHALL BURN! BURN!" "FOR THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR REPAINTS!"
Your Friendly Neighbour where is it in the video
😂
I have a feeling that he's a Friendly Neighbour
When Ashens doesn't understand what it means to be blind o.O
Lobster is a reference to 'friends' when Joey reveals his true form in the finale and launches a crustacean based assault on America.
Joey was a wierd spinoff. It's easy to see why it wasn't popular.
That comment was the best laugh I've gotten from anything to do with Friends.
And it's up to the holiday Armadillo to stop him.
@@AllanElMelon1043 now I'm starting to wish they actually made this 😂
Dude spoilers Jesus christ
They thought "Bumble Bae" was clever, not realizing they really had created a "Bae Bee."
DO YOU SEE
🤯🤯
do you see?!
Do You See?!
DO YOU SEE?!
D O Y O U S E E ! ? ! !
that film annoyed me.
I thought it was a South Park reference.
FUCKING SQUISHABLE FUCKING AUBERGINE
Why kids love cinnamon toast crunch?
I’m stumped.
The kickstarter for ashens' therapy starts here.
fornaxian Stuart.
How much?
😂😂😂😂😂
Awesome Raptor Their just being funny.
@@ShiloAllard063 I know
guess we need a new series of Ashens explaining sexual innuendos then screaming "DO YOU SEE?"
* Insert a tiny phallus joke here. *
The screaming "DO YOU SEE" was a lot funnier to me than it should have been
Same here.
You know what?
Ashens yelling as if he is actually angry is one of the most distressing things in the world.
“Bloody fucking inflatable fucking crown!”
That's how he keeps fanboys in line
fr
One of his Halloween specials where he had a mock breakdown really creeped me out
@@rucu8311 which one ?
"I completely lost my voice but I think we just made it" 9 minutes later... "DO YOU SEE?!? DO YOU SEE?!? DO YOU SEEEEE?!?"
You’re my lobster is a friends reference “see he’s her lobster” - Friends Phoebe. - Also did you know Poundland we’re selling Valentines Day underwear....
Yeah the want and socks etc are really weird they have like chillies on it
Never been more disappointed in Ashens in my whole life
Yep Friends got a big boost when it turned up on netflixs or something and then there was talks of a sequal series or something like that so that phrase is out and about again
@@SamWilsonMusician Friends isn't really big in the UK, is it?
@@Magitek1112 it was huge back in the day
I love how his tone of voice changes from sarcastic to murderous and angry in 2 seconds.
"Do You See" he shouted, after speaking of his illness.
I think it's a disturbing reference to a Hannibal Lecter movie........ Had a very large man with a very large Dragon tattoo......
Obsessed over an equally large Dragon painting.....
Fucking weird movie in that context
It scared the bollocks out of me
@@user-st7rq3sn7v DO YOU SEE? THE GREAT RED DRAGON AND THE WOMAN CLOTHED WITH THE SUN DO YOU SEEE?!!!
* pulls love token "You Win The Argument"*, *recieves copy of the album "The Argument" by American post-hardcore band Fugazi *
i fucking love that band
SmittenTheKitteninMittens same heree
@@fr0ggi3princ3 and
@Candace Dugan...did you ever get to see them play?
Never heard of the album, but that’s such a distantly related subject that I have no choice but to upvote
I preferred Margin Walker
The font and color of the perfume made me misread it as "King in Yellow"
'Smell like the embodied herald of existential dread'....
DO YOU SEE?!
That's Hastur-arious!
Odor Over Innsmouth is my preferred cologne.
That stuff isn't just released for Valentine's day either that's always there ahaha
i got that for xmas
also it's not perfume, it's eau de toilet. which...is...basically the guys version of...
20 minutes in, the scent is shed
Gone, unsmelled, as love is dead
shown with King in million,
from Poundland
I'm going to set that first barrage of "DO YOU SEE?!" as my door-bell.
This only Valintines day celebration I actually look forward too
What about the lonely masturbating?
@@christonamtb4089 Overrated
@@christonamtb4089 You wait until Valentine's Day to do that?
It's the only valentines celebration you have to look forward to.
@@jacksonpercy8044 I'm a romantic person
8:55 a year and a half later, Stuart being uncontrollably mad is still extremely scary
“Your my lobster” is a reference to friends, Phoebe said “see he’s her lobster” about Ross and Rachel a reference to lobsters mating for life.
i think You're my crab rave would be more topical...lol
This, thank You.
Which is nonsense, since lobsters in no way mate for life, but Phoebe was insane. But yeah, Friends reference.
On behalf of all Americans, I'm sorry for this.
God that show sucked
"Do you see!? Do you SEE!? DO YOU SEE!?" Easily the sound of a new Dr. Who villain.
South Park did it
"Do not exist in a box" sounds like a dumb way of referencing Schrödinger's cat.
Nothing scandinavian exists
So the cat’s finally dead?
@@janicechristiedenton0451 Dead..... and alive.
Oldbatwit It is dead or alive, but it still spins me round like a record.
@@StefanEdek Droll, very.
"Don't attack the bumble bae."
-Ashens, 2020
"Have a picnic by a river" - appropriate, given that some folks have the river running through their lounge at the moment.
"There are no advertisment breaks
This is the internet"
Ashens, 2010
“If I was on television I’d be getting paid” also came and went
According to the television show friends, lobsters mate for life. "You're her lobster" is a quote from that show.
Might as well just go with penguins?
Ugh 😫
could it go deeper than that it could be from the movie lobster if you don't find a partner you get turned into a animal
@@Roadent1241 You have make the correct choice comrade
@@ComradePenguinski I meant penguins do the mating for life thing too, so....
DO YOU SEE? THE GREAT RED DRAGON AND THE WOMAN CLOTHED WITH THE SUN DO YOU SEEE?!!!
If you look at the reflective packaging in "king in a million" you may see a spooky demon.
Honestly there is so much reflective packaging in this episode that the demons are everywhere
Dozens of spooky demons in their spooky hats
"King in Million" sounds like a song Dieter Bohlen would write
"You're my lobster" is a reference to the dominance hierarchy exhibited in lobsters since the very early days of their existence as a species.
See, multiple factors contribute to an individual crustacean's success as king of the hierarchy, including physical size and aggressiveness. When one lobster challenges another, they'll begin almost a ritualistic battle of sorts, where they repeatedly aggress at each other until at some point, a claw latches on. If the weaker lobster refuses to bow out, he'll be met with severe consequences. It's not uncommon to see lobsters with torn limbs or eyeballs, or a cracked carapace. If the battle continues, the weaker opponent will be torn limb from limb and slowly killed. The oldest, most aggressive lobsters typically have plenty of battle scars, which more likely than not serve to weaken them over time in order to open a spot for a new ruler.
So basically, the toy is saying "I want to dominate you".
kinky.
i can't tell if this is serious or not but it's still funny
After doing some research "you're my lobster" seems to come from the old US show Friends.
And here I was hypothesizing that it was a sad attempt at a pun. Lobster as opposed to lover, you see.
god, so like a reference only like... 0.5% of the world would get? how stupid.
Yeah that's it
The fact you called it “old” makes me feel ancient, Thanks.
That show was apparently immensely popular but I've never met a single person who ever mentioned watching it
"It's a hundred percent polyester, as with everything beautiful in life." - Stuart Ashen 2020
I feel like Stuart is going insane with these bad jokes.
Mr. fallout ;(
He becomes ever closer to devolving into a Dalek with each one.
DO YOU SEE!?
8:57 yeah
@Sassy The Sasquatch I loved it, when he burned stuff with a blow torch or once smashed an object with 2 hammers like a real madman. That was the time, when good old Stuart behaved like a real UA-camr, but nowadays ... I'm sure he hasn't killed anybody in years
Valentine's Day
Nobody:
Ashens: "DO YOU SEE" (Screams in Dalek)
I always thought it was a Red Dragon reference :c
Well now this is slightly awkward for me since I got the misses the "I hate valentines day but I love you" card since I thought it was amusing and now it appears in the Ashens Valentines tat video.
It did get a relatively glowing review.
Tell her its certified by the most british sounding hands in the world
Ashens recieved it and that's why it's in the vid
@@Goresaka right so you give store fresh sealed cards to your partner nice very 'romantic'
Ashen's your gf? Wow
Ashens shouts like a crazy man.....
His Neighbours “Ah it must be random tat video time again”
Do you see? Do you see?! DO YOU SEE?!
I just wanna say I
i really want a photoalbum with the headshots of people who'd unironically gift their significant other a poundland gift basket
Entraya Crosshill it would mostly be college students
@@spinosaurusaegypiacus8028 My money is on old people and meth heads
"shred" isn't actually what's included, it's a suggestion for disposal.
ninjabuddy1 makes sense. You can also just burn it or throw it in to the sea in a concrete block. Or send it to the sun.
"You're my lobster" is a reference to the series 'Friends' apparently Lobsters mate for life, and at one point Phoebe shouts "he's her lobster" about Ross & Rachel
Ahh got there before me ha ha
That's what I thought so too. Honestly I'd rather get valentines lobster than a teddy
Wish i didn't know this now cause friends is utter tosh. The power of hindsight i guess.
@@KupariPlays my Fiancee bought me a "you're my lobster" mug for Christmas
@@gingerninja5449 aw that's sweet :)
Looking back at this starting to think Ashens had COVID
I hope “Do you see!?” Becomes a reoccurring bit
How about 10 hours of "Do You See????" :P
I hope not, I time was enough, then he did it more
I hope it doesn't - it activates my fight or flight response.
Like Antonio Stella Bottom Tile, some things should only be used in one video. (Yes, I know about the blooper video version of the violin video.)
Your my lobster is a phrase from the tv show friends
That's what I was coming here to say. Lol
Great, as someone who dislikes the valentines day craze and dislikes Friends even more, I hate the lobster thing even more.
A nice night out, or cooking something special for your significant other works fine! Been doing that with my girlfriend for 5 years now.
PS: I don't know what I hate more... Ed Sheran, or cheeky references to an old tv show that died out in 2004.
Are you here to argue with everyone just for the sake of arguing? Man... the coronavirus isolation really brings out the worst in people that have way too much free time.
I rest my case... You could have gone with an original comeback, but nah... back to childish insults about jacking off.
I do feel sorry for you, but can you go away and let me watch youtube videos in peace?
After the wooden frog fiasco, I really thought he believed it was an OXOX sign.
"I had a bad cold"
>Feb 2020
Oh... Oh Ashens...
"It looks like a minion. Or a yellow poo."
So - a minion.
British-English (French) to American-English translation:
Aubergine = Eggplant
Courgette = Zucchini
And now you know...
...completely useless information!
d0gZpAw Non, c'est plutôt intéressant...
'You're my lobster' refers to a thing from Friends. Phoebe says that Rachel is Ross' 'lobster', because lobsters hold hands and mate for life.
It's actually quite sweet! If the storyline of Ross and Rachel wasn't filled with lies, cheating and manipulation...
Except it wasn't cheating since "We were on a break!"
But yeah, they were so dysfunctional that it makes me wonder how long they would have been together after the series ended, before the inevitable break up.
It's a lie tho. Just like everything in that garbage show.
I would just like to put it out there , friends was only a show. Ross and Rachel and that on off scenario. ............alas , was only acting 🙁🙁🙁
@@boadazapher2846 I bet you're fun at parties
@@mordecaieagle4240 It was implied that they grew up and past childish issues and the relationship lasted
Can we get "Do you see!" on a T-shirt please.
I just started the video and I'm already disappointed that the bee isn't called the fucking "bae Bee".
I have found my people 😍 it's a bumble Bae bee 🥰
Bumble Bae is 100% a better pun than 'bae bee' tbh. Yours only makes sense if people regularly called it a 'bee bee' normally.
Aww ❤️
@@krablord tf you on about?
@@krablord Bae is pronounced like Bay. It's supposed to be an A sound. So it would be bae (ba) Bee (by). This might be a accent thing
Me at my eye exam
Eye doctor: DO YOU SEE? DO YOU SEE? DO YOU SEE? DO YOU SEE? DO YOU SEE?
I'm American and I never heard of Aubergine... We usually call those eggplants.
Princess Luna aubergine is the color of an eggplant.
Aubergine is what we call an "eggplant" in Britain, they're called eggplants in the US because they start off growing small, white and egg-shaped.
@@LucienHughes I'm American and I never knew that. It's probably because I don't really hang out with eggplants.
“Do you see?“ Dumbledore asked calmly.
jesus christ you really scared me with that SCREAMING "DO YOU SEE!"
Mr. Gloves does anyone need a hug?
Blind people:
Ashens: DO YOU SEE, DO YOU SEE, DO YOU SEE, DO YOU SEE,
I think "DO YOU SEE" needs to become a meme.
YES STUART I SEE. PLEASE STOP YELLING
"BAE" always used to mean British Aerospace. Best check the bee thing isn't a prototype drone.
Because there are types of Drone bees.
nowadays bae means baby in internet dank meme speak
@@KawaiiKaabii1993 BAE apparently means 'Before anyone else'
Hearing ashens pronounce "bumblebae" in a British accent is something I never knew I needed.
When I saw BAE on the bee I instantly thought British Aerospace! Ah the aerospace industry does funny things to your mind!
These specials always help with the annoyance of being born on Valentine's Day.
I thought it said "Touch my lobster".
"Go star gazing"
"Look! It's Simon Pegg, and he's slowly going mad reviewing tat on a sofa!"
But the real question is...
*DO YOU SEE?!?!?!?!?!?*
I'm blind
@@princegoatcheese9379 Unlucky m8
Ashens: My voice is hoarse today, sorry.
Also Ashens: (yells for emphasis)
.. … :
.. :.
No the real question is.....what the fcuk 😂
I got my wife one a similar lobster like that from Sainsbury's last year because we both thought it was very cute. Apparently it's some sort of reference to the sitcom 'Friends' which we both hate! But who cares, the lobster was cute.
The ox joke was way funnier than it had any right to be.
Thank you ashens. You saved me from my hangover because I see you're in more pain than I ever will be.
I'VE WAITED AN ENTIRE YEAR FOR THIS
That's sad...
@@heinzmueller7975 It's the second most reasonable thing I've ever read
Good, now wait for another year (or two, or three) for the next episode of Ashens valentine's Day special
No one:
The visually impaired:
Ashens: do you see?! Do you see?! dO yOu sEe?! DO YOU SEE?!!!
DO YOU SEE????!!!!!!
No because I find myself in a Dark Room.
He sounds like he is finally going insane
"You're my lobster" is a Friends reference. ya know. The TV show.
Yeah - there's been quite a bit of official merchandise for friends with the phrase available here lately for some reason. I don't know why Poundland tried their hand at bootleg merch but hey
kenkire isn’t there also a movie about “the lobster” where I guy has to fall in love or he turns into a lobster/
At least Poundland is keeping up with pop culture...of the 90's...
@@ellen7930 I have no idea about that one. I just looked up the quote on google. lol I didn't watch friends. lol
@@ellen7930 yes but that isn't remotely romantic, it's an art film with Marxist themes.
Turn that XOXO on its side and you’ve got a totem of skull and crossbones. So many uses!
Valentine's Day is kryptonite to Ashens' dead, cynical heart.
Lobsters mate for life. It might also be a reference to FRIENDS
"Bae" is just "babe" without the "b"
I can't tell if he really thought it was Korean
No, it stands for Before Anyone Else
In Korean, it means ship, stomach, or pear. Depends on context
@@amemelia or Be Available Every day
In Danish it means poop
It was not originally an acronym. The acronym came later to explain an R&B/Hip-Hop originated term to white people.
"Do you see?" Ashens said calmly.
I really thought bae was a made up Internet slang
ItsDylanHere i thought it meant before anyone else
I thought it was a reference to wannabe 'gangstaaaas' (especially stringy pallid white boys with excessive tattoos and backwards hats) who would slur their words in an attempt to sound 'high' and say 'babe' as 'bae'...
I refuse to give up my theory that one or more illiterates simply forgot the second B in "babe" and it just stuck somehow.
Yeah it is, but when it started getting popular I think people realised bäe (I think danish) means shit basically
same here
"DO YOU SEE?" is my new notification sound
The lobster is a reference to Friends, to be exact it refers to "The One with the Prom Video." episode in which Phoebe share her belief that lobsters mate for life and later Ross exclaim "You are my lobster!" to Rachel...
I loved the explaining of the joke on the skeleton mug.
"Board games night"
So a romantic night of "Diplomacy" then, favourite game of Henry Kissinger? How about "World in Flames", the WW2 game that lasts several days? Or "Textile Merchant, Norfolk Edition"?
I choose Acquire, which is a romantic evening of hostile takeovers.
accoutrements ... you got it right the second time 😊👍
Ashens has been my valentine since 2012
"DO YOU SEE? DO YOU SEE!? DO YOU SEE!?!?" New ringtone?
You're my Lobster is a reference to the show Friends.
Yup... Phoebe says it about Ross and Rachel... "She's your lobster"
"Tell her about the claws"
It's clearly a reference to the 2015 movie The Lobster
What an ancient reference to try and still make
Thanks for telling us. Ima just getting the pot and hot water ready
As ashens gets older he will get more and more dismissive, yet be oddly self aware about it.
*it’s valentine’s day and i’m sitting here eating pineapple*
Im so happy for you! Glad you found your soulmate
Are you allergic?
*it's valentines day and I'm sitting here eating Maoam sweets*
So you’re saying that you don’t feel bad enough yet with having no plans, that you had to further ruin your day by eating the abomination called a pineapple? Someone needs a hug...
Tiger DTG I agree :c
All this explaining of sex jokes is turning Ashens into a Dalek
February 14th, 2020 - Stuart finally succumbs to tat-induced insanity.
Most people would have croaked within a year, but not our Stuart.
F in chat for Stuart’s mental state.
DO YOU SEE? DO YOU SEE?
@@savant557 F
N T It’s hilarious!
You can still go star gazing if you can't see any at night, the sun still counts as a star
you're my lobster comes from friends. I knew a girl who had matching lobsters tattooed with her boyfriend! urgh!
That first one missed a huge opportunity: "Bae-Bee".
Time to escape my indescribable loneliness with tat!
X - looks like arms crossed = hug
O - looks like lips pursed together = kiss
or at least that's the way I've always understood it
Bae= before all else
YESSS ASHENS VALENTINE SPECIAL TIME I MAY BE TOO HYPED UP FOR THIS
"Do you see, DO YOU SEE, dO yOu sEE!?" I like to think these shouts have nothing to do with Valentine's day frustrations, he regularly shouts like that during EVERY review, and for whatever reason he just forgot to edit it out of this video.
Edit: 14:42 That seems like something you'd see in a sarcastic "An attempt was made" meme
The bae brand suppository, the ”I want to eat your insides with butter” lobster, and Enron's 2nd largest export. What a VD we've had together.
Bruh, it ain't VD till you catch VD...
"That was a joke because animes have a lot of episodes." Most don't, really. It's just the really really popular and well-known series that are drawn out way too long that do.
"That sounds like an anime as well, actually!" The newest sequel to Tiger & Bunny: _Cat & Potato!_
11:08 Barry?! Circa 8 or so years ago?!
Nobody:
Ashens: *DO YOU SEE? DO YOU SEE? DO YOU SEE?*
It reminds me of that line from Plan 9 From Outer Space: “Your stupid minds! Stupid! Stupid!”
Lobsters keep their partner for life, one of the few species that keep a mate for life. That's the lobster reference in a shell.