You're compromising wrong in your relationships

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  • Опубліковано 9 чер 2024
  • 👩‍❤️‍👨 My relationship course: psychologywithdrana.learnworl...
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 58

  • @AnaPsychology
    @AnaPsychology  17 днів тому +49

    I promise this is the last time I’ll be using this mic lol sorry for the bad audio quality

    • @raniaghrzl
      @raniaghrzl 16 днів тому

      Omg I thought something was wrong with my phone.

    • @DeLaSoul246
      @DeLaSoul246 16 днів тому

      I listened on a crappy phone speaker and thus didn't even notice the bad mic lol

  • @flowerchasethesunshine9063
    @flowerchasethesunshine9063 16 днів тому +43

    Also: Usually compromises are thought as both winning and losing same amount but I think compromises should be about BOTH winning if that's possible. Get to the root of your needs and do something that satisfies both of you.
    Example: One wants to go to a restaurant, the other wants to chill at home. Bad compromise is that they go to some easy basic restaurant. Good compromise is that they figure out that the thing that one really wanted is to have a culinary experience so they decide to cook something interesting at home.

    • @Sylkis89
      @Sylkis89 2 дні тому

      That's a bad compromise cause the person who wanted to chill will need to bust their butt out.
      Also, a difference between a compromise and a consensus is that in compromise both sides lose something, and in a consensus both sides get what they actually wanted, they agree on an outcome without *compromising* anything.

  • @jonathancangelosi2439
    @jonathancangelosi2439 17 днів тому +46

    My girlfriend and I have an inside joke. She likes to bite my arm a lot but I only dislike it a little bit. So “from a utilitarian point of view” biting my arm is the optimal outcome. 😂

  • @aleidius192
    @aleidius192 17 днів тому +50

    Value is indeed relational. A glass of water is worth more to a man in a desert than to a man living next to a reservoir.

  • @moonriversou
    @moonriversou 17 днів тому +44

    I'm anticipating what I will be learning as someone who over compromises in friendships.

    • @tiffanie.sparrow
      @tiffanie.sparrow 17 днів тому +2

      Hi friend. I'd suggest checking out where your have your boundaries. Even looking into Human Design

    • @moonriversou
      @moonriversou 17 днів тому

      ​@@tiffanie.sparrow whats human design?

    • @heyimSkyee
      @heyimSkyee 17 днів тому +1

      Yessss same

    • @waynepolo6193
      @waynepolo6193 17 днів тому

      @@moonriversou lol

  • @trio1000
    @trio1000 17 днів тому +45

    It's gonna sound like a broken record but this seems to be under the umbrella of communication being one of the most important aspects of relationships.
    When it comes to compromising for me, I try to give way most of the time just so I can have less pushback on the things I really do want. Say going on a trip, we have a list of a ton of things we all want to see and do. I say pick all the things you want but just for sure I want to do these 2 things

    • @Ilovesushi123456
      @Ilovesushi123456 10 днів тому

      That's a good strategy. Knowing what you want is really important in relationships

  • @kristofr6862
    @kristofr6862 17 днів тому +36

    Your cat is very stealthy. Didn't see it sneaking up in the couch. ;)

    • @AnaPsychology
      @AnaPsychology  17 днів тому +9

      I don’t even remember which of the two was striking mischief in this video but either way you are correct

    • @kristofr6862
      @kristofr6862 16 днів тому +2

      @@AnaPsychology As are in the cats nature. :) Carl von Linné did afterall name their species: Felis Mischievous Catus...

  • @stijn6286
    @stijn6286 17 днів тому +14

    I never looked at it this way, thank you

  • @Algo1
    @Algo1 17 днів тому +13

    I asked my girlfriend to rate how much she wanted something that was within my reach but kind of at the high end of it, she said a 100.
    I absolutely did it.
    If I can't, I can't and she knows it and doesn't push.

  • @gman854
    @gman854 17 днів тому +3

    Yes this articulates something I have been thinking abstractly outside of romantic relationships, I do things that don’t take me too much effort eg. Put aside a meal I already cooked and have leftovers for so they can have a healthy tasty lunch, like it doesn’t take me much effort by any means but it makes someone feel cared for, which means a lot to me.

  • @huntshunts
    @huntshunts 17 днів тому

    I never thought of it this way! Will definitely use this in my future relationships

  • @buttzpoopindowski6851
    @buttzpoopindowski6851 16 днів тому +3

    This is very clear and helpful. Thank you!

  • @genevievejohns4988
    @genevievejohns4988 16 днів тому +3

    This is such an original idea !
    Really got me thinking as someone with strong opinions on everything
    I agree with pretty much everything you say in your videos it's wild, so accurate and insightful
    would love if you made one on having selective mutism/similar conditions because it's hard to find info on it

  • @moonriversou
    @moonriversou 17 днів тому

    Thank you for this video because I definitely think this will benefit me.

  • @iga1720
    @iga1720 17 днів тому +7

    I love this channel. I have watched all videos.

  • @twopintsofmilk
    @twopintsofmilk 17 днів тому +3

    A simple to the point video. I like it :)

  • @nicadquartz
    @nicadquartz 13 днів тому

    I've never thought of this before! Very cool, thanks!!

  • @donalvarito3165
    @donalvarito3165 17 днів тому

    Nice, good info to examine my relationships.

  • @rhoda3704
    @rhoda3704 17 днів тому +2

    Great video!!! ✨ 🍄

  • @annap1171
    @annap1171 15 днів тому

    Good point!

  • @chancia8990
    @chancia8990 17 днів тому

    thanks for this video

  • @UnderworldGrim
    @UnderworldGrim 17 днів тому

    Thank you

  • @jjhassy
    @jjhassy 17 днів тому

    I like this a lot

  • @lars6314
    @lars6314 17 днів тому

    Very interesting :)

  • @yosoyroman875
    @yosoyroman875 17 днів тому +3

    I’m no longer in a relationship, but I will stow this away for another time🙂

  • @tee4678
    @tee4678 16 днів тому

    Nice

  • @mikesmith5159
    @mikesmith5159 16 днів тому

    Do you have any videos on relationships dealing with addiction? Or plans to make any

  • @marinaelliott8668
    @marinaelliott8668 15 днів тому

    Yeah, going to eat with my friends with dietary restrictions can be a compromise. Someplace like fast food might be off the table because it is 10/10 important I don't want my bestie throwing up or going hungry. But the importance of GF options might drop to a 2/10 if she realizes she isn't very hungry.

  • @jessicavictoriacarrillo7254
    @jessicavictoriacarrillo7254 17 днів тому +1

    Are you familiar with Melanie Hamlett?

  • @marcogutierrez2688
    @marcogutierrez2688 16 днів тому

    🙌🏼

  • @user-ob5ii2hj8i
    @user-ob5ii2hj8i 16 днів тому

    01:43 Dr Ana be honest with us . the couple you re talked about, was it you and your boyfriend (maybe your husband i dont know your situation)??🤣🤣

  • @paulrhyne4
    @paulrhyne4 14 днів тому

  • @amitshridhar
    @amitshridhar 16 днів тому

    🖤

  • @asafoetidajones8181
    @asafoetidajones8181 День тому

    Alright, fine. I'll compromise My way half the time and your way the other half.

  • @anivium4854
    @anivium4854 17 днів тому +4

    You want compromise? How's this: 20 years in the can...

    • @theaconite1400
      @theaconite1400 17 днів тому +2

      ?

    • @CardsNHorns04
      @CardsNHorns04 17 днів тому +1

      There were compromises within those 20 years, but then you reached an impasse that was not overcomable.

    • @jimfleece2880
      @jimfleece2880 17 днів тому +3

      Sopranos quote aha

  • @be1tube
    @be1tube 17 днів тому +2

    The person who puts a 9 or 10 on everything reminds me of the "utility monster" from ethics.

  • @andrewciricillo9726
    @andrewciricillo9726 17 днів тому +3

    Wow my ex really didn't understand how much I cared about laying around all the time and skipping chores, but she kept trying to get me to do chores!

  • @user-zo1tk5we3j
    @user-zo1tk5we3j 17 днів тому +5

    Or you could have alexithymia and get stuck in a toxic mind game with abusers.

    • @waynepolo6193
      @waynepolo6193 17 днів тому

      The good news is: these days alexithymia has many treatment options available!
      UA-cam doesn’t like hyperlinks so you can simply do a web search for the following headline! “Reversibility of alexithymia with effective treatment of moderate-to-severe psoriasis: longitudinal data from EPIDEPSO”

  • @tach393
    @tach393 16 днів тому

    idc if ur married get a divorce marry me instead shawty