I am the convert child of unbelieving parents. Now that I have children, I know I would be absolutely devastated if my children criticized my every move and way of life, so I always try to speak positively of my parents in the things they do well, and be loving and understanding of them in areas where we disagree (including faith).
Same here. I grew up in an abusive home. I have had to draw very hard boundaries with my mom, but I make sure I am very careful with how I speak about her to my kids.
It’s good to clarify this and talk about what a struggle it is .. I don’t know Elijah’s parents in person but they appear to be people that are loving and have humility. It’s very difficult to honor parents that undermine you don’t respect you try to laugh at you when you express your feelings and ultimately verbally abuse you . Coming from this perspective I have tried to fix my eyes on Christ because in the end I honor my parents to please the lord even if it doesn’t feel natural. I can look at Elijah speaking as see that he has something that is easier to honor so I can appreciate people that come from both sides. I believe what God asks us to do he graces us to do ❤
As an influencer try not to live up to your image as a get it all done mama. Sometimes you don’t need to get it all done and workout at 8 wks pp. coming (from a former professional athlete and ex marathoner I know it’s hard.). I only have 4 kids under 5 but can relate. There is a lot to be said for just settling into a season slowly without always being efficient. Not worth a mental breakdown. Maybe not putting so much pressure on yourself.
Wow what a great podcast. So wonderful to see a young Christian couple who love the Lord. I grew up in a Muslim household, my mom paid for my university education to become a teacher. I came to know the Lord Jesus Christ at the age of 28 through visions He showed me of going to church and now I’m a stay at home wife and mother and homeschool my eldest son! (God has blessed us with three boys and I’m so excited to see what else He has in store!) I have a lot of trials with my family as they are all unbelievers but God works all things out for good and I am claiming their souls in Jesus name! I also love and respect my parents! As our God Jesus said: “Forgive them Father for they know not what they do.” Thank you for the laughs and the wonderful encouraging Christian content.
Thank you guys for speaking on this! Your podcasts inspire me daily to live a Christian life in a practical way with strong convictions on most matters. This is a very difficult topic in mine and my husband's life because he comes from a single parent household and there is still a significant level of control that his mother tries to assert over him, but we are always in prayer about it and it is something we constantly work on. God has done a lot of work there but there are certainly still many challenges, especially when it comes to our children. Just posting this in solidarity with those who may have it harder when it comes to balancing the relationship with their parents in adulthood. Pray about it, God listens! I absolutely love y'all's work!
“I know it’s all possible” NOT with out outside help. Former homeschooling Mom of 8 here, and I admire you, your mothers, all of it. We are meant to have a village. I pray you stay strong, BUT burnout is real. Ask for support from family, peers, people from church. We NEED a village- so do our children.
Great topic to discuss. It’s also very timely I have been struggling to honor parents in my life. It’s a wonderful reminder that God often points out the places we’ll struggle. It’s also very true that culture gives us many many opportunities to blame our parents for an array of things but to heed God’s wisdom and rather continue to honor them.
I so appreciate all of your hard work and effort in bringing these videos to help and encourage us! I really do have to also point out we are called in the Scripture Jesus said He did not come to bring peace but to set a son against his father a daughter against her mother in Matthew 10. We are also called to separate and come out from among unbelievers . So if you find yourself in a position struggling in this area take all The Scriptures. Theres been so many people abused mentally, spiritually, physically, SAed, from parents who are struggling to raise their own children dealing with trauma, especially those in the Faith. I dont think we should ever dishonor our parents but at the same time we have to look at all Scripture.
Yes! And coming from the culture that Elisha, Katie, myself and my husband came from there is much abuse in the name of God. The primary leaders from our parents era built their teaching on fear which inevitably leads to control, which then leads to that being the only way a parent knows how to relate to a child, both as a little one and an adult. Thus many of us are actively dealing with spiritually abusive parents in adulthood so just saying if they’re if they are a professing Christian heed their instructions without any nuance brings more problems. Just because a parent professes to be a Christian doesn’t mean they’re actually living out the fruits of the spirit, are approachable, willing to take accountability, have other equals in their life who call them out, etc. the systems they followed to raise my generation didn’t even consider that, they just had all the rules for how to get your kids to turn out. Fortunately, myself, my husband and so many others have a lot of grace for our parents knowing where they came from, wanting to do what is best for us, and getting sucked into formulas. And fortunately some parents do evolve. But just because we understand where our parents came from and are willing to analyze how it impacts us (thanks to therapy actually- there are lots of Christian therapists out there who would be helpful to both parents and children who grew up in the world I did!!) and then take steps to heal, grow and change doesn’t just gloss over issues or magically make everything roses because our parents call themselves Christian’s. Just like the next generation that we’re currently raising are going to have issues with how we did things and ideas for how we can improve. I hope they’ll see we’re willing to listen and apologize. And most importantly, unlike myself and so many others of my homeschooling generation, I hope my children know they’re unconditionally loved by me.
Love hearing you two conversing casually, how couples do in real life! ❤ The banter brings life, humor, and authenticity to your videos. I’m also a big fan of the catch up portion at the beginning of your videos ☺️ Amazing topic as always!
I love the personal touch at the beginning! I’m also 8 weeks postpartum and trying to get back into my workout routine! It’s so hard to fit it in but really enjoying it so I want to get it in too!
My parents aren’t believers and I’m navigating honoring them as God commands while submitting to my husband and raising our three small children 3 and under. I appreciate what you and Elijah said here about honoring your parents and even a bit about honoring unbelieving parents though you come from a very different background than me! It is hard. Lots of prayer for sure.
Sounds like you all are dropping some serious hints about building a house! Contractors! Personal projects! Architecture! Good for you if it is that and good for you if it’s something totally different.
Thanks some really helpful call outs for me to ponder as the kid of Christians. So easy to focus on things I wish were different but I appreciate your approach of wanting to speak in front of your spouse or children respectfully even if you disagree, to still be kind with your words, tone and body language. Thanks.
Ps thanks for talking honestly about the struggle at the beginning. You guys are such ninjas at life it’s helpful to feel you’re also relatable and not just ivory tower living!!
This is so good and so on time! Im so grateful to the Lord for allowing the Holy Spirit to flow through the conversations that you two choose to share with us. I have been struggling very hard with the change of life my husband and I have felt convicted to go towards. I come from not the worst background in the world but my mother didn't raise me. I tend to hold lots of anger with her in my heart and my conversations with my husband about her and sometimes to others are not the most honoring. I pray for God to heal my heart, constantly, because I don't want to sin or lead others to sin, or look at my life and point out reasons to attack the faith. I am constantly critiqued for how my husband and I live and how we raise our children. It gets so frustrating because the advice is always worldly, its always about chasing money, and hardly uplifts respect for my husband or our household and decisions. It's taken until recently for me to side with God and just to pray and let go of the frustrations, but that easier in my head than in my heart, when I feel hurt by comments and critiques, that my mother just doesn't get. Long story made shorter... thank you for this discussion its really left we with a perspective shift and fresh understanding on the topic.
I actually really appreciate that your a normal person who finds things hard too sometimes lol you just seemed so perfect lol anyway I love to listen to your podcast I learn a lot every time
Im in a place where my husband and I want to be very intentional with our kids. My family trys to control what we do and treats me like a kid still. its very hard because they are manipulative nothing is ever good enough for them. That has really messed me up mentally so Im trying my hardest to protect my kids from that.
Yes you should absolutely honor your parents. But honor and obeying are not the same thing. You can honor your parents by being respectful and showing kindness to them. By living your life in a way that shows them honor and respect even if you don't make every decision that they would make. Edited to add: As an adult I mean. As a child it says that children are to obey their parents. So when you are a child you honor them by obeying and respecting them, but as an adult you honor them by respecting them and even if you disagree doing so in a loving and respectful way.
Woohoo, Spanish and French! Que bueno Katie, ojala que sigas tratando de aprender! I am fluent in English and Spanish and want to learn French and have our kids learn them all too. For what it’s worth, I’m using the Las Llamitas curriculum with my little ones. You can do it Katie!!
Also what cirriculum did you learn for french/ how long can you expect it to take? I'm curious. And what was your routine with using and learning these cirriculum. Sorry so many questions! I have 3 little ones and my plate seems full as it is. Any tips would be appreciated
This was a great discussion. Well done! I have a few questions which, I think, we often overlook because we are so bound up/ caught up in today's worldly culture. 1. Can you define 'honor' when honoring your parents? (This would mean a Biblical definition, where honor has been separated from obedience) (For example, is an unmarried adult child free from obeying. If so, where is that stated or assumed in the Bible?) 3. Please can you explain why the Bible says men... disobedient to parents (and not small children... disobedient to parents) "For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy,” (2 Timothy 3:1-2)" Thanks
I agree with the difference in honoring versus obeying. I have wondered about the verse that says children obey your parents, though. Is that talking about smaller children.
its called life life, lessen your expectations kids dont remember a clean house they will remember reading books and singing at bedtime eat cheerios grill chz wieners and beans and ice cream
My mom kept an extremely clean home, and it is something I remember and appreciate. I remember the playing and reading books too, but our home had such a calm and peaceful energy because it was always so clean and tidy. Even as an adult, a messy home makes me feel so scattered and like my life is in chaos. I do think balance is needed for sure. There are times where a perfectly clean home isn't possible, however, I do think it is something worth striving for. And you can include your kids in the process. I loved helping my mom fold laundry. And she would give me a duster and let me run around the house dusting. It was fun! We would listen to music and do it together.
Katie's nit picking Elijah on the podcast is getting awkward 😬 She often subtly let's him know she doesn't think what he's saying is relevant or succinct enough.
You don't know what she's thinking. You don't know them and how they treat each other outside of these hour long podcasts. Your making assumptions. However, if you are correct, think of where they are at the moment. 8 weeks postpartum and they are just getting back home from visiting family. They are exhausted. Give them some grace.
I'm not the only one that's noticed this?! It drives me nuts. His comments are not irrelevant and often have some good insight. It's not a good look for her to treat him like an annoying brother instead of listening to him with love, grace, and honor. He is her husband. He listens to her, so she should at least do the same.
I am the convert child of unbelieving parents. Now that I have children, I know I would be absolutely devastated if my children criticized my every move and way of life, so I always try to speak positively of my parents in the things they do well, and be loving and understanding of them in areas where we disagree (including faith).
Same here. I grew up in an abusive home. I have had to draw very hard boundaries with my mom, but I make sure I am very careful with how I speak about her to my kids.
It’s good to clarify this and talk about what a struggle it is .. I don’t know Elijah’s parents in person but they appear to be people that are loving and have humility. It’s very difficult to honor parents that undermine you don’t respect you try to laugh at you when you express your feelings and ultimately verbally abuse you . Coming from this perspective I have tried to fix my eyes on Christ because in the end I honor my parents to please the lord even if it doesn’t feel natural. I can look at Elijah speaking as see that he has something that is easier to honor so I can appreciate people that come from both sides. I believe what God asks us to do he graces us to do ❤
As an influencer try not to live up to your image as a get it all done mama. Sometimes you don’t need to get it all done and workout at 8 wks pp. coming (from a former professional athlete and ex marathoner I know it’s hard.). I only have 4 kids under 5 but can relate. There is a lot to be said for just settling into a season slowly without always being efficient. Not worth a mental breakdown. Maybe not putting so much pressure on yourself.
Yes I agree with this!! You have your whole life to workout 😂😂
Wow what a great podcast. So wonderful to see a young Christian couple who love the Lord. I grew up in a Muslim household, my mom paid for my university education to become a teacher. I came to know the Lord Jesus Christ at the age of 28 through visions He showed me of going to church and now I’m a stay at home wife and mother and homeschool my eldest son! (God has blessed us with three boys and I’m so excited to see what else He has in store!) I have a lot of trials with my family as they are all unbelievers but God works all things out for good and I am claiming their souls in Jesus name! I also love and respect my parents! As our God Jesus said: “Forgive them Father for they know not what they do.” Thank you for the laughs and the wonderful encouraging Christian content.
Thank you guys for speaking on this! Your podcasts inspire me daily to live a Christian life in a practical way with strong convictions on most matters. This is a very difficult topic in mine and my husband's life because he comes from a single parent household and there is still a significant level of control that his mother tries to assert over him, but we are always in prayer about it and it is something we constantly work on. God has done a lot of work there but there are certainly still many challenges, especially when it comes to our children. Just posting this in solidarity with those who may have it harder when it comes to balancing the relationship with their parents in adulthood. Pray about it, God listens! I absolutely love y'all's work!
Love love love Katie's spontaneity and vulnerability.... she's too cute. many mothers can relate. Thanks K
Katie, thank you for sharing real life. Elisha, thank you for being such a good listener and validating Katie well done. I enjoyed this podcast.
“I know it’s all possible”
NOT with out outside help.
Former homeschooling Mom of 8 here, and I admire you, your mothers, all of it.
We are meant to have a village.
I pray you stay strong, BUT burnout is real.
Ask for support from family, peers, people from church.
We NEED a village- so do our children.
This!!!!
Thanks for sharing your wisdom.
Great topic to discuss. It’s also very timely I have been struggling to honor parents in my life. It’s a wonderful reminder that God often points out the places we’ll struggle. It’s also very true that culture gives us many many opportunities to blame our parents for an array of things but to heed God’s wisdom and rather continue to honor them.
I like how raw and honest you are, Katie.
I so appreciate all of your hard work and effort in bringing these videos to help and encourage us!
I really do have to also point out we are called in the Scripture Jesus said He did not come to bring peace but to set a son against his father a daughter against her mother in Matthew 10. We are also called to separate and come out from among unbelievers .
So if you find yourself in a position struggling in this area take all The Scriptures. Theres been so many people abused mentally, spiritually, physically, SAed, from parents who are struggling to raise their own children dealing with trauma, especially those in the Faith. I dont think we should ever dishonor our parents but at the same time we have to look at all Scripture.
Yes! And coming from the culture that Elisha, Katie, myself and my husband came from there is much abuse in the name of God. The primary leaders from our parents era built their teaching on fear which inevitably leads to control, which then leads to that being the only way a parent knows how to relate to a child, both as a little one and an adult. Thus many of us are actively dealing with spiritually abusive parents in adulthood so just saying if they’re if they are a professing Christian heed their instructions without any nuance brings more problems. Just because a parent professes to be a Christian doesn’t mean they’re actually living out the fruits of the spirit, are approachable, willing to take accountability, have other equals in their life who call them out, etc.
the systems they followed to raise my generation didn’t even consider that, they just had all the rules for how to get your kids to turn out.
Fortunately, myself, my husband and so many others have a lot of grace for our parents knowing where they came from, wanting to do what is best for us, and getting sucked into formulas. And fortunately some parents do evolve. But just because we understand where our parents came from and are willing to analyze how it impacts us (thanks to therapy actually- there are lots of Christian therapists out there who would be helpful to both parents and children who grew up in the world I did!!) and then take steps to heal, grow and change doesn’t just gloss over issues or magically make everything roses because our parents call themselves Christian’s. Just like the next generation that we’re currently raising are going to have issues with how we did things and ideas for how we can improve. I hope they’ll see we’re willing to listen and apologize.
And most importantly, unlike myself and so many others of my homeschooling generation, I hope my children know they’re unconditionally loved by me.
this episode is so refreshing! Well the start just showed me that chaos is sometimes normal and others also long for strukture
Really helpful and needed. Thank you!
Love hearing you two conversing casually, how couples do in real life! ❤ The banter brings life, humor, and authenticity to your videos. I’m also a big fan of the catch up portion at the beginning of your videos ☺️ Amazing topic as always!
I love the personal touch at the beginning! I’m also 8 weeks postpartum and trying to get back into my workout routine! It’s so hard to fit it in but really enjoying it so I want to get it in too!
My parents aren’t believers and I’m navigating honoring them as God commands while submitting to my husband and raising our three small children 3 and under. I appreciate what you and Elijah said here about honoring your parents and even a bit about honoring unbelieving parents though you come from a very different background than me! It is hard. Lots of prayer for sure.
Sounds like you all are dropping some serious hints about building a house! Contractors! Personal projects! Architecture! Good for you if it is that and good for you if it’s something totally different.
So thankful for the authenticity 🥰
Thanks some really helpful call outs for me to ponder as the kid of Christians. So easy to focus on things I wish were different but I appreciate your approach of wanting to speak in front of your spouse or children respectfully even if you disagree, to still be kind with your words, tone and body language. Thanks.
Ps thanks for talking honestly about the struggle at the beginning. You guys are such ninjas at life it’s helpful to feel you’re also relatable and not just ivory tower living!!
This is so good and so on time! Im so grateful to the Lord for allowing the Holy Spirit to flow through the conversations that you two choose to share with us. I have been struggling very hard with the change of life my husband and I have felt convicted to go towards. I come from not the worst background in the world but my mother didn't raise me. I tend to hold lots of anger with her in my heart and my conversations with my husband about her and sometimes to others are not the most honoring. I pray for God to heal my heart, constantly, because I don't want to sin or lead others to sin, or look at my life and point out reasons to attack the faith. I am constantly critiqued for how my husband and I live and how we raise our children. It gets so frustrating because the advice is always worldly, its always about chasing money, and hardly uplifts respect for my husband or our household and decisions. It's taken until recently for me to side with God and just to pray and let go of the frustrations, but that easier in my head than in my heart, when I feel hurt by comments and critiques, that my mother just doesn't get. Long story made shorter... thank you for this discussion its really left we with a perspective shift and fresh understanding on the topic.
What a beautiful perspective you have. Praying for wisdom for you as you navigate this challenging relationship!
Thank you so much for this video. You are so right. Definitely feeling convicted about honoring my unbelieving parents especially in front of my kids.
and the example of Abraham is so good ! Helpful for us who were not raised in the faith. Praise God !
I actually really appreciate that your a normal person who finds things hard too sometimes lol you just seemed so perfect lol anyway I love to listen to your podcast I learn a lot every time
Thanks for continuing making these podcasts for us ❤
Thank you so much for being here!
Your selection of topics is awesome...keep up the good work...😊
Im in a place where my husband and I want to be very intentional with our kids. My family trys to control what we do and treats me like a kid still. its very hard because they are manipulative nothing is ever good enough for them. That has really messed me up mentally so Im trying my hardest to protect my kids from that.
Yes you should absolutely honor your parents. But honor and obeying are not the same thing. You can honor your parents by being respectful and showing kindness to them. By living your life in a way that shows them honor and respect even if you don't make every decision that they would make.
Edited to add: As an adult I mean. As a child it says that children are to obey their parents. So when you are a child you honor them by obeying and respecting them, but as an adult you honor them by respecting them and even if you disagree doing so in a loving and respectful way.
Woohoo, Spanish and French! Que bueno Katie, ojala que sigas tratando de aprender! I am fluent in English and Spanish and want to learn French and have our kids learn them all too. For what it’s worth, I’m using the Las Llamitas curriculum with my little ones. You can do it Katie!!
Is the ciriculum how you learned the languages? What would you suggest to become fluent? Thanks ❤
Also what cirriculum did you learn for french/ how long can you expect it to take? I'm curious. And what was your routine with using and learning these cirriculum. Sorry so many questions! I have 3 little ones and my plate seems full as it is. Any tips would be appreciated
This was a great discussion. Well done!
I have a few questions which, I think, we often overlook because we are so bound up/ caught up in today's worldly culture.
1. Can you define 'honor' when honoring your parents? (This would mean a Biblical definition, where honor has been separated from obedience)
(For example, is an unmarried adult child free from obeying. If so, where is that stated or assumed in the Bible?)
3. Please can you explain why the Bible says men... disobedient to parents (and not small children... disobedient to parents) "For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy,” (2 Timothy 3:1-2)"
Thanks
I agree with the difference in honoring versus obeying. I have wondered about the verse that says children obey your parents, though. Is that talking about smaller children.
Funny for some reason I thought this was in response to Jill Duggars new book 😂😂😂
Great topic love your videos you guys!❤❤
Who looks like that 8 weeks pp? With so many other kids too?? Crazy. I wish I was able to be that upbeat and productive 8 weeks pp.
Do you have a children’s Bible recommendation for a 3 year old?
I don't always think laying down your life means literally I think it means putting the other first.
Do u want 1 review or every podcast I don’t know how podcasts work
I think it’s a one time thing!
It's also good to let go abit so HS can do things for you
its called life life,
lessen your expectations
kids dont remember a clean house
they will remember reading books and singing at bedtime
eat cheerios
grill chz
wieners and beans
and ice cream
My mom kept an extremely clean home, and it is something I remember and appreciate. I remember the playing and reading books too, but our home had such a calm and peaceful energy because it was always so clean and tidy. Even as an adult, a messy home makes me feel so scattered and like my life is in chaos.
I do think balance is needed for sure. There are times where a perfectly clean home isn't possible, however, I do think it is something worth striving for. And you can include your kids in the process. I loved helping my mom fold laundry. And she would give me a duster and let me run around the house dusting. It was fun! We would listen to music and do it together.
❤❤❤❤
Katie's nit picking Elijah on the podcast is getting awkward 😬 She often subtly let's him know she doesn't think what he's saying is relevant or succinct enough.
You don't know what she's thinking. You don't know them and how they treat each other outside of these hour long podcasts. Your making assumptions.
However, if you are correct, think of where they are at the moment. 8 weeks postpartum and they are just getting back home from visiting family. They are exhausted. Give them some grace.
@@OUTOF.CULTUREI think she means aside from just this episode.
@@OUTOF.CULTURE its a pretty common dynamic if you listen to old episodes... I'm not a perfect wife either, I just have noticed as a listener.
@@OUTOF.CULTUREthis comment exactly 😅 seems she was just freely expressing her feelings which is a great thing!
I'm not the only one that's noticed this?! It drives me nuts. His comments are not irrelevant and often have some good insight. It's not a good look for her to treat him like an annoying brother instead of listening to him with love, grace, and honor. He is her husband. He listens to her, so she should at least do the same.