They Blocked You, what it says about them and what do you do next?

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  • Опубліковано 3 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 1,6 тис.

  • @hayleyhills5673
    @hayleyhills5673 4 роки тому +1080

    Who else trying to get closure and move on from a guy you never actually dated?

    • @lorahgeorge1235
      @lorahgeorge1235 4 роки тому +37

      Present 😂

    • @SpaceCadet4Jesus
      @SpaceCadet4Jesus 4 роки тому +21

      You never dated...at all.....and you need closure? How does that happen? I don't understand this.

    • @ladyzelda4323
      @ladyzelda4323 4 роки тому +53

      In my case I was best friends with him for 6 years... that’s how it happened.

    • @SpaceCadet4Jesus
      @SpaceCadet4Jesus 4 роки тому +3

      @@ladyzelda4323 thank you. 😀

    • @elsalopez8745
      @elsalopez8745 4 роки тому +3

      SJKHKJSBKHBAHVAHJ MEEEEE

  • @hourih2862
    @hourih2862 3 роки тому +564

    It’s very hurtful and childish. Especially if you know you are a decent person and there was absolutely no reason for it.

    • @eriktopdawg76
      @eriktopdawg76 3 роки тому +26

      Yeah it so frustrating

    • @ladyrose7015
      @ladyrose7015 2 роки тому +9

      Exactly

    • @emanuel_soundtrack
      @emanuel_soundtrack 2 роки тому +6

      total, girls……

    • @Nikifia
      @Nikifia 2 роки тому +20

      even more if that someone you blocked was your best friend, hurts

    • @-kizixvi9175
      @-kizixvi9175 2 роки тому +8

      well I blocked this guy, he was 23 I’m 12
      He was like “if you’re uncomfortable with anything please tell me” I wasn’t uncomfortable but it was weird how he kept wanting to see my face and yes I did show him
      Then he talked about how he wanted to see me irl and all, he asked me stuffs like if I’m into eh well those stuffs and all, he wasn’t creepy about it or anything but he said that the education you get in school is not good and I’ve suffered a lot from it and a lot of things
      He was a nice guy and I did tell him to stop being like that and he said “alright I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable”
      But I just felt like it was wrong so I blocked him
      Do y’all think I did the right thing?

  • @t.w.8174
    @t.w.8174 2 роки тому +613

    As a former blocker I can wholeheartedly say that every time I’ve blocked someone, it was because I was immaturely trying to hurt them because they’d hurt me, or I was avoiding hearing the truth about an insecurity that I have about myself. So if you’ve been blocked, know that it’s likely one of the two reasons I’ve mentioned ;) Take that information, reclaim your peace, and move on.

    • @vjcarter4657
      @vjcarter4657 2 роки тому +30

      I appreciate your honesty. I’ve only blocked people who were inappropriate about pictures I had of my daughter on my page or who were outwardly abusive to me. I was recently blocked or unfriended by someone I really cared about. I never thought it would happen, but whatever is happening in his world, has nothing to really do with me. It hurts, but it’s not about me.

    • @t.w.8174
      @t.w.8174 2 роки тому +10

      @@vjcarter4657 That makes sense. I’m sorry to hear about your friend. You have the right attitude, don’t let it get next to you. Bless them, sincerely wish them well and then move on. Interestingly, I’m going through something similar. A few weeks ago, a friend randomly stopped talking to me. I sent him a text pleading with him to at least let me know he is ok, and he sent a generic message back. Come to find out, he’s still talking to our mutual friend and just singled me out for the silent treatment-he and the mutual friend won’t disclose why. Unfortunately, the mutual friend has the sort of personality where he enjoys being the one who is still being spoken to/the chosen one. I’m about two seconds away from ditching both of them. I’m not a fan of emotional manipulation, and I’m certainly not going to play the “guess why I’m not talking to you” game.

    • @travelingman9
      @travelingman9 2 роки тому +48

      That’s exactly what my therapist told me. That I was being punished for putting my foot down and trying to stop the manipulation. I showed strength and she didn’t like it and didn’t want to hear the truth so she blocked me. It hurts.

    • @artinthegarage
      @artinthegarage 2 роки тому +19

      I blocked someone to get the toxic out of my life. Been 2 years and it’s worked great. In fact the person blocked only communicates when THEY need something. They didn’t even figure out they were blocked until they wanted some help from me.
      Sometimes blocking is just the absolute best solution.

    • @staceyangers9839
      @staceyangers9839 2 роки тому +34

      Or avoiding explanation and accountability

  • @kali4967
    @kali4967 Рік тому +83

    "Time will cure this situation"
    Time doesn't cure. Time just makes you forget.

  • @extremesoutherngal
    @extremesoutherngal Рік тому +75

    Whatever the reason, it’s not good enough. If you have to wonder why you got blocked, then they are abusive, plain and simple. Ghosting someone with no explanation (unless you’ve harmed them in some obvious way) is ABUSE.

    • @LifecoachAshleyBerges
      @LifecoachAshleyBerges  Рік тому +12

      I appreciate your observation and agree with what you're saying. If you never saw it coming and it takes you by complete surprise, it is wrong and abuse.

    • @Ncholasbloom
      @Ncholasbloom Рік тому

      @@LifecoachAshleyBerges thank you for that information so what that person did to me on twitch was abuse long story short you see my friend got invited to this game event and i was curious how she got invited and wondered if it was exclusive or local and boom i got banned although im only speculating

    • @Ncholasbloom
      @Ncholasbloom Рік тому

      @@LifecoachAshleyBerges she never gave me a clear cut reason as to why

  • @dancingcloud8557
    @dancingcloud8557 2 роки тому +210

    Yes! Let's please stop normalizing ghosting and blocking!

    • @ona8938
      @ona8938 2 роки тому +10

      Blocking is ok only if someone stalks you.

    • @archravenineteenseventeen
      @archravenineteenseventeen Рік тому +5

      just quit social media

    • @myownchannel1714
      @myownchannel1714 7 місяців тому

      @@archravenineteenseventeenOr just add, accept and follow the people you know in real life and you won’t get any problems. I understand that real life friends and family can do that too but still

  • @charaasmrbullsht8594
    @charaasmrbullsht8594 2 роки тому +161

    Blocking someone, especially without explanation or a warning is cruel and it leaves you in a torturous state of mind for months or even more! Its just sadistic in my opinion and I hate when people say its "ok" to block someone. Its "ok" only in some cases and also if you have warned them that you were going to block them if they continue with something, not just block you out of the blue, without explanation or after an argument. Its worse than a slap in the face.

    • @LifecoachAshleyBerges
      @LifecoachAshleyBerges  2 роки тому +16

      I appreciate your deeply thoughtful comment. Very powerful and I agree.

    • @charaasmrbullsht8594
      @charaasmrbullsht8594 2 роки тому +2

      @@LifecoachAshleyBerges Thank you, its because of personal experience, I had a friend who would block me when I started sharing with him about some guy who I was into, and also block me after I unfollowed him on IG and it just feels very bad, it makes you think about this over and over again, just wondering why and assuming.

    • @charaasmrbullsht8594
      @charaasmrbullsht8594 2 роки тому +5

      @@LifecoachAshleyBerges And also once after we had an argument he blocked me as well, even though he knew that this makes me feel upset. After that I agreed with him and did things his way cuz I was terrified of being blocked and he was nice for a while but then blocked me again after the next disagreement we had. That's why I came across your video, I just can't find peace and keep tormenting myself with questions and overthinking ever since. Lol

    • @ImTheNewFruit
      @ImTheNewFruit Рік тому +12

      True. Just be adult and tell me in the face you dont wanna talk anymore. And thats it.

    • @beautyintheskies
      @beautyintheskies Рік тому +1

      @@ImTheNewFruit Amen.

  • @cujo7778
    @cujo7778 3 роки тому +212

    The real conflict is within themselves

  • @wolfjaeger7
    @wolfjaeger7 2 роки тому +73

    Never forget, the person who‘s ghosting, blocking or just unfollowed you will have WAY longer to suffer as you do from the situation as they run away from these issues and are not confronted by it as you are.

    • @johnn.marshall4566
      @johnn.marshall4566 Рік тому +1

      💯

    • @DummyAccount-dr3fx
      @DummyAccount-dr3fx Рік тому

      In my case, I did something horrible to her, she is my friend that has been close to me for over 2 years she unfriend me on fb, and after 8 months my conscience knocked me over and over until I cant stop thinking of my bad words that I inflicted on her personality. This last September I proposed an apology (only the 2 of us) and I want to talk to her personally I want it to be a sincere apology because I dont like apologizing in chats or text message it seems dull to me and insincere. She said "yes" but afterwards she walked away!! I felt disrepected that time and I know that I deserved it. Today, she totally blocked me on fb. I really really want to apologize to her when I had the chance to talk to her but I cant seem to find a chance because I knew that she doesn't want to see me. I cant seem to understand that she waited for almost 9 months to block me I dont know whats the deal. I need help what to do now.

    • @1RiRi1_
      @1RiRi1_ 3 місяці тому

      @@DummyAccount-dr3fx-Update?

  • @logophile92
    @logophile92 4 роки тому +567

    I seriously despise this manipulative tactic. Whether it's coming from a friend, a significant other, or a family member. It's the most immature narcissistic trait, and if not that, just plain immature. I never block someone unless they decide to attack me, especially if they're a complete stranger. But when it's done to you by someone who is supposed to love and respect you, especially when you did nothing to hurt them or deserve being blocked, it's unforgivable. It's a sign that the person has no concept of communication or dealing with interpersonal conflict. Ultimately, it's a sad tactic.
    The best way to deal with it is not to respond. If someone doesn't respect you enough to communicate, even when arguing, then don't give them your emotional energy.

    • @jeremydixon8289
      @jeremydixon8289 4 роки тому +39

      This was very well said. Unfortunately this is easier said then I've been blocked by ex for 3 weeks now and I have to tell this is the hardest thing I ever had to do. And I literally can't eat or think straight. I just wish i knew what to say or do to win her heart back!

    • @denisechaoub90
      @denisechaoub90 3 роки тому +3

      So so true !

    • @arnellehardy1091
      @arnellehardy1091 3 роки тому +3

      Very well said ty 💕

    • @fartwell
      @fartwell 3 роки тому +32

      i've been trying to find people who share this sentiment. i believe it's a control mechanism, in the age of social media there's a real prevelance of emotional immaturity

    • @CandanceOnline
      @CandanceOnline 3 роки тому +1

      Amen 🙏🏾

  • @bradleslie3760
    @bradleslie3760 5 років тому +322

    Thank you. I love your no-nonsense approach and real talk. It is always about what you can change about yourself because there’s no changing anyone else, especially a narcissist. Being blocked hurts, but truly is a blessing in disguise. When this happened to me, I realized that the person I was involved with was incapable of having an adult relationship because developmentally, they had the mentality of a child. Good luck trying to reason with a five year old.

    • @boodiamante4567
      @boodiamante4567 4 роки тому +10

      I just got blocked now..no closure no bad arguements...just the best last conversation and all of the sudden the next day blocked on skype...I feel so bad and Im getting sick..

    • @erakkovaatainen148
      @erakkovaatainen148 4 роки тому +13

      @@boodiamante4567 Block him too, and live your life. Life is too short to waste on these people who couldn't care less about you with their peopleblocker job.

    • @boodiamante4567
      @boodiamante4567 4 роки тому +8

      @@erakkovaatainen148 I did and dont deserve to be treated like this...thank 8

    • @erakkovaatainen148
      @erakkovaatainen148 4 роки тому +3

      @@boodiamante4567 Amazing! I stay with bpd narc in nc too. He was a man from hell. Good to block because they keep lines open for a hoover. Take care!

    • @boodiamante4567
      @boodiamante4567 4 роки тому +1

      @@erakkovaatainen148 thanks Im really jot well right now..I just feel so bad about this kind of wrong doing...just sooo bad

  • @casperinsight3524
    @casperinsight3524 4 роки тому +141

    They can't love
    They can't handle the truth
    Once you know ask yourself
    Why are you trying to get blood from a stone?!?

  • @casperinsight3524
    @casperinsight3524 4 роки тому +135

    You cut your losses and block them
    Move on and never look back
    People show you WHO they are eventually
    Trust your gut Instincts initially to avoid this bumpy road from the get go, live and learn

  • @lmikosa
    @lmikosa 4 роки тому +311

    It was a long friendship and i ignored a lot of red flags from them- looking back i shoudve put down boundaries and ive shoudve been the one to distance myself from it.

  • @tobes911
    @tobes911 5 років тому +373

    As a therapist we always think they’re going to change, and they don’t. Feels good to walk away, doesn’t it?

    • @CarolDudeck-bl7kz
      @CarolDudeck-bl7kz 4 роки тому +5

      Not if it’s an ex Narc husband and you have kids involved!😡

    • @ivebeennicetoyou7482
      @ivebeennicetoyou7482 4 роки тому +7

      Does it

    • @IntheMOMENT22173
      @IntheMOMENT22173 3 роки тому +10

      But I didn't walk away...me an my ego got dropped like a hot potato.

    • @CompostWatcher
      @CompostWatcher 3 роки тому +5

      Yes. It does.

    • @tysm3255
      @tysm3255 3 роки тому +2

      My friend Blocked me Coz My Brother Msgd Her. I was Just Joking but she Blocked me I m Thinking Its all My fault. She was One of My Good Freind. What should I do now

  • @miriamb.9086
    @miriamb.9086 4 роки тому +132

    Thank you so much... I had to undergo cancer treatment and he blocked me.. I am still so hurt and your video helped me to cry for the first time for so long... Thank you.

    • @babyelephant5098
      @babyelephant5098 4 роки тому +11

      Miriam B. I will pray for you Miriam. Hope the treatment goes well

    • @miriamb.9086
      @miriamb.9086 4 роки тому +4

      @@babyelephant5098 thank you so so much 🙏

    • @ahanaroychoudhuri
      @ahanaroychoudhuri 4 роки тому +1

      I hope you're doing good my brave strong sister. Sending you tones of love 💞💞💞💞

    • @miriamb.9086
      @miriamb.9086 4 роки тому +2

      @@ahanaroychoudhuri thank you so much... I appreciate that so much 💕💕💕💕💕💕

    • @tiarshaharrison
      @tiarshaharrison 4 роки тому +2

      @@miriamb.9086 stay strong beautiful!!

  • @vaughangarrick
    @vaughangarrick 4 роки тому +141

    I was ghosted and blocked and then told by my ex it was the best way. It actually was the worst way having the complete opposite effect. I was denied my right to deal correctly with the break up leaving me in a state of torture and very confused and hopeful. It was cruel. And this was after they also cheated on me, the worst betrayal of a person's trust and love

    • @aarondesire
      @aarondesire 4 роки тому +32

      Vaughan Hamilton they’re coward. Period. Low quality behavior. Low self esteem

    • @vaughangarrick
      @vaughangarrick 4 роки тому +6

      @lolcano234 I suppose you're right but you can't really just dissappear one minute with no explanation. Are you coming back? Must i have supper waiting? So an explanation I think is the right thing

    • @christine4949
      @christine4949 4 роки тому +24

      Your are dealing with the mentality of an immature child. The person you thought you loved was never really there. Just a mask. To be cruel and callous to someone who you had a relationship with is just plain childish. Count your blessings or probably would have happened over and over. Always something over nothing. So exhausting.
      Love yourself and if it helps knowing was real for you. That has seemed to help me and don’t beat yourself up too much. We’re all human. Learn l,unfortunately that there are these reckless people out there who don’t care for other people’s feelings.

    • @stephenherrington3549
      @stephenherrington3549 4 роки тому +5

      She added her last ex back that she never got over and was commenting back and forth on a picture of a gift I got her. I called her out on it and she blocks me?? What does that mean?

    • @AdoptingBabyDragons
      @AdoptingBabyDragons 2 роки тому

      I feel this

  • @HiImAmazing123
    @HiImAmazing123 4 роки тому +132

    I'm confused and betrayed because I let that person come close to my feelings. Saw the red flags earlier, gave them hand to help them with what the cope. Suddenly had an argument, blocked.
    I reached them out after TWO DAYS with new account, telling them the truth. They were cold, told me they found someone new and blocked me again. Their loss.

    • @jb57551
      @jb57551 3 роки тому +11

      Hey, it will be okay my Friend, these people aren't worth your life!

    • @grank9090
      @grank9090 3 роки тому +5

      I hope it got better for you

    • @kzstube1900
      @kzstube1900 2 роки тому +7

      Same happened with me, they literally used me etc then suddenly for no reason they blocked me and to clarify the matter created new Id got blocked again with reverse psychology!
      Literally sad and it’s a pity they exist 👎🏾

    • @naslihanburak6065
      @naslihanburak6065 2 роки тому +1

      That's why I'm afraid create new account cause I be blocked again

    • @missrockstarglamazon6846
      @missrockstarglamazon6846 2 роки тому

      Never create a new account one your devaluing your self dither after they told you go F your self so rude ! And you scramble to build a new account we all know what that takes effort for their rejection ! They did it twice ! Kick that test to the curb ,

  • @danfloros4267
    @danfloros4267 5 років тому +240

    move to a new energy..attract higher frequency

  • @rivamarea
    @rivamarea 4 роки тому +304

    I was blocked because I asked for an explanation for the ghosting that was going on for 4 months, and spoke out my true feelings (now vanished) of love for this person, from my heart. Boom. They think they are kicking you away, but they are actually kicking themselves away from love they so so so badly desire.

    • @byhadeel5459
      @byhadeel5459 3 роки тому +10

      This.

    • @lamingtongirl123
      @lamingtongirl123 3 роки тому +25

      The probably just don’t like you. Have you thought about that?

    • @MsGenesisValdez
      @MsGenesisValdez 3 роки тому +19

      God this just happened to me. EXACT same thing. Just that he kept coming in and out of my life for 1 year.... Drunk texted me a week ago saying that he missed me, I come to find out he actually has a girlfriend. I got mad and explained that he has no respect for me whatsoever.. next thing I know.. he blocked my number and unfollowed me everywhere. Acting as if I was the one playing him. And just like you, my feelings have vanished now and I don’t want him back. But it makes me severely sad and upset that it ended like this. Because he’s trying to make me feel like I’m crazy.

    • @rivamarea
      @rivamarea 3 роки тому +12

      @@MsGenesisValdez Cliché this was so recent for you but time will heal. And remember, as Susan always says: you showed up to experience the real thing, he couldn't. So continue enjoying your honest, pure, beautiful self :-)

    • @MsGenesisValdez
      @MsGenesisValdez 3 роки тому +11

      @@rivamarea I was not expecting you to respond, thank you. I feel like complete s**t and it kills me that I will never get to talk to him again. And that he led me on like that. And that he’s making me regret telling him how bad he hurt me. Idk but, in my opinion, you block someone when they’re literally harassing you.. I never bothered him, he’s the one that would show up uninvited and leave. Acting like I was the one drunk texting him telling him that I missed him and wanted to see him (he really said that) ... And after I confronted him because I found out he has a whole girlfriend and he tells me that it was a mistake and is very happy in his “situation” (he called his girlfriend a situation)... the nerve. But I find comfort in knowing at least another person out there understands. So thanks for reading my rant. I can’t even talk about this without crying.

  • @MrHydevsDrJekyll
    @MrHydevsDrJekyll 3 роки тому +133

    And that’s it, real adults communicate. Immature ppl don’t communicate well and will block you via social media

    • @aurboda
      @aurboda 3 роки тому

      :(

    • @lamingtongirl123
      @lamingtongirl123 3 роки тому +11

      Somebody blocking you they probably have a valid reason. Nothing immature about that. Grow up.

    • @lamingtongirl123
      @lamingtongirl123 3 роки тому

      @@airjor1 no i blocked THEM. The worst part is they never messaged me asking why. So if the shoe fits.

    • @amandaaguilar7016
      @amandaaguilar7016 3 роки тому +20

      I agree real adults communicate with one another. I got blocked off from a guy that did not want to handle conflict.

    • @shakur509tupac6
      @shakur509tupac6 2 роки тому +26

      @@lamingtongirl123 only if there's harassment and stalking. Other than that there's no reason, unless you're immature.

  • @noemiaguilar1702
    @noemiaguilar1702 5 років тому +68

    Let it go things happen for a reason.

  • @nickchkheidze9189
    @nickchkheidze9189 3 роки тому +19

    The best revenge is massive success

  • @cass1124
    @cass1124 4 роки тому +48

    This is the most helpful & accurate video I've found about the last person I cared about. This person made me believe I was the problem when in fact, THEY ARE THE PROBLEM... that's what narcissists do. The top comment is "If this person is blocking communication, say thank you. The trash took itself out

  • @texturedtee2740
    @texturedtee2740 5 років тому +71

    You were right, there were red flags everywhere, thanks Ashley

  • @katehelene8
    @katehelene8 5 років тому +127

    The thing is, it wasnt after an argument. It was out of the blue. No explanation. No obvious reason. It makes you feel worthless as a friend because if this is how they see reasonable to treat you, is this a refection of myself? Having no closure sucks.

    • @erakkovaatainen148
      @erakkovaatainen148 4 роки тому +19

      You need to find closure on your own. Borderline or narcissist will never give you one.

    • @mikiaguirre6732
      @mikiaguirre6732 3 роки тому +7

      This just happened to me :/

    • @byhadeel5459
      @byhadeel5459 3 роки тому +3

      This...

    • @angeelee9277
      @angeelee9277 3 роки тому +14

      Block them back. Their problem not yours. Walk away and don't look back. It is their loss. Especially if it is family. Never mention it or bring it up again. They showed you who they are. Don't even givw them the satisfaction that you even knew or were hurt by it.

    • @Emmawow12
      @Emmawow12 3 роки тому +2

      happend to me before

  • @DayaTom
    @DayaTom 5 років тому +93

    Dodged a BULLET that was meant straight for the heart.

  • @kali4967
    @kali4967 Рік тому +44

    Getting blocked online is cruel and unnatural. We cannot block people in real life, you don't have that option. It's not in our design to block each other and erase from each other's life. It's artificial, robotic, and heartless.
    You can get a restraining order in real life, for legit reasons, but just blocking ppl left and right online because you don't like them/they have different opinion/they seem rude/they follow the wrong person/they said something that hurt you/they criticize you/looks too similar to your ex/hurts you to see them/don't know how to deal with them/makes you feel inadequate/ embarrassed/they're annoying/likes you too much/dislikes you too much - you don't have to block any of these ppl.
    You shouldn't surround yourself only with ppl who like you, agree with you, think just like you, and have the same interests. Now *that's* narcissism.

    • @LifecoachAshleyBerges
      @LifecoachAshleyBerges  Рік тому +6

      Very in-depth and thoughtful - I agree with your in-depth comment. I feel that blocking is not truly dealing with a situation properly. Obvious exceptions, however I do agree that when it comes to emotions and being truthful and honest about our feelings -we need to have communication, closure, and understanding- not blocking.

  • @kaleidojess
    @kaleidojess 4 роки тому +177

    It’s a very cowardly move. 🤔

    • @Luke-pd7xj
      @Luke-pd7xj 4 роки тому +16

      No not at all. That person might just want a break and blocking someone is very effective. They may realize that they don’t need the unnecessary baggage, especially if a person doesn’t have the capability to change. It’s pointless to drag out a friendship that was hardly meaningful to begin with.

    • @sectoid-with-internet-access
      @sectoid-with-internet-access 3 роки тому +6

      it’s not a cowardly move. what if an adult says they have a crush on you (and you are a minor)? is it considered cowardly or a right thing to do

    • @naomieleonora
      @naomieleonora 3 роки тому +1

      When your friends were so judging, no explanation-block them right away. Don't walk-run. No need explanation. Their learning process is not our responsibility.

    • @PeteS_1994
      @PeteS_1994 3 роки тому +16

      I agree it’s cowardly as it’s very passive aggressive

    • @20SG20
      @20SG20 Рік тому

      I agree. These are psychologically weak people. Laughing stock 🤣.

  • @Dragonfly657
    @Dragonfly657 4 роки тому +36

    A narcissist will never apologize they will destroy you. If you tell them no they will only Hoover too destroy you even more.

    • @rohanrajah8839
      @rohanrajah8839 3 роки тому +1

      Don't attribute any clinical terms. Just keep it simple. Live happily if something didn't work in your favor.

  • @katie12rose
    @katie12rose 5 років тому +298

    Why am I always the one getting hurt & blocked by immature guys who can’t man up? I miss him 😕

    • @parrisestatessouthernhomec3246
      @parrisestatessouthernhomec3246 5 років тому +3

      Katie Ericson I feel your pain. I miss my ex best friend an we tried to date an it ultimately ruined a 10 yr friend ship because I said she's 30 an mom an dad shouldn't be telling her how to live especially when she's been out on her own sense 18 an I've been on my own sense 17 we both divorced at the same time then tried to date funny thing is our ex's was our screwups an I think we blanked each other for their mistakes but before I could explain she totally blocked me out.

    • @SuperStrangSshadow
      @SuperStrangSshadow 4 роки тому +2

      Me too. Going through the same thing.

    • @SuperStrangSshadow
      @SuperStrangSshadow 4 роки тому +5

      @@assassinx6325 Thank you but it is not easy. I am a girl most guys doesn't show interest in.

    • @assassinx6325
      @assassinx6325 4 роки тому +8

      @@SuperStrangSshadow I am sure someone would love to have you!!

    • @assassinx6325
      @assassinx6325 4 роки тому

      @Aruba Aysha it could be anything really !! Tell me what exactly happened and what was said?

  • @tiarshaharrison
    @tiarshaharrison 4 роки тому +72

    She is 100% correct. Red signs were there & tired of people who are takers. I'm tired of playing games and going back & forth. So we both blocked each other. Idk why we got into the relationship and I guess that is more reason not to stay in it honestly. Time to be honest with myself & be around people who can actually communicate. I can't change them. I can only change myself. And yes I want to change the way I feel about it. Best one I saw so far. I am even taking a break off social media.

  • @heatherwhittaker6169
    @heatherwhittaker6169 5 років тому +52

    You do actually help to alleviate the pain by offering these videos..bless you Ashley.

  • @ms.r3367
    @ms.r3367 4 роки тому +40

    Anyone I've ever blocked was because they were a detriment to my mental health and well being.

    • @Cleonhide2
      @Cleonhide2 2 роки тому +3

      Lol

    • @rushrush1209
      @rushrush1209 5 місяців тому

      Some people are just not worth keeping in your life.

  • @danieljones7566
    @danieljones7566 4 роки тому +52

    OMG....several parts of this message really resonated with me. It hurts so very much to be cut off by someone you love, and because of this I just happened to stumble upon this message. Very helpful...Thank you for posting!

  • @clairep8
    @clairep8 5 років тому +49

    10 out of 10 for this one, exactly what I needed to hear and it all makes sense. Rose tinted glasses have well and truely been removed 😊

  • @josephschaeffer3403
    @josephschaeffer3403 5 років тому +30

    Ashley,
    Thanks so much for this video, as I recently have experienced this from someone I thought was a close friend. Basically, have just tried moving on, done my best to let go of the hurt and anger, and prayed for the person who blocked me.

  • @dip_emb_mexuk
    @dip_emb_mexuk 2 роки тому +12

    I broke down in tears when you mentioned that we needed to ‘forgive ourselves for letting this happen to us and letting them get too close and ended up hurting us’
    I know that my ex are not capable of dealing with any kind of conflicts. He is a busy successful businessman with so much work-related stress. So, when he said I was an amazing woman but I didn’t treat him right. I was so taken aback. I asked if we could have a proper discuss and tried to work things out, he blocked me and disappeared, out of my life just like that.
    I didn’t understand initially why he couldn’t talk and tell me what the issues were like most adults do. I just wanted to communicate with him and see what we could do to make it work. It seems he doesn’t feel the same way.

  • @deirdreimesonallen
    @deirdreimesonallen 3 роки тому +57

    I absolutely just dealt with that exact situation and it took me a couple days to realize that there was nothing I could do about it. The result was that she didn’t get to have me as a friend . so I let it go ignored her attempts to contact me, 2 weeks later, and I moved on. One of the best things I ever did

    • @tinytaigaaisaka2716
      @tinytaigaaisaka2716 3 роки тому

      👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

  • @SemperFi777
    @SemperFi777 3 роки тому +31

    Was friends with this guy for three years.
    Was always trying to be supportive and nice. Everytime we chatted everything seemed fine, happy even. Then out of the blue they just tell me to never contact them again, and block me when I ask if I did something wrong.
    And that's what eats me from the inside. That I do not know what I did wrong.
    I only have one thing left to say to him: Wherever you are, I hope you had a good reason. Because you took a piece of me and threw it into the ground, and I will never know why. Now I have to move on and get on with my life, because you decided to do the same without me.

    • @trevordaniels7857
      @trevordaniels7857 3 роки тому +9

      They’re a coward. You’re mature and carry yourself with dignity and self respect. Your value is higher than theirs .
      They probably found someone else and weren’t mature enough to even tell you they weren’t interested anymore. Trust me this will make you stronger. Don’t contact them again and level up . One day they’ll reach out and when they do you know what to do . I’ve experienced the exact same thing you’ve experienced.

    • @happyfeet8850
      @happyfeet8850 2 роки тому +2

      Motivate me guys 😭

    • @HisaLight2mypath
      @HisaLight2mypath 2 роки тому +2

      I'm in the same situation he just blocked me no reason

    • @davids9703
      @davids9703 Рік тому

      Bless you my friend..🌞...been there💯 ..these people aren't worth your time..live your best life 💞💞

    • @nannerz1994
      @nannerz1994 4 місяці тому

      Me too but it was 25 years and I'm only 30

  • @ashanaecarter8589
    @ashanaecarter8589 3 роки тому +30

    I love this. All the energy is in the right place. Exactly what needs to be heard

  • @elenasophia2246
    @elenasophia2246 6 років тому +65

    Dear Ashley, I've been watching your video's for a while and I absolutely love the way you talk! Your video's have helped me so much through my recovery journey from narcissistic abuse. I really think you deserve many more views and followers, your content is amazing!

    • @LifecoachAshleyBerges
      @LifecoachAshleyBerges  6 років тому +5

      Thank you for reaching out Fragoholica EN. I appreciate you and I appreciate your message to me. Let me know if there's anything specific you'd like me to discuss, I am thankful for your positive feedback.

    • @elenasophia2246
      @elenasophia2246 6 років тому +3

      @@LifecoachAshleyBerges Thank you so much dear Ashley! I really appreciate you took the time to answer, I would love even more video's about getting your confidence back after escaping a toxic relationship and spotting covert narcissism, especially in friendships, which aren't so common as in relationships. Last year I ended a 10 years toxic friendship with a covert narcissist and although I'm doing much better, I still have a long way to go in my recovery journey! Thank you so much once more, I really appreciate your hard work and the passion you put in creating these video's!

    • @wenshrigandy2621
      @wenshrigandy2621 4 роки тому +1

      Dear Ashley,,,thank you so much for this,,,maybe next time you can discuss about how to handle rejection from guys

  • @AprilMartinChartrandMS
    @AprilMartinChartrandMS 4 роки тому +24

    perfect support. Looking at patterns in our lives and seeing what part we play in the dynamic. Being a better version of ourselves and allowing for growth no matter how painful...is key.

  • @TMTgirl
    @TMTgirl 5 років тому +76

    It totally depends on the situation. If I know the person doesn't even care about my feelings, why boost their ego by telling them that they hurt you?!
    If they don't care and/ or are indifferent about you, it's a waste of breathe. If an egomaniac, then them knowing for a FACT that they had the power to hurt you just inflates their ego even more.

    • @SR77736
      @SR77736 4 роки тому +5

      Well said. They'll get their. Best to save your energy and detach. I had to learn this myself but realized they were not worth it. I drew verbal boundaries.so they know not to return.and left it alone.

  • @revenantsage
    @revenantsage 2 роки тому +16

    This was almost a life saver. Thank you for saying everything you did. I feel so silly blaming myself, when I know I did nothing wrong. I absolutely needed to hear this! 🙏🏼🙏🏼

    • @LifecoachAshleyBerges
      @LifecoachAshleyBerges  2 роки тому +3

      I'm glad you found and connected with this content. It was not your fault!

    • @revenantsage
      @revenantsage 2 роки тому

      @@LifecoachAshleyBerges 🙏🏼🙏🏼💚💚

  • @bigfamilyaffair
    @bigfamilyaffair 4 роки тому +17

    The reason I blocked my so-called BF was that he stopped communicating with me. I reached out to him via text and I received a 2-word response. I was hurt after not hearing from him 2 weeks prior to blocking him. I gave him the opportunity to at least tell me what happened or if he planned on dumping me. His MO is walking away, he has done that with others. He doesn't know how to tell someone that it's over. Silence is his way.

  • @MrFlamingpride
    @MrFlamingpride 3 роки тому +16

    It hurts when the narcissist who cut you off cuts you off from your entire family as well. My siblings can't text or talk to me, and they've all blocked me due to my mother's instructions. I hate being treated like a villain for nothing. And I hate having to go through holidays and events knowing I can't see them again.

    • @meggyharma
      @meggyharma 2 роки тому

      I feel you Omar I love you God loves you and sees you ♥️

    • @nannerz1994
      @nannerz1994 4 місяці тому

      For me it was my childhood best friend of 25 years who out of nowhere blocked me when I asked why she was ghosting me. Turns out her entire family did and had been ghosting my other friends parents for over a decade. The weird thing is she's an anxiety therapist

  • @trkskl9503
    @trkskl9503 2 роки тому +13

    All i can say, if they blocked you or deleted their posts of you both or whatever . Just ignore it, don't delete anything, don't block them or anything else. Don't go down to their level. It's hard ofcourse, but try to ignore it.
    Take this as friendly advice from a person who is really fighting through it at the moment. You deserve better.

    • @mamar5606
      @mamar5606 2 роки тому +2

      Im going through this right now..my bf just blocked me 3 weeks ago on FB, without an explanation 🙁..so confused

    • @ona8938
      @ona8938 2 роки тому +2

      Me too. If he cares, he will come to you.

    • @trkskl9503
      @trkskl9503 2 роки тому +5

      @@mamar5606 that means you've won. You're on their mind 24/7, otherwise, they wouldn't be "worried" about you that much.
      Just focus on yourself and your goals.
      hope things are going better for you rn, wish you the best.

  • @z.kuwait5277
    @z.kuwait5277 2 роки тому +11

    I gave a 3 year space to this person ghosted me to deal with her mental health and process her thoughts (it was a codependent relationship). I thought she was my “best friend”, and that eventually we can eventually talk and fix things. She kept getting more distant and yesterday she blocked me 😊
    I agree, we deserve better. Thanks Ashley!

    • @LifecoachAshleyBerges
      @LifecoachAshleyBerges  2 роки тому

      It's extremely difficult to deal with, I know it's tough on you. And yes we deserve better. Communication is key and when someone can't or chooses not too, we can only do so much.

    • @coolskunk6186
      @coolskunk6186 2 роки тому

      3 year space :o I kinda resonate with this.. its going 4 months of no contact for us, still waiting for her to realize 😪

  • @voiceofmoderation9810
    @voiceofmoderation9810 4 роки тому +7

    Another excellent video Ashley, thank you. I have a rule I live by in my life. I'm not a second class citizen. I'm not to be excluded or taken for granted. If people want to block or delete me online that's their business, but then I never talk to them again in person either and that's my business. If they have an issue they need to sort out of w me, they should have done that before the blocking/deleting (symbolic insult).

  • @JoyOgbatue
    @JoyOgbatue 4 роки тому +156

    For me I just want answers to why did they did what they did? That’s all!

    • @TheMaan2008
      @TheMaan2008 4 роки тому +13

      I would say they misunderstood you, they're easily creeped out, & there is because they feel you're annoying (harassing) them.

    • @ramoon9241
      @ramoon9241 4 роки тому +16

      I got you. It’s because they don’t think you deserve it. Make no mistake, no one is cutting people out of their life that they respect.

    • @TheMaan2008
      @TheMaan2008 4 роки тому +2

      Amore Beauty Based on my experience, at least. Most jump the gun

    • @TheMaan2008
      @TheMaan2008 4 роки тому +1

      Ra Moon It’s like “Never make a mistake” 😔😒

    • @TheMaan2008
      @TheMaan2008 4 роки тому

      Amore Beauty Yes. And something my brother would say 😬😅😂

  • @davidelias366
    @davidelias366 3 роки тому +40

    Thank you Ashley. This video explains my exact situation with a woman I had an on and off relationship with for years. I did everything for her. But one day I stood up for myself. I refused to be a doormat and sadly I blew up. Instead of talking it out she just blocked me. Although the first month was literally traumatizing I now feel much better and stronger.

    • @estherjoes5903
      @estherjoes5903 3 роки тому

      Dr Steve can actually help you attract someone you really love the most and want in your life. He once helped me and can help you too. Believe me I'm not bragging or trying to make unnecessary comment here, this was what really happened to me. he helped me attract (Jeremy) the guy I love and wanted in my life the most 💞💞☺️☺️💞💞

    • @estherjoes5903
      @estherjoes5903 3 роки тому

      Whatsapp him

    • @estherjoes5903
      @estherjoes5903 3 роки тому

      +2 3 4 7 0 3 0 8 9 4 8 9 2.

    • @beegsex
      @beegsex Рік тому

      I’m in the same boat. On again off again friendship. Our last fight, I ended up saying some things to her because of an age old argument. She’s blocked me off since. I feel I’m the narcissist though since the last thing she said was I gave her severe mental stress with all our back & forth.

  • @scott1105
    @scott1105 6 років тому +23

    This is the exact kind of thing that happened to me. In hindsight it was dealing with a narcissist ex. It is so interesting how their behavior is all so similar. This is a great video absolutely spot on!

  • @sarahhaywoodlifestyleedit7720
    @sarahhaywoodlifestyleedit7720 4 роки тому +37

    Dated him for five months but he told me he doesn’t want to commit. Blocked me on social media for no reason afterwards. Healing from a narcissist isn’t easy, but no contact helps.

    • @rohanrajah8839
      @rohanrajah8839 3 роки тому +2

      Sorry. Empathise with your trauma.

    • @ona8938
      @ona8938 2 роки тому +1

      I am dealing with this. Texted him. No response. I was stupid

    • @lilys9695
      @lilys9695 Рік тому +1

      I have a similar story like you. We dated for 5months as well and when we had the relationship conversation.
      And he blocked me on SNS as well and close his Instagram account after I contacted him there.
      It’s quite hurting. If he’s a real friend or he respect you enough he wouldn’t do that to you.

  • @ksmith4631
    @ksmith4631 3 роки тому +13

    Painful as being ghosted feels! One should learn to face the truth that we can't cling to people who don't want us. Nothing lasts, we should l accept and move on. Forcing closure out of someone won't solve anything if someone is done, allow them room to express themselves in a way that fits them. It has nothing to do with you most times. Yes your ego needs closure but unfortunately, some people are built different, confrontation is not their cup of tea and it is okay to just keep it moving. Peace.

    • @marvelculous8127
      @marvelculous8127 3 роки тому +2

      Hey, do you have any advice on moving on? It’s been 3 months and I’m still struggling

    • @ksmith4631
      @ksmith4631 3 роки тому +3

      @@marvelculous8127 Sending you peace and light... Everyone handles abandonment and detachment differently and I feel your pain. I really don't think it matters to ask how long you knew each other because an emotional attachment/bond to a person is not limited to time. If you have managed to come this far (3 months) you're doing great! Struggling to let go is part of the healing process. Another week, month, and year without them is NOT gonna feel as hard as it feels now. Allow yourself to grieve someone's absence for time is gonna comfort your heart into understanding that you were never meant to last for eternity with that person hence the need to live your life without them. If you haven't died since they ghosted you... you sure won't die from their absence. Please understand that "Life isn't that serious to keep you emotionally enslaved from another person's insensitivity to communicate and rid you of the burden of guilt -thinking you did them wrong." My word to you is; pour your heart into your hobbies, work, family and friends who'd kiss the ground for you. You're enough and the most important person alive today! Treat yourself as important as the CREATOR GOD chose you to bless this earth with your greatness. Peace & Love.

  • @DraculaAD1972
    @DraculaAD1972 3 роки тому +6

    This is probably the best analysis of this kind of situation. Very professionally explained. Thanks a million Ashley

  • @1loveshonuff
    @1loveshonuff 4 роки тому +5

    You were on point with everything. Working on cutting off toxic people.

  • @jennycueva2949
    @jennycueva2949 3 роки тому +9

    Thank you for making this video. I’ve been having a hard time fully letting go from the narcissistic abuse I received from a friend for over 2 years, to the point that it’s hard to even talk about it bc I’ve never let someone in the way I allowed her to and I ignored the red flags. I regret it. On top of that I apologized to her if I caused her any damage when the damage was done to me. She never apologized. That happened in 2019 and I’m still figuring out how to move on once & for all. This situation has prevented me from making new friends bc of fear that I’d go through the same. Thank you so much for the video, it felt like you were talking to me bc everything you said is what I relate to.

    • @lucyclark3920
      @lucyclark3920 3 роки тому

      Dr Steve can make your ex come back to you begging you for a second chance. He helped me restore back my broken relationship of 5 years by bringing back my ex Also Dr Steve always keep up with his words I strongly Advise you to seek help from him

    • @lucyclark3920
      @lucyclark3920 3 роки тому

      Whatsapp him

    • @lucyclark3920
      @lucyclark3920 3 роки тому

      +2347030894892🙏🏾 🙏🏾

    • @AoifeConnollyMusic
      @AoifeConnollyMusic 3 роки тому

      I’ve been there! It’s horrible but don’t let it hold you back anymore. Educate yourself on red flags and what made you vulnerable to narcisstic abuse. Once you know yourself better you’ll be able to sidestep these people better X

  • @lucreziaborgia5798
    @lucreziaborgia5798 4 роки тому +11

    If someone blocked me, I would definitely look into the mirror first. If I´d see nothing wrong there, I´d relativate with an honest reality-check and wouldn´t care so much. The real bad cases first de-block you and then keep coming back to you. If you´re saved from this, be happy and collect yourself.

  • @catsquibb1529
    @catsquibb1529 3 роки тому +10

    This is truly inspiring thank you for this. Why should I give my energy to someone like this when I can spend my energy on myself and putting my time into what and who makes me happy and who doesn’t hurt me 😊🙏

  • @cujo7778
    @cujo7778 3 роки тому +12

    They do not like Consquences or being Accountable

  • @Darkraz
    @Darkraz 4 роки тому +6

    Your videos has really saved me - thank you
    A 42 year old woman did this to me ...42! Can not believe people can’t be mature. Have space have distance, but at some point at least have the decency to show respect care and communicate. I’ll keep trying

    • @lucybee3361
      @lucybee3361 3 роки тому

      My ex was 57 years old even sent me a picture of his new girlfriend

    • @kareendeveraux1847
      @kareendeveraux1847 2 роки тому +1

      My ex bestie is an educated psychologist, she did this, too. I was disagreeing on her bullshit. 😂 Some people are just fuck-ups and always will be, no matter how old or educated they are.

  • @frankielebert6599
    @frankielebert6599 5 років тому +62

    It was a relationship i was in for 4 years this person left me and blocks me and always run away my mistake is that i allow this person to keep doing this to me thanks it really helps me

    • @CarolDudeck-bl7kz
      @CarolDudeck-bl7kz 4 роки тому +3

      I was fortunate most Narcissistic victims go back a minimum of 8 times, I left right at the “TRUANGULATION”!😁🌹

    • @gigivlogs1117
      @gigivlogs1117 4 роки тому

      @Frankie lebert godblessed will same situation he don't like to listen NY explained he block right away good luck..

    • @DavidMORENO-ud8eq
      @DavidMORENO-ud8eq 4 роки тому +1

      Frankie Lebert, I can definitely relate. The person who claims to love you and be your partner in life shows you there true colors on always running away from a problem or ending things because they don’t like to hear nor accept things they may have done. I kept going back to the woman who did that to me multiple times but the only person I can blame is myself. I should of known better. I had to learn the hard way but at the end of the day I know I tried my best and gave them my all no matter what.

    • @asgharakram
      @asgharakram 4 роки тому

      4yr here also randomly says it's over. Blocked me on everything

    • @rohanrajah8839
      @rohanrajah8839 3 роки тому

      Sorry for your situation.

  • @PsychedPerspective
    @PsychedPerspective 5 років тому +20

    Yup!!! Completely discarded and ignored aka silent treatment!!!

  • @itsjazzyjules
    @itsjazzyjules 2 роки тому +3

    This video truly helped. Thank you so much. I did nothing, and this "online friend" blocked me out of nowhere - no fights or anything, yet I got blocked. Only knew her for a year, and she's a teenager while I'm 30 (we knew each other because of a common interest). None of my real life friends would do this to me, or my online friends of over 5 years. So yeah I should get over it and move on and maybe be really careful right now when engaging with new online friends, especially those who are under 20. I really shouldn't have talked about personal things with her. It still hurts, and I would've appreciated if she told me what went wrong before leaving, but I hope to recover in a few days and eventually move on, because this is the only time I got blocked.

    • @EMVelez
      @EMVelez Рік тому

      Why were you communicating with a teenager?

  • @lightupskechers488
    @lightupskechers488 5 років тому +16

    this just happend to me i can agree it actually feels horrible when some one you thought was your good friend that blocked you
    they blocked me yesterday and even tho its passed i still feel sad

    • @grank9090
      @grank9090 3 роки тому +1

      Sending love I hope it is better now

  • @starsstripes2393
    @starsstripes2393 3 роки тому +3

    I've noticed when I'm not in a good place,I attract people that aren't in a good place,people who have problems,and I think I can fix their problems..i try to do this because I can't fix my own.Complete projection!

  • @melaniereed3494
    @melaniereed3494 3 роки тому +7

    After about 25 years of what I felt was friendship, I finally started educating myself about narcissism... looking back, there were constant red flags, gaslighting, silent treatment, flying monkeys, word salad, etc etc but because I was so ignorant, I ignored all of it. Once I started waking up to the truth of our relationship and setting boundaries - she freaked out completely. I gave her several chances to make changes and she just was not interested. Okay fine, but I cannot go back to sleep again... so now - no contact. It has taken some time, but worth it to have all of that drama out of my life. I now have no problems setting boundaries in all of my relationships and feel great standing up for myself.

    • @isabellajames157
      @isabellajames157 3 роки тому

      Dr Steve can actually help you attract someone you really love the most and want in your life. He once helped me and can help you too.

    • @isabellajames157
      @isabellajames157 3 роки тому

      Believe me I'm not bragging or trying to make unnecessary comment here, this was what really happened to me. he helped me attract (Jeremy) the guy I wanted in my life the most.

    • @isabellajames157
      @isabellajames157 3 роки тому

      +2347 030 894 892.🙏

    • @isabellajames157
      @isabellajames157 3 роки тому

      Wht ssap Him

  • @mariamkinen8036
    @mariamkinen8036 4 роки тому +21

    I am very clear about the fact that I'd need a fresh start.

  • @marciamellow1211
    @marciamellow1211 3 роки тому +2

    Always come BACK TO YOURSELF... works everytime❤

  • @alexanicobon6074
    @alexanicobon6074 2 роки тому +3

    I have met this friend of mine three months ago on a video game, and he was actually so funny when I met him. We share the same interest, and even talk about our personal life. He’s been so supportive of my dream of becoming an animator and he even wanted me to visit him after college so we could hang out. But we kept playing this video game, I did encounter some red flags (just like what you have mentioned). I tolerated them, because yea I thought that he could change and learn from that. We do have these small arguments sometimes but we would get along afterwards and the relationship would even get better.
    But just last night I have decided to quit the game because of both personal reasons and school reasons,,, he definitely didn’t take it well. He then blocked me on Discord and blocked me in the game. We didn’t even get to talk about it that much,,
    Thank you for this video. It really seemed like you were talking to me and you delivered your message the best way possible because I related to everything you said here. It is hard to let go of someone who’s been so important to you,,, actually I told him that I liked him, and he even reciprocated that feeling as well. But if things doesn’t work out, it just doesn’t.
    So once again, thank you for this video.

  • @Jakilyn
    @Jakilyn 2 місяці тому +1

    Going through this now. It really hurts and offends me that he'd block me with no warning or reason. Not even giving me the respect of a final convo when he knows I'm emotionally secure and self aware. Just puzzling but trying to accept and move forward. I suppose blocking/ghosting is an easy way to throw someone in the trash without the need for a discussion

  • @stephenherrick9971
    @stephenherrick9971 6 років тому +15

    Besides being helpful and reinforcing, I completely relate to her street smart sense of sarcastic humor as well as accurate depictions when describing the chaotic issues!!!. Great presentation when describing answers as well as the big questions...ENCORE

    • @LifecoachAshleyBerges
      @LifecoachAshleyBerges  6 років тому +1

      Thank you for reaching out Stephen! Humor helps us to deal with these types of things and work to not internalize them as much. BTW: Keep being awesome!

  • @kimegmore7825
    @kimegmore7825 3 роки тому +1

    Thank you so much!! This makes so much sense !! It hurts so much, but you need to see that it’s their problem not yours.

  • @janeh832
    @janeh832 4 роки тому +7

    Ive blocked people on social media as i was being made a fool of and been manipulated, i trusted these people, then they insist on making me look stupid infront of strangers, so i just blocked them out.

  • @gwendolynalbert1984
    @gwendolynalbert1984 4 роки тому +6

    I had to block someone narcissist there is nothing to apologize for. Just stopped talking to them, because they continually mock me and make fun of me say trouble things. If you tell them they would laugh and make you the problem. They would gaslight you. She has her Entourage but I've cut myself out of her life so I can't be treated that way. You cannot not talk to them. I don't really care because I am doing much better. What would I do if someone cut me out of their life. I would try to find out what I did and try to make things right. If they no longer want to be friends that is ok. They have made the choice. I need to go on.

  • @blessedt573
    @blessedt573 4 роки тому +10

    I’ve never experienced this before until I started dating this guy who is notorious for breaking up with me and then blocking me. I’ve been asking myself why do I tolerate it, and why do I still want him back? Can’t deal with over sensitive men anymore

  • @lonewolfheart1697
    @lonewolfheart1697 Рік тому +1

    I've literally just had this experience by someone I recently started dating... it was developing into a relationship. He showed up, we went on dates, his communication was consistent and affectionate... then BAM... very late last night, I checked my phone... he's gone, blocked me on absolutely everything. I have absolutely NO IDEA why this happened... I do have an abusive childhood, breakdown in previous marriage BUT I've had decades of therapy to help me. I have down everything in my power to get myself straight, making myself feel better and yet this has happened. I'll get over it but the pain right now is excruciating. I'm glad that videos like this exist because I want to heal from this.

  • @samsoto338
    @samsoto338 Рік тому +3

    In addition to blocking for protection (which is totally reasonable), sometimes people block others to pressure them, mistreat them, humiliate them, or make them feel bad. If they ever do that THEY HAVE TO ADMIT THE TRUTH. THEY CANT DENY IT OR LIE.

  • @becksinc.2069
    @becksinc.2069 Рік тому +3

    When people block you for no reason(you don't bother them) , block them back & delete the number.
    #All about your self respect

  • @kristelblue1668
    @kristelblue1668 5 років тому +4

    Time . It just takes time. 5 months not speaking to my sister. Very hard and sad and hurtful. But , I’m so much better!! This video is perfectly said. It’s my situation to a tee. I definitely on the right track. I also stood up to my boss the other day for the way he spoke to me . Even tho I cried while telling him i felt good about it and will work harder not to cry!! It’s interesting to me how my family dynamics have completely changed. I have tried over the years to maintain a relationship with my parents who don’t want to get involved. I no longer feel a need to do this any longer. And I noticed they have pulled back. They will not ask me about what has happened with my sister. I can laugh about it now. My relationship with my oldest sister changed too! I can’t remember the last time she picked up the phone to call me. It’s a one sided relationship. And on top of all this .. they all agree my sister is a narcissist but no one will address it or the fact that she hadn’t spoken to me in 5 months. But I’m ok!!! I used to look to them for help. Now I feel peaceful to get away from the drama. I feel like myself and I feel confident and true to myself. I set up the boundaries and held on to them and everyone in my family fled. Lol!!! My husband and my children have been my focal point now and my relationship with my husband has grown. I’m grateful for this experience! It was through the help of videos like yours ... validation and just learning about dynamics of a relationship and learning about narcissist. My father is a true narcissist. I see where my sister got it from:(. God bless my family and love to them... I’m better and working on the best person I can be!!! Stay strong friends!! It takes time. Not easy at all but I see the light in me . 😘

  • @emanuel_soundtrack
    @emanuel_soundtrack 2 роки тому +3

    i am deeply traumatized by this happening over and over again. Even when i care so much for she (or friends ) invest more than me, then they self eject

  • @TheMrQuino
    @TheMrQuino 5 років тому +10

    Communication with bpd partner is one way unfortunately due driven by their intense emotions and distorted reality. They can't think rationally. Lies, gaslight, abuse, anger. Unconscious survival mechanism but well here we were. I patiently let her break up the way she wanted. She wasn't ready to go without any contact; she said, but did break up. I accepted it but well, i'm not an object, i told her its time to say goodbye so and give a closure even she didn't want. I cut her off my life then and blocked her. Hurtful for both of us but i don't want she reach out after few weeks or months and get involved in the idealization-devalutation-discard cycle again. She ruins me once, enough, i'm aware now..

    • @TheMrQuino
      @TheMrQuino 4 роки тому +1

      @@SaffJade If you are nothing like that, good on you ! Wish you all the best

  • @paulaneary7877
    @paulaneary7877 3 роки тому +3

    Thank You Ashley. This has been the MOST helpful video I have watched on this subject matter. I appreciate you putting this content up. It helped me quite a bit this evening in particular. Deepest gratitude!

  • @GiezelleBernal
    @GiezelleBernal 3 роки тому +2

    Thank you. I’ve learned my lesson from this. I too was scared of the truth, but also realized I been in this shit for along time that I learned resilience.

  • @JC.Realm7
    @JC.Realm7 2 роки тому +4

    The issue of modern relationships is actually about a deeper issue, an issue about this spiritually bankrupt time. It is not so easy to put up boundaries and find a healthy relationship in this narcissistic time period. People aren't how they used to be back in the day - back when people were more God-fearing and had this natural innocence and character strength to them... This is the primary reason behind why modern relationships (romantic or otherwise) are so frustrating and vain.

  • @gracewright7938
    @gracewright7938 5 років тому +1

    Ashley you have such a nice way about you, it is so comfortable to listen to you and your advice. I was left in such mass confusion, sorrow, stunned, like a dog who was thrown out of a car by a family he loved, completely lost. I sobbed for a long time, I searched for answers, I went back to church to ask for help, I searched for others with the same experience. It has been a long road. I learned to make new friends and go out on my own.

  • @pualo9263
    @pualo9263 4 роки тому +4

    Its self gratification knowing you have your bf who loves you keep wanting you, and have options for even more validation to build your own self esteem. Also hurt your bf bevause he didnt do enough for you. Its easier to get plan b rather fix the relationship complications.

  • @maestrapadilla9417
    @maestrapadilla9417 Рік тому +1

    This is the BEST video I have seen on this subject. Thank You!

  • @melissaganzel6252
    @melissaganzel6252 3 роки тому +3

    Thank you, this is what I'am going through right now! I watched this at the perfect time.

  • @irenebuford8930
    @irenebuford8930 4 роки тому +2

    What I did was I decided to not allow that person back in my life, he was a narcissist and he had done the block thing more than once... I decided to never again deal with that man, so that I don't have to deal with his narcissist block mood swing... I have great valuable human beings in my life, people that work with me and we talk it out... I also excepted that any man that wants me would not act like that... That person is a child... Excellent Video....

  • @essiesdancevidsandtravels6917
    @essiesdancevidsandtravels6917 4 роки тому +6

    If there is a social media they forgot to block u with block them back.... Sooner or later they will find themselves alone THENNN they will reach out to me again but this time I will have set my boundaries and not respond and I can watch them suffer the way they did to me and hopefully they will see the value that was there before they pulled their big stink!

    • @jacklampin2411
      @jacklampin2411 2 роки тому

      I had a friend who recently blocked me and she hadn’t responded to me in 2 weeks she was always ghosting me and I always felt like I was walking on eggshells with her and recently I told her how I really felt and she blocked my number and didn’t block me on Instagram after I sent her a DM asking her to give me another chance and unblock me and she didn’t respond and I’m starting to hate her is this normal please respond

  • @chrisnewtownnsw
    @chrisnewtownnsw Рік тому

    really solid great advice in this vid. I just think to myself: You are free to do whatever you want, that is your human right to make that choice to block me and I will not stand in your way or show any aggression whatsoever but just know there are consequences for taking that path and that is it will have to be you that crawls back to me and if you don't well we must have just been incompatible all along.

  • @johndoe-jt7iz
    @johndoe-jt7iz 5 років тому +9

    a quiet borderline blocked me and say we are no friends. she gaslighted me alot before, i feel kinda very bad

  • @Direx230
    @Direx230 Рік тому +3

    Just ignore them in person. If they blocked you, it’s for a reason. In person, they will pretend that they did nothing. Once you show how you moved on, it will destroy them. Smile, it’s the ultimate revenge.

  • @kammanzil
    @kammanzil 4 роки тому +33

    i spent years dating narcissistic men, unknowingly. I recently came to realise that these triggers are rooted in my relationship with my parents. My father is a narcissist as well my mother with mild tendencies. For decades i suffered with feelings of displacement in my relationships with both men and some women. I came out recently as transgendered.. which opened up a whole new set of issues facing emotional differences between women and men. Living as a transgendered person (woman) i've had to face a considerable amount of narcissistic and toxic masculinity issues which continue to affect my relationships with men - i was wondering do you have any practical advice for transgender people who are too often marginalised in society - despite this are looking to seek more healthier ways of connecting with people and building meaningful relationships ?

    • @t.w.8174
      @t.w.8174 2 роки тому +1

      I see no reply from her, so I feel compelled to say something. I’m not a therapist, but all I can offer is to say collect all of the best things that you love about yourself on a list and right them down. One by one, go through the list and say out loud “I want a partner who sees, values, and loves___in/about me”(naming an item on that list in the blank). Stay focused on those power statement, and the right friends and partner will eventually come :). Bless~

  • @fillmorehillmore8239
    @fillmorehillmore8239 3 роки тому +7

    7+ Billion people on the planet. I write off the blockers and move on.

    • @aurboda
      @aurboda 3 роки тому

      this should be one of the first comments ppl should see

    • @aurboda
      @aurboda 3 роки тому

      bump

  • @Calidore1
    @Calidore1 4 роки тому +1

    Well said. Just go with it, keep your counsel and remember why you loved them. Anything is possible.

  • @Mumble8988
    @Mumble8988 Рік тому +4

    It bothers me more when I have absolutely zero clue as to why I was blocked. Cause I’m thinking, what the hell did I do to you? What’s your problem with me? Did I wrong you somehow? What did I do to deserve this?

    • @verosjourney
      @verosjourney Рік тому

      Yes, and your mind pops up questions like
      "Was it because I answered my phone while visiting her?"
      "Did I say something?"
      "Did I forget something?"

    • @Mumble8988
      @Mumble8988 Рік тому

      @@verosjourney It's funny how your brain immediately goes to relationship issues..I've had Friends block me for seemingly no reason...Male friends as well.

  • @antonydavis8004
    @antonydavis8004 Рік тому +1

    Thank you so much Ashley ❤. This has just happened to me with two very long friendships. What happened I started to set boundaries regarding my time and money , I ignored the red flags because I thought I valued the relationships . One blocked me who owes me money the other has ghosted me because they have been using my good nature for 25 years for discounts with my business. I thought them both friends now feel stupid tbh but also free in some weird way. A real lesson learnt ( thanks narcissist dad ) . Anyone going through this , have some self respect , use the time lost in these friendships to work on yourself , you’ll be just fine and at peace ❤)