Even when these sick creeps get caught most do not get the proper punishment...20 years jail should be minium and standard....to use a penis as a weapon is no different than using a gun or fists....long term damage is done
BREAKING NEWS: THE VERDICT IS IN! Dragan Vujicin was found guilty this morning of 10 counts of Rape and Child Trafficking in the Swakopmund Magistrate Court. His bail was revoked and he was immediately remanded back into custody. There will be no more victims. Now the long journey begins for his victims to come to terms with their experiences. But at least they rest with the knowledge that they did all they could and he is no threat to any more children.
Finishing this doc has given me a lot to think about with my own Step-father and the abuse I've endured from 6 to 20 yrs old. As far as how she carries herself after it all. How aware she is of herself. It's inspiring and uplifting.
A 68-YEAR-OLD man who was found guilty on charges of child rape and trafficking two weeks ago received prison terms totalling 90 years with his sentencing at Swakopmund today. Swakopmund Regional Court magistrate Gayor Poulton sentenced the Serbian-born Dragan Vujicin this afternoon (Friday) at the coastal town.
Very interesting. My sister was molested by my mother's boyfriend when she was very young. I only remember the baseball bat my mother took to him but at the time didn't understand why. I do now.
If you are a parent that's the very reason you NEED to listen and learn. Never think for a minute that you know better. You'll find yourself taken for the fool faster than you can say it
The relationship between an abuser and their victim is a complex one and this film demonstrates this very effectively. This woman is still under the control of her abuser. Never believe a word they say, they are skilled manipulators and will tell you exactly what you want to hear. It's a shame that he is free and able to continue his abuse.
I agree with you 100% - except that I can assure you I am not under his control in any way. When I interviewed him, it was the first time I saw him since the day the secret came out. I am STILL fighting to get him convicted and sent to jail because I do believe that it the only place he should be. But, 5 years on, I'm still fighting.
WTF! Saying that a 3 yr old girl was "so mature, and into that particular thing"????!!! (16:25), ..."You were 3 years old, but YOU ACTED like you had all the experience in the world"...WTF IS THAT!!! SOOOOO disturbing!!! What a piece of SH*T!
Came here from Surving Life channel. Enjoyed your interview with Ron. As a hypervigelant parent, I found this very insightful and helpful in protecting my daughter to the best of my abilities.💖
You dont really have to be "hypervigilant" to keep your daughter safe from a step-father. Too many women will take a man and know nothing about him. Please do not be overly protective of your daughter. I have seen first hand that paranoia parenting can be worse than actual abuse. Never being allowed to do anything, not allowed to have a phone, parents constantly checking the phone, going through room, etc. Just have a healthy relationship with your daughter.
I'm a child abuse survivor & this is the best, most honestly detailed documentary about itr I've ever seen. It has answered & asked so many questions, that have just been left as confusion in my head. Amazing, absolutely amazing!!!
I don’t think I’ve ever seen a documentary About pedophiles where the pedophile explains in such detail how they go about choosing and grooming their victims. It’s crazy to listen to him talking so non chalantly
That was the point of sucking up my own emotions / feelings / anxieties and getting this done and out there. We need to LISTEN and learn so we can act appropriately. What we are currently doing as society is doing nothing but sending these people into the shadows. Bring them out so we can actually address it properly and like adults... without emotion getting in the way.
@@lucywitts17708 That's right. I get your point. If society encourages them to come out and seek help (without rebuke), then our children will be much safer. A safwr world for us really. I know it sounds crazy but that would be a potentially good solution to the paedophilia problem. The number of child victims will definitely be reduced. But what treatment is out there for them? Doesn't seem like anything promising really at the moment. Evidence states that even with therapy, there is no guarantee that the person will not re-offend again, it only has a temporary effect. The paedophilia thinking in their brain is a life-long thing. Those afflicted with the mental health problem will always think like that up until their last day on earth. It has no cure because it has to do with the brain, the brain setting abnormal. Just like other mental illnesses such as schizophrenia etc are life-long. You just have to manage it. Cannot be cured at least right now. If I could make a wish, it would be for paedophilia to have a "definite" cure. Something as simple as popping a pill or undergoing a brain surgery and it is gone forever. That would really make me happy. Because as a former child abuse victim and after having known and even loved a paedophile, he was my best friend (sometimes they are family, close family and it is not something that u discover right away because majority are very good at hiding it to protect themselves from being arrested). I realised that they are actually normal regular human beings like you and I, not psychopaths like how the media likes to portray it, no different at all to any one of us, except for the illness happening in their brains. The sick sexual mentality- which I believe that they genuinely do not know or recognise it as abnormal or wrong, because that is what their brain tells them, that it is right. The way we think is controlled by our brain. Not we controlling our brains. This is why they are helpless at the problem. They cannot help offending and even re-offending sometimes even whilst being on the available treatments mostly psychotherapy (known as relapse). Whilst locked up in jail they are physically and sexually away from children, however research has shown that "this" has still not 'cured' them of the abnormal thoughts, the brain hasn't stopped thinking abnormally. It's going to need more than just locking them up. Options include therapy whilst in cell and please people donate to research funding the cure for paedophilia. Donate, set up a research institute yourselves. Make this world a better place for us all. Encourage anyone u know to seek help and the govt please stop focusing on locking paedophiles up, rather focus more on spending money on health research for these people. They are everywhere due to being genetic and the problem is getting worse by the year. No one steps out for treatment as the therapists themselves (by law) will ring the police to come and imprison them at the clinic once they start to confess their feelings out and what they have done. (A mental illness just like other mental illnesses such as depression and schizophrenia etc). Does not need discriminating here, that's just the way I see it. It is so rampant worldwide at such a rate that I think that there has to be a genetic/inherited component to it. It is important for people to know that paedophilia is "mostly" self-discovered and not chosen by the person. Both the paedophile (who self-discovers his ill-manner of thinking/sexual attraction to kids during puberty and cannot seek any help or tell anyone for support due to the fear of him being arrested) and the poor innocent children who fall victim to his illness, in my opinion are both sufferers. Sad.
Interesting how he was STILL trying to groom her in her interview with him. It was so obvious he was hoping she would have "feelings" for him. SO crazy that this man is out gawking at children in the street!!! What the actual f'ck
This is making me sick! It seems to be normalizing an adult raping a child! WTH!!!! That will NEVER be normal no matter how it’s portrayed! It destroys children’s lives for the pleasure of the sick adult Heartbreaking to think it would be acceptable to take a child’s innocence for ANY reason!
Me too. It makes men sick too. wow...now he's connecting spirit to it all. They are certainly trying to make this gross perversion as normal. They want age of consent to be age 3. I wonder how old she was when he had intercourse with her. I heard so very ugly stories about girls being raped by father, brothers, uncles and friends. Those poor girls are torn apart inside. bladders, bowels. I don't know what else.
Someone here commented that “this documentary is repulsive”. My reply : “if you mean the subject of the documentary is repulsive, you are right. But this documentary is EXCELLENT in its courage, in its intent to help others in similar abuses and its production” Thank you Victoria and everyone who helped stand with you to do this, especially your husband. I can imagine he must be one of the main reasons for your present successful journey to health and peace. Keep it up and keep going. I’ve read most of your personal replies and they are all excellent and so genuine. God bless.✊🏼👍🏻
Hi! Thank you for your comment. You are absolutely spot on. The subject matter is repulsive. But it is so important that we talk about it openly to break the walls of secrecy. I do have an incredible husband and children. My husband has stood by me and held my hand through it all. He has held me up when I needed him to and he has stood close beside me for support when I needed and wanted to stand alone. Similarly, my children. My children have had to endure my growth and the pain that that growth inflicted. They have turned a forgiving cheek when I have been over cautious and sheltering of them because they have understood that I do it to protect them. They have understood my fears - particularly online - and reassure me of their safety with more information than I probably need to make me feel their safety and their caution. They have understood that sleepovers are simply not allowed until they were able to protect themselves. I put a lot more pressure on them because of my fears and caution - but I have never kept my past secret from them. They have both seen this film and whilst they don't understand it all, they do understand that Mummy grew up in a damaging situation and that because of that, they are protected in the way that they are. My husband is the balance in that scale. When our children have felt I'm being over-cautious and clipping their wings, they discuss it with dad and then together they reassure me. He has been my yardstick, my rock, my tissue, my friend and everything in between. My youngest is only chuffed that his mum is on UA-cam and that's apparently so cool.
Wow! What a powerful documentary! And totally 100% agree with you that confronting it head one is the right thing to do. What predators fear most is the light of day so shedding light on their thoughts, their tactics, their motivations is the right thing to do. For too long we've hidden behind shame and fear of scandal and let these types of people thrive! Well done.
He is blaming her and continues to manipulate her. “She wanted to and her Mother said it was ok.” I seriously doubt that. He is a sick bastard who should be in prison
Maybe she is at a good place in her life where she can sit and listen to him. Just because she was a victim doesnt mean she should allow herself to be victimized by him for the rest of her life
Or maybe heres a better reason / reasons... Closure ? And CLOSURE WITH NAILS IN HIS PERVERBIAL COFFIN ?? as in mr. Cluster b just told all on camera... Now his head wrecking fat ass in slammed up for his mess and trafficing... Wuh huh huh huh ! He a narc though in my eyes and probably love winding up others in there.. He sounds reallllly clumsy .. so might have a accident reallly quick.. or get wat a narc needs.. resistance.. or get top trumped by a worse cluster b peep. . . These peeps are fierce.. i comprehend him and his @ 5 lies .. text book cluster b.. imo.. would not make sense other wise... Hes so hounest ish.. its wierd.. he does lie to explain.. trow mum under bus/ blame mom for " trigger " pfft ! Imo.. Lions lieing with lambs.. no love / care.. empathy for others.. others are not allowed be seperate from there view of them... " Deficiency in responcibility... ". " Everyone elses fault.." if caught only.. Cluster b bs...
The mother knew everything ,even though the daughter would love to deny that fact. The mother’s answers gave her away-the reason she didn’t want to ask her daughter what happened is a very classic way of burrying eveything and not wanting to be questioned of her role in the whole thing. Every mother has an instinct,some ignore it to stay with the man and act shocked when it finally comes out,but I can assure you all of that wouldn’t have gone on without the mother not having an incling. These men choose weak vulnerable women but that doesn’t mean the women are oblivious to what’s happening, they simply turn a blind eye cos for some women the men/relationship means more than the child so they protect the relationship and not the child. Also the daughter believing her mother is natural way of protecting herself cos the alternative is knowing that her mother gave him access,and that’s hard to accept for anyone.
Lucy has been completely brainwashed and is definitely not healed from her trauma. She has dissociated herself from her 2-12 year old self and cannot even see the damage that has taken root.
You speak with such absolution as though you "know" this "definitely". I would suggest that this is a gross assumption and would go further to say that your assumption could not be further from the truth. It is interesting to hear your opinion though. But let's not forget that that's what it is. It is not "definitely" fact it is very much your opinion.
My god, after reading the description and watching the documentary, Dragan is incredibly self absorbed and unable to take responsibility. The way he explains everything, he’s basically made it seem like it was the girls’ fault and he had no choice to. Ahsklabdkaldjla ugh it’s just so gross the way he talks.
That was emotionally taxing to watch. They never seem like complete monsters and that’s the point, they even manipulate the watcher into thinking that they aren’t so bad until you actually try to wrap your head around their actual crime when a child is only 2 years old. Strong lady
Extraordinary, outstanding film ... with honesty, compassion and horror. God bless you Lucy for sharing this experience - may it guide and help other victims of this horrific abuse.
I can so relate to this video because my biological father doing the same BUT my mother knew all along what has happened. And she told me that she threatened to leave him (with the 4 children) if he didn't stop abusing me. And she told me (after he died of course) that he responded with "Diane is mine to f**k whenever I want." (Sorry if I offended anyone). I reported him several years later, he was convicted to 3 yrs in prison to which many people were seriously upset for 15+yrs of sexual abuse. It has marked me for life on many levels emotionally, sexually, spiritually. I live alone now for over 19yrs and can't get sexual or emotional closeness for I've lost trust in people. Dosen't mean that I don't long for closeness, I just can't trust. Wonderful video. Thank you
I literally know how you feel. Whilst i do still try to love and have a partner, it never seems to go well. I myself seem to have a knack for still attracting the 'wrong sort' if you will.. They end up being or doing the very things i can't stand (lying quite badly, cheating, not really wanting to be monogamous, etc etc..) and my bad judge of character and attraction to the wrong people seems to stem from the corruption and abuse i was subject to as a child.. Most people can't really comprehend or fathom what effect this can have on some in the long term. Whilst on the surface i seem to have "survived" quite well, sure i've done much better than some but far worse than others! I congratulate both you and the creator of this video for being so brave. Thank you too!
Only after I realized the guilt and shame I carried were not mine to own or carry, was I freed from my childhood abuse. Give yourself the gift of forgiveness, so as not to stain your soul with the same stain as the peadophile. We do this not for the peadophile but for ourselves. Only after doing this for myself was I able to learn to trust and have a 17 year relationship with a wonderful caring man who was able to help me heal, God rest his soul, I miss him and will forever, RIP shayne
Trust is so Hard. And we live in a very sexualized World,,,so No one tales the time to get to know each other. You are not alone in No longer coping with the relations available.
I'm so sorry that you have spent so much time alone. I get that. I really do. I consider myself so fortunate not to have had that manifestation to that level. But I can 100% appreciate how that can be so. x
@@c.a.greene8395 The gift of forgiveness. Well put - I like that. And THAT is what that hug is all about. It's my gift to me. It's my forgiveness of myself and also of him. I am free.
Here from your interview on Surviving Life. Just starting the documentary, so not much to say. You are such a strong person. To be able to sit down and have a civil conversation takes so much strength. I’ve been struggling a lot in my own journey of healing. This came at a really important time. Thank you for sharing your journey.
@marloon3 It's really important to realise that I have been actively walking on my journey of self discovery, self forgiveness and understanding for at least 30 years now. It has taken me a L O N G time to be okay with it all and to have the ability to draw a constructive perspective removed from my person. Take your time. Baby steps. You will get through it. The only advice I can give you that I wish people had given me, was be conscious of the language you use with yourself and pay absolutely no attention to what other people say or how people expect you to feel or react or behave. Be true to yourself. Only you know your truth.
one moment the mother says she knew nothing and then she actually admits that she did not know how to handle things because she was in love with him ?? wtf
My abuse was very similar to yours in that it started when I was very very young, and never felt like abuse while it was happening. It was a slow evolution where this person becomes the most special adult in your life and the most trusted adult. I remember being 6 and taking car rides with my abuser where we would have long conversations about his childhood and how he was also groomed (although he portrayed it as being a willing participant). He was my best friend. It wasn’t until I was older and began to understand that our interactions were abnormal that I realized what was happening, however, up until that time it did not feel abusive or harmful. I’ve toiled with the juxtaposition of feeling love and empathy while also feeling anger and disgust for this man that was the only benevolent father figure in my life. I can understand how some people cant wrap their head around the level of calm and astuteness that you had while interviewing your abuser, because not everyone has the same type of abuser. It’s unconscionable to comprehend unless you were groomed in a similar fashion.
Ive never seen a documentary on pedophelia like this one! So brutally honest and very inciteful as far as the "grooming" aspects of pedophelia go. I cannot help but feel as if something is missing,however. I do not mean intentionally left out but perhaps more could be included about your reaching out to Psychologists,more specifics about certain encounters(I know that sounds odd but to someone like me,who has never been sexually abused it is so difficult to put into perspective) and more about your mother and her true feelings and intuitions. This was very sad,shocking and I feel for any victim of sex abuse. I also question your mother and her handling of the entire situation. Thank you for uploading this. Maybe Part 2 would be just as educational and interesting. Bless!
Thank you Jane, I appreciate this comment. I am considering a part 2 - but to be honest the pain that I have to go through to do the edits is extremely taxing on me and the vial abuse that I receive from people's ignorant comments affect me deeply - even though I wish I could say I was a cold heartless person who didn't care a damn. I don't regret making the film and I never will. But I do regret reading the comments. If you have specific questions you are welcome to contact me via email (my contact details are in the description) and I'd be more than happy to give you as much further insight that you require or need. I just do believe at the moment that for now I have given enough of 'me' to the trolls of society.
What I want to know is WHY is paedophilia so widespread? WHY are there so many paedophiles? What is the root cause or IS there a root cause? I agree we have to start learning to understand why this happens in the first place.
Its controversial and not my own opinion but consider when a girl reaches child bearing age. What 12/13? Now consider pornography, its shaven clean (child like). Why adults are attracted to babies. Goodness knows. I can only imagine its related to innocence, vulnerability
Lucy there is so much i could say... i was abused, not for a sustained amount of time but it was a family member who also abused me more emotionally. I thought i had got over it but it actually screwed up my life. I'm currently having emdr therapy. Anyway, this is not about me but you and i felt very sad and shed some tears that you were such a beautiful innocent baby and it was all taken from you. I do understand that it must have been so hard after you had such a connection with him. From the bottom of my heart i wish you full healing and a happy happy life, lots of love and hugs xxx
I'm sorry you had bad experiences too. Emotional abuse is often as damaging as physical abuse - especially because it's so hard to put a finger on and identify. I'm pleased you're receiving help. That's important. Unpack it. Process it. Understand it. And then take back your power. Good on you!!
Im crying watching this. He groomed your entire family. That he says you even looked like you enjoyed it. How awful. He made you feel so extremely special to him that you willingly accepted the abuse. This is what happened to me. It took me 40 years to twll someone.
I know that this was filmed in 2017, but I came across this through Surviving Life channel, and I have to acknowledge that im literally tearing up watching thee incredible amount of kindness, forgiveness, that you possess in your heart, and your slightly different perspective on these kinds of issues that most do not have. This is how you are able to move on and enjoy life without any hatred. Reading some of these comments are so negative, people forget that pedophilia is a preference developed for some at a young age or develops through religious sexual repression, and evolves over time, that is almost impossible to control . Violence against these individuals is not the answer. In no way am I justifying acts of pedophilia. I also appreciate how patient you were able to listen to him speak. You are amazing, and I hope to see future projects on these topics. Thankyou for this.
New motto.. THIS IS SOMETHING I NEED TO LIVE BY. THEY GET AWAY WITH MURDER. YOUR RIGHT. THANK YOU!! :( I Don't know what to do with a demon I know.. but me not doing nothing is killing me on the inside. I wish I could expose him to the world but no one would believe me how evil he really is :( No he's not a pedo but he is a predator unfortunately. Hardest part was realizing that I was never loved and I have nothing. He destroyed my values and murdered my spirit and I ended up on the streets alone😭 Scared Everything gone I was abandoned with NO CLOSER over night. Its still tramatic to put in my thoughts .. I see so many similar traits in Dragon as I do my ex. Soulless walking dead, bag of bones! Real life vampires that suck the life out of you. They have no reflections in the mirror but are masters at memicing or mirroring others so they feel normal on the inside. Predators 👺💀
Wow! This the most informative documentary, in understanding this problem. Very shocking.. How something so 'bad' as perceived, by both parties, to be 'good'. Excellent work. Thank You for your work.
Lucy, I just watched your documentary & then re-watched it. I want to thank you for opening up about something so private & sharing your experience with us. You are one courageous woman & I applaud you for your bravery. 🥰❤💐
This video provides a lot of insight into a very difficult topic. I am thankful that nothing like this ever happened to me. We can't just sweep this kind of thing under the rug and expect it to go away.
Wonderfully compelling, frightening and informative. The roller coaster of emotion trancends the screen as the tale unfolds and lays bare the raw emotion of deceit, selfish gratification and the complete disconnect Dragan perpetrates on two young girls of the story. Initially I was enraged that the subject of Dragan's abuse would dare give voice (and comfort) to her perpetrator, I'm left speechless at the end with the courage shown by Lucy. This feels as much a catharsis and healing endeavor as it does in seeking justice to right a decades-long evil committed on innocence and trust.
What a wonderful, grounded person. I totally agree with what she says about "a moment of pause", because we are so busy punishing the pervert that we think we are doing the child a great service by ripping that person away from him/her. This is the first time that the child very often knows that there was something wrong in this relationship and when everyone is raising their souls in shock, weeping and wailing, the child thinks THEY have been bad and somehow it is equally their fault. Of course the pervert has to be separated immediately, but there should be a time of supervised account that the pervert should face the child and exonerate them from any guilt and with guidance let the child see that he/she was or is an innocent child who has been led wrongly by the adult. A child does not know what is "wrong and illegal" in an adult world . It is up to the adults around children to lovingly lead them along the true innocent path of childhood. I hope this lady can continue along the path she is on now, knowing that what happened was wrong, but that she had no choice or say in the matter and yet has found peace. I would wish it for her sister, but she has a long hard road in front of her, poor dear.
I'm glad to have run across your film today, so much of what you described is true for me as well...a master at disassociation, to the point that I can also face my abuser and hold my complete composure. It is very interesting to find that my reaction is not really so rare, and in fact, I am normal.
yes... AND... at same time, sounds like he is... typically... victim blaming... n enabler blaming... instead of owning his responsibility... and at same time... well, still... fing yeah... smh ugh. GRRR. of course we have to hyper-vigilantly watch out for all children... all the time... given this sick insane f'd up hell world... (sigh) ****
The child might miss a father figure but they do not miss the sexual abuse. It takes time for a child to mature and really understand that they were just used, like an object, by the abuser
It's everyone's fault but his.Typical.There is no real love for the victim,only for their own pleasure.Any thing they say to the contrary is justification and denial.
This filth continues in homes around the world, nobody should have the right to touch you without permission! Life in prison for those who touch any children , they are not yours to destroy!
Lucy there has never been anything as on point as this that I have ever encountered in regards to the abuse I went through. Mine was with my biological father and it was something that I am still trying to heal from. I have forgiven him for myself and tried to have a relationship with him but I didn’t know how to guard myself from his manipulation and so every attempt at rebuilding a relationship with him failed. He finally passed away last year and it was almost like a weight was lifted from me bc the enigma of our relationship was finally put to rest. Thank you so very much for your candor and bravery. And even though I could see and even more feel his manipulation through the documentary I’d like to thank him as well for deciding to expose himself in such a way.
"But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea." Mathew 18:6.
This was very powerful. Thankyou for sharing your story Lucy 🖤 Came here from the Surviving Life channel and your humility is aspirational . Like you said, it would gain you nothing to harbour hate, but knowing that and living that are two different things and that you've managed it so successfully is a wonderful thing . I'm truly happy for you , you seem like you'd be a great person to know 😊 Keep sharing your truth!
Also, overjoyed this man is now in prison dealing with the consequences of his abhorrent actions. Those poor 100+ unknown girls he hurt. Glad there was SOME justice here, albeit late
He does blame me. Because he's delusional. That's part of the danger of paedophiles. They struggle to see the harm in what they do. That's why I made this film so that we can all see the craziness. But theres no point in me being emotional and damaged. What would that achieve? The only one who would suffer is me and my children with a damaged mother. I'd rather find sense and strength in myself to come out on top.
Lucy Witts yes...I should have read the description. What you’ve done is incredibly brave. And, I commend you for having such guts to meet with him. You certainly took your power back. I’m sorry this happened to you, really I am. No...you’re not at all weak. And, you deserve a bloody medal. Merry Christmas from my family to yours 🎄x
@@lucywitts17708 I'm so happy for you that you and your sister got justice. My mother put me in foster care when I was 7 without explaining what is happening, she did this so she could focus on her business which was quite successful then. I remember being jealous of her business because she called it her "baby" and said she has to spend much time now so that the business can then take care of her. She parentified me, telling me all about how my father was cheating on her with teenagers and even used me as a spy. The first night in foster care I had a bad dream that the my "foster father" was coming towards me, smiling and standing on the side of a hearse. I now this this was perhaps a premonition. Now my father has said it was my responsibility to not get sexually abused, at age 7!? Without him or my mother ever explaining how to protect myself. When the man started abusing me, I just froze! I resent that my mother and father never said sorry. I ended up a heroin addict because I can't deal with the pain and confusion I feel every day. I tried to kill myself when I was 12 and it was almost a completed suicide, a friend took me in a car to hospital where the doctors said I had taken over the lethal dose of amitriptyline but somehow I survived. When I woke up, my father didn't even ask why I had done this, he was just guilt tripping me immediately. I don't have anybody I talk to about this, the last time I told someone I was made to feel very bad. Thank you so much for making this documentary, you are such an incredible woman! I hate being called strong because people always said that to me as a child, when I was broken inside. But you are radiating an inner strength that I admire. Thank you so much. Much love and respect
Thank you for making this film.Pleople need to see these kind of things.If you haven't walked that path you wouldn't understand what that child goes through. I walked that same path with my own father and as an adult I understand the impact that has had on not only my life,but the life of every child who lives through sexual abuse.
That is then this is now. Society doesn't blame the child. Only the people close to the child does that. And no amount of pause moment is going to change that. Pause moment only allows the grown ups around the child to decide to handle the matter in house. This allows the criminal to get away with it and move on to other victims. Children today have more protection and access "that's when the parent or relative report it." Having a well informed child is the greatest thing for a mom to do for her babies. "Tell if they touch!" TELL TELL TELL! if mom doesn't listen tell the school nurse. go to the police. You gotta wonder why as a child it was ok for her to allow a grown man whom is her mothers lover and father figure to screw her. Why did she think it was normal. HELLO MOM'S This woman made me ill listening to her saying well I thought this was normal. Wait you didn't know having a grown man on top of you who sleeps the same way with your mom was not right?
This documentary should have millions of views, it is quite incredible for many reasons, first of all the strength Lucy has to confront him like this to obtain evidence. It;s just amazing, it brings people right into the sick intimacy that exists between the abuser and the abusee (that should be a word), I think this shows very accurately what it feels like to be targeted by one of these people. Just imagine dealing with this person when you are just a child?!??! It's just incredible how you made it through and got justice for you and your sister. So many abusees never get that, they have to see the abuser carry on happily with their lives facing no consequences.
I see many comments saying this documentary is normalizing his behaviour - I think these things need to be spoken about. The more time we take to understand the motivations the easier it becomes for us to recognise when it is happening and help prevent it from happening to others.
Agreed. I made a similar comment about it "normalizing" but I think it's not about her talking to him or so on, but more to the fact of not calling him out on his excuses and blame, along with the hugs, background music and laughter that makes it seem so disturbing & "accepting."
Although I have never had this conversation with my step father... whom abused me...I see him and myself in this interview. I don't think we can ever fully heal from these things. We can reach a place of forgiveness and disconnect from it but it changes our perceptions of others.
dragan must be arrested n locked in max security prison for rest of his fing pathetic sick 'life...' if there r any ways of him n/or any others similar to him, authentically repenting, owning their responsibility n accepting overdue commensurate consequences commanded them towards rightfully atoning his/their crimes... if there r any ways such a lost vile evil criminal heinous creep low life demon to reach for consciousness health healing recovery wellness accountability doing all the real fing integral work on themselves, in order towards them making authentic transcendental amends... etc etc... (honestly, it would def be way beyond fing miraculous n i'd have a VERY impossible time trusting they r not just continuing their sadistic hubris filled dangerous threatening deceitful fraudulence... if any of the psycho-socio-path pedo criminal predatory abuser narcissistic nutcases ever authentically gave any shits ever n actually thoroughly self analyzed n examined their criminality n the disastrous n catastrophic harmful damaging impacts they perpetrate against others whom they commit crimes against... n did any essential work on themselves to at all ever better themselves; essentially changing transforming towards worthwhile valuable essential necessary healing conscious responsible honorable respectful humane rightful recovery, sanity, decency, wellness, lawfulness, trustworthiness, goodness... etc etc... i mean... they would have to remain removed from society cuz they must be commanded due commensurate consequences n be made to pay towards amending their severe unpardonable crimes way too many dangerous sick insane vile pedo criminals r on the loose, r wrongfully protected n insidiously infiltrated into seemingly omnipotence; especially they seem to be infecting positions of 'power,' 'authority' n in 'agencies' that r supposedly occupying positions that r claiming to 'serve n protect children,' n 'serve n protect justice,' n claiming to 'target severe criminals such as heinous pedophiles, n command due commensurate consequences at n against criminals towards amending their severe crimes...' pedo criminals have infiltrated 'governmental bodies,' they have infiltrated 'media,' they have infiltrated 'religion,' 'education,' they have infiltrated... on n on; so on n so forth... etc etc... NOT AT ALL OK. children r being targeted exploited enslaved used abused traumatized terrorized tortured commodified monetized harvested endangered threatened groomed manipulated deceived sexualized perpetrated against stalked kidnapped taken stolen murdered sacrificed cannibalized discarded etc etc... by fing heinous pedo criminals... it is right up there on top; as one of thee worst if not thee worst most catastrophic beyond challenging horrific unmanageable overwhelming sick insane MEGA SCALE world PERVasive epidemic MAJOR URGENT EMERGENCY problems (still...) in this world, currently....!??! #StopAbuseCrimesNOW!!!! ****
That isn't the case for all abuse victims, the ones who have been physically permanently damaged and tortured cannot sit in a room and negotiate a separation with the abuser.
Of course! There is no one stop fix all solution. If there was, there would be no need for finding options. Everyone has their own experience and some groups within that very large umbrella do not experience violence and sadism. I was kinda hoping that it was clear that I referred to the non-violence sector. I clearly failed in making that clear.
Thank you so much for this outstanding, incredibly hard opus@@lucywitts17708. It's so unfortunate that people are still so much in denial about the scale of paedophilia, they don't realise it's at the end of their street at the most. The societal refusal to see the bigger picture, to recognize, treat and prevent paedophiles from offending is not through punitive actions. That's simply too late. Thank you for this fantastic work, I wish your documentary had more exposure, your voice is so important.
I do believe the mother said that, however she didn’t have bad intentions. They were non-conformist type of family and I think the mother meant for her children to embrace that naked bodies are natural etc-.
I'm thankful that I was not sexually abused as a child but did have a very mentally abusive alcoholic father and just like the physical abuse it has it's devastating effects on you for life. People tend to think you dwell on the past but the truth is in my case I don't. It is the simple fact that the moulding of the past builds the platform of today. The crucial thing I learned in life though is you have to ultimately forgive (even though you don't want anything to do with them) those who have wronged you. If you hold hatred in you for long enough you will become the very thing you hated to begin with. I became my mentally abusive father but luckily I learned this before I messed somebody's life up forever and/or in my fathers case the substance you use (I got on drugs) kills you.
i agree. she must be a very strong person. i get her mindset and admire that. but hugging him? (at the end) no no no..., thats a bridge too far for me. it would have made me sick to the core....
Mother’s please please please stop trusting men with your children!!!!!!!!!, my GOD when will some women learn?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? AND I DO NOT BELIEVE THAT THAT MOTHER DID NOT KNOW WHAT WAS GOING ON!!!!!!
No she flat out says she wasn't looking, and refused to think anything bad. He was "Dad". Different times, sheltered times. Peoples didn't have the access to information that's available today. So sad..
@@dangagne8870People DIDN'T WANT TO KNOW. Libraries and research into pedophilia goes back to literal Ancient humanity. No matter the time there is NO EXCUSE to NOT LISTEN AND BELIEVE YOUR CHILD and to not do your research.
What's normal about walking Round naked in front of a stepfather well done to the interviewer who didn't believe what she is saying about the abuse she is still protecting him and her mother today what a shame
Sounds like he was still trying to shift most of the blame on her until the end of the document. She seems to be an amazing and brave person. Very forgiving. Very humbling to watch. I wish that more victims could get this kind of acknowledgment of their abuse by the abuser. God Bless!
This program was really well done. No spoilers! I’m full of admiration for Lucy. To be an advocate for victims yet not demonise the perpetrators is a difficult position to be in. But she is right. The vulnerable child has been groomed to think the adult is the most important thing in their life, then their world is ripped apart, that person is taken away & they are left with nothing but shame. Lucy, May others find the peace you have and go on to help others as you are doing. Thank you.
IT'S JUST TOO BAD SHE COULDN'T HAVE CAPTURED HIM AT HER DESERT INTERVIEW,BURIED HIM UP TO HIS HEAD WHERE HE COULDN'T GET AWAY,LIKE THE APACHES WOULD DO.....AND LEAVE HIM THERE ALONE TO HIS MUCH DESERVED FATE...(P.S.HE'S APTLY NAMED......TELL ME WHERE HE LIVES......THERE'S STILL TIME !!!)
I am astonished at her composure and strength, not only in the video, but the replies to some of these comments. Truly amazing woman, shows us all there is hope.
But this is exactly how grooming goes for most children. This video isn't condoning the "normality" of what transpired , one has to take into account that in that time and place there were very liberal hippie views back then, free love, freedom of expression and this is that dynamic. There weren't many safeguards in place in those times. My own mother was a hippie and I was raised around them. And I was very lucky indeed that I was never interfered with but from this lense I surly could have been. Remove violence, remove fear and yes I am indeed lucky. Unfortunately, I was victimized later at 14 years old.
As sickening as this story was, I am thankful for it. So many parents are only focused on "stranger danger", when odds are their family knows the predator who will victimize their child. We need to teach parents and caregivers better, to hopefully identify someone trying to take advantage of a vulnerable child BEFORE it happens. I have zero sympathy for pedophiles, even the ones who abused themselves. When someone's sexual Attraction and desire becomes fixated on domineering and abusing the most vulnerable in our society, they are no better than rabid dogs, and need to be EXECUTED as such!
Classic rock Lover if I had attraction to children...I’d put a gun in my mouth and pull the trigger. These paedophiles know how morally and fundamentally disgusting this is, yet they leave victim after victim in their wake. I’d rather be dead. You’re right,Netherland predators are usually trusted people. God....it makes me so angry.
Thank you for sharing this. It helped me a lot. The problem is really: It didn't feel wrong. When it happends theres some kind of 'natural behavior' in it. I felt joy and happiness to be the one in charge. I was feeling like a princess and was treated as this. And no; it wasnt all about the Sex. It felt like a nearly normal, good relationship of two adults. !!! But with the fucking fact I wasnt adult. I was a child !!! For me I was aware of all of this and I was encuraging him (no joke, I ask him to have sex). I came into puberty and wanted to have the closest person to explore sexuality with. It felt and still feels natural to me. Funny thing was: Sex was awesome. I felt very good, and wanted this too. BUT with 31 i realized, when people told me that wasnt normal and i started to listen, that he groomed and gaslighted me all the time. Absolute successfully. And now i look back and ask myself the question: What did he do just for Sex? What did he do out of pure giving love? And wheres the seperation? The desperating point is: both work absolutely together. I will never know. When the abuser in the video sais: 'I groomed you to be my wife at age of 18' I was shocked. My stepdad promised to merry me at age of 18. But never did. But lost interest. I absolutely feel torn. I guess thats what many persons with abusive past do feel like. I often ask myself, if I am the cause - or the beginning of his pedophile tendencies, or if i was just the next in line. I often ask myself: Am I guilty when he goes on? I will never know if he really loved me, and sex was just a form of addition or if he really aimed for it. The thing i know is: I loved him. I loved him listening for me, I loved him hugging me, I loved him supporting me in any way ever possible. I needed encouragement so desperately. I needed someone beliving in me, caring for me. He abused my needs. I did go to police with age of 31. He was/is a school teacher working with children. I didnt wanted to end them like me, doubting if they deserved love without payment of sex. My Mum knew it all the time, but said to police id lie (she was to hurt I never wanted to be with her in my youth but him) . Older friends accused me to create storries, because they didnt want to have to do something with it. Last thing I know is, that he was together with a woman with a female child. I did warn them. Also he betrayed that women with and other one, having a female child... I wanted to stop this but failed in the end. However im not sorry. I did the right thing for my feelings and tried to help furure victims. My 'family' fell appart. I never spoke with any of them again. No one. Especially not with my mum. I hope at least, I could help some of the people who also go to police. And i wish all victims to be strong and regenerate. Your not to be sexualized. Youre to be loved.
Did she LAUGH just now when he said, "I love you, though it's no longer sexual"? 🤯 Yeah, that's a riot. It's no longer sexual bcuz she's WAY TOO OLD FOR HIM NOW. Wow, that was funny to her? 🤮 If he said that to me, Id punch him in the mouth.
It may be a trauma response. I was sexually abused for years as a child and I’ve noticed that in situations where I feel uncomfortable I give a fake laugh or a giggle. It may be the same for her.
Read the description. She did all this to get him to admit to his crimes and pattern of abuse so he could be convicted and thrown in prison, which he was, in part because of this interview. What she did was incredibly brave to sit through that without reacting in order to get him to talk further about the abuse to get further evidence. Crazy how many people are judging her and her mom in the comments when all the context is in the description.
I was sexually abused by my stepfather from age 8-15 my mother didn’t believe me I went crazy for a while I’m 47 now and suffer from ptsd among other things My boyfriend doesn’t understand why I can’t let it go and nether do I
I'm 64 and I'd love to "Let it go".Truth is ,it won't let me go.It altered my life and it's so much a part of it.I always felt my reality was so different to everyone else.If your boyfriend has difficulty understanding,he needs to watch the True Vision video "Chosen" about 3 boys at Caldicott school. .It won a BAFTA documentary award in 2009.The boys are men now ,and recount their experiences and explain why it took so long for the truth to surface.
My mother would always tell me I have a black heart .. well when ur father touches u and u inform your mother and she does nothing .. what's to be expected .. no child should grow up wanting to poison their father .. he finally past last year (of natural causes) and my mom past 5 yrs ago and sadly I dont feel pain or a loss cuz how can u miss something you never had (love & protection from either one of your parents)
Ronica, I responded to your comment but in the wrong spot. I don't know how to edit that, esp at 3.30am lol.. Please see below the Lano Del Ray comment. I'll fix it tomorrow.. Just wanted to send you well wishes x @RONICA
Her mother and him should be locked up for life. Let them loose in prison because they hate pedophiles in prison. Her mother is sick. Why isn't she angry?
I am watching this now, and want to thank you for putting this forward. It is a really interesting to think about how the child's perspective. I am so glad that this is being discussed more openly. Thank you for your voice and your courage to look at it and speak.
If you mean that the subject of this documentary is repulsive, you are right. But this documentary is excellent... in its courage, in its intent to help others in similar abuses and in its production. Well done Victoria Witts👍🏻
@vids - that’s your interpretation of it, all I see is yet another documentary attempting to normalise noncing - giving a platform for victim blaming. This documentary is as already stated REPULSIVE.
There is no excuse for his behavior but she may have very well known and conspired in some way whether consciously or subconsciously. It isn't uncommon.
That's the pedophile mindset. They want to believe that the children are "asking for it". It's sick and twisted but that's the rationale they are carrying around.
Here we have 100% honesty coming out! Credit where due! It seems the general public are so ignorant, thick and screwed up in their outlook. Agree with Lucy (and the psychologist) that it’s a worldwide issue and instead of the general public being single-minded it’s an issue that needs sorting out properly, it’s the only way to get to the bottom of it otherwise too many people being abused will go unnoticed!
@@lucywitts17708 100% true You can’t change what’s happened, only learn from it. I respect his honesty and your honesty! I didn’t think the interviewer was much good even though he was a nice chap.
I feel that this is a beautifully done video/story of a topic that is WAY to common. Lucy I hope this has helped you and those affected start/continue to heal.
I have a nephew who touched my finger after I cut it. I came unglued yelling at him he should never ever touch someone's blood. It was the 80s and the fear I felt was about aids. This guy could have acted in the same manner plain and simple. Kids are naturally curious, but we are the adults and need to teach when they do something wrong. He let it happen, what a failure at being a role model. A failure at being a person. No excuses.
In the beginning of the video, he explains he told the child not to touch his penis...The child's mom said it was okay! Go back and view again, but, either way, they should both have been responsible adults and differentiated between a child's curiosity, and an adult taking advantage of that...Both are condemned...
Karen Contestabile it’s worth having a read of her blog in the description as it explains what actually happened in that moment. Her Mum told him don’t make a big deal of it so as not to cause more curiosity and don’t make sudden moves as she was half asleep and her mum quickly took her back to bed , waited until she fell asleep. He choose to turn this into a fantasy that the mother encouraged him. He blames the mother for getting him started. Just FYI she also explains before this moment she has not had any contact or spoken to him since it was all discovered when she was younger. He choose that version of the story , after all the things he has done to her and has since raped over 100 children, to be the first thing he told her. Sick. She did this film to help put him away and in the end he got 90 years.
What a woman. No one ever wants to hear from the perpetrator. We should because we need to know why. People jist get angry and call them 'sickos' or 'evil' without understanding why they do what they do. You can't stop something you don't understand and this behavior needs to be stopped, so therefore it must be understood. You have done more in this documentary than what the news and media have done in 100 years. I wish you the best and hope you have a good life Lucy! Tom x
People have been interviewing sex offenders for a while. We already have a pretty good idea how many operate. A lot of them fucking suck and try justifying their belief by saying the relationship was consensual. The guy in the video seems like a piece of shit and should get a roundhouse kick to the ribs.
I applaud the sharing, and the honesty, an honesty that likely includes some self deception that is necessary to preserve a sense of self. It seems that everyone is doing the best they can. It's the mother I wonder about - I think her fear of what would she do if her suspicions became a reality, kept her silent, and probably in past & current denial. Namaste 🙏
Lucy you've shown great courage throughout the process of making this public documentary, you know a lot of these realities are hard for people who've not experienced abuse and grooming to understand, or even want to understand. I'm a survivor who suffered the use of violence within the coercion and grooming, if you see, and even today as an adult who understands all that, it's still difficult to not want to go "home" when I face a serious problem or upset... Like that person will make it all better, now to most people and honestly to myself that seems absurd, and it makes you feel even more guilt, its very strange thing to try to explain, that even when there's awful violence you can still have this pulling back feeling, when you face difficulties in life.... It's a hugely brave thing to talk about this, I'm finding it difficult writing this anonymously let alone publically, I guess it brings up that false guilt, and the why am I wanting that person's help after all they've done, thoughts etc.. And it's hard when at the time you may defend that person, I did even with the violent nature of it all I did, for various reasons, society finds that very unsettling and it is, it's all unsettling and even decades after it unsettles me to acknowledge this just in written word, But its vital that adults and society come to understand this issue in its full context, if we want to protect children. I don't agree with idea of the breaking of contact slowly in controlled way, as such, that scares me, but I do understand all the reasons you give for that suggestion, I just don't know how that would work, or how that would've or would impact survivors its so hard. I just wanted to say thank you for being brave enough to bring the difficult emotional parts of this to public view, as its so important, so from me to you, Thank You
Wow what a powerful documentary much respect for being able to tell this story with such grace and intelligence this should never happen to anyone Shame on any adult who can engage in or who overlooks such horrendous sexual abuse it’s bloody outrageous
I have three kids to a man who had been abused when he was a child and it was destroying him inside I didn't know what was wrong for most of the 16 years we were with each other but I knew there was something wrong and he didn't get the help he needed because of shame which is why I think this is such a powerful film that will help alot of people who struggle to understand why and blame themselves for what had happened so I think it's so educational to see how all parties involved in this especially because it was affecting the whole family so thankful for talking so openly about this and it's so inspiring for people who are trying to deal with this and how to get the help they need instead of keeping it a secret that eats away at you
Let me interview him in the desert
I'm in.
I join too......
Joshua Tree is a very nice area.
Even when these sick creeps get caught most do not get the proper punishment...20 years jail should be minium and standard....to use a
penis as a weapon is no different than using a gun or fists....long term damage is done
Then leave him there
BREAKING NEWS: THE VERDICT IS IN!
Dragan Vujicin was found guilty this morning of 10 counts of Rape and Child Trafficking in the Swakopmund Magistrate Court. His bail was revoked and he was immediately remanded back into custody. There will be no more victims.
Now the long journey begins for his victims to come to terms with their experiences. But at least they rest with the knowledge that they did all they could and he is no threat to any more children.
❤
This makes me happy
I'm so proud of you Lucy. Hopefully you can put the pieces back together now and start living the life you wanted. Bless❤️
Great news I hope healing comes to you all
Congrats. You are a wonderful woman. Feel happy not sad be happy!
When you forgive someone who hurt you it's not for them it's for you.
You sound like Jesus, shut up - cause you are not him:)....its too painfull, still.
Finishing this doc has given me a lot to think about with my own Step-father and the abuse I've endured from 6 to 20 yrs old. As far as how she carries herself after it all. How aware she is of herself. It's inspiring and uplifting.
A 68-YEAR-OLD man who was found guilty on charges of child rape and trafficking two weeks ago received prison terms totalling 90 years with his sentencing at Swakopmund today.
Swakopmund Regional Court magistrate Gayor Poulton sentenced the Serbian-born Dragan Vujicin this afternoon (Friday) at the coastal town.
He’s saying that the mothers need to keep an eye on their children more. How about a grown ass man not touching a child in any kind of sexual way?
As long as he is not guilty, I guess. Horrible and disgusting
Master deflector
Very interesting. My sister was molested by my mother's boyfriend when she was very young. I only remember the baseball bat my mother took to him but at the time didn't understand why. I do now.
Good on your mother .
I love your mom...don’t know her but I love her! ❤️
His nonchalant way of him explaining “the process” it’s making me physically ill. This man is a born monster.
If you are a parent that's the very reason you NEED to listen and learn. Never think for a minute that you know better. You'll find yourself taken for the fool faster than you can say it
Indeed Liz he's vile nothing else needs saying💯
A narc me thinks.. can comprehend him.. users of all. Hes a defo.. a b c narc..
The relationship between an abuser and their victim is a complex one and this film demonstrates this very effectively. This woman is still under the control of her abuser. Never believe a word they say, they are skilled manipulators and will tell you exactly what you want to hear. It's a shame that he is free and able to continue his abuse.
I agree with you 100% - except that I can assure you I am not under his control in any way. When I interviewed him, it was the first time I saw him since the day the secret came out. I am STILL fighting to get him convicted and sent to jail because I do believe that it the only place he should be. But, 5 years on, I'm still fighting.
is there a petition to sign to assist somehow in locking him away in prison for life, where he belongs, lucy?
@@beijaflor1908 if you read the description, you'll see he is in prison where he should be. ;)
Mother knew, a good mother would know and the fact that your mother didn't unpack the events indicates that she knew
WTF! Saying that a 3 yr old girl was "so mature, and into that particular thing"????!!! (16:25), ..."You were 3 years old, but YOU ACTED like you had all the experience in the world"...WTF IS THAT!!! SOOOOO disturbing!!! What a piece of SH*T!
"We need to forgive each other" -Dragon.
Wait, what did she do? Typical manipulative grooming psychology
We should burn them a live. He is disgusting and lying.
Came here from Surving Life channel. Enjoyed your interview with Ron. As a hypervigelant parent, I found this very insightful and helpful in protecting my daughter to the best of my abilities.💖
You dont really have to be "hypervigilant" to keep your daughter safe from a step-father. Too many women will take a man and know nothing about him. Please do not be overly protective of your daughter. I have seen first hand that paranoia parenting can be worse than actual abuse. Never being allowed to do anything, not allowed to have a phone, parents constantly checking the phone, going through room, etc. Just have a healthy relationship with your daughter.
I'm a child abuse survivor & this is the best, most honestly detailed documentary about itr I've ever seen. It has answered & asked so many questions, that have just been left as confusion in my head. Amazing, absolutely amazing!!!
Isn't it? I think the sisters and mother are very brave.
@@angusmacskye4476 100%. To face the past in the the way they have, n to rationally talk about the effects like trhis, is amazing...
Thank you. You're welcome.
@@lucywitts17708 Thank you...
I don’t think I’ve ever seen a documentary About pedophiles where the pedophile explains in such detail how they go about choosing and grooming their victims. It’s crazy to listen to him talking so non chalantly
That was the point of sucking up my own emotions / feelings / anxieties and getting this done and out there. We need to LISTEN and learn so we can act appropriately. What we are currently doing as society is doing nothing but sending these people into the shadows. Bring them out so we can actually address it properly and like adults... without emotion getting in the way.
Very good documentary.explains all sides.dragon made it seem to be victim.
@@lucywitts17708 That's right. I get your point. If society encourages them to come out and seek help (without rebuke), then our children will be much safer. A safwr world for us really. I know it sounds crazy but that would be a potentially good solution to the paedophilia problem. The number of child victims will definitely be reduced. But what treatment is out there for them? Doesn't seem like anything promising really at the moment. Evidence states that even with therapy, there is no guarantee that the person will not re-offend again, it only has a temporary effect. The paedophilia thinking in their brain is a life-long thing. Those afflicted with the mental health problem will always think like that up until their last day on earth. It has no cure because it has to do with the brain, the brain setting abnormal. Just like other mental illnesses such as schizophrenia etc are life-long. You just have to manage it. Cannot be cured at least right now. If I could make a wish, it would be for paedophilia to have a "definite" cure. Something as simple as popping a pill or undergoing a brain surgery and it is gone forever. That would really make me happy. Because as a former child abuse victim and after having known and even loved a paedophile, he was my best friend (sometimes they are family, close family and it is not something that u discover right away because majority are very good at hiding it to protect themselves from being arrested). I realised that they are actually normal regular human beings like you and I, not psychopaths like how the media likes to portray it, no different at all to any one of us, except for the illness happening in their brains. The sick sexual mentality- which I believe that they genuinely do not know or recognise it as abnormal or wrong, because that is what their brain tells them, that it is right. The way we think is controlled by our brain. Not we controlling our brains. This is why they are helpless at the problem. They cannot help offending and even re-offending sometimes even whilst being on the available treatments mostly psychotherapy (known as relapse). Whilst locked up in jail they are physically and sexually away from children, however research has shown that "this" has still not 'cured' them of the abnormal thoughts, the brain hasn't stopped thinking abnormally. It's going to need more than just locking them up. Options include therapy whilst in cell and please people donate to research funding the cure for paedophilia. Donate, set up a research institute yourselves. Make this world a better place for us all. Encourage anyone u know to seek help and the govt please stop focusing on locking paedophiles up, rather focus more on spending money on health research for these people. They are everywhere due to being genetic and the problem is getting worse by the year. No one steps out for treatment as the therapists themselves (by law) will ring the police to come and imprison them at the clinic once they start to confess their feelings out and what they have done.
(A mental illness just like other mental illnesses such as depression and schizophrenia etc). Does not need discriminating here, that's just the way I see it. It is so rampant worldwide at such a rate that I think that there has to be a genetic/inherited component to it. It is important for people to know that paedophilia is "mostly" self-discovered and not chosen by the person. Both the paedophile (who self-discovers his ill-manner of thinking/sexual attraction to kids during puberty and cannot seek any help or tell anyone for support due to the fear of him being arrested) and the poor innocent children who fall victim to his illness, in my opinion are both sufferers. Sad.
@@aojuri01 death sounds like a good solution for their problem.
Interesting how he was STILL trying to groom her in her interview with him. It was so obvious he was hoping she would have "feelings" for him. SO crazy that this man is out gawking at children in the street!!! What the actual f'ck
He first blames her then blames her mother ... what a load of bollocks.
This is making me sick!
It seems to be normalizing an adult raping a child! WTH!!!!
That will NEVER be normal no matter how it’s portrayed! It destroys children’s lives for the pleasure of the sick adult
Heartbreaking to think it would be acceptable to take a child’s innocence for ANY reason!
Me too. It makes men sick too. wow...now he's connecting spirit to it all. They are certainly trying to make this gross perversion as normal. They want age of consent to be age 3. I wonder how old she was when he had intercourse with her. I heard so very ugly stories about girls being raped by father, brothers, uncles and friends. Those poor girls are torn apart inside. bladders, bowels. I don't know what else.
Someone here commented that “this documentary is repulsive”. My reply : “if you mean the subject of the documentary is repulsive, you are right. But this documentary is EXCELLENT in its courage, in its intent to help others in similar abuses and its production” Thank you Victoria and everyone who helped stand with you to do this, especially your husband. I can imagine he must be one of the main reasons for your present successful journey to health and peace. Keep it up and keep going. I’ve read most of your personal replies and they are all excellent and so genuine. God bless.✊🏼👍🏻
Hi! Thank you for your comment. You are absolutely spot on. The subject matter is repulsive. But it is so important that we talk about it openly to break the walls of secrecy. I do have an incredible husband and children. My husband has stood by me and held my hand through it all. He has held me up when I needed him to and he has stood close beside me for support when I needed and wanted to stand alone. Similarly, my children. My children have had to endure my growth and the pain that that growth inflicted. They have turned a forgiving cheek when I have been over cautious and sheltering of them because they have understood that I do it to protect them. They have understood my fears - particularly online - and reassure me of their safety with more information than I probably need to make me feel their safety and their caution. They have understood that sleepovers are simply not allowed until they were able to protect themselves. I put a lot more pressure on them because of my fears and caution - but I have never kept my past secret from them. They have both seen this film and whilst they don't understand it all, they do understand that Mummy grew up in a damaging situation and that because of that, they are protected in the way that they are. My husband is the balance in that scale. When our children have felt I'm being over-cautious and clipping their wings, they discuss it with dad and then together they reassure me. He has been my yardstick, my rock, my tissue, my friend and everything in between. My youngest is only chuffed that his mum is on UA-cam and that's apparently so cool.
Wow! What a powerful documentary! And totally 100% agree with you that confronting it head one is the right thing to do. What predators fear most is the light of day so shedding light on their thoughts, their tactics, their motivations is the right thing to do. For too long we've hidden behind shame and fear of scandal and let these types of people thrive! Well done.
where did he show any fear of her or any regret for his actions? Lucy was simply an object that he used.
He is blaming her and continues to manipulate her. “She wanted to and her Mother said it was ok.” I seriously doubt that. He is a sick bastard who should be in prison
Pedos are pathological liars. All abusers and manipulators of the truth are.
How the fuck can she sit there with him so casually? This is absurd.
i thought the same!
Maybe she is at a good place in her life where she can sit and listen to him. Just because she was a victim doesnt mean she should allow herself to be victimized by him for the rest of her life
SuperMomIAM you have hit the nail on the head.
Lucy Witts but why laugh with him.
Or maybe heres a better reason / reasons... Closure ? And CLOSURE WITH NAILS IN HIS PERVERBIAL COFFIN ?? as in mr. Cluster b just told all on camera... Now his head wrecking fat ass in slammed up for his mess and trafficing...
Wuh huh huh huh ! He a narc though in my eyes and probably love winding up others in there..
He sounds reallllly clumsy .. so might have a accident reallly quick.. or get wat a narc needs.. resistance.. or get top trumped by a worse cluster b peep. . . These peeps are fierce.. i comprehend him and his @ 5 lies .. text book cluster b.. imo.. would not make sense other wise... Hes so hounest ish.. its wierd.. he does lie to explain.. trow mum under bus/ blame mom for " trigger " pfft ! Imo..
Lions lieing with lambs.. no love / care.. empathy for others.. others are not allowed be seperate from there view of them...
" Deficiency in responcibility... ". " Everyone elses fault.." if caught only..
Cluster b bs...
The mother knew everything ,even though the daughter would love to deny that fact. The mother’s answers gave her away-the reason she didn’t want to ask her daughter what happened is a very classic way of burrying eveything and not wanting to be questioned of her role in the whole thing. Every mother has an instinct,some ignore it to stay with the man and act shocked when it finally comes out,but I can assure you all of that wouldn’t have gone on without the mother not having an incling. These men choose weak vulnerable women but that doesn’t mean the women are oblivious to what’s happening, they simply turn a blind eye cos for some women the men/relationship means more than the child so they protect the relationship and not the child. Also the daughter believing her mother is natural way of protecting herself cos the alternative is knowing that her mother gave him access,and that’s hard to accept for anyone.
Lucy has been completely brainwashed and is definitely not healed from her trauma. She has dissociated herself from her 2-12 year old self and cannot even see the damage that has taken root.
You speak with such absolution as though you "know" this "definitely". I would suggest that this is a gross assumption and would go further to say that your assumption could not be further from the truth.
It is interesting to hear your opinion though. But let's not forget that that's what it is. It is not "definitely" fact it is very much your opinion.
You cant make that opinion unless you are the person experiencing it.
One sister is suffering far more than the other here.. sickening stories..
My god, after reading the description and watching the documentary, Dragan is incredibly self absorbed and unable to take responsibility. The way he explains everything, he’s basically made it seem like it was the girls’ fault and he had no choice to.
Ahsklabdkaldjla ugh it’s just so gross the way he talks.
I can see this is a hard video but it is eye opening and might help people better protect their children. Thanks for making it.
That was emotionally taxing to watch. They never seem like complete monsters and that’s the point, they even manipulate the watcher into thinking that they aren’t so bad until you actually try to wrap your head around their actual crime when a child is only 2 years old. Strong lady
Extraordinary, outstanding film ... with honesty, compassion and horror. God bless you Lucy for sharing this experience - may it guide and help other victims of this horrific abuse.
I can so relate to this video because my biological father doing the same BUT my mother knew all along what has happened. And she told me that she threatened to leave him (with the 4 children) if he didn't stop abusing me. And she told me (after he died of course) that he responded with "Diane is mine to f**k whenever I want." (Sorry if I offended anyone).
I reported him several years later, he was convicted to 3 yrs in prison to which many people were seriously upset for 15+yrs of sexual abuse.
It has marked me for life on many levels emotionally, sexually, spiritually. I live alone now for over 19yrs and can't get sexual or emotional closeness for I've lost trust in people. Dosen't mean that I don't long for closeness, I just can't trust.
Wonderful video. Thank you
I literally know how you feel. Whilst i do still try to love and have a partner, it never seems to go well. I myself seem to have a knack for still attracting the 'wrong sort' if you will.. They end up being or doing the very things i can't stand (lying quite badly, cheating, not really wanting to be monogamous, etc etc..) and my bad judge of character and attraction to the wrong people seems to stem from the corruption and abuse i was subject to as a child.. Most people can't really comprehend or fathom what effect this can have on some in the long term. Whilst on the surface i seem to have "survived" quite well, sure i've done much better than some but far worse than others! I congratulate both you and the creator of this video for being so brave. Thank you too!
Only after I realized the guilt and shame I carried were not mine to own or carry, was I freed from my childhood abuse.
Give yourself the gift of forgiveness, so as not to stain your soul with the same stain as the peadophile. We do this not for the peadophile but for ourselves.
Only after doing this for myself was I able to learn to trust and have a 17 year relationship with a wonderful caring man who was able to help me heal, God rest his soul, I miss him and will forever, RIP shayne
Trust is so Hard. And we live in a very sexualized World,,,so No one tales the time to get to know each other. You are not alone in No longer coping with the relations available.
I'm so sorry that you have spent so much time alone. I get that. I really do. I consider myself so fortunate not to have had that manifestation to that level. But I can 100% appreciate how that can be so. x
@@c.a.greene8395 The gift of forgiveness. Well put - I like that. And THAT is what that
hug is all about. It's my gift to me. It's my forgiveness of myself and also of him. I am free.
Here from your interview on Surviving Life. Just starting the documentary, so not much to say. You are such a strong person. To be able to sit down and have a civil conversation takes so much strength.
I’ve been struggling a lot in my own journey of healing. This came at a really important time. Thank you for sharing your journey.
@marloon3 It's really important to realise that I have been actively walking on my journey of self discovery, self forgiveness and understanding for at least 30 years now. It has taken me a L O N G time to be okay with it all and to have the ability to draw a constructive perspective removed from my person.
Take your time. Baby steps. You will get through it. The only advice I can give you that I wish people had given me, was be conscious of the language you use with yourself and pay absolutely no attention to what other people say or how people expect you to feel or react or behave.
Be true to yourself. Only you know your truth.
one moment the mother says she knew nothing and then she actually admits that she did not know how to handle things because she was in love with him ?? wtf
Shelley Street good look
Yes. I noticed that too.
My abuse was very similar to yours in that it started when I was very very young, and never felt like abuse while it was happening. It was a slow evolution where this person becomes the most special adult in your life and the most trusted adult. I remember being 6 and taking car rides with my abuser where we would have long conversations about his childhood and how he was also groomed (although he portrayed it as being a willing participant). He was my best friend. It wasn’t until I was older and began to understand that our interactions were abnormal that I realized what was happening, however, up until that time it did not feel abusive or harmful. I’ve toiled with the juxtaposition of feeling love and empathy while also feeling anger and disgust for this man that was the only benevolent father figure in my life.
I can understand how some people cant wrap their head around the level of calm and astuteness that you had while interviewing your abuser, because not everyone has the same type of abuser. It’s unconscionable to comprehend unless you were groomed in a similar fashion.
This is strange as hell.
Ive never seen a documentary on pedophelia like this one! So brutally honest and very inciteful as far as the "grooming" aspects of pedophelia go. I cannot help but feel as if something is missing,however. I do not mean intentionally left out but perhaps more could be included about your reaching out to Psychologists,more specifics about certain encounters(I know that sounds odd but to someone like me,who has never been sexually abused it is so difficult to put into perspective) and more about your mother and her true feelings and intuitions. This was very sad,shocking and I feel for any victim of sex abuse. I also question your mother and her handling of the entire situation. Thank you for uploading this. Maybe Part 2 would be just as educational and interesting. Bless!
Thank you Jane, I appreciate this comment. I am considering a part 2 - but to be honest the pain that I have to go through to do the edits is extremely taxing on me and the vial abuse that I receive from people's ignorant comments affect me deeply - even though I wish I could say I was a cold heartless person who didn't care a damn. I don't regret making the film and I never will. But I do regret reading the comments. If you have specific questions you are welcome to contact me via email (my contact details are in the description) and I'd be more than happy to give you as much further insight that you require or need. I just do believe at the moment that for now I have given enough of 'me' to the trolls of society.
What I want to know is WHY is paedophilia so widespread? WHY are there so many paedophiles? What is the root cause or IS there a root cause? I agree we have to start learning to understand why this happens in the first place.
Its controversial and not my own opinion but consider when a girl reaches child bearing age. What 12/13? Now consider pornography, its shaven clean (child like). Why adults are attracted to babies. Goodness knows. I can only imagine its related to innocence, vulnerability
Lucy there is so much i could say... i was abused, not for a sustained amount of time but it was a family member who also abused me more emotionally. I thought i had got over it but it actually screwed up my life. I'm currently having emdr therapy. Anyway, this is not about me but you and i felt very sad and shed some tears that you were such a beautiful innocent baby and it was all taken from you. I do understand that it must have been so hard after you had such a connection with him. From the bottom of my heart i wish you full healing and a happy happy life, lots of love and hugs xxx
I'm sorry you had bad experiences too. Emotional abuse is often as damaging as physical abuse - especially because it's so hard to put a finger on and identify. I'm pleased you're receiving help. That's important. Unpack it. Process it. Understand it. And then take back your power. Good on you!!
Im crying watching this. He groomed your entire family. That he says you even looked like you enjoyed it. How awful. He made you feel so extremely special to him that you willingly accepted the abuse. This is what happened to me. It took me 40 years to twll someone.
Just hearing him talk ! Omg my skin is crawling!
This is very fucking disturbing!!!
I know that this was filmed in 2017, but I came across this through Surviving Life channel, and I have to acknowledge that im literally tearing up watching thee incredible amount of kindness, forgiveness, that you possess in your heart, and your slightly different perspective on these kinds of issues that most do not have. This is how you are able to move on and enjoy life without any hatred. Reading some of these comments are so negative, people forget that pedophilia is a preference developed for some at a young age or develops through religious sexual repression, and evolves over time, that is almost impossible to control . Violence against these individuals is not the answer. In no way am I justifying acts of pedophilia. I also appreciate how patient you were able to listen to him speak. You are amazing, and I hope to see future projects on these topics. Thankyou for this.
Evil grows because the good do nothing
New motto.. THIS IS SOMETHING I NEED TO LIVE BY. THEY GET AWAY WITH MURDER. YOUR RIGHT. THANK YOU!! :(
I Don't know what to do with a demon I know.. but me not doing nothing is killing me on the inside. I wish I could expose him to the world but no one would believe me how evil he really is :(
No he's not a pedo but he is a predator unfortunately. Hardest part was realizing that I was never loved and I have nothing. He destroyed my values and murdered my spirit and I ended up on the streets alone😭
Scared
Everything gone
I was abandoned with NO CLOSER
over night.
Its still tramatic to put in my thoughts .. I see so many similar traits in Dragon as I do my ex.
Soulless walking dead, bag of bones! Real life vampires that suck the life out of you. They have no reflections in the mirror but are masters at memicing or mirroring others so they feel normal on the inside. Predators 👺💀
Evil also grows because these horrible Mothers turn a blind eye in order to keep a man.
Wow! This the most informative documentary, in understanding this problem. Very shocking.. How something so 'bad' as perceived, by both parties, to be 'good'.
Excellent work. Thank You for your work.
Lucy, I just watched your documentary & then re-watched it. I want to thank you for opening up about something so private & sharing your experience with us. You are one courageous woman & I applaud you for your bravery. 🥰❤💐
Gross! How about *NOT* giving a kissy face emoji!? *Damn*
Omg, this man still believes he’s done nothing wrong! A three year old doesn’t know any better but he did. He’s still a danger to kids.
This video provides a lot of insight into a very difficult topic. I am thankful that nothing like this ever happened to me. We can't just sweep this kind of thing under the rug and expect it to go away.
Wonderfully compelling, frightening and informative. The roller coaster of emotion trancends the screen as the tale unfolds and lays bare the raw emotion of deceit, selfish gratification and the complete disconnect Dragan perpetrates on two young girls of the story. Initially I was enraged that the subject of Dragan's abuse would dare give voice (and comfort) to her perpetrator, I'm left speechless at the end with the courage shown by Lucy. This feels as much a catharsis and healing endeavor as it does in seeking justice to right a decades-long evil committed on innocence and trust.
Matt Means you are absolutely correct- it’s important to really listen. Only by listening can we learn beyond our fears.
What a wonderful, grounded person. I totally agree with what she says about "a moment of pause", because we are so busy punishing the pervert that we think we are doing the child a great service by ripping that person away from him/her. This is the first time that the child very often knows that there was something wrong in this relationship and when everyone is raising their souls in shock, weeping and wailing, the child thinks THEY have been bad and somehow it is equally their fault.
Of course the pervert has to be separated immediately, but there should be a time of supervised account that the pervert should face the child and exonerate them from any guilt and with guidance let the child see that he/she was or is an innocent child who has been led wrongly by the adult. A child does not know what is "wrong and illegal" in an adult world . It is up to the adults around children to lovingly lead them along the true innocent path of childhood.
I hope this lady can continue along the path she is on now, knowing that what happened was wrong, but that she had no choice or say in the matter and yet has found peace. I would wish it for her sister, but she has a long hard road in front of her, poor dear.
well-said isbsey!
I'm glad to have run across your film today, so much of what you described is true for me as well...a master at disassociation, to the point that I can also face my abuser and hold my complete composure. It is very interesting to find that my reaction is not really so rare, and in fact, I am normal.
You are the reason I made this film. If it could help only one other person, it was worth it. Love to you.
You cannot spot the nor can you prevent this. What Dragan said is 100%. The mother or caregiver MUST PAY ATTENTION to their children.
yes... AND... at same time, sounds like he is... typically... victim blaming... n enabler blaming... instead of owning his responsibility... and at same time... well, still... fing yeah... smh ugh. GRRR. of course we have to hyper-vigilantly watch out for all children... all the time... given this sick insane f'd up hell world... (sigh) ****
"You seemed to enjoy it."
Why does this man have a forehead without bullet holes??
Yeah haha 👏
Right? Disgusting thing to say to her.
Right!! Why is he still breathing.
@@Dollface829 yeah good question!!!
The child might miss a father figure but they do not miss the sexual abuse. It takes time for a child to mature and really understand that they were just used, like an object, by the abuser
Correct
It's everyone's fault but his.Typical.There is no real love for the victim,only for their own pleasure.Any thing they say to the contrary is justification and denial.
This filth continues in homes around the world, nobody should have the right to touch you without permission! Life in prison for those who touch any children , they are not yours to destroy!
Biggest load of codswallop I have ever seen. Ever!! The abuse of a child is the abuse of a child, no matter what.
@katherine harvey That was bullshit lies. Even in the description box the woman who made the documentary said that this "incident" was a fabrication.
melodykeogh I know sick sick bastards
Lucy there has never been anything as on point as this that I have ever encountered in regards to the abuse I went through. Mine was with my biological father and it was something that I am still trying to heal from. I have forgiven him for myself and tried to have a relationship with him but I didn’t know how to guard myself from his manipulation and so every attempt at rebuilding a relationship with him failed. He finally passed away last year and it was almost like a weight was lifted from me bc the enigma of our relationship was finally put to rest. Thank you so very much for your candor and bravery. And even though I could see and even more feel his manipulation through the documentary I’d like to thank him as well for deciding to expose himself in such a way.
@Maria ✨I hope you’re doing well and sending love and healing. ✨ ❤️🩹
"But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea."
Mathew 18:6.
"No longer sexual now." You're too old for him now.
True that.
This was very powerful. Thankyou for sharing your story Lucy 🖤 Came here from the Surviving Life channel and your humility is aspirational . Like you said, it would gain you nothing to harbour hate, but knowing that and living that are two different things and that you've managed it so successfully is a wonderful thing . I'm truly happy for you , you seem like you'd be a great person to know 😊 Keep sharing your truth!
Also, overjoyed this man is now in prison dealing with the consequences of his abhorrent actions.
Those poor 100+ unknown girls he hurt. Glad there was SOME justice here, albeit late
This is extremely upsetting. This man is a liar. He found a target and went after it. Her mom never said it was ok.
He’s still blaming YOU. Why is he free? Why is he free to do this to another child?
He is not free. Read the description. He is now in jail on a 90 year sentance.
He does blame me. Because he's delusional. That's part of the danger of paedophiles. They struggle to see the harm in what they do. That's why I made this film so that we can all see the craziness. But theres no point in me being emotional and damaged. What would that achieve? The only one who would suffer is me and my children with a damaged mother. I'd rather find sense and strength in myself to come out on top.
Lucy Witts yes...I should have read the description. What you’ve done is incredibly brave. And, I commend you for having such guts to meet with him. You certainly took your power back. I’m sorry this happened to you, really I am. No...you’re not at all weak. And, you deserve a bloody medal. Merry Christmas from my family to yours 🎄x
@@pommiebears and a merry merry christmas to you too
@@lucywitts17708 I'm so happy for you that you and your sister got justice. My mother put me in foster care when I was 7 without explaining what is happening, she did this so she could focus on her business which was quite successful then. I remember being jealous of her business because she called it her "baby" and said she has to spend much time now so that the business can then take care of her. She parentified me, telling me all about how my father was cheating on her with teenagers and even used me as a spy. The first night in foster care I had a bad dream that the my "foster father" was coming towards me, smiling and standing on the side of a hearse. I now this this was perhaps a premonition. Now my father has said it was my responsibility to not get sexually abused, at age 7!? Without him or my mother ever explaining how to protect myself. When the man started abusing me, I just froze! I resent that my mother and father never said sorry. I ended up a heroin addict because I can't deal with the pain and confusion I feel every day. I tried to kill myself when I was 12 and it was almost a completed suicide, a friend took me in a car to hospital where the doctors said I had taken over the lethal dose of amitriptyline but somehow I survived. When I woke up, my father didn't even ask why I had done this, he was just guilt tripping me immediately. I don't have anybody I talk to about this, the last time I told someone I was made to feel very bad. Thank you so much for making this documentary, you are such an incredible woman! I hate being called strong because people always said that to me as a child, when I was broken inside. But you are radiating an inner strength that I admire. Thank you so much. Much love and respect
These are profoundly sick dangerous and morally bereft people. Highly disturbing.
P.S : a mother always knows
Thank you for making this film.Pleople need to see these kind of things.If you haven't walked that path you wouldn't understand what that child goes through. I walked that same path with my own father and as an adult I understand the impact that has had on not only my life,but the life of every child who lives through sexual abuse.
That is then this is now. Society doesn't blame the child. Only the people close to the child does that. And no amount of pause moment is going to change that. Pause moment only allows the grown ups around the child to decide to handle the matter in house. This allows the criminal to get away with it and move on to other victims. Children today have more protection and access "that's when the parent or relative report it." Having a well informed child is the greatest thing for a mom to do for her babies. "Tell if they touch!" TELL TELL TELL! if mom doesn't listen tell the school nurse. go to the police. You gotta wonder why as a child it was ok for her to allow a grown man whom is her mothers lover and father figure to screw her. Why did she think it was normal. HELLO MOM'S This woman made me ill listening to her saying well I thought this was normal. Wait you didn't know having a grown man on top of you who sleeps the same way with your mom was not right?
This documentary should have millions of views, it is quite incredible for many reasons, first of all the strength Lucy has to confront him like this to obtain evidence. It;s just amazing, it brings people right into the sick intimacy that exists between the abuser and the abusee (that should be a word), I think this shows very accurately what it feels like to be targeted by one of these people. Just imagine dealing with this person when you are just a child?!??! It's just incredible how you made it through and got justice for you and your sister. So many abusees never get that, they have to see the abuser carry on happily with their lives facing no consequences.
I see many comments saying this documentary is normalizing his behaviour - I think these things need to be spoken about. The more time we take to understand the motivations the easier it becomes for us to recognise when it is happening and help prevent it from happening to others.
Agreed. I made a similar comment about it "normalizing" but I think it's not about her talking to him or so on, but more to the fact of not calling him out on his excuses and blame, along with the hugs, background music and laughter that makes it seem so disturbing & "accepting."
Although I have never had this conversation with my step father... whom abused me...I see him and myself in this interview. I don't think we can ever fully heal from these things. We can reach a place of forgiveness and disconnect from it but it changes our perceptions of others.
dragan must be arrested n locked in max security prison for rest of his fing pathetic sick 'life...' if there r any ways of him n/or any others similar to him, authentically repenting, owning their responsibility n accepting overdue commensurate consequences commanded them towards rightfully atoning his/their crimes... if there r any ways such a lost vile evil criminal heinous creep low life demon to reach for consciousness health healing recovery wellness accountability doing all the real fing integral work on themselves, in order towards them making authentic transcendental amends... etc etc... (honestly, it would def be way beyond fing miraculous n i'd have a VERY impossible time trusting they r not just continuing their sadistic hubris filled dangerous threatening deceitful fraudulence... if any of the psycho-socio-path pedo criminal predatory abuser narcissistic nutcases ever authentically gave any shits ever n actually thoroughly self analyzed n examined their criminality n the disastrous n catastrophic harmful damaging impacts they perpetrate against others whom they commit crimes against... n did any essential work on themselves to at all ever better themselves; essentially changing transforming towards worthwhile valuable essential necessary healing conscious responsible honorable respectful humane rightful recovery, sanity, decency, wellness, lawfulness, trustworthiness, goodness... etc etc... i mean... they would have to remain removed from society cuz they must be commanded due commensurate consequences n be made to pay towards amending their severe unpardonable crimes way too many dangerous sick insane vile pedo criminals r on the loose, r wrongfully protected n insidiously infiltrated into seemingly omnipotence; especially they seem to be infecting positions of 'power,' 'authority' n in 'agencies' that r supposedly occupying positions that r claiming to 'serve n protect children,' n 'serve n protect justice,' n claiming to 'target severe criminals such as heinous pedophiles, n command due commensurate consequences at n against criminals towards amending their severe crimes...' pedo criminals have infiltrated 'governmental bodies,' they have infiltrated 'media,' they have infiltrated 'religion,' 'education,' they have infiltrated... on n on; so on n so forth... etc etc... NOT AT ALL OK. children r being targeted exploited enslaved used abused traumatized terrorized tortured commodified monetized harvested endangered threatened groomed manipulated deceived sexualized perpetrated against stalked kidnapped taken stolen murdered sacrificed cannibalized discarded etc etc... by fing heinous pedo criminals... it is right up there on top; as one of thee worst if not thee worst most catastrophic beyond challenging horrific unmanageable overwhelming sick insane MEGA SCALE world PERVasive epidemic MAJOR URGENT EMERGENCY problems (still...) in this world, currently....!??! #StopAbuseCrimesNOW!!!! ****
That isn't the case for all abuse victims, the ones who have been physically permanently damaged and tortured cannot sit in a room and negotiate a separation with the abuser.
Of course! There is no one stop fix all solution. If there was, there would be no need for finding options. Everyone has their own experience and some groups within that very large umbrella do not experience violence and sadism. I was kinda hoping that it was clear that I referred to the non-violence sector. I clearly failed in making that clear.
Thank you so much for this outstanding, incredibly hard opus@@lucywitts17708. It's so unfortunate that people are still so much in denial about the scale of paedophilia, they don't realise it's at the end of their street at the most. The societal refusal to see the bigger picture, to recognize, treat and prevent paedophiles from offending is not through punitive actions. That's simply too late. Thank you for this fantastic work, I wish your documentary had more exposure, your voice is so important.
I don't believe the mother said that. I think that is a scapegoat for his character.
NvZ I don’t believe it either.
I missed that, what did she say?
I do believe the mother said that, however she didn’t have bad intentions. They were non-conformist type of family and I think the mother meant for her children to embrace that naked bodies are natural etc-.
I'm thankful that I was not sexually abused as a child but did have a very mentally abusive alcoholic father and just like the physical abuse it has it's devastating effects on you for life. People tend to think you dwell on the past but the truth is in my case I don't. It is the simple fact that the moulding of the past builds the platform of today. The crucial thing I learned in life though is you have to ultimately forgive (even though you don't want anything to do with them) those who have wronged you. If you hold hatred in you for long enough you will become the very thing you hated to begin with. I became my mentally abusive father but luckily I learned this before I messed somebody's life up forever and/or in my fathers case the substance you use (I got on drugs) kills you.
So difficult to watch. Especially the parts where these crimes were hidden in loving affection.
Thank you for your story and how you chose to tell it. You have an incredibly amazing strength by which I'm deeply humbled.
Julie Joyner I agree I know it would of been beyond hard
i agree. she must be a very strong person. i get her mindset and admire that.
but hugging him? (at the end) no no no..., thats a bridge too far for me.
it would have made me sick to the core....
Mother’s please please please stop trusting men with your children!!!!!!!!!, my GOD when will some women learn?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? AND I DO NOT BELIEVE THAT THAT MOTHER DID NOT KNOW WHAT WAS GOING ON!!!!!!
No she flat out says she wasn't looking, and refused to think anything bad. He was "Dad". Different times, sheltered times. Peoples didn't have the access to information that's available today. So sad..
At the very least she knew something was not right.
why only men? women can do it too
Mothers like these generally DON'T CARE about their children one way or another.
@@dangagne8870People DIDN'T WANT TO KNOW.
Libraries and research into pedophilia goes back to literal Ancient humanity.
No matter the time there is NO EXCUSE to NOT LISTEN AND BELIEVE YOUR CHILD and to not do your research.
What's normal about walking Round naked in front of a stepfather well done to the interviewer who didn't believe what she is saying about the abuse she is still protecting him and her mother today what a shame
I agree with you 100%
@Mihaela Strugaru that's exactly what it is
You've never been in that situation..so don't judge...be supportive..
@@emmahorn9325 actually go and read my other comments before you tell me I don't know what I am talking about
Sounds like he was still trying to shift most of the blame on her until the end of the document. She seems to be an amazing and brave person. Very forgiving. Very humbling to watch. I wish that more victims could get this kind of acknowledgment of their abuse by the abuser. God Bless!
This program was really well done. No spoilers!
I’m full of admiration for Lucy. To be an advocate for victims yet not demonise the perpetrators is a difficult position to be in. But she is right. The vulnerable child has been groomed to think the adult is the most important thing in their life, then their world is ripped apart, that person is taken away & they are left with nothing but shame.
Lucy, May others find the peace you have and go on to help others as you are doing. Thank you.
He is a pig , nothing less. How dare him blame the child .
Exactly. He should blame his religion.
Pigs dont do this. Hes a monster.
IT'S JUST TOO BAD SHE COULDN'T HAVE CAPTURED HIM AT HER DESERT INTERVIEW,BURIED HIM UP TO HIS HEAD WHERE HE COULDN'T GET AWAY,LIKE THE APACHES WOULD DO.....AND LEAVE HIM THERE ALONE TO HIS MUCH DESERVED FATE...(P.S.HE'S APTLY NAMED......TELL ME WHERE HE LIVES......THERE'S STILL TIME !!!)
Omg, how is he free to walk among normal people, disgusting!
I am astonished at her composure and strength, not only in the video, but the replies to some of these comments. Truly amazing woman, shows us all there is hope.
The fact that this woman wants to normalize what has happened to her is honestly hilarious. Normalizing it is how he groomed you in the first place
But this is exactly how grooming goes for most children. This video isn't condoning the "normality" of what transpired , one has to take into account that in that time and place there were very liberal hippie views back then, free love, freedom of expression and this is that dynamic. There weren't many safeguards in place in those times. My own mother was a hippie and I was raised around them. And I was very lucky indeed that I was never interfered with but from this lense I surly could have been. Remove violence, remove fear and yes I am indeed lucky. Unfortunately, I was victimized later at 14 years old.
As sickening as this story was, I am thankful for it. So many parents are only focused on "stranger danger", when odds are their family knows the predator who will victimize their child. We need to teach parents and caregivers better, to hopefully identify someone trying to take advantage of a vulnerable child BEFORE it happens. I have zero sympathy for pedophiles, even the ones who abused themselves. When someone's sexual Attraction and desire becomes fixated on domineering and abusing the most vulnerable in our society, they are no better than rabid dogs, and need to be EXECUTED as such!
Classic rock Lover if I had attraction to children...I’d put a gun in my mouth and pull the trigger. These paedophiles know how morally and fundamentally disgusting this is, yet they leave victim after victim in their wake. I’d rather be dead. You’re right,Netherland predators are usually trusted people. God....it makes me so angry.
It's my pleasure.
Dysfunctional family starts from the parents.
Thank you for sharing this. It helped me a lot.
The problem is really: It didn't feel wrong. When it happends theres some kind of 'natural behavior' in it.
I felt joy and happiness to be the one in charge. I was feeling like a princess and was treated as this. And no; it wasnt all about the Sex. It felt like a nearly normal, good relationship of two adults.
!!! But with the fucking fact I wasnt adult. I was a child !!!
For me I was aware of all of this and I was encuraging him (no joke, I ask him to have sex). I came into puberty and wanted to have the closest person to explore sexuality with. It felt and still feels natural to me.
Funny thing was: Sex was awesome. I felt very good, and wanted this too.
BUT
with 31 i realized, when people told me that wasnt normal and i started to listen, that he groomed and gaslighted me all the time. Absolute successfully. And now i look back and ask myself the question: What did he do just for Sex? What did he do out of pure giving love? And wheres the seperation?
The desperating point is: both work absolutely together.
I will never know.
When the abuser in the video sais: 'I groomed you to be my wife at age of 18' I was shocked.
My stepdad promised to merry me at age of 18. But never did. But lost interest.
I absolutely feel torn. I guess thats what many persons with abusive past do feel like.
I often ask myself, if I am the cause - or the beginning of his pedophile tendencies, or if i was just the next in line.
I often ask myself: Am I guilty when he goes on?
I will never know if he really loved me, and sex was just a form of addition or if he really aimed for it. The thing i know is: I loved him. I loved him listening for me, I loved him hugging me, I loved him supporting me in any way ever possible. I needed encouragement so desperately. I needed someone beliving in me, caring for me.
He abused my needs.
I did go to police with age of 31.
He was/is a school teacher working with children. I didnt wanted to end them like me, doubting if they deserved love without payment of sex.
My Mum knew it all the time, but said to police id lie (she was to hurt I never wanted to be with her in my youth but him) . Older friends accused me to create storries, because they didnt want to have to do something with it.
Last thing I know is, that he was together with a woman with a female child. I did warn them. Also he betrayed that women with and other one, having a female child... I wanted to stop this but failed in the end.
However im not sorry.
I did the right thing for my feelings and tried to help furure victims.
My 'family' fell appart. I never spoke with any of them again. No one.
Especially not with my mum.
I hope at least, I could help some of the people who also go to police.
And i wish all victims to be strong and regenerate.
Your not to be sexualized. Youre to be loved.
Laghagua of course you didn’t know it was wrong, you were a very young child. Don’t ever carry any shame. The shame is on your abuser, not you.
I made this film for people like you. You are only welcome.
Did she LAUGH just now when he said, "I love you, though it's no longer sexual"? 🤯 Yeah, that's a riot. It's no longer sexual bcuz she's WAY TOO OLD FOR HIM NOW. Wow, that was funny to her? 🤮 If he said that to me, Id punch him in the mouth.
It may be a trauma response. I was sexually abused for years as a child and I’ve noticed that in situations where I feel uncomfortable I give a fake laugh or a giggle. It may be the same for her.
Yeah, NOW he loves her like a child. Not when she was a child.
Read the description. She did all this to get him to admit to his crimes and pattern of abuse so he could be convicted and thrown in prison, which he was, in part because of this interview. What she did was incredibly brave to sit through that without reacting in order to get him to talk further about the abuse to get further evidence. Crazy how many people are judging her and her mom in the comments when all the context is in the description.
Great film. This man is definitely an expert groomer. Terrifiying and cunning. Mothers, pay f'ing attention to the people you bring into your lives.
I was sexually abused by my stepfather from age 8-15 my mother didn’t believe me I went crazy for a while I’m 47 now and suffer from ptsd among other things
My boyfriend doesn’t understand why I can’t let it go and nether do I
I can totally relate to this x
Perhaps he should educate himself on the subject matter, and the life long effects of trauma... This type of wound never fully heals.
God bless you❤
I'm 64 and I'd love to "Let it go".Truth is ,it won't let me go.It altered my life and it's so much a part of it.I always felt my reality was so different to everyone else.If your boyfriend has difficulty understanding,he needs to watch the True Vision video "Chosen" about 3 boys at Caldicott school. .It won a BAFTA documentary award in 2009.The boys are men now ,and recount their experiences and explain why it took so long for the truth to surface.
Respect to you and keep talking!
He stole your ability to truly trust some one - but you seem to have come a long Way, living in a pleasing relationship,,,I Wish you the Best.
My mother would always tell me I have a black heart .. well when ur father touches u and u inform your mother and she does nothing .. what's to be expected .. no child should grow up wanting to poison their father .. he finally past last year (of natural causes) and my mom past 5 yrs ago and sadly I dont feel pain or a loss cuz how can u miss something you never had (love & protection from either one of your parents)
Ronica, I responded to your comment but in the wrong spot. I don't know how to edit that, esp at 3.30am lol.. Please see below the Lano Del Ray comment. I'll fix it tomorrow.. Just wanted to send you well wishes x @RONICA
I’m so sorry. 🙏💔
Her mother and him should be locked up for life. Let them loose in prison because they hate pedophiles in prison. Her mother is sick. Why isn't she angry?
I am watching this now, and want to thank you for putting this forward. It is a really interesting to think about how the child's perspective. I am so glad that this is being discussed more openly. Thank you for your voice and your courage to look at it and speak.
The mom “he had a great relationship with you...” she is the one who was the most groomed as to this day she defends what he did
Their sickness can never be understood. This documentary is repulsive
If you mean that the subject of this documentary is repulsive, you are right. But this documentary is excellent... in its courage, in its intent to help others in similar abuses and in its production. Well done Victoria Witts👍🏻
@vids - that’s your interpretation of it, all I see is yet another documentary attempting to normalise noncing - giving a platform for victim blaming. This documentary is as already stated REPULSIVE.
Indeed.
@@vidsiwantoc2459 no, when you watch it at its entirety you can tell it's manipulating to make real victim feel bad for the perpetrator.
he blames her and his wife that they startet his pedophile behavior? Seriously?? 🤮🤮🤮🤮 don't have to see more.
There is no excuse for his behavior but she may have very well known and conspired in some way whether consciously or subconsciously. It isn't uncommon.
That's the pedophile mindset. They want to believe that the children are "asking for it". It's sick and twisted but that's the rationale they are carrying around.
Surreal. Incredible film editing, and narrative as well. This lady has me mesmerised.
Here we have 100% honesty coming out!
Credit where due!
It seems the general public are so ignorant, thick and screwed up in their outlook.
Agree with Lucy (and the psychologist) that it’s a worldwide issue and instead of the general public being single-minded it’s an issue that needs sorting out properly, it’s the only way to get to the bottom of it otherwise too many people being abused will go unnoticed!
Absolutely! I do have major respect for his honesty. Trying to encourage the reframing of the conversation is important.
@@lucywitts17708
100% true
You can’t change what’s happened, only learn from it. I respect his honesty and your honesty!
I didn’t think the interviewer was much good even though he was a nice chap.
I feel that this is a beautifully done video/story of a topic that is WAY to common. Lucy I hope this has helped you and those affected start/continue to heal.
We are healing. Thank you
I have a nephew who touched my finger after I cut it. I came unglued yelling at him he should never ever touch someone's blood. It was the 80s and the fear I felt was about aids. This guy could have acted in the same manner plain and simple. Kids are naturally curious, but we are the adults and need to teach when they do something wrong. He let it happen, what a failure at being a role model. A failure at being a person. No excuses.
In the beginning of the video, he explains he told the child not to touch his penis...The child's mom said it was okay! Go back and view again, but, either way, they should both have been responsible adults and differentiated between a child's curiosity, and an adult taking advantage of that...Both are condemned...
Karen Contestabile it’s worth having a read of her blog in the description as it explains what actually happened in that moment. Her Mum told him don’t make a big deal of it so as not to cause more curiosity and don’t make sudden moves as she was half asleep and her mum quickly took her back to bed , waited until she fell asleep. He choose to turn this into a fantasy that the mother encouraged him. He blames the mother for getting him started. Just FYI she also explains before this moment she has not had any contact or spoken to him since it was all discovered when she was younger. He choose that version of the story , after all the things he has done to her and has since raped over 100 children, to be the first thing he told her. Sick. She did this film to help put him away and in the end he got 90 years.
What a woman. No one ever wants to hear from the perpetrator. We should because we need to know why. People jist get angry and call them 'sickos' or 'evil' without understanding why they do what they do. You can't stop something you don't understand and this behavior needs to be stopped, so therefore it must be understood. You have done more in this documentary than what the news and media have done in 100 years. I wish you the best and hope you have a good life Lucy! Tom x
People have been interviewing sex offenders for a while. We already have a pretty good idea how many operate. A lot of them fucking suck and try justifying their belief by saying the relationship was consensual. The guy in the video seems like a piece of shit and should get a roundhouse kick to the ribs.
I applaud the sharing, and the honesty, an honesty that likely includes some self deception that is necessary to preserve a sense of self. It seems that everyone is doing the best they can. It's the mother I wonder about - I think her fear of what would she do if her suspicions became a reality, kept her silent, and probably in past & current denial. Namaste 🙏
Lucy you've shown great courage throughout the process of making this public documentary, you know a lot of these realities are hard for people who've not experienced abuse and grooming to understand, or even want to understand. I'm a survivor who suffered the use of violence within the coercion and grooming, if you see, and even today as an adult who understands all that, it's still difficult to not want to go "home" when I face a serious problem or upset... Like that person will make it all better, now to most people and honestly to myself that seems absurd, and it makes you feel even more guilt, its very strange thing to try to explain, that even when there's awful violence you can still have this pulling back feeling, when you face difficulties in life.... It's a hugely brave thing to talk about this, I'm finding it difficult writing this anonymously let alone publically, I guess it brings up that false guilt, and the why am I wanting that person's help after all they've done, thoughts etc.. And it's hard when at the time you may defend that person, I did even with the violent nature of it all I did, for various reasons, society finds that very unsettling and it is, it's all unsettling and even decades after it unsettles me to acknowledge this just in written word, But its vital that adults and society come to understand this issue in its full context, if we want to protect children. I don't agree with idea of the breaking of contact slowly in controlled way, as such, that scares me, but I do understand all the reasons you give for that suggestion, I just don't know how that would work, or how that would've or would impact survivors its so hard. I just wanted to say thank you for being brave enough to bring the difficult emotional parts of this to public view, as its so important, so from me to you, Thank You
and THANK YOU!
@@cBearTV- Help yourself. It's free. You can share with whomever you want.
Wow what a powerful documentary much respect for being able to tell this story with such grace and intelligence this should never happen to anyone Shame on any adult who can engage in or who overlooks such horrendous sexual abuse it’s bloody outrageous
I have three kids to a man who had been abused when he was a child and it was destroying him inside I didn't know what was wrong for most of the 16 years we were with each other but I knew there was something wrong and he didn't get the help he needed because of shame which is why I think this is such a powerful film that will help alot of people who struggle to understand why and blame themselves for what had happened so I think it's so educational to see how all parties involved in this especially because it was affecting the whole family so thankful for talking so openly about this and it's so inspiring for people who are trying to deal with this and how to get the help they need instead of keeping it a secret that eats away at you