Why Most Nice Guys Get Friendzoned

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  • Опубліковано 26 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 613

  • @sadiapsychology
    @sadiapsychology  Місяць тому +27

    This Makes Nice Guys Sexy PART II HERE ua-cam.com/video/3tgpg9QCu4U/v-deo.html

    • @denisbuwembo7695
      @denisbuwembo7695 Місяць тому +1

      sadia work on your stage movement. you hav a pattern that becones predictable after a minute of watching u.. i love ur content ive even told my gal friend 2 watch u.

    • @LoganMartin-p6p
      @LoganMartin-p6p Місяць тому

      How do you know its predictable when you cannot speak english?

    • @lovepeace8918
      @lovepeace8918 Місяць тому

      I'm sorry to have to refuse your proposal Sadia, I'm not looking to get married to anyone at this time. Good luck ! :)

    • @rh262605
      @rh262605 Місяць тому

      Would I be wrong to tell my lady, Bytch you crazy, if she actN crazy? 😂

    • @lovepeace8918
      @lovepeace8918 Місяць тому

      @@rh262605 No, say how you feel truthfully, then ask her why you acting like that, what happened, your mom or dad knock sense out of you or what ? Be understanding, and your ears open, and you will learn what caused her to be that way, could be damn female hormones tho idk.

  • @cnote3580
    @cnote3580 Місяць тому +516

    Happy wife, happy life is one of the most demonic quotes invented.

    • @spartanghost9713
      @spartanghost9713 Місяць тому +10

      💯💯

    • @danroo3294
      @danroo3294 Місяць тому +46

      Made by boomers. Nothing came good out of boomers.

    • @ACTHdan
      @ACTHdan Місяць тому +15

      We all parroted it at one point.
      But slogans are not exactly a body of knowledge either.

    • @Ace.0.0.0.
      @Ace.0.0.0. Місяць тому +5

      Not if you're the wife.😂

    • @Jay-xb6nc
      @Jay-xb6nc Місяць тому +3

      @@danroo3294 Including your parents. Now grow up.

  • @LaFlame-5
    @LaFlame-5 Місяць тому +442

    Men should know that success isn't built on success. It's built on failure and frustration, and on fear that you have to overcome. That's what the e-book called Unveiling Your Hidden Potential' by Bruce Thornwood taught me. The best read I ever had.

    • @JJ-vp3bd
      @JJ-vp3bd Місяць тому +6

      Why don't women read that book

    • @BartokNeeskens
      @BartokNeeskens Місяць тому

      @@LaFlame-5 Digressive post

    • @kellygreenii
      @kellygreenii Місяць тому +12

      It even more basic than that. Successful people fail upward. Those who struggle fail downward.
      That is successful people see failure as a lesson in what doesn’t work. So they change what they are doing.
      Whole those who struggle see failure as a judgement of their worth and their competence…and eventually quit.

    • @modanayeye
      @modanayeye Місяць тому +2

      ​@kellygreenii bro this is deep 😳

    • @lots33ml
      @lots33ml Місяць тому +1

      No truer words have ever been said.

  • @jasonrocksvegas
    @jasonrocksvegas Місяць тому +226

    Being nice and a doormat isn't the same. Be nice and don't tolerate bullshit. Nobody should tolerate bad behavior from anyone. NO is the most powerful word a man can tell a woman.

    • @leoswoyer8348
      @leoswoyer8348 Місяць тому +7

      Some men are empathetic, kind, love sex, and making their wives fully satisfied. If one loves a person, enjoying their happiness is natural and good. Being individuals while being profoundly connected is something that requires balance, which must be driven like a car down a winding road. Submissiveness as a singular trait is not being balanced.

    • @villaespesa1
      @villaespesa1 Місяць тому +9

      Being kind is, for the most part, the way to be.
      Being a nice guy is the unattractive way a man thinks he can please everyone and be liked by everyone.
      A kind man will have boundaries, and what's the difference between a nice man and a man who is good at being a man.

    • @BartokNeeskens
      @BartokNeeskens Місяць тому +5

      ​@@villaespesa1 Women will never accept and date a good guy in this generation

    • @anthonytillery7842
      @anthonytillery7842 Місяць тому

      Right!

    • @villaespesa1
      @villaespesa1 Місяць тому +6

      @BartokNeeskens Yeah.
      Lots of women are actually repelled by a good man and will choose a man who brings chaos.

  • @oliverman6168
    @oliverman6168 Місяць тому +333

    Don't ever be disappointed about disappointing women.

    • @sammyb1651
      @sammyb1651 Місяць тому +34

      Women position themselves at the centre of a relationship and make the relationship about them. That's a near universal rule.
      Men are downstream of women. Men are principally "nice" in order to accomodate women's needs.
      It's cause and effect. It happens BECAUSE OF women. Ie the problem is with women.
      However the solution has to be with the male because women aren't accountable. You have to put yourself first and they can either get on board with that or sling it. No loss if it's the latter.

    • @spartanghost9713
      @spartanghost9713 Місяць тому +1

      ​@@sammyb1651 💯💯

    • @toshiojohnston3732
      @toshiojohnston3732 Місяць тому +3

      Nice guys finish 1st if their someone else nice guy.

    • @JohnM...
      @JohnM... Місяць тому +3

      What if I’m sexually inexperienced and have the assumption that she’ll either laugh at me or her curiosity/attraction will just disappear?

    • @spartanghost9713
      @spartanghost9713 Місяць тому +3

      @@JohnM... Tell her and see what happens, if she loves you, she is gonna accept it, but if she doesnt love you, she was just there for the sex.

  • @BeingJones1
    @BeingJones1 Місяць тому +531

    3 things that helped me and literally changed my life
    1. I stopped watching porn
    2. I read books on Revandles (for women)
    3. Stop drinking

    • @stevem2323
      @stevem2323 Місяць тому +5

      Drinking? Wtf that has to do with anything?

    • @matthewbaumann630
      @matthewbaumann630 Місяць тому +12

      @@stevem2323 Drinking is super unhealthy.

    • @permach363
      @permach363 Місяць тому

      So casually

    • @orbetobe
      @orbetobe Місяць тому +2

      I agree with 1. and 3... 2. sounds like rubbish

    • @BeingJones1
      @BeingJones1 Місяць тому

      ​@@orbetobe otherwise I was boring in elementary and high school, I didn't know how to approach girls, I didn't even talk to them, I was looking for something that would help me and I found a lot of things, but by chance I found these books that are banned and believe me it helped, but of course without practice you have nothing, then I had to break the ice outside

  • @donnyyasu2764
    @donnyyasu2764 Місяць тому +42

    This hit the nail on the head. Both me and my best friend were raised by single mothers who did everything to make sure we were good boys, obedient, non confrontational and non-agreesive. None of us could get girls past the talking stage, and when we did, we were used and cheated on. Started doing all the opposite of what our mother's told us and got results.

  • @jo-nathan.thomas
    @jo-nathan.thomas Місяць тому +50

    Most males are brought up and rewarded for being a "good boy" or or "nice boy" at home, school, etc...Apparently the lot has been raised wrong.

  • @outlawz3068
    @outlawz3068 Місяць тому +107

    Common sense. A woman choses a nice guy, mostly nice things will happen. A woman choses a bad guy, mostly bad things will happen. Chose the outcome.

    • @Horyssas
      @Horyssas 15 днів тому +1

      Look, beeing nice is such nonsense. It is often used as excuse by guys who are just weak.
      Goal is to be strong, confident, desicive, strong moral principles, and be a good man.
      Ex special forces operator said (and I like that so much):
      Good man is not the one who are not able to do violence. Good man us the one, who is capable to do massive violence, but use it only for good things. Man who is not able to do violence, is not good, he is just weak and he is a piece of shit.
      The principle is the same for “nice guys” in dating.

    • @snapcrown9954
      @snapcrown9954 13 днів тому

      This is how some guys manipulate low women by saying this….have everything and be nice rather than having nothing and saying Iam nice

  • @phantomvox
    @phantomvox Місяць тому +128

    Extremely painful for me to hear this but Its interesting because I have two brothers and neither of us have successful relationships with women and we are in our 40s. We never had a close relationship with our father due to his abusive behavior. Thats explain why we are so close to our mother making us “nice guys”

    • @Georgeson1401
      @Georgeson1401 Місяць тому +4

      Your past should not become your reality,my mother isn’t the greatest of mother but it’s on her.I still have to push forward exploring the greatest self I can find.At the end of the day you are in control of your life and the story you sell yourself will be the reason you make it or fail.

    • @waitam5014
      @waitam5014 20 днів тому +1

      It’s never too late to change your life and your brothers. Hang in there and do the hard work of dealing and healing from you past and improve overtime and become the healthy man you can be 🙏

  • @noelalam9731
    @noelalam9731 Місяць тому +22

    listening to this made me realize im not a victim to anybody only myself. thank you

  • @michaelflamingsword3131
    @michaelflamingsword3131 Місяць тому +47

    Sadia, I didn't grow up in a broken home, I didn't overly connect to my mother either. Nor did I disconnect from my father. I actually was very independent doing things by myself. Not even tell where I was going. But I am still a nice man because God wants me to be like that. He expects me to have compassion, love, patience, forgiveness, and kindness. If women are abused by rough men, that's their choices then if it don't work. Same for men. Simply learn how to process it, adjust to it, and learn to have more patience instead of instant gratification.

    • @eppsislike
      @eppsislike Місяць тому +6

      there are kind men and nice men. Nice men are inauthentic, kind men are the opposite.

    • @danroo3294
      @danroo3294 Місяць тому +4

      Chances are you’re putting boundaries which a nice guys lacks. They don’t understand they’re being disrespected because they think it’s normal to be treated in that way.

    • @BIG_Gold
      @BIG_Gold Місяць тому

      love this comment @michaelflamingsword3131

    • @michaelflamingsword3131
      @michaelflamingsword3131 16 днів тому +1

      ​@@danroo3294Who says you have to set boundaries. Who is deciding that ? Me ? You ? Sadia ? Who ?

  • @romainauberon9870
    @romainauberon9870 Місяць тому +76

    If you want to build that aura and charisma (and to show it properly around women), you have to check an e-book Mastering The First Impression: The Path To Seven Dates A Month. Since I read it (and two other books from the same author, you can probably get bundle right now), girls started respecting me a lot more. Of course, you will need to put in some hard work while applying everything author mentions in these books, but I guarantee it's going to be worth while.

  • @justinchatov8913
    @justinchatov8913 Місяць тому +38

    To be a man, find your purpose in life, be considerate, and have boundaries.

  • @mr.k6831
    @mr.k6831 Місяць тому +89

    Thanks Sadia, I am one of those "nice guy" who fall in love with the most traumatic married woman I've ever seen. Now I know why I did that😢

    • @sadiapsychology
      @sadiapsychology  Місяць тому +16

      Its All Good, You are Amazing for realizing and working yourself!

    • @mr.k6831
      @mr.k6831 Місяць тому +3

      Thank you ❤ ​@@sadiapsychology

    • @Manohman-fx2jq
      @Manohman-fx2jq Місяць тому +4

      I hope you dodged a bullet there brother.

  • @Newgrist
    @Newgrist Місяць тому +35

    Nice guy. Chronically single. My case is the precise opposite to that you describe. Overidentified with my dad, who was a strong, stable presence. No warmth or affection from my mom, who is anything but. Working on repairing the bond with my mom, but have little to no capacity to relate romantically to women, who usually provoke fear in me.

  • @chrisabelard
    @chrisabelard Місяць тому +48

    This hurt to hear but its reality. I went through these examples in my last relationship. Being too nice and not listening to my gut early, caused me to waste 3 years. Thank you for sharing this!

    • @mostafafawaz7805
      @mostafafawaz7805 28 днів тому +2

      It caused me to lose six years and tons of money

  • @JohnDoe-pt7ru
    @JohnDoe-pt7ru 23 дні тому +17

    Ugly guy=nice guy
    We all know it. Someone wants to introduce someone else and when they're not attractive, people universally say "he/she is really nice".

    • @nickthompson1812
      @nickthompson1812 20 днів тому +3

      Off base in my opinion. I’m not introducing my friend to women by saying “yeah he’s totally hot”
      Also, I’m fairly attractive and have turned down far more women than I’ve bedded. I’m a nice guy because the casual sex doesn’t sit with me. I’m a nice guy because I was raised by a single mother. It has nothing to do with my appearance, and frankly it’s been hard to stick to my morals when women tempt me with freebies.

    • @devilsadvocacy
      @devilsadvocacy 5 днів тому

      @@nickthompson1812Being fairly attractive, as you describe yourself, you have no clue what those of us who aren’t attractive go through

    • @andrewgage6942
      @andrewgage6942 5 днів тому

      I'm 5'4", fast approaching 60, and I'm ugly, if I had a penny from every individual who told me how unattractive I am, I'd be a millionaire, but when I see how many people around me are either living a lonely existence whilst in a relationship and how many people around me are either going through a bitter divorce or are bitter about their divorce, I'm glad I'm ugly, I'm invisible and after being single for near enough all of my life, apart from a few months where I had a few relationships, I don't want to be involved in a relationship, I'm happy being single, I like my own company, I've never been in a relationship long enough to know what it's like to miss being in a relationship, I wouldn't know what to do now

  • @Rod-jn1om
    @Rod-jn1om Місяць тому +47

    Women love nice guys because they get all the rewards and benefits from them without any of the responsibilities in a relationship. I seen this firsthand with my sister. She has guys lined up in her phone that will do anything for her and they get nothing in return but a pretty face. She’s a pro. As her brother, I learned this from her.😂

    • @user-vx2fw7qe1n
      @user-vx2fw7qe1n 19 днів тому +6

      Doesn’t sound like your sister is a good person, feel bad for those guys, I’m glad my sis appreciates her guy, both care about it each other and work to make each other better

    • @Grimmlocked
      @Grimmlocked 15 днів тому +2

      @@user-vx2fw7qe1nnah don’t feel bad for simps. There needs to be social stigma about it.
      That is the only way boys are going to learn

  • @Onnitfan1
    @Onnitfan1 Місяць тому +11

    Man. she nailed it with his one. All dudes should listen to this. I know a lot of guys who think about women like this.

  • @sdb7012
    @sdb7012 Місяць тому +9

    Really trying to rewire myself to stop being too nice or too kind. It’s butchered my dating experience for far too long and I’m sick of it. So thanks for some insight as always!

    • @Ace.0.0.0.
      @Ace.0.0.0. 9 днів тому

      Here's a tip when dealing with women (or anyone else). Be 1) polite, honest, & direct. Even when it's tough. 2) Mean what you say. Even when it's tough. In other words, have reasonable boundaries, and the spine to enforce them.
      Know that you will be tested. But stick to your guns, and in time people will realize that you mean what you say.
      And when things go south, as they sometimes do, then admit you made a mistake, and then try to fix it. People respect someone who chooses to be accountable.

  • @danielgz8497
    @danielgz8497 13 днів тому +3

    Absolute gold, this was exactly me and it explains why my ex cheating on me felt like a like a dagger to the heart.

  • @carrocesta
    @carrocesta Місяць тому +21

    so real. I see this type of men all the time. It is terrible. The worst part is that they don't see this and so they don't want to change.

    • @ghostbearr1
      @ghostbearr1 Місяць тому +7

      I know I am nice guy. The problem is there no real way to help nice guys, because there is no real interest in helping men. Most of the time, I am just a door mat to my friends and family.

    • @danroo3294
      @danroo3294 Місяць тому +4

      @@ghostbearr1just have boundaries my guy and find disrespect when it’s masked behind a joke. Don’t be afraid of confrontation, you’ll lose people regardless.

    • @ghostbearr1
      @ghostbearr1 Місяць тому

      @@danroo3294 This is part of the problem, I know the advice you are giving is from a good place. This is advise I have heard multiple times, it does not help. I am not afraid of confrontation and I lose people all of the time.
      People think there is simple solutions for a complex and diverse set of problems. Though you can think what you will on this.

  • @riaanbreedt5490
    @riaanbreedt5490 Місяць тому +14

    if a man is being a nice guy results that he is not good enough then she didn't see his worth and most probably are not used to or being accustomed to nice guys in general and they are still affected by the toxic life mindset of life and dating style. i say if i am not good enough as a nice guy and i am boring to you then by all means leave but don't come back

  • @easter_sunday
    @easter_sunday Місяць тому +16

    Friendzone = Blessing in Disguise.

    • @XolaniWorms
      @XolaniWorms Місяць тому

      How is it a blessing in disguise 😢

    • @nickthompson1812
      @nickthompson1812 20 днів тому +3

      @@XolaniWorms because it teaches you which women will use you for their gain. Friendzoning doesn’t benefit the men…

  • @savvyguy1353
    @savvyguy1353 Місяць тому +35

    Pants suit is hanging on for dear life. Solid content that said.

    • @1989tonyg
      @1989tonyg Місяць тому +2

      And it looks soooo good

  • @ThePiedra777
    @ThePiedra777 Місяць тому +104

    I was a nice guy in my early 20’s, got played and became a jerk and got into relationships not caring and it worked to get hot chicks. The more chicks I slept with the more confident and higher caliber girl I got. I’ve learned the way to keep a girl interested is to love them, without being in love with them. I figured this out and it has now resulted in a 10 year relationship. I hate the fact it has to be this way but it does.

    • @sehzadelee
      @sehzadelee Місяць тому +6

      what does love them, without being in love with them means ? not showing them you actually love them ?

    • @ThePiedra777
      @ThePiedra777 Місяць тому +29

      @@sehzadelee , it means do what you would do if you were in love with the person without falling, in love. When you show too much affection, when you’re sprung it turns women off. You have to keep that edge and the best way to keep the “I don’t give a f$&@,” edge to you is to not care if she stays or leaves. I know it’s kind of hard to make it make sense but trust me, as someone who’s been with tons of girls it works.

    • @forward_ever_ever2595
      @forward_ever_ever2595 Місяць тому +1

      ​@@ThePiedra777i concur

    • @supercal333
      @supercal333 Місяць тому +11

      ​@@ThePiedra777I suspect being good-looking is a prerequisite for this approach.

    • @ThePiedra777
      @ThePiedra777 Місяць тому +15

      @@supercal333 , I’m not that good looking, I’m just confident. Work on yourself first, then work on not getting sprung on a girl right away, that’s key. You have to let her fall for you first for it to work out long term.

  • @osaosifo2581
    @osaosifo2581 Місяць тому +11

    I am grateful for what you are doing for humanity! Thank you Sadia!

  • @romaeusjablyk90
    @romaeusjablyk90 Місяць тому +6

    I saw the short and I was waiting for the full video, it all makes sense for me now, I haven't been in a relationship for years out of fear from how compliant I was.

  • @bradensmith2182
    @bradensmith2182 Місяць тому +21

    Congratulations! You have inoculated me from pursuing any relationship. Too much to risk. Still like watching your videos though, but from a distance.

    • @kerryfoster1
      @kerryfoster1 Місяць тому +4

      She just told you what to do! Get out there and go for sex!

    • @spartanghost9713
      @spartanghost9713 Місяць тому

      I didnt want relationships but after watching the video, i know why i did the right choice.

  • @dwmaddawgs
    @dwmaddawgs Місяць тому +8

    I like being nice to someone with whom I'd like to have a relationship with. If she doesn't appreciate it she can F-Off!💁🏾‍♂️
    If she doesn't want to be honest she can F-off too!
    I'm the nice guy that's not taking no ish! I don't care if you're a woman, it's on respect from day one!

  • @svantenordstrom
    @svantenordstrom Місяць тому +8

    This gave me an explanation. Finally.
    I grew up with two fantastic parents and four older sisters. My father came out of a really traumatic divorce before he met my mother which I recon render him emotionally unavailable. He was awesome in every way, supporting and kind. But never really opened up or spoke to me about anything other than practical matters.
    He also kept really busy and drank a lot (although I rarely saw him drunk), probably to keep his mind off of things. He also wasn’t especially “manly” in his temperament although he was very manly in his professional skills and abilities.
    So I always turned to my mother for emotional support and my mother was fantastic.
    The NEVER had a fight, al least to my knowledge. They argued about disagreements but never shouted or fought. Either one of them were especially dominant.
    I believe this upbringing made me see women as sweet and perfect and men rather strange unobtainable and the ideal man to always be kind, strong and silent. No matter what.
    I took me a bit into my 40’s and a lot of work on my self to be comfortable around men in groups. Especially “manly” men.
    In relationships I’ve always seen my partner as “perfect” and always to be right in every argument…up to the point we’re my passive aggression became an obvious problem…
    I never even really understood why to it’s necessary to disagree in a relationship.
    It’s so much easier to just get along…
    This has made me a pretty obnoxious parter at times and I’m about to exit yet another long relationship with this as a main ingredient.

  • @BlackCroLong
    @BlackCroLong Місяць тому +19

    Cause there's alimony.
    Imagine a world where the state wouldnt compensate bad decisions.
    No abortion, no child support, no alimony.
    Nice Guys would get what they deserve. And people going purely after pleasure and exitement too.

  • @kimslife_de
    @kimslife_de Місяць тому +12

    Video Summary: Understanding the “Nice Guy” and “Codependent Woman” Archetypes in Relationships
    1. The Nice Guy and Unbalanced Attachments
    • Premature Attachment: Nice guys tend to attach themselves to partners before any actions justify such attachment. They have difficulty setting balanced boundaries, cutting off everyone except their partner, often resulting in overattachment.
    • Conflict Avoidance: They avoid confrontation, leading to relationship issues because they suppress their own needs to maintain peace.
    • Childhood Roots: Nice guys often come from broken homes, especially with distant or neglectful fathers, which leads them to overidentify with their mothers. This creates a need for female approval, making them submissive to women.
    2. Problems in Relationships for the Nice Guy
    • Submission and Non-Confrontation: In relationships, nice guys become overly submissive, non-confrontational, and even non-sexual. This makes them less attractive to their partners.
    • Sexual and Emotional Disconnect: Women are not attracted to men who are submissive and overly passive, leading to a lack of intimacy. Nice guys often allow their partners to behave freely, naively believing they wouldn’t be cheated on.
    • Resulting Divorce: Despite not engaging in any abusive or harmful behaviors, many nice guys experience repeated divorce or cheating due to their overly passive and submissive nature.
    3. The Codependent Woman
    • Attachment to the Wrong Parent: Similar to the nice guy, the codependent woman forms strong attachments to a deceitful or victimized parent, usually the one who blames the other. This creates unhealthy relationship dynamics later in life.
    • Ignoring Red Flags: Codependent women often latch onto partners who say the right things, even if their actions are contradictory, resulting in premature and unhealthy attachments.
    • Enduring Abuse: Just as they ignored the faults of a deceitful parent, codependent women ignore red flags in relationships, enduring abuse or neglect.
    4. Attracting Toxic Partners
    • Trauma Bonds: Both nice guys and codependent women tend to attract partners with trauma, allowing them to focus on their partner’s issues rather than confronting their own.
    • Sexual Distance: They mistakenly attribute their partner’s lack of intimacy to a natural disposition, not realizing their own submissive behavior diminishes their attractiveness.
    5. Course on Masculinity
    • The video concludes with an invitation to join a course designed to help men build self-esteem, boundaries, and respect in relationships, particularly for those struggling with repetitive toxic dynamics.

    • @benjaminkamau6414
      @benjaminkamau6414 Місяць тому

      Thanks for breaking down the points.. You've done it professionally

  • @kevinthompson2753
    @kevinthompson2753 Місяць тому +2

    Wow. This is so true. My dad died when I was 5 and i agree I looked to many loving mum for everything. I’ve carried this behaviour into my marriage to my cost. I became a pleaser giving every thing to my cost. I’m still in it and learning to reinvent myself.#livetildeath

  • @justz9435
    @justz9435 Місяць тому +5

    when you're too busy listening to what she says instead of paying attention to how she responds... you're on a one way ticket to the friend zone.

  • @jcims
    @jcims 13 днів тому

    This is incredible. I'm 51 years old and this is the first time someone decoded my life for me. It's crazy. Thank you.

  • @luketimewalker
    @luketimewalker Місяць тому +1

    "SIMPLICITY IS THE ULTIMATE SOPHISTICATION" - Leonardo da Vinci
    "The best of us are masters of compression" - Bono.
    Mad props to your mom for pushing you on the world stage! You're a blessing to men AND women Sadia! 🏆

  • @Noble99218
    @Noble99218 Місяць тому +3

    Every guy is a nice guy with these type of nice guys what it is,they’re doing too much I’m a nice guy and have no problem getting women it’s about having patience that goes a long way.

  • @D1Snr
    @D1Snr Місяць тому +1

    Sadia is so impressive and knowledgeable. Its amazing how she is right on so many subjects.

  • @juanthorndikevaldez4318
    @juanthorndikevaldez4318 Місяць тому +3

    You'r analisis is very precise , I use to have the nice guy complex but I was so disrespected by women , that over time I don 't trust them anymore . Solitude seems to be a better long term partener. Either that or I'll become Jack the Ripper

  • @adldeeps24
    @adldeeps24 21 день тому

    Sadia how in a single lifetime, you are able to decode all of this. Entire population keep struggling with relationships all through life and here you have decoded all of it like essential oil extract. Bless You

  • @nightjournal3335
    @nightjournal3335 Місяць тому +1

    I think what I’ve learned, having struggled with these problems, is that the times I’ve stepped up to do the right thing, to help someone, or to complement someone it’s always been well received. However when I do that stuff for approval it’s usually very transparent (this video helped me connect that dot).
    From what I’ve come to understand is that a woman will want a man who will not allow himself to be manipulated by girls. Which is kind of what having boundaries and the self respect to tell other women no demonstrates. I also know myself that I don’t want to be like that.
    It’s important for a man to learn that, and the only way you can find a woman who can truly love you is to recognize whether they hold you to that standard

  • @SA-vz7qi
    @SA-vz7qi Місяць тому +3

    Good explanation of the cause of some "nice guy" situations, but not all.
    However, it is a far more sensible description than I have ever heard from a woman trying to explain it. I can think of a few more causes but getting at least some of the answer is a big step forward.

  • @kuramobay2445
    @kuramobay2445 Місяць тому +16

    Nice guys tend to find partners among women whom they know outside of dating. There's time to really get to know each other without the pressure of dating. The women who actively pursue dating without commitment are of no benefit to a nice guy anyway.

    • @BartokNeeskens
      @BartokNeeskens Місяць тому

      @@kuramobay2445 Women usually pick bad boys because its very easy to morally blackmail those people. Its very difficult to morally blackmail a nice guy. That's why women shun them

  • @vettie
    @vettie Місяць тому +8

    It's back there, bro.

  • @LeviHeatonIII
    @LeviHeatonIII 16 днів тому +1

    Right. Got it. Don't be too mean. Don't be too nice. Be rich. Be at least six feet tall. Be vulnerable. Don't emotions. Got it.

  • @miketan373
    @miketan373 Місяць тому +1

    yeah its true to the root, my dad was not there or only very little at home and suffered from this till my 30s; altough I learned to get my way around it, and today I do not have problems like this anymore; I know I can get most woman I like but I do not necessarily need to. It is so true what you say about the focus on the woman when growing up does indeed give you a mindset difficult to get rid of ! What can you do where you come from. Important is, there are woman not for my type, and I better stay away from them. Its interesting how psychology works in a persons life, tnx

  • @forward_ever_ever2595
    @forward_ever_ever2595 Місяць тому +10

    Its a given that many ppl may have issues, but i think that many women today are very toxic. Why is it the problem is always wt the man? When u are having a problem wt everyone thats when u need to examine self. Society i think have created a very entitled spirit im most women. "He is too nice" "he is not making enough money" " he's too short" "he's not nice at all"...i mean like w.t.h. Start to examine some of these women too and help them cause many of em are just outright toxic

    • @Candy_Mountain
      @Candy_Mountain Місяць тому +1

      She literally just talked about that

  • @bkeen7013
    @bkeen7013 Місяць тому +17

    Oh my God...she looks even better standing up. Wasn't expecting to get hit with that.

  • @rizalukman7982
    @rizalukman7982 29 днів тому

    Thank you for the video.Its not many women who is talking about nice guy as open and honest as you are

  • @SHORT-FRIDAYS
    @SHORT-FRIDAYS Місяць тому +2

    I'm a nice guy and my mother was not a victim but she was very confrontational with people in public like complaining about every meal in a restaurant, ettc....which, in turn, made me more passive and shuttered at the thought of any type of confrontation.

  • @andrewgage6942
    @andrewgage6942 5 днів тому

    Very much described my upbringing, relationships never lasted more than a few weeks, stopped looking for a relationship back in 1991, only had one female friendship since then

  • @bfitnessjoe
    @bfitnessjoe Місяць тому +1

    The Art of Manipulation was the title of the book that ended my nice guy approach to women. I learned eye opening tactics of what women naturally seemed to have acquired throughout their life. Identifying those traits was critical to my ability to literally get any woman I want. Sadly honesty get tossed out the window and omitting information is now the way. Men are logical. Women are emotional. It has always struck me sad to know that women can be controlled and guided simply by playing on their emotions. It’s the fastest way into their pants before they even know why they let you into their bed in the first place. Yes I have been many women’s mistake, but I got mines. 😊

  • @katafrakt33
    @katafrakt33 Місяць тому +1

    OMG, It's about me! THANK YOU. Your lecture's shed a new light on my love life. Now I have another target to work on.

  • @ssabrams2564
    @ssabrams2564 Місяць тому +1

    This is thee best breakdown ive ever heard

  • @KM-00
    @KM-00 25 днів тому +1

    I figured this out many years ago by myself during my late teens/early 20s, but damn, its still something thats difficult to overcome when you dont have a good example to lean on... especially when you developed mental health issues...

  • @lundril
    @lundril Місяць тому +11

    I am a nice guy. I experienced the friendzone problem first hand, many times... and I can tell you: This has absolutely nothing at all to do with the relationship to my parents... and because I have female friends I never got the idea that females are "non-sexual". This whole presentation is so much overgeneralization, that this has nothing to do with reality.

  • @jackburton2946
    @jackburton2946 Місяць тому +5

    Nice guys and suckers are not the same.

  • @HarrisNMeo
    @HarrisNMeo Місяць тому +9

    Recently my 5 and a half year relationship ended with the woman I thought was the love of my life ending up cheating on me and leaving me for her colleague. This was also my first ever relationship. I was the quintessential nice guy, wholehearted giver, a hopeless romantic. Not having boundaries. But now I have learnt that I will be the caring loving kind person I am but I'll also be enforcing my boundaries.

  • @LJmarch
    @LJmarch 14 днів тому +1

    Too be honest, she's not wrong. But a conference isn't necessary. You learn over time. You create your standards , it either grows within your relationship or grows within you after being around block. Just be yourself, don't compromise on your morals and you'll be ok.

  • @datingskillz9718
    @datingskillz9718 20 днів тому

    You can be nice and still get women and relationships on your terms. It's all about recognizing what doesn't serve you and removing those things from your life. One of the things that make a big difference is learning to set boundaries and to use the word NO more often and not feel guilty for using it.

  • @keithmawodzwa
    @keithmawodzwa Місяць тому +5

    yes we're all watching for the advice!

    • @keithmawodzwa
      @keithmawodzwa Місяць тому

      @@abdulrhmanw8297 And she liked my comment

  • @unlockdaniel
    @unlockdaniel 13 днів тому

    Honestly this is the truth that just makes me want to fully give up on love and intimacy. I’m not a man who feels they have to assert their dominance in the relationship, and if I have to stop being myself and fit into a box that women will find attractive, I’d rather not date at all

  • @Clint_the_Audio-Photo_Guy
    @Clint_the_Audio-Photo_Guy 16 днів тому

    Wow, I learned something about myself and all my past failed relationships. I'm a product of a broken home, my father left me as a small child and I grew up with my mom. I am most definitely a nice guy to women. I will do anything for them. Apparently, this is why women don't want to jump my bones?

  • @ryanbarker3978
    @ryanbarker3978 23 дні тому +1

    This doesn't just happen due to disconnected fathers. Sometimes, a man just has a very emotionally underdeveloped or abusive mother.
    My father has great social skills, though it never mattered, as my mother has verbatim told us that she does not believe in emotional intelligence. She still sees me as a six year old. I'm thirty.
    Society is not set up to course correct for emotionally immature women; it just assumes that women are the more emotionally mature gender. Which essentially means that subset of women wreck havoc on their children.
    It took me three decades to heal from this.

  • @avjam
    @avjam Місяць тому +1

    Im always impressed with Sadia's make up and outfit. Love it.

  • @81-mtz
    @81-mtz Місяць тому +15

    Sadia is so smart and beautiful

    • @bushidomayfield5784
      @bushidomayfield5784 Місяць тому +2

      You too 😊😊

    • @81-mtz
      @81-mtz Місяць тому +2

      @@bushidomayfield5784aww, ty 😘

    • @bushidomayfield5784
      @bushidomayfield5784 Місяць тому +2

      @@81-mtz you’re welcome

    • @K4R3N
      @K4R3N Місяць тому

      Get in line!

    • @Priyansh-s1p
      @Priyansh-s1p Місяць тому +2

      I agree. She looks more better when she is standing.

  • @the1vacayspot561
    @the1vacayspot561 Місяць тому +5

    Men being more picky on what they require from a woman physically and appearance wise both in terms of sex AND commitment will cure dating and relationships for men across the board. Match the pickyness level of women and actually only go after women you TRULY find physically appealing. Women value resources well, men should be choosy on valuing beauty and youth (she should be at least 23 years old) and they dont do so to the level they should. More humble pie for women would be digested and dating would be more balanced for the average man. But the reason why women have egos now and choices they dont qualify for compared to their average opposite sex counterparts is because men will sleep with anything. That HAS to stop. Start making women earn and work for shit in the sexual and dating market.

  • @reactionaction194
    @reactionaction194 18 днів тому +1

    They get friendzoned because they don’t make moves to show sexual interest, seek approval too much, or have a backbone to stand up for themselves. That’s pretty much it from what I’ve seen

    • @MrHDProd
      @MrHDProd 16 днів тому

      This 💯💯💯

  • @onemanarmy4435
    @onemanarmy4435 Місяць тому +5

    Nice Guys can't reject women.
    They put women on pedestal.

  • @Priyansh-s1p
    @Priyansh-s1p Місяць тому +2

    Sadia more videos on how to be healthy masculine ,& leading in relationship. What if someone takes better decisions than you. Will it be turn off for girls.

  • @yourfavoriteentertainment
    @yourfavoriteentertainment 19 днів тому

    Neglectful, uninvolved, sometimes abusive father? Why is this so relatable?

  • @kuombokatv3238
    @kuombokatv3238 Місяць тому +4

    Thank you for this wonderful information. I am that nice guy. I have learnt this through you.
    I have also learnt the importance of setting boundaries. I have learnt it very late...

  • @dustyk103
    @dustyk103 Місяць тому +3

    That was one of the greatest assessments of why being a good man fails because we don’t have a balance. It seems extremely few men are balanced in life. Most of us fall into the extremes of our cultures. In the West, we are taught to love others and sacrifice for them, but not properly taught to take care of ourselves. In eastern cultures they are taught selfishness to the point they rape women and believe that makes them masculine. Christianity teaches righteous relationships, but is taught poorly by most. It took me a lifetime to learn properly. Wish you had talked to me when I was a young fool. Now I’m too old to benefit from the wisdom I’ve acquired to find a great wife.

    • @kingedward3136
      @kingedward3136 22 дні тому

      Islam also teaches righteous relationships. The dating game creates a big mess in men and women

    • @dustyk103
      @dustyk103 22 дні тому

      @ Islam’s idea of a “righteous relationship” is women submitting to men as servants. Dot. Try to compare it to the teachings of Jesus. I’ve read the Koran and know what Muhammad said of women.

    • @kingedward3136
      @kingedward3136 19 днів тому

      ​@dustyk103
      Your comment has no back up to support your tall claim
      Frankly, it is driven by Islamophobia. You certainly have not read the Quran or know anything about the status of women in Islam.
      Muslim women were given the right to inheritance, the right to her own personal income, the right to demand a divorce etc before any western country did back 1400 years ago. you have to be extremely biased to make such a foolish comment in the age of the internet where anyone can ascertain the validity of your claim. Others can read to find out here
      files.alislam.cloud/pdf/Woman-in-Islam.pdf

    • @kingedward3136
      @kingedward3136 19 днів тому

      ​@@dustyk103Your seem to confuse hinduism with Islam. Women in hinduism are treated like chattel to the point they need to commit sati when their husband a.k.a owner dies.

    • @kingedward3136
      @kingedward3136 19 днів тому

      Women in Islam are not required to take on their husband's last name when they marry. They maintain their own identity. In all other religions they have to take on the husband's last name signifying a change in ownership.

  • @themischievousgentleman5521
    @themischievousgentleman5521 Місяць тому +1

    I feel so called out. Damn!

  • @joebeta1837
    @joebeta1837 Місяць тому +1

    A guy once posted on YT: if a girl doesn't begin or end her sentence with, "...and he's really attractive," she won't like you.

  • @eliriekeberg7127
    @eliriekeberg7127 Місяць тому +10

    No. This can’t be right.
    I always asked deeper questions, wanted to know more. Wanted to listen. And she shut down, and told me to stop caring so much.
    I will never care about what a woman says or wants ever again.

    • @sadiapsychology
      @sadiapsychology  Місяць тому +13

      I understand how discouraging that can feel. It’s tough when your efforts aren’t appreciated, but don’t let one experience define your approach to relationships. The right person will value and appreciate your depth and care-stay true to yourself. 💪

    • @keithmawodzwa
      @keithmawodzwa Місяць тому

      @@sadiapsychology it's good to know you read the comments

    • @avjam
      @avjam Місяць тому +3

      Please stop generalising women. I know a lot of women who would love to hear deep questions. You dated an absolute DUD. You didnt realise this that you were dating a low quality woman. Im sorry but i have to tell you.But the issue is you think we are all the same.

    • @eliriekeberg7127
      @eliriekeberg7127 Місяць тому

      @@sadiapsychology thank you Sadia.

    • @victorsheldon7961
      @victorsheldon7961 Місяць тому +2

      @@avjam Beause women always be with another woman or a group of women that are all the same and taking souless encouragements, so yeah women make it hard to tell the difference. The world operates on generalizations wheres women do the same to men too

  • @SAPADJAAbotchiLighousson
    @SAPADJAAbotchiLighousson Місяць тому +2

    incredebly useful.
    suggestions: TRY TO SLOW DOWN SOMETIMES WHEN WALKING

  • @vahjayjayaddict
    @vahjayjayaddict Місяць тому +1

    I friend zoned a woman one time when i just met her. It drove her mad. She kept flirting every time we met to get herself unzoned. But i knew her strategy. It hurt her pride that me, lowly me, had friendzoned her. So she was going to undo it, get me attracted to her, & then put me in the friendzone. It did not work for her.

  • @jesmcalli
    @jesmcalli Місяць тому +2

    We get told to be “nice” and that’s not what they want, we’re told “just be yourself” when that’s not what they want. All so that, perhaps, we’ll have a shot at a woman with an extensive history of dating scumbags who mistreated her, and having to deal with damage we didn’t cause. It’s madness. Hard pass on all that😂

  • @devontorres6449
    @devontorres6449 18 днів тому

    You definitely serve a group of people that may need it but it’s not all that hard. I’m considered a nice guy but I know my worth, I know I’m a nice guy and I expect to get back what I put in. If not move on there’s plenty of women out there. love yourself first and be honest to yourself and the other person and let them know about transparency. I’m no expert but I think if you do love yourself enough it shows and women do respect you. Major sign of self love is confidence to be you and not care of others think other than your own happiness and that can include another person (spouse). Women like confidence (don’t get extreme)

  • @milochamp1586
    @milochamp1586 22 дні тому +1

    Looks like from what you're saying, though I help people a lot, I don't belong to the nice guy category with women because no woman in a relationship ever stop liking touching me till the last day. You mentioned women stop or reduce touching a nice guy in a relationship.

    • @jerryg3652
      @jerryg3652 14 днів тому

      Yeah. I wonder what category we belong in. Although, some of the other things she says still makes sense to me.

  • @merlinch4256
    @merlinch4256 Місяць тому

    You put into precise words what I had observed in my life. Quite a program... Thank you, Sadia

  • @Doberman_6773
    @Doberman_6773 Місяць тому +2

    Brothers, if you feel this is talking to you, get yourself a copy of 'No More Mr. Nice Guy', and read thru it several times.

  • @Qadeer-g7w
    @Qadeer-g7w Місяць тому

    Following you for while and your usually very accurate on the majority.

  • @Calypso694
    @Calypso694 17 днів тому +1

    women always go after "the nice guy" once they realize all the toxic dudes have used them up.

  • @rajendrabareto8065
    @rajendrabareto8065 Місяць тому +1

    I was a nice guy and then got fed up of being nice and got misused. I am still a nice guy without any girlfriends where many girls like me a lot and want me to their. What I learnt is why can’t woman also be nice?

  • @tvgameskiller5286
    @tvgameskiller5286 23 дні тому

    It's difficult sadia, it's difficult

  • @howequalspeace
    @howequalspeace 17 днів тому

    You have to talk to your woman and tell her what you need. And you have to call them on their BS when you see it. Don’t hesitate.

  • @jonathangriffin8060
    @jonathangriffin8060 12 днів тому

    It is amazing that the fact that women who say that the nice guy that gets "friendzoned" are the ones they try to get in a relationship when the bad boys they actually date treat them with blatant disrespect and they actually try to date them and act shocked when the "nice guy" doesn't want them or move on to someone else or just stay single. I also found out that these women also have "daddy issues" and date the "bad boys" to get the attention that they didn't get growing up.

  • @jabs3005
    @jabs3005 Місяць тому

    Good job Sadia you make so much sense. I was always one of those nice guys. 💯👌🏾

    • @sadiapsychology
      @sadiapsychology  Місяць тому +1

      Im glad it was, You can change your future. You Got This! 💪

  • @mayside102
    @mayside102 20 днів тому

    Awesome advice young lady thanks for sharing

  • @evianx1
    @evianx1 25 днів тому +1

    What's really sad is how many men have been raised by their mothers. This is going to become a real problem in the future

  • @abdulrhmanw8297
    @abdulrhmanw8297 Місяць тому +1

    This was me 5 years ago ever since i realized that i stayed single to this day. Tried to heal from it i could’t to this day

  • @buicklincoln
    @buicklincoln 19 днів тому

    The best way to get out of the friend zone is to refuse to stay in it when a woman tells them they are. Tell the woman that friendship isn't acceptable and then walk away. Don't be surprised when eventually she comes back to you because you showed some you know whats by demanding what you want.

  • @stavrosharamis3002
    @stavrosharamis3002 Місяць тому +2

    I never get friendzoned, I always get blocked ! Haahahaha more than once and they keep on blocking me , they keep on holding on!

  • @taylorsampson5434
    @taylorsampson5434 Місяць тому +1

    The Toxic Guy or the Non Chalant Guy is able to keep all of her emotions engaged because he does whatever he wants and she can’t do anything about it. When she feels she has control and he’s made the relationship his everything. She’s done

  • @hummelperformance
    @hummelperformance Місяць тому +1

    Sadia represents my dream girl and im not settling for less than that. Very firm in her boundaries, confident and sexy as hell!!!

  • @BullRonin
    @BullRonin Місяць тому

    Hit hard. Advice I wish I learned a loooong time ago.