My fantasy self reads about 30 books a month, drinks the fancy coffee (rather than tea all the time), is a dress size smaller, wears bright raspberry coloured lipstick, clothes in colours *other* than black and uses all of my exercise dvds on a regular basis while also doing yoga, pilates, and running daily. I hope to actually meet her one day lmao.
I've never come across the phrase "fantasy self" before, but it explains a lot! I've been buying for this person a fair bit. Thank you for the insight!
This is a really important video. I don't think I've ever seen anyone tackle this topic in relation to minimalism and decluttering. My fantasy self is the reason I have trouble getting rid of things and I had no idea until I watched this!
I tend to shop for my fantasy self. Like... "wow this dress would be amazing on a cruise, or a trip to Hawaii..." then by the time I actually go on a trip I'm not interested in that item anymore 😂
I do this too. I've realized it's more fun to shop for the trip when it's actually planned and in the near future... when I shop for fantasy trips the item is usually off-trend or not what I'm looking for by the time the actual opportunity comes up!
My fantasy self was a soccer star, ballerina, florist, linguist, etc. The list could seriously go on. I had cleats, ballet slippers, books on gardening, language learning programs, etc. I came across the "fantasy self" concept five years ago from Miss Minimalist's blog. I'm happy to report that I got rid of most of that and am now living a life that is more authentic to my truest desires. A huge perk from this is having more time to become really good at what I love instead of being mediocre at a lot of things.
I love this mindset. I didn't even realize how much I was doing this everyday. I have so many wish lists and dream life fantasies that are holding me back from focusing on what I have now.
I've also been doing this with my wardrobe. My fantasy self is 45 lbs thinner and I have a hard time parting with things that no longer fit me because I don't want to give up on myself. Although the majority of the clothes probably wouldn't be something I even care about once I lose the weight. Reality vs fantasy is a hard pill to swallow. Thanks for bringing this topic to light!
If you do ever lose weight again, think about how much more fun it will be to shop for new clothes then :) I think Allison is right to say that we need to remember, getting rid of something doesn't close the door on that opportunity.
Yes this!! I've definitely had the experience of parting with clothes that are too snug, and I remind myself that if I ever do drop a size, there will never be a shortage of on-trend, fashionable items in stores to shop for. In fact, it's more likely that anything I hold onto will become dated anyway and I'll want a fresh look!
My problem is that I have like 30 fantasy selves and I need to declutter which one I'm chasing 😂. Sometimes I'm a stellar mom who has adopted 3 babies through foster care, other times I'm sitting on a beach in Thailand soaking up the single life. Then there are times I'm a total yogi pro, and others when I dream of being a full time artist. I want it all. 😂
This is such an intriguing topic. Like you said the Fantasy Self comes the hopes and dreams and Fantasy Self is usually a better version of you and it can be very difficult to come to terms and acknowledge you will never be that better version of yourself. Then it’s even harder to be ok with the loss of who you wish you could be.
I love the perfect descriptive details in your fantasy-self scenarios. They gave me a good laugh. It's so easy to get caught up in thinking we can be that person in the perfect photo in a magazine. The perfect sweater for boating (never go boating), all those perfect high heal shoes in the closet (rarely wear heels), the skis (rarely ski). Isn't it just so true? My fantasy self does lots of hiking. I spent $60 on hiking boots, but I hike so rarely that I justify the purchase by wearing them to work in the yard. And the yoga mat... still in my closet along with that block thingy that people use when they can't reach all the way to the floor, because my real self would need it, if I did yoga.
This is so true - I thought I was the only person guilty of this. I've realised I have so many fantasy selves - but probably the most prominent one is my fantasy skinny self! I literally have a whole wardrobe (plus boxes stored throughout the house) containing all the clothes I will never, EVER fit into again. Before watching this video I felt desperation every time I saw these clothes; it felt like they were mocking my rounder self. But now I actually feel liberated - when I wore all those clothes I wasn't a mother, I was an unhealthy weight, and although in my fantasies I am wearing those clothes, I don't actually want to be that person anymore. So thank you so much Allison, you've helped open my eyes and I'm going to start packing up those clothes to donate to charity. xx
My fantasy self has been fantasy playing guitar for about 10 years now. I have dragged that guitar from Hawaii to New York to Texas and maybe picked it up twice a year in that time. Oops. Love this video! Such an interesting concept. I'm sure there are so many other things my fantasy self is doing-- even at work-- that I can let go of. I feel like this not only helps you get rid of the stuff itself, but also helps you get rid of those daily reminders that you are not living your fantasy life. The anxiety of not "making" enough time or money to do all of the things you feel like you SHOULD be doing (see, you already have the stuff to do if, self!) can really get you down when you feel like you're already operating at capacity.
I loooove this video, Allison! I love it because it went beyond the standard, "Try to own minimal items" mindset, and dug deeper into the emotion aspect of why we hold onto things. My fantasy items? DEFINITELY going-out dress and heels that I convinced myself I'd wear all the time in the city. 7 years later, I maybe wear one once every year and a half. Please do more videos like this! Accepting who you are, who you've become, and that it's okay if you're not the "fantasy you." Thanks, girl
When I had a fantasy self, she was a solid chef who bought fancy cookbooks and had a Whole Foods and Williams Sonoma budget. One day, I just got tired of her cluttering up my kitchen shelves and depleting my bank account, so I asked her to move out and take all her crap with her. I don’t miss her one bit and I still eat well :)
I loved the sailing example, very funny and I can totally relate to that image we can get in our heads! I've been reflecting on this recently as I realise I have a complex relationship with clothes that I am starting to understand better. Where I get confused is Fantasy Self vs Best Self, ie I don't want to declutter items that I like and want to wear but have lacked the confidence to wear in the past for example. I think there is a grey area between the two, ie if you've been unemployed and depressed and have only worn tracksuits for a while, it makes sense to have some smarter clothes in your wardrobe to help you get ready to return to work, interview etc - this would be 'Best Self.' Whereas the Fantasy Self would be having lots of beautiful office clothes in your wardrobe when you work as a welder and never need to wear office clothes. I think it can be tricky working out which is which, a lot of denial can be going on in our heads as well as grief ie grieving a lifestyle you initially wanted but now realise you no longer want or can't have due to your current circumstances. I think my Fantasy Self is a rich woman who regularly goes out for drinks, coffee and meals with her rich glamorous friends in fancy blazers. Whereas my Best Self is a freelancer who is also stylish but has clothes that are practical for working from home as well as going out for coffee, meals etc. She's not really into bars and alcohol so she doesn't own many clothes for those sorts of places but she also doesn't live in tracksuits and scruffs all the time lol.
Another concept similar to the fantasy self is aspirational. Especially aspiration makeup but also like aspirational craft supplies, clothes, kitchen gadgets, etc.
aukluk i think they are similar but not the same. Aspirations is almost like a journey to somewhere. Fantasy self it seems it's like one has not even started and even started and there is no journey/progress. Could be wrong
this video is blowing my mind. fantasy Amber is a huge hiking fanatic but I have such a hard time making time to go. It reminds me of a lesson in "This is How" by Augusten Burroughs, that if you think you love something but have difficulty making time for it, it's obviously not a real priority. Thank you so much for this wisdom, Allison!
I sometimes use my sewing machine to justify the price I paid for it LOL. For example, a new cover for a home gadget or a bed sheet will cost $20. I sew it myself, deduct the materials price, and deduct the final amount from the sewing machine price. So far I think I justified about 30-40% hahaha )))
I never heard of this concept but, it makes sense. There have been items I have purchased before with some sort of intention that is never realized. I now try to be more mindful when I go shopping. This has helped me to pick out items I have an actual need for and can reuse without getting bored. I really enjoyed this video! 😊✌🏽️
Haha my fantasy self was also really good at walking in high heels! My fantasy self also wears colourful lipsticks, uses washi-tape on a regular basis and reads difficult, long books in her free time :/
MissKriekentaart Washi tape. 🙌 I just keep buying it for my bullet journal (which I have been using for a year but have never had the urge to decorate, haha).
Oh my gosh, the lipsticks. Fantasy Allison has a need for 15 red lipsticks even though real Allison hates how high maintenance they are and wears lip balm instead.
I keep convincing myself that those kits with 2-5 lipstick shades are a great deal, that I get more variety for the price, but really, instead of ending up with one color that I really like and can wear almost everyday, I end up with 3-5 lipsticks that are just meh, straight up unflattering, or just way outside of my comfort zone...! My world for the perfect nudey pink! xD
My fantasy self reads 300 page books on international relations and philosophy. I buy and have so many books but cannot bear to get rid of any of them!
I think it is very easy to convince yourself to buy it instead of going to a library, because going to a library is a bigger effort and commitment. You think there is a higher chance of you reading it if you have it :) I did that a lot too :)
Also guilty +purplepoppy07- but I do read them. However there are lots of them. One thing I do is box up all the books I definitely know I'm never going to read, and bring them to the local library. I get a tax credit (donation in kind) for the books they decide to put into the system, and the rest goes to a book sate that supports the library. Last year, I got $50. I live in Canada. It may not be a thing where you are. However, depending on the books, you can donate them to a hospital, or a cancer center, even a shelter or a prison. I've also posted a list of really great books my real self was never going to read, and ended up giving them to friends. I'm a lot more mindful in my book purchases now. Still buy some, a lot less, and I actually read more now that my bookshelves are rid of my fantasy self books.
Great suggestion Sonia! donating them to your local library will keep the burden off of you, put keep the books available to read should you still want to. I also have a well-read fantasy self. The good part about the decluttering process for me was once I started I couldn't stop! It felt so relieving, I thought "Well, what else can I get rid of?!" excitedly. I personally sold my books for money at a local book store, but I did make $40 more than I was expecting rather than donating it! I have donated a lot of clothes, and sold the really good more niche items on eBay for money as well. Made some decent money there too!
Wow!what a revolutionary concept..my mind is completely blown right now..thank you for sharing! Also..the scary thought of parting with part of your fantasy self can also scare you so much you acctually start doing the activity! So much to think about right now...
Haha yep. Whenever Real Allison goes on Zillow to look at houses, Fantasy Allison manages to set the search parameters to $10 million requiring a tennis court and detached guest house (Fantasy Allison also plays tennis).
This is the 3rd video I've watched about a fantasy self. I can't believe I hadn't heard of it before. Things make much more sense since I've started learning about it.
I had an epiphany when I saw this title and listened to your story. It gave such a different perspective on the things I own. Never knew why I collected certain things. I have tons of lingerie never wear. I bought them because they were so beautiful. Thanks for making this video. I'll be thinking about this subject for days.
Oh my goodness thank you for giving this a name. Without realising I have been decluttering my fantasy self for a few years now. The baker, preserve maker, clothes making, veggie growing fantasy self. Now that I have a name for it I can see so many other things in my life that I can now cull, and actually embrace who I really am without feeling less. Thanks Allison.
I just have to say...... I am so inspired to rummage though my house and rethink some of the items i have held onto! I have been slowly trying to adapt to a more minimalist way of living. And the moment you mentioned the high heels, my eyes immediately darted over to the MANY boxes of shoes stacked up on my closet floor . I love this Allison. Thanks for sparking my brain to look at these things in a different light.
My fantasy self has huge fancy parties where I need every kind of serving platter, glasses etc my whole spare bedroom closet is full of extra serving pieces. Oh my gosh I havent had a party in years!
Love this video! I had no idea that this was an actual thing but it's so true. I got home from backpacking last year and had a major sort out of my wardrobe, and by major sort out I mean packed away all the clothes that don't fit me into a suitcase (or two) with the intention of losing weight and fitting into them again. Well, it's one year on and I haven't lost weight and even if I did I doubt I would wear the clothes that I packed up a year ago (that haven't actually fit me in several years.) I feel like I need to be ruthless and get rid of stuff!
This topic really resonated with me, not in terms of possessions, but more so the me I thought I would be with my "fantasy life". In reality, I have a really complicated family dynamic. Without being specific, I am struggling to live my real~life life with joy, forgiveness, and grace. I want and need to let go of the life that isn't really where I am now, and move forward with acceptance and hope❤️
I came over from the Messy Minimalist's channel. She mentioned your video. Ugh, I have several things coming to mind right now. Time to fill up the car and head to the donation center!! haha! Thanks for the motivation!
I love how authentic you were in this video with this topic! I think we could all use a reality check when it comes to catering to our fantasy life versus real life! Loved this video, it inspired me to do some more decluttering!!
Wow! I have tons of stuff that are for 'if I ever...'. Thank you for pointing out that getting rid of a physical item does not mean getting rid of the dream/desire. I've been trying to purge and live more minimally, this is going to help so much!
This concept is sooo real! I thought it was just me but as I'm scrolling through the comments it looks like we all have similar versions of our fantasy selves... Fantasy girl is apparently playing all of us and taking our money lol 😂
I had never heard of this before but the second I saw the title of this video I knew exactly what your were talking about. I do this! I am planning a big purge of my entire wardrobe tomorrow so I'm so glad I saw this today!
And yes, of course I have a fantasy self... My fantasy self is enjoying summer to the fullest, going out with friends, going to the beach (although there aren't any beaches here in Austria), travelling to other countries, but my actual self doesn't like hot weather, is an introvert that rarely goes out, doesn't like to be in the water in front of many people and only made it to Vienna once this year. My actual self embraces fall colours and fancies snowy days in with her family and friends. You got me thinking, I should reconsider and declutter my fantasy self. :)
One of the best videos that I've seen in a while! Is this real me or fantasy me is an amazing way to look at things. Can you link the article you read about it? So fascinating
YES! Thank you for this! I never knew there was a name for it. Which fits quite well by the way, and I think you explained it perfectly. You're not necessarily wiping out that "goal/dream" just being realistic about it. I've slowly been getting rid of these fantasy self indulgences over the past few years. I realized I'd much rather have space and stick to a few classic options, rather than have a variety of options for "just in case" scenarios.
Before moving to NYC I drove everywhere. So I wore heels and had big handbags. Now that I walk everywhere I wear comfortable shoes and use smaller handbags. The city changes you.
LOL! I've never heard this concept before, but it's so true! My fantasy self thinks she can sew, and imagines herself putting together amazing scrapbooks of her travels. But the reality is my sewing machine gathers dust because I can't sew a straight line and always tangle my bobbin, and the last time I made a "scrapbook" it was uploading photos to Shutterfly 4 years ago with a free book coupon code, and even that seemed like too much effort.
Allison, this video was SO GOOD! I was totally laughing when you came clean about the sweater for sailing. I'm sure I have pieces like that and now I'm going to go through my wardrobe to get rid of them! You also have inspired me to let go of more heels! I just never wear them anymore. Even for events where I could wear them, I usually opt for flats now because I don't want to be in pain the whole time. So THANK YOU for filming this!
Found this video after searching for some on minimalism and just want to say THANK YOU! I’m trying improve myself and I definitely live (and shop!) for my fantasy self. As I declutter I’m going to start asking myself “who owns this, me or fantasy me?” Some of it is definitely a grey area though - I’m no yogi but the few times I do yoga I’m very glad to have a mat! I’m in my late 20s so it’s probably a good time to let “fantasy me” go.
I just wanted to update you that I absolutely loved this video, it was a new concept for me the idea of a fantasy self in respect to minimalism. I live on a boat and and constantly working to become more of a minimalist, partly out of necessity, but also because I genuinely want to live a conscious and deliberate life. Anyway, a day after watching your video I went through my shoes and found a few moldy pairs (oh boat life), one of the pairs I forgot I owned which definitely means I don't need to own them, there were also a few other pairs that I could have easily cleaned up but I thought about the idea of my fantasy self(who loves heels), and kept only the shoes I will really wear. Thanks again for sharing this video!
Ugh this is ME! Came here from Rachel at Messy Minimalist & this information is SO SPOT-ON & important to moving forward in decluttering. I will definitely be checking out more of your videos! I gave this one a thumbs up!
I've never heard of this idea before! My fantasy self definitely wears a lot more lipstick than real me. It's so pretty and colorful... and I NEVER wear it.
Yay I'm so excited your transitioning to more minimalism and simple living! My blog is also an aspiring minimalist:) love that you've got great ideas! I've been following your channel for a few years now and am happy you're changing things up!
omg, i've been decluttering my stuff over a year now, and wow, i really do need to declutter my fantasy-selves really. i think this was why i couldn't clear mind even after decluttering most of my stuff. decluttering one's fantasy-self could be another phrase for 'accepting oneself', but much BETTER.
thank you for this. it is hard not to get lost in the rabbit role of finding the perfect this and that and curating an image....this really helped take away a lot of guilt and pressure for me!!
Awesome video! Definitely something to think about :) I do have a hard time letting go of my fantasy self. I'll journal about it today and see what my brain comes up with.
Going back and watching your old videos... This really hit home! I live in Southern California and I have this furry vest I bought at Anthropologie years ago. Never worn! But my fantasy self keeps thinking one day when I find myself in heavy snow I'll wear it 😅
This is such an interesting topic! I realized long ago that my fantasy self is a great film-maker travelling around the world, but thankfully I don't splurge on fancy camera equipment or an executive class airplane ticket because I don't have the money to do so. But now that I think of it, my fantasy self also reads heavy fiction or classic books that real me don't have enough interest in reading them after buying them. I kept thinking that I'm going to read those books but it's been awhile since I have an interest to read them.
I know this video is already 3 years old and I'm very late to the comment section.. But I just wanted to say Thank you!! You explained the fantasy self concept so well, and this is something I have been struggling with a lot lately as I've been decluttering. My fantasy self apparently reads alll the books, does allll the crafts, and is a hardcore dvd and cd collector 😅 - whereas in reality I probably only use 10-20% of those items nowadays! Thank you, your video helped me understand the disconnect in my brain a bit betrer and I'm now going to attack my stuff with renewed vengeance 😊.
I think this happens with age... you become more aware, and just want to keep things simple. I guess in the end it’s becoming the “ real you “ 🙂 Interesting video!
Perfect as usual, I have been hanging onto every word. This is great stuff for me. Anyway, loved you're little boat story. That said it all for me, I'm like Ok gotcha, now gotta get busy. But like a comment below said that this is the reason she can't get rid of anything in the first place. I am so glad I found this channel. Another thing that many are probably not as bad with anymore as I am is the stuff you are either gonna fix someday or repurpose. I hate even letting myself think that. I have tools in the garage, well part of a tool or a strange looking screwy thing that I don't even know what it is or anything and now dozens of millions of this kinda thing is in the garage for that time that it would suck if you found what it went to or what you would need it for. That is horrible for me and this fantasy self is too now I guess. I cant' keep up with all the good stuff you have advised us of. Eye openers, even if it makes perfect sense it doesn't help us til we can do it and I feel you have given me the tools and steps needed.
I really loved this video Allison! I am familiar with the concept of "fantasy self" or as I call it "ideal me" and I think it can be positive in terms of goal setting and mind set but I never connected it to decluttering! I definitely have had moments where I buy for my fantasy self, and have gotten rid of items because of it. However, I do have a little process of getting rid of my fantasy self items, I usually try to do what I intended to do with it when I bought it, ex. going to yoga at 6 am all week and then deciding if I can still keep it in my life as long as I'm using it to better myself. But in the end. it just always feels better to get rid of stuff you don't use, and you'll likely forget about it once it's gone. Thanks for this vid! :)
I totally went through this phase. I blame instagram and pinterest haha. I literally bought so many heels and blazers when going through the paris chic phase and also got caught up buying different holiday outfits....the truth is when I'm on holiday I like zero fuss. I remember I always ended up wearing the cheap tube dresses that I bought locally instead of what I packed...it's crazy.
Lmao!!! You totally described me! I had no clue! I just thought, I was resourceful lately I’ve been question am I a hoarder but, your teaching sounds more like me of how I rationalize about certain items lol....I’m super shocked and soo enlightened!!! My next is that the moment I depart with certain items......something will come-up for me to have kept it and I’m going to be upset that I didn’t keep....uuugh.....I’m gonna soul search because I really do want to declutter of things of I don’t use at all and my mind🙏🏽Thank you - I loved this video!
Loved this and my fantasy self lives a far more glamorous lifestyle than I do. She loves things like faux fur, leather pants and glitter, while the real me doesn't have anywhere to wear it. So happy I'm not the only one. Thanks for sharing. Love your channel! :)
Totally agree! I used to buy extravagant clothing as well! it is so weird. and it took me a long time to realize, I don't like and wear those things... :)
haha! yeah I love to dress fashionable but if it doesn't feel comfortable or isn't in my easy outfit go-tos, there's no point in buying it because I don't wear anything I don't know how to, or feel comfy in.
OMG-I just recv'd a faux fur from Zara online & just asked for the return label today☺WTF, I am not wearing this coat even though it is gorgeous! Thanks for the laugh.♥
YES! This is what I've discovered. I like to be comfortable but cute. If it is fussy--I never grab it. Like I notice all the silk blouses sit there because I want cotton even when I go out☺ Fantasy me would have on the silk top with the faux fur I just returned! LOL
Love this look into deeper aspects of minimalism! Please continue to share these discoveries and personal insights with us 🤗 always a breath of fresh air
I love this! It’s what I needed to hear and honestly appreciate it way more than I could ever explain. I’ve never heard of this but it makes so much sense. My fantasy self is a little family woman, wife, mother, home owner of a little cottage that has huge closets and this masterful kitchen with ever coffee cup available. Hahaha. Thanks for this!!
I'm so glad you made a video on this topic! I had no idea this kind of behavior had a name. It's definitely going to make me think more critically about why I buy/hold on to certain items!
I’ve never thought about it this way.. I totally do this with a couple items!! This was exactly what I needed to get off the plateau I’ve been on the past couple weeks 🙏
This is such an eye opener! Fantasy me buy goeuro us Bohemian clothes that are flowy but never actually fit my natural curves and then never wear them haha! And all those art supplies but om determined to actually use them!
See this is so hard at the same time. Because I keep stuff, with my fantasy self in mind. Then I get pissed off with the clutter and get rid of it, yoga mat for example then I'll find myself a few weeks later at yoga or something regretting getting rid of my mat.
Just the other day, I was telling my mom that I have a shopping alter ego! My mom thought I was so weird, lol! I'm glad I'm not alone. I always see the cutest tanks and other super summery clothes, when I actually rarely wear them because the climate is fairly cool and rainy most of the year! I also really enjoy trying on unique and flashy clothing in the dressing room, but I dress business casual or casual most of the time. Whenever I go shopping, I have to ask myself if I really have a purpose for something or if it will just look pretty in my closet!
This is so interesting! I never knew a fantasy self was an actual thing but now you've explained it I think I can recognise better what is just my fantasy self vs an actual aspiration I'm working on. Thanks for the video!
This is SO me! My fantasy self is a super tidy minimalist ha ha! Thanks for helping me understand myself, my shopping habits and my clutter better! Fantasy self also keeps buying kitchen gear, clothes, jewelry. Looks like I have multiple fantasy selVES! This concept will help me declutter for real... next week ;-)
Love this. I had never heard of this before. I was buying shoes yesterday to wear to an outdoor wedding fantasy me tried on all the heels but knew deep down I needed the flats. The one crazy thing I have been holding on to (fantasy me) has been moving around and never used 50+ votive cups to be used for a party or wedding three moves later still have them. Thanks for this video
Hi! I have been interested in minimalism and intentional living for a long time, I've decluttered my physical and digital space... yet this is the first video ever where I have found some form of mental decluttering and I'm very glad I did. Thank you for posting this fascinating video. I hope you can delve into this even more! =)
Wow, this was a fantastic video! And the topic is fascinating. I tend to buy lots of art to hang on walls, whether it's a print of a Klimt painting, a concert poster or cool stuff ripped out of oversized magazines. The thing is...I'm a minimalist! In my lifestyle and also aesthetically. I have been a practicing minimalist for over a decade and I really like my clean white walls. But I really really love all kinds of art! I think my fantasy self is a rabid art collector that imagines she will have tons of extra walls to hang all this fabulous art. In reality, most of my walls are white and all my art is in my closet :)
i have loved your videos since day one Allison! It is youtubers like you who inspired me to make my own channel :) Thanks so much for sharing your ideas! xo
I came from the messy minimalist channel, where I came to know about this vdo of yours. Oh boy... What a wonderful concept. Eagerly waiting to de clutter my hoarding, thanks to my fantasy self. Thank you sooo much.
You totally crack me up! I love how down to earth you are and your ideas for minimalism are inspiring... definitely subscribing and putting them to use 😊
Thank you for this!! I almost bought a dress at Old Navy the other day before I realized that it was just something that Fantasy Erin would wear. What a helpful concept!
My fantasy self is an avid painter, an actual witch IRL (tarot decks, crystals, reiki certification, etc.), and recently... a minimalist. I’m trying really hard do follow through with that last one!
Thank you so much for this video ! This is what was missing for me to start understanding why I'm having so much of a hard time decluttering !! This will give me the extra push I needed !!
I did the same thing with hills!!! My husband does it with his Harley's .....yes plural . He has not rode in years but still holds on to two bikes and all the stuff that goes with them!
My fantasy self reads about 30 books a month, drinks the fancy coffee (rather than tea all the time), is a dress size smaller, wears bright raspberry coloured lipstick, clothes in colours *other* than black and uses all of my exercise dvds on a regular basis while also doing yoga, pilates, and running daily. I hope to actually meet her one day lmao.
Francelmo23 your fantasy self sounds like my fantasy self!😆
Your fantasy self sounds really boring. I bet you are much more fun than that! 😆
Lol this is a great comment
LOL, oh yes, I read a lot, love my tea, but yes the rest is so me. Oh, and my fantasy self has a spotless house and cooks a perfect meal every day
I've never come across the phrase "fantasy self" before, but it explains a lot! I've been buying for this person a fair bit. Thank you for the insight!
very same!
This is a really important video. I don't think I've ever seen anyone tackle this topic in relation to minimalism and decluttering. My fantasy self is the reason I have trouble getting rid of things and I had no idea until I watched this!
I tend to shop for my fantasy self. Like... "wow this dress would be amazing on a cruise, or a trip to Hawaii..." then by the time I actually go on a trip I'm not interested in that item anymore 😂
I do this too. I've realized it's more fun to shop for the trip when it's actually planned and in the near future... when I shop for fantasy trips the item is usually off-trend or not what I'm looking for by the time the actual opportunity comes up!
😂funny but true
My fantasy self was a soccer star, ballerina, florist, linguist, etc. The list could seriously go on. I had cleats, ballet slippers, books on gardening, language learning programs, etc. I came across the "fantasy self" concept five years ago from Miss Minimalist's blog. I'm happy to report that I got rid of most of that and am now living a life that is more authentic to my truest desires. A huge perk from this is having more time to become really good at what I love instead of being mediocre at a lot of things.
I love this mindset. I didn't even realize how much I was doing this everyday. I have so many wish lists and dream life fantasies that are holding me back from focusing on what I have now.
I've also been doing this with my wardrobe. My fantasy self is 45 lbs thinner and I have a hard time parting with things that no longer fit me because I don't want to give up on myself. Although the majority of the clothes probably wouldn't be something I even care about once I lose the weight. Reality vs fantasy is a hard pill to swallow. Thanks for bringing this topic to light!
If you do ever lose weight again, think about how much more fun it will be to shop for new clothes then :) I think Allison is right to say that we need to remember, getting rid of something doesn't close the door on that opportunity.
Yes this!! I've definitely had the experience of parting with clothes that are too snug, and I remind myself that if I ever do drop a size, there will never be a shortage of on-trend, fashionable items in stores to shop for. In fact, it's more likely that anything I hold onto will become dated anyway and I'll want a fresh look!
That is my fantasy self too!!
@@wendiburns6356 ...
My problem is that I have like 30 fantasy selves and I need to declutter which one I'm chasing 😂. Sometimes I'm a stellar mom who has adopted 3 babies through foster care, other times I'm sitting on a beach in Thailand soaking up the single life. Then there are times I'm a total yogi pro, and others when I dream of being a full time artist. I want it all. 😂
Lol
I just love listening to you talk! You're a really eloquent speaker with a lot of practical points and it's helpful and pleasant to listen to.
Laurel Y I feel the same!!!
Thank you!
This is such an intriguing topic. Like you said the Fantasy Self comes the hopes and dreams and Fantasy Self is usually a better version of you and it can be very difficult to come to terms and acknowledge you will never be that better version of yourself. Then it’s even harder to be ok with the loss of who you wish you could be.
I love the perfect descriptive details in your fantasy-self scenarios. They gave me a good laugh. It's so easy to get caught up in thinking we can be that person in the perfect photo in a magazine. The perfect sweater for boating (never go boating), all those perfect high heal shoes in the closet (rarely wear heels), the skis (rarely ski). Isn't it just so true? My fantasy self does lots of hiking. I spent $60 on hiking boots, but I hike so rarely that I justify the purchase by wearing them to work in the yard. And the yoga mat... still in my closet along with that block thingy that people use when they can't reach all the way to the floor, because my real self would need it, if I did yoga.
This is so true - I thought I was the only person guilty of this. I've realised I have so many fantasy selves - but probably the most prominent one is my fantasy skinny self! I literally have a whole wardrobe (plus boxes stored throughout the house) containing all the clothes I will never, EVER fit into again. Before watching this video I felt desperation every time I saw these clothes; it felt like they were mocking my rounder self. But now I actually feel liberated - when I wore all those clothes I wasn't a mother, I was an unhealthy weight, and although in my fantasies I am wearing those clothes, I don't actually want to be that person anymore. So thank you so much Allison, you've helped open my eyes and I'm going to start packing up those clothes to donate to charity. xx
lmao I feel called out & attacked by that yoga comment
Haha!!
Haha I'm throwing shade at all of the fantasy selves with this video!
Casey M. Lol...me too
My fantasy self created an entire yoga room in my apartment, and real me has done yoga in it twice the entire year. 😑
legslikewhoa I love your Fantasy Self’s commitment. “If you build it, she will do yoga”
My fantasy self has been fantasy playing guitar for about 10 years now. I have dragged that guitar from Hawaii to New York to Texas and maybe picked it up twice a year in that time. Oops. Love this video! Such an interesting concept. I'm sure there are so many other things my fantasy self is doing-- even at work-- that I can let go of. I feel like this not only helps you get rid of the stuff itself, but also helps you get rid of those daily reminders that you are not living your fantasy life. The anxiety of not "making" enough time or money to do all of the things you feel like you SHOULD be doing (see, you already have the stuff to do if, self!) can really get you down when you feel like you're already operating at capacity.
I loooove this video, Allison! I love it because it went beyond the standard, "Try to own minimal items" mindset, and dug deeper into the emotion aspect of why we hold onto things. My fantasy items? DEFINITELY going-out dress and heels that I convinced myself I'd wear all the time in the city. 7 years later, I maybe wear one once every year and a half.
Please do more videos like this! Accepting who you are, who you've become, and that it's okay if you're not the "fantasy you." Thanks, girl
When I had a fantasy self, she was a solid chef who bought fancy cookbooks and had a Whole Foods and Williams Sonoma budget. One day, I just got tired of her cluttering up my kitchen shelves and depleting my bank account, so I asked her to move out and take all her crap with her. I don’t miss her one bit and I still eat well :)
I loved the sailing example, very funny and I can totally relate to that image we can get in our heads! I've been reflecting on this recently as I realise I have a complex relationship with clothes that I am starting to understand better. Where I get confused is Fantasy Self vs Best Self, ie I don't want to declutter items that I like and want to wear but have lacked the confidence to wear in the past for example. I think there is a grey area between the two, ie if you've been unemployed and depressed and have only worn tracksuits for a while, it makes sense to have some smarter clothes in your wardrobe to help you get ready to return to work, interview etc - this would be 'Best Self.' Whereas the Fantasy Self would be having lots of beautiful office clothes in your wardrobe when you work as a welder and never need to wear office clothes. I think it can be tricky working out which is which, a lot of denial can be going on in our heads as well as grief ie grieving a lifestyle you initially wanted but now realise you no longer want or can't have due to your current circumstances. I think my Fantasy Self is a rich woman who regularly goes out for drinks, coffee and meals with her rich glamorous friends in fancy blazers. Whereas my Best Self is a freelancer who is also stylish but has clothes that are practical for working from home as well as going out for coffee, meals etc. She's not really into bars and alcohol so she doesn't own many clothes for those sorts of places but she also doesn't live in tracksuits and scruffs all the time lol.
Another concept similar to the fantasy self is aspirational. Especially aspiration makeup but also like aspirational craft supplies, clothes, kitchen gadgets, etc.
aukluk i think they are similar but not the same. Aspirations is almost like a journey to somewhere. Fantasy self it seems it's like one has not even started and even started and there is no journey/progress. Could be wrong
this video is blowing my mind. fantasy Amber is a huge hiking fanatic but I have such a hard time making time to go. It reminds me of a lesson in "This is How" by Augusten Burroughs, that if you think you love something but have difficulty making time for it, it's obviously not a real priority. Thank you so much for this wisdom, Allison!
My fantasy self uses my sewing machine and plays all the musical instruments i own.
JenExplainsItAll you're describing my fantasy self there too!
I sometimes use my sewing machine to justify the price I paid for it LOL. For example, a new cover for a home gadget or a bed sheet will cost $20. I sew it myself, deduct the materials price, and deduct the final amount from the sewing machine price. So far I think I justified about 30-40% hahaha )))
I never heard of this concept but, it makes sense. There have been items I have purchased before with some sort of intention that is never realized. I now try to be more mindful when I go shopping. This has helped me to pick out items I have an actual need for and can reuse without getting bored. I really enjoyed this video! 😊✌🏽️
This is such an interesting topic! ha! Thank you for sharing this! You did such a beautiful job articulating this and using examples!
Thank you! I'm glad you found it interesting! I could talk about it all day haha
Haha my fantasy self was also really good at walking in high heels! My fantasy self also wears colourful lipsticks, uses washi-tape on a regular basis and reads difficult, long books in her free time :/
MissKriekentaart Washi tape. 🙌 I just keep buying it for my bullet journal (which I have been using for a year but have never had the urge to decorate, haha).
haha yup, I buy mine for scrapbooking but I rarely actually use it. Now I only buy washi that's EXTREMELY cute (instead of just regular cute) 😁
Oh my gosh, the lipsticks. Fantasy Allison has a need for 15 red lipsticks even though real Allison hates how high maintenance they are and wears lip balm instead.
I keep convincing myself that those kits with 2-5 lipstick shades are a great deal, that I get more variety for the price, but really, instead of ending up with one color that I really like and can wear almost everyday, I end up with 3-5 lipsticks that are just meh, straight up unflattering, or just way outside of my comfort zone...! My world for the perfect nudey pink! xD
My fantasy self reads 300 page books on international relations and philosophy. I buy and have so many books but cannot bear to get rid of any of them!
wow so guilty of this!! I really try to get into Rosseau and Camus but honestly I´m not that kind of reader!
Why don't you donate them to your local public library? You can still borrow them if you really want to read them in the future!
I think it is very easy to convince yourself to buy it instead of going to a library, because going to a library is a bigger effort and commitment. You think there is a higher chance of you reading it if you have it :) I did that a lot too :)
Also guilty +purplepoppy07- but I do read them. However there are lots of them. One thing I do is box up all the books I definitely know I'm never going to read, and bring them to the local library. I get a tax credit (donation in kind) for the books they decide to put into the system, and the rest goes to a book sate that supports the library. Last year, I got $50. I live in Canada. It may not be a thing where you are. However, depending on the books, you can donate them to a hospital, or a cancer center, even a shelter or a prison. I've also posted a list of really great books my real self was never going to read, and ended up giving them to friends. I'm a lot more mindful in my book purchases now. Still buy some, a lot less, and I actually read more now that my bookshelves are rid of my fantasy self books.
Great suggestion Sonia! donating them to your local library will keep the burden off of you, put keep the books available to read should you still want to. I also have a well-read fantasy self. The good part about the decluttering process for me was once I started I couldn't stop! It felt so relieving, I thought "Well, what else can I get rid of?!" excitedly. I personally sold my books for money at a local book store, but I did make $40 more than I was expecting rather than donating it! I have donated a lot of clothes, and sold the really good more niche items on eBay for money as well. Made some decent money there too!
Wow!what a revolutionary concept..my mind is completely blown right now..thank you for sharing! Also..the scary thought of parting with part of your fantasy self can also scare you so much you acctually start doing the activity! So much to think about right now...
I see Fantasy me not decluttering anything and moving into a castle with tons of storage.
Haha yep. Whenever Real Allison goes on Zillow to look at houses, Fantasy Allison manages to set the search parameters to $10 million requiring a tennis court and detached guest house (Fantasy Allison also plays tennis).
Lol... love this comment!
This is the 3rd video I've watched about a fantasy self. I can't believe I hadn't heard of it before. Things make much more sense since I've started learning about it.
oh lord i'm living a LIE!!! hahahah this is so interesting. thanks for the video this gave me a very different perspective.
I had an epiphany when I saw this title and listened to your story. It gave such a different perspective on the things I own. Never knew why I collected certain things. I have tons of lingerie never wear. I bought them because they were so beautiful. Thanks for making this video. I'll be thinking about this subject for days.
Oh my goodness thank you for giving this a name. Without realising I have been decluttering my fantasy self for a few years now. The baker, preserve maker, clothes making, veggie growing fantasy self. Now that I have a name for it I can see so many other things in my life that I can now cull, and actually embrace who I really am without feeling less. Thanks Allison.
I just have to say...... I am so inspired to rummage though my house and rethink some of the items i have held onto! I have been slowly trying to adapt to a more minimalist way of living. And the moment you mentioned the high heels, my eyes immediately darted over to the MANY boxes of shoes stacked up on my closet floor . I love this Allison. Thanks for sparking my brain to look at these things in a different light.
Thank you so much for introducing me to my fantasy self. This makes so much, so clear to me about my self. Wow!
that sweater is BEAUTIFUL. love your classy, elegant style
Thank you!
My fantasy self has huge fancy parties where I need every kind of serving platter, glasses etc my whole spare bedroom closet is full of extra serving pieces. Oh my gosh I havent had a party in years!
Love this video! I had no idea that this was an actual thing but it's so true. I got home from backpacking last year and had a major sort out of my wardrobe, and by major sort out I mean packed away all the clothes that don't fit me into a suitcase (or two) with the intention of losing weight and fitting into them again. Well, it's one year on and I haven't lost weight and even if I did I doubt I would wear the clothes that I packed up a year ago (that haven't actually fit me in several years.) I feel like I need to be ruthless and get rid of stuff!
This topic really resonated with me, not in terms of possessions, but more so the me I thought I would be with my "fantasy life". In reality, I have a really complicated family dynamic. Without being specific, I am struggling to live my real~life life with joy, forgiveness, and grace. I want and need to let go of the life that isn't really where I am now, and move forward with acceptance and hope❤️
I came over from the Messy Minimalist's channel. She mentioned your video. Ugh, I have several things coming to mind right now. Time to fill up the car and head to the donation center!! haha! Thanks for the motivation!
I love how authentic you were in this video with this topic! I think we could all use a reality check when it comes to catering to our fantasy life versus real life! Loved this video, it inspired me to do some more decluttering!!
Thank your for gently attacking me with this video Lolol I needed it!
Wow! I have tons of stuff that are for 'if I ever...'. Thank you for pointing out that getting rid of a physical item does not mean getting rid of the dream/desire. I've been trying to purge and live more minimally, this is going to help so much!
This concept is sooo real! I thought it was just me but as I'm scrolling through the comments it looks like we all have similar versions of our fantasy selves... Fantasy girl is apparently playing all of us and taking our money lol 😂
haha right! the money I have spent on this trick!
I had never heard of this before but the second I saw the title of this video I knew exactly what your were talking about. I do this! I am planning a big purge of my entire wardrobe tomorrow so I'm so glad I saw this today!
Yesterday I was decluttering my clothing rack while watching one of your decluttering videos, so this will come in handy as well. :)
And yes, of course I have a fantasy self... My fantasy self is enjoying summer to the fullest, going out with friends, going to the beach (although there aren't any beaches here in Austria), travelling to other countries, but my actual self doesn't like hot weather, is an introvert that rarely goes out, doesn't like to be in the water in front of many people and only made it to Vienna once this year. My actual self embraces fall colours and fancies snowy days in with her family and friends. You got me thinking, I should reconsider and declutter my fantasy self. :)
One of the best videos that I've seen in a while! Is this real me or fantasy me is an amazing way to look at things. Can you link the article you read about it? So fascinating
YES! Thank you for this! I never knew there was a name for it. Which fits quite well by the way, and I think you explained it perfectly. You're not necessarily wiping out that "goal/dream" just being realistic about it. I've slowly been getting rid of these fantasy self indulgences over the past few years. I realized I'd much rather have space and stick to a few classic options, rather than have a variety of options for "just in case" scenarios.
I'd never heard of this concept before but omg it's so real. great video!
Fantasy me is literally why I own a yoga mat. Called out so fast.
As soon as you mentioned heels, I was like, "Oh yeah, that's me."
Before moving to NYC I drove everywhere. So I wore heels and had big handbags. Now that I walk everywhere I wear comfortable shoes and use smaller handbags. The city changes you.
LOL! I've never heard this concept before, but it's so true! My fantasy self thinks she can sew, and imagines herself putting together amazing scrapbooks of her travels. But the reality is my sewing machine gathers dust because I can't sew a straight line and always tangle my bobbin, and the last time I made a "scrapbook" it was uploading photos to Shutterfly 4 years ago with a free book coupon code, and even that seemed like too much effort.
Allison, this video was SO GOOD! I was totally laughing when you came clean about the sweater for sailing. I'm sure I have pieces like that and now I'm going to go through my wardrobe to get rid of them! You also have inspired me to let go of more heels! I just never wear them anymore. Even for events where I could wear them, I usually opt for flats now because I don't want to be in pain the whole time. So THANK YOU for filming this!
Found this video after searching for some on minimalism and just want to say THANK YOU! I’m trying improve myself and I definitely live (and shop!) for my fantasy self. As I declutter I’m going to start asking myself “who owns this, me or fantasy me?” Some of it is definitely a grey area though - I’m no yogi but the few times I do yoga I’m very glad to have a mat! I’m in my late 20s so it’s probably a good time to let “fantasy me” go.
I had never heard of this before but it makes complete sense and definitely a key on the journey of decluttering, thank you!!
I just wanted to update you that I absolutely loved this video, it was a new concept for me the idea of a fantasy self in respect to minimalism. I live on a boat and and constantly working to become more of a minimalist, partly out of necessity, but also because I genuinely want to live a conscious and deliberate life. Anyway, a day after watching your video I went through my shoes and found a few moldy pairs (oh boat life), one of the pairs I forgot I owned which definitely means I don't need to own them, there were also a few other pairs that I could have easily cleaned up but I thought about the idea of my fantasy self(who loves heels), and kept only the shoes I will really wear. Thanks again for sharing this video!
Ugh this is ME! Came here from Rachel at Messy Minimalist & this information is SO SPOT-ON & important to moving forward in decluttering. I will definitely be checking out more of your videos! I gave this one a thumbs up!
I've never heard of this idea before! My fantasy self definitely wears a lot more lipstick than real me. It's so pretty and colorful... and I NEVER wear it.
Lol lol
Yay I'm so excited your transitioning to more minimalism and simple living! My blog is also an aspiring minimalist:) love that you've got great ideas! I've been following your channel for a few years now and am happy you're changing things up!
Oh my...I never thought about this concept as "fantasy self", but it makes so much sense! Thank you for this video ☺
omg, i've been decluttering my stuff over a year now, and wow, i really do need to declutter my fantasy-selves really. i think this was why i couldn't clear mind even after decluttering most of my stuff. decluttering one's fantasy-self could be another phrase for 'accepting oneself', but much BETTER.
LOL! I LOVE that I am not the only person who has these kind of thoughts. Thank you for making this video because it definitely opened my eyes.
My fantasy self is in skinny jeans, really cute booties and this beautiful flowy top...
Reality- jeans, sneakers and a hoodie!
thank you for this. it is hard not to get lost in the rabbit role of finding the perfect this and that and curating an image....this really helped take away a lot of guilt and pressure for me!!
Awesome video! Definitely something to think about :) I do have a hard time letting go of my fantasy self. I'll journal about it today and see what my brain comes up with.
This is a great video! As a self identified minimalist, I'd never heard of this topic, but its very helpful. Thank you!
Going back and watching your old videos... This really hit home! I live in Southern California and I have this furry vest I bought at Anthropologie years ago. Never worn! But my fantasy self keeps thinking one day when I find myself in heavy snow I'll wear it 😅
This is such an interesting topic! I realized long ago that my fantasy self is a great film-maker travelling around the world, but thankfully I don't splurge on fancy camera equipment or an executive class airplane ticket because I don't have the money to do so. But now that I think of it, my fantasy self also reads heavy fiction or classic books that real me don't have enough interest in reading them after buying them. I kept thinking that I'm going to read those books but it's been awhile since I have an interest to read them.
I know this video is already 3 years old and I'm very late to the comment section.. But I just wanted to say Thank you!! You explained the fantasy self concept so well, and this is something I have been struggling with a lot lately as I've been decluttering. My fantasy self apparently reads alll the books, does allll the crafts, and is a hardcore dvd and cd collector 😅 - whereas in reality I probably only use 10-20% of those items nowadays! Thank you, your video helped me understand the disconnect in my brain a bit betrer and I'm now going to attack my stuff with renewed vengeance 😊.
I think this happens with age... you become more aware, and just want to keep things simple. I guess in the end it’s becoming the “ real you “ 🙂 Interesting video!
Perfect as usual, I have been hanging onto every word. This is great stuff for me. Anyway, loved you're little boat story. That said it all for me, I'm like Ok gotcha, now gotta get busy. But like a comment below said that this is the reason she can't get rid of anything in the first place. I am so glad I found this channel. Another thing that many are probably not as bad with anymore as I am is the stuff you are either gonna fix someday or repurpose. I hate even letting myself think that. I have tools in the garage, well part of a tool or a strange looking screwy thing that I don't even know what it is or anything and now dozens of millions of this kinda thing is in the garage for that time that it would suck if you found what it went to or what you would need it for. That is horrible for me and this fantasy self is too now I guess. I cant' keep up with all the good stuff you have advised us of. Eye openers, even if it makes perfect sense it doesn't help us til we can do it and I feel you have given me the tools and steps needed.
I really loved this video Allison! I am familiar with the concept of "fantasy self" or as I call it "ideal me" and I think it can be positive in terms of goal setting and mind set but I never connected it to decluttering! I definitely have had moments where I buy for my fantasy self, and have gotten rid of items because of it. However, I do have a little process of getting rid of my fantasy self items, I usually try to do what I intended to do with it when I bought it, ex. going to yoga at 6 am all week and then deciding if I can still keep it in my life as long as I'm using it to better myself. But in the end. it just always feels better to get rid of stuff you don't use, and you'll likely forget about it once it's gone. Thanks for this vid! :)
I love this topic (minimalism/simplifying). I vote to keep these coming as long as it's an interest of yours! :)
I totally went through this phase. I blame instagram and pinterest haha. I literally bought so many heels and blazers when going through the paris chic phase and also got caught up buying different holiday outfits....the truth is when I'm on holiday I like zero fuss. I remember I always ended up wearing the cheap tube dresses that I bought locally instead of what I packed...it's crazy.
This topic has fueled my minimalism journey for a couple years but now it has a name! Excellent!
Hope your speak about this again : )
Lmao!!! You totally described me! I had no clue! I just thought, I was resourceful lately I’ve been question am I a hoarder but, your teaching sounds more like me of how I rationalize about certain items lol....I’m super shocked and soo enlightened!!! My next is that the moment I depart with certain items......something will come-up for me to have kept it and I’m going to be upset that I didn’t keep....uuugh.....I’m gonna soul search because I really do want to declutter of things of I don’t use at all and my mind🙏🏽Thank you - I loved this video!
Oh. My. God. This video is SO good!!!!! Thank you for this!!!!!!!
Loved this and my fantasy self lives a far more glamorous lifestyle than I do. She loves things like faux fur, leather pants and glitter, while the real me doesn't have anywhere to wear it. So happy I'm not the only one. Thanks for sharing. Love your channel! :)
HaveLouisWillTravel That sounds like me! I always love trying on blingy clothing or weird clothing, but I wouldn't have anywhere to where it!
Totally agree! I used to buy extravagant clothing as well! it is so weird. and it took me a long time to realize, I don't like and wear those things... :)
haha! yeah I love to dress fashionable but if it doesn't feel comfortable or isn't in my easy outfit go-tos, there's no point in buying it because I don't wear anything I don't know how to, or feel comfy in.
OMG-I just recv'd a faux fur from Zara online & just asked for the return label today☺WTF, I am not wearing this coat even though it is gorgeous! Thanks for the laugh.♥
YES! This is what I've discovered. I like to be comfortable but cute. If it is fussy--I never grab it. Like I notice all the silk blouses sit there because I want cotton even when I go out☺ Fantasy me would have on the silk top with the faux fur I just returned! LOL
Love this look into deeper aspects of minimalism! Please continue to share these discoveries and personal insights with us 🤗 always a breath of fresh air
I have the same fantasy sweater - both in white and black! Stacks of heels in every color. Never been worn. Ever. Thanks for this.
I love this! It’s what I needed to hear and honestly appreciate it way more than I could ever explain. I’ve never heard of this but it makes so much sense. My fantasy self is a little family woman, wife, mother, home owner of a little cottage that has huge closets and this masterful kitchen with ever coffee cup available. Hahaha. Thanks for this!!
I'm so glad you made a video on this topic! I had no idea this kind of behavior had a name. It's definitely going to make me think more critically about why I buy/hold on to certain items!
I’ve never thought about it this way.. I totally do this with a couple items!! This was exactly what I needed to get off the plateau I’ve been on the past couple weeks 🙏
This is such an eye opener! Fantasy me buy goeuro us Bohemian clothes that are flowy but never actually fit my natural curves and then never wear them haha! And all those art supplies but om determined to actually use them!
This makes so much sense to me!! I'm 65 years old, I think it's time I got real with myself!
See this is so hard at the same time. Because I keep stuff, with my fantasy self in mind. Then I get pissed off with the clutter and get rid of it, yoga mat for example then I'll find myself a few weeks later at yoga or something regretting getting rid of my mat.
Just the other day, I was telling my mom that I have a shopping alter ego! My mom thought I was so weird, lol! I'm glad I'm not alone. I always see the cutest tanks and other super summery clothes, when I actually rarely wear them because the climate is fairly cool and rainy most of the year! I also really enjoy trying on unique and flashy clothing in the dressing room, but I dress business casual or casual most of the time. Whenever I go shopping, I have to ask myself if I really have a purpose for something or if it will just look pretty in my closet!
This is so interesting! I never knew a fantasy self was an actual thing but now you've explained it I think I can recognise better what is just my fantasy self vs an actual aspiration I'm working on. Thanks for the video!
This is SO me! My fantasy self is a super tidy minimalist ha ha! Thanks for helping me understand myself, my shopping habits and my clutter better! Fantasy self also keeps buying kitchen gear, clothes, jewelry. Looks like I have multiple fantasy selVES! This concept will help me declutter for real... next week ;-)
Love this. I had never heard of this before. I was buying shoes yesterday to wear to an outdoor wedding fantasy me tried on all the heels but knew deep down I needed the flats. The one crazy thing I have been holding on to (fantasy me) has been moving around and never used 50+ votive cups to be used for a party or wedding three moves later still have them. Thanks for this video
Hi! I have been interested in minimalism and intentional living for a long time, I've decluttered my physical and digital space... yet this is the first video ever where I have found some form of mental decluttering and I'm very glad I did. Thank you for posting this fascinating video. I hope you can delve into this even more! =)
Wow, this was a fantastic video! And the topic is fascinating. I tend to buy lots of art to hang on walls, whether it's a print of a Klimt painting, a concert poster or cool stuff ripped out of oversized magazines. The thing is...I'm a minimalist! In my lifestyle and also aesthetically. I have been a practicing minimalist for over a decade and I really like my clean white walls. But I really really love all kinds of art! I think my fantasy self is a rabid art collector that imagines she will have tons of extra walls to hang all this fabulous art. In reality, most of my walls are white and all my art is in my closet :)
i have loved your videos since day one Allison! It is youtubers like you who inspired me to make my own channel :) Thanks so much for sharing your ideas! xo
I came from the messy minimalist channel, where I came to know about this vdo of yours. Oh boy... What a wonderful concept. Eagerly waiting to de clutter my hoarding, thanks to my fantasy self. Thank you sooo much.
You totally crack me up! I love how down to earth you are and your ideas for minimalism are inspiring... definitely subscribing and putting them to use 😊
Thank you for this!! I almost bought a dress at Old Navy the other day before I realized that it was just something that Fantasy Erin would wear. What a helpful concept!
First minimalist vid with something new for a while. Loved it. :)
I think you just saved me time and money for the therapy I didn’t know I needed. Thank you💡. Jessica Braun sent me here.
my fantasy self is an avid crafter and DIY junkie. HAHAHA
My fantasy self is an avid painter, an actual witch IRL (tarot decks, crystals, reiki certification, etc.), and recently... a minimalist. I’m trying really hard do follow through with that last one!
Thank you so much for this video ! This is what was missing for me to start understanding why I'm having so much of a hard time decluttering !! This will give me the extra push I needed !!
I did the same thing with hills!!! My husband does it with his Harley's .....yes plural . He has not rode in years but still holds on to two bikes and all the stuff that goes with them!