Fighting my way from PEASANT to KNIGHT OF THE REALM!!

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  • Опубліковано 25 гру 2024

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  • @GalaxyHighMarshal
    @GalaxyHighMarshal 2 місяці тому +108

    Hi Half Sword Games VFX dev here! Thank you for playing our game! greets!

  • @Uk.government-j2q
    @Uk.government-j2q 2 місяці тому +704

    “London simulator” is wild

  • @Dfarrey
    @Dfarrey 2 місяці тому +317

    This is simultaneously the best and worst combat I've ever seen.

    • @djchappell1726
      @djchappell1726 2 місяці тому +12

      The total lack of martial understanding swings wildly between entertaining and scarringly painful! 🤣😖

    • @stevebrown5241
      @stevebrown5241 2 місяці тому +9

      And RCE's comments....absolutely loosing it every 2 minutes with laughter. I think this is one of my favorite videos. :)

    • @QueenMonny
      @QueenMonny 2 місяці тому +1

      ​@@stevebrown5241 Same. Funniest video I've seen in ages.

  • @sirscooty2330
    @sirscooty2330 2 місяці тому +42

    That’s exactly how I imagined fights in London go “Eat my knife, eat my knife. Oh dear, I’ve died”

  • @asaturner4097
    @asaturner4097 2 місяці тому +155

    How was there not a "what did he say?" Gif when he said "we're all stuck in each other "?

  • @LuxFerre4242
    @LuxFerre4242 2 місяці тому +49

    22:24 "How are we meant to hurt each other? We got so much armour on." The answer is the name of the game: half swording.

    • @Connor-p6k
      @Connor-p6k 2 місяці тому +2

      He actually right nice!

  • @python2400
    @python2400 2 місяці тому +11

    18:03 "We're all, like, in each other"
    THAT is the WHAT DID HE SAYYYY moment😂😂😂😂

  • @LearnToRace
    @LearnToRace 2 місяці тому +15

    This game is comedy gold 2:59 giving the guy a smooch killed me

  • @AaronLyNxAI
    @AaronLyNxAI 2 місяці тому +7

    The giant pliers are smiths tongs, for blacksmithing. They have a few names but that's the one I know them by. Got a few pairs myself for when I work on knives

  • @J.I.R.A
    @J.I.R.A 2 місяці тому +25

    Omg yes, mate! Don't get much time to play nowadays, so this game is the only one I've been playing whenever I have a few minutes. Turn on the PC, launch it, have a few laughs, and turn it off. Not having to worry about progress, connection, or nothing other than laughing has been a wonderful experience.

  • @jaymay7957
    @jaymay7957 2 місяці тому +8

    1:45 how the vast majority of people fight hahah just swinging wildly. Hilarious

  • @rabidbadger5260
    @rabidbadger5260 2 місяці тому +7

    'London simulator' had me creased!
    11/10 - -totally accurate battle commentary.

  • @BAKERSMAN
    @BAKERSMAN 2 місяці тому +60

    FYI that tiny shield is known as a buckler, usually paired with a one-handed sword🤓😂

    • @the98themperoroftheholybri33
      @the98themperoroftheholybri33 2 місяці тому +10

      And the weird spear is a billhook, the AK47 of the medieval world, because it was also a farming tool so everyone had easy access to them

    • @of_being
      @of_being 2 місяці тому +6

      I would not recommend tilling your soil with an AK. It’s effective, but expensive.

    • @Plystire
      @Plystire 2 місяці тому +1

      @@of_being Not to mention the lead content your crops would end up having

    • @Digibo
      @Digibo 2 місяці тому +1

      I've yet to see a shield paired with a two-handed sword 😅

    • @LuxFerre4242
      @LuxFerre4242 2 місяці тому +5

      @Digibo I've seen (and used) a two-handed sword with a shield at my old HEMA club. It's not great but better than a kick in the teeth.

  • @matthewtalbot-paine7977
    @matthewtalbot-paine7977 2 місяці тому +29

    Calling a candle stick a coat rack? That's a paddling.

  • @freddycalabrese319
    @freddycalabrese319 2 місяці тому +5

    Take a shot every time Matt says something like "we do not lose fights in Australia" or "I'm quite good at single combat" before immediately dying

  • @Mets2015WorldSeries
    @Mets2015WorldSeries 2 місяці тому +9

    13:23 I think you’ll be upset to hear that the shield emblem you have is that of France…

  • @vironx22
    @vironx22 2 місяці тому +93

    Day 59 of asking Matt to play what he wants to play. Because we will enjoy it anyway :)

    • @JoshSteiner14
      @JoshSteiner14 2 місяці тому +9

      The only one of these that’s okay

    • @saadsaad-g4e
      @saadsaad-g4e 2 місяці тому +7

      Waiting for 10 more days to make it efficient. I hope Matt is hoping the same to make it efficient.

    • @britishshock
      @britishshock 2 місяці тому +1

      Theses are always the best games. Especially when they're not.

    • @abcdefgcdefg5178
      @abcdefgcdefg5178 2 місяці тому +1

      Best comment in a while

    • @GETCHOOSUM
      @GETCHOOSUM 2 місяці тому +1

      This is the way

  • @JoJoGaminG36
    @JoJoGaminG36 2 місяці тому +6

    I finally did it, I started to study Civil Engineering! Thanks for Matt that made this field of Work interesting for me over the years. You really made the decision easy for me.

  • @TTIOttio
    @TTIOttio 2 місяці тому +25

    Drinking game: take a drink every time Matt says the same thing twice in a row :p

    • @Coolchris158
      @Coolchris158 2 місяці тому +1

      I’ve been saying that for months 😂

    • @TTIOttio
      @TTIOttio 2 місяці тому

      @@Coolchris158 I didn't notice it till this video!
      No idea how I'm so bad at noticing things... xD

    • @saltyjr42
      @saltyjr42 2 місяці тому +2

      (dies within two minutes)

    • @jimmymcgoochie5363
      @jimmymcgoochie5363 2 місяці тому +3

      Please, for the sake of your liver, DO NOT TRY THIS

    • @robwitka
      @robwitka 2 місяці тому

      Classic Jacob Two-Two

  • @davidjagt9627
    @davidjagt9627 2 місяці тому +2

    "Peace, Love, and Cold-blooded Murder" is definitely a way to end a video

  • @RexRussia88
    @RexRussia88 2 місяці тому +6

    Use the shift key with short bursts/swings, the leading arm you swing with it always going to position the corresponding foot to match (that’s why you get off balance) double clicking releases stuck weapons, don’t swing blade back and forth causes your swing to not have momentum, momentum dictates how much damage you do

    • @phoenixta8168
      @phoenixta8168 2 місяці тому

      is what he is playing the demo or the actual game, and if its the game, where can I find it? Thank you!

  • @Juniper_Rose
    @Juniper_Rose 2 місяці тому +1

    "he's got so much armor! how are we gonna get through!?" - matt, wielding the "get through the armor" weapon, the morningstar

  • @officialnucky
    @officialnucky 2 місяці тому +2

    6:05 Matt got the finger puppet weapon

  • @JojenPaste
    @JojenPaste 2 місяці тому +1

    So excited to see you play this. My buddy and I got addicted to this demo for like 2 weeks straight. This is all we played. It’s so surprisingly fun.

  • @antwauneharris6663
    @antwauneharris6663 Місяць тому

    0:25 the shade is real 😂😂😂😂

  • @graygam
    @graygam 2 місяці тому

    This game is actually pretty interesting, a lot of the design and art is historically accurate. They are kind of mixing the 14th and 15th centuries together, such as I saw a depiction of the Black Prince wearing a sallet even though they wouldn’t exist for approximately another 40 years after his death. Other than little things like that its really cool seeing something so historically accurate

  • @ОнекдОт
    @ОнекдОт Місяць тому

    0:25 can’t even afford hair😂😂😂

  • @JTHarleyD
    @JTHarleyD 2 місяці тому +1

    This was so hilarious. Been howling and crying for more than half the video 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @jormunganir3517
    @jormunganir3517 2 місяці тому

    12:44
    That's a billhook. A pretty nasty weapon often used to dismount cavalry. Overall just a pretty decent polearm if you ask me.

  • @szilagyilev
    @szilagyilev 2 місяці тому +2

    mylord, mylord, the boosh counter... it overruneth!

  • @jcbw95
    @jcbw95 Місяць тому

    I understand this is an older video but this video made me laugh out loud best video on UA-cam the game plus commentary are elite.

  • @ghriszlybare2547
    @ghriszlybare2547 2 місяці тому

    I swear i was thinking of that scene in gladiator and zoning out a bit and then you say the line! "Are you not entertained?" Sometimes i wonder if were all connected

  • @_Kovayne
    @_Kovayne 2 місяці тому

    i've never laughed this hard at a gaming video before but this game is hilarious

  • @leepatterson5710
    @leepatterson5710 2 місяці тому

    Finally something that is a clicker game where Matt is like “fat stonks” every 5 seconds or a game where he commits genocide for the upteenth time.
    Loved the video.

  • @adynwhitworth3842
    @adynwhitworth3842 2 місяці тому

    BRO YOURE LIKE MY FAVORITE UA-camR AND NOW YOURE PLAYING ONE OF MY FAVORITE GAMES? HELL YEA

  • @abcdefgcdefg5178
    @abcdefgcdefg5178 2 місяці тому +1

    Pretty sure I'm stealing that pic of matt on the gladiator and hanging on my wall 😂

  • @alepaz1099
    @alepaz1099 2 місяці тому

    "We all started with knives, this is London simulator" 😬
    😂😂

  • @sidneyvandykeii3169
    @sidneyvandykeii3169 2 місяці тому

    This is the Goat Simulator of medieval fighting.

  • @crapparc
    @crapparc 2 місяці тому +5

    The idiom is Rags to Riches, Matt. Unless that guy is so poor it's just the one rag.

  • @PlatinumGaming67
    @PlatinumGaming67 2 місяці тому +2

    11:06 That was actually a really good attack

  • @R-es5pg
    @R-es5pg 2 місяці тому +1

    As someone who works with architects and engineers nearly everyday, your dislike for them is 100% justifiable

  • @guyhale4941
    @guyhale4941 2 місяці тому +1

    This was hilarious. Big laughs with this one.

  • @borbarad2.0
    @borbarad2.0 28 днів тому

    The weapon at 12:50 is a Voulge a forefather of the Halberd.

  • @kanesaunders4000
    @kanesaunders4000 Місяць тому

    This kinda reminds me of “swords and sandals” from school days 😂

  • @olivialambert4124
    @olivialambert4124 2 місяці тому +3

    The irony of "Brave Stand" being nothing but Matt running away.

    • @OctyabrAprelya
      @OctyabrAprelya 2 місяці тому

      Need to see SovietWomble playing thisXD

  • @The22ndDoctor
    @The22ndDoctor 2 місяці тому

    The great philosopher Tyson once said "Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face"

  • @hasangarmarudi2178
    @hasangarmarudi2178 2 місяці тому +1

    15:08 actually sick reposte

  • @zenzej
    @zenzej 2 місяці тому +1

    "I'm trying to not have mercy on You, Shut Up!" - this got me hard :D

  • @meatharbor
    @meatharbor 2 місяці тому

    While certainly manuscript-accurate, the one-handed bloke attack is commonly thought to be incapable of Ending Him Rightly™.

  • @DanielTracey-kr9ep
    @DanielTracey-kr9ep 2 місяці тому

    This is one of the best things Ive ever watched, kudos RCE

  • @IDESTROYER236
    @IDESTROYER236 2 місяці тому

    10:51
    "Mods, kill him with hammers."

  • @Angelsilhouette
    @Angelsilhouette 2 місяці тому +3

    12:44 It's a Bill Hook.

    • @raznaak
      @raznaak 2 місяці тому +1

      Aww, I wanted to say it.

    • @FerrumAnulum
      @FerrumAnulum 2 місяці тому +1

      Came here to say the same thing

  • @erictorres9906
    @erictorres9906 2 місяці тому +4

    I'm not used to wielding something like this - THAT's what SHE said!!

  • @lordsqueak
    @lordsqueak 2 місяці тому

    @1:00 ish
    "Mom! , why are the skinheads fighting?"

  • @jonogrimmer6013
    @jonogrimmer6013 2 місяці тому +1

    I nearly died watching this! 😆

  • @AppleShrapnel
    @AppleShrapnel 2 місяці тому

    Something I'm hoping for in a future update is a slo-mo toggle. Would be so fun for making a precision strike around an enemy's guard or lining up a thrust or chop with their head. >:3c

  • @ithoughtshewas18
    @ithoughtshewas18 2 місяці тому +1

    To paraphrase someone - We are the lowest of low...we can't even find a decent culture to be colonised by 😂 that was what I was half expecting when Matt said We're the lowest of the low 🤣

  • @salionshatterstar
    @salionshatterstar 2 місяці тому

    Oh my goodness. I can't recall when last I laughed so hard.

  • @shannecy9801
    @shannecy9801 2 місяці тому

    7:19 thats a buckler shield used to parry

  • @steelratgoestogym
    @steelratgoestogym 2 місяці тому

    This one was absolutely hilarious, LMAO 😂

  • @tdahl42
    @tdahl42 2 місяці тому

    RCE turning this game into Peter Garrett Dancing Simulator. (Lead singer of Aussie band Midnight Oil)

    • @QueenMonny
      @QueenMonny 2 місяці тому +1

      🤣. Only a sufficiently old enough Australian (or someone into... unusual music) would understand this reference. But it's spot on.

  • @elmadicine
    @elmadicine 2 місяці тому

    bunch of blokes shuffling around in a corner with knives
    "London simulator" 💀💀💀

  • @FlatAntler
    @FlatAntler 2 місяці тому

    I think this RCE's funniest video of all time!

  • @JonBonCat
    @JonBonCat 2 місяці тому

    @12:41 a spear is a type of pole arm. What you were wielding is also a pole arm, and it's called a glaive.
    Much love to you and yours.
    /Jon Bon

    • @JonBonCat
      @JonBonCat 2 місяці тому

      Turns out it's a billhook.

  • @hasenkuschel8328
    @hasenkuschel8328 2 місяці тому

    There is a demo of this game too. You begin with nothing and have to find weapons and armor in an rouqe like setting. And their is blood too!😊
    Some bosses are so powerfull🥲

  • @minkster5054
    @minkster5054 2 місяці тому

    Its always the engineers that like the group stuff.

  • @theUglyGypsy
    @theUglyGypsy 2 місяці тому

    Minneapolis simulator would be a 10 year old stealing your Kia.

  • @chrisbatherton
    @chrisbatherton Місяць тому

    love this thank you!!

  • @VinayVarsani
    @VinayVarsani 2 місяці тому

    One of your best videos in s while Matt 😂😂

  • @Bagline
    @Bagline 2 місяці тому +1

    Jeff Bezos fighting simulator.

  • @ianemoon5152
    @ianemoon5152 2 місяці тому

    May i recommend "we who are about to die" its similar like this but with gladiators

  • @corey1605
    @corey1605 2 місяці тому +1

    This was hilarious!!!

  • @minsin21
    @minsin21 2 місяці тому

    14:25 that looks more like a Shiny Vader

  • @spaceman1643
    @spaceman1643 2 місяці тому

    the new 'thats what she said' clip got me

  • @cnikkor
    @cnikkor 2 місяці тому +14

    There is a typo in the title. "KINGHT"

    • @RealCivilEngineerGaming
      @RealCivilEngineerGaming  2 місяці тому +8

      Oops, architect moment!

    • @cnikkor
      @cnikkor 2 місяці тому

      @@RealCivilEngineerGaming happens to the best of us apparently

    • @NoodleKeeper
      @NoodleKeeper 2 місяці тому +4

      @@RealCivilEngineerGaming Should've just left it. It fits with the goofy vibe of this game.

    • @snodog00
      @snodog00 2 місяці тому +1

      ​@@RealCivilEngineerGaming You...um... you seem to have those a lot.

    • @OakleyWaltman
      @OakleyWaltman 2 місяці тому

      I thought it was just a Monty Python reference lmao

  • @dondiezel
    @dondiezel Місяць тому

    I feel like this is how RCE would fight in real life.

  • @Daniel-lc5dk
    @Daniel-lc5dk Місяць тому

    TABS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!❤

  • @willnogood
    @willnogood 2 місяці тому

    Playtime is over boys, I'm going to take the cookies out of the oven lol

  • @JMan0160
    @JMan0160 2 місяці тому

    17:48 he got VIOLATED

    • @QueenMonny
      @QueenMonny 2 місяці тому

      Your time stamp is a second too late.

  • @Dog_is_god21
    @Dog_is_god21 Місяць тому

    i love how they just kept hitting the dead guys

  • @ameknight8875
    @ameknight8875 2 місяці тому

    Fallout: London looks amazing so far!

  • @aulvinduergard9952
    @aulvinduergard9952 2 місяці тому

    I believe that 'paddle' was what medieval laundry women used to clean clothes. Yes, they'd literally beat the stains out.

    • @Nick-hi9gx
      @Nick-hi9gx 2 місяці тому

      No it is for putting loaves of bread in the stone oven, taking them out again. Same thing as the big ones used for pizzas, just bread-sized.

  • @Infernoblade1010
    @Infernoblade1010 2 місяці тому

    Taking a page from the treatise of Sir Flails Wildly

  • @iXpertYK
    @iXpertYK 2 місяці тому

    I can watch this video all day long..so funny

  • @Apocalypse33
    @Apocalypse33 2 місяці тому +1

    This was hilarious 😂

  • @jb.7314
    @jb.7314 2 місяці тому

    Its somehow quiet disgusting to see the kind of the game about gladiator fighting and somehow amazingly funny to hear your commentary

  • @jamesmarkham9464
    @jamesmarkham9464 2 місяці тому

    Ahh I just laughed soo hard I cried 😂 amazing job Matt lol

  • @JinxsyYT
    @JinxsyYT 2 місяці тому

    This game gives me the same feeling as hitting someone in a dream 😅

  • @scottvisakowitz6326
    @scottvisakowitz6326 2 місяці тому

    I havent laughed this much in a while

  • @cactus.goblin
    @cactus.goblin 2 місяці тому

    I am literally crying with laugher omg

  • @SgtBucky26
    @SgtBucky26 2 місяці тому

    You should do a bridge review on archaludon. It's a pokemon and a bridge

  • @Friariah
    @Friariah 2 місяці тому

    The tiny shield is called a buckler.

  • @hjge1012
    @hjge1012 2 місяці тому

    So this is what real engineering looks like.

  • @laneledford7383
    @laneledford7383 2 місяці тому

    I will never get tired of the architect hate. It makes me smile every time. 😂

  • @harrisong3386
    @harrisong3386 2 місяці тому

    At the 4:30 mark that guy beating his meat while beating you with pliers 😂 his hand placement was definitely sus

  • @fruitfulconnoisseur
    @fruitfulconnoisseur 2 місяці тому

    The guy with the hat rack had slow swings so it's a matter of timing with the stool

  • @mikeroshier6560
    @mikeroshier6560 2 місяці тому +2

    Omg swords and sandals next gen update

  • @quindecim577
    @quindecim577 2 місяці тому

    Greatly reminds of exanima's arena. It's alot more wacky. Lol.

  • @stuartlanqvist2390
    @stuartlanqvist2390 2 місяці тому

    Absolutely hilarious!

  • @lenartd2
    @lenartd2 2 місяці тому

    was laughing so hard!