Brands Won't Leave Me Alone

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  • Опубліковано 13 лип 2024
  • Check out SimpliSafe’s holiday sale by visiting simplisafe.com/jarvis. Get 40% off their award-winning home security that keeps your home safe around the clock plus a free HD camera! It’s really reliable, easy to use, and there are no contracts.
    --
    Somebody come get these brands
    ANTI-SOCIAL MEDIA (wakeup sheeple)
    ► / jarvis
    ► / jarvis
    LISTEN TO MY PODCAST
    ► / sadboyzpod
    ► sadboyzpod.com/spotify
    ► sadboyzpod.com/itunes
    OTHER CHANNEL
    ► / @jarvisjohnsongold
    Subreddit ▸ / unnamedfanbase
    Merch ▸ jarvis.clothing
    -
    herbal tea by Artificial.Music / artificial-music
    Creative Commons - Attribution 3.0 Unported- CC BY 3.0
    creativecommons.org/licenses/...
  • Комедії

КОМЕНТАРІ • 5 тис.

  • @jarvis
    @jarvis  3 роки тому +3398

    Thanks again to Simplisafe for sponsoring. Check out simplisafe.com/jarvis to support the channel :)

  • @LuciaRodriguez-sn5gm
    @LuciaRodriguez-sn5gm 3 роки тому +6519

    Imagine being on the marketing team for Wendy’s and you’re tasked with writing Wattpad stories to earn your income and support your livelihood

    • @Thimble-berry
      @Thimble-berry 3 роки тому +262

      I imagine they commission freelance writers to do it. Same with the KFC dating sim.

    • @vanillabatbones
      @vanillabatbones 3 роки тому +96

      sounds like my kinda job

    • @skrtchy1445
      @skrtchy1445 3 роки тому +44

      @@vanillabatbones damn, same, someone sign me up

    • @emilye.9059
      @emilye.9059 3 роки тому +105

      Sara tapped her pencil on the dark mahogany wood of the conference table, her eyes staring straight at the white board and clock ticking second by second above it. All had been going fine and well this morning; picking up her dog's awful little present in the kitchen, racing Jaxon to school before detouring to work, having to smile at the security guard in the lobby with that awful dill pickle smell as she speed-walked by, until she got to her cubicle throwing her jacket over the back of her chair. She hadn't had any time to make a tweet yet, the creative wit of Wendy's roasts not giving her the muse she needed to face the music that morning. She'd sat down in front of her computer, ready to scour the usual morning emails, memos, and advertising strategies when her boss tapped on her on the shoulder to call everyone in for an emergency meeting. Oh no she thought, they've reviewed the time stamps, I knew this new job was too good to be true! Silently the employees filed in through the front door one by one, each unsure of what this emergency meeting was about. They eyed each other carefully, wondering who among them might know the true meaning of this change from the norm. "Good morning everybody," David announced, clapping his hands. "As I'm sure you're aware, our marketing strategy of using twitter has been going awesome lately -- " wait what? Sara thought she was the one in charge that morning. "It seems last night Joe came up with an awesome marketing strategy" Of course, Sara thought, narrowing her eyes. Perfect Joe. Ever since she'd started working at this office all he ever seemed to do was be out to one-up her. Yes, that type. The type with the ambitious air and know-it-all stare. How come he was getting the spotlight? "Asking our customers for roasts, we're all the public is talking about now! McDonalds didn't even have time to clap-back-- we have to figure out a way that'll really knock 'em out of the park to show these young teenyboppers what we're made of. Let's get creative folks! I was just thinking of creative ways to increase customer engagement when we got an idea from one of the higher ups--" Wow, that was serious stuff there, word from branches in corporate must have traveled quickly. She wondered what could possibly warrant a call or idea from another corporate level employee, not expecting for a second to hear what came out next. "Does anybody know what this w-w-aatt, wattaboard, no that wasn't it..." "Sir do you mean wattpad? The freelance website?" Joe queried. The website with freelance work that Jaxon was talking about? "Yes that's the one! They're taking off! I've just seen a brilliant tip from one of our employees! To increase customer engagement we thought we'd take advantage of some of our writers and creative types here in this office by asking anyone who was willing if they could lead a team to write some stories centered on new drinks we'll be releasing shortly! Of course whoever is up to the task should know that the company has offered to make them eligible for the company's annual bonus!" Sara's eyes flashed to Joe, her mind thinking back to Jaxon and the new shoes she'd seen him eyeing at the store. Sara left up from her chair, taking everybody's attention by storm. "I'll do it!" She shouted, Joe shooting sideline glares as David, smiling big bright and wide glanced at the rest of the team, "Great initiative Sara! Now," He turned to the white board, an excited smirk on his face, "What's your story idea about?" And with that they were off.

    • @aoi394
      @aoi394 3 роки тому +40

      That was my thought too! Like someone is getting paid to write these! Imagine someone asking what you do and you say you’re a writer and they ask what you write and you have to tell them you write for the Wendy’s wattpad account lmao.

  • @valeria-qs5ux
    @valeria-qs5ux 3 роки тому +3822

    "Wendy's wattpad account" sounds like something I'd only hear in a dream

  • @glittersoop
    @glittersoop 3 роки тому +1419

    "it is weird to be having a conversation with a beef snack..."
    --says a beef snack

  • @yoyohayli
    @yoyohayli 3 роки тому +2195

    I'm gonna start calling Wendy's marketing strategy "Chaotic Corporatism"

    • @DDub04
      @DDub04 3 роки тому +96

      “Relatable Capitalism”

    • @thineevee7345
      @thineevee7345 3 роки тому +2

      Lol

    • @-xphobia
      @-xphobia 3 роки тому +55

      "Manufactured Authenticity"

    • @jeandunham1363
      @jeandunham1363 3 роки тому +21

      I think kfc would be chaotic marketing, Wendy's is just relatable marketing

    • @-xphobia
      @-xphobia 3 роки тому +1

      @@DDub04 the term most leftys use is actually "Rainbow Capitalism"

  • @josephsanders4082
    @josephsanders4082 3 роки тому +1493

    Alt title: Jarvis is desperately trying not to flirt with these brands for 16 minutes

    • @williehornung
      @williehornung 3 роки тому +48

      2020 has us all a little lonely

    • @liainahamilton2145
      @liainahamilton2145 3 роки тому +16

      @@williehornung please touch some grass😭

    • @sunnycloudy1337
      @sunnycloudy1337 3 роки тому +24

      Alt title: everything the OP just said + ... and fails miserably

    • @acomet2509
      @acomet2509 2 роки тому +8

      He was not avoiding Zaxchys when he said he was dtf

  • @jdbonzo1
    @jdbonzo1 3 роки тому +2080

    Jarvis is in a dating sim where the only options are brands. Who will he choose? Slim jim? The other one?

    • @crummycreator5548
      @crummycreator5548 3 роки тому +156

      Probably Slim Jim. It seems like he's locked into their route since he got the DM cutscene with them. Plus it's kinda the canon route, so if you don't heavily try to go for another it will probably sort the player into the Slim Jim route. It's a good thing it's my favorite story line! Slim Jim is ✨best girl✨❤

    • @jdbonzo1
      @jdbonzo1 3 роки тому +45

      @@crummycreator5548 Agreed. Slim Jim is waifu

    • @Lucaz99
      @Lucaz99 3 роки тому +62

      Depends. He might go with KFC if it’s represented by hot husbando Colonel Sanders

    • @Amiator99
      @Amiator99 3 роки тому +10

      please someone make this

    • @smcphee8499
      @smcphee8499 3 роки тому +18

      Someone write a fanfic

  • @lemonytrash584
    @lemonytrash584 3 роки тому +3039

    Slim Jim x Jarvis Johnson x Colonel Sanders, a Wattpad fanfiction
    We need to make this happen people

    • @ceebadoobee
      @ceebadoobee 3 роки тому +243

      hire the wendy’s people to write it

    • @guyfieri4017
      @guyfieri4017 3 роки тому +152

      @@ceebadoobee on it
      (should I actually write it orrr..👀)

    • @ceebadoobee
      @ceebadoobee 3 роки тому +72

      Wendys YES PLEASE

    • @guyfieri4017
      @guyfieri4017 3 роки тому +55

      @@ceebadoobee ight

    • @cassandraburns9073
      @cassandraburns9073 3 роки тому +52

      @@guyfieri4017 drop the title when its done? I def wanna check that out lmao

  • @calvin1559
    @calvin1559 3 роки тому +623

    Imagine the guy who runs slim jim thought he was using his personal when he DMd u

    • @copperqueen1816
      @copperqueen1816 3 роки тому +96

      to be fair the guy who runs it uses it pretty much like a personal either way

    • @CheshieD
      @CheshieD 3 роки тому +12

      @@copperqueen1816 yikes

  • @jupiterliam7961
    @jupiterliam7961 3 роки тому +1247

    wendy's: we should get someone to write fanfiction for us as a marketing strategy
    some former Tumblr kid with an English degree: M Y T I M E H A S C O M E

    • @addielo823
      @addielo823 3 роки тому +40

      What do you mean former tumblr kid... oh wait you mean tumblr adult with an English degree

    • @Hessed3712
      @Hessed3712 3 роки тому

      Jupiter Liam 🤣🤣🤣

    • @alfie3.14
      @alfie3.14 3 роки тому +4

      There's a Wendy's account on wattpad, writing love stories about food

    • @69_natalia_420
      @69_natalia_420 3 роки тому +8

      I- wendy fanfic sounds like the one weird kid who ate rocks at recess.

    • @she_evel
      @she_evel 3 роки тому +1

      I can't decide if this is a rubbing hands together evily (I think I just made a word up) situation OR a jumping up and down in joy situation!

  • @evanhoover2447
    @evanhoover2447 3 роки тому +2179

    Fun fact: Slim Jim's full name is Slimothy James.

  • @AreYouNormalBass
    @AreYouNormalBass 3 роки тому +352

    honestly the kfc dating sim is low-key amazing. i have been following the illustrator before they were hired to do the art for the game and it seems like they were treated and paid well, and they had fun doing the work, and the game has some cute and semi funny stuff in it! still very weird. obviously. and i don’t really care for kfc. but for a free game that’s essentially an advertisement it’s surprisingly high quality and entertaining lollll (better than the mario lopez lifetime movie anyway)

    • @littletomato6561
      @littletomato6561 3 роки тому +28

      Next dating sim: Jarvis at company high, following the trope of “girl at all boys school”, but with a non company at a company’s school

    • @calowenby1654
      @calowenby1654 2 роки тому +4

      Hey, come on. It was a Hallmark movie, not Lifetime.

    • @EmmaJohnsonShenanigans
      @EmmaJohnsonShenanigans Рік тому +8

      also the vanvan guy at 11:37 looked like something straight from jojos bizarre adventure

  • @BrokeTheInterweb
    @BrokeTheInterweb 3 роки тому +756

    How many of the social media interns posting as these companies are genuine 22 year old Jarvis fans taking their shot lol

    • @calowenby1654
      @calowenby1654 2 роки тому +20

      I never thought about it that way, but that is a good theory and I’m now wondering.

  • @EE-sw3uh
    @EE-sw3uh 3 роки тому +2337

    the guy who runs the slim jim account is actually pretty cool, i’ll literally *never* eat a slim jim but he does good work

    • @simiancarroll5167
      @simiancarroll5167 3 роки тому +107

      @@gangmaki he is doing his best leave him alone

    • @NathanAllebach
      @NathanAllebach 3 роки тому +136

      the original guy actually passed away tragically earlier this year, his name was andy hines

    • @gangmaki
      @gangmaki 3 роки тому +23

      @@simiancarroll5167 as long as i expressed my thoughts with respect i dont really see the need for you to tell me so

    • @cambot9281
      @cambot9281 3 роки тому +33

      Ok what is wrong with u why wouldn’t u eat the meaty stick of goodness what the heck

    • @batooldalloul9397
      @batooldalloul9397 3 роки тому

      I was 400th like

  • @Phantom95179
    @Phantom95179 3 роки тому +1625

    Brands really trying to get what Dennys Tumblr created. Pathetic.

    • @maddiepaddy2608
      @maddiepaddy2608 3 роки тому +121

      The blueprint^

    • @aliceis9068
      @aliceis9068 3 роки тому +164

      denny's tumblr was the best and only one

    • @supreme_chr375
      @supreme_chr375 3 роки тому +33

      This has nothing to do with your comment but I haven't seen a detective conan pfp in a while 👁👁

    • @lordskeletor481
      @lordskeletor481 3 роки тому +86

      Then we need to do like Tumblr did to Denny's, destroy them with memes about how their CEO's are capitalist running dogs whose collective wealth needs to be seized and redistributed to the people.

    • @alynnidalar
      @alynnidalar 3 роки тому +18

      nothing can compare with the alien nature of denny's tumblr

  • @sworishina
    @sworishina 3 роки тому +323

    Still can't believe this all happened because of the Sonic the Hedgehog Twitter account deciding to pretty much exclusively post Sanic memes lol

    • @thineevee7345
      @thineevee7345 3 роки тому +8

      Lol

    • @MilqueeWayGaming
      @MilqueeWayGaming 3 роки тому +31

      I thought it was because of the Denny’s tumblr?

    • @jj_jester
      @jj_jester 3 роки тому +14

      @@MilqueeWayGaming omg not Denny’s tumblr-

  • @OhFrittata
    @OhFrittata 3 роки тому +470

    “We use square patties so they hang over the bun, and the people like that”
    -Dave himself, founder of Wendy’s.
    Also why does Van Van look like a Jojo Character

    • @andsgradite392
      @andsgradite392 3 роки тому +20

      Insert Jojo copypasta here

    • @awesomedude5558
      @awesomedude5558 3 роки тому +7

      Huh. He does lol

    • @galaxychill9578
      @galaxychill9578 3 роки тому +19

      are you deadass goningto ignore how Aeshleigh is spelled

    • @liamk3451
      @liamk3451 3 роки тому +2

      i think thats the point

    • @callmeqt1269
      @callmeqt1269 3 роки тому +11

      Wait but I don’t like that. It’s actually super annoying. Just make it fit the freaking bun like everyone else. You’re Wendy’s - no one wants “different” they want “cheap” and “passable.” Perhaps “edible.” No one gives a darn.

  • @Pennaflumen
    @Pennaflumen 3 роки тому +1516

    Jarvis: "I am being bullied.... So do your part."
    Me: *begins bullying Jarvis*

    • @jakman8515
      @jakman8515 3 роки тому +45

      Ok.
      HA JARVIS HAS A RUBIX CUBE SHIRT AND WAS HEARING GLASSES SO HES A NERD

    • @makijaahoe3025
      @makijaahoe3025 3 роки тому +33

      Jarvis pee pee poo poo
      There

    • @yoyohayli
      @yoyohayli 3 роки тому +2

      I'll hold him down, you get some swings in. Swirly is scheduled for 3:30 in the out of order toilet.

    • @temugebagira6592
      @temugebagira6592 3 роки тому +1

      hes NEEEEEERD

    • @aaaameeera
      @aaaameeera 3 роки тому

      @@yoyohayli kk

  • @afallavollita2995
    @afallavollita2995 3 роки тому +964

    bruh the wendy's wattpad is getting so much attention. this is your fault, Jarvis.

    • @maple4597
      @maple4597 3 роки тому +36

      @moi is me *JARVIS IS TRYING HIS* _VERY_ *BEST*

    • @therealplaguerat
      @therealplaguerat 3 роки тому +1

      That sentence has probably never said before

    • @guyfieri4017
      @guyfieri4017 3 роки тому +3

      That’s good right?
      RIGHT?

    • @afallavollita2995
      @afallavollita2995 3 роки тому

      ​@@guyfieri4017 #WendysWorldDomination2021 🤗

  • @masadius
    @masadius 3 роки тому +254

    I really love how kum & go just responded with "kum & go"

  • @baconhotline
    @baconhotline 3 роки тому +322

    Hey Jarvis did you know home depot also has a wattpad account and reads southpark fanfics

  • @bedazledblue5927
    @bedazledblue5927 3 роки тому +2524

    I love how no ones talking about Wendy’s writing Jarvis and SlimJim fanfic.

  • @Meppity
    @Meppity 3 роки тому +3594

    Why does this feel like the Subway bit from Community has leaked into reality?

    • @charliesweb7071
      @charliesweb7071 3 роки тому +72

      Meppity THATS WHAT I WAS THINKING

    • @thedestroyasystem
      @thedestroyasystem 3 роки тому +28

      OMG SAME

    • @karyssa5
      @karyssa5 3 роки тому +131

      Okay but also like that whole bit in community about KFC where they made that space simulator- like that has to be next right?

    • @thedestroyasystem
      @thedestroyasystem 3 роки тому +11

      @@karyssa5 omg so true

    • @allih6444
      @allih6444 3 роки тому +30

      @@karyssa5 The KFC game console sounds pretty similar to it so maybe that will be part of the game 😂

  • @hazeltracey8771
    @hazeltracey8771 3 роки тому +552

    Take a shot every time Jarvis says “bRaNdS aRe JuSt LiKe uS”

    • @Lostfloortile
      @Lostfloortile 3 роки тому +20

      I'm try not to die from alcohol poison

    • @kathansen6995
      @kathansen6995 3 роки тому +6

      Idk why I thought screenshot

    • @elani9624
      @elani9624 3 роки тому +4

      @@kathansen6995 Lmao same

  • @Iron_Stigmata
    @Iron_Stigmata 3 роки тому +192

    "brands are inescapable" ok but have you seen Tumblr? Idk who tf is putting ads on there but it sure as hell isn't Wendy's 😭

    • @extrnalsorce4974
      @extrnalsorce4974 3 роки тому +6

      I don’t know what this implies, but I don’t like it

    • @Iron_Stigmata
      @Iron_Stigmata 3 роки тому +78

      @@extrnalsorce4974 Tumblr's ads will basically just be something like the following: a low resolution picture of a pebble with the title "Brazilian Pizza Farms?" then the subtitle will just be a keyboard smash. I am not exaggerating

    • @extrnalsorce4974
      @extrnalsorce4974 3 роки тому +21

      @@Iron_Stigmata Sounds like heaven and hell

    • @Iron_Stigmata
      @Iron_Stigmata 3 роки тому +42

      @@extrnalsorce4974 It fits the chaos of my dashboard very well ngl. Sometimes there will be ads I mistake as shitposts

    • @acrylicabyss
      @acrylicabyss 3 роки тому +5

      Denny’s scares me

  • @themarshmellowchemist299
    @themarshmellowchemist299 3 роки тому +714

    I think Wendy's actually hired a 16 year old to write their stories on wattpad.

    • @anonymous71207
      @anonymous71207 3 роки тому +72

      that writing is way too good for wattpad tbh so I could see it

    • @simly5189
      @simly5189 3 роки тому +10

      I know and I actually love it. It’s so ridiculous it’s great

    • @guyfieri4017
      @guyfieri4017 3 роки тому +1

      no i did it myself

    • @calowenby1654
      @calowenby1654 2 роки тому +5

      If they did, at least that little writer got paid.

  • @letsdaze1168
    @letsdaze1168 3 роки тому +818

    I believe Wendy’s started the whole twitter thing and every other brand decided to jump on making it less cool and more annoying

    • @TheRainyKingdom
      @TheRainyKingdom 3 роки тому +145

      Denny’s was on tumblr a while back which I believe started it

    • @trinity-ul2es
      @trinity-ul2es 3 роки тому +61

      slim jim has a whole fucked up meme page, and has had it for a while

    • @bruhjime2675
      @bruhjime2675 3 роки тому +35

      It wasn't cool. Ever. Nobody ruined it Wendys was annoying from the very beginning.

    • @simly5189
      @simly5189 3 роки тому +26

      I always find it super funny when brands do this. I know I’m feeding into it, but it’s exactly the nonsensical ridiculous crap that is my humour

    • @guyfieri4017
      @guyfieri4017 3 роки тому +1

      Ikr i hate followers 🤢

  • @alisathemushroom9923
    @alisathemushroom9923 3 роки тому +42

    The emotional tug-a-war of “this is a soulless company trying to get your money” and “this is a regular person running the account” is stressful. I heard that the younger generation is the most mentally ill and depressed in modern history, so seeing a brand trying to connect with that, humanizing their brand, in effort to get us to spend more and more money is sick. But on the other hand, those young people are running the accounts, and may genuinely be struggling. I hate these blurry lines, they are hurting my eyes and my mind

    • @mintsmooth860
      @mintsmooth860 Рік тому +8

      easy, brand = bad. the person behind the account might be real but its not who they are, its their job. they're doing this because a 60yo boomer company ceo told them to. if you want to connect with a person, go on their personal account

    • @hb6839
      @hb6839 Рік тому

      ​@@mintsmooth860 so real

  • @youtubeviolatedme7123
    @youtubeviolatedme7123 3 роки тому +103

    Don't take a shot every time he says "brand" because your liver deserves better

  • @RayhartTwins
    @RayhartTwins 3 роки тому +10282

    If you’re not in the next KFC dating sim game we’re rioting.

  • @jade747
    @jade747 3 роки тому +602

    The tiktok thing is so weird because now brands are trying to get employees to make tiktoks for marketing. but when employees were actually sharing aspects of their jobs because they genuinely enjoy it and wanted to share that with their followers, people were getting fired for it.

    • @bonnecherie
      @bonnecherie 3 роки тому +72

      Ironically Sherwin Williams fired a guy for even suggesting the idea. Apparently they didn't like him 'wasting company time and resources' even though he bought the paints he didn't mix for customers himself and did some some of the work on his off time. He had his entire TikTok account set up for it, and SW just smacked it down. Considering my husband used to work for them, it doesn't shock me. >.>

    • @yawninglion1677
      @yawninglion1677 3 роки тому +16

      Literally looking for internship jobs and a lot of brands are looking for people to do every social media thing ever, including Instagram and Tik Tok. One brand even wanted someone who could make "dank memes". It's crazy.

    • @besos4169
      @besos4169 3 роки тому +14

      That's capitalism for you

  • @demarisoxman4600
    @demarisoxman4600 3 роки тому +40

    that episode of Community where Subway was a person turned out to be weirdly prophetic

  • @reddishcanine
    @reddishcanine 3 роки тому +69

    New game: “Was this tweet from a real person, or from a brand twitter account?”

  • @DZENITA.
    @DZENITA. 3 роки тому +4256

    anyone else remember when Wendys dropped a mixtape coming after other fast food companys... or was that some weird fever dream i had

    • @emi-ne1kv
      @emi-ne1kv 3 роки тому +175

      oh god not the MIXTAPE

    • @emilj5143
      @emilj5143 3 роки тому +252

      if it wasn't true maybe it was our collective fever dream

    • @emi-ne1kv
      @emi-ne1kv 3 роки тому +139

      @@emilj5143 mandela effect watching us: i wanted to see if i was powerful enough to twist their minds

    • @kylestark7409
      @kylestark7409 3 роки тому +35

      God I remember the Wendy’s rpg, that was ... interesting.

    • @dsaybra
      @dsaybra 3 роки тому +39

      there was a hamburger helper mixtape too

  • @Caldella
    @Caldella 3 роки тому +619

    Food brand games in 1996: "Let's put a Doom clone in kids' cereal!"
    Food brand games in 2020: "Oh, Colonel senpai!"

    • @1999colebug
      @1999colebug 3 роки тому +14

      Colonial.

    • @Caldella
      @Caldella 3 роки тому +6

      @@1999colebug Lol yay autocorrect.

    • @natashamilton4298
      @natashamilton4298 3 роки тому +14

      i read this twice because i thought nothing was wrong with it. theyve broken me. the brands have broken me

  • @calebdahlheimer1471
    @calebdahlheimer1471 3 роки тому +111

    I can't believe Jarvis leaked his DM's with Steak-Ems
    smh my head

  • @littleblueclovers
    @littleblueclovers 3 роки тому +72

    I know it’s artificial as hell, but I can’t get myself to hate it. I prefer it to brands being overly formal and professional.
    I also like the idea that they’re hiring memelords to run their Twitter. That gives me a spark of joy.

  • @Virac0cha
    @Virac0cha 3 роки тому +818

    There is nothing funnier in all of brand Twitter than “chicken chamber”

    • @Dgero
      @Dgero 3 роки тому +23

      Quoth the Sanders, “ c h i c k e n c h a m b e r ”

    • @alexanderharrison7421
      @alexanderharrison7421 3 роки тому +16

      That's it, you're going to the *Chicken Chamber*

    • @lillythepone2994
      @lillythepone2994 3 роки тому

      Damn, guess KFC is taking design advice from 1940’s Germany

    • @cb.on.yt22
      @cb.on.yt22 3 роки тому

      most importantly of course

    • @SwizzleDrizzl
      @SwizzleDrizzl 3 роки тому +1

      *uh oh, you did an oopsie! into the chicken chamber with you*

  • @KenJee_ds
    @KenJee_ds 3 роки тому +7573

    Thank GOD the KFC Console will be available before Christmas...

  • @yellowwwmellowww
    @yellowwwmellowww 3 роки тому +79

    Come back next time to see “Which brand will Jarvis be f cking next?” !

  • @EliteInferno14
    @EliteInferno14 3 роки тому +16

    Every time I hear about brands in any capacity I always come back to that meme with the crab shooting the lasers and saying SILENCE B R A N D

  • @ianowens1905
    @ianowens1905 3 роки тому +701

    Imagine being so popular SLIM JIM texts you like they’re your friend

    • @marvingonzalez8586
      @marvingonzalez8586 3 роки тому +6

      Too bad their products are shit

    • @ianowens1905
      @ianowens1905 3 роки тому +2

      @@marvingonzalez8586 eh, they’re ok

    • @swampman420
      @swampman420 3 роки тому +8

      @@ianowens1905 if someone gave me a slim jim i'd be grateful but a little puzzled

    • @thelmd1347
      @thelmd1347 3 роки тому +1

      @@swampman420 me too

    • @DDub04
      @DDub04 3 роки тому +4

      Jarvis should start referring to them as Slim James

  • @idkdy5972
    @idkdy5972 3 роки тому +1010

    "why is everyone addressed by their first and last name"
    -Jarvis Johnson

    • @me30000
      @me30000 3 роки тому +41

      J. Jonah Jameson Jr. is rolling in his grave

    • @idkdy5972
      @idkdy5972 3 роки тому +14

      @PestoMayo hey Pesto Mayo

    • @nevergivingup3434
      @nevergivingup3434 3 роки тому +3

      I think it's a french thing

    • @ronin_wins
      @ronin_wins 3 роки тому

      @PestoMayo I am one of those kids

    • @Pixel3572
      @Pixel3572 3 роки тому +1

      Some people missed the joke in this comment lol

  • @Farmdafish
    @Farmdafish 3 роки тому +93

    This man actually got flex tape to notice them. Actual legend

  • @bzckqtfg418
    @bzckqtfg418 3 роки тому +21

    KFC has a romance novella "Tender Wings of Desire."

  • @medievalmayden
    @medievalmayden 3 роки тому +833

    Jarvis did you make this whole video because you were sad about the hat

  • @thepresence365
    @thepresence365 3 роки тому +380

    "Surely there's a person who runs that account..."
    No, Jarvis. The online brand accounds have become sentient 😨

  • @fara16
    @fara16 3 роки тому +10

    This has even more relevance now that Mario Lopez is playing Colonel Sanders in Lifetime's A Recipe for Seduction 😭

  • @nidhi2693
    @nidhi2693 3 роки тому +33

    bagel bites supporting bts and chips ahoy stanning loona is the fever dream that i did not ask for... it's cute but why

  • @anna_banana414
    @anna_banana414 3 роки тому +309

    I was looking away when he started reading the Wendy’s wattpad and when he said “Courtney Craig” I 100% miss heard it as HORNY Craig and i was very taken aback 😭

  • @5ft4inprotagonist24
    @5ft4inprotagonist24 3 роки тому +3019

    Brands are just like us. They want to date Jarvis Johnson j/

  • @bnashee
    @bnashee 3 роки тому +8

    I think its so funny how the kfc dating sim definitely traced jojo for that character

  • @Tw0Dots
    @Tw0Dots 3 роки тому +9

    3:21
    SunnyD-pressed

  • @bloomishere3095
    @bloomishere3095 3 роки тому +165

    Imagine waking up and looking in your DMs only to find Ronald McDonald saying “Hey big boy”

  • @inbasicterms-popculturevid1704
    @inbasicterms-popculturevid1704 3 роки тому +1889

    I'm just here to boost that algorithm to help my boy Jarvis thrive

    • @tyleralan1470
      @tyleralan1470 3 роки тому +39

      do replies help?

    • @tyleralan1470
      @tyleralan1470 3 роки тому +37

      cause like

    • @tyleralan1470
      @tyleralan1470 3 роки тому +42

      ill make a whole thread to help our boy

    • @tyleralan1470
      @tyleralan1470 3 роки тому +39

      you know cause our boy is da man

    • @tyleralan1470
      @tyleralan1470 3 роки тому +49

      and also whats up with butter on pancakes who thought of that?

  • @consentclub8431
    @consentclub8431 3 роки тому +7

    Brand Twitter needs group therapy

  • @realchrishawkes
    @realchrishawkes 3 роки тому +74

    Congrats bro

  • @iam.august
    @iam.august 3 роки тому +269

    Uno: tells us how to play their game
    Everyone else: shut up what do you know

  • @emiliopena4542
    @emiliopena4542 3 роки тому +442

    If I had to sum up this video in a single sentence it would be: Jarvis having an existential crisis while simultaneously simping for anime Colonel Sanders for 16 (not so straight) minutes

  • @-xphobia
    @-xphobia 3 роки тому +5

    Prince EA be like: "Did KFC ever actually stand for something?" *mindblown*

  • @legospider1437
    @legospider1437 3 роки тому +4

    '"Should I keep talking about this or am I giving brands exactly what they want?"
    yes

  • @therealplaguerat
    @therealplaguerat 3 роки тому +161

    P-Kentucky
    S-Fried
    5-Console

    • @Hanzaggity
      @Hanzaggity 3 роки тому +7

      N-N-NANIII!?

    • @amara3591
      @amara3591 3 роки тому +7

      ANNNNDDD WE HAVE A WINNER

    • @lj.853
      @lj.853 3 роки тому +7

      You'll never believe the best conspiracy theory yet!...

    • @hihigh6814
      @hihigh6814 3 роки тому +1

      YOU CRACKED THE CODE

    • @therealplaguerat
      @therealplaguerat 3 роки тому

      @@hihigh6814 KFC seized the ps5 orders

  • @AeroViro
    @AeroViro 3 роки тому +4181

    It's absolutely fascinating to watch but also that entire segment about colonel sanders?... well....
    👀 ya know what I'm saying...

  • @frankierosapple_1968
    @frankierosapple_1968 3 роки тому +5

    4:49 I follow Wendy’s on Wattpad. As a writer, Wattpad is my life purpose.

  • @Nick_The_foxx
    @Nick_The_foxx 3 роки тому +5

    I can't wait to play the KFC dating sim with the KFConsole

  • @grap3water
    @grap3water 3 роки тому +393

    Jarvis x slim jim wendy's needs to write fanfics about this

  • @icantswim7282
    @icantswim7282 3 роки тому +790

    Potbelly: this is Jarvis's fault
    Jarvis's fans: *JARVIS IS TRYING HIS BEST*

  • @DuncTV
    @DuncTV 3 роки тому +66

    It would be REALLY good publicity if these companies paid their workers living wages 🤪😍

  • @three3656
    @three3656 2 роки тому +1

    "Shut Up Uno No One Was Talking To You"
    *Sad Uno Noises*

  • @stardoogalaxie9314
    @stardoogalaxie9314 3 роки тому +502

    Brands, using slave labor and paying people minimum wage: we're JUST like you!!! We love you! We're your friend!! 😌🤗✨

    • @rVnsunshine
      @rVnsunshine 3 роки тому +73

      @Yeetus Defeetus that intern also probably isn’t paid enough and yet is tasked with the thankless job of pandering to internet people™. Isn’t late-stage capitalism ironic?

    • @estabanbattleslayer1875
      @estabanbattleslayer1875 3 роки тому +5

      @@rVnsunshine Late stage? We’re just getting started

    • @rVnsunshine
      @rVnsunshine 3 роки тому +36

      @Yeetus Defeetus No one is attacking the intern, my guy. Very clearly OP is talking about the company which requires interns to put on a façade while simultaneously fucking themselves up the ass. Maybe give people the benefit of the doubt.

    • @porguinturtle3854
      @porguinturtle3854 3 роки тому +2

      @@rVnsunshine intern... getting paid? Ah yes paid interns

    • @bookbad2356
      @bookbad2356 3 роки тому

      @@rVnsunshine
      What do you mean thankless?
      Ah yes the person running an account deserves thousands of accolades.
      How do you even know what these people are being paid?

  • @dappermancer
    @dappermancer 3 роки тому +634

    I know this has literally nothing to do with the topic at hand, but Jarvis' eyelashes looked really pretty in this video

    • @ultimatequeenofdeath666
      @ultimatequeenofdeath666 3 роки тому +16

      YOOOO youre also a carter, whats up!

    • @sockholderz
      @sockholderz 3 роки тому +17

      OMG U RIGHT!!!!! hes a pretty boy

    • @dappermancer
      @dappermancer 3 роки тому +15

      @@ultimatequeenofdeath666 YOOOOO

    • @mrahzzz
      @mrahzzz 3 роки тому +12

      Honestly, on this topic, the longest, most beautiful, luscious eyelashes I've ever seen belonged to an old college lab partner of mine. He probably got a little weirded out during labs because I probably stared at his eyelashes/into his eyes a little too long and a little too often because of how luscious they were.
      I swear some men have eyelashes for dayyys.

    • @dappermancer
      @dappermancer 3 роки тому +6

      @@mrahzzz You, comrade, are incredibly valid

  • @makotari3190
    @makotari3190 3 роки тому +8

    Can't wait to play cyberpunk in the new KFConsole while eating fried chicken

  • @Tinychristmastreechipmunk
    @Tinychristmastreechipmunk 8 місяців тому +1

    The Slim Jim joke had me dying laughing for TWO MINUTES straight. HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO UNIRONICLY LAUGH FOR TWO MINUTES? APPARENTLY ITS POSSIBLE WITH SLIM JIM.
    What am I saying?
    Slim Jim is love, Slim Jim is life, and Slim Jim is tasty beef snack.

  • @donuted_ace
    @donuted_ace 3 роки тому +144

    cant wait to get a job as a wendy's fanfic writer

    • @aidenhoogstra8636
      @aidenhoogstra8636 3 роки тому +6

      @Maisie Crookston
      Screaming Through Time: (walking into office) Hi I’m here for the interview?
      Manager: great, why don’t you sit dow-
      Screaming: DORA LOOKED LONGINGLY INTO DIEGO’S EYES. ‘ITS WRONG, WE’RE COUSINS’...

    • @user-zt4lp7fn1q
      @user-zt4lp7fn1q 3 роки тому +3

      @@aidenhoogstra8636 oh pls no no no

    • @lilypaigeham
      @lilypaigeham 3 роки тому

      @@aidenhoogstra8636 OH I SEE

  • @ReddeSpectre
    @ReddeSpectre 3 роки тому +99

    KFC has a romance novel too. It's called Tender Wings of Desire. Do with this information what you will.

  • @DiamondWisps
    @DiamondWisps 2 місяці тому +1

    I'm hoping whoever runs the slim jim account was just like "Damn, I love Jarvis, I wish there was a way for him to actually read how much I love thid video.... WAIT"

  • @umejiaku6
    @umejiaku6 3 роки тому +4

    13:42 YES! companies are forcing employees to do tiktok videos. Im a pharmacy technician at Walmart and on top of processing dozens of COVID shots daily and all of our other duties, we're now being forced to do STUPID TIKTOK SHIT!!...It's fucking insanity. This is company wide, so if you see one, know that we didn't have a choice. I just wanna do my damn job 😩

  • @oliviataylor9992
    @oliviataylor9992 3 роки тому +135

    The amount of tension between Colonel Sanders and Jarvis is immaculate

  • @sianvaladian8574
    @sianvaladian8574 3 роки тому +71

    To be fair that wendy's wattpad fic is exactly what wattpad fics are like

  • @jakesouthern4050
    @jakesouthern4050 3 роки тому +11

    Remember kids, brands are more scared of you than you are scared of them

  • @prachisaini1
    @prachisaini1 3 роки тому +8

    We need more brand talks here 😉. We Love talks more than their stocks , i mean their whole inventory of products and supplies.

  • @hedgeearthridge6807
    @hedgeearthridge6807 3 роки тому +361

    If we made tik-toks at my last job at an auto parts store, we would have intentionally embarrassed the company so much that their profits would've taken a hit. Me and pretty much all my coworkers were pretty transparent about how shitty the company is. Which made the customers like us more.

    • @marvingonzalez8586
      @marvingonzalez8586 3 роки тому +11

      I think Making Tik Toks at an auto part is already weird

  • @rellimeelrahc
    @rellimeelrahc 3 роки тому +112

    KFC is just vibing on a whole other plane of existence at this point

  • @thiswaypls5
    @thiswaypls5 3 роки тому +2

    jarvis x slimjim fanfics aus in the making

  • @michoislost
    @michoislost 2 роки тому +1

    bruh imagine telling Coronel Sanders that he's a hot anime boy now, guy would probably lose his marbles

  • @lporter9702
    @lporter9702 3 роки тому +310

    “brands suck”
    “now a word from our sponsor”

    • @adammurray9177
      @adammurray9177 3 роки тому +5

      Jarvis talking about how hot brands are and them hooking up
      Jarvis’ GF: 👁👄👁

    • @rm_steele
      @rm_steele 3 роки тому +2

      That's funny, he should've made a joke about that

  • @heyhey97777
    @heyhey97777 3 роки тому +1021

    Brands are officially becoming anime stalkers.

  • @dub-jscrub-j2762
    @dub-jscrub-j2762 3 роки тому +6

    The reason that they DMed you was because they knew that if they did something wacky and zany, they might make it into you video.

  • @theredazazelle6185
    @theredazazelle6185 2 роки тому +2

    Velveeta isn't cheese by definition, cheese is made from the curds found in spoiled milk (what we call cottage cheee) and Velveeta is made the same way as American sliced "cheese" by creating a product from the weigh found in spoiled milk (generally by powerizing half of it and mixing it with the liquid portion then allowing it to congeal into a large loaf) although both products are called "cheese" by the masses the fact is American cheese and Velveeta are both not true cheeses as a result of their lack of curds during the production process

  • @priultimus
    @priultimus 3 роки тому +517

    13:00 theyre literally making fun of cyberpunk 2077 LOL you missed that Jarvis

    • @J4ygotskrilla
      @J4ygotskrilla 3 роки тому +1

      How?

    • @priultimus
      @priultimus 3 роки тому +83

      @@J4ygotskrilla jarvis mentions how they use bright red, which is their branding and they write text regarding a delay on that brand that matches the colour. If you look at Cyberpunk 2077's delays they're yellow like their branding and they had to move their release date to dec 10th, which is one day after when KFC said they had to "move" their release day

    • @J4ygotskrilla
      @J4ygotskrilla 3 роки тому +2

      Oh ok

    • @yadsewnde8699
      @yadsewnde8699 3 роки тому +12

      @@J4ygotskrilla it's also pretty on par with CD red's cyberpunk message in wording too lol. I couldn't help but laugh

    • @_HuffleProud_
      @_HuffleProud_ 3 роки тому +3

      I think a better time stamp would be around 12:30 jsyk :)

  • @louis-patricklauzon7044
    @louis-patricklauzon7044 3 роки тому +716

    SLIMJIM CCCOMMENTS ON EVERY INSTA MEME I SEE AND IT SCARES ME

    • @spiplayrojo4745
      @spiplayrojo4745 3 роки тому +18

      I have no memes

    • @callmeqt1269
      @callmeqt1269 3 роки тому +46

      @@spiplayrojo4745 wait... that’s relatable. If you follow my thought process here... not having memes is a meme in and of itself. We have out memed the very nature of memes. It’s a meme paradox and now we can’t escape.

    • @lukefischer3688
      @lukefischer3688 3 роки тому +11

      slim jim has good taste

    • @toastwell6488
      @toastwell6488 3 роки тому +19

      That social media guy must be really bored or something.

    • @thepeoplewhodostuff997
      @thepeoplewhodostuff997 3 роки тому

      Louis-Patrick Lauzon OMG UR PROFILE IS A FLAMINGO YASSSSSSS

  • @brianhinsonbh
    @brianhinsonbh 3 роки тому +2

    The wattpad stories have me in actual tears

  • @cxrindgo
    @cxrindgo 3 роки тому +1

    I think the most surreal part was seeing Van Van which is so obviously traced from Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure

  • @lydiaedwards09
    @lydiaedwards09 3 роки тому +60

    bruh Community predicted this. Subway was given a human form and now it's happening. Prepare yourselves

  • @CutiePie4325
    @CutiePie4325 3 роки тому +111

    imagine the one intern somewhere who forgot to switch to their personal twitter and started this entire culture.

  • @bryanw.8589
    @bryanw.8589 3 роки тому +32

    Yo slim Jim gets a pass, their page is actually lit 🔥

  • @Yo_its_Ghost
    @Yo_its_Ghost 3 роки тому

    I can't help put laugh at the Uno comment, "pipe done uno, no one was taking to you?!" Love it.

  • @erinkelley2129
    @erinkelley2129 3 роки тому +174

    I feel like this video is just Jarvis having an existential crisis

  • @georgeolund7572
    @georgeolund7572 3 роки тому +130

    I’ve played the Kfc dating sim before it is actually kinda fun especially if you play it with friends and give the characters voices.

  • @laneyjill1899
    @laneyjill1899 3 роки тому +5

    14:45 “pahpah”?