daeron39 Was running next to the airport and some damn event happened where I got drugged or something and ended up on some train tracks with my clothes missing
If you walk around with the epsilon robes and say hi to a pedestrian they reply by saying kifflom lol and when you walk in a store the cashier will say kifflom
I have two views for this scenario. 1 - Michael planned to rob the cult after learning how much money circulated in it. The last side mission was his lucky window. 2 - Michael legit joined the Epsilon program, but snapped back to thief reality after seeing all the cash.
No long after he joined the program he realized it was bullshit made to steal innocent people's money. You can notice it when he tried to warn marnie about that but she was already seriously into it. Maybe he was trying to give the program a chance in the beggining but at some point he just wanted to rob them
They deserved it. Cris is only in it for money, hence why he was travelling to the Cayman Islands with everyone’s money. If you think Michael is in the wrong there is something wrong with you.
This is a total satire of Scientology done GTA style. Getting supposed enlightenment drip-fed to you while also having to pay an increasing amount of money only to find out it is a giant scam.
How I Felt doing these missions one big Scam,(Kept you in a Continuous pattern of Paying them),They were all Looney/Nutcases-Nut-jobs everything comes outta there mouth doesn't + Up=Making Sense I had a Laugh when I got a Call from a “Triggered” Cris still got the Ocelot left at the end of the Airplane Mission Near Fort Zancudo.
What I find interesting about the Epsilon Program is that they think they know everything about life. They think they can trick Michael into making him believe in higher aspects of life and making him think he will gain wisdom with following the ways of the ones that are above. All of that just to scam him in the end. But here's the thing... Michael knew exactly what he was dealing with. He makes them think that he is a lost person, in search of a higher purpose, with zero experience. And the funny part of this is that Michael has more life-experience than all members of the Epsilon Program combined. He lived his whole life as a criminal and has dealt with much bigger threats and tricksters. He just wants to test himself. That's what I like so much about this.
In my opinion, the fact that we were able to screw the Epsilon program after so many years of trying to uncover what it is, finding only dead ends and theories across all of the games for decades until GTA V came out... was the best gift Rockstar could've given us.
@@wetube6513 You're asking for too much man... sorry, I can't. The 2000's were the best, and still nowadays the relentless pass of time surprises me. I leave these kind of comments because I feel like it, I apologize if they offend you, but I feel like it's the right thing to do.
@@Miguelnumbers Nah Man. I totally understand what you're talking about. As a matter of fact the farther we get away from the 80s the better they look.
@@maximvsdread1610 Every era has it's ups and downs, that's a fact. I may be from 2001, but I always thought both the 90's and 80's were the best time to be an American citizen, too bad I couldn't experience them.
He says -Will these trees just shut up? -Trees talk, but they're not very interesting. -Oh brother, brother, brother. What have i gotten myself into? -It ain't a cult, it ain't a cult, it ain't...A cult -How do you know when you're ready but you're not ready, and ready all at once? -You can't put a price on self-actualization. Actually you can, and i'm paying it -Hey, i'm self-actualizing over here. -I got a cloud empire in the planet and i'm a king, just like everyone else is. -Maybe i'm so scabby, because i'm at 47.000 places at a time.
The most tedious is wearing their robes for ten days without switching characters. But it's so rewarding at the end when you blow them for 2.1 Millions.
Canyon Storm Not really. I just went to Sandy Shores Airfield, bound my controller with some string, put some weight on the runbutton and just let him run in circles while I did some chores around my appartment.
I first heard it in a Team Fortress 2 custom map, I was extremely confused when I played GTA V for the first time and heard it in a random radio station.
This has got to be one of the grindiest overall completion. At a certain point you feel bad for them. But then, the leaders ultimately make you feel so used and scammy. The finale was oh so rewarding 😂😂😂😂
I knew I was getting robbed once I wasted more than 500,000 dollars for everything so I stole the blue car in the last mission, got away Whit it and got 2 million dollars
Look athatdingo just kill all the creeps and get to the tractor, get in it and lose the cops but don't drive too far from the money. After u escaped the cops, go back to the money, get in that kifflom audi car, and you will get ur money automatically. Congratulations, u have both the money and the old ass tractor
I was 50% done with doing the desert run manually but I (for some reason) ACCIDENTALLY switched my character, and when I switched back, Michael's outfit changed, so I had to get back home and redress myself which led to a complete reset of my progress 💀 RIP
LOL! If Rockstar expected me to waste time running 5 miles then they were mistaken. I tied a rubber band to the left analog stick and taped the A button on my xbox controller and went on about my business like writing this comment.
I was once constipated for five days then I sat on the bowl and said " KIFFLOM" and the poop left me like a log jam flowing down river..KRAFT BE PRAISED.
If u still doing this , I have a tip for the running mission Bring your AirPods case and stick it in the middle between R3 and L3 and put something heavy on the x and leave him run in circles by himself 0 effort 😁 or just hold x , or u can do it without holding x but it’s gonna take longer I went to eat and came back all done 😁 Kifflom brothers 🤣😁
@@Puma8000 there is a mission called What Lies Beneath that's is given to Michael by Abigail. In order to complete it, you have to purchase the Sonar Collections Dock. Word of warning: You have to find submarine parts, and all you get out of it is a few dollars. Don't waste your time.
@@benja-tp1sp Yeah,i like in every story (must complete/shortcut or alternative "chase" route) jump with Trevor,no matter how trashy i still complete it,but with a smooth,straight jump with my friggen 1mil Ztype,I fail.Fuck
I would like to point out that the Epsilon program evaluation thing asked if you had red hair and a birthmark, if you play RDR2 a miscellaneous character named Francis Sinclair is a time traveller and he has red hair and a birthmark, Was Francis Sinclair planned during the making of GTA V that came out in 2013 and RDR2 came out in 2018 5 years later
It’s probably not planned. There’s a sort of stigma about people with red hair. People back in the day used to think they were psychic or something or they had some sort of spiritual abilities. Birth marks? Well I can see some sort of bullshit case being made that they’re like the mark of god or something. They probably just made something up in GTA and then used it later on in Red Dead as a little Easter egg.
I was 14 at the time of completing the achievement. I watched several videos including this one. I’m now 24 and I can’t believe a whole decade has passed. Where did the time go? Glad I was able to come back to this. THE MOST ODD MISSION IN GTA!!
Yeah, she was a drug addict in the last game..they really got her character down in GTA 5...she has really wide eyes and a strange demeanor which is exactly how a past heroin addict acts.. also considering Kifflom which is mocking Scientology.. reels people in who are vulnerable, and make it seem like they are there to “help” them.. helping them get through the loss of a family member, helping them get off drugs...by paying the cult large amounts of money:.so once these people trade their sorrows for Scientology (kifflom) they believe it is a part of them, because it really helped them get through a hard time, and it tugs on their emotions making them stay in the organization.
Considered how they dealed with Johnny Klebitz and United Liberty Paper, Marnie at least got luckuy. Yes, she is from scientology, but got free from heroin.
if you're stuck on the wear the robe for 10 days part, just keep blowing yourself up. it'll tell you when you're at the 7 days part, then you'll finish. it just takes a bit of time
Late reply, but, depending on where you are in the story, Michael has ties to Solomon, a known Vinewood movie producer. I'm sure Cris might find ways to make Michael pay, the same way Devon Weston tried to.
"AND IM STUCK TALKING TO YOU BECAUSE NO ONE ELSE GIVES A SH*T. OH, IM LIVING A DREAM, BABY. AND THAT DREAM IS F*CKED IT IS. FFFFF*KING F*CKED" - Michael to Chris
The Epsilon Centre is by Michael's house and the Children of the Mountin Centre is by Franklin's original house. Trevor just likes hikers so was bound to meet the Alturists at some point.
"According to her Bleeter account, part of her duties in the Epsilon Program, is to sleep with gay movie stars to convince them they're straight."(gta wiki) LOL LOL LOL LOL
I was already wandering the dessert for 4.8 miles and then some ocelot killed me and i died and then the epsilon outfit was reset to michael’s normal gray suit. So in order to equip the epsilon robes, i have to go to michael’s house which of course, made me do the whole wandering around again
To be honest I really hated this mission for how long it takes to finish it from the running 5 miles to wearing the outfit for 10 days while being idle
I actually do want to know more about The Epsilon Program and about Cris to see where he came from and how he started to believe in all this Kifflom stuff.
2 years but it's basically how Scientology works you do a personality test and they brainwash you and shit and you have to pay em and you are stuck signing a contract
Lazlow: You guys were roaming around and chanting lip balm Chris: It's kifflom. Lazlow: Whatever both sounds ridiculous to me. Remember Gta Sa radio wctr
Chris never did anything. All he did was he wasted Michael's time and stole $90,500, but in the end Michael took his refund $2,100,000. That's a good choice, I agree.
The best thing about this mission is it's a long con worth putting up with until the moment you can finally take their money and your frustration out on them with a bazooka.
Effort saving tip: instead of running through the desert just hold sprint and turn and spin around in a circle while doing somet else on ur phone. Thats what im doing right now
![GTA 5 - Altruist Cult Shootout [Altruist Acolyte Achievement / Trophy]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/7OclxjjuaAA/mqdefault.jpg)
I was about 4,5 miles walking in the desert when suddenly a Puma killed me
Same i was about 3.9 miles in and fucking police killed me
@@BlaziingPyro how did you get the cops on you?
@@gennoble6363 there were some bikers about to kill me so i killed them and the police came
daeron39 Was running next to the airport and some damn event happened where I got drugged or something and ended up on some train tracks with my clothes missing
@@BlaziingPyro the cops ruin everything.
Love how Michael uses Kifflom as a wild card for answering Epsilon's questions.
Nyxlich
When the question’s too retarded to answer - Kifflom!
Are you gay?
Kifflom!!
Whats eight plus forty
cris formage in the special kid corner: Kifflom!!!!
What’s 9 + 10?
*KIFFLOM!*
Kifflom!
Rockstar is king at making weird missions
kultdemon_geryox no kidding
kultdemon_geryox
Yeah, collecting a broken radio for a hobo is really wierd.
Also kicking garden gnomes as a revenge for the angry midget lady and collecting rubber bands to create a weapon of mass destruction.
kultdemon_geryox does campaign have to be completed?
No doubt
39:07 I love how he ran 5 miles in the desert only to find a random guy who says "kifflom"
hahaha thats cool
All npc's says Kifflom when you're wearing the Epsilon outfit
@@calangoraivoso9921 really?
@@crjelias too real
KIFFLOM
If you walk around with the epsilon robes and say hi to a pedestrian they reply by saying kifflom lol and when you walk in a store the cashier will say kifflom
VloneFazo and LSC customs shop
Wait... how do you say hi??
Kifflon brother brother
@@Leah2408 Press the I believe right button
VloneFazo Us fellow members are all over the globe
The walking 5 miles part was a flashback for me of swimming half way around the map in San Andreas to increase my lung capacity for the Woozy mission.
Haha i did the same thing to
Im Focus jjkolk
***** YOU SIT ON A THRONE OF LIES
SO YOU ADMIT IT! jk lol
i know i been using it too *GTA5OnlineGenerator. com*
my friends told me
when school started
trevor: when we gonna do the big score??
michael:kifflom..
Even better:
Trevor: michael when we are getting brad out of jail?
Michael: kifflom
More better
Trevor: Up there in North Yankton who was buried in your grave
Michael: Kifflom
Franklin: Evolution is a bitch
@@jonathanpapadax6064 even better:
Trevor:did somebody say yoga?
Michael:Kifflom
Kifflom!
Kifflom!
I have two views for this scenario.
1 - Michael planned to rob the cult after learning how much money circulated in it. The last side mission was his lucky window.
2 - Michael legit joined the Epsilon program, but snapped back to thief reality after seeing all the cash.
Of course money will break anyone from cult brainwashing,definitely micheal
I’m going with 3 where he just went along with it and was gonna rob them either way
Honestly, either scenario could fit Michael’s character well.
No long after he joined the program he realized it was bullshit made to steal innocent people's money. You can notice it when he tried to warn marnie about that but she was already seriously into it. Maybe he was trying to give the program a chance in the beggining but at some point he just wanted to rob them
@@DVDL1907 that’s how I see it
Shooting the cult members and stealing all of the money after going through that is such a Michael thing to do. Don't mess with this thief.
A Micheal thing to do lol
They deserved it. Cris is only in it for money, hence why he was travelling to the Cayman Islands with everyone’s money. If you think Michael is in the wrong there is something wrong with you.
@@mjkg6026 I think we gave him over 65,000
@@lewisgarner5615 it's a bit more
@@E-raticWarrior no I mean when Micheal gives Them money
Imagine paying so much to the scam and getting an old rusted tractor..
Rarest vehicle in the game
You get 2.1m dollars if you kill them all
pays thousands of dollars for a rusty ass tractor
I got both. How? I know you wanna know
I found a rusty tractor near the light house area north east in the map.
Would’ve loved this mission with Trevor
he would killed them
There should have been versions for Franklin and Trevor
@N-F Brothers subscribed.
Trevor isn't allowed to start the mission his ip banned and he's unsaveable
Yes how he would react about that😂
A moment of silence for all those who spent so much time on this missions just to get a rusty old tractor
same bruhh..
I didn’t know there was another way to do it 😭😭
How do you mean?
What do you mean?
@@harithzakwan1237 what do you mean?
"25 grand?! Jesus..."
*Seconds later.*
"Man, I love the internet."
Kifflom
@@لو3 kifflom
@@ItsVortex2796 kifflom stranger-brother
@@لو3 kifflom brother-father
@@لو3 Shut the f**ck up
Epsilon = Scientology
Jimmy Boston = Tom Cruise
No shit
We gotta get him out of the closet.
It's kinda like free masonry too
Joke=south park
You = Captain Obvious
When you spend $245.500 and you got $ 2,1 millon.
Did you account for the cars or every time he died
I didnt get any??
James Vincent Simagala well now I’m gonna start this mission
@@makii4772 rob the cars, steal the cash
I spend $400.000+ so i got only $1,7 million ptofit
This is a total satire of Scientology done GTA style. Getting supposed enlightenment drip-fed to you while also having to pay an increasing amount of money only to find out it is a giant scam.
So true! I thought the exact same thing. 💯
USA all over😳😲😂🤔
How I Felt doing these missions one big Scam,(Kept you in a Continuous pattern of Paying them),They were all Looney/Nutcases-Nut-jobs everything comes outta there mouth doesn't + Up=Making Sense I had a Laugh when I got a Call from a “Triggered” Cris still got the Ocelot left at the end of the Airplane Mission Near Fort Zancudo.
Who still knows Marnie as a broke and drug addicted young girl from Liberty City?
Ahh...
The memories
Wait what? ?
Stefan Donciu holy shit that is her😱
Thanks to Niko
i do
It's 2022 and I still feel weird about this
Sup Day same running the 5 miles in the desert
😪😪😪😪
dumbass
I found it in 2016 or 2017
ME TOO
Who also gets like a weird feeling from the epsilon soundtrack
Weird vibes
@@someguy8951 exactly
Woah i dunno bro maybe cause its suppossed to sound weird and evoke such feelings?
@@poke-champ4256 yes I know but do you understand the point that I am trying to make
I know the music is bullshit
What I find interesting about the Epsilon Program is that they think they know everything about life. They think they can trick Michael into making him believe in higher aspects of life and making him think he will gain wisdom with following the ways of the ones that are above. All of that just to scam him in the end. But here's the thing... Michael knew exactly what he was dealing with. He makes them think that he is a lost person, in search of a higher purpose, with zero experience. And the funny part of this is that Michael has more life-experience than all members of the Epsilon Program combined. He lived his whole life as a criminal and has dealt with much bigger threats and tricksters. He just wants to test himself. That's what I like so much about this.
Am I the only person who found it hilarious when Michael said " the spirits have email"
Well............
Yeah sorry
When he said "Okay, this is bullshit".
And back accounts and possess the ability to operate vehicles
He would've been so sarcastic with it.
@@francosleaze if I don't find you Mama Co-op
In my opinion, the fact that we were able to screw the Epsilon program after so many years of trying to uncover what it is, finding only dead ends and theories across all of the games for decades until GTA V came out... was the best gift Rockstar could've given us.
All that must be known about this program to enlightenment is…
Fuck them all for making me go through that shit and stealing all my hard earned money
Stop trying to be sentimental.
@@wetube6513 You're asking for too much man... sorry, I can't. The 2000's were the best, and still nowadays the relentless pass of time surprises me.
I leave these kind of comments because I feel like it, I apologize if they offend you, but I feel like it's the right thing to do.
@@Miguelnumbers Nah Man. I totally understand what you're talking about. As a matter of fact the farther we get away from the 80s the better they look.
@@maximvsdread1610 Every era has it's ups and downs, that's a fact. I may be from 2001, but I always thought both the 90's and 80's were the best time to be an American citizen, too bad I couldn't experience them.
Micheal’s cool attitude against the weirdness is hilarious
Section GamingPlus I know this is fucking it...the way Michael says that gets me every single time
I'm still playing as michael and I would take the money and take ths car and park it in his garage.
@@keithwilliams8623 His deadpan way of saying that line is hilarious
His best friend is Trevor.
Sorry late, but isn’t he should be the one who “too old” or “have no time” for this nonsense. Trevor should be the one who did this mission lol
I sent “Kifflom Brother Brother” to Scientology on Twitter and they blocked me.
😂 it was probably Tom Cruise who sent it cause they know epsilon program is making fun of them and they know they're frauds
😂 did they fr block you !?
I gotta do that
I feel bad for Michael to go through that shit. at least he gets a few million in the end.
Its a game...
He isn't Michael, he is Zondar!!!!!!
+Amazing Potato78 I thought the Lester missions were mandatory to continue the story so I already did them 😭
***** dang
beat the game 100% thats the point
Also when your wearing the robes for 10 days after each day Michael will start to say more weird stuff about orange trees
Is there any way of fasting the 10 days or do you just have to keep going to sleep
Jade no just sleep 40 times
YOU'RE
I'll have to test this now. If I didn't do it already.
He says
-Will these trees just shut up?
-Trees talk, but they're not very interesting.
-Oh brother, brother, brother. What have i gotten myself into?
-It ain't a cult, it ain't a cult, it ain't...A cult
-How do you know when you're ready but you're not ready, and ready all at once?
-You can't put a price on self-actualization. Actually you can, and i'm paying it
-Hey, i'm self-actualizing over here.
-I got a cloud empire in the planet and i'm a king, just like everyone else is.
-Maybe i'm so scabby, because i'm at 47.000 places at a time.
The most tedious is wearing their robes for ten days without switching characters. But it's so rewarding at the end when you blow them for 2.1 Millions.
No the running is the worst.
Canyon Storm Not really. I just went to Sandy Shores Airfield, bound my controller with some string, put some weight on the runbutton and just let him run in circles while I did some chores around my appartment.
Jakomi of the Rose Could I tape down the run button and the joystick and have him run around in circles, or no?
Chris stone You could. My brothers did that and it worked just as well.
Jakomi of the Rose Ok. I was just wondering.
Tips for the desert running:
1) the airfield is safe
2) tie up your controller to run in circles, make sure the run button is pressed.
Unless a Cougar comes and vores you.
Activate the fast run cheat
@@curiousmind_ then you won’t get the achievement doofus.
AIRFIELD IS NOT SAFE i had 4 miles and that creepy van showed up and that random ass dudd zapped my ass
@@stellar_wraith6449I thought only Trevor can get that encounter
Not a single ad in sight... i salute u sir
281th like
Dude you must have not actually read the bar since there is like 5
@@guitarlaughlin lol yep
400 :3
Dumb shit.
That epsilon music gives me chills
Darian Kalember I really like the music idk why
I first heard it in a Team Fortress 2 custom map, I was extremely confused when I played GTA V for the first time and heard it in a random radio station.
It sounds like the start of an Outro from a GTA V UA-camr.
it gives me anxiety.
So does the voice of Cris...but in a weird, soothing, ASMR kind of way. His voice is hot.
5:50
“You are ready,
But you’re not ready”
“Oh, I’m not ready”
“Then, you’re ready!”
“I don’t know about that...”
Kifflom.
Kifflom
Kifflom
Kifflom
This has got to be one of the grindiest overall completion. At a certain point you feel bad for them. But then, the leaders ultimately make you feel so used and scammy. The finale was oh so rewarding 😂😂😂😂
I spent about 3 hours looking for the Dinka Double just to find out that I always had it in my safe house garage
Shannon Kaneakua you can find it in the life invader parking lot
@@flake1401 thx
U can find a dinka any time at LifeInvaders office
lmao
I delivered a vehicle i bought (because I am lazy) and stole a motorcycle because my car wasn't there, and it was the dinka double lol
Idk what's more annoying
A) walking 20 miles
B) giving them your money
Or C) the sleeping for 10 days in that outfit
I accidentally shot a grenade launcher at 3 miles!!!
+khi coolblast D) saying kifflom 20thousand times
how many times do you need to get back to sleep for completing 10 days?
+sculas12 do u wait 24 hours irl or in game
All
For those who are wondering what is the Ultimate truth
Being robed without knowing..
@Kevin Garcia Lol🤣
I only did it for the outfit 🤣🤣
Thank you brother brother
I knew I was getting robbed once I wasted more than 500,000 dollars for everything so I stole the blue car in the last mission, got away Whit it and got 2 million dollars
you will never reach the truth
Loved this entire mission. Arguably the best and most entertaining mission in the game, IMO.
especially that 5 mile one :)
Seriously the mission with walking 5 miles on the desert is the stupidest mission in GTA history.
Exactly why it's a hidden mission
I am unsaveable :(
ahh, but father-brother, you do realize you can get a rubber band and tie around your thumb sticks and have the game do it yourself
RagEGhosTvideos itself*
+Such Boss *Uncle-brother
Kifflom was said: 957 times throughout this video
You probably don't have a life to count all of em...
Gotcha Man You watching this video prove that your life is just as pathetic as mine
***** Thank YOU!!!! It's a joke. These fuckers on the internet always have something to say about everything. Damn!
+Riyaadh Fakier Joke are supposed to be funny.
Gotcha Man like this? haha funny
I know that killing them gives you 2.1 million but... that tractor?
I can’t decide!
Help.
You can find the tractor as a special vehicle somewhere on the map
You can get something better with 2.1 million
@@mohmadnashirtai5970 no brother brother, your thesis is way too antithesis, therefore you're not enlightened
SaltyBoi UWU he is not ready.
Look athatdingo just kill all the creeps and get to the tractor, get in it and lose the cops but don't drive too far from the money. After u escaped the cops, go back to the money, get in that kifflom audi car, and you will get ur money automatically. Congratulations, u have both the money and the old ass tractor
I was 50% done with doing the desert run manually but I (for some reason) ACCIDENTALLY switched my character, and when I switched back, Michael's outfit changed, so I had to get back home and redress myself which led to a complete reset of my progress 💀 RIP
😂 happened to me
LOL! If Rockstar expected me to waste time running 5 miles then they were mistaken. I tied a rubber band to the left analog stick and taped the A button on my xbox controller and went on about my business like writing this comment.
Smart boy
broooo i was looking for easier ways to do the running part then i saw your comment lmfaoo thanks
I used the fast run cheat
TheVandrell Yes I recommend to anybody doing that part only when you’re bored and have nothing better to do lol
Same but dident tap A as still works walking
So it's safe to say that we can blame Niko for the fact that Marnie joined the epsilon program 😂😂
My dream was to play gta 4 but my pc is piece of sh*t it even run gta sa at 19 fps😭😭😁
@@norsazlinmat3459 lol u using library pc ?
@@snitch5976 no i mean with high graphic mod
@@snitch5976 i know your pc is luxury😂
@@norsazlinmat3459 fuck high graphic man just enjoy the game😂
I was once constipated for five days then I sat on the bowl and said " KIFFLOM" and the poop left me like a log jam flowing down river..KRAFT BE PRAISED.
zzzombie888 u must be joking lol😂😂🤣🤣
zzzombie888 let me try
zzzombie888 bwhahahahahahahah
zzzombie888 a la escuela de
zzzombie888 TWAS TRULY A MIRACLE!!!!!!!
If u still doing this , I have a tip for the running mission
Bring your AirPods case and stick it in the middle between R3 and L3 and put something heavy on the x and leave him run in circles by himself 0 effort 😁 or just hold x , or u can do it without holding x but it’s gonna take longer
I went to eat and came back all done 😁
Kifflom brothers 🤣😁
thanks for the idea
Thank you!And kifflom!
Damn dude I should’ve done this 🤦♂️
@@ChopperPlayed RIP fingers 💀
Thanks this saved me some time
Michael has the least amount of strangers and freaks because he had two secret ones that are unimaginably long as if this one is part of the story
Limbo Slam wait what is the other one i can only find kifflom plz answer im really curious
@@Puma8000 GTA 5 Abigail
@@Puma8000 there is a mission called What Lies Beneath that's is given to Michael by Abigail. In order to complete it, you have to purchase the Sonar Collections Dock.
Word of warning: You have to find submarine parts, and all you get out of it is a few dollars.
Don't waste your time.
@@sonnenblumefrau2048 not if you kill Abigail
@@sonnenblumefrau2048 That mission sucked ass, at least this one is interesting
45:20 “ride is too hot can’t customise it”
Kifflom
@Kemaal Deen-Elliswhen I finished the Epsilon story I kept it.I saw it as a limited item with an exclusive plaque.IDK man
my best friend at this Mission...the Taxi
lol same
me too, I was trying to complete the missions, but later I thought Fuck these missions, so annoying to complete :) . P.S. (I'm from Russia)
in Soviet Russia the mission fuck you instead
Pierre Theis lol me too
My name is jeff but he has to do it again and again the same thing again and again the only reason why he was the only person that was a father
I love how they casually started beating Michael saying "Kifflom" 😂😂
Kifflom!
Kifflom
Ur dad : u cheat on me ?
Ur mòm : kifflom
Kifflom brother brother
Kifflom
27:27 25 "grand? Jesus I mean kraff"
*buys* "man I love the internet"
lol
only a true yokel picks the tractor over the money
I picked the tractor because it's a rare vehicle :P I already have millions of dollars which I've earned through heists
Subidubidubi Du I got both by killing them with silenced weapons and then going downstairs to also grab the tractor.
Alex [ClashRoyale&GD] xD
I picked the tractor because I already have 2.1 billion dollars. I don’t need any more money at this point.
U do realise u can easily find the tractor at a lighthouse east of the map...
This was so tedious, but it’s a whole lot better than the stunt jumps
The stunt jumps are terrible
True af, i did a huge jump on the t20 and failed, did a tiny ass jump on the baller suv and passed, wtf?
All you have to do is miss going straight by less than a centimeter and it fails
@@benja-tp1sp Yeah,i like in every story (must complete/shortcut or alternative "chase" route) jump with Trevor,no matter how trashy i still complete it,but with a smooth,straight jump with my friggen 1mil Ztype,I fail.Fuck
For an unfit middle aged man, Michael has some decent endurance to be able to run the distance of 2/3 of the length of San Andreas
44:33 the only time GTA Series Videos has not gotten 100% gold on a mission.
E
@@dumbmonkey1313 r/whooosh
@@dumbmonkey1313 r/iamverysmart
Vulkan I’ll get you banned from UA-cam for that angry attitude
@@VictorFernandezBigdestroyer deal with it bucko
Imagine killing Michael and then stumbling across this video 😂😂🤦🏾♂️
basically me. Had to restart the story and barely have any money
Simon _T21 u killed michael?
@@filipd2910 yes unfortunately
I can't trust people who killed anyone of the protagonists you fake fucks.
It’s fine my 12 year old self can beat the story in under a week no prob
I would like to point out that the Epsilon program evaluation thing asked if you had red hair and a birthmark, if you play RDR2 a miscellaneous character named Francis Sinclair is a time traveller and he has red hair and a birthmark, Was Francis Sinclair planned during the making of GTA V that came out in 2013 and RDR2 came out in 2018 5 years later
I think the red hair and birthmark means that Francis is a descendant of their God or something
@@41_orizaferishpriyono99 yes he's a descendant of the Epsilon Programs god "Kraff"
It’s probably not planned. There’s a sort of stigma about people with red hair. People back in the day used to think they were psychic or something or they had some sort of spiritual abilities. Birth marks? Well I can see some sort of bullshit case being made that they’re like the mark of god or something. They probably just made something up in GTA and then used it later on in Red Dead as a little Easter egg.
I was 14 at the time of completing the achievement. I watched several videos including this one. I’m now 24 and I can’t believe a whole decade has passed. Where did the time go? Glad I was able to come back to this. THE MOST ODD MISSION IN GTA!!
No , Leonardo Johnson ...
Gta logic : Michael : *survives 10 gunshots to the abdomen*
Also Michael : *gets incapacitated by a kick to the stomach and a blow to the head*
I guess his plot armor disappeared
That was a kick to the balls...
that was a kick to the balls, that would have knocked any man out
@@kasper7574 he got balls of steel
The bullets didn’t do as much damage to his abdomen because he has several layers of fat rolls to protect it.
Fun fact: Marnie is also a stranger in gta 4
Really🤔
@Jokūbas Varanauskas kifflom brother brother
@@gregjau8367 من
The fall of a scammer is when they start believing in their own scam
The crazy part being this can be attatched to lots of organizations
You're the greatest in making these videos no talk at all but all clear love your videos keep it up
Man, he loves the internet.
These missions got me saying kifflom in my sleep 💀
Same
Headass
Morbidpie that got dark
Morbidpie kifflom brother, brother
Kifflom,
3:00 Punched Michael so hard it changed his hairstyle
Didnt change dumbass
He gay
@@nbalivemobileplug6115 bruh you're a bitch
Didn’t change
xJv_GhoST Your a skank
9 Years later ant still helps, thanks man!
The music fucked my brain.
I know it's really annoying
The music is a beautiful lullaby
It gave me a headache
I'm at the hospital right NOW Because of this song
+Furkan Tanrıverdi lol same
I love how it’s referencing
Tom Cruise (Jimmy Boston)
And The crazy cult of Scientology
(Epsilon Program)
Lol
😂😂😂
Rockstar r 🐐🐐🐐!!!
In Fallout 2 they called him Juan Cruz and Nicole Kidman, Vikki Goldman.
I always thought they were illuminati (an evil cult founded decades ago)
Michael is cursing at us players for doing this mission 😂
27:25 "25 grand! Jesus! I mean Kraff!" Funniest line!
When i played GTA 4 somoene on the radio actually said Kifflom and i was like wtf
And the woamen is from gta 4 srry for my bad english if i said wrong
Which station?
@@albert1587 yeah Marnie
Actually, Cris Formage himself is on gta sa Wctr radio
@@TheExtreme800 yep
How the hell are you supposed to complete this without any help or guide from internet.
The game never tells about this side mission.
@Sibgatک I did it 4 years ago without any help
SAMYAK How did you find the cars tho
Yeah it did when your loading up story mode
@@angelinablanco5138 they give you pictures of the places to go
@@uoos526 I've made a ritual of killing the cultists in front of the Epsilon building everyday.
Hope you guys know that Marnie also previously appeared in GTA IV as a encounter.
Really?
@@Louis-sq5mn Yeah, she used to be a heroin addict in Liberty City
Yeah, she was a drug addict in the last game..they really got her character down in GTA 5...she has really wide eyes and a strange demeanor which is exactly how a past heroin addict acts.. also considering Kifflom which is mocking Scientology.. reels people in who are vulnerable, and make it seem like they are there to “help” them.. helping them get through the loss of a family member, helping them get off drugs...by paying the cult large amounts of money:.so once these people trade their sorrows for Scientology (kifflom) they believe it is a part of them, because it really helped them get through a hard time, and it tugs on their emotions making them stay in the organization.
Oh damn 🤭
Considered how they dealed with Johnny Klebitz and United Liberty Paper, Marnie at least got luckuy. Yes, she is from scientology, but got free from heroin.
can we just take a moment and appreciate how much effort was put into this video
_Come to Vinewood for the real truth. But first that'll be 500 dollars please._
dlc in a nutshell
EA in a nutshell
DRaafa E.M. Damn it you beat me to
Facts😅😭
Gta online updates in a nutshell
Everything is in a nutshell nowadays
Teacher:from now on, do you understand?
The students:Yes
Me:KIFFLOM!
Ha ha ha
Teacher: Kifflom
You: shocked Pikachu
هلو
7 years later still doing it!
Kifflom
How
0w0 i look at my text and this took me a hour
Kifflom
Marnie won’t spawn for me
if you're stuck on the wear the robe for 10 days part, just keep blowing yourself up. it'll tell you when you're at the 7 days part, then you'll finish. it just takes a bit of time
That’s literally where I’m at right now and I keep blowing myself up with grenades. edit: Never mind it worked
but you lose money in the process, no?
@@seanambrose7051 yeah around 120k$
Michael:
Epsilon:
Michael:
Epsilon: *Donations*
That profile pic just suits the comment perfectly.🤣🤣🤣
Chris : “I make or break Vinewood careers”
Michael : “Well my career is robbing banks, don’t see how you can “break” that”
Late reply, but, depending on where you are in the story, Michael has ties to Solomon, a known Vinewood movie producer. I'm sure Cris might find ways to make Michael pay, the same way Devon Weston tried to.
"AND IM STUCK TALKING TO YOU BECAUSE NO ONE ELSE GIVES A SH*T. OH, IM LIVING A DREAM, BABY. AND THAT DREAM IS F*CKED IT IS. FFFFF*KING F*CKED"
- Michael to Chris
Chris: I break Vinewood careers!
Micheal: And I break vaults and both greedy and scammer pockets
I dunno but that reminded me when CJ stole Salvatore's casino and then he threaten him the same way
Michael-epsilon program (because favorite color is blue)
Trevor-altruist cult(country person)
Franklin-sons of the mountains(gang color green)
Franklin also be chasing down bigfoot
The Epsilon Centre is by Michael's house and the Children of the Mountin Centre is by Franklin's original house. Trevor just likes hikers so was bound to meet the Alturists at some point.
I like the fact the the radio at played Saturday night’s alright for fighting at the end of the right way.😂 48:39
Even better, he forgot to turn the radio off like he usually does.
9:27 My reaction when i saw the Kifflom Achievement
But why?
@@fathergabrielstokes4706 its too long
GB Atomic that’s what she said
😂😂😂
@@darkmosii giggity
I wonder what Niko's reaction would be like when he sees how Marnie changed after he saved her lmao
Well atleast she is not an junkie. Thats all he cares.
I FKING THINK THE SAME
"According to her Bleeter account, part of her duties in the Epsilon Program, is to sleep with gay movie stars to convince them they're straight."(gta wiki)
LOL
LOL
LOL
LOL
Bellic Bowlin
Bellic Bowling q
I was already wandering the dessert for 4.8 miles and then some ocelot killed me and i died and then the epsilon outfit was reset to michael’s normal gray suit. So in order to equip the epsilon robes, i have to go to michael’s house which of course, made me do the whole wandering around again
I feel ur pain bro
I got kidnapped by a hill billy and stripped on a train track
@Cow exactly what happened to me
@Cow lmfao
What happens if you carrying a gun while wandering?
Love that ending. It is such a poetic irony to scam a scammer. Kifflom!
That's what they should do to scientology scam the scammer
Michel: runs 0.1 miles "Kifflom, Kifflom, kilfflom
Subtitles: give up, give up, give up
Very true.. annotations even telling him to quit the cult.
@Y8KK0 [ɢᴜɴ ꜱᴇᴘᴛɪᴍ] LOLOL XD
Kifflom!
Wow at 16:27 sounds like the radio is talking about Coronavirus. "A super bacteria that will wipe out mankind, start sanitizing" lol.
Lol true
Coronavirus is a virus not a bacteria lmao...
@@276KittyGirl nobody said the contrary. Plus it's not Coronavirus, it's Mediavirus if you know what I mean.
Did rockstar pull a simpsons
@@Grimlock_king85 yes they did
To be honest I really hated this mission for how long it takes to finish it from the running 5 miles to wearing the outfit for 10 days while being idle
You can speed up the process on wearing the outfit by constantly going to sleep until enough days have passed
@@eddiediaz5518 ty for the help
Ingame days or irl days?
@@eddiediaz5518 does it work if trevor sleeps cuz he sleeps 12 hours
@@hydrocon3 this mission is only available with Michael
I actually do want to know more about The Epsilon Program and about Cris to see where he came from and how he started to believe in all this Kifflom stuff.
2 years but it's basically how Scientology works you do a personality test and they brainwash you and shit and you have to pay em and you are stuck signing a contract
I haven't played it, but there's a reference in RDR2
take me to my father-father, brother-uncle kifflom
peace brother-brother *knocks you out*
Kifflom *beat you up*
Kifflom Rockstar for giving us another 2.1million in this side quest.
Kifflom
Kifflom brother- brother
Kifflom!!
kifflom
Unless they don't actually tell you to steal the money so you miss it and then you uninstall game.
Lazlow: You guys were roaming around and chanting lip balm
Chris: It's kifflom.
Lazlow: Whatever both sounds ridiculous to me.
Remember Gta Sa radio wctr
Epsilon is part of gta ever since and now we can even find an Easter egg in RDR2, mybe rock star has a big plan for that cult
“Un-know it, and you’ll know.”
“Look, can you just know it for me so we can move this thing along?”
I'm surprised Micheal had the patience to get this far. Especially the 5 mile walk in the desert.
Hello can I ask is this mission is free?
Yes, its free!
I won a triathlon with him being a 40 yr old smoker so...
6:51
Everyone: kifflom
Michael: okay?👀
Marnie epsilon name is Shupar
Shupar, remember the portuguese word: Chupar
Chupar means: Suck
Suck = Succ
Succ is Dead, No Succ
ilormenati cunfermid
Stoopid Stuff lol
Stoopid Stuff It actually means "to suck", in the sense of sucking something from a straw or, y'know, sucking dick. :D
Chris never did anything. All he did was he wasted Michael's time and stole $90,500, but in the end Michael took his refund $2,100,000. That's a good choice, I agree.
The best thing about this mission is it's a long con worth putting up with until the moment you can finally take their money and your frustration out on them with a bazooka.
I cant get past "kifflom" *whack*
and then Michael just sounds disappointed in himself, like dude I cant handle this
Effort saving tip: instead of running through the desert just hold sprint and turn and spin around in a circle while doing somet else on ur phone. Thats what im doing right now
Finlx Productions legends r saying he still runs in circles
It works. Doing that now lol
do you get a email that lets you do the third mission or do you have to do something on the website because im not getting email
Another thing I love about GTA 5 besides the crimes, killings, characters, and missions is the computer mouse thing giving you the finger 😂