Narcissistic parents have a significant impact on their children, as they unknowingly train them to become codependent and remain trapped in narcissistic relationships. These parents possess a self-centered and inflated sense of importance, often neglecting the emotional needs of their children. Consequently, children raised by narcissistic parents are conditioned to prioritize the needs of others before their own, leading to codependent tendencies. These individuals tend to find themselves caught in toxic relationships with narcissistic partners, perpetuating the cycle of unhealthy dynamics. It is essential to recognize these patterns and work towards breaking free from the codependency and establishing healthier relationships.
Story of my life. It makes me assume that people who're in relationships with them come from a similar dynamic. When you awaken, you don't only "know" but fully understand and finally see clearly.
Narcissistic parenting creates codependents and narcissists. Often the golden child develops narcissistic tendencies while the scapegoat becomes codependent.
@@ecwilliams777yep for sure. any parent who prevents their child from developing a sense of self can’t pull the ignorant card. They know they just don’t care.
I agree 💯. My narcissistic parent is literally trying to convince me to give a narcissistic ex another chance after finally breaking free. This is so toxic.
I’ve had to live with my narc parents my entire life, because I developed some health issues over the years which have prevented me from being able to work a lot and support myself. So there has been a truly practical element to all of this, where I simply don’t have the financial resources to be able to get out of this situation. But I can’t tell you how many rude remarks I’ve gotten from “friends” who didn’t get it, and who simply saw me as making the “poor life choice” to be codependent. The judgments and criticisms from others have taken on a life of their own, and have become a form of abuse in themselves.
@@janeylynn5934this your login. I noticed that people who have chosen their account name using russian letters now have a gibberish for a username akin to ramdomly generated password.
I can relate and empathize. I wonder how many of us who were raised & abused by narcissists developed serious health problems??? I believe that chronic stress and a chronic negative, shame-based inner dialogue in my head directly contributed to, if not caused, my health issues. I too have been financially dependent on my abusive parent for years now. It's a very upsetting position to be in because at this point I doubt my ability to ever get out of it or out from under their control. It gets discouraging feeling like the inner healing is never done, but it's only been very recently that I better understood it. Up until then I just blamed myself for everything, as usual. I believe there is always hope and I will keep trying! Wishing you all the best with your health and everything else in your current circumstances!!!❤
@@XOXOX4242 Yes, yes, and yes! Everything you said is spot on. Our experiences sound very similar. Like, you, I doubt that I will ever have a chance to escape from this situation. And how can a person really heal if they never have a chance to escape the abuse? I’m sorry that you’ve had to deal with these things, too. I wish you the very best!
@@kobra4422 Thanks for your kind remarks. It really does seem like no one understands my particular situation, except for a few people like you. If I could afford therapy, I would definitely go. I wish you all the best.
I fully concur with your assessment. What’s worse is that we behave codependently with everybody we come in contact with. Even the so-called “good” people start to see us some type of way. When we erase who we are, other people will do the same because we have made ourselves invisible to the world; but the predatory narcissist takes full advantage of our tendency to be codependent, and is all to willing to attack and aggress upon innocent, unsuspecting targets because they are by nature very insecure people.
Exactly - it creates a template through which we live and enter relationships with. And sooooo true- if we act invisible... people see us as invisible!!! BUT when WE see ourselves.... others begin seeing us too!!!! The ones unwilling to do so - we are better off without them!
Thank you for this brilliant video Michelle. It is so true. When you had narcisistic parents your authenticity was a kryptonite to them. You had to suppress it and they forced you to be codependent. If you laughted, they punished you because they did not want to see you happy and not an extension of themselves which was mostly angry and miserable. So recovery means coming back to our authenticity - Yes Absolutely the case. God bless you❤
True. My mother was miserable and she has always made my life miserable. Every time I found something that I liked and made me happy, she would assure to take it away from me.
This REALLY resonated with me. I specifically remember a time, when my mother literally told me to please stop doing what I was doing in the moment. What I was doing was I was telling a girl that I liked Domo Kun, a Japanese character, I was expressing how much I like that character and how excited I was at finding someone with similar tastes. She told me to please stop embarrassing her. In that moment I became so sad, I became so quiet, and I immediately stopped showing my true self in that moment, because I didn't want to further upset her.
My ex who is not my children's father, is a high spectrum narcissist he taught my 2 year old at the time that she wasn't allowed to cry, she had to hide in the bathroom anytime she felt upset. He also brain washed her to cater to him by playing doctor,serving him food drinks, tickle him, love him ect. He'd play dead to see her respond or that a monster was attacking him. It actually traumatized her. Once I learned what this was I put a stop to it. She's 11 now and has healed. I'm so thankful for your help.
I got rebeaten if I was heard crying from the beating I just got without any explanation as to why. By 7 I cry but no sound, just tears. When sound could cry no tears flowed. Parents ...
@@DrPhilGoode let's pray that she's not still his prey bc it was the evil smirk while telling me I was no man's equal, how could I possibly think I could ever be seen as an equal to my sibling... @85 my mom is sudoku smart but her old part timers selective hearing/understanding kicks in if it's about me
Wow……..no one has ever explained that to me ….I was so upset at what the Narrcissts was doing to me that I had no idea that I came in with my own co- dependency. It’s time for me to heal from this trauma bonding relationship. Thank you for your insight .
So glad the information helped!!! Once we begin healing that inner template soooo much changes!! Wishing you the best on your recovery journey =D. If you ever need help make sure you check out Thrivers School of Transformation - we meet live on zoom each week and we do the inner work together!! I'll leave the link here for you to check out to see if it might be a good fit for you: www.micheleleenieves.com/offers/VyRwuCuF
Thanks Michele for pointing out the disdain some people have for codependents. I've noticed people seem to be much less kind and supportive than they used to be. I recently saw a video on here from a so called awakened channel about abandoning people in times of distress 'because they learn to self soothe.' Self soothing is important but human support, love, friendship and connectedness is absolutely essential. I've been feeling so abandoned and disappointed by people who were meant to be in my support network lately. I find most people would rather do anything that be present with another person's sadness. The one sided friendship part REALLY resonated with me because I supported people through their rock bottom times, their massive breakups and now none of these people are there for me. It's been extremely confusing and painful the way so called friends acted disgusted towards me in times of need rather than supportive.
I remember that from 6-12 yrs i use to wake up cranky and winey and i dont know why but my mother wld tease me about it and i wld end up crying and she would call me too sensitive.
Spot on! I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with me. I worked on unhealthy behaviors, was aware of the type of people I attracted, etc. But! I had absolutely no idea why. Until I did. Finding out my mothers diagnosis was a huge relief. Finally, I could get some answers and start working on issues. I could give up the hope of developing a relationship with her. On a sidenote, may I request and or suggest that you don’t do the zoom in zoom out with the video. I would completely lose focus and have to back up a few seconds. I tell you this because you are a rockstar, and I want you to be successful or I should say more successful! You are saving lives. Thank you so much! 🙏🏼💕
They're stellar at recruiting family members (younger than you) to continue the abuse after the are long gone. They make them promise to continue the abuse and isolation.
I think the condition should be renamed. It gives off the wrong idea. Same as Antisocial Personality Disorder. When my sister first called me it without explanation, I was insulted and immediately rejected the concept. I pride myself on independence and not needing anything. A few years later realizing my sister behaves covertly narcissistic, that moment still sits with me. I see all the guidance, advice, and support for what it was. My codependency with her was useful until it wasn't.
You are 100%. I've been trying to get out. Its been rough. But i know I'm going doing it. Im looking into joining your group! Thanks for your mind its very intriguing. Appreciate your understanding.
Thanks & good job! I'm a recovering codependent. I'm learning and applying what I learn, but it's a long hard process. Is it possible to be completely independent (authentic)? It seems that codependency is baked into our culture (wage slavery).
Hi!! Yes... it sure is a long process, we're uprooting things that have been indented right down to our dna. But to answer your question.... yes - you CAN go from codependency to authenticity. It takes doing the inner work though, there's no short cuts - but it's worth it!! If you ever need help - you should check out our live weekly zoom meetings. I meet with people from all over the world and we do the hard, inner work together!!
And my brother use to pick on me alot when i was little, kick me at the dinner table, pinch me or make faces and i would whine and tell on him and instead of him getting in trouble i was told to stop whining.
Yeah i didnt like that, she would pick on me for waking up cranky and she would mimic me whining instead of consoling. She wasnt good at empathy as a child
Doctor who=imagen each episode is some1 doing social fighting, but the doctor is actuelly alone, then the regenerate is a meltdown, except its the enemies trying to help you for the regenerate when they did it, and then they keep doing it, and they still assume... you actuelly care about what. they. say. they do the epic fail gaslighting, they assume i care what they say, im just still ignoreing them.
Thank you for making this insightful video! Recovering from codependency and getting out narcissistic relationships is never an easy task -- and the healing journey is a very non-linear process! It requires time and kindness toward oneself, it can also be an isolating process! ❤🩹
Narcissistic parents have a significant impact on their children, as they unknowingly train them to become codependent and remain trapped in narcissistic relationships. These parents possess a self-centered and inflated sense of importance, often neglecting the emotional needs of their children. Consequently, children raised by narcissistic parents are conditioned to prioritize the needs of others before their own, leading to codependent tendencies. These individuals tend to find themselves caught in toxic relationships with narcissistic partners, perpetuating the cycle of unhealthy dynamics. It is essential to recognize these patterns and work towards breaking free from the codependency and establishing healthier relationships.
Story of my life. It makes me assume that people who're in relationships with them come from a similar dynamic. When you awaken, you don't only "know" but fully understand and finally see clearly.
I think they do it KNOWINGLY
Narcissistic parenting creates codependents and narcissists. Often the golden child develops narcissistic tendencies while the scapegoat becomes codependent.
@@ecwilliams777yep for sure. any parent who prevents their child from developing a sense of self can’t pull the ignorant card. They know they just don’t care.
I agree 💯. My narcissistic parent is literally trying to convince me to give a narcissistic ex another chance after finally breaking free. This is so toxic.
I’ve had to live with my narc parents my entire life, because I developed some health issues over the years which have prevented me from being able to work a lot and support myself. So there has been a truly practical element to all of this, where I simply don’t have the financial resources to be able to get out of this situation. But I can’t tell you how many rude remarks I’ve gotten from “friends” who didn’t get it, and who simply saw me as making the “poor life choice” to be codependent. The judgments and criticisms from others have taken on a life of their own, and have become a form of abuse in themselves.
By the way, on a side note, does anyone know why so many of us commenting on youtube videos suddenly have a bunch of numbers after our names??
@@janeylynn5934this your login. I noticed that people who have chosen their account name using russian letters now have a gibberish for a username akin to ramdomly generated password.
I can relate and empathize. I wonder how many of us who were raised & abused by narcissists developed serious health problems??? I believe that chronic stress and a chronic negative, shame-based inner dialogue in my head directly contributed to, if not caused, my health issues. I too have been financially dependent on my abusive parent for years now. It's a very upsetting position to be in because at this point I doubt my ability to ever get out of it or out from under their control. It gets discouraging feeling like the inner healing is never done, but it's only been very recently that I better understood it. Up until then I just blamed myself for everything, as usual. I believe there is always hope and I will keep trying!
Wishing you all the best with your health and everything else in your current circumstances!!!❤
@@XOXOX4242 Yes, yes, and yes! Everything you said is spot on. Our experiences sound very similar. Like, you, I doubt that I will ever have a chance to escape from this situation. And how can a person really heal if they never have a chance to escape the abuse? I’m sorry that you’ve had to deal with these things, too. I wish you the very best!
@@kobra4422 Thanks for your kind remarks. It really does seem like no one understands my particular situation, except for a few people like you. If I could afford therapy, I would definitely go. I wish you all the best.
I fully concur with your assessment. What’s worse is that we behave codependently with everybody we come in contact with. Even the so-called “good” people start to see us some type of way. When we erase who we are, other people will do the same because we have made ourselves invisible to the world; but the predatory narcissist takes full advantage of our tendency to be codependent, and is all to willing to attack and aggress upon innocent, unsuspecting targets because they are by nature very insecure people.
Exactly - it creates a template through which we live and enter relationships with. And sooooo true- if we act invisible... people see us as invisible!!! BUT when WE see ourselves.... others begin seeing us too!!!! The ones unwilling to do so - we are better off without them!
@@FromSurvivingToThriving Bullseye 🎯
Thank you for this brilliant video Michelle. It is so true. When you had narcisistic parents your authenticity was a kryptonite to them. You had to suppress it and they forced you to be codependent. If you laughted, they punished you because they did not want to see you happy and not an extension of themselves which was mostly angry and miserable. So recovery means coming back to our authenticity - Yes Absolutely the case. God bless you❤
True. My mother was miserable and she has always made my life miserable. Every time I found something that I liked and made me happy, she would assure to take it away from me.
This REALLY resonated with me. I specifically remember a time, when my mother literally told me to please stop doing what I was doing in the moment. What I was doing was I was telling a girl that I liked Domo Kun, a Japanese character, I was expressing how much I like that character and how excited I was at finding someone with similar tastes. She told me to please stop embarrassing her. In that moment I became so sad, I became so quiet, and I immediately stopped showing my true self in that moment, because I didn't want to further upset her.
My ex who is not my children's father, is a high spectrum narcissist he taught my 2 year old at the time that she wasn't allowed to cry, she had to hide in the bathroom anytime she felt upset. He also brain washed her to cater to him by playing doctor,serving him food drinks, tickle him, love him ect. He'd play dead to see her respond or that a monster was attacking him. It actually traumatized her. Once I learned what this was I put a stop to it. She's 11 now and has healed. I'm so thankful for your help.
Thank you for being a good mother and protecting your child.
I got rebeaten if I was heard crying from the beating I just got without any explanation as to why. By 7 I cry but no sound, just tears. When sound could cry no tears flowed. Parents
...
How long was he active in her life after that?
@@DrPhilGoode let's pray that she's not still his prey bc it was the evil smirk while telling me I was no man's equal, how could I possibly think I could ever be seen as an equal to my sibling... @85 my mom is sudoku smart but her old part timers selective hearing/understanding kicks in if it's about me
@@keithstewart7514 the question was to the original comment.
So true! You against You. We are our own worst enemy...
Thank you for your wise insights, Michelle!
Wow……..no one has ever explained that to me ….I was so upset at what the Narrcissts was doing to me that I had no idea that I came in with my own co- dependency. It’s time for me to heal from this trauma bonding relationship. Thank you for your insight .
So glad the information helped!!! Once we begin healing that inner template soooo much changes!! Wishing you the best on your recovery journey =D. If you ever need help make sure you check out Thrivers School of Transformation - we meet live on zoom each week and we do the inner work together!! I'll leave the link here for you to check out to see if it might be a good fit for you: www.micheleleenieves.com/offers/VyRwuCuF
I was called too sensitive a lot, ecspecially when i wined or cried.
Thanks Michele for pointing out the disdain some people have for codependents. I've noticed people seem to be much less kind and supportive than they used to be. I recently saw a video on here from a so called awakened channel about abandoning people in times of distress 'because they learn to self soothe.' Self soothing is important but human support, love, friendship and connectedness is absolutely essential. I've been feeling so abandoned and disappointed by people who were meant to be in my support network lately. I find most people would rather do anything that be present with another person's sadness. The one sided friendship part REALLY resonated with me because I supported people through their rock bottom times, their massive breakups and now none of these people are there for me. It's been extremely confusing and painful the way so called friends acted disgusted towards me in times of need rather than supportive.
I remember that from 6-12 yrs i use to wake up cranky and winey and i dont know why but my mother wld tease me about it and i wld end up crying and she would call me too sensitive.
Spot on! I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with me. I worked on unhealthy behaviors, was aware of the type of people I attracted, etc. But! I had absolutely no idea why. Until I did. Finding out my mothers diagnosis was a huge relief. Finally, I could get some answers and start working on issues. I could give up the hope of developing a relationship with her.
On a sidenote, may I request and or suggest that you don’t do the zoom in zoom out with the video. I would completely lose focus and have to back up a few seconds. I tell you this because you are a rockstar, and I want you to be successful or I should say more successful! You are saving lives. Thank you so much! 🙏🏼💕
They're stellar at recruiting family members (younger than you) to continue the abuse after the are long gone. They make them promise to continue the abuse and isolation.
Thank you for the hug 🤗 😘my flour tortilla.I had the best version of you during the smear campaign.
Very good Explanation
I having been watching your channel for years. You look amazing. You truly looked healed. Radiant.
I think the condition should be renamed. It gives off the wrong idea. Same as Antisocial Personality Disorder.
When my sister first called me it without explanation, I was insulted and immediately rejected the concept. I pride myself on independence and not needing anything. A few years later realizing my sister behaves covertly narcissistic, that moment still sits with me. I see all the guidance, advice, and support for what it was. My codependency with her was useful until it wasn't.
I think is Rosenberg who calls it self esteem deficit disorder or something like that. I agree the term sounds denigrating.
@@Lyrielonwind yes, I believe it is Rosenberg. "Self-love deficit disorder" which is much more accurate.
Changing that. No more. Great unpacking. Thank you.
Yes would like more info on this because Narc parents and codependent parents train you to "accept" abusive workplaces and toxic relationships.
You are 100%. I've been trying to get out. Its been rough. But i know I'm going doing it.
Im looking into joining your group!
Thanks for your mind its very intriguing. Appreciate your understanding.
Im putting my abusive narc mother in the most abusive nursing home possible.
🎉
Thanks & good job! I'm a recovering codependent. I'm learning and applying what I learn, but it's a long hard process. Is it possible to be completely independent (authentic)? It seems that codependency is baked into our culture (wage slavery).
Hi!! Yes... it sure is a long process, we're uprooting things that have been indented right down to our dna. But to answer your question.... yes - you CAN go from codependency to authenticity. It takes doing the inner work though, there's no short cuts - but it's worth it!! If you ever need help - you should check out our live weekly zoom meetings. I meet with people from all over the world and we do the hard, inner work together!!
And my brother use to pick on me alot when i was little, kick me at the dinner table, pinch me or make faces and i would whine and tell on him and instead of him getting in trouble i was told to stop whining.
Yeah i didnt like that, she would pick on me for waking up cranky and she would mimic me whining instead of consoling. She wasnt good at empathy as a child
Thanks for your amazing work! It has helped me so much. Where can I learn more about the coaching certification program?
Thank you for the video Alyssa Milano, my big question always is, how do we know the extent we were parented , how do we recall being 3 years old
Normal people can hide memories too?
"The Narcissist Monkey Haters".... My future bands new name!!!😂
Michele - How does therapy connect with the client’s spiritual nature for healing and wholeness? Do you believe it’s necessary? What is your approach?
Doctor who=imagen each episode is some1 doing social fighting,
but the doctor is actuelly alone,
then the regenerate is a meltdown,
except its the enemies trying to help you for the regenerate when they did it,
and then they keep doing it,
and they still assume... you actuelly care about what. they. say.
they do the epic fail gaslighting,
they assume i care what they say,
im just still ignoreing them.
id let you walk me on a leash ❤😊what what
Thank you for making this insightful video! Recovering from codependency and getting out narcissistic relationships is never an easy task -- and the healing journey is a very non-linear process! It requires time and kindness toward oneself, it can also be an isolating process! ❤🩹