Your husband is one in a million. He's got to be the most understanding man on the planet. He's so unusual. He's a keeper. I think it's awesome that you love each other so deeply and have found a way to make your marriage work.
I married into a morman family. I longed to be one so that I was fully accepted. At age 14 I accepted Jesus as my Savior. I did not come from a Christian ( born again) home. I went to a Christian camp and Jesus was introduced to me. Im so grateful I accepted Him. When I took the lessons my inner spirit knew that this was a cult. I never became a morman but love the family I married into. How I wish Id heard this young lady when I was 20. Im now 72 and grateful for many of your guests. I live in South Africa and strangely your program has validated me for that decision I made 52 years ago. My husband left the morman church but so much makes sense through your program. Thank you.
Hi Lauren, I’m not religious but have just come to Mormon stories after watching John interview Chris Shelton re his Scientology experiences and your story is the first one I have listened to. I am fascinated by the psychology of religions. I seldom comment on videos but just wanted to say how impressed I am with your courage in telling your story and also with you as a person. I’m sure hearing your experiences will be helpful to many people on many levels. I found it inspiring. You come across as a wonderful human being and your daughter is so fortunate to have two such thoughtful and caring parents. With every good wish for your future happiness.
I feel that my mormon experience is so much different than most females raised in the church..they were all so dedicated to the church (being obedient, missions,, BYU, etc) and here I was at 7 years old thinking and feeling that something wasn't right about mormonism..but no one would listen to me..
I relate to you. Even as a baby, I felt like there wasn’t something right about the church, yet I was seen as the “disobedient child”. My sister on the other hand, always followed the church, and was therefore seen as the “golden child”.
What is sad is that this lady lost her faith in God for good. She is not blaming humans for telling her lies and her family. This world is not perfect, but God does exist. So to me, I can’t understand how your brain light up and you don’t find the real God, the one that despised everything, do love us. Yes, the Old Testament is quite crazy, there is a lots of blood shredding, but God is just and he will see us through everything in this life. I have to admit it that many times I do get sad about how I was raised, and how I dream of a perfect life and perfect ending. But based in Jesus death, that’s not the case. And it is the church that do that to us, they do say it, came to Jesus and your life will be better, blessed and blah blah blah. Right now, I am not having answer to many of my questions, but I do believe God is God, if he wants to answer me he will, and if he doesn’t, he doesn’t. God still going to be God after I am gone. There is a lots of suffering in this life, then the next will be happiness. Now, I do not accept that blindly, because I did had other experiences with God, that I can’t denied. It is quite disturbing that they studied that much, enough to learn Joseph Smith wasn’t a prophet, but didn’t got to the bottom line of who is God, and Jesus. Other curious think is most of people that cares to this podcast are bissexual or gay. It makes me wonder, what forces are behind this deconstructions. May God bless them all to find happiness and Gods truly love.
Suffering or challenge helps us grow. Isn’t about being good or not. Our value is immeasurable in Gods eyes. That’s where the misconception is. It’s completely our choice to have faith in Christ or not and follow him. As Christ said no man is good except God even speaking of himself. I don’t think Christ wants us to focus on ego boosting things like am I good or not. We need to separate our value from our actions.
What an amazingly brave couple. If only all married couples had their level of honesty, communication & commitment, or even half their level, how much “true happiness” could come from that?! Thanks for sharing so much with us. I believe hearing your story will help many many people.
I really appreciate this episode. I think it's fine to recognize that a marriage works for now and to understand it might not always look the same and it can always be reevaluated as needed. Divorce can be healthy and even beautiful if you are able to see when a marriage isn't working before contempt sets in.
OMG.... Best "Mormon Story" ever...... This one pushed me to finally join MS and contribute a pittance of what I have received over the many, many months I cruise in and out of amazing content.
To me this is pretty straightforward: She's a lesbian who also has the capacity of falling in love with men but doesn't like sex with them, and she fell in love with a man. Because of that love, she wants to stay married and make it work. But lesbians like that are like unicorns; you can't base your life on the hope that you are one of those. Also, she was pretty open about feeling free to morph the marriage into whatever is best for them. I don't think that would be compatible with most "pray the gay away" people.
I am listening to this video on my husband's account. This is one of the best shows that I have seen and I have learned so much. I am 60 years old and I have a daughter that is 40 today. My husband passed away from cancer Nov.2021.I had so many of the same feelings in my life. I feel like now I am too old to explore that. It's just great to know that I'm not wrong for having these feelings. Thankyou for being authentic and just being yourself. I know that God is loving and merciful. Mankind has turned Christianity into just being religious and bound by there ways. Mans ways are not God's ways.We can never be perfect.I will strive to live the rest of my life just being happy 😊
Lauren what a very powerful and beautiful message about happiness! Grateful for your bravery and willingness to share your story! Another wonderful podcast! I left the church 25 years ago and didn't realize I was still in need of healing. This podcast has helped me with my path immensely!
This a absolutely one of your best stories. I admire Laura for putting her story out there. She will have no idea how many people that she has helped with her openness. Watching from Edmonton, Alberta. 2:03:28
Such a great interview. I'm not Mormon but grew up in a Penticostal church that lead with fear and obedience. So many similarities. I left when I was 18 but it wasn't until my mid 30s that I realised that if God was real, then he is the most narcissistic being ever and has no love for anyone. Thankyou for doing these interviews. It helps many of us contthe healing process years after leaving the church
Wow this is such an incredible episode! You guys did such a great job with both parts of this. Packed full of information about why people who are very faithful leave the church. I applaude you all. So grateful to John for creating a place for people to tell their stories. It's invaluable!
"Losing belief in God and Jesus" This section resonates so much. I don't think I realized how much I wanted that love from a heavenly being until it was gone. My mom died 6 days before I went into the MTC as a 19 yr old. I think in a weird way I found in heavenly father's love, that motherly love that I had lost. In Jesus I found the unconditional love of someone who has your back no matter what. Just like you Lauren, my deconstruction in Mormonism really started in a deconstruction of the God I was raised to believe in. When, at 36 yrs old, I finally was able to accept the conclusions I had come to, it really did feel identical to how it was when I lost my mom. It was the same kind of grief. To add to that, I also had to deal with losing my mom again because now the dream of seeing her when I died had collapsed. Add on to that the crushing devastation of not being with my wife or kids in the next life. Even though I don't believe in hell anymore, during this time in my life, I was there. I spent a lot of time there in fact. The doctrine of eternal families is so beautifully comforting when you're in. Especially if you've lost someone you love. But when you lose that, it becomes as painful as it was comforting.
The doctrine of Eternal families is called comforting, but is truly terrorizing. I used to have a night terror as a young child that I had broken the sealing of my whole family by making a wrong choice, and I didn't know what that choice was. Repetitive, had this nightmare multiple times from as early as I can remember. PreK for sure.
I’ve had fears like that. Interesting how the mind works. I think saying Families will be together forever is more forceful and wrong because who wants to be together forever in abusive family or with a spouse that it isn’t right with, not me. I prefer the ‘can’.
As a man whose wife just came out to him recently, a month and a half ago, I would have loved to hear from the husband too. Really need some representation.
You know what sux after leaving the church, even almost 19 years later…. When I have a bad moment in my life it still creeps in that this bad moment is because I’m not following the gospel and God is punishing me. Which is so sad because bad moments are just that a bad moment. Also a family member has recently come out as bisexual and these episodes have really helped to support this family member better and even more than I did before (I’ve always supported any sexual orientation)
This two part interview with Lauren Rogers is excellent. So much validation for me in my journey, especially about finding your sexuality and navigating disability. I do have one gentle critique that I would like to offer. Lauren mentioned several times that she and her husband have been discussing open relationships. This is a more neutral way of talking about polyamory. Lauren was giving the secret sauce to how her marriage with her husband could survive the discovery of her sexuality. It would have been wonderful to hear more about how they have envisioned an open relationship. Modern polyamory is about allowing people to get their needs met in multiple relationships. There was a mention of another mixed orientation marriage and an indication that they eventually divorced, but continue as close friends and coparents to their children, while each is allowed to date other people. This is another form of polyamory. These are great examples of how two couples are navigating differences in sexuality while still remaining in relationship. I hope this topic is explored more in future episodes.
Honestly I just clicked into this second part and am very grateful you mentioned that open marriages/polyamory is at least mentioned, because at the end of the first part my lesbian heart was really sad imagining that this lovely woman might never experience her sexuality fully if they choose to be monogamous. obviously like... it's her life and her choice but it's still nice to hear that she's considering more open options to her future while keeping her marriage intact
Since she already don’t believe in God is better off just getting a divorce. If she really love her children that much, she would set an example to them. But unfortunately, people that are hurt like her, will hurt others, even though they don’t wanted. It wasn’t good to be raised in a divorce family, but it was better than see it them fighting or cheating. It is cheating, weather she likes or not. What kind of example is that? A good one? I don’t think so. I have sympathy for her, but many of us are deceit one way or the other in life, but we should thrive to not let that to separated us from God.
I so agree.. When my child came out as gay I felt that conflict acutely myself..the unconditional love I had for my child vs the conditions placed on acceptance by my "Mormon" God. That was the beginning of my faith crisis as well.
You are amazing! After 40 years I came out of Charismatic Christianity. Took 10 years of deconstructing, and still. It is so incredible how our theologies, deep down are identical, in my opinion not by default! The only difference is in our brainwashed afterlives. Heart breaking. The similarities relating to suppression on every level is uncanny. Thank you for being so awesome.
I wonder if you mind to comment if you are gay, and if you still believe that God exists. I am a so call believer that does not go to church anymore. Raised in a tradicional Protestant church and moved on to a Pentecostal one in the 90s. Thanks.
Being a parent was exactly how I deconstructed too. Realizing that when I looked at God objectively, I was a better parent- with all of my flaws- than Mormon God.
Joseph didn't tell Emma he was marrying and sleeping with other women...? Maybe this is where the secret Mormon quote... "Its easier to get forgiveness than it is permission, " comes from!
She is completely denying Jesus suffering for her, but in the other hand she is worshiping her own creation, her daughter. Many of them never go back to any relationship with the true God. Yes, it is difficult, but God is real and does love us.
I think society acknowledges that children need to be protected/helped but then when someone turns 18 it seems to be okay with negligent or incompetent treatment, passed off as well you're 18 now this is life toughen up (and of course not treating someone actually like a respected adult but rather infantilsing and controlling or exploiting). For me, like many I think the hardest years were 18 to my early twenties and there needs to be more compassion support and just competence and accountability for those in charge, with reporting/help/complaint procedures that take into they are dealing with young people, that are not dismissive in groups.
I agree. We do not automatically turn into adults because we are 18. We scientifically know that our frontal lobes do not fully develop until our mid 20s 24 to 26 yrs old. My son is 19 and he still needs my support. I am trying to support him from a distance, letting him solve his problems on his own but also having a soft place for him to fall.
Lol. Understanding is not comprehensive enough of a word. Listening to her makes me remember my first serious boyfriend from when I was a college student and how after a few years of relationship I told him I like women. At first, I said I was bisexual, but then I had to admit I was gay / a lesbian. The problem was that I was very sexually frustrated. I didn't like men and having sex with him was a chore, but he was "understanding". Basically, he liked things the way they were and as long as I didn't sleep with women and continued to meet his needs (sleep with him), he was understanding. Of course, I'm simplifying things very much now. To sum it up... we eventually broke up and I started dating women. I felt so trapped in that relationship, but I really cared about him and didn't want to break up. In the end, I just got really angry that MY needs never really got met and he didn't seem to care as long as HIS were. By this I mean that I really, really, really wanted to fuck women.. and he really, really, really didn't want me to. I don't really have the space here to explain why in my view her husband isn't understanding, but rather something else - a bit selfish, complaicent, and comfortable. I predict she will eventually divorce him. Not because of what some may think, but rather because I've been there. If she's talking about it, she's not only processing it, but also reaching a point of wanting to have her needs met. The bottom line is if you are gay,your primary need is to sexually and romantically be with someone of the same sex. No matter how great her husband is, he is not a woman. I know it's sad, but it's just how nature is. If she's not part of the religious community anymore, there isn't much to force her date a man.. apart from the remnants of a specific mentality. She's so young. She hasn't even peaked sexually yet. As she matures more and more, the desire for women will grow more and more. She wants sex, just not with her husband. At some point it will hit her.. the stupidity/futility of publicly claiming you're a lesbian and of being married to a man. I'm not saying it's wrong, I'm just saying it's a heavy burden to bear if you don't have a serious motivator, such as wanting to keep your orientation a secret.
@ciobalina7445 I understand where you're coming from and agree to a certain extent! Being fulfilled sexually is vital, which is why my husband suggested opening our marriage immediately upon me verbalizing that I'm gay. His love for me has never been selfish. That is one big reason I stayed. We prepared for the transition to non-monogamy for 6 months with a therapist and never looked back. As we have both dated other people (and the same people sometimes) our relationship has evolved. We are now platonic life partners, we raise our daughter together, and we date others as we please. My motivation to stay with him was not religious at all. First, was the desire to keep our family together (he's an amazing father). Second, was out of love. Even if I don't love him the way most wives love their husbands, I love him very deeply as my friend, baby daddy, and ultimately my chosen family.
I am a never-mo who has always had some thoughts about my own sexuality, never feeling like "straight heterosexual" was the right fit. Hearing Lauren talk so candidly and educated help me realize my own form of bisexuality: bi-asthetic heterosexuality. I don't think I could have came to this conclusion about myself without her help and without you all at mormon stories taking a story like hers. Love you guys 💓
Isn't it weird that if a church teaches that you should be Christ like. And Christ's most important lesson was love. As I have loved you love one another. Why do supposedly Christ-like people always show so much hate? Why are Mormon and other Christians so hateful? Let's all Love one another. 💜
My wife's grandfather was in Reagan and Nixon's cabinets...mormon from Montana, the only person not held accountable in Watergate because it was on recorded audio that "Shumway doesn't know". Her mom technically converted to the catholic church after meeting her father, but really has remained mormon to the core even though she most likely doesn't realize it. I found this podcast by accident. It's been shocking to both myself and my wife as we learn more and more about the mormon church and especially the eternal family. Her uncle is a bishop who only in the last few years, already in his 70s retired from the Pentagon, after decades of air force service. This podcast has helped me be more understanding of them, although I don't excuse the bs. Don't get me wrong, she was by no means just loved and accepted as she should have been; it was horrible for her before she ever met me. John Dehlin....my wife is an amazing person, a marine corps combat veteran who was injured, who went through so many versions of hell...I do believe her story is important as being sort of inside/outside but none the less seriously affected by the family system that she didn't even know she was in.
John's depiction of the conversation regarding 'mortal probation', and then this: I'm going to send my kids into foster care.. "Can you find me as a parent, now that I've destroyed all the evidence.(?)" - a priceless MSP moment - from a never-LDS who knows its theology inside & out/long-time fan of Dr. Dehlin's project(s)
BTW, I love your podcast John! I love the work you are doing, and think you and Carah are great together!! I am an Ex Mormon, my sisters and my parents are still believing members. Although, my parents were married in the temple and divorced years ago.
Her story reminds me a bit of the UA-camr Shgurr’s mission story. Shgurr had Plantar Fasciitis which caused her tendons to rip every time she stepped on an incline. And when she made an issue of it, her companions belittled her, told her it was her imagination, and trivialized her pain. Then when it got so bad she told her mission president she had to go home, the mission president vindictively told her her life was going to get worse for her failing to measure up to her calling. But as soon as she sees a doctor she’s instantly diagnosed with the condition and told she made it worse on her mission. I don’t know anyone more obsessed with telling others that things are all in their head than Mormons. Jesus would never.
Shgurr deleted the vid with 3 million views where she talked abou lt it because she felt she was modeling negative thinking online or something, but if you go to the twenty minute mark on “ Shgurr’s DML Complete series“ You can see the basic story in her drawing vid. I would not be surprised if the Mormon church pushed her to delete the video because it “painted members in a bad light” or something.
My husband and I have transitioned into being platonic life partners. We raise our daughter together but are both free to date others as we please. The relationship feels much more authentic now (though the love was always deep).
You were mourning the loss of a "dear friend" (Jesus) but ultimately, you gained a better one, YOURSELF. I found the worst thing about religion for me was the wall it put up between me and myself. You are asked to ignore your own instincts and critical thinking but the worst of it is, you are talking to an invisible friend when the entire time you could have been talking to yourself and learning at a much younger age how to trust yourself and KNOW your core person. BUILD your critical thinking skills. It's such an injustice to humanity and our basic human right to INFORMED consent.
I was in a mixed attraction relationship for nearly 4 years. I'm bisexual and transgender, non binary to be exact. It was good for about 2 and half years, got bad and only the fondness of growing up together by him for years stayed up. If we ever meet conversation goes and goes, consider the environment I grew up in: my paternal grandfather is gay and in a marriage to a straight woman. Maybe this is the reason for me looking at relationships like these as normal. I can love a man, being mostly attracted to women romantically, yet physical pull comes more in men. I fall in love with men too, just consider the harm that comes from it. Also, I'm demi sexual, so intimate relationships are a bit harsher in a conversation like this...
Thank you John & Lauren 🌸🌺🌸🌺💕. New South Wales Australia ❤❤ I try to understand however the Mormon beliefs are so different from my Anglican, Christian Bible. I am very sad that there are threats that you are discussing Lauren. I am also so very sorry for what you have gone through. I write and send, then when I edit/add more to my content, it disappears unfortunately! I don't feel comfortable to add my comments now.❤❤❤❤
Interesting. As a straight woman, I've loved gay men before (haven't we all?) but I don't think I could've been happy married to one, especially when I was younger and simmering in a stew of hormones; it would have been so frustrating to never have sex. Or to have sex with a man who wasn't sexually attracted to me. But if a gay person, like you, can be happy in a marriage when you don't get any personal sexual satisfaction, and if your partner is cool with that, then go for it. Maybe I'm the odd one out but when I have sex with someone I'm not attracted to I don't feel neutral, I feel revolted. But that's just me. I realize that's not the case with you.
That all makes sense. This was at the beginning of our journey after realizing I'm gay. We aren't sexual/romantic partners anymore, but platonic life partners raising our daughter together (and we are free agents to date others).
As an LDS mother, I was so often embarrassed and ashamed of my children. It makes me sick now to look back on how I thought! I loved my children with all of my heart, and it was so conflicting to feel ashamed of them. My kids have struggled, but they are amazing people! My son is a drug addict, but he is also the most compationate and loving person you could ever know. My beliefs made me think that "drug addict" was his identity. That is so not true!! I agree with Lauren that a truly loving Heavenly Father would not cast out or punish someone for something that for one, is an illness, and secondly, not who he truly is in his heart!
The idea that we have to "go through" certain things to become like God is sort of like hazing. You need to suffer to become like me because I had to suffer to become me. Like an abused parent abusing their child because they were abused. It's BS and if nothing else, a toxic cycle that should end (if it were real).
I wonder if people realize it that you will suffer weather you are in a church or not. Atheists are good people, does that make them less prone to not suffer? Absolutely not, God is not God to take away our pain, but to help it us to go through. What is interesting, everyone in the podcast that I listen to are gays, or lesbian wanting to live a free life. Some don’t even believe God anymore, that’s crazy, if you came to the conclusion that your church like many in the past are lying to you, what God has to do with that? Because he didn’t stooped the abuse? So sad the vision people have of God. But I do respect her for choosing her daughter and not God. But one day we will know if she did the right decision. She thinks she is a better mother than God is as father, how pretentious can that be? I am sad in some way, but we are free to denied God, he will not force himself on us.
Y'all wrote Josh and *Lilly Weed in the show notes but it's Lolly. She is nice and prolly won't mind but I love the name Lolly, and she might have had it misread and Lilly her entire life. Idk. ❤❤ love these
So interesting, becoming a parent reached me in knowing how deeply God loves me and would do anything including his son dying for me. The biggest truth is that Mormons worship Joseph Smith more then they admit. As a non Mormon what I see over and over is that accepting that Joseph Smith is a fraud then “God” is a fraud.
I agree with you Susan. I am a Christian, (Ex Mormon) and it makes me sad to hear them say that because they don't believe in Joseph Smiths teachings anymore, they don't believe in God. I would challenge them to read the Bible and find out the truth for themselves. The sad thing is, they have been taught, by Joseph Smith, that the Bible is not translated correctly. Imagine that!
Absolutely right. As a former Mormon who is now Christian I realize how lucky I am. But then I was not worried about incorrect translation and read the Bible which I highly recommend but if you really want to simplify things you can just ask God and He will guide and teach you.
@@leighyorgason6702 thank you, it has made my heart ache that turning from Joseph Smith makes so many exmormons believe Jesus is also a fraud. I pray that God will reach them in His time.
I did notice that many of them leave Mormonism, study how Joseph Smith was a fraud but they didn’t came to the conclusion that God is not preach it at their church. I am a Christian that does not go to church right now, but God is still in his throne, Jesus is my savior and he suffered a horrible death for me, something that my duty rag works will never pay it for. Excuse my English. There is no way for me to denied the existence of God, even after reading the Bible many times, and knowing that yes, God asked to his warriors to killed one entire city, all the habitants. That he striker the guy that tried to hold the ark or covenant, that he didn’t say no to Jesus to save us. God could find another way for our redemption, but Jesus gave his life gladly for me, how can I reject him? And I am having such a hard time these days, but God still reins in my life.
Carah's rough enough for me that I hesitated to listen. But the guest really spoke to me and I started listening. Then at one point Carah saved the day - when John seemed to say everyone should have sex before they are married (pressuring sex is not cool) - Carah stepped in and basically said, don't feel like you have to have sex to have a good enough idea you're into each other. John realized Mormon Stories isn't about telling people what to do. Momentary lapse for John, and kudos to Carah. Overall I still would have liked less opinions from the interviewers, and more just letting the guest tell her story, but still good. Thanks!
If a direct Young descendant has to learn the truth through the CES letter then how ON EARTH can the rest of us be told, "You should have known these things; we are as transparent as we know how to be." My my my my my my my word. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints lies.
Eldon Kartchner is a relative of mine. I think 1st cousin once removed? I remember growing up hearing family members being really critical of him because he "decided to live a gay lifestyle" 🙄. The system is so harmful, and it's so hypocritical that a church that claims to be Christlike and love others provides a space for people to be so judgemental.
I feel empathy for this young person,pun intended. She still soldiers on looking for sanity and healing. Her last name proves it.nobody escapes the sickness of the Mormon church.
Protestants believe that you could end up in heaven and your your family could not, too. My mom was terrified that my older sisters were going to hell, when I was a child because they listened to secular music. We were pretty fundamentalist.
Thank you for sharing your story with us. You are brave and I'm sorry that you are getting hated on here. I don't believe in god either and I agree with you fully that he is basically a dick! I'm married and am bisexual. My husband is amazing too and to be honest I am more attracted to women then men. Again, thank you for sharing your story. I'm glad to know you got out of morminism.
My great-grandmother was the first wife of the little-known under Brigham Young for him 12 children he asked her after being directed to take another wife if she would approve and she said no this is a good way for you to spend the rest of your life in prison. That was at the time that Utah wanted to become a state polygamy was holding them back so she said no and he went ahead and did it anyway and had to move the second ride to Colorado to live well when I was young wavestep family reunions all these strange people show up ask my dad who they were and he told me they were The Offspring of a second life that came over to be part of our family reunions great-grandmother Munch to her credit did not have much to do with her husband after that second marriage she just put him out of her life after taking a second wife. My God she had given him 12 children good grief what a slap in the face then I guess he was directed by the head of the church as a child and I never approved of it then never approve of it now so glad to see word Jefferson prison for the rest of his entire life the fact that shows this mess started at all makes me sick and lied to Emma about it
None of the Christian Gods are loving. The God of the Bible is not loving I can relate to this guest. After having my children, I definitely lost my faith in a God for similar reasons - I could not imaging treating my babies the way the Christian God I was raised to believe. I did not want to religiously traumatize my children. I have never been a Mormon but was raised Lutheran.
@@debbieoconnor5467 Yes. John was commenting that traditional Christianity didn’t use the reunification of family as a weapon. I was just saying that even in the traditional Christian belief system, reuniting with family is not biblically based. 👍🏾
I feel so sad for Mormons because I feel that their views on God are shaped by something completely false and that is not at all who God actually is. To each their own to believe, I just feel sad that the Mormon church has deceived so many.
Ok, I admit I don't completely understand this. Won't you someday want to be with a woman, though?.And what if it were turned around. How would you feel? If your husband had come out as gay and said he fantasizes about men when he's intimate with you? I think it's a fair question.
Hi Lauren can you tell me your meaning of church because I’ve always believed Churches one or more people talking about God it’s not a building it’s what’s in your heart why are you talk about that? I talk about that every day I say Amen every day I’m a good person God loves me unconditional I don’t have the following church rules or cult rules. I just go through my day knowing I love Jesus❤
When I said the church in the interview, I was specifically referring to the Mormon Church. I don't have experiences with other churches so I can't speak to them
1:30 Josh and Lolly Weed - - It can't be stated enough how much damage they did to LGTBQ people in the church with their very public and very vocal "decision" to be and remain mixed-orientation marriage. There was a shit ton of people hit with, "If they can do it, so can you. You just want to sin." I can tell from Josh's big announcement of their separation-headed-for-divorce that he realized the damaged caused. In tone, his words sounded very contrite. Part of me can't help but feel sorry for the Weeds as in a way, they were victims of a system just like everyone else, but I kind of wonder - had that gut feeling - that they were sort of basking in the light of all the attention. Josh's self-outing was sort of national news, at least in the blogosphere, and their eventually walking-back on all of it, so Josh could live and be his true self, caused both of them to lose all credibility on both sides. Mormon's and Christians don't like them for caving-in to Satan and Josh becoming a sinner. And the LGBTQ community don't like them for all the harm caused. Josh is a pseudo man without a country - persona non grata. He lost his ability to have a public voice as no one can trust anything he says. I personally would like to hear some of Josh and Lolly's post-marriage thoughts and perspectives on the whole thing, but expectedly; they are both mostly mute. And what I see and sense here with Lauren and her husband is authenticity. They're true to themselves and true to each other. ALL of their feelings and total selves are out on the table. The Weeds, and particularly Josh, REALLY felt and came across like they were over-compensating for what was not a fulfilling lifestyle. It's all extremely sad. And Josh professionally was/is a therapist. It just goes to show how much of a hold this religion can have on people. A professionally trained therapist couldn't even see the forest of his life and persona, for all of the high-demand religion and society trees.
It was humans who let her down. Sounds like her mission authorities just didn't care. I wonder what they would have done if there was a male missionary on the other end of the phone.
The punishment etc comes from the patriarchy and control of men of the church not from God or the creator or whatever you call him. it was the founders of the church and the ongoing elders etc that decided that that was the view of God they chose to create in the books to keep people under control Joseph Smith and the rest just lied to further their own needs above all others.
Hi Lauren, I am a born again Christian and at one point, when I was very young, maybe 9 or 10, I had many questions on the Bible. During mytime of finding out more and seeking answers I can say, with confidence, that Yes, the Bible is real, that Jesus is real, that God is real and the Holy Spirit is real. I also know, without a doubt, the the Trinity is Real, GOD THE FATHER, JESUS THE SON AND THE HOLY SPIRIT, 3 in one! Praise be to God. My prayer for you is that God will bring you and your young family back to HIM! God Bless You
I really wish Christians would allow people to make their own decisions for themselves without deciding they, the Christian, know better for them. It's very condescending and indicates that you are not listening to them to understand, only to correct.
Every religious person says that they know their God is real. I'm agnostic, I don't know about some form of God or Gods being real but I know that all religions are bullshit
I hope this isn't inappropriate but as a formerly religious lesbian, I am curious what your imaginary female partner is like? Is it a female version of your husband or someone entirely different... Just a carnally attractive individual?
Mi tire 12:20 where are you getting this from? Because my knowledge and according to the record of all his wives even the ones who didn’t want to marry him testify that they got personal revelations about getting marry to him. So I am intrigued where are you getting your facts
@@parkerplace2910 I do care if he is coming from a good hearted place where he really wants to inform. Or if he comes from a place where he wants to invert doubts. I had make my peace with the polygamy situation. I rather to get my information from the right sources. Regardless of the poligamy. I am not going to deny Joseph was a mártir and a true prophet. I had felt it very strong this is God’s church. Much things might not make sense but one thing does and is that I know this is His only church. His gospel is perfect EVeN if it doesn’t make sense to us. I KNOW of His love for all of us. I KNOW He wants to see us happy. It hurts people leaving the church. It hurts even more to see people attacking the church giving half truth half lies half exaggerations.
I just cant understand why Mormons make God and the Church one and the same so if Mormonism is not true then God is not true, The Church is a religion and God is God. Good grief. How terrible that when people find out the Church is nuts then there is no God.
Wonder how childhood or other trauma affects her viewpoints. All lot of her complaints really are on Christ and Christianity as Christianity is very similar.
If you ever feel the need to "open up" a relationship in order to make it work, then your relationship is doomed already. It would be better to raise your child as roommates or friends in that situation so you can love another significant other with your whole heart
Open relationships are a completely valid open for so many people. Your opinion is ill-informed, my friend. The social sciences show great outcomes in relationships that practice ethical non-monogamy. Maybe consider looking up those studies
@@laurenrogers8787 Your enthusiasm for the new sexual identity and open relationships is coming across as the same kind of over the top energy that Mormon missionaries have. I think you're setting yourself up for another fall. Also, it's a little creepy that you're both getting off on objectifying other women in public places like the beach. You're not offended, but don't you think some of these women you're ogling together might be? Do you really want to be that creepy swinger couple bothering women because you 'need' a 'unicorn'? I love this series, but this interview came across as less than truthful (there's no test for CFS/ME for one thing, just tests to rule other things out) and very, very creepy towards the end.
It depends on why someone is opening up their relationship and how they go about doing it. If they have lots of conversations and are open with each other and take it slow and ensure consent and comfort of everybody involved every step of the way, it can be done, and can be a good way for someone to have their needs met while still maintaining a relationship they love. I've known people who opened their relationship when one of them became chronically disabled to the point that they could no longer engage sexually with enough frequency to meet their partner's needs. THEY offered to support their partner seeking sexual fulfillment elsewhere, and it worked very well for them. I wouldn't recommend it if your relationship is rocky and you struggle with communication, but that's not (seemingly) the case here. When I came out as bisexual to my partner, he immediately offered to accommodate me exploring with women if I wanted to, because that wasn't an experience I'd ever had. I've not, as of now, ever wanted to take that step, but I know if I did he would be supportive and understanding about it as long as I was honest and up-front.
Eve the 4 Mary’s of Jesus day including Jesus mother Ester of the Book of Ester Sarah Rebeca Lydia of Thyatira Anna Elizabeth Abigail Hannah Deborah Delilah Ruth of the Book of Ruth Miriam Leah Dorcas Joanna Dinah Naomi and Phoebe. Well that’s quite a few women mentioned in the bible.
It's sad that so many people who leave the church no longer have a belief in God. It shows how the Mormon church uses God to manipulate their congregation. God is pure love, which Mormon's apparently never experience.
@@leighyorgason6702 I’d love to hear your supposed “facts”. Until then, you won’t see me following after any hateful made-up god, be it Mormon, Protestant, or otherwise.
There are "facts" to prove there is ANY god for ANY religion???? Every single diety worshipped can be traced back to random teachings/writings from random people. There is ZERO factual, provable evidence that any "god"/"creator" exists.
It’s sad that the Mormon church robbed you of faith in Jesus I have never thought to find my faith in a church oh I’ve tried but they have been found wanting and have been very judging
Is that an issue and what are you getting at with woke exactly? I’d like to know if there is something wrong with it or if it is factually inaccurate what they are doing or saying.
Your husband is one in a million. He's got to be the most understanding man on the planet. He's so unusual. He's a keeper. I think it's awesome that you love each other so deeply and have found a way to make your marriage work.
I married into a morman family. I longed to be one so that I was fully accepted. At age 14 I accepted Jesus as my Savior. I did not come from a Christian ( born again) home. I went to a Christian camp and Jesus was introduced to me. Im so grateful I accepted Him. When I took the lessons my inner spirit knew that this was a cult. I never became a morman but love the family I married into. How I wish Id heard this young lady when I was 20. Im now 72 and grateful for many of your guests. I live in South Africa and strangely your program has validated me for that decision I made 52 years ago. My husband left the morman church but so much makes sense through your program. Thank you.
Hi Lauren, I’m not religious but have just come to Mormon stories after watching John interview Chris Shelton re his Scientology experiences and your story is the first one I have listened to. I am fascinated by the psychology of religions. I seldom comment on videos but just wanted to say how impressed I am with your courage in telling your story and also with you as a person. I’m sure hearing your experiences will be helpful to many people on many levels. I found it inspiring. You come across as a wonderful human being and your daughter is so fortunate to have two such thoughtful and caring parents. With every good wish for your future happiness.
thank you!
I feel that my mormon experience is so much different than most females raised in the church..they were all so dedicated to the church (being obedient, missions,, BYU, etc) and here I was at 7 years old thinking and feeling that something wasn't right about mormonism..but no one would listen to me..
I relate to you. Even as a baby, I felt like there wasn’t something right about the church, yet I was seen as the “disobedient child”. My sister on the other hand, always followed the church, and was therefore seen as the “golden child”.
I was about 7 as well. Yep something is wrong...very very wrong but God got me through it and back to Him but it certainly wasn't immediately.
Me too
What is sad is that this lady lost her faith in God for good. She is not blaming humans for telling her lies and her family. This world is not perfect, but God does exist. So to me, I can’t understand how your brain light up and you don’t find the real God, the one that despised everything, do love us. Yes, the Old Testament is quite crazy, there is a lots of blood shredding, but God is just and he will see us through everything in this life. I have to admit it that many times I do get sad about how I was raised, and how I dream of a perfect life and perfect ending. But based in Jesus death, that’s not the case. And it is the church that do that to us, they do say it, came to Jesus and your life will be better, blessed and blah blah blah. Right now, I am not having answer to many of my questions, but I do believe God is God, if he wants to answer me he will, and if he doesn’t, he doesn’t. God still going to be God after I am gone. There is a lots of suffering in this life, then the next will be happiness. Now, I do not accept that blindly, because I did had other experiences with God, that I can’t denied. It is quite disturbing that they studied that much, enough to learn Joseph Smith wasn’t a prophet, but didn’t got to the bottom line of who is God, and Jesus. Other curious think is most of people that cares to this podcast are bissexual or gay. It makes me wonder, what forces are behind this deconstructions. May God bless them all to find happiness and Gods truly love.
👏🏽👏🏽😂😂smart young lady
"I don't need to suffer to be a good person." EXACTLY
Suffering or challenge helps us grow. Isn’t about being good or not. Our value is immeasurable in Gods eyes. That’s where the misconception is. It’s completely our choice to have faith in Christ or not and follow him. As Christ said no man is good except God even speaking of himself. I don’t think Christ wants us to focus on ego boosting things like am I good or not. We need to separate our value from our actions.
What an amazingly brave couple. If only all married couples had their level of honesty, communication & commitment, or even half their level, how much “true happiness” could come from that?! Thanks for sharing so much with us. I believe hearing your story will help many many people.
I really appreciate this episode. I think it's fine to recognize that a marriage works for now and to understand it might not always look the same and it can always be reevaluated as needed. Divorce can be healthy and even beautiful if you are able to see when a marriage isn't working before contempt sets in.
I agree! We are now platonic life partners, raise our daughter together, and date other people as we please
OMG.... Best "Mormon Story" ever...... This one pushed me to finally join MS and contribute a pittance of what I have received over the many, many months I cruise in and out of amazing content.
To me this is pretty straightforward: She's a lesbian who also has the capacity of falling in love with men but doesn't like sex with them, and she fell in love with a man. Because of that love, she wants to stay married and make it work. But lesbians like that are like unicorns; you can't base your life on the hope that you are one of those. Also, she was pretty open about feeling free to morph the marriage into whatever is best for them. I don't think that would be compatible with most "pray the gay away" people.
Lauren's husband is a rare gem in conservative religious communities
I am listening to this video on my husband's account. This is one of the best shows that I have seen and I have learned so much. I am 60 years old and I have a daughter that is 40 today. My husband passed away from cancer Nov.2021.I had so many of the same feelings in my life. I feel like now I am too old to explore that. It's just great to know that I'm not wrong for having these feelings. Thankyou for being authentic and just being yourself. I know that God is loving and merciful. Mankind has turned Christianity into just being religious and bound by there ways. Mans ways are not God's ways.We can never be perfect.I will strive to live the rest of my life just being happy 😊
People have relationships after 60.
It is never too late to explore! There is a huge community of late discovered lesbians!
Lauren what a very powerful and beautiful message about happiness! Grateful for your bravery and willingness to share your story! Another wonderful podcast! I left the church 25 years ago and didn't realize I was still in need of healing. This podcast has helped me with my path immensely!
Lauren's view on parenthood is one of the most beautiful views I've heard in my life. ❤️❤️❤️
She impresses me in a very deep way, for all kinds of reasons. She's simply a wonderful person ❤️ Mr Husband must be wonderful too ❤
This a absolutely one of your best stories. I admire Laura for putting her story out there. She will have no idea how many people that she has helped with her openness. Watching from Edmonton, Alberta. 2:03:28
Such a great interview. I'm not Mormon but grew up in a Penticostal church that lead with fear and obedience. So many similarities. I left when I was 18 but it wasn't until my mid 30s that I realised that if God was real, then he is the most narcissistic being ever and has no love for anyone.
Thankyou for doing these interviews. It helps many of us contthe healing process years after leaving the church
Wow this is such an incredible episode! You guys did such a great job with both parts of this. Packed full of information about why people who are very faithful leave the church.
I applaude you all.
So grateful to John for creating a place for people to tell their stories. It's invaluable!
"Losing belief in God and Jesus" This section resonates so much. I don't think I realized how much I wanted that love from a heavenly being until it was gone. My mom died 6 days before I went into the MTC as a 19 yr old. I think in a weird way I found in heavenly father's love, that motherly love that I had lost. In Jesus I found the unconditional love of someone who has your back no matter what. Just like you Lauren, my deconstruction in Mormonism really started in a deconstruction of the God I was raised to believe in. When, at 36 yrs old, I finally was able to accept the conclusions I had come to, it really did feel identical to how it was when I lost my mom. It was the same kind of grief. To add to that, I also had to deal with losing my mom again because now the dream of seeing her when I died had collapsed. Add on to that the crushing devastation of not being with my wife or kids in the next life. Even though I don't believe in hell anymore, during this time in my life, I was there. I spent a lot of time there in fact. The doctrine of eternal families is so beautifully comforting when you're in. Especially if you've lost someone you love. But when you lose that, it becomes as painful as it was comforting.
The doctrine of Eternal families is called comforting, but is truly terrorizing. I used to have a night terror as a young child that I had broken the sealing of my whole family by making a wrong choice, and I didn't know what that choice was. Repetitive, had this nightmare multiple times from as early as I can remember. PreK for sure.
Families "can" be together forever - - Such a power message of hope, there. /s 😝
I’ve had fears like that. Interesting how the mind works. I think saying Families will be together forever is more forceful and wrong because who wants to be together forever in abusive family or with a spouse that it isn’t right with, not me. I prefer the ‘can’.
I want to see this wonderful husband of hers.
I do too!!
As a man whose wife just came out to him recently, a month and a half ago, I would have loved to hear from the husband too. Really need some representation.
Becoming a mom also led to my shelf breaking. Love hearing her story ❤.
Lauren sounds like an awesome mom. I wish her and her family health and happiness.
I try to be! ❤
You know what sux after leaving the church, even almost 19 years later…. When I have a bad moment in my life it still creeps in that this bad moment is because I’m not following the gospel and God is punishing me. Which is so sad because bad moments are just that a bad moment.
Also a family member has recently come out as bisexual and these episodes have really helped to support this family member better and even more than I did before (I’ve always supported any sexual orientation)
This two part interview with Lauren Rogers is excellent. So much validation for me in my journey, especially about finding your sexuality and navigating disability.
I do have one gentle critique that I would like to offer. Lauren mentioned several times that she and her husband have been discussing open relationships. This is a more neutral way of talking about polyamory. Lauren was giving the secret sauce to how her marriage with her husband could survive the discovery of her sexuality. It would have been wonderful to hear more about how they have envisioned an open relationship. Modern polyamory is about allowing people to get their needs met in multiple relationships. There was a mention of another mixed orientation marriage and an indication that they eventually divorced, but continue as close friends and coparents to their children, while each is allowed to date other people. This is another form of polyamory. These are great examples of how two couples are navigating differences in sexuality while still remaining in relationship. I hope this topic is explored more in future episodes.
Honestly I just clicked into this second part and am very grateful you mentioned that open marriages/polyamory is at least mentioned, because at the end of the first part my lesbian heart was really sad imagining that this lovely woman might never experience her sexuality fully if they choose to be monogamous. obviously like... it's her life and her choice but it's still nice to hear that she's considering more open options to her future while keeping her marriage intact
I wasn’t ready to talk about opening the marriage but now I can say we are happily polyamorous!
Since she already don’t believe in God is better off just getting a divorce. If she really love her children that much, she would set an example to them. But unfortunately, people that are hurt like her, will hurt others, even though they don’t wanted. It wasn’t good to be raised in a divorce family, but it was better than see it them fighting or cheating. It is cheating, weather she likes or not. What kind of example is that? A good one? I don’t think so. I have sympathy for her, but many of us are deceit one way or the other in life, but we should thrive to not let that to separated us from God.
I so agree.. When my child came out as gay I felt that conflict acutely myself..the unconditional love I had for my child vs the conditions placed on acceptance by my "Mormon" God. That was the beginning of my faith crisis as well.
You are amazing! After 40 years I came out of Charismatic Christianity. Took 10 years of deconstructing, and still. It is so incredible how our theologies, deep down are identical, in my opinion not by default! The only difference is in our brainwashed afterlives. Heart breaking. The similarities relating to suppression on every level is uncanny. Thank you for being so awesome.
I wonder if you mind to comment if you are gay, and if you still believe that God exists. I am a so call believer that does not go to church anymore. Raised in a tradicional Protestant church and moved on to a Pentecostal one in the 90s. Thanks.
I would absolutely love to see the spreadsheet she made!
Such an amazing story! Thank you Lauren Rogers for sharing.
My love for my children is where mine started as well.
Being a parent was exactly how I deconstructed too. Realizing that when I looked at God objectively, I was a better parent- with all of my flaws- than Mormon God.
Lauren, whatever works for you and your husband! It’s good to see you smile after hearing your story! Much ❤️!
Joseph didn't tell Emma he was marrying and sleeping with other women...? Maybe this is where the secret Mormon quote... "Its easier to get forgiveness than it is permission, " comes from!
Her description of her realization as she is giving birth is the most metal, witchesversuspatriarchy thing I've ever heard!! She is my hero.
She is completely denying Jesus suffering for her, but in the other hand she is worshiping her own creation, her daughter. Many of them never go back to any relationship with the true God. Yes, it is difficult, but God is real and does love us.
@@laurenmay2098 Jesus who?
@@missellehansen I don’t know, you tell me, since she is your hero, not God the father...please...
God who? Must be a figment of your imagination.
@@laurenmay2098 Which God? You know there are children out there suffering more than the Jesus character in your story book ever did.
I think society acknowledges that children need to be protected/helped but then when someone turns 18 it seems to be okay with negligent or incompetent treatment, passed off as well you're 18 now this is life toughen up (and of course not treating someone actually like a respected adult but rather infantilsing and controlling or exploiting).
For me, like many I think the hardest years were 18 to my early twenties and there needs to be more compassion support and just competence and accountability for those in charge, with reporting/help/complaint procedures that take into they are dealing with young people, that are not dismissive in groups.
I agree. We do not automatically turn into adults because we are 18. We scientifically know that our frontal lobes do not fully develop until our mid 20s 24 to 26 yrs old. My son is 19 and he still needs my support. I am trying to support him from a distance, letting him solve his problems on his own but also having a soft place for him to fall.
Her husband is super understanding. Both are understanding. I wish things were different
Lol. Understanding is not comprehensive enough of a word. Listening to her makes me remember my first serious boyfriend from when I was a college student and how after a few years of relationship I told him I like women. At first, I said I was bisexual, but then I had to admit I was gay / a lesbian. The problem was that I was very sexually frustrated. I didn't like men and having sex with him was a chore, but he was "understanding". Basically, he liked things the way they were and as long as I didn't sleep with women and continued to meet his needs (sleep with him), he was understanding. Of course, I'm simplifying things very much now. To sum it up... we eventually broke up and I started dating women. I felt so trapped in that relationship, but I really cared about him and didn't want to break up. In the end, I just got really angry that MY needs never really got met and he didn't seem to care as long as HIS were. By this I mean that I really, really, really wanted to fuck women.. and he really, really, really didn't want me to.
I don't really have the space here to explain why in my view her husband isn't understanding, but rather something else - a bit selfish, complaicent, and comfortable. I predict she will eventually divorce him. Not because of what some may think, but rather because I've been there. If she's talking about it, she's not only processing it, but also reaching a point of wanting to have her needs met. The bottom line is if you are gay,your primary need is to sexually and romantically be with someone of the same sex. No matter how great her husband is, he is not a woman. I know it's sad, but it's just how nature is. If she's not part of the religious community anymore, there isn't much to force her date a man.. apart from the remnants of a specific mentality.
She's so young. She hasn't even peaked sexually yet. As she matures more and more, the desire for women will grow more and more. She wants sex, just not with her husband. At some point it will hit her.. the stupidity/futility of publicly claiming you're a lesbian and of being married to a man. I'm not saying it's wrong, I'm just saying it's a heavy burden to bear if you don't have a serious motivator, such as wanting to keep your orientation a secret.
@@ciobalina7445Thanks for your very thoughtful reply. I learned quite a bit by listening to your story.
@ciobalina7445 I understand where you're coming from and agree to a certain extent! Being fulfilled sexually is vital, which is why my husband suggested opening our marriage immediately upon me verbalizing that I'm gay. His love for me has never been selfish. That is one big reason I stayed. We prepared for the transition to non-monogamy for 6 months with a therapist and never looked back. As we have both dated other people (and the same people sometimes) our relationship has evolved. We are now platonic life partners, we raise our daughter together, and we date others as we please. My motivation to stay with him was not religious at all. First, was the desire to keep our family together (he's an amazing father). Second, was out of love. Even if I don't love him the way most wives love their husbands, I love him very deeply as my friend, baby daddy, and ultimately my chosen family.
Well done & congratulations Lauren, enjoy each other💕🌺🌺💕 New South Wales Australia
Be proud of yourself❤️
I am a never-mo who has always had some thoughts about my own sexuality, never feeling like "straight heterosexual" was the right fit. Hearing Lauren talk so candidly and educated help me realize my own form of bisexuality: bi-asthetic heterosexuality. I don't think I could have came to this conclusion about myself without her help and without you all at mormon stories taking a story like hers. Love you guys 💓
Interesting. I think this fits a lot of women. Us women are just too beautiful 😄
I'm so glad!!
I loved this discussion.
Joseph Smith left school at 3rd grade. Mark Twain left school at age 12, in 6th grade. This was not uncommon back then.
Isn't it weird that if a church teaches that you should be Christ like. And Christ's most important lesson was love. As I have loved you love one another. Why do supposedly Christ-like people always show so much hate? Why are Mormon and other Christians so hateful? Let's all Love one another. 💜
Wow I really connected with your point of view and experience. You are so well spoken. Thank you for sharing. 🩶
An amazing interview with a courageous guest.
What an amazing relationship. Sex eventually ends but the love and affection hopefully lasts forever
My wife's grandfather was in Reagan and Nixon's cabinets...mormon from Montana, the only person not held accountable in Watergate because it was on recorded audio that "Shumway doesn't know". Her mom technically converted to the catholic church after meeting her father, but really has remained mormon to the core even though she most likely doesn't realize it. I found this podcast by accident. It's been shocking to both myself and my wife as we learn more and more about the mormon church and especially the eternal family. Her uncle is a bishop who only in the last few years, already in his 70s retired from the Pentagon, after decades of air force service. This podcast has helped me be more understanding of them, although I don't excuse the bs. Don't get me wrong, she was by no means just loved and accepted as she should have been; it was horrible for her before she ever met me. John Dehlin....my wife is an amazing person, a marine corps combat veteran who was injured, who went through so many versions of hell...I do believe her story is important as being sort of inside/outside but none the less seriously affected by the family system that she didn't even know she was in.
John's depiction of the conversation regarding 'mortal probation', and then this: I'm going to send my kids into foster care.. "Can you find me as a parent, now that I've destroyed all the evidence.(?)" - a priceless MSP moment - from a never-LDS who knows its theology inside & out/long-time fan of Dr. Dehlin's project(s)
What a wonderful, beautiful story……..way to chalk it up, Lauren!
BTW, I love your podcast John! I love the work you are doing, and think you and Carah are great together!! I am an Ex Mormon, my sisters and my parents are still believing members. Although, my parents were married in the temple and divorced years ago.
Is there any way we can get access to the spreadsheet she made? It would be extremely helpful for those starting a faith transition.
I don't want to be rude or anything, but been there done that. I just hope she can be happy as she deserves and live freely.
Been where?
Her story reminds me a bit of the UA-camr Shgurr’s mission story. Shgurr had Plantar Fasciitis which caused her tendons to rip every time she stepped on an incline. And when she made an issue of it, her companions belittled her, told her it was her imagination, and trivialized her pain. Then when it got so bad she told her mission president she had to go home, the mission president vindictively told her her life was going to get worse for her failing to measure up to her calling. But as soon as she sees a doctor she’s instantly diagnosed with the condition and told she made it worse on her mission.
I don’t know anyone more obsessed with telling others that things are all in their head than Mormons. Jesus would never.
Shgurr deleted the vid with 3 million views where she talked abou lt it because she felt she was modeling negative thinking online or something, but if you go to the twenty minute mark on “
Shgurr’s DML Complete series“
You can see the basic story in her drawing vid. I would not be surprised if the Mormon church pushed her to delete the video because it “painted members in a bad light” or something.
@@wellsaidgoodheadfred9843they are in a bad light for a long time now, I guess it does not matter anymore.
Can anyone find the source for "We don't need good answers, just answers" from Oaks that was quoted in here. I can't find it online.
Any church that teaches hate is not teaching the Bible and teaching of Jesus. Leave any church that teaches hate.
It’s been a year would love to her update how’s it going for her ❤ thank you for your story
My husband and I have transitioned into being platonic life partners. We raise our daughter together but are both free to date others as we please. The relationship feels much more authentic now (though the love was always deep).
Lauren, thank you so much. I learned so much from your story.
You were mourning the loss of a "dear friend" (Jesus) but ultimately, you gained a better one, YOURSELF. I found the worst thing about religion for me was the wall it put up between me and myself. You are asked to ignore your own instincts and critical thinking but the worst of it is, you are talking to an invisible friend when the entire time you could have been talking to yourself and learning at a much younger age how to trust yourself and KNOW your core person. BUILD your critical thinking skills. It's such an injustice to humanity and our basic human right to INFORMED consent.
I was in a mixed attraction relationship for nearly 4 years. I'm bisexual and transgender, non binary to be exact. It was good for about 2 and half years, got bad and only the fondness of growing up together by him for years stayed up. If we ever meet conversation goes and goes, consider the environment I grew up in: my paternal grandfather is gay and in a marriage to a straight woman. Maybe this is the reason for me looking at relationships like these as normal. I can love a man, being mostly attracted to women romantically, yet physical pull comes more in men. I fall in love with men too, just consider the harm that comes from it. Also, I'm demi sexual, so intimate relationships are a bit harsher in a conversation like this...
Kara with the questions we all want to know 😂
Thank you John & Lauren 🌸🌺🌸🌺💕.
New South Wales Australia ❤❤
I try to understand however the Mormon beliefs are so different from my Anglican, Christian Bible.
I am very sad that there are threats that you are discussing Lauren. I am also so very sorry for what you have gone through.
I write and send, then when I edit/add more to my content, it disappears unfortunately!
I don't feel comfortable to add my comments now.❤❤❤❤
Thank you.
!!!
Interesting. As a straight woman, I've loved gay men before (haven't we all?) but I don't think I could've been happy married to one, especially when I was younger and simmering in a stew of hormones; it would have been so frustrating to never have sex. Or to have sex with a man who wasn't sexually attracted to me.
But if a gay person, like you, can be happy in a marriage when you don't get any personal sexual satisfaction, and if your partner is cool with that, then go for it. Maybe I'm the odd one out but when I have sex with someone I'm not attracted to I don't feel neutral, I feel revolted. But that's just me. I realize that's not the case with you.
That all makes sense. This was at the beginning of our journey after realizing I'm gay. We aren't sexual/romantic partners anymore, but platonic life partners raising our daughter together (and we are free agents to date others).
As an LDS mother, I was so often embarrassed and ashamed of my children. It makes me sick now to look back on how I thought! I loved my children with all of my heart, and it was so conflicting to feel ashamed of them. My kids have struggled, but they are amazing people! My son is a drug addict, but he is also the most compationate and loving person you could ever know. My beliefs made me think that "drug addict" was his identity. That is so not true!! I agree with Lauren that a truly loving Heavenly Father would not cast out or punish someone for something that for one, is an illness, and secondly, not who he truly is in his heart!
The idea that we have to "go through" certain things to become like God is sort of like hazing. You need to suffer to become like me because I had to suffer to become me. Like an abused parent abusing their child because they were abused. It's BS and if nothing else, a toxic cycle that should end (if it were real).
Wow! I have never thought of it that way! So true!!
I wonder if people realize it that you will suffer weather you are in a church or not. Atheists are good people, does that make them less prone to not suffer? Absolutely not, God is not God to take away our pain, but to help it us to go through. What is interesting, everyone in the podcast that I listen to are gays, or lesbian wanting to live a free life. Some don’t even believe God anymore, that’s crazy, if you came to the conclusion that your church like many in the past are lying to you, what God has to do with that? Because he didn’t stooped the abuse? So sad the vision people have of God. But I do respect her for choosing her daughter and not God. But one day we will know if she did the right decision. She thinks she is a better mother than God is as father, how pretentious can that be? I am sad in some way, but we are free to denied God, he will not force himself on us.
Who performed these weddings for Joseph Smith?
Brigham Young, Hyrum Smith, Heber C Kimball, and Willian Clayton
“I’m gonna fill this chair with lesbians every day of the week!” 😂
Every single one I watched is gay, or lesbian, not sure if it is only for Mormons or other religions as well.
Children are the greatest blessing of the Lord
Y'all wrote Josh and *Lilly Weed in the show notes but it's Lolly. She is nice and prolly won't mind but I love the name Lolly, and she might have had it misread and Lilly her entire life. Idk. ❤❤ love these
Got it fixed! Thanks!
So interesting, becoming a parent reached me in knowing how deeply God loves me and would do anything including his son dying for me. The biggest truth is that Mormons worship Joseph Smith more then they admit. As a non Mormon what I see over and over is that accepting that Joseph Smith is a fraud then “God” is a fraud.
I agree with you Susan. I am a Christian, (Ex Mormon) and it makes me sad to hear them say that because they don't believe in Joseph Smiths teachings anymore, they don't believe in God. I would challenge them to read the Bible and find out the truth for themselves. The sad thing is, they have been taught, by Joseph Smith, that the Bible is not translated correctly. Imagine that!
Absolutely right. As a former Mormon who is now Christian I realize how lucky I am. But then I was not worried about incorrect translation and read the Bible which I highly recommend but if you really want to simplify things you can just ask God and He will guide and teach you.
@@leighyorgason6702 thank you, it has made my heart ache that turning from Joseph Smith makes so many exmormons believe Jesus is also a fraud. I pray that God will reach them in His time.
@@nikevans1 thank you, it makes me happy k owing there are ex Mormons that find out that Jesus not Joseph Smith is their savior
I did notice that many of them leave Mormonism, study how Joseph Smith was a fraud but they didn’t came to the conclusion that God is not preach it at their church. I am a Christian that does not go to church right now, but God is still in his throne, Jesus is my savior and he suffered a horrible death for me, something that my duty rag works will never pay it for. Excuse my English. There is no way for me to denied the existence of God, even after reading the Bible many times, and knowing that yes, God asked to his warriors to killed one entire city, all the habitants. That he striker the guy that tried to hold the ark or covenant, that he didn’t say no to Jesus to save us. God could find another way for our redemption, but Jesus gave his life gladly for me, how can I reject him? And I am having such a hard time these days, but God still reins in my life.
Lauren needs to sue the LDS church for lifelong medical care
Carah's rough enough for me that I hesitated to listen. But the guest really spoke to me and I started listening. Then at one point Carah saved the day - when John seemed to say everyone should have sex before they are married (pressuring sex is not cool) - Carah stepped in and basically said, don't feel like you have to have sex to have a good enough idea you're into each other. John realized Mormon Stories isn't about telling people what to do. Momentary lapse for John, and kudos to Carah. Overall I still would have liked less opinions from the interviewers, and more just letting the guest tell her story, but still good. Thanks!
If a direct Young descendant has to learn the truth through the CES letter then how ON EARTH can the rest of us be told, "You should have known these things; we are as transparent as we know how to be." My my my my my my my word. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints lies.
Eldon Kartchner is a relative of mine. I think 1st cousin once removed? I remember growing up hearing family members being really critical of him because he "decided to live a gay lifestyle" 🙄. The system is so harmful, and it's so hypocritical that a church that claims to be Christlike and love others provides a space for people to be so judgemental.
I feel empathy for this young person,pun intended. She still soldiers on looking for sanity and healing. Her last name proves it.nobody escapes the sickness of the Mormon church.
In the question of multiple wives, where did he keeps all of those women? Were they all in one house?
They were secret wives so most of them continued living wherever they were living before they married him
Love Wins.
Protestants believe that you could end up in heaven and your your family could not, too. My mom was terrified that my older sisters were going to hell, when I was a child because they listened to secular music. We were pretty fundamentalist.
Thank you for sharing your story with us. You are brave and I'm sorry that you are getting hated on here.
I don't believe in god either and I agree with you fully that he is basically a dick!
I'm married and am bisexual. My husband is amazing too and to be honest I am more attracted to women then men.
Again, thank you for sharing your story.
I'm glad to know you got out of morminism.
My great-grandmother was the first wife of the little-known under Brigham Young for him 12 children he asked her after being directed to take another wife if she would approve and she said no this is a good way for you to spend the rest of your life in prison. That was at the time that Utah wanted to become a state polygamy was holding them back so she said no and he went ahead and did it anyway and had to move the second ride to Colorado to live well when I was young wavestep family reunions all these strange people show up ask my dad who they were and he told me they were The Offspring of a second life that came over to be part of our family reunions great-grandmother Munch to her credit did not have much to do with her husband after that second marriage she just put him out of her life after taking a second wife. My God she had given him 12 children good grief what a slap in the face then I guess he was directed by the head of the church as a child and I never approved of it then never approve of it now so glad to see word Jefferson prison for the rest of his entire life the fact that shows this mess started at all makes me sick and lied to Emma about it
None of the Christian Gods are loving. The God of the Bible is not loving I can relate to this guest. After having my children, I definitely lost my faith in a God for similar reasons - I could not imaging treating my babies the way the Christian God I was raised to believe. I did not want to religiously traumatize my children. I have never been a Mormon but was raised Lutheran.
Is Lauren Rogers still married, in 2024?
Yep!
Vhs tapes lol . I'm sure someone will come up with one and sell it to them. 😂
Nowhere in the Bible does it say that people will be with their families if going to heaven. This is entirely concocted.
Mormons do not believe the Bible to be the sole Word of God. The Book of Mormon carries more clout to LDS
@@debbieoconnor5467 Yes. John was commenting that traditional Christianity didn’t use the reunification of family as a weapon. I was just saying that even in the traditional Christian belief system, reuniting with family is not biblically based. 👍🏾
Yes, of course it is entirely concocted, much like the Bible.
I feel so sad for Mormons because I feel that their views on God are shaped by something completely false and that is not at all who God actually is. To each their own to believe, I just feel sad that the Mormon church has deceived so many.
Ok, I admit I don't completely understand this. Won't you someday want to be with a woman, though?.And what if it were turned around. How would you feel? If your husband had come out as gay and said he fantasizes about men when he's intimate with you? I think it's a fair question.
Absolutely a fair question and one we considered extensively. We are now platonic life partners, raise our daughter together, and date other people.
wait…periods at 17?!!!?!!!? lucky ducks!!!😞
Hi Lauren can you tell me your meaning of church because I’ve always believed Churches one or more people talking about God it’s not a building it’s what’s in your heart why are you talk about that? I talk about that every day I say Amen every day I’m a good person God loves me unconditional I don’t have the following church rules or cult rules. I just go through my day knowing I love Jesus❤
When I said the church in the interview, I was specifically referring to the Mormon Church. I don't have experiences with other churches so I can't speak to them
1:30 Josh and Lolly Weed - - It can't be stated enough how much damage they did to LGTBQ people in the church with their very public and very vocal "decision" to be and remain mixed-orientation marriage. There was a shit ton of people hit with, "If they can do it, so can you. You just want to sin." I can tell from Josh's big announcement of their separation-headed-for-divorce that he realized the damaged caused. In tone, his words sounded very contrite. Part of me can't help but feel sorry for the Weeds as in a way, they were victims of a system just like everyone else, but I kind of wonder - had that gut feeling - that they were sort of basking in the light of all the attention. Josh's self-outing was sort of national news, at least in the blogosphere, and their eventually walking-back on all of it, so Josh could live and be his true self, caused both of them to lose all credibility on both sides. Mormon's and Christians don't like them for caving-in to Satan and Josh becoming a sinner. And the LGBTQ community don't like them for all the harm caused. Josh is a pseudo man without a country - persona non grata. He lost his ability to have a public voice as no one can trust anything he says. I personally would like to hear some of Josh and Lolly's post-marriage thoughts and perspectives on the whole thing, but expectedly; they are both mostly mute. And what I see and sense here with Lauren and her husband is authenticity. They're true to themselves and true to each other. ALL of their feelings and total selves are out on the table. The Weeds, and particularly Josh, REALLY felt and came across like they were over-compensating for what was not a fulfilling lifestyle. It's all extremely sad. And Josh professionally was/is a therapist. It just goes to show how much of a hold this religion can have on people. A professionally trained therapist couldn't even see the forest of his life and persona, for all of the high-demand religion and society trees.
Exmos seem to swing super far left after leaving their church.
The left is where the truth is. When you seek truth you tend to find it.
Either that or John picks his guests. Either way, it perpetuates the Mormon notion that those who leave the Church do so because they want to sin.
Maybe watch the premiere before judging its content 🤷🏼♀️
Yea, a bit too far.
GOOD.
It was humans who let her down. Sounds like her mission authorities just didn't care. I wonder what they would have done if there was a male missionary on the other end of the phone.
The punishment etc comes from the patriarchy and control of men of the church not from God or the creator or whatever you call him. it was the founders of the church and the ongoing elders etc that decided that that was the view of God they chose to create in the books to keep people under control Joseph Smith and the rest just lied to further their own needs above all others.
5
What are lecherous man despicable
Hi Lauren, I am a born again Christian and at one point, when I was very young, maybe 9 or 10, I had many questions on the Bible. During mytime of finding out more and seeking answers I can say, with confidence, that Yes, the Bible is real, that Jesus is real, that God is real and the Holy Spirit is real. I also know, without a doubt, the the Trinity is Real, GOD THE FATHER, JESUS THE SON AND THE HOLY SPIRIT, 3 in one! Praise be to God. My prayer for you is that God will bring you and your young family back to HIM! God Bless You
I really wish Christians would allow people to make their own decisions for themselves without deciding they, the Christian, know better for them. It's very condescending and indicates that you are not listening to them to understand, only to correct.
Every religious person says that they know their God is real. I'm agnostic, I don't know about some form of God or Gods being real but I know that all religions are bullshit
I hope this isn't inappropriate but as a formerly religious lesbian, I am curious what your imaginary female partner is like? Is it a female version of your husband or someone entirely different... Just a carnally attractive individual?
Mi tire 12:20 where are you getting this from? Because my knowledge and according to the record of all his wives even the ones who didn’t want to marry him testify that they got personal revelations about getting marry to him. So I am intrigued where are you getting your facts
@@parkerplace2910 no, what is it about?
@@parkerplace2910 also, is this Tod Compton an active member of the church?
@@parkerplace2910 I do care if he is coming from a good hearted place where he really wants to inform. Or if he comes from a place where he wants to invert doubts. I had make my peace with the polygamy situation. I rather to get my information from the right sources. Regardless of the poligamy. I am not going to deny Joseph was a mártir and a true prophet. I had felt it very strong this is God’s church. Much things might not make sense but one thing does and is that I know this is His only church. His gospel is perfect EVeN if it doesn’t make sense to us. I KNOW of His love for all of us. I KNOW He wants to see us happy. It hurts people leaving the church. It hurts even more to see people attacking the church giving half truth half lies half exaggerations.
what words of Joseph Smith are you speaking of? Conversations with Dan Jones? Can you give me a link or reference so I can read it too?
GLENN Walker
I just cant understand why Mormons make God and the Church one and the same so if Mormonism is not true then God is not true, The Church is a religion and God is God. Good grief. How terrible that when people find out the Church is nuts then there is no God.
That's their choice. You have a right to believe in God just as they have a right not to.
why is it terrible to not believe in a god?
Wonder how childhood or other trauma affects her viewpoints. All lot of her complaints really are on Christ and Christianity as Christianity is very similar.
If you ever feel the need to "open up" a relationship in order to make it work, then your relationship is doomed already. It would be better to raise your child as roommates or friends in that situation so you can love another significant other with your whole heart
Open relationships are a completely valid open for so many people. Your opinion is ill-informed, my friend. The social sciences show great outcomes in relationships that practice ethical non-monogamy. Maybe consider looking up those studies
@@laurenrogers8787 Your enthusiasm for the new sexual identity and open relationships is coming across as the same kind of over the top energy that Mormon missionaries have. I think you're setting yourself up for another fall.
Also, it's a little creepy that you're both getting off on objectifying other women in public places like the beach. You're not offended, but don't you think some of these women you're ogling together might be? Do you really want to be that creepy swinger couple bothering women because you 'need' a 'unicorn'?
I love this series, but this interview came across as less than truthful (there's no test for CFS/ME for one thing, just tests to rule other things out) and very, very creepy towards the end.
It depends on why someone is opening up their relationship and how they go about doing it. If they have lots of conversations and are open with each other and take it slow and ensure consent and comfort of everybody involved every step of the way, it can be done, and can be a good way for someone to have their needs met while still maintaining a relationship they love.
I've known people who opened their relationship when one of them became chronically disabled to the point that they could no longer engage sexually with enough frequency to meet their partner's needs. THEY offered to support their partner seeking sexual fulfillment elsewhere, and it worked very well for them.
I wouldn't recommend it if your relationship is rocky and you struggle with communication, but that's not (seemingly) the case here.
When I came out as bisexual to my partner, he immediately offered to accommodate me exploring with women if I wanted to, because that wasn't an experience I'd ever had. I've not, as of now, ever wanted to take that step, but I know if I did he would be supportive and understanding about it as long as I was honest and up-front.
Well his whole family dabbled in Black Magic and so on and so forth didn't they?
Eve the 4 Mary’s of Jesus day including Jesus mother Ester of the Book of Ester Sarah Rebeca Lydia of Thyatira Anna Elizabeth Abigail Hannah Deborah Delilah Ruth of the Book of Ruth Miriam Leah Dorcas Joanna Dinah Naomi and Phoebe. Well that’s quite a few women mentioned in the bible.
Right, in the bible. Not the Book of Mormon.
It's sad that so many people who leave the church no longer have a belief in God. It shows how the Mormon church uses God to manipulate their congregation. God is pure love, which Mormon's apparently never experience.
Excellent
Why would exmormons leave a cult just to join another?
@@Glamerth your mind is made up. Why try to change it with facts.
@@leighyorgason6702 I’d love to hear your supposed “facts”. Until then, you won’t see me following after any hateful made-up god, be it Mormon, Protestant, or otherwise.
There are "facts" to prove there is ANY god for ANY religion???? Every single diety worshipped can be traced back to random teachings/writings from random people. There is ZERO factual, provable evidence that any "god"/"creator" exists.
It’s sad that the Mormon church robbed you of faith in Jesus I have never thought to find my faith in a church oh I’ve tried but they have been found wanting and have been very judging
The mormon church robbed me of many things but faith in Christ was not one of them. It was my critical thinking that dispelled that belief
The Mormon "woke" podcast.
The “edgy” UA-cam comment.
@@ElectroDoom haha! Nice Mike!
Is that an issue and what are you getting at with woke exactly? I’d like to know if there is something wrong with it or if it is factually inaccurate what they are doing or saying.
Do you think woke is good or bad? Can't tell.