I’ve slowly started dating a young lady who has such an enormous heart for the Lord and for others. That is the most attractive thing I see about her. When I talk to my dad I say how amazed that such a wonderful young women would even give me the time of day!! How grateful I am to the Lord everyday for the moment I get to spend with her!
A very timely reminder for me. I just spent almost a day surfing online stores for skin care and makeup products, then i was notified by this new episode. God really loves us, he gently reminded me about this truth.
Thank you Pastor John, and the team of desiringGod for your hard work, I thank God for you all. I would just like to add to what Pastor John said for anyone watching, I encourage you to read the bible, and gain a God-focused perspective, and consider the commandments. The world and humanity was created perfect and there was no death, therefore we Adam and Eve had perfect bodies AND they loved God with all their minds and bodies and souls. Post-fall, sin comes into the world, now humanity is idolatrous, and death comes in also, along with genetic imperfections and diseases of all kinds. So in our sinful bodies remains the idolatrous self, which worships the creature not God, and seeks it's own glory through what God created. Continued and overwhelming dissatisfaction over your appearance is a temptation to idolize yourself or sex and to seek glory from the approval of others. It is a problem of idolatry, therefore the cure is to believe in Christ, confess your sins against God and to commit your heart to loving God first. Remember that happiness is not a zero sum game with God, because He is not limited in any way, but do not want a perfect body in this world, as it will be a body of sin, and making a sinful body stronger or more beautiful will only exacerbate the problem of pride, which is the very thing that God cures us from in the gospel. No one is perfectly happy with the way they look, ultimately because we do not trust God with our happiness as we should. All good things originate with Him, and He has only given good gifts to us. We are tempted to want to be self-sufficient, to desire approval and love from people, to be confident in ourselves. Remember that this is a body of sin, which must be crucified, not coddled. Finally I will give my own example from my own life, I am also insecure about my appearance, and I am male. I've desired a slightly different body, with different attributes that I think, (or have thought), would make me happy. Obviously, I could sense the covetousness and the dissatisfaction within the desire. So, by God's grace, I didn't just shut it up inside, but I started to think about it biblically. The bible is sufficient to make us wise to understand and discern the problems of our hearts. As I started to sort it out, I saw that this insecurity came from deeper desires. (This is how my monologue sort of went). I want a different/more attractive body. Why? To gain attention from women. Why do you want that? To get love and adoration and glory for me. That is foolishness, as you've seen from solomons life, God's laws and your own experience with lust. The attention and love and adoration of women is nothing then, sense says that it is fickle at best. And if it is gained through sin, which it is, whether that is flirting or fornication or whatever, that is of no profit, it leads to judgement, condemnation. Alright, marriage is the proper way, as God prescribed, He created my body, He knows the blueprint. But I'm still insecure, discontent, I want a better body than I have still. Why? To get my wife's love, to keep her attention on me. What happens if you can't keep her? Whether this woman or any other or women? I will be abandoned. And that is the real issue, a fear of abandonment. So thank God for the gospel! Christ has purchased for us God's great promises. He says: I will never leave you, nor forsake you. Amen, yes, that's what I really need, to give this desire for safety and security to God, not to a human, which is idolatry. Whether a wife/husband stays or goes will not take my joy away, if it is rooted in God, as it should be. Yes, and your desire to capture the heart of another person is idolatrous, consider how you will give your desire to safety to God, wouldn't a godly wife do the same? Yes she would, and in that we would both be secure in God and free to love the other sacrificially. I will not lust or abandon my wife for another for mere body parts or affection or whatever reason, because I will know that true happiness comes from knowing God and walking in obedience before Him, submitting your desires to Him to be satisfied. And she will not seek her ultimate joy in my body or any other man anyway because she knows her God, and her joy is in Him. So this is the key, fight covetousness, discontentment or anything that tries to steal your joy by believing that God is for you (read it in the bible, don't trust me), renewing your mind in His wisdom in His word, remembering the futility of your former sins, fight temptation, pursue obedience and faith and love and keeping your eyes fixed on Jesus, the hope of our hearts.
Greetings people. I heard this podcast and was drawn to the story about that missionary lady. I was obsessed with my body that I hated mirrors from 9 to 35 years old. God delivered me to where am very happy with my body and whole being because the creation story in Genesis 1 is my affirmation that I made in his image and are very good in his eyes. I look in the mirrors daily and see myself through God's eyes literarily and it makes me smile. Men too can experience freedom from God's word. Thanks pastor John for such a great insight.
Hey, your natural hair is stunning! Don't worry about obsessing over it or not liking it but pray that God will open your eyes to the blessing he has given you in it. You are fearfully and wonderfully made and that includes your hair. A more practical piece of advice would be to look after it how it needs to be looked after (not what others tell you or what youtubers say to do cos everyones hair is different), take time to learn your hair. It's easier to ignore because we can easily hide it with extensions or wigs or whatever but ask God to show you how to look after it. No worry or question of ours is too small or insignificant to Him. Remember that✨💃🏽🙌
@@destinynkechi3053 thank you for your words of encouragement sister. It’s difficult some days. I try not to get so sad about it. It hurts. I would love to rock my natural hair but I haven’t found a way to manage it. It’s just too much. I’m currently trying to nurse my hair back to health. It’s all a new process for me as I’m a new natural. I’ve been praying for healthy hair a lot. I know the Lord is listening. I just need to be patient. Thanks for your support. And thanks for taking your time to encourage me. God bless you sister. 💖
Thank you so so much to the young lady that asked the question ,I have the same issue except I am 37! I have adhd and OCD. My issues with both weight and image has caused a great deal of problems in my life and relationships. I also have ptsd from being in abusive relationships too causing more issues . I wish that I could hug this young woman,and tell her all the things I wish someone told me at that age. Thank you pastor John so much for your wisdom ! I was a cosmologist for 8 yrs trying to help women see themselves better and make them acceptable to society . I HATED that I had to do that tho ! My intention was always to help them feel better about themselves but something never quite felt right about it . last August everything fell apart with my business ,I had begun resenting my job ....the endless mirrors in my salon were literally killing me .I started hating the idea that I was contributing to this non sense even tho my intention was to help ,the industry itself leaves no room for wanting to help" people . my prices got lower ...and lower ...and lower. Because i wanted to help them ! I could not say no when I KNOW how cruel the world is . even tho I was practically broke,my job was so much mor3 rewarding !! These women can't afford this stuff and I started seeing that my job is so bad ! I still tried to keep it together but guess what ....covid ultimately made me stop doing it.fortunately I had already given up my shop ,my lease ended and I was getting raised double rent so I closed last Sept.THANK GOD because I would bE dealing with all that now ! I was working but under a mobile license until march of this year . now I have contemplated a complete career change , I want to help people ,not make them worse and take their money. I became a Christian thus January, I know now that God was looking out for me even before that when I still had the salon .something inside ne pushed me to close ! Now I know why . any way lol sorry for the book but this hit so so close to home. If possible,can you guys do more videos on this subject and maybe we can pray about it together? Thank you either way ! I'm addicted to your channel lol you guys are amazing
I have ocd too, I often over think everything! I keep thinking God is mad at me or something, but I constantly keep telling myself makeup is a sin and I’m not going to heaven or it’s an idol. I love beautiful things and makeup but idk if it’s God or just my inner voice. How do I know it’s God? I look at myself and I spend more time watching Christian videos that anything 😂 I just need clarity. Thank you sis for this testimony!
Absolutely one of the most BEAUTIFUL podcasts ever. ( from a 62 year old woman who also has MAKEUP video subscriptions! ). This is so very true! Loving God and others makes one way more beautiful than any man made concoction
I was just asking Jesus help from this last night ...I’m 26 and so tired of obsessing over my physical experience. I’m just like that 19 year old... I tend to look in the mirror a lot because I want to be happy with what I see I try to fix what I call flaws in my mind (if my only my teeth were straight, my nose was smaller) and my irrational logic says that if I one day I am pleased with what I see then I will not focus so much on my exterior and would put more effort on Christ...
@Sofia Bravo I know what you mean; we all tend to emphasize "flaws" in our appearance that others would never notice. But be encouraged - God custom-made every strand of your DNA for His good purpose. (And for what it's worth, if that's you in your profile pic, you're actually really pretty!)
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I just checked you out I reckon you need a tooth job and to get that massive honker sorted and then possibly some random bloke whose down on his luck might wander into your web. Are you truly that vain ? Seriously, there’s Jesus dying on that cross so you can inherent eternal life and you say hey tx there Jesus for that and go check out the mirror to see if your acceptable enough of a person for some random bloke you can titillate along because hey he needs to me invigorated bye your wow wow enough to put a ring on it !! Just stop 🛑 STOP STOP STOP ) get your relationship right with Jesus first and then what follows follows )) take it from me I know what I’m talking about, find your identity in Christ not in image or accessories or your saleability ) don’t sell yourself short lass, God first fellas a loooong way second xx
Lust in the heart of men turns them into evil, unabashed, self-consumed takers, who steal what is most precious; rather than virtuous, upright, sacrificial givers - desiring to have that which is not theirs to take. Lust in the heart of a woman turns them into vain, prideful, and pretentious snares, selfishly giving away what should be kept; rather than meek, quiet, and lovely receivers - desiring to be desired by those who should not desire them. How tragic that we have failed to address this issue in the church today. Let us repent from this grievous and destructive sin. Men, in particular. Rise up and speak the truth on this issue, in love, boldly. This falls back onto us, in the Church, O men of God. God will judge the cowardice that so many of us have displayed before Him openly. We are to protect, provide for, and preserve good amongst His people, and we have failed in this. Enough. I'm tired of the boys. Get over the love for your own life, or stop pretending to love Christ while you watch the Church crumble as it is slowly infested by the rotting poison of the world. Again, this falls back on us. Salt and light, men. Salt and light. Repent.
@@justinbirkelo6806 You should back up all your wisdom with the wisdom of God because it does not come from man, the things we know we did not teach ourselves, but they were given to us by the Spirit of God. Give glory to God, not to man and his common 'sense', (of which we have none since we are all so depraved in our sin), so please endeavour in the future to always quote the verses of the bible you've learnt from. Also it's a real benefit to less mature christians as you then encourage them to spend time in it themselves. Thank you.
@@Lethargo226 First and foremost, thank you for your encouragement and admonition. It is well received, and a good reminder to always give glory to God. Nevertheless, I do not see that attributing a truthful statement to 'common sense', or 'personal experience' as something that either robs God of glory, or is less true (despite the fact that even these 'common sensical' truths are in some way rooted in Scriptural truths which are well known and received by those who dwell within the pages of sacred Scripture). If these things which were stated in the original comment were false, or robbed God of glory, then sure. Your comment is well placed. However, it was not. The comment was intended to rebuke the complacency of men within the context of the Church who have allowed these destructive heart conditions to take root in the Church like a cancerous tumor, unaddressed. You, it seems to me, are straining at gnats. Again, I appreciate your zeal for the glory of God; a zeal which I share, dear brother. I would simply encourage you to examine your heart. There may indeed be an overly critical spirit in there which you don't realize is actually contributing to the poison to which I was referring in the original comment above - a heart condition, the destructive power of which I am all too aware of, and am deeply saddened by. Walk humbly before the Lord, dear brother. :)
I just want to thank you for this powerful message. Women are not the only people that struggle with this. Fitness and body dysmorphia are real struggles that many men won't admit to. Thank you for sharing!
One of the best Ask Pastor Johns. It's not just women that struggle this. More men are. Especially young men, specifically with wanting to look like Marvel Super Heroes.
One of the best ones I've heard . Man now I want to go be a missionary somewhere and just leave all this vanity behind ! God please help us here in america and other places full of vanity to see our true purpose , help us to see the value of our inner man and not just focus on our outward appearance. Amen
Being obsessed with yourself is the same reason why people aren’t willing to face persecution for Christ, they love there body more than they love the lord and his will. The physical body is just a tool or vessel used to praise and serve the lord and we are held accountable for the actions we commit within these bodies, but the body is not truly “us”. We will receive new “uncorrupted” bodies in heaven.
I’m the end, what will matter? Your appearance or your heart for God? He’s not going to judge you by your image but by your heart. Look, wanting to look pretty isn’t a bad thing, it becomes a bad thing once you put that over God. Many call it idolization, and many struggle with that, i struggled with that. So in all of this, your image of what you look like doesn’t matter to the king. It’s your heart, don’t feel like you have to look perfect all the time. Your already a perfect creation in Gods eyes!
I'm so guilty of this, I've been trying to deny it for a long time, but I'm really obsessed with my looks and its becoming a huge issue. I stopped wearing make up though and I'm starting to like the way I look without it but still I'm constantly obsessed with the way I look and the clothes that I wear. Please pray for me 😔😔
Sometimes I envision myself running away to India and leaving the pressures of society to look a certain way. It has an impact on feeling accepted and relationships sometimes. How can we not be concerned on our looks when other people point out our looks. Yet, the renewing of the mind and suffering alters that perspective. I am overcoming it and would love to live evryday not being so anxious about it
This is a topic I have been thinking about lately. I agree with some of this, but feel it is a complex issue. I would say even with the church it is difficult for women, because even Christian men really value (or seem to value) whatever they consider to be attractive or beautiful. The pressure keeps building with social media and it's enormous. The short answer I would give is to pray for God's grace to help you stop focusing on appearance AND to pray enjoy God more than the attention of others. There is nothing wrong with painting the barn.
I agree ! Being a millennial or Gen Z woman is REALLY hard. As much as men say they don’t like make up and love natural is super confusing to me. Women who are the farther from natural have massive followings which consist mainly of men. I don’t want that by no means but it makes me feel like that’s how I need to look. 🥺
a small miisssing piece of a puzzle makes it dffcult to complete the entire picture of a puzzle box,Lord always knows what is in best interest for his beleivers.
Men struggle with the same issues whether they want to admit it or not. Not everyone can have the face or figure from TV, magazines or the fake social media posts. One day as I was struggling with my appearance (namely my nose lol) I looked in the mirror and it's like I could hear The Holy Spirit say, " Everytime you look into the mirror and are critical of yourself, you FEED insecurity! Stop feeding insecurity and stop focusing on your flaws!" Those words have helped me tremendously. I still have setbacks from time to time but everyday I'm looking to STARVE insecurity and comparison and FEED my faith in Jesus who said I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Less looking in the mirror throughout the day definitely helps STARVE the evil spirits of insecurity and low self esteem. God bless anyone who reads this in Jesus name amen!
Excellent question and answer John piper, I've struggled on and off with my appearance too at times. This podcast was a God send to many women of this generation and the next! Ps one key part of healing is never compare yourself to someone else (read psalm 139). Focus of God more! Also to all the younger girls who struggle with this GET OFF SOCIAL MEDIA. Finally dear brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things. Phil 4:8
As a man I can admit we can struggle with this also. I felt like I recently received a blessing in disguise that woke me up and put me back on the correct path towards salvation and it began with me focusing on my health. It has now moved over towards bodybuilding and health and helping my family towards reaching the same goals. I have fought myself admiring some of my progress but being humbled and reminded that it was God who is working through me. Idk if this applies to this directly but is it possible to carry on this mission of helping others and not get caught up in vanity?
N M M Easier said then done. That's like telling someone who's struggling with suicide thoughts to just stop thinking about it. It's sometimes just not that easy
@@alexianicole7268 suicide is demonic though and I don't think is comparable. The person that is suicidal needs to actively seek prayer from a prayer warrior, call a prayer line.
Ashley M The spirit of comparison is also demonic. Someone who struggles with this should also seek deep prayers. What's minor to you might not be to others. Every Christian has their own struggles
Even after being a Christian for over 40 years, when I encourage Godly woman who abides by these principles, I too am In awe and want what she has ( because I KNOW where it comes from)......
Very hard not to focus on your appearance when it basically determines whether or not someone will want to marry you. It's the difference between finding love and being alone the rest of your life.
As a believer and woman I agree with you. I lost a lot of weight and have a lot of excess skin and fat. How the hell am I supposed to love myself with this excess. Outer appearence is important regardless of what anyone says.
i suggest to not focus to yourself, it's like thinking "stop thinking the red light", but you still see the red light in your mind. we need to divert our attention to God by reading His word, praying and knowing more of His love. easier said than done but yeah, God will help us.
I struggle with this too 😭 I’m 24 and scared to get fine lines, scars, wrinkles, grey hair etc... I’m always looking at ways to reverse and slow down the ageing process, by buying anti-aging products, having a better diet, doing face messages to prevent wrinkles etc... it’s so draining 😔😔 and sinful because it’s vanity and I’m making this an idol 😩😩
If men stopped weight and age shaming us both in life and online we wouldn't be worried. But men have told us, both directly and by implication, that our value is looks.
In order to be helpful to our brothers (without diminishing the longer-term struggle of our sisters), can we stop talking as though this problem is exclusive to women - it isn't. Speaking for myself as well as a lot of mates and acquaintances, we could ALSO do without looking in the mirror so much. All one needs to do is visit a gym to see the problem. Not that the gym itself is necessarily the problem, but it's obvious how much value we men place on aesthetics, and not just when it comes to looking at the opposite sex.
Father God, thank you for never selling us short and never asking us a favor in return for a curse, thank you for having a complete sane and peaceful mind instead! In accordance with this word and proverbs 31:30, ezekiel 16:15, 2 corinthians 6:14-18 I bind to hell one trusting in or overestimating one's beauty while binding one to a healthy and balanced look at one's beauty and appearances in my life, the lives of my family, friends, colleagues, neighbours, acquitances, opponents and the body of Christ while binding to hell one prostituting one's beauty and giving one's beauty to another, binding to hell every unequal yoke and common share with anyone trusting in and overestimating one's beauty and appearances while prostituting one's beauty and giving one's beauty to another, in the name and blood of Jesus Christ, amen and hallelujah, glory to God ❤: "'But you trusted in your beauty and used your fame to become a prostitute. You lavished your favors on anyone who passed by and your beauty became his."
Churches often have a culture that implies women have to look a certain way. Change your church culture. And if all the men leave, 😆well then you know why women spend so much time on their clothing and looks. The truth is men value women who are good looking more than women who are good hearted. Men don’t look for a wife or girlfriend at a charity meeting or volunteer group. They look at photos, profiles and “youth” organizations. That’s why there are multi billion dollar makeup and clothing companies, modeling agencies, movie stars, etc. If women want to be seen and not invisible, they have to compete. A woman who looks “plain” because she is seen as not participating in cultural norms of beauty, which can be ridiculous and extreme, is assumed to be trying to be single or anti male or have some other antisocial attitude.
I have a question along the same line. And if they’ve covered this then someone link it to me. But where does physical health fit into a Christian life. And how do you prevent it from becoming an idol?
Yes I agree and feel the same way too. Except mine isn't just my appearance but also my ethnicity as well. I am Filipino (Asian) and many times I question God why he made me Asian. Why I couldn't just be Caucasian, European, or Hispanic instead. I hated my small narrow eyes, round flat face, thin eyebrows, big lips, and big flat bulbous nose in the center of my face. I hated my features and hated being born Asian. I feel like I am stuck in a body I do not want at all and had no control over. I existed without wanting to be here. Its a horrible feeling. When you want to do God's will and live life to the fullest and then every morning you see in the mirror your reflection. Its disheartening. Its true we can change alkt of things about ourselves. We can live for God, surrender our will for him, change our mindset, change how we live our lives and how we interact with people, work on our diet to be healthy, but our appearance isn't something we can change. We have no control over this and we have no control over the race we are given. I do in a way feel angry at God. I try not to be and see the good, but God is all powerful and with him all things are possible. Yes genetics do play a part into it but also there are people who are incredibly beautiful that look nothing like their parents, there are people born tall while both their parents are short, some born with sharp thin nose while the rest of their close relatives all have flat nose, so its hard to not question. I feel like life would be better of if everyone was created one race and everyone was created equally as beautiful just like angels who God created beautiful.. As much as looks may not be all that important its still nice to actually love myself for me. It is unfair. I know people say its the inner beauty that counts and yes I do believe in that 100% but its hard for me to swallow the fact that if I live my while life in this earth not focusing on my appearance and just sold out for Jesus completely, in heaven for all eternity i will still look the way I do now on earth. I may be younger in heaven and have a glorified body but my race will still be present with me for all eternity and my appearance. So pretty much here on earth and in heaven for all eternity ill have to accept the fact that im naturally unattractive only in heaven it won't hurt because nobody will judge me for my looks or reject me, still though ill always look like this and yes its all true I was handed bad cards in this life and there's nothing much to do about it. There are times when I try to serve God and read my bible and love him and then id see pictures of myself tagged in stuff and I am like is this a joke, I look like a joke. Yes I do feel mad at God. Because out of the nations he could have chosen to put me in it is the Philippines. I look this way and he could have put a soul of mine to a different womb and I am so insecure about my nose. Its unfair. I dont think its right at all. Im sure God is aware that some of his people will get rejected and beaten down because of something they can't control and I know his also aware of some of his children praised for their beauty. I understand looks fade over time but what I do know is this when we enter into heaven we will all look like ourselves in the prime stages of our lives so we carry with us how we look like when we were in our mid 20s or 30s. I am upset about this why? Because the guy I like my coworker and friend he only used me for sex, all this time he likes another girl he had fwb with this entire time he had feelings for her. Just like him she is also the same race, Mexican and she is very beautiful in every way, has many hobbies, and has a great figure. I got pregnant and he didnt want the baby at all and was mad when the girl found out and he lost her. The thing is I couldn't even be mad for the mistreatment, yes it was not right what he did but honestly in reality why would he go for an ugly Asian girl like me when he is handsome himself and can get with any girl whose beautiful in the outside and inside as well. I dont blame him for never liking me and using me. Its the truth. Im more so angry at myself because I hoped, I was just wishful and should have seen it all coming all along that he was not serious and I am not his type, that im an ugly girl. See even myself now I like people and won't call one ugly, but would I date someone I am not at all attracted to ? I wont I may like the person as a friend but I wont be in a relationship with that person because there has to be some sort of attraction at the least. So I do understand why he did what he did, and I know I may not used people like that but can I honestly say looks dont play a roll whatsoever. No. It does to some extent. That's why its very hard. Extremely. Our looks do play a roll in how we are defined in this world, but even then if all people find me ugly why cant I be born beautiful just for even myself to love me and love what I see paired with a good heart on the inside. Why God?!
Wow how are you? I struggle a lot with some of your thoughts and feelings. I am Puerto Rican and look more Indian I rather look like Arab like from Yemen or Egypt 🇪🇬 but it’s ok . I wanted to share so you don’t feel so alone . I struggle alit with my appearance . Hope your feeling okay or feeling better.
Hi, I am European girl and I have the same struggle. Race means nothing. After reading your story I just really want to hug you and fill you with self love just as Christ would do. I am so sad to hear that you hate your race, when I always found Asian, especially Filipinno people so attractive! Everything you are insecure about, nose, eyes, lips, i find all of those things so fine. Don't let those evil spirits to deceive you and convince you that you're less worthy because of looks. I've seen so many times that inner beauty comes on the outside and it becomes seenable too! Christ will do his work. And, don't be bothered about eternity, we're not sure how are we gonna look like, but I'm sure we're all gonna be beautiful and that much satisfied in Christ that it won't matter to us at all :) Life is hard, but try not to put yourself down. Aim to build your strong identity in Christ and that is something that nobody can take from you. Usually, we're not that bothered how we look, but how others percieve us. If you're bothered how will guys see you, remember that God has everything in control and if it is his will and if you treasure nothing but his will for your life, god will find a man that loves you for who you are in Christ. I always tell my self, health=beauty. Do what you can to keep your temple of Holy Spirit healthy. Exercise, eat healthy, sleep, hydrate yourself enough... Keep your head up and back straight. You are loved. Wish you all the best my sister in Christ. Hope to see you one day up there to hug you and you to tell me I was right :) God bless ❤️
I struggle with the same issue as this woman. I've struggled with this from the first day of elementary school since I started being bullied because of my appearance. I had a few friends there though who said I was nice and all but they also eventually stopped being friends with me because they were afraid of being bullied because of me. I truly believe people like Mother Theresa and and other selfless people like her were and are beautiful, but I'm unsure about how many young men would've wanted to marry her in her older years. That said, I believe there's different kinds of beauty in the world. There's the beauty of finding a spouse with good genes who are more likely of producing healthy children or the beauty of Mother Theresa. So unfortunately this did not really answer the question to me. I also often wonder whether this would also make me a bad person for being so appalled by the idea of marrying someone twice my age. Does this make me a bad person for not even giving possibly good kind hearted old men a chance?
Beauty is vain when choosing wife but it doesnt means beauty is not good. Beauty is good because god created the world beautiful by sight so pursuing outward beauty is good too but not to be obssesive but to be selfcontrolled. Women should wear cloth modest but it dosent mean cloth should not be beautiful Their character should be humble quiet and gentle but it dosent mean their appearance should not be beautiful. We must pay attention not to go another extreams
Quiet & humble ? 🤦♀️ And what do you mean their appearance should be beautiful ? People are born the way they are born. A woman can only change that thru plastic surgery ect and most do because so much is put on looks …. How your doing. You are the problem.
Can pastor John to speak on depression and suicide because I have struggled with it since I was 4 and I am 25 right now so I don’t believe god is real but I believe in a higher power
Dear Jon, you being in here is a beautiful act!!!!! It means you are seeking for deliverance and knowledge of God. It reminds me of the people in the Bible who were desperate for the touch of Jesus and they were delivered. I know God has the same for you. I know depression and suicidal thoughts come with the lack of desire to seek God (from where comes our strenght) so, get together with Godly people my friend! People who can pray for you and help you throughout your journey. Try to have daily moments with God (even if it's just a little bit to start with) and, something REALLY IMPORTANT: as you fill yourself with His word and promises, your mouth will also start to get full with His truth, so it will allow you to speak the Word of God over yourself. Speak the promises over yourself!!! The Bible says that our tongue how power to bring life or death. I dealt with panic attacks for over 14 years, and believe me, trusting in God through my actions + speaking life over myself played a really essencial and important role in walking in the freedom Jesus accomplished to us on the cross. And, know He will finish the good work in your life. Keep going my brother! God bless you for He loves you.
Jon, I am praying for you. This was a battle in my life for decades. I am deeply committed Christian, yet still had this devastating malady. I urge you to see a physician who can help with medication. I also encourage you to cry out to the God who created you. He IS real and wants you to know Him. He loves you more than you know and can be found in the Bible. Bless you!!!
Dear Jon ! God is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all you can ask or think according to his mighty power that is within you.! don't give up on God he will reveal himself to you and you will know how much he loves you and how much he cares for you.judt keep seeking and knocking for him ! Just don't. doubt him and even if you does ! Just say God help my unbelief.God bless you.
Hello Jon, I would like to share the gospel with you. I understand your depression as I have felt the same way as well. What you are feeling is the result of a life lived without God. God is real, the earth and the heavens, your conscience and mine, our dissatisfaction with this world all testify that God is real. We do not in our current state think much about God when we are happy, to thank Him or even consider that we might be grateful, but it is in pain that humanity looks away from it's selfish activity to consider the reality of God. Suicide is wrong, and it will not give you the release you want, in fact, I'll tell you it will make your pain worse. Life is a gift from God, anyone who destroys life sins against God. And sin is the reason why the world is in the state that it is in right now. And what is sin? Sin is failing to love God as you should, and it shows up in our behaviour, we are law breakers and we have broken God's law. God's law states: You will have no other God before God. You will not worship a false God. You will not take the name of God in vain. You will honour your parents. You will not murder, or hate anyone in your heart. You will not commit adultery in your body or in your heart. You will not steal. You will not lie. You will not covet, desire anything that belongs to someone else for yourself. Be honest with yourself, have you kept these laws? I haven't, I have also broken them. The way it goes, when you break one law, you have broken them all, as all sin comes from a failure to love God as you should. But there is hope, because the God of the bible, the true God is “The Lord, the Lord, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness, keeping steadfast love for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, but who will by no means clear the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children and the children’s children, to the third and the fourth generation.” (Ex 34;6-8). So God is a God of mercy. And this is His mercy: (John 3:16) “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life." In His mercy, He has made a way for sinners to be forgiven. The message of the gospel is; acknowledge your sin, repent and ask for God's forgiveness, hope for it, seek it, pray for it, seek God until He grants you eyes to see Jesus for who He truly is, start reading the bible with Matthew and begin seeking this forgiveness and mercy and hope. God has promised to give good things to those who ask Him, believe He exists and ask Him for the Holy Spirit and He grant Him to you. So ask and ask and knock until you get it, if you seek Him, He will come. The reward of the gospel is being with God in heaven, where there will be no sickness, or death, or trouble, or evil, or crying, or unhappiness of any kind.
9:30 I wouldn’t have ever dare say that to him, that’s really rude. “And am not put off by your looks”. Seriously?Mentioning that is very wrong and was not necessary. You probably never saw him again because he wanted to avoid ever meeting you again. I just don’t like how you phrased the way you talked to him in general. Overall, yes your message is good, it’s the inside that counts, but also outward appearances do play a role, you can take Esther for example and all the beauty treatments she and the rest of the ladies who competed with her did. Also Jacob and his love for Rachel because of her beauty.
Having a desire to be Beautiful is very dangerous!! Let's take a look at God's Word on this. There are many of God's prophet's who tell about Idols. Jeremiah 10 says, They cut down a tree, and a craftsman carves an Idol and then they fasten it securely with hammer and nails so it won't fall over. Their gods are like scarecrows in a cucumber field! Do you know what this is about? God often uses trees to express people. Can a good tree bring forth bad fruit? The tree of life. When our Lord healed a blind man, he first saw people like trees walking around after Jesus placed his hands on him the first time. The parable of the fig tree and so on. Now, when you cut down a tree, this means to pick one individual out of many and you highly esteem that person. Look at a model, what do the photographers do? They dress her up and make her or him look fabulous. Or you might have a certain movie star that you hang up on your wall. Or it may be yourself that you adorn and worship. You have made an Idol. You have committed Idolatry. Guess what the Lord made me do once? I had always wanted very long hair, and finally I had it. But the Lord saw that I loved it too much. So one fine day, as always I was listening to a sermon on Idolatry. The Lord mercyfully showed me my Idol, it was my hair and my outward appearance. I was convicted. I had prayed the day before that if I had any idols, that God would show me. Well he did and I cut my hair short. It was very hard, but God gave me strength to do it. I was so relieved afterward. I gave much thanks to God for that. Let us be very careful not to provoke our Lord with our abominal Idols. He desires to take first place in your heart. He will have ALL your heart or none of it. All or nothing. Thanks pastor John!!!
I love this but the majority of men I see like women who wear a ton of make up and who have completely altered their body. The more they are altered the more follower they have … millions upon millions. Being a millennial or Gen Z woman is extremely hard. 🥺
Don't get in your head too much about it. Ask God to keep your heart in check about your motivations. Putting on muscle will help prevent bone loss in your future, it helps with depression, and helps cognitive functioning. It's a long term investment in your health! I struggle with this too❤
Sorry Pastor I don't know these men that don't care for their woman to wear make up and such. Saved or not. Well, that isn't true. Married men over 68 years old don't seem to care. Men seem to love having a wife who knows how to properly wear make up which includes color.
Do you stare at yourself in the mirror? do you have mirrors all over the house? how much time do you spend putting on makeup n doing your hair every day? think about that. Its reasonable to put on makeup n do your hair in the morning and to touch it up IF you are going out in the evening for a social or work meeting. BUT if you stare at yourself every time u go by a mirror that can be telling you you are obsessing about your looks. Nothing wrong with looking good or put together nicely. BUT TOO much makeup; an extreme hair style/color etc; piles of jewelry; total skin tight clothing; that whole look is TOOOO much!! I do my hair n makeup ONCE a day, glance in the mirror several times a day but ONLY if there is a mirror where Im going FOR another purpose; I generally comb my hair ONCE every 24 hrs thats all and i have long hair. wearing makeup or jewelry or nice clothes is NOT a crime or a sin; but TOO much of any or all of those items can lead to obsession and problelms. There was once a great rather tense debate among the women of a lg church I went to regarding makeup etc. The pastor got fed up with this and said at the next sermon, if the barn needs painting then PAINT IT!! matter closed! I have been called eye candy...but only from people who had wives that totally did not look after themselves; and certainly not in my older years. moderation is the key, like anything!
John, what you said to that man was conveying to him that you did take issue with his deformity and that you were attempting to appeal to his spirit and person and not to the one in us that is no respector of persons to whom our worship is appealing, if our heart is in it. Your heart seems to be right but steadaly bumping in to the door frame and wall just flickering the light switch as you bounce back from it trying to go through. If you actually have found Jesus the way is narrow. Have you figured out why you never saw him again after that. ........hey I know your ugly but I'm gonna over look that and still explain God to you...... John, what kind of bread is that with mold on it.
Grow up ! Ego and pride make you an enemy of God..don't get me wrong..some people are beautiful naturally but they respect themselves and have modesty (:
I’ve slowly started dating a young lady who has such an enormous heart for the Lord and for others. That is the most attractive thing I see about her. When I talk to my dad I say how amazed that such a wonderful young women would even give me the time of day!! How grateful I am to the Lord everyday for the moment I get to spend with her!
Such a great question that we secretly wonder about and wish to ask. Thanks to the young lady for asking this. Thanks Pastor John.
A very timely reminder for me. I just spent almost a day surfing online stores for skin care and makeup products, then i was notified by this new episode. God really loves us, he gently reminded me about this truth.
Me too sister! God is so gracious to us.
@@LGHhhhhh hugs! :) We're beautiful in His sight.
Same
same He is so good
Oh my GOODNESS. 😭😂 The Lord spoke to me DIRECTLY through this.
Shutting out the media whenever possible may also help. Be content with what God has given unto you
It WILL help.
Amen to this
Thank you Pastor John, and the team of desiringGod for your hard work, I thank God for you all.
I would just like to add to what Pastor John said for anyone watching, I encourage you to read the bible, and gain a God-focused perspective, and consider the commandments.
The world and humanity was created perfect and there was no death, therefore we Adam and Eve had perfect bodies AND they loved God with all their minds and bodies and souls.
Post-fall, sin comes into the world, now humanity is idolatrous, and death comes in also, along with genetic imperfections and diseases of all kinds.
So in our sinful bodies remains the idolatrous self, which worships the creature not God, and seeks it's own glory through what God created. Continued and overwhelming dissatisfaction over your appearance is a temptation to idolize yourself or sex and to seek glory from the approval of others. It is a problem of idolatry, therefore the cure is to believe in Christ, confess your sins against God and to commit your heart to loving God first.
Remember that happiness is not a zero sum game with God, because He is not limited in any way, but do not want a perfect body in this world, as it will be a body of sin, and making a sinful body stronger or more beautiful will only exacerbate the problem of pride, which is the very thing that God cures us from in the gospel. No one is perfectly happy with the way they look, ultimately because we do not trust God with our happiness as we should. All good things originate with Him, and He has only given good gifts to us. We are tempted to want to be self-sufficient, to desire approval and love from people, to be confident in ourselves. Remember that this is a body of sin, which must be crucified, not coddled.
Finally I will give my own example from my own life, I am also insecure about my appearance, and I am male. I've desired a slightly different body, with different attributes that I think, (or have thought), would make me happy. Obviously, I could sense the covetousness and the dissatisfaction within the desire. So, by God's grace, I didn't just shut it up inside, but I started to think about it biblically. The bible is sufficient to make us wise to understand and discern the problems of our hearts. As I started to sort it out, I saw that this insecurity came from deeper desires.
(This is how my monologue sort of went).
I want a different/more attractive body.
Why?
To gain attention from women.
Why do you want that? To get love and adoration and glory for me.
That is foolishness, as you've seen from solomons life, God's laws and your own experience with lust. The attention and love and adoration of women is nothing then, sense says that it is fickle at best. And if it is gained through sin, which it is, whether that is flirting or fornication or whatever, that is of no profit, it leads to judgement, condemnation.
Alright, marriage is the proper way, as God prescribed, He created my body, He knows the blueprint. But I'm still insecure, discontent, I want a better body than I have still.
Why?
To get my wife's love, to keep her attention on me.
What happens if you can't keep her? Whether this woman or any other or women?
I will be abandoned.
And that is the real issue, a fear of abandonment. So thank God for the gospel! Christ has purchased for us God's great promises.
He says: I will never leave you, nor forsake you.
Amen, yes, that's what I really need, to give this desire for safety and security to God, not to a human, which is idolatry. Whether a wife/husband stays or goes will not take my joy away, if it is rooted in God, as it should be.
Yes, and your desire to capture the heart of another person is idolatrous, consider how you will give your desire to safety to God, wouldn't a godly wife do the same?
Yes she would, and in that we would both be secure in God and free to love the other sacrificially. I will not lust or abandon my wife for another for mere body parts or affection or whatever reason, because I will know that true happiness comes from knowing God and walking in obedience before Him, submitting your desires to Him to be satisfied. And she will not seek her ultimate joy in my body or any other man anyway because she knows her God, and her joy is in Him.
So this is the key, fight covetousness, discontentment or anything that tries to steal your joy by believing that God is for you (read it in the bible, don't trust me), renewing your mind in His wisdom in His word, remembering the futility of your former sins, fight temptation, pursue obedience and faith and love and keeping your eyes fixed on Jesus, the hope of our hearts.
I was about to skil this text but I'm glad i didn't.
This was so well said-thank you,brother.Strength in faith,love in Yeshua!
@@kateshungi8945 me too, and praise God that i didn't
This was great. I really appreciate you sharing this . Very helpful
Thank you ❤️🙏🏻
Thank you! I literally googled how to stop obsessing over my appearance yesterday 😂😂😂😂
Greetings people. I heard this podcast and was drawn to the story about that missionary lady.
I was obsessed with my body that I hated mirrors from 9 to 35 years old. God delivered me to where am very happy with my body and whole being because the creation story in Genesis 1 is my affirmation that I made in his image and are very good in his eyes.
I look in the mirrors daily and see myself through God's eyes literarily and it makes me smile.
Men too can experience freedom from God's word.
Thanks pastor John for such a great insight.
From a young woman: excellent question, excellent answer. Thank you!
I want to be happy with my natural hair. After all it’s the hair God gave me. LORD help me I’m guilty of dealing with this.
Hey, your natural hair is stunning! Don't worry about obsessing over it or not liking it but pray that God will open your eyes to the blessing he has given you in it. You are fearfully and wonderfully made and that includes your hair. A more practical piece of advice would be to look after it how it needs to be looked after (not what others tell you or what youtubers say to do cos everyones hair is different), take time to learn your hair. It's easier to ignore because we can easily hide it with extensions or wigs or whatever but ask God to show you how to look after it. No worry or question of ours is too small or insignificant to Him. Remember that✨💃🏽🙌
@@destinynkechi3053 thank you for your words of encouragement sister. It’s difficult some days. I try not to get so sad about it. It hurts. I would love to rock my natural hair but I haven’t found a way to manage it. It’s just too much. I’m currently trying to nurse my hair back to health. It’s all a new process for me as I’m a new natural. I’ve been praying for healthy hair a lot. I know the Lord is listening. I just need to be patient. Thanks for your support. And thanks for taking your time to encourage me. God bless you sister. 💖
I am not a black person, and not an American person. But I think this hair is beautiful. I have always been thinking. : )
Thank you so so much to the young lady that asked the question ,I have the same issue except I am 37! I have adhd and OCD. My issues with both weight and image has caused a great deal of problems in my life and relationships. I also have ptsd from being in abusive relationships too causing more issues . I wish that I could hug this young woman,and tell her all the things I wish someone told me at that age. Thank you pastor John so much for your wisdom ! I was a cosmologist for 8 yrs trying to help women see themselves better and make them acceptable to society . I HATED that I had to do that tho ! My intention was always to help them feel better about themselves but something never quite felt right about it . last August everything fell apart with my business ,I had begun resenting my job ....the endless mirrors in my salon were literally killing me .I started hating the idea that I was contributing to this non sense even tho my intention was to help ,the industry itself leaves no room for wanting to help" people . my prices got lower ...and lower ...and lower. Because i wanted to help them ! I could not say no when I KNOW how cruel the world is . even tho I was practically broke,my job was so much mor3 rewarding !! These women can't afford this stuff and I started seeing that my job is so bad ! I still tried to keep it together but guess what ....covid ultimately made me stop doing it.fortunately I had already given up my shop ,my lease ended and I was getting raised double rent so I closed last Sept.THANK GOD because I would bE dealing with all that now ! I was working but under a mobile license until march of this year . now I have contemplated a complete career change , I want to help people ,not make them worse and take their money. I became a Christian thus January, I know now that God was looking out for me even before that when I still had the salon .something inside ne pushed me to close ! Now I know why . any way lol sorry for the book but this hit so so close to home. If possible,can you guys do more videos on this subject and maybe we can pray about it together? Thank you either way ! I'm addicted to your channel lol you guys are amazing
So great woman,God be with you!
I have ocd too, I often over think everything! I keep thinking God is mad at me or something, but I constantly keep telling myself makeup is a sin and I’m not going to heaven or it’s an idol. I love beautiful things and makeup but idk if it’s God or just my inner voice. How do I know it’s God? I look at myself and I spend more time watching Christian videos that anything 😂 I just need clarity. Thank you sis for this testimony!
Absolutely one of the most BEAUTIFUL podcasts ever. ( from a 62 year old woman who also has MAKEUP video subscriptions! ). This is so very true! Loving God and others makes one way more beautiful than any man made concoction
I was just asking Jesus help from this last night ...I’m 26 and so tired of obsessing over my physical experience. I’m just like that 19 year old... I tend to look in the mirror a lot because I want to be happy with what I see I try to fix what I call flaws in my mind (if my only my teeth were straight, my nose was smaller) and my irrational logic says that if I one day I am pleased with what I see then I will not focus so much on my exterior and would put more effort on Christ...
@Sofia Bravo I know what you mean; we all tend to emphasize "flaws" in our appearance that others would never notice. But be encouraged - God custom-made every strand of your DNA for His good purpose. (And for what it's worth, if that's you in your profile pic, you're actually really pretty!)
I just checked you out I reckon you need a tooth job and to get that massive honker sorted and then possibly some random bloke whose down on his luck might wander into your web. Are you truly that vain ? Seriously, there’s Jesus dying on that cross so you can inherent eternal life and you say hey tx there Jesus for that and go check out the mirror to see if your acceptable enough of a person for some random bloke you can titillate along because hey he needs to me invigorated bye your wow wow enough to put a ring on it !! Just stop 🛑 STOP STOP STOP ) get your relationship right with Jesus first and then what follows follows )) take it from me I know what I’m talking about, find your identity in Christ not in image or accessories or your saleability ) don’t sell yourself short lass, God first fellas a loooong way second xx
Best Christian Podcast Ever
Lust in the heart of men turns them into evil, unabashed, self-consumed takers, who steal what is most precious; rather than virtuous, upright, sacrificial givers - desiring to have that which is not theirs to take. Lust in the heart of a woman turns them into vain, prideful, and pretentious snares, selfishly giving away what should be kept; rather than meek, quiet, and lovely receivers - desiring to be desired by those who should not desire them.
How tragic that we have failed to address this issue in the church today. Let us repent from this grievous and destructive sin.
Men, in particular. Rise up and speak the truth on this issue, in love, boldly. This falls back onto us, in the Church, O men of God. God will judge the cowardice that so many of us have displayed before Him openly. We are to protect, provide for, and preserve good amongst His people, and we have failed in this.
Enough. I'm tired of the boys. Get over the love for your own life, or stop pretending to love Christ while you watch the Church crumble as it is slowly infested by the rotting poison of the world.
Again, this falls back on us. Salt and light, men. Salt and light.
Repent.
😮😮😮
Amen!
@@danieltait5115 No Bible verses, just common sense and personal experience.
@@justinbirkelo6806 You should back up all your wisdom with the wisdom of God because it does not come from man, the things we know we did not teach ourselves, but they were given to us by the Spirit of God. Give glory to God, not to man and his common 'sense', (of which we have none since we are all so depraved in our sin), so please endeavour in the future to always quote the verses of the bible you've learnt from. Also it's a real benefit to less mature christians as you then encourage them to spend time in it themselves. Thank you.
@@Lethargo226 First and foremost, thank you for your encouragement and admonition. It is well received, and a good reminder to always give glory to God. Nevertheless, I do not see that attributing a truthful statement to 'common sense', or 'personal experience' as something that either robs God of glory, or is less true (despite the fact that even these 'common sensical' truths are in some way rooted in Scriptural truths which are well known and received by those who dwell within the pages of sacred Scripture). If these things which were stated in the original comment were false, or robbed God of glory, then sure. Your comment is well placed. However, it was not. The comment was intended to rebuke the complacency of men within the context of the Church who have allowed these destructive heart conditions to take root in the Church like a cancerous tumor, unaddressed. You, it seems to me, are straining at gnats. Again, I appreciate your zeal for the glory of God; a zeal which I share, dear brother. I would simply encourage you to examine your heart. There may indeed be an overly critical spirit in there which you don't realize is actually contributing to the poison to which I was referring in the original comment above - a heart condition, the destructive power of which I am all too aware of, and am deeply saddened by.
Walk humbly before the Lord, dear brother. :)
I just want to thank you for this powerful message. Women are not the only people that struggle with this. Fitness and body dysmorphia are real struggles that many men won't admit to. Thank you for sharing!
One of the best Ask Pastor Johns. It's not just women that struggle this. More men are. Especially young men, specifically with wanting to look like Marvel Super Heroes.
Completely agree.
I was going to say the same thing! Men are called weird if they acknowledge they struggle with their appearance or self esteem due to the culture.
That's true, I've often struggled with wishing I looked like my favorite Marvel superhero...Rocket Raccoon!
Totally agree Jose.
One of the best ones I've heard . Man now I want to go be a missionary somewhere and just leave all this vanity behind ! God please help us here in america and other places full of vanity to see our true purpose , help us to see the value of our inner man and not just focus on our outward appearance. Amen
Thank you for this response Pastor John. Many young girls (and any age really) need to hear this!
Thank God for letting me hear these stories at this moment.
I praise Jesus and amazing work laid out through desiring god!!!!!!
Being obsessed with yourself is the same reason why people aren’t willing to face persecution for Christ, they love there body more than they love the lord and his will. The physical body is just a tool or vessel used to praise and serve the lord and we are held accountable for the actions we commit within these bodies, but the body is not truly “us”. We will receive new “uncorrupted” bodies in heaven.
I'm a new subscriber. I like this channel & I'm glad it was in my feed. God Bless!!
Thank you pastor for those encouraging stories... I am humbled 🙏🙏🙏
I’m the end, what will matter? Your appearance or your heart for God? He’s not going to judge you by your image but by your heart. Look, wanting to look pretty isn’t a bad thing, it becomes a bad thing once you put that over God. Many call it idolization, and many struggle with that, i struggled with that. So in all of this, your image of what you look like doesn’t matter to the king. It’s your heart, don’t feel like you have to look perfect all the time. Your already a perfect creation in Gods eyes!
I'm so guilty of this, I've been trying to deny it for a long time, but I'm really obsessed with my looks and its becoming a huge issue. I stopped wearing make up though and I'm starting to like the way I look without it but still I'm constantly obsessed with the way I look and the clothes that I wear. Please pray for me 😔😔
God bless you Pastor Piper. Such a wise response. I'm especially moved by your interaction with the disfigured man. God bless you richly.
Sometimes I envision myself running away to India and leaving the pressures of society to look a certain way. It has an impact on feeling accepted and relationships sometimes. How can we not be concerned on our looks when other people point out our looks. Yet, the renewing of the mind and suffering alters that perspective. I am overcoming it and would love to live evryday not being so anxious about it
This is a topic I have been thinking about lately. I agree with some of this, but feel it is a complex issue. I would say even with the church it is difficult for women, because even Christian men really value (or seem to value) whatever they consider to be attractive or beautiful. The pressure keeps building with social media and it's enormous. The short answer I would give is to pray for God's grace to help you stop focusing on appearance AND to pray enjoy God more than the attention of others. There is nothing wrong with painting the barn.
I agree ! Being a millennial or Gen Z woman is REALLY hard. As much as men say they don’t like make up and love natural is super confusing to me. Women who are the farther from natural have massive followings which consist mainly of men. I don’t want that by no means but it makes me feel like that’s how I need to look. 🥺
a small miisssing piece of a puzzle makes it dffcult to complete the entire picture of a puzzle box,Lord always knows what is in best interest for his beleivers.
Men struggle with the same issues whether they want to admit it or not. Not everyone can have the face or figure from TV, magazines or the fake social media posts. One day as I was struggling with my appearance (namely my nose lol) I looked in the mirror and it's like I could hear The Holy Spirit say, " Everytime you look into the mirror and are critical of yourself, you FEED insecurity! Stop feeding insecurity and stop focusing on your flaws!"
Those words have helped me tremendously. I still have setbacks from time to time but everyday I'm looking to STARVE insecurity and comparison and FEED my faith in Jesus who said I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Less looking in the mirror throughout the day definitely helps STARVE the evil spirits of insecurity and low self esteem. God bless anyone who reads this in Jesus name amen!
Amen🏵️
Excellent question and answer John piper, I've struggled on and off with my appearance too at times. This podcast was a God send to many women of this generation and the next!
Ps one key part of healing is never compare yourself to someone else (read psalm 139). Focus of God more!
Also to all the younger girls who struggle with this GET OFF SOCIAL MEDIA.
Finally dear brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.
Phil 4:8
Wow - I needed to hear this ❤
I definitely needed to hear this! Thank you and praise the Lord!
Thank you Pastor John
As a man I can admit we can struggle with this also. I felt like I recently received a blessing in disguise that woke me up and put me back on the correct path towards salvation and it began with me focusing on my health. It has now moved over towards bodybuilding and health and helping my family towards reaching the same goals. I have fought myself admiring some of my progress but being humbled and reminded that it was God who is working through me. Idk if this applies to this directly but is it possible to carry on this mission of helping others and not get caught up in vanity?
He had another podcast answering a question like that
Not comparing yourself to others may help.
N M M Easier said then done. That's like telling someone who's struggling with suicide thoughts to just stop thinking about it. It's sometimes just not that easy
This helps a lot! Comparison is the Thief of Joy.
@@alexianicole7268 suicide is demonic though and I don't think is comparable. The person that is suicidal needs to actively seek prayer from a prayer warrior, call a prayer line.
Ashley M The spirit of comparison is also demonic. Someone who struggles with this should also seek deep prayers. What's minor to you might not be to others. Every Christian has their own struggles
@@alexianicole7268 yup, but suicide is literally more urgent, that's the only point I was trying to make.
Thank you pastor John for this powerful words.
Wow what a story and answer! This isn't just a problem for women but a problem for all of us.
I struggle with this heavily. Thanks for sharing this
Even after being a Christian for over 40 years, when I encourage Godly woman who abides by these principles, I too am
In awe and want what she has ( because I KNOW where it comes from)......
I needed to hear this! Thank you! 🙏🏻
Very hard not to focus on your appearance when it basically determines whether or not someone will want to marry you. It's the difference between finding love and being alone the rest of your life.
As a believer and woman I agree with you. I lost a lot of weight and have a lot of excess skin and fat. How the hell am I supposed to love myself with this excess. Outer appearence is important regardless of what anyone says.
@@EmmeStAnne you worked hard to better yourself!
i suggest to not focus to yourself, it's like thinking "stop thinking the red light", but you still see the red light in your mind. we need to divert our attention to God by reading His word, praying and knowing more of His love. easier said than done but yeah, God will help us.
I struggle with this too 😭 I’m 24 and scared to get fine lines, scars, wrinkles, grey hair etc... I’m always looking at ways to reverse and slow down the ageing process, by buying anti-aging products, having a better diet, doing face messages to prevent wrinkles etc... it’s so draining 😔😔 and sinful because it’s vanity and I’m making this an idol 😩😩
Thanks for this. Praise God
If men stopped weight and age shaming us both in life and online we wouldn't be worried. But men have told us, both directly and by implication, that our value is looks.
help us to see ourselves how you want us to Lord
I have the same problem but I love what I see in the mirror pray for me
Wow, you’re so nice and diplomatic to women! Thank you!
The obsession with one’s physical appearance literally can be one’s demise
wow. very much needed. thank you!
Very important question and answer, as it seems it never stops!
Such an amazing talk! Really enjoyed it. Thanks guys!
Goooood stufff🙌🏻🙌🏻. Thanks for the question and the answer!! Sooooogood
In order to be helpful to our brothers (without diminishing the longer-term struggle of our sisters), can we stop talking as though this problem is exclusive to women - it isn't.
Speaking for myself as well as a lot of mates and acquaintances, we could ALSO do without looking in the mirror so much. All one needs to do is visit a gym to see the problem. Not that the gym itself is necessarily the problem, but it's obvious how much value we men place on aesthetics, and not just when it comes to looking at the opposite sex.
We need prayers for what God has called us John Piper and Carter Conlon.
Father God, thank you for never selling us short and never asking us a favor in return for a curse, thank you for having a complete sane and peaceful mind instead! In accordance with this word and proverbs 31:30, ezekiel 16:15, 2 corinthians 6:14-18 I bind to hell one trusting in or overestimating one's beauty while binding one to a healthy and balanced look at one's beauty and appearances in my life, the lives of my family, friends, colleagues, neighbours, acquitances, opponents and the body of Christ while binding to hell one prostituting one's beauty and giving one's beauty to another, binding to hell every unequal yoke and common share with anyone trusting in and overestimating one's beauty and appearances while prostituting one's beauty and giving one's beauty to another, in the name and blood of Jesus Christ, amen and hallelujah, glory to God ❤:
"'But you trusted in your beauty and used your fame to become a prostitute. You lavished your favors on anyone who passed by and your beauty became his."
Churches often have a culture that implies women have to look a certain way. Change your church culture. And if all the men leave, 😆well then you know why women spend so much time on their clothing and looks. The truth is men value women who are good looking more than women who are good hearted. Men don’t look for a wife or girlfriend at a charity meeting or volunteer group. They look at photos, profiles and “youth” organizations. That’s why there are multi billion dollar makeup and clothing companies, modeling agencies, movie stars, etc. If women want to be seen and not invisible, they have to compete.
A woman who looks “plain” because she is seen as not participating in cultural norms of beauty, which can be ridiculous and extreme, is assumed to be trying to be single or anti male or have some other antisocial attitude.
Thank you
We are the temple of the holly spirit. Clean in and out .
I have a question along the same line. And if they’ve covered this then someone link it to me. But where does physical health fit into a Christian life. And how do you prevent it from becoming an idol?
wow. Beautiful. Powerful. 🙏
Yes I agree and feel the same way too. Except mine isn't just my appearance but also my ethnicity as well. I am Filipino (Asian) and many times I question God why he made me Asian. Why I couldn't just be Caucasian, European, or Hispanic instead. I hated my small narrow eyes, round flat face, thin eyebrows, big lips, and big flat bulbous nose in the center of my face. I hated my features and hated being born Asian. I feel like I am stuck in a body I do not want at all and had no control over. I existed without wanting to be here. Its a horrible feeling. When you want to do God's will and live life to the fullest and then every morning you see in the mirror your reflection. Its disheartening. Its true we can change alkt of things about ourselves. We can live for God, surrender our will for him, change our mindset, change how we live our lives and how we interact with people, work on our diet to be healthy, but our appearance isn't something we can change. We have no control over this and we have no control over the race we are given. I do in a way feel angry at God. I try not to be and see the good, but God is all powerful and with him all things are possible. Yes genetics do play a part into it but also there are people who are incredibly beautiful that look nothing like their parents, there are people born tall while both their parents are short, some born with sharp thin nose while the rest of their close relatives all have flat nose, so its hard to not question. I feel like life would be better of if everyone was created one race and everyone was created equally as beautiful just like angels who God created beautiful.. As much as looks may not be all that important its still nice to actually love myself for me. It is unfair. I know people say its the inner beauty that counts and yes I do believe in that 100% but its hard for me to swallow the fact that if I live my while life in this earth not focusing on my appearance and just sold out for Jesus completely, in heaven for all eternity i will still look the way I do now on earth. I may be younger in heaven and have a glorified body but my race will still be present with me for all eternity and my appearance. So pretty much here on earth and in heaven for all eternity ill have to accept the fact that im naturally unattractive only in heaven it won't hurt because nobody will judge me for my looks or reject me, still though ill always look like this and yes its all true I was handed bad cards in this life and there's nothing much to do about it. There are times when I try to serve God and read my bible and love him and then id see pictures of myself tagged in stuff and I am like is this a joke, I look like a joke. Yes I do feel mad at God. Because out of the nations he could have chosen to put me in it is the Philippines. I look this way and he could have put a soul of mine to a different womb and I am so insecure about my nose. Its unfair. I dont think its right at all. Im sure God is aware that some of his people will get rejected and beaten down because of something they can't control and I know his also aware of some of his children praised for their beauty. I understand looks fade over time but what I do know is this when we enter into heaven we will all look like ourselves in the prime stages of our lives so we carry with us how we look like when we were in our mid 20s or 30s. I am upset about this why? Because the guy I like my coworker and friend he only used me for sex, all this time he likes another girl he had fwb with this entire time he had feelings for her. Just like him she is also the same race, Mexican and she is very beautiful in every way, has many hobbies, and has a great figure. I got pregnant and he didnt want the baby at all and was mad when the girl found out and he lost her. The thing is I couldn't even be mad for the mistreatment, yes it was not right what he did but honestly in reality why would he go for an ugly Asian girl like me when he is handsome himself and can get with any girl whose beautiful in the outside and inside as well. I dont blame him for never liking me and using me. Its the truth. Im more so angry at myself because I hoped, I was just wishful and should have seen it all coming all along that he was not serious and I am not his type, that im an ugly girl. See even myself now I like people and won't call one ugly, but would I date someone I am not at all attracted to ? I wont I may like the person as a friend but I wont be in a relationship with that person because there has to be some sort of attraction at the least. So I do understand why he did what he did, and I know I may not used people like that but can I honestly say looks dont play a roll whatsoever. No. It does to some extent. That's why its very hard. Extremely. Our looks do play a roll in how we are defined in this world, but even then if all people find me ugly why cant I be born beautiful just for even myself to love me and love what I see paired with a good heart on the inside. Why God?!
Wow how are you? I struggle a lot with some of your thoughts and feelings. I am Puerto Rican and look more Indian I rather look like Arab like from Yemen or Egypt 🇪🇬 but it’s ok . I wanted to share so you don’t feel so alone . I struggle alit with my appearance . Hope your feeling okay or feeling better.
Hi, I am European girl and I have the same struggle. Race means nothing. After reading your story I just really want to hug you and fill you with self love just as Christ would do. I am so sad to hear that you hate your race, when I always found Asian, especially Filipinno people so attractive! Everything you are insecure about, nose, eyes, lips, i find all of those things so fine. Don't let those evil spirits to deceive you and convince you that you're less worthy because of looks. I've seen so many times that inner beauty comes on the outside and it becomes seenable too! Christ will do his work. And, don't be bothered about eternity, we're not sure how are we gonna look like, but I'm sure we're all gonna be beautiful and that much satisfied in Christ that it won't matter to us at all :) Life is hard, but try not to put yourself down. Aim to build your strong identity in Christ and that is something that nobody can take from you. Usually, we're not that bothered how we look, but how others percieve us. If you're bothered how will guys see you, remember that God has everything in control and if it is his will and if you treasure nothing but his will for your life, god will find a man that loves you for who you are in Christ. I always tell my self, health=beauty. Do what you can to keep your temple of Holy Spirit healthy. Exercise, eat healthy, sleep, hydrate yourself enough... Keep your head up and back straight. You are loved. Wish you all the best my sister in Christ. Hope to see you one day up there to hug you and you to tell me I was right :) God bless ❤️
I struggle with the same issue as this woman. I've struggled with this from the first day of elementary school since I started being bullied because of my appearance. I had a few friends there though who said I was nice and all but they also eventually stopped being friends with me because they were afraid of being bullied because of me. I truly believe people like Mother Theresa and and other selfless people like her were and are beautiful, but I'm unsure about how many young men would've wanted to marry her in her older years. That said, I believe there's different kinds of beauty in the world. There's the beauty of finding a spouse with good genes who are more likely of producing healthy children or the beauty of Mother Theresa. So unfortunately this did not really answer the question to me. I also often wonder whether this would also make me a bad person for being so appalled by the idea of marrying someone twice my age. Does this make me a bad person for not even giving possibly good kind hearted old men a chance?
Men in our place hate cosmetics. Women only wear make up at their wedding day.......but now,things change. 😥
Timely
If you stare into a mirror.. look into the face of Christ.. this is your single ministry.. 2 Corinthians 3:17-4:1
Great stories in this video.
Excellent! Amen!
thank you for this.
Beauty is vain when choosing wife but it doesnt means beauty is not good. Beauty is good because god created the world beautiful by sight so pursuing outward beauty is good too but not to be obssesive but to be selfcontrolled. Women should wear cloth modest but it dosent mean cloth should not be beautiful
Their character should be humble quiet and gentle but it dosent mean their appearance should not be beautiful.
We must pay attention not to go another extreams
Quiet & humble ? 🤦♀️ And what do you mean their appearance should be beautiful ? People are born the way they are born. A woman can only change that thru plastic surgery ect and most do because so much is put on looks …. How your doing. You are the problem.
Can pastor John to speak on depression and suicide because I have struggled with it since I was 4 and I am 25 right now so I don’t believe god is real but I believe in a higher power
Dear Jon, you being in here is a beautiful act!!!!! It means you are seeking for deliverance and knowledge of God. It reminds me of the people in the Bible who were desperate for the touch of Jesus and they were delivered. I know God has the same for you. I know depression and suicidal thoughts come with the lack of desire to seek God (from where comes our strenght) so, get together with Godly people my friend! People who can pray for you and help you throughout your journey. Try to have daily moments with God (even if it's just a little bit to start with) and, something REALLY IMPORTANT: as you fill yourself with His word and promises, your mouth will also start to get full with His truth, so it will allow you to speak the Word of God over yourself. Speak the promises over yourself!!! The Bible says that our tongue how power to bring life or death. I dealt with panic attacks for over 14 years, and believe me, trusting in God through my actions + speaking life over myself played a really essencial and important role in walking in the freedom Jesus accomplished to us on the cross. And, know He will finish the good work in your life. Keep going my brother! God bless you for He loves you.
Jon, I am praying for you. This was a battle in my life for decades. I am deeply committed Christian, yet still had this devastating malady. I urge you to see a physician who can help with medication. I also encourage you to cry out to the God who created you. He IS real and wants you to know Him. He loves you more than you know and can be found in the Bible. Bless you!!!
Dear Jon ! God is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all you can ask or think according to his mighty power that is within you.! don't give up on God he will reveal himself to you and you will know how much he loves you and how much he cares for you.judt keep seeking and knocking for him ! Just don't. doubt him and even if you does ! Just say God help my unbelief.God bless you.
Hello Jon, I would like to share the gospel with you. I understand your depression as I have felt the same way as well. What you are feeling is the result of a life lived without God. God is real, the earth and the heavens, your conscience and mine, our dissatisfaction with this world all testify that God is real.
We do not in our current state think much about God when we are happy, to thank Him or even consider that we might be grateful, but it is in pain that humanity looks away from it's selfish activity to consider the reality of God.
Suicide is wrong, and it will not give you the release you want, in fact, I'll tell you it will make your pain worse. Life is a gift from God, anyone who destroys life sins against God. And sin is the reason why the world is in the state that it is in right now. And what is sin? Sin is failing to love God as you should, and it shows up in our behaviour, we are law breakers and we have broken God's law.
God's law states:
You will have no other God before God.
You will not worship a false God.
You will not take the name of God in vain.
You will honour your parents.
You will not murder, or hate anyone in your heart.
You will not commit adultery in your body or in your heart.
You will not steal.
You will not lie.
You will not covet, desire anything that belongs to someone else for yourself.
Be honest with yourself, have you kept these laws? I haven't, I have also broken them. The way it goes, when you break one law, you have broken them all, as all sin comes from a failure to love God as you should.
But there is hope, because the God of the bible, the true God is “The Lord, the Lord, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness, keeping steadfast love for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, but who will by no means clear the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children and the children’s children, to the third and the fourth generation.” (Ex 34;6-8).
So God is a God of mercy. And this is His mercy: (John 3:16) “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life." In His mercy, He has made a way for sinners to be forgiven.
The message of the gospel is; acknowledge your sin, repent and ask for God's forgiveness, hope for it, seek it, pray for it, seek God until He grants you eyes to see Jesus for who He truly is, start reading the bible with Matthew and begin seeking this forgiveness and mercy and hope. God has promised to give good things to those who ask Him, believe He exists and ask Him for the Holy Spirit and He grant Him to you. So ask and ask and knock until you get it, if you seek Him, He will come.
The reward of the gospel is being with God in heaven, where there will be no sickness, or death, or trouble, or evil, or crying, or unhappiness of any kind.
@@belpri633 I appreciate it but I don’t believe in god but I believe in a high power
Amazing stories! 😢
Do you have a fellowshiping place in toronto canada??
I have body dysmphoric disorder
🙏🏻 praying you will be completely set free in Jesus name❤️
@@Dibdib35 in agreement 8n jesus of Nazereth Name Amen
I had an all man, God fearing cowboy tell me once "I like my women stock".
9:30 I wouldn’t have ever dare say that to him, that’s really rude. “And am not put off by your looks”. Seriously?Mentioning that is very wrong and was not necessary. You probably never saw him again because he wanted to avoid ever meeting you again. I just don’t like how you phrased the way you talked to him in general.
Overall, yes your message is good, it’s the inside that counts, but also outward appearances do play a role, you can take Esther for example and all the beauty treatments she and the rest of the ladies who competed with her did. Also Jacob and his love for Rachel because of her beauty.
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Having a desire to be Beautiful is very dangerous!! Let's take a look at God's Word on this. There are many of God's prophet's who tell about Idols. Jeremiah 10 says, They cut down a tree, and a craftsman carves an Idol and then they fasten it securely with hammer and nails so it won't fall over. Their gods are like scarecrows in a cucumber field! Do you know what this is about? God often uses trees to express people. Can a good tree bring forth bad fruit? The tree of life. When our Lord healed a blind man, he first saw people like trees walking around after Jesus placed his hands on him the first time. The parable of the fig tree and so on. Now, when you cut down a tree, this means to pick one individual out of many and you highly esteem that person. Look at a model, what do the photographers do? They dress her up and make her or him look fabulous. Or you might have a certain movie star that you hang up on your wall. Or it may be yourself that you adorn and worship. You have made an Idol. You have committed Idolatry. Guess what the Lord made me do once? I had always wanted very long hair, and finally I had it. But the Lord saw that I loved it too much. So one fine day, as always I was listening to a sermon on Idolatry. The Lord mercyfully showed me my Idol, it was my hair and my outward appearance. I was convicted. I had prayed the day before that if I had any idols, that God would show me. Well he did and I cut my hair short. It was very hard, but God gave me strength to do it. I was so relieved afterward. I gave much thanks to God for that. Let us be very careful not to provoke our Lord with our abominal Idols. He desires to take first place in your heart. He will have ALL your heart or none of it. All or nothing. Thanks pastor John!!!
So good!
I love this but the majority of men I see like women who wear a ton of make up and who have completely altered their body. The more they are altered the more follower they have … millions upon millions. Being a millennial or Gen Z woman is extremely hard. 🥺
Should I stop lifting weights
Not if you're doing it purely for vanity which most people don't cos it's quite good for you anyway
@@Lyonessi I want to look good but at the same time I want to become a better fighter
It depends on what the result is. If you find that you are constantly admiring yourself in the mirror, then I would say yes.
Don't get in your head too much about it. Ask God to keep your heart in check about your motivations. Putting on muscle will help prevent bone loss in your future, it helps with depression, and helps cognitive functioning. It's a long term investment in your health! I struggle with this too❤
Jesus Promised to Deliver us from evil..Just Ask Jesus to deliver you.
Wow
Sorry Pastor I don't know these men that don't care for their woman to wear make up and such. Saved or not. Well, that isn't true. Married men over 68 years old don't seem to care. Men seem to love having a wife who knows how to properly wear make up which includes color.
Do you stare at yourself in the mirror? do you have mirrors all over the house? how much time do you spend putting on makeup n doing your hair every day? think about that. Its reasonable to put on makeup n do your hair in the morning and to touch it up IF you are going out in the evening for a social or work meeting. BUT if you stare at yourself every time u go by a mirror that can be telling you you are obsessing about your looks. Nothing wrong with looking good or put together nicely. BUT TOO much makeup; an extreme hair style/color etc; piles of jewelry; total skin tight clothing; that whole look is TOOOO much!! I do my hair n makeup ONCE a day, glance in the mirror several times a day but ONLY if there is a mirror where Im going FOR another purpose; I generally comb my hair ONCE every 24 hrs thats all and i have long hair. wearing makeup or jewelry or nice clothes is NOT a crime or a sin; but TOO much of any or all of those items can lead to obsession and problelms. There was once a great rather tense debate among the women of a lg church I went to regarding makeup etc. The pastor got fed up with this and said at the next sermon, if the barn needs painting then PAINT IT!! matter closed! I have been called eye candy...but only from people who had wives that totally did not look after themselves; and certainly not in my older years. moderation is the key, like anything!
suffisament ?
😭😭😭
❤
John, what you said to that man was conveying to him that you did take issue with his deformity and that you were attempting to appeal to his spirit and person and not to the one in us that is no respector of persons to whom our worship is appealing, if our heart is in it. Your heart seems to be right but steadaly bumping in to the door frame and wall just flickering the light switch as you bounce back from it trying to go through. If you actually have found Jesus the way is narrow. Have you figured out why you never saw him again after that. ........hey I know your ugly but I'm gonna over look that and still explain God to you...... John, what kind of bread is that with mold on it.
Grow up ! Ego and pride make you an enemy of God..don't get me wrong..some people are beautiful naturally but they respect themselves and have modesty (:
I was genuinely looking forward to this and then I realised it was a weird religious thing so I stopped listening
Im pretty sure Mother Teresa was born a man.