Adopting From Foster Care: Steps To Take
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- Опубліковано 8 вер 2020
- Adopting from foster care: steps to take // Are you thinking about adopting from foster care? Adoption is a wonderful way to grow your family and to open your home to children who need a loving mother and father. Most people don’t know that there are options when considering foster care adoption. You can foster to adopt or just adopt! In this video, I will explain the steps you will need to take and how you can adopt foster care kids from the foster care system.
#adoptingfromfostercare #adoption #Lucrecebundy
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Websites mentioned in the video:
Heart gallery of America
www.heartgalleryofamerica.org...
Other adoption videos:
Foster care vs. adoption: what’s the difference
• Foster Care vs Adopti...
How to fund your adoption
• How to fund your adopt...
How much does it cost to adopt a child?
• HOW MUCH DOES IT COST ...
Adoption a baby process: how to get started
• Adopting A Baby Proces...
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• Adopting From Foster C...
Adopting through foster care is not as fast and simple as this video makes it’s sound. You have to be matched with a child and that process for us has been long and we have still not been matched and don’t know when we will be matched.
Thanks so much for making what I presume a very hard and emotionally draining process and making it more simple and easy to go through!
Great video! This is really helpful. Thanks for sharing!
Our distant relative called us up a while back freaking out that her grandchildren who we heard about for years were being taken from birth mom. We accepted to care for them. Going into it the child care system literally promised us that we would be adopting them as there were no chances mom could get her sh*t together enough to support 4 children, especially with proof that she just wanted them for the state money she received. The care worker lied to us multiple times and said she would file the papers for adoption and kept slacking. She finally filed the adoption papers. The day after that we got a call that they found birth dad who we were promised was in prison for domestic abuse- the children never met him. He did not want them until our case worker told him he would get a monthly income for them, and then he said he wanted them. For a week we spent most of what we had on lawyers. We finally had a court room appointment where mom was given permission to decide where they would go- which is BS because she is on disability income for being “ mentally ill “ ( she was deemed not mentally ill, and admitted it was her excuse because she can’t keep a job. ) She decided to go with us because she did not want them to leave ten hours to Ohio. At the end of the meeting they explained to her she would need to go to weekly meetings, and she absolutely lost it when they told her the kids state income would not go to her. We spent that night celebrating and told them again they would stay with us. The next morning we woke up to the case worker saying dad was driving ten hours from Ohio to pick them up because brith mom changed her mind, and spent all night working out a plan with birth dad that she would continue to get most of their money if they went with him... they left our arms balling their eyes out. Just a week before when the adoption papers were filed we told them the news and they jumped in joy, and asked to call us mom dad sissy etc. They were 4 & 6. The first few days with us they were taught how to brush their teeth, wipe, and be nice to the dogs. The 4 year old choked multiple times eating his first few meals and couldn’t understand when we told him he could finish and have seconds. They absolutely freaked out over their new wardrobes and all their toys, saying they never saw anything like it. They came to us with only the clothes they had on, 4 year old’s underwear were tight and had mold. The first time I did the girl’s hair I let her pick her hairstyle ( they are biracial ) and she got so excited when I bought her de tangler and hair products because her hair had never been done much and was neglected. Hell you should have seen them when we gave them their first baths. They kept asking ten times a day for the first few weeks to take a bath because they weren’t used to them. I miss them more than anything and am struggling. We had to cancel their bunk bed preorder when they left in August, and I had to cancel the $300 custom American girl/boy dolls I was going to surprise them with this Christmas. They never had their own beds and shared one twin bed with a 12 year old and a BABY. 4 of them. Just a twin mattress on the floor. I remember the second day here they were fighting so bad so I asked them both nicely to sit on the couch for a minute and think about what they could do to play nice and share. I will never forget how they both looked at me then started screaming and crying. After holding them both on my lap the six year old explained to me that many people would tell them to sit in a corner and then would “ beat “ them after and then I had to promise them we would never ever lay a hand on them. I will never forget these kids. I still cry every night and listen to the songs they like and have their drawings on the fridge. We finally decided against the impossible and took a foster class the other night and will ( most likely ) get our license in 6-9 months. We want to adopt, but know the risks involved. In the end I am absolutely broken for life and feel like my own two kids got ripped from my arms. We have called them once after they left, where they told us they were sleeping on a dirty air mattress. Dad blocked us on everything after that even though he promised to keep in touch. I don’t know how they are or if they are okay. I will never heal, but I know there are other kids out there who can benefit from being with us, just like these kids did. And I hope even though they are very young that they will not forget us and forget what we showed them.
💔 I hope you get to see them again.
@@virginianatalie2879 thank you for your wishes, we just got a call they are being escorted back to our state 🙏🏻😭😭
@@shayrose7705 so sorry to hear that, I have been looking into fostering to adopt & this is my worst fear to see a child go to a home where I know for a fact they won’t be cared for & not be able to do anything about it 🥺 Hope you are healing and doing well & maybe be able to see them one day again ❤️
This absolutely breaks my heart 😭 I really hope that you get to see them again.
@shayrose7705 once they were escorted, were you able to get them back?
Such an interesting video, thanks for posting to help kids in need.
Thank you so much for sharing!!
This is great!
Thank You So Much
Blessings
Great information and explained clearly! We will definitely share this info to those who need answers on foster adoption.
Please do!
Our family has completed all that was required but still waiting on the home study to be done.We have been put on a list for an investigator. I have found a sibling group and cannot inquire until the home study is complete. Big bummer....
I love your videos! Thank you for taking time to educate us all and lending an ear. You're amazing!
Thank you so much! Yea the system could work quicker...not sure why it takes so long
very happy you speak about the logical way of adopting from foster care first. its something crucial for folks looking to adopt, and not foster, need to know. now states are different. in NY if you want to adopt through the public system, even a child who is already freed, you will need to be certified as foster first, in order to comply with the law and allow the child to be placed with you for the early phase - pre-adoption period. foster care is about the reunionification of the bio family, if your goal is not to work towards that goal than don't do "foster to adopt" because 4 out of 5 children who enter foster care will be reunited with their bio family. if thats your goal you will be happy and have done something wonderful, but if your goal was to adopt that child you will be heartbroken. thats an 80% chance your heart will be broken. lesson? know your goal, state it to the agency and tell them you only want to consider children already freed. there are over 129,000 across the USA in institutions and non-adoptive foster homes waiting.
Tennessee also requires folks to go through all the foster parent training before eligibility to adopt a waiting child or sibling group from the state system. I’m starting my training in January and plan on adopting a waiting child or waiting sibling group. I think the training requirement is actually a great thing. It’s unfortunate that there is no “fast track” training available. It takes two months to get through all of the training which seems like a lot of time when that means that waiting kiddos stay in the system that much longer. Imagine a world where the training could be accomplished in one week or three days of intensive class work. As an online teaching specialist at a flagship university, I just see so much potential for streamlining the process and making it less cumbersome. That would lead to less waiting time for the kids. That said, I want to reaffirm that I think the training requirement is absolutely necessary and well after I adopt, I will be continuing to educate myself on trauma-informed parenting, adoption psychology, and child development. Kids are not projects, but they definitely deserve parents who are committed to learning and evolving.
I was thinking about adopting a child when I'm single and now I'm already married with one child but still wanting to adopt one so maybe I will pursue this next year. Thank you for sharing this info. It's so helpful.
That's so great @seahaltura! I’m launching a new hands-on group coaching program in October on how to start your adoption process in less than 6 weeks even if you have no idea where to start. I think you may be perfect for it, if you want to chat about it! I'd love to hop on a call with you and chat more about this :)
Can I learn more about this coaching program? Thanks
@@leiz.6103 Yes of course! I am actually starting registration for it tomorrow. I will send you the link now, but please keep in mind that it won't be fully ready until tomorrow. hopefuladoptiveparentsbootcamp.com/register
Wow!
This is such a theme that I love. But I am in UK.
This is amazing video! Also want to say thank you to the families who adopt children!
Can you make a video on adopting as a single person? Adoption is something in my long term plans. I have a long term partner but we are not looking to adopt together nor are we going to be getting married. Are rules different if we live together vs live solo?
We are currently raising my two biological children together but i have joint custody with their bio father so he has no legal status with them.
Down road would like to adopt solo though possibly sharing a home with my partner (though we have talked about seperate homes for years too).
Thanks for watching! Do you have any questions about steps to take to adopt a child from foster care? Join my free adoption resource community here 👇🏾👇🏾
facebook.com/groups/adoptionsupportandresourcecommunity/
If I adopt a foster child from another state does the child have benefits that are offered from our state or the state we are adopting them from?
Hello! We became foster parents back in 2003 and have fostered children in Idaho as well as Alaska. We adopted sisters whom we fostered for 3 years back in 2011. We are now in the process of adopting our girls' biological brother before he ages out of the system. He was in a failed adoption in another state but very much wanted by us! We started our ICPC paperwork back in September 2020 and as of today we are still in the middle of both states not processing the paperwork. We already have a current home study and background check! Any suggestions to your knowledge on how long this should take?
Thank you very much for your videos!
Hello! I love your heart for adopting and I am so sorry the process is taking so long. I wish I could shorte it for you but unfortunately we are all at the mercy of the system 😔
If you adopt from Foster care do they help financially and for how long? Also what is the age limit for the oarents to be?
Can you choose to foster one child first that is eligible for adoption and then adopt them?
Is there a certain age you have to be to adopt?
I want to adopt a little girl 😩
is it possible for a USA PR holder to adopt a child?
i wanna adopt 8 kids or even more, is there any limit
Regarding the children who are eligible for adoption…why can’t we adopt over state lines if we are parents who have a loving home and across the state line there is a child who needs a home, why is it so, so, so difficult to adopt that child? We’re licensed foster parents who want to adopt, but have not yet found a child who we can adopt.
If I am living and working in the USA but I do not have American Nationality, can I adopt from foster care? I am from Spain
Hello Lucrece, thanks for your videos! They are very helpful! We are considering adopting directly from the foster care system, but I’m a bit confused about what type of agencies I should be looking for. Some agency told me they do not handle adoption and only do strict foster care. I had a hard time finding an agency so far. Also, do we need to get a different license to adopt than to foster? Thanks a lot!
Hello! I love that you are considering foster care adoption :) You will need to pick the type of adoption you want to do...do you want to be a foster parent and if the opportunity arises, adopt your foster child? Or do you want to skip the fostering part and adopt directly from the state?
Lucrece Bundy We would like to adopt directly from the foster care system.
Do you know what type of agencies we should look for in this case? Is there a difference between foster care agency vs adoption from foster care agency?
Sadly adoption out right from my research is crazy expensive. Becoming a foster parent and accepting an opening is much less expensive. Just a longer process.
Should I bother reaching out to the case worker of the child I’m interested in right now? Or should I wait until the home study and classes are done?
It's up to you...you will need to be home-study approved for sure so it might be best to wait. What state are you in?
Thank you for replying!! I’m in Oklahoma. I’m very new to this. The child we are interested in adopting is in SD, so I’m not even sure if we’re allowed to adopt him? It says he’s up for any states as long as you are a member of a recognized Indian tribe and my husband is, and as long as you’re willing to drive for pre placement visits. He has no family, so visitation with bio family wouldn’t be an issue according to the paragraph with his picture. We’re totally new, and definitely not getting our heart set on anything or any child. We just want to open our hearts and home to a child in need!
How does out of state adoption work?
Contact the state you want to adopt from and ask them what you need to do.
Is there ever any newborns in foster care
Greetings, I live in ILLINOIS. Can I choose kids from other state?
Hey! yes absolutely you can. Are you considering adoption?
Lucrece, in the case of adopting a waiting child, can we possibly adopt from another state? Thanks!
Yes you absolutely can!
@@Lucrecebundy How should we go about it?
Can someone from abroad is also eligible to adopt a child in USA? example, I am from Philippines and I want to adopt from USA, is that possible? Just curious. Thank you.
You know, that's a great question that I have actually never thought about before. I'll do some research on this and probably do a video on it. I have been getting a lot of questions about that.
Hello I have a question How do I adopt a child from Foster care child out of state?
I will be doing a video on this soon.
Let those cases be reopened and reevaluated
Thou shalt not kidnap look it up people
I get that you are making your living off of the transfer of children. Have you ever talked to adult adoptees about their losses due to adoption? I know most people don't want to listen to us. Do you tell your clients the failure rate for older child adoption is as high as 24%? Do you explain that all adoption is trauma for the child? Foster care is meant to provide temporary care until children can be reunified with their family, not as a resource for adults wanting to take other people's children. Those foster children don't understand what they're losing in exchange for stable care. Their original identity, extended family including siblings, extended family, sealed original birth certificate, medical, family & genealogical history. Adoption is child trafficking. Me=Former foster child adopted through foster care. Stolen from a fit and loving mother.