I agree for 50% :) I think that a person has more influence on the other person than he thinks... ex. yesterday my SO was in a very bad mood after work.. I was just myself - neutral mood, at the end of dinner my mood was the same as my partners.. and it got worse until we went to sleep.. And he has affected my mood in a good way aswell (obviously ;) )... so let's say that when he gets home and he has a bad mood again, and I actually take into account that he has a bad mood and instead of continuing our evening like any other evening, I just give him space or... than at least I am not in a bad mood AND I haven't made his mood worse, meaning we wouldn't have fought... Anyhow, I'm not a psychiatrist, so maybe this is a bad example (and bad word:) but I agree that it would work better when both people take the advice, but it can also help if only one of both does :)
I feel abandoned , I am a hail storm and I was ready to walk out until I found your videos. Hopefully my husband will want to watch and we can start to repair 4 years of the same old same old issues . Thank you
Hi Moon... I'm in a hail storm of reactive, unfair fighting from a lot of resentment from my mate for the past 9years ...this video made me feel so much hope. I was wondering if you & your husband tried these videos?
Love this guy. It is actually my first time listening this kind of stuff about relationship problem and it completely makes sence. It just gave me the hope I was looking for. Thank you so much for making this video 😊👏
Great video. All basic stuff but when you're knee deep in the shit you forget a lot of this stuff and get caught up in what's happening. Helped me a lot, thank you.
One way to solve the you-forgot-to-take-out-the-trash type of arguments is a simple reminder. No nastiness in the voice for them to react to. The solution for the you-didn't-kiss-me-when-you-got-home type is to go up to them for a kiss. No need for any arguing at all. We've been married 44 years. We have trained ourselves to not have arguments but to have discussions about our differences. No raised voices, no snarky comments, no lashing out. All of that is unproductive. And in all of the years we've been married he has NEVER EVER called me names. Name-calling is also unproductive in arguing. This is the way we respect and listen to each other. We also use the fair-fighting rule we learned in marriage counseling in our first year of marriage. We don't bring in issues unrelated to the problem. (No more "Your mom is driving me crazy" and "Well, your sister plays piano when I'm sleeping.") We wish the marriage counselor had taught us the other fighting rules we use. We had to discover them ourselves over many years of fighting. It would have saved us A LOT of problems had we always known them.
Ugh I'm the hail storm bitch lol, and he's the turtle bore...funny how these two individuals always end up together haha :p. I love my turtle though and I think he loves the storm queen too, but we really need to get past this power struggle stage. Only good thing is that we're decently mature just need to get over my pride and him his insecurity due to his previous relationship (ex cheated), thanks for your help! And best of luck to all us storm queens and turtles ;p
Bruce: missing in this I think is the aspect of how do we know if we like the other person enough, are compatible enough, to make it worthwhile to go through the process with them?
Hey Bruce. That was a phenomenal couple of videos which has greatly restored my hope for the Revival of the relationship with the one I love. We are only at the 8th month stage so I guess you could say that we are at the end of romance and beginning of power struggle . So reassuring to know that at this is is a long-term Project with stages and a goal at the end of the day. Looking forward to listening to more videos. Bless you my friend.
This was so good to hear. because we are exactly in the power struggle stage. The example at the end was very clarifying. Please use more real and specific examples because it makes it a lot more clearer and applicable. Thank you
sent this to another couple I know who are really struggling have been for 5 years and i sent it to my husband. Some people spend so much time maybe even money to get help but in how you say what you say it is actually simpler then people really get as long as they are two willing people with open minds for self help to. Love your videos send me anything you have
We have not yet fought... but its coming i think, i feel our romance stage is coming to an end . I want it to last so i have looked for videos to make sure we make it work! Thank you!
Im a hailstorm my husband is a turtle and you got it exactly right about the effects they have and why they happen and you are a man so this is even cooler coming from you.
I'm a hailstorm and I think this is his reason for hiding things from me, because he's scared that I will get angry and scream at him. but this would of worked if he loved me enough to try for me, he's just simply given up and I can't do anything anymore if he tells me he doesn't want a future with me
LilysBeautyTips just hang in there,remember u cannot clap your hand with one hand ,it take both hands to make noise,another word if u try very hard and the other person not even try,the situation is going NOWHERE!!!Good luck
What if any one of the partner is following your advice who is in trouble and other who is disconnected is unaware of your theory? I too think that any relationship advice will be effective if both are aware of your advice. Also better to follow Joseph Murphy's book, "Power of Your Subconscious Mind".
This piece is impressively insightful. A book with analogous content was a significant journey for me. "The Art of Meaningful Relationships in the 21st Century" by Leo Flint
OMG ijust saw one of your videos and now im hooked on you ... Im so sad and deeply hurt. I feel like I'll always be stuck in the power struggle. My boyfriend/ex-fiance makes me feel unloved and like he'll always love his ex-fiance
I happened to have a quick conversation with the man I'm seeing now for only a month. I notice one of the notions he mentions often in regards to where we are in relationship....is ' don't over analize it.' I honestly don't but I wonder if he sees communicating feelings as analizing? I do not know.
You're videos talk about how to handle each when both sides comply to one another... but I don't see anything on how to handle when or side is trying to move forward but the other refuses to comply
I'm pretty sure that myself and my ex-partner were both hailstorms. Does this happen? Is there ever a time where as a Coach you are thinking: "you guys need to seriously throw in the towel now". I'm sure you'd never say it, but I'm curious whether you always feel that there is hope, or whether in some cases people just need to walk away?
my bf constantly feel insure about i am always looking for other guys . we are going around the same circle for 1.5 years. can you help me please? thank you
Is it possible to get some videos in FRENCH? i want to show them to my partner but she does not understand ENGLISH. P.S My partner works in another country we see each other 1-2 months a years.(What do you think about long distant relationships?) we've been "together" 3 years now. And i'm the "storm" in this relationship -complaining about her not calling or showing any sign of careness. WHAT TO DO?
Bruce nice video... can u help me.. me and my wife got into a big fight a month ago not physically,just talking..but now i cant talk to her .She doesn't want to respond to my talk.. we sleep like roommate right now..she sleep with my 5 years old daughter.. we dont talk,only about kids ... nothing else.. Bruce i have to be real with u man ... Right now i feel like i want to throw a flag.. but i have 3 kids.. thats what make me think.. btw she took her ring off a month ago.. .. I LOST .. PLEASE GIVE ME SOME ADVICE ...
Bruce I loved him and he loved me too .. Now he says that all his feelings have fade away.. And he said to be good friends again.. So how can I get him back?
@@sebb447 Immediately after you signed up you were sent an email that contains a link to the videos. On that page, select "Video 2" from the navigation bar. Beneath video 2 is the PDF you are looking for.
Occasional conscious fighting to be fair. sometimes you find you both saying the same thing. in a round about way like you finally understand each other after all that huff and puff ..or you got a point there what shall we do about...sometimes we dont listen😂😂😂😂😂
Immediately after you signed up you were sent an email that contains a link to the videos. On that page, select "Video 2" from the navigation bar. Beneath video 2 is the PDF you are looking for.
any relationship advice will only work if both people take the advice
I agree for 50% :) I think that a person has more influence on the other person than he thinks... ex. yesterday my SO was in a very bad mood after work.. I was just myself - neutral mood, at the end of dinner my mood was the same as my partners.. and it got worse until we went to sleep.. And he has affected my mood in a good way aswell (obviously ;) )... so let's say that when he gets home and he has a bad mood again, and I actually take into account that he has a bad mood and instead of continuing our evening like any other evening, I just give him space or... than at least I am not in a bad mood AND I haven't made his mood worse, meaning we wouldn't have fought...
Anyhow, I'm not a psychiatrist, so maybe this is a bad example (and bad word:) but I agree that it would work better when both people take the advice, but it can also help if only one of both does :)
I'm stack in "Power Struggle" stage. It's very hard to feeling hurt.
I hope it worked out.
I feel abandoned , I am a hail storm and I was ready to walk out until I found your videos. Hopefully my husband will want to watch and we can start to repair 4 years of the same old same old issues . Thank you
Did this ever work for you and your husband?
Hi Moon... I'm in a hail storm of reactive, unfair fighting from a lot of resentment from my mate for the past 9years ...this video made me feel so much hope. I was wondering if you & your husband tried these videos?
Love this guy. It is actually my first time listening this kind of stuff about relationship problem and it completely makes sence. It just gave me the hope I was looking for. Thank you so much for making this video 😊👏
Fantastic set of marriage building blocks. I am 15 years in to my second marriage and realise why my first marriage of 23 years ran out of steam.
Great video. All basic stuff but when you're knee deep in the shit you forget a lot of this stuff and get caught up in what's happening. Helped me a lot, thank you.
I am so grateful right now. I feel like this video is exactly what I needed to see
God Bless You xx
One way to solve the you-forgot-to-take-out-the-trash type of arguments is a simple reminder. No nastiness in the voice for them to react to. The solution for the you-didn't-kiss-me-when-you-got-home type is to go up to them for a kiss. No need for any arguing at all. We've been married 44 years. We have trained ourselves to not have arguments but to have discussions about our differences. No raised voices, no snarky comments, no lashing out. All of that is unproductive. And in all of the years we've been married he has NEVER EVER called me names. Name-calling is also unproductive in arguing. This is the way we respect and listen to each other. We also use the fair-fighting rule we learned in marriage counseling in our first year of marriage. We don't bring in issues unrelated to the problem. (No more "Your mom is driving me crazy" and "Well, your sister plays piano when I'm sleeping.") We wish the marriage counselor had taught us the other fighting rules we use. We had to discover them ourselves over many years of fighting. It would have saved us A LOT of problems had we always known them.
Ugh I'm the hail storm bitch lol, and he's the turtle bore...funny how these two individuals always end up together haha :p. I love my turtle though and I think he loves the storm queen too, but we really need to get past this power struggle stage. Only good thing is that we're decently mature just need to get over my pride and him his insecurity due to his previous relationship (ex cheated), thanks for your help! And best of luck to all us storm queens and turtles ;p
Bruce knows what he is talking sbout
Bruce: missing in this I think is the aspect of how do we know if we like the other person enough, are compatible enough, to make it worthwhile to go through the process with them?
trial and error, emphasis on try first
Can you believe only 100k have watched this? So many people need to see this
Thank you man, you just explained to me the answer to my problems!
THANK YOU SO MUCH!
Hey Bruce. That was a phenomenal couple of videos which has greatly restored my hope for the Revival of the relationship with the one I love. We are only at the 8th month stage so I guess you could say that we are at the end of romance and beginning of power struggle . So reassuring to know that at this is is a long-term Project with stages and a goal at the end of the day. Looking forward to listening to more videos. Bless you my friend.
Wow thank you for this insightful video. I'm a hailstorm,and now I see why I broke up with my ex. There's a lot inner work to do,thanks Bruce.
This was so good to hear. because we are exactly in the power struggle stage. The example at the end was very clarifying. Please use more real and specific examples because it makes it a lot more clearer and applicable. Thank you
I thought it was very good advice. Fighting is the most destructive thing in any relationship and we need to learn effective ways to handle it.
I love your work Bruce! You give such incredible insight into relationships. So glad I found you. ❤
You Saved my relationship with my true love !!!
I ow you big time.. Thanx
Thank you. Thank you, thank you 🙏 I have always broken up during the power struggle phase. Guess everyone is being called to GROW
sent this to another couple I know who are really struggling have been for 5 years and i sent it to my husband. Some people spend so much time maybe even money to get help but in how you say what you say it is actually simpler then people really get as long as they are two willing people with open minds for self help to. Love your videos send me anything you have
If you would like to have more of Bruce's free products join Bruce's mailing list (for free) at www.LoveAtFirstfight.com.
I had a man kept bringing up the past. Had different people in our lives cant really let them go
I'm starting to understand myself an understanding my love of my life
We have not yet fought... but its coming i think, i feel our romance stage is coming to an end . I want it to last so i have looked for videos to make sure we make it work! Thank you!
Im a hailstorm my husband is a turtle and you got it exactly right about the effects they have and why they happen and you are a man so this is even cooler coming from you.
You have moved me to tears. I m in love with your videos.
I'm a hailstorm and I think this is his reason for hiding things from me, because he's scared that I will get angry and scream at him. but this would of worked if he loved me enough to try for me, he's just simply given up and I can't do anything anymore if he tells me he doesn't want a future with me
LilysBeautyTips just hang in there,remember u cannot clap your hand with one hand ,it take both hands to make noise,another word if u try very hard and the other person not even try,the situation is going NOWHERE!!!Good luck
LilysBeautyTips it's ok let him go n believe me if it's meant to be he will come back
I really like this guy's approaches
Is there a limbo stage of complacency within the power struggle? I feel like that's where I am, I just exist in the relationship.
Very insightful. I hope to introduce this to my partner & see how it works for us
You were actually talking to me.
Its so real.
Thanks to your advice I found the answer to my questions. I'm glad my friends found it veeeery helpful too. Thank you. :)
What if any one of the partner is following your advice who is in trouble and other who is disconnected is unaware of your theory? I too think that any relationship advice will be effective if both are aware of your advice. Also better to follow Joseph Murphy's book, "Power of Your Subconscious Mind".
This piece is impressively insightful. A book with analogous content was a significant journey for me. "The Art of Meaningful Relationships in the 21st Century" by Leo Flint
Thank you so much . It was really amazing . Your analysis was spot on. 😊👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👍🏻
I am so grateful & thank you
OMG ijust saw one of your videos and now im hooked on you ... Im so sad and deeply hurt. I feel like I'll always be stuck in the power struggle. My boyfriend/ex-fiance makes me feel unloved and like he'll always love his ex-fiance
Your videos are so helpful! thank you, Bruce!
thank you sooo much your awesome!:) gonna share these vids with my love I think its gonna help us a lot :)
finally...i found what i was searching for last years👍👍👍
thank u so much.... 've been goin through a lot in my relationship.... diz helped me a lot!
Where’d you go?
Thank you advice both conaction and happy love to come in a couple together .
I loooove ur videos you just gave me so much hope I'm definitely in the power struggle
Wonderful advice. Glad I found these videos..
Thank you for your insights! I need them.
This is how relationships shoukd be portrayed.
it is so informative. Am going through all that, am sure it will help me
This is so absolutely true
I happened to have a quick conversation with the man I'm seeing now for only a month. I notice one of the notions he mentions often in regards to where we are in relationship....is ' don't over analize it.' I honestly don't but I wonder if he sees communicating feelings as analizing? I do not know.
thank you for your words of wisdom God bless you😇
You're videos talk about how to handle each when both sides comply to one another... but I don't see anything on how to handle when or side is trying to move forward but the other refuses to comply
I'm pretty sure that myself and my ex-partner were both hailstorms. Does this happen? Is there ever a time where as a Coach you are thinking: "you guys need to seriously throw in the towel now". I'm sure you'd never say it, but I'm curious whether you always feel that there is hope, or whether in some cases people just need to walk away?
awesome and free advice
am so lucky that I saw this video
I have no flesh. No carnal sensation. I wish no relationship without this. Excuse my being blunt.
The hidden formula gem!! 😲😃❤🎉🎈
Brilliant. Generous and insightfull
I'm a hailstorm and he's a turtle :p This video is spot on
Thank you Bruce
awesome ! very helpful. thankful
How do 2 turtles fight? Do we both just suppress it and then become dead inside?
Bruce, i need advice from you. How can I recover my marriage we separated 8 year ago and he married another women illegally? thank you
Thank you very much
thank you
I love this video, SO helpful. I cannot find the exercise in the pdf link below; can you please guide me to get this. thanks
It was very insightful and I found out that I am the hailstorm and my husband is the turtle.
I’m a hailstorm, and he’s the turtle
Aww I'm so that, how do we get past the power struggle zone ugh
my bf constantly feel insure about i am always looking for other guys . we are going around the same circle for 1.5 years. can you help me please? thank you
I am.having problems with.my.relationship and I am.going thru the stages of a relationship ans need help
were is the PDF file
You can find the .pdf file by joining Bruce's mailing list (for free) at www.LoveAtFirstfight.com.
Is it possible to get some videos in FRENCH? i want to show them to my partner but she does not understand ENGLISH. P.S My partner works in another country we see each other 1-2 months a years.(What do you think about long distant relationships?) we've been "together" 3 years now. And i'm the "storm" in this relationship -complaining about her not calling or showing any sign of careness. WHAT TO DO?
Bruce nice video... can u help me.. me and my wife got into a big fight a month ago not physically,just talking..but now i cant talk to her .She doesn't want to respond to my talk.. we sleep like roommate right now..she sleep with my 5 years old daughter.. we dont talk,only about kids ... nothing else.. Bruce i have to be real with u man ... Right now i feel like i want to throw a flag.. but i have 3 kids.. thats what make me think.. btw she took her ring off a month ago.. .. I LOST .. PLEASE GIVE ME SOME ADVICE ...
Useful. Thanks. ;)
depending on the fight I'm a turtle or a hailstorm :o
Omg this is helping me
Is there any way we can have a personal therepy session ?
I apologize if it's maybe too late for this. You can book personal sessions with Bruce here: www.loveatfirstfight.com/relationship-coaching/
Wish my ex should've watch this:( I got in the power struggle
Bruce I loved him and he loved me too .. Now he says that all his feelings have fade away.. And he said to be good friends again.. So how can I get him back?
By making sure to check out Bruce's free videos in www.loveatfirstfight.com
How do I find this PDF?
You can find the .pdf file by joining Bruce's mailing list (for free) at www.LoveAtFirstfight.com.
Hi, I joined the mailing list and received the mails from day 1 to day 3 but there is no PDF in sight. Where do I find it?
@@sebb447 Immediately after you signed up you were sent an email that contains a link to the videos. On that page, select "Video 2" from the navigation bar. Beneath video 2 is the PDF you are looking for.
Bruce I can't access the pdf...can you assist?
where are you located an how can me an my partner make an appointment with u
Im a turtle ... lol
Juicy....
the pdf isn’t there. it just shows a video?
Hi Sam, you will find it signing up for free at www.loveatfirstfight.com
Occasional conscious fighting to be fair. sometimes you find you both saying the same thing. in a round about way like you finally understand each other after all that huff and puff ..or you got a point there what shall we do about...sometimes we dont listen😂😂😂😂😂
right now im being the hailstorm and my boyfriend is the turtle... its awful
How do you join Bruce's mailing list?
Got to www.loveatfirstfight.com/ and sign in!
This is so true I'm such a turtle and she's totally a hellstorm
MAJORITY of women are Hailstorms and MAJORITY of men are turtle. I am a turtle!
Bruce, what do you do if you are both turtles, that's what's bugging us right now.
Right, that's my question.... what if we both become turtles??? I rarely chase him as a hailstorm. I shut down, he withdraws.
omg... lol so true
Good try...we are both hailstorms against each other. Violent fights. Yup.
Same
i cannot find the pdf :(
You can find the .pdf file by joining Bruce's mailing list (for free) at www.LoveAtFirstfight.com.
i did, but i still couldn't find it
Immediately after you signed up you were sent an email that contains a link to the videos. On that page, select "Video 2" from the navigation bar. Beneath video 2 is the PDF you are looking for.
Needs more snake oil.
Great advice. Thank you!