Integration: Becoming Something New
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- Опубліковано 26 жов 2019
- More information about Integration vs Fusion
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So I'm really sorry if this is a stupid question, but does this mean that integration doesn't always create a "new" alter? When DissociaDID integrated, Nin made it clear that she wasn't Chloe or Nina anymore, she was Nin. Is that only one type of integration? Because if I'm understanding this right, Kit remained Kit and was just somewhat effected by the integration, but didn't become a new person, is that right? Sorry I really don't know a lot about integration and I'm trying my best to learn.
If you follow the Piñata System, when Evan integrated with Risk, he became New Evan. There were changes and new memories, but he still mostly identified as Evan, only a changed one. He has Risk's memories and occasionally talks for him, but it seemed like Evan was the more "prominent" one in the end result. On the other hand, when Ace and Leslie integrated into Lacy, it really was a creation of a distinctly new alter, who was somewhat an equal "mix" of the two. I'd say integration is incredibly individual and everybody experiences it differently. It might also comes into play _how_ it happened, whether it was willingly or somebody didn't want to integrate, who integrated with whom, with what intention/for what reason, etc. There are just many variables. After all, each brain is different, so it makes sense that the experience varies so much... :)
(Just an obligatory note that I'm not multiple, this is my understanding, but I cannot speak from experience)
EFoxKitsune, you explained it incredibly well. Just like many other things with DID, integration/fusion is going to be a different experience for different systems.
Kit is a very very different person than she was pre-integration. She still identifies as Kit but the differences are massive. Similarly, Karen is practically unrecognizable compared to who she was pre-integration. You could say that they are “new” alters in a way, but they don’t identify that way.
I’m not sure why we haven’t experienced an integration like DissociaDID or Piñata where the resulting alter has a new name and identity. I just know that DID forms and develops based on what an individual needs most. Consistency has largely been a theme in our system. Jonathan decided to stay looking like a islander for consistency’s sake even though our inner world is no longer an island. This is just what it’s like for us. -Wyn
@@TheEntropySystem Thank you ❤ You guys are great, thanks for doing what you do.
Lots of love
EFoxKitsune - if you saw dissociaDIDs Instagram right after chloe and Nina integrated Nin was still using chloe - and she even said that she will still identify as chloe - but that as the days went on she just felt to different to keep being ‘chloe’ - and she tried out several names until we came upon Nin and that Nin just felt right...
So she wasn’t really ‘born’ with a new name - she chose it to reflect the differences she feels....
But I don’t see why every system shouldn’t be completely different - every integration I’ve heard about so far has been very distinctive even within the same system....
As in everything - there is no right or wrong way!
@@sabinahertzum9728 Yea, exactly, I know about Nin. It must be really confusing to become an inegrated alter - multiple sets of completely different memories and personal history and all, figuring out who they really are and what name/identity they identify with... Like you said, the experience can be very very different, and there's certainly no right and wrong - this is just one of the infinite number of possible ways in which it can be experienced. :)
“Words are dumb, language is dumb, why is everything confusing” - Kit 2019
Best quote ever 😂
"Words are dumb."
- Kit, 2019
lol I completely forgot that Kit and Mistletoe integrated a while back so when I read the title I was like WhAt WhO InTeGrAtEd???
SAME!
integration can also happen accidentally, without either alter meaning to fuse, it just... happens
how terrifying that must be, to suddenly stop existing in and if yourself and suddenly start existing with the entirety of another, whos now also you?
Can confirm...as far as an unexpected one kind of happening. Thinking back, yeah. All the signs were there. But it was a lot of ???????
Can you just imagine what it must be like if you are unaware of being multiple in the first place .. sheesh
@@andagain9826 I wonder if a person would be aware of an integration/fusion if they aren't aware that the alters exist. If they dont know A and B exist would they feel the fusing of them into C or AB or whatever or if it only happens when the host is aware of them
Does that make sense?
I think if someone wasn’t aware of being multiple they would not be aware of any integrations... just as before I was aware of being multiple I was not aware of new alters forming- most of my alters came into being at different times in my life, and they changed as well, without me knowing until I became aware of the system.
@@khecidsdragons7777 That makes sense. I'm glad you understood what I was saying the thought-word connection get a little jumbled sometimes lol
I've decided it is not an official info video without some kitty tails running around! -Gecko System
We try so hard to keep her out of the frame but it’s a futile battle 😂 -Wyn
@@TheEntropySystem it's no problem, she adds just a bit of happiness no matter what is going on. -Pan
@@TheEntropySystem please don't, unless it's bothering you. I love seeing her! my honest thoughts were "oh, there she is! Leia, you're late"
Please more kitties!!
Kitties 😻😻
"Parts are never going to disappear or go away; they will always be there, and part of you. Individual parts will always remain separately individual, but the goal of re-integration is to become aware of each other and working so seamlessly and cooperatively together, with shared information and regarding switches, that you can live and function in the outside world with a minimum of distress, without others even knowing about your multiplicity unless you choose to disclose it."
-Quote from the book "got parts?" by ATW.
Goalz.
This is such a great quote. I’m screen shotting this. -Wyn
That’s exactly what our therapist told us, and it’s been so encouraging 😊
I’m surprised that it is possible to integrate without permission from the other person, that’s very interesting! Definitely understand why Michelle would be upset about it!
Integration happens when those barriers are so broken down two alters blend together
When ya can't sleep and enjoy learning something new, this is perfect thank you for this interesting topic explanation!
When I walked into therapy 2.5 years ago begging to be one person I didn't know I'd end up loving and accepting all of me
DissociaDID recently had an integration in their system and their perspective/explanation of it was very different to yours. I’d love to see you guys do a collab discussing your understanding of integration and experiences with it if that’s something both systems would be open to!
Yea! And same for the Piñata System. It's wild how different the DID experience can be for everyone.
I just think it is strang how so many people with DID are suddenly integrating... are they feeling brave to talk about it as others have? Or are some systems chasingg the clout it is receiving?
@@hkislam7297 The last time the Entropy System had an integration was quite a while ago if I remember correctly, and I'm pretty sure the integrations of DissociaDID and Piñata are very much connected... they're partner systems after all, so it makes a ton of sense for an integration of one partner to have an effect on the other system as well... it's pretty much like losing a loved one... It's a huge change, and that change obviously affects their loved ones very much, too. It makes sense that one integration could help trigger another, in the other system...
I lost my girlfriend yesterday to her fusing together with our host. You explained exactly how I felt, and to hear someone on the outside say it out loud. I'm personally experiencing intense grief, because she didn't tell me. It was sudden, but she did get to say her last words to us, like she was in a hurry
well anyways I'm rambling but, thank you for making this video, it might be a small community but I'm glad we can all relate and help one another in this terribly distressing world
We in the Hellrangers System have had multiple integration/fusions, but there are some who feel like they'll never fuse because they are so heavily invested in our lives.
Usually the fusions seem to be people who serve to hold a specific memory or are made to serve a specific task(s) and then choose to fuse in with one of the more prominent alters when they are finished. ALSO we've noticed that a lot of the original 'sleeping' alters tend to break off others to serve a task that might be overwhelming and will integrate back after the task is considered 'complete'. There were a few that felt like a legitimate death, similar to the Mistletoe situation. One recently left things behind for everyone, but didn't say that he was leaving, it effected us greatly.
On the other hand, me (the host) was originally just supposed to be a placeholder for another alter until they could get things sorted out. Then they broke and fused with several others and a large portion of that alter fused with me, so now I'm the host, when I was originally intended to serve a task and integrate, now I am a part of the family and hold a lot of the memories of the ones who have fused with me.
It's all very complicated.
Yes, it can feel all very complicated.
I love the kitty tails in every video. Its so cute and funny. She just knows you are filming and HAS to get in the shot. Cats man 😂😂🤷🏼♀️🤷🏼♀️
Thanks for explaining integration and fusion. I didn't know they were different things, but now that you have explained it I get the difference and understand why there are different names for these two different things. Great video and I love Kit's eye look for this.
Thank you for this, we have so much anxiety surrounding integration. Sav and I are talking about it, it would help us alot, but I don't want to dissapear and she's afraid of becoming different. The more information we get, the better we feel about it. - Samantha
Whatever you choose to do, I'm wishing you all the best. Take care!
Sending much love ❤
Thank you for discussing the difference between the terms "integration" and "fusion"! It's difficult for me to decide what terms to use when blogging about my experiences with DID and the fusions we've had; it gets tiring to keep writing a disclaimer about terminology! And, as always, thank you for quality content!
Oh wow, this is really helpful. So my system already achieved integration on our own! Very cool! We have no desire to fuse. We're happy how we are. 😁
Poor Mi! She is my favorite little as she is so brave, cute and playful, I remember she was so happy playing in a puddle. I hope she will be okay soon
This isn't even my final form!
In all honesty. Your journey is amazing to watch, and how you all work together, both amongst yourselves and with your loved ones is really amazing. Thank you all for sharing your journey with us out here.
Very insightful! Thank you! And the framed letter from Josh is a super sweet thing! ❤️
Such an informative video, Kit is so calming, could listen to them talk forever.
Hope everyone is well and that you're not surprised by an integration/fusion again, I can only imagine what an extra struggle that must be.
So much love to you all ❤
thanks for educating people on topics related to plurality! we are always excited to watch your videos :) sincerely, superorganism
I am very happy that more professionals are considering integration differently. too many still propogate the version you'd said you thought of originally and beat it into systems heads as what needs to happen
Thank you! I really appreciated hearing your system's experience with integration!
I’m so glad your still posting videos!!! I really enjoy them!! And your insta is my fav!!❤️❤️
i just wanna say that your outro always makes me feel loved thank you :)
Oh gosh! Where you've talked about moving towards is a place we've found we're stumbling around in. It's a blendy blurry blobby co-everything fusing seperating softening forgetting-and-remembering disorienting sensible ever-changing pool of colours... Each of us is still ourselves, except we aren't. It's slow-moving and it's lightening fast...and if ever you want to chat please don't hesitate as we (while complaining that we've never any alone time to do whatever one does when all alone) haven't anyone to talk of these things with whose minds work in segmented ways and could empathize (but oh are we grateful for those who attempt to sympathize).
Anyway, it's wild and it's scary and it's more beautiful than any of us could have dreamed of...
Thank you so much for explaining the difference between integration and fusion, that's new terminology for me and very helpful.
We needed this
this makes somuch sense thank you. we've been going thru the memory sharing, like ive been the new host for 2 years and i have access to tons of info now and it doesnt like end my hapiness its just alot
This clears up a lot. Thank you.
Other DID systems use integration also in the same way you did... For example Dissociadid's Chloe just "integrated" with another alter..
It's interesting that personally my system is more or less fully integrated though there's still a lot of struggles with communication. My problem is that when I get emotionally distressed walls go back up and we get confused and disoriented.
How do u communicate or is there no more communication
Entropys experience with integration sounds very different from other systems, like Piñata and dissociadid, where there is big personality change and name changes etc. Any theories as to why?
DID experience is different for everyone.
When og Nan and Kit integrated Nan barely changed and still goes by the same name and pronouns, so not completely different.
Colette Sheaff Entropy’s experiences match ours a lot more in terms of past integrations. Like raindrops on a window pane running into each other to make one - neither parts are gone or new, they’re just more of the whole self. Some systems may feel like they want to rename their new integrated self, but this hasn’t been a theme in our system either
Loving your makeup Kit!
So interesting! Thanks for posting this
The Second Story is going to help out our system a lot we had a teen fuse with a kid in a similar way
Love your hair and makeup sm!! ✨💖💓🎀
I love your videos.
I'm coming back and rewatching some of your videos that I watched a while ago. Especially this one because we recently believed we had an integration/fusion, but it turned out to be really intense blending. I'm coming back to videos about integration/fusion because I realized that I'm incredibly scared of it. I know if I do integrate it'll be okay, but I don't want to disappear and that's scary for me. Thank you for talking about this.
I'm aprey yosure still not over Josh, that sucks. We had a bunch of alters all disappear at once... I still dont know where they are, dormant or integrated. I miss them all a lot, especially Whooves, who was the first alter I recognized, and such a wonderful protector. I know that one of the ones who dissapeared is back, I believe one of them somehow split into 2 different alters, if that's even possible, and one of them changed and matured a lot, and the other... havent seen anything from her in years. I miss them all, and wish I just understood why they all went through so many changes so quickly
I'm sorry for what you're going through. I know it can be really, really difficult to lose a friend or a part of your support group and it must be an incredibly difficult transition for anyone to be left to function in daily life without the others to back you up. I don't have any advice or words of wisdom, just support and well wishes.
I know alters breaking off is definitely a thing, bc that's how they form initially. It's kinda like how with integration or fusion, any two alters can come together. In the Pinata System, Seth had split off from Ace following a traumatic event, and they've had other alters who had split off during stressful periods (like moving house).
@@mmtruooao8377 Yeah... it was one of the most difficult times I've ever had when they first left. Things have evened out a lot more now, but I still wonder what happened
And yeah, breaking off is definatly a thing. Most of us have split off of the same one that I did, but I'm starting to think not all of them. I feel like Jane came from me, for example. It's a really complex kinda thing, I guess. Thank you for your well wishes!
I can imagine integration is tough! We haven't integrated at all yet but watching this made us feel a lot less nervous, thank you.
-25
I have achieved two integrations so far. One came about six years ago and the other last september. It is now Oct 2020. It is definitely unusual.
With my therapist I have used very simple terms to describe the difference. IN and OUT. Non integration they are on the outside. Integration they are Inside. I remember after the first integration which was my child part he would go back out again. Then I would urge him back in. This happened for a brief time and then stayed in and that has been so for all the years. I would often check that everything he was still existed and I would find that it was so. I rarely need to do that any more. Though when I am very sad I will do so to make sure I have remained whole in this manner.
One challenge has been that my child part also represented a part of me the I could love that appeared external to myself. As such I had someone to love other than myself, in spite of the fact he is a part of me. This has taken a lot of getting used to and I have missed that part of being with myself. It has made me feel rather needy at times because I seem to seek that on the outside still and there is no one to provide such a role. Basically there is no one to give my love to that is outside of myself, if that makes sense.
In my case there has been another change. I think it was you that had "the island" where your alters met. My place of contact is known as "the village" that has come into the integration concept as well. I cannot explain it easily in words. I draw it for my therapist to show her how I imagine it.
The semantic of words is often inadequate to truly bring meaning to these experiences. A certain degree of openness and latitude is required in these matters. Words have an ego to them and these concepts are very abstracted notions that often defy words in and of themselves. During my journey on this there have been long times that have passed, years, before I could find words adequate enough to describe these experiences to my therapist.
I have one remaining alter to integrate now. I feel it will occur since the other two have happened as well. There is no timeline on this though I practice certain things that led me to the first two integrations.
In both cases of integration the moment was filled with intense awe, surprize, joy, elation. Both were sudden as well. I would like to have more moments of that kind of awe again as myself. One did come with a fore knowledge as if something might occur. It was a few days later.
I do not have the experience of them deciding to integrate. It has been a team effort all along when I began this 20 years ago. It feels unlikely I would have been able to integrate without the therapist I currently have. I refer to her in a certain way that makes sense within my system.
The hardest part of not having a protector now is that I have to take up that role. That's confusing and very challenging of late.
---Notes on your experiences ----
The Josh and Karen description sounds to me like a blending.
I also experience changes as you have described though not the exact types you have. All systems are personally unique and special in their own way. :)
Thank you so much for this Kit! Wonderful job and so grateful to you for explaining all of this! Quick question: Could you all at some point create a "You are loved, your are valueable, you are valid" pin to be hooked on a shirt of backpack? We would love that!
I'm so impressed with you guys! I've been subscribed since the early days and I gotta admit I haven't been watching you videos in while and I literally spent the last 4 hours watching your newer videos and it makes me so happy and warm to see how much you've grown and how confident all of you seem. I'm so, so happy for you!
Oh, I also have a question and I really hope it doesn't sound rude to any of you. But in your earlier videos some of the alters seemed a lot more 'characterish'. Like a lot more exaggerated speech patterns and body language, almost a little cartoonish and I was wondering if that was just because you were just starting out with youtube and not quite comfortable in front of the camera yet or if all of you really changed that much through therapy, like alters developing?
The “character” behavior that you saw was the result of a lot of self doubt and nervousness. A lot of the alters hadn’t explored who they were outside of “Wyn Backup”. They were overcompensating as they struggled to figure out who they were and make themselves known to the rest of the system. Not to mention, the nerves of being a DID UA-camr in a time where that was almost unheard of.
The more we grew comfortable in our own skin, the more we were able to relax and act naturally. -Wyn
Please do a video about integration/fusion and vocabulary with dissociaDID .
I hope that could clear up dome questions.
Also the pinned comment was usefull - share it in a community post so it reaches more people.
10-15 years ago integration only meant (both colloquially and in therapy) what some people now call fusion. I think what many now call integration should be called something else, it's just too confusing to change the meaning of a word for for those of us long timers. "Integration" terrifies us, so we definitely won't be using that word to describe our therapeutic goals in any capacity.
I am not DID but I can imagine that changing of terminology at this point is very strange. The removing of the mental amnesiac barracades should have a new term like revealing or unveiling. Integration does not seem like the right term as the word generally means the bringing together or merging of two things.
watching this made me realize we may be, by the clinical definition, fully integrated. we have little to no memory gap, we don’t usually black out. it may be because i’ve been aware of my system since they formed (the littles and the parents forming around the time i was five, most others coming about during middle school) and because of the “parents” (the only two adults) of the system sort of... pushing for unity. we all work together like a community working towards a collective goal, which honestly is relief, i’d been getting worried that there might be something wrong with our system.
When you (Kit) and Mistletoe integrated , was it through a physical touch like with Todd and Michelle?
I don’t believe so because she said in the video that Mistletoe disappeared far back into the headspace before she did it and no-one realised when she has integrated for some time
@@Lily-tw2vw ah! You're right! Thanks, I forgot she said that lol
Kit (at least "new kit") reminds me of Molly Burke. I'm not sure if it's her style or the way she talks. But either way, I love it!
Oh, yeah-we see it, too!
That was an awesome video, Kit :D I kind of wonder if any other systems have experienced something weird that has happened to our system a couple of times though it does happen very rarely. It's when a few alters are working together very intensively for a long while then instead of this making them fuse or integrate with one another it just makes a whole new fragment or an alter who is similar to what everyone's included input was like combined all together but also has their own unique personality yet at the same time all the alters initially involved in working together for a while are still very much there, seemingly intact and have not fused nor integrated in order to create this new alter or fragment, it's as if the experience itself made some tiny fragments related to the initial alters come together and fuse or something? I've seen someone mention a similar thing (I think?) happening to their system in one of the comments on some DID/OSDD related video but I never really got around to asking about this myself up until now
-Jack
Galaxy Peacock That reminds me of the “gem fusions” in the cartoon Steven Universe. I think the Piñata System or DissociaDID (UA-cam Systems) made a video mentioning that cartoon as an example of integration, but your example sounds even more like that. Look Steven Universe gem fusion on UA-cam and check it out. Remember, there’s no right way to do DID-it’s adaptive. Your experience may be different, but it’s how your system is adapting and there’s always a reason for that which is somehow working for you.
As an OSDD-1b system, we don't have to worry much about integration. Though we would like to get better at communicating and stuff.
I've only heard Integration, and fusion is only mentioned when people explain how a new integrated alter forming is kind of like gem fusion in Steven Universe - e.g. how DissociaDID's Nin was formed from Nina and Chloe.
Is the ultimate goal to fuse into one personality, or is it to have a cooperative system where all the alters work together and there's no longer gaps in memory due to amnesia because of good communication etc? Sorry, I'm tired so I'm not 100% sure if I'm understanding the difference between integration and fusion. Is it fusion if you don't automatically process all the trauma memories that involves?
If I were in a system, I would like an integration to happen after a long chat over an afternoon, like many singletons have with their loved ones involved in big decisions.
I sometimes worry when I hear lots of changes happening in a DID system. I always hope that when there's integrations, new alters or major changes to host/headspace, that it's due to therapy and processing existing trauma, not experiencing new trauma. E.g. the Escape System (a.k.a. itsokcosplay on Tik Tok) shared their carrd webpage detailing the 36 alters they know of, and the spaces in their headspace. There's a handful of alters there that were created this month, or have come out of dormancy. I also know their original host (or the alter that identified with the body's birth name) disappeared years ago, and might even be dormant somewhere in the headspace. That would be so tough, losing major alters who take with them a huge chunk of memories and knowledge.
Our long term goal is to have everyone present as individuals but have the memory barriers between us broken down. Some of us may choose to fuse, like Mistletoe, Todd, and Josh did, but that is not something we’re going to push for. If an individual in our system makes that choice we will support them but I know most of us don’t have that desire.
All of our fusions have been the result of healing. I cant speak for other systems, but for us it’s been a positive thing. -Wyn
So in theory (heavy stress on theory) could a fully "integrated" system drop their DID diagnosis for an OSDD1b diagnosis? And could OSDD1b systems like us really be DID systems that fully "integrated" before awareness? Is having two different diagnoses then pointless? Very interesting to think about.
The diagnosis would remain the same because of how memory worked previously. In childhood, we still had memory barriers between us. OSDD1b systems did not. That part can’t change. -Wyn
Wait, so does this mean that OSDD-1b systems are integrated but not fused? Or are they incompletely integrated? I thought maybe they were less dissociated, so more integrated.
@@TheEntropySystem not to mention how frequently DID and OSDD are comorbid with CPTSD
@@ryk6207 We are an OSDD-1B one. What I think (wasn't proven) is that the trauma happened a little late than the average people with DID so my personality was almost normal but didn't get to fuse completely, hence "kinda being like DID"
One thing I'm curious about:
When there is an integration or fusion, is there a mourning period afterwards? I am guessing that such wouldn't happen with every event, but sometimes?
Yeah when we had our first integration we cried a lot
Dissociadid has a recent video on this (Nin's first video) and their partner system the Pinata System has a similar video from their alter Lacy that discusses this. There is grieving.
I can’t speak for all systems but all of our fusions have been followed by a long grieving period. -Wyn
@@TheEntropySystem, that's fair. Everyone is different. However, that is good to know in case someone needs comfort or if they need space.
P.S. I hope you know just how much you do for literally thousands of people. I can say, for myself, that your posts helped change my diagnosis and I'm finally getting truly productive treatment. So, thank you, you freaking rock!
oh definitely, a member of our system is still mourning another who fused a couple years ago.
Just came by to say Kit is adorable ❤
We experienced around 40 integrations in the space of 3 and a half weeks. Including the original (birth named) Host. We have also experienced de-integration. THAT was weird... and painful.
Can two alters unintentionally integrate even though one of them is still not aware of their trauma?
How do you communicate with outside alters introjects that no longer communicate with us but still is present in a way that prevents you from communicating but it keeps you from intigration bc they refuse to let go
I was wondering if this is normal I looked up what’s happening in my head and I couldn’t truly find anything so I thought I could ask the entropy system and commenters I have past trauma I’m not going to talk about that might contribute but I honestly don’t know I’ve been living in an alternate world of me since I was little it’s just me and other me only the other world is worse my situations are worse then my reality other me has different siblings and parents and children and a significant other they live in another state everything about them is different except that they’re me I’m finding myself spending more time in the other world then reality so Im trying to find answers because even though I like my other world it’s hurting my life In the real world thank you for reading if you know anything or have any advice it would really help
Have you looked at maladaptive daydreaming?
XxRynethxX I looked it up and it is almost exactly what im experiencing thank you so much
can one of you give us an update on your inner world? is it still the city? have any of you found that interacting with the "NPCs" has had a positive effect on you socially? (and to other viewers, if they already made a vid on this can someone please link it?) thank you so much for all your videos
Is it possible for someone with OSDD-1B to integrate/fuse?
I'm sorry, but I'm still a little confused. I understand that fusion is the result of two alters merging together as one. I am a fusion of our old host Carrie and Kimberly (Kinder: new host). I'm confused about the real meaning of integration.
So if someone integrates , does that mean that everything one alter experiences automatically "uploads" to the other alter's memories? Because none of us have that connection as far as I know. But some of us do have unique memory sharing abilities.
For example, we have a few alters who are able to share full memories, but it is usually an effort. We "push" our memories to another alter to share them. I am able to do this with a few of the alters.
Also, some of our memories get confused with one another. I will remember things that "I" did, but it's kind of vague and I can't remember details. But in reality, it may have been Eva. And these are even times that I wasn't co-concious.
Then there are those of us who are a complete barrier, such as Lex. I personally don't remember anything he experiences unless I'm co-concious, and that's because they are MY memories as a bystander. He can't share those memories with me and I can't share any with him.
So, does that mean that I have integrated with Eva, but not with Lex, even though there are still a lot of things that Eva does that I don't remember if I'm not co-concious? THAT is the part the confuses me. If I'm integrated with Eva, shouldn't I remember most of what she does even when I'm not close to the front?
- Kinder (host)
Perhaps this is something you won't know until it happens, but once a system achieves full integration and all the walls are down and memories are fully shared and experienced, does that mean people in the system will still front as distinct individuals? Or will the host seem like they have one personality from the outside perspective and each alter will be an aspect of that same personality? Does this question make sense??? I think that's the real sticking point in understanding integration v. fusion for me.
Is it OK to not want to integrate and not want the barriers there but to build the amnesia barriers up? It would really help us feel like are own persons because it's like are own individual memories yeah know. Is it OK....
The book 'Minds in Many Pieces' (link below) states that there are 3 types of integration - positive, negative, and incomplete. it doesnt describe it in the detail i'd have liked it to, but i would recommend reading it for anyone confused.
www.dissociation.com/MIMP%20specimen%20rev%202-13.pdf
I'm not sure you're right about the official definitions of "integration" and "fusion." M&M says the same as y'all, but neither of you cite sources. The literature I know seems to use "integration" to mean two becoming one. Is usage even consistent among academics and clinicians on this, and if so, when did it become so?
Edit: I've started to look through sources I have on hand to confirm/disconfirm my impression regarding professional use of the terms "integration" and "fusion." David Yeung uses the terms interchangeably in Volume 3 of his multi-volume series, Engaging Multiple Personalities. For example, in Chapter 17, he writes that "Many people who work with DID consider the integration, or fusion, of alters into a single personality as the goal...". The other occasions on which he uses the term "integration" make it clear to me that he uses it as you use "fusion. "
It's like a fusion from Steven Universe.
❤️
My personality has changed drastically since a few days ago, also my depression is gone. This can't be something I'd experience as a singlet, and the other signs are very there. If I do have DID or OSDD then why won't they reach out to me? And how do I notice if they do?
Hey! How are you/you all doing now? We just saw your comment. We had this same experience in 2019, but came to terms with being a system only last year. Sometimes, your system can’t reach out to you directly. The advice we received was, “Every time you feel like someone else, write down what you remember, what your name is, and what gender you are.” We thought it was really kooky at the time, but doing that is how we found one another.
One thing that I’m curious about that is slightly off topic, but when you said that josh left a note that you framed, is this note a note that is framed somewhere in the head space, or is it a real physical not that you guys have at your home?
It’s a physical note in the outside world. It’s something our husband Andrew cherishes as much as we do. -Wyn
That is so cool. Thanks for answering!
I just keep jealously glancing at your danganronpa merch
Sam and Pip fused with each other to make Daniel. And Angel, and Kelli fused with me so I am now going by my nickname and have all of their memories. We don’t want to fuse anymore but maybe integration.
Hi kit!
I love when you do videos
Did anyone get mistletoes's memories?
hi! this is a relatively old video so i'm not sure if you are going to see this (maybe some of the viewers can help me out in that case? :) ) but i was wondering: when you say 'X alter wanted/decided to integrate' --> is this to be understood as a proper intent and decision? can all alters at all time just decide to integrate?
just saying it sounds wrong but i'm curious and not entirely sure how to phrase it better, soz and thanks in advance! :)
At least in our system, fusions must be a conscious decision by at least one part. The “receiving” part isn’t always aware of what’s about to happen but choosing to fuse is just that: a choice. We’ve never experienced it happening spontaneously or accidentally
@@TheEntropySystem thank you for the (super quick) answer!!! so what were to happen if all alters decided to fuse? just a theorem, i know it was said in the video that some of you don't want to and thats v understandable! like, if first full integration had happened, and all amnesia barriers were down, would a full fusion then be able to happen at will?
(and again, if ure busy, dont go out of ur way to answer this!!! no stress, only love ♡)
I’m not sure! I don’t think we’d be able to know the answer unless it happened to us
@@TheEntropySystem that's fair! thanks for ur time and take care!
fusion scares us so much. It isn't something we find necessary as we are an OSDD 1-b system and I (the host) is always co-con with whoever is fronting. I would be so scared if we ended up "fusing" (lol) naturally and have 0% control over it! We all wish to remain separate bc that is all that we have ever known. (Our first split happened we were 26 weeks old.) Any else like us who are terrified?
my head hurts
I see Danganronpa on the shelf! I’d love your opinion on Toko/Genocide Jack!
We definitely will! But we want to play Ultra Despair Girls first so that we get her whole story. -Wyn
Wait Todd integrated!?!?!
If kit now longer identifies with her former presentation in the inner world, how does she look like now?
She explained it at some point when she told people she had aged up but I don't really remember, i think they just didn't know at the time that that was an influence from mistletoe. If I'm wrong, it'd be great if someone would correct me or elaborate but this is my current understanding of the situation.
If you check out our Instagram or Twitter, Kit has been posting a bunch of self portraits for Inktober :) -Wyn
does kim kim still live with kit now that she’s an adult?
Yep :) -Wyn
Do you sometimes still feel like you're faking?
Is Michelle still around?
She is, but we don’t allow littles on camera. -Wyn
@@TheEntropySystem oh yeah I forgot that she was still a little.
WORDS ARE SO DUMB!!! >< haha
If intergration will break down the amnesic walls, wouldn't that mean that ever alter will then have knowledge of the trauma that caused the DID in the first place?
That's the goal of trauma processing, yes. -Wyn
@@TheEntropySystem woah. That sounds horribly tough. I'm in therapy and we haven't been able to touch on my childhood traumas yet, coz any time it's mentioned I space out and can't deal. I can't imagine how much harder this would be for the alters that have been shielded from these memories, to then learn about what happened
I understand that Mistletoe didn't get your consent to fuse with you and Todd didn't get Michele's consent, but did it sounds like maybe Josh did get Karen's consent. Is consent important in this context? It seems like it would be super important.
I thought I remembered that Karen had integrated (???.) At any rate, can you please update us on the people in your system now that a few have integrated?
If you watch our video “Who is the Entropy System” it has an explanation of all of us as we are now as well as face claims! -Wyn
Hey just saying be careful what you share about your child alter I don’t want anything to happen to you guys!
Don’t worry, we don’t share anything that could put us at risk :)
Ok thanks I just didn’t want anything to happen to you guys. Much love and and hope you guys are doing well!!! :)
Words ARE dumb >:(