On the Participation Trophy
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- Опубліковано 17 вер 2018
- In which John Green tells a story about a participation trophy, discussed Participation Trophy Culture, and thinks about what the point of competition is. COME SEE HANK AND I ON TOUR NEXT WEEK: hankgreen.com
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"at least he cares" lol the coach was savage
Princess Bubblegum did nothing wrong asksmxmkakaksmmsjsbdmwk. Your profile picture!!
And incredibly efficient at being savage. John Green; Most Efficient Burn Fuel 1984
I made the all-star softball team in 8th grade solely for good sportsmanship-not athleticism, but sportsmanship.
I died at that part 😹😹
Have you ever _had_ a school coach?
All Star in Our Hearts.
That. Is. The. Cutest.
I still don't know why they didn't just call me an all star! WHY NOT LIE? IT'S A FAKE TROPHY. -John
@@vlogbrothers Because parent also like to put sentimentality into their gestures. They are very sweet that way.
Hey now
you're an all-star, get your game on, go play
the fault in All Stars...
First. :) -John
vlogbrothers second?
Not fair. Third
vlogbrothers well played.
Wait is this your competitive side showing in the comments section?
I'm not first, but do I get a...
Nah, the joke's too easy.
Yesss
Side note: This always bothers me, as a member (barely) of the "participation trophy" generation. I, as a child, did not demand a participation trophy. I didn't create it. I didn't ask for it. And I, as a child, was fully aware of the score in our scoreless srimage matches. Why do we get blamed for it as though it was the idea of some nefarious 4 year old?
It seems like most generations don't wanna admit they have a big part in any failings of the next one. I hope this generation breaks that cycle...but I'm not holding my breath.
treymedley you nailed it. The same generation berating millennials for receiving participation trophies refuses to realize it was their peers who created the concept.
I'm willing to bet that a number of those cranky old folks got participation trophies themselves. They're just desperate to feel superior to other people.
Exactly, the only time as a child I cared about a "participation trophy" the ribbon, or lack of receiving one when everyone else did, wasn't the issue, the adults making such a point of not giving a little kid something they gave all the other kids was just rubbing salt in the wound of having been unfairly disqualified.
I suspect that people blame the generation for the symptom, but at the end of the day, a character flaw like a desire for false validation DOES fall on the person exhibiting the behavior, and only partially on those who encouraged the behavior. Otherwise, every person who has any sort of flaw could just blame other people for all their faults and never be encouraged to actually fix it (which, when you think about it, is the reason we have first place trophies in the first place: we want to encourage kids to excel, and not be satisfied with merely being tangential to success).
This channel is a brilliant reminder that every life is remarkable and filled with fascinating details and stories.
Ahhh thanks Lawrence :) -John
Lawrence Calablaster indeed, keeps me coming back!
Lawrence Calablaster Speaking of which, your last name is awesome.
how pretty the thought, and how untrue x
Lawrence Calablaster life really is.
John Green: Motivational Tool
Lawrence Calablaster Title of his autobiography
+Lawrence Calablaster Also, sometimes just a tool, like all of us.
That sounds way more insulting than it should.
@@glennhower9265 But that's why the comment is funny/great 😂
I feel like Hank would reply to that "And sometimes just a tool" (in a loving way of course) 😄
My mom bought a bunch of trophies for me and my siblings because we wanted to have trophies, but rather than going to a trophy store we went to a thrift store and each got to pick out our own. I was very young at the time and couldn't read well so I didn't particularly mind that mine had someone else's name engraved into it.
Love the idea of having a huge trophy collection comprised of other people's trophies. -John
Riley Hulick I remember finding a bunch of trophies at a take it or leave it. I took all of them. I was very proud of “my” trophies. Ironically, I was more proud of the blue trophy with a hockey player I got at the take it or leave it, which had someone else’s name on it, than the maroon trophy with a runner that I got for being the second fastest boy in my age group in some race. The reason? I liked blue more than maroon.
When people rant about participation trophies what they’re often missing is kids don’t really want a reward for doing nothing, they just want a shiny decoration to put on their shelves.
Gosh, John is such a good storyteller in all forms
But have you seen his puppet show? 3 stars, at best.
I feel like everyone veiws Hank and Johns relationship as a rivalry except nerdfighters, because we know how much they work hard together, and help each other reach their goals and become more successfull and happy. I wish the rest of the world could see that as clearly as we do.
I think that's very true. We are so lucky that our community has never pushed us as brothers toward a rivalry. People in this community are often *totally unwilling* to pick a "favorite brother," or at least to acknowledge that they have a favorite. That's definitely been a huge gift to us. -John
Obviously, there's only one right answer to the 'favourite brother' question. It always has been, and always will be, Dave.
Exactly. Plus, they literally built all of their youtube success together. You could maybe argue that parts of it (like Sci-Show) was more of an effort by one than the other, but they still would not have the platform they do if they hadn't started this channel together back in 2007.
@@vlogbrothers Its very hard to pick a favourite brother when you're both so amazing. We're very lucky to have you.
I would have just felt patronised by such a thing and I have felt the same way about participation awards in general. But participation trophies aren't for me. I am overly competitive and have been lucky enough to be able to compete in things that play to my strengths. Participation awards mostly just annoy me.
My eldest daughter is not me, she's a far better person in almost every way. She's not overly competitive and she's also fairly terrible at sports. Like John though, she does love them. The participation trophies are for people like her. Because every time she gets one she steps up her efforts. Now she's actually getting pretty good at her chosen pursuits, because she's received not only encouragement from her family, but validation for her effort from the outside as well.
People always complain about participation trophies, but the reason we give them out is that science says it's a really good idea. It's not celebrating failure, it's giving those who don't immediately succeed motivation to continue and improve instead of just giving up. And almost everybody doesn't succeed at their first try - even those that legitimately win something first go have only failed the least hard - they still need to work hard and improve if they want to be genuinely good at whatever it is. Why *NOT* offer this encouragement to everybody who puts in the effort? Those who some claim might be discouraged (like me) are generally actually spurred on to get the "real" trophies.
So even though I said participation awards annoy me, they are actually a really great tool, backed by hard science and they do good for humanity.
The thing is: participation trophies aren't demanded by the kids, they're demanded by the parents who think their child is infallible and they can do nothing wrong.
Also I think most people actually do want to EARN that trophy. Part of growing up is trying to figure out exactly what your interests and talents are. Some kids have a more difficult time with that than others. They'll try different things only to fail over and over again. And parents want to give them some kind of award to boost their confidence which is understandable. However you learn from failure. You realize that's not something you're going to be good at and you move onto something else. If you're given an award for failing then the kid thinks they're actually accomplished something good. You're reinforcing the idea that they have done something good and stunt their development. They won't learn from that failure if they're not allowed to see that it is a failure.
I'm not saying to go in the complete opposite direction and make them feel like losers when they likely already feel bad. That's even worse.
Just use it as a teaching moment. You're not good at this thing and that's OK. You might be good at something else. And encourage them to try other activities. That's the best thing you could possibly do for them and this boosts their confidence without giving them awards for basically doing nothing.
THIS +
To me it seems to be asked for by parents who just want their kids to feel like an all star.
This is how it all started. The history of the participation trophy:
ua-cam.com/video/u-TbQL2lHvQ/v-deo.html
I've seen that! I worked in a Pediatric Dental office where we'd reward kids who were cavity free with small prizes in order to encourage better Hygiene, less sugar/junk food consumption, etc. If a sibling came and wasn't cavity free or just didn't get seen by the dentist on that day, I'd have moms pull me aside and say things like, "I know Hunter didn't get an exam today, but he'd be really crush if he didn't get a toy. Can you make an exception?"
I remember one time when I was in middle school we had my entire school of 300 people do a 1.84 mile race.
I got 5th place, and everybody who got in the top 10 got a ribbon.
I was so proud of my accomplishment because even though I had never been athletic in my entire life; I put everything I had into that race and I never stopped running as fast as I could, and I ended up collapsing at the end.
I was angry when I woke up and found out that everybody got a purple participation ribbon for completing the race at the very minimum.
But, I realized that everybody who completed the race also put in a lot of hard work, and they should get something for what they did.
I don't feel as if participation awards are to make people feel like they won; I believe that participation awards are there for the people who put in the hard work, and those want something to prove that they put in hard work and with it; the participation award is there for people to look at something and say "I did that.".
Wyatt Bakke and that’s why people come to expect a ribbon for running a marathon, or a half marathon, it’s still an accomplishment even if you don’t get in the top 10
Yes, very well said.
And that's why I think participation trophies is perfectly fine, as long as they make it very clear that the award is for the effort. It's not because you won, or because you're special, but because you tried and did your best. Like John mentioned his parents do as well, praise the effort, not the outcome.
And what about the people that participated but didn't put in full effort? I coach youth soccer, and let me tell you, not everyone on the team understands what "effort" means, and if you are awarding "effort", everyone would not get a participation trophy.
I remember one year I did terribly; I must've pinned less than 15 people that year
Coach never put me down. He only gave me suggestions and the environment for improvement
If I didn't improve, that was all on me
I've never played a team sports, but I've seen a solution to some people putting in no effort
When I was in high school I use to watch the local hockey team all the time
There were tournaments, and at the end of the local tournaments the individuals on each team who played center, defense, and the people on each team who scored the most goals on each team, and the chosen MVP, would get a trophy for what they did. It was a small trophy, but it was something to show that they put in hard work.
I feel like that's a good solution for team sports.
STORY TIME:
The Scene: Middle School End of the Year Awards Ceremony, I'm in 8th grade.
All the students involved with the state Science Olympiad get called up so the teachers can recognize those who went and won real awards for their peers. I didn't win jack diddly squat, but I was on the team, so I'm called up for that general recognition. I had built a balsa wood plane. It was a brick that kinda glided. I had no idea what I was doing. That's ok. All's good.
My science teacher goes down the list, recognizing teammates who did well at competition. Then starts to tell the story about how all of us who were involved last year didn't get to compete as we took the 4 hour bus ride down to the big city just to find out the campus had been shut down to a meningitis outbreak (this was pre-cell phones or speedy internet updates). So getting the chance to compete this a big deal for the team.
She then goes on to tell the story about one student who was set on competing in the same area again this year rebuilt their entry just to have it caught in the wind on a test flight, thrown into a cornfeild and destroyed shortly before competition. They rebuilt it. When we finally get to competition and all the planes are stored at the designated spot, they came back to find out it was stolen and no where to be found.
About halfway through this story I realize she's talking about me and I'm like....confused, sitting, probably bright red in front of the entire school assembly.
She then pulls out the tallest trophy given out that entire day, with a golden plane atop it.
Science Olympiad, Balsa Plane Competition, for Endless Determination.
The assembly actually cheered.
I received a lot of non-participation trophies as a school-aged kid, it was a small school and I was involved with half of everything, but the one that was the most valuable to me even though it was for failing repeatedly. Participation trophies can be done right.
People can hate, but that's a very powerful and important memory, and nobody can take that away from you.
5th grade robotics. Our team won the "gracious professionalism" trophy. I knew it was just a participation trophy and I was pissed. Not that our team hadn't won, but because these people thought that we needed validation even though we lost. They could barely get me to go up and accept it with the team. Participation trophies had always made me feel like I was being looked down upon, or that my efforts weren't being taken seriously. I always felt disrespected. A really bad childhood memory that at least makes for a good story now.
this made me cry! it was a very touching story, but also i really need some sleep....
I stopped not doing my homework for this 🖖🖖
hahaha GO BACK TO YOUR HOMEWORK! ;) -John
Hahahahaha your videos are more educational than school 👍👍 your crash courses save my life
Gregory of Nazianzus awaits me...
Same
@Circumspect Caninetrovert Math was misery for me for all of my middle and high school life (except Geometry because my teacher was incredible). 10 years after high school ended, I started college and was terrified and miserable at the idea of taking College Algebra. But I ended up loving it and got a minor in Math. I'm preparing to pursue a Masters in Statistics.
Point of this is that there are a lot of factors to why something is terrible at one phase of your life that might not be the case at another phase. Get through this and stay open to having your mind changed. And if you need some help, message me. Nerdfighters stick together.
_at least he cares_
+
I'm not first, but I do feel like a winner for having watched this video.
You deserved this comment trophie!🏆😊
🏆🏆🏆
I know you worked really hard on it.
I, too, watched this video but I do not feel like a winner. Please teach me your ways?
Man I just love the Green brothers :,) they deserve all of the trophies for everything
And I love how much they recognize it's about contributing because they can and not for only praise/reward.
I love this, and I think praising effort is far more meaningful than praising achievement- maybe we should all be trying less to be the best player on the team and more to be the person who cares the most
Better to be a motivational tool than a benchwarmer.
"Knowing that we can be loved exactly as we are gives us all the best opportunity for growing into the healthiest of people" -Fred Rogers
Wow! As usual I really love your thought processes behind this topic and your thoughts on it! I've over-simplified so many things just in my own human faulty thinking and I can always count on a vlogbrothers video to make me view any subject more complexly- as it should be viewed. (Ps. See you in Canton OHIO! 😊)
Looking forward to Canton!! -John
vlogbrothers Yay! Thanks for the reply! I'm planning to give Hank a letter and one to give to you too (later) at the meet and greet ☺️
As part of the "participation trophy generation" I NEVER got a trophy. Even when I was part of a winning team the most I got was a medal. (of course it gets pricey to give all 150 kids in marching band a trophy) And even when we did get an item, usually a patch, for "just participating" like going to local, national, or world championships, I thought of them more as a reminder of how hard I worked just to be there, or even just what it should be, a keepsake for a great memory.
To be honest, medals are way cooler than trophies anyway. Especially since even the cheaper medals they'd give out are actually made of some kind of metal and have weight to them - the trophies _were_ cheap, because they were just plastic.
I've participated in life -where's my trophy?
Consciousness is your trophy and it's AMAZING. :) -John
My read on this video is that a "trophy" is something that someone arbitrarily decides to create to honor something, whether that's an effort or an achievement. You can make yourself a trophy, or throw yourself a party, or reward yourself in some way for your participation. Or maybe your friends, family, someone already is celebrating the effort that you put into being alive. Trophies are inherently boring, but meaningful because they are a concrete indication of pride and appreciation of what we've done. Ideally, we all get that from someone, but maybe even more ideally we can feel it in ourselves. /pretension
Consciousness is aight but I'd prefer vodka
Ah. Vodka's good. I prefer Scotch though.
You get it at the end of your life. It's called a head stone and it will be displayed at your tomb until someone decides otherwise.
This really made me smile. You're an all star in my heart too John!
I don't think I quite know how to explain the warm feeling this video has given me, but I know that I love it.
I am loving these recent vlogbrothers videos, they're all so wholesome and uplifting
I laughed so hard in the beginning and was nodding at the end, as always amazed by how you can end every topid with some deep wisdom piece
*John, congratulations on being you*
Yes a vlogbrothers video on my birthday! That's a pretty great gift!
+Anna Joy Myrick Happy Birthday! Also: First! Possibly.
Happy Birthday! :) -John
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday! =D
It’s my birthday too!! Happy birthday!
The tutoring program I served with the last two years encouraged the growth mindset, which is pretty much what you described, and I used it a lot, especially with one student who wouldn't stop getting down on herself for failing exams. I told her that the more important thing was that she keep putting in the work, keep trying to learn, and use myself and her teacher when she needed to. She didn't pass either semester of the course, but when I saw her at the end of finals week last spring, she said she was ready to retake it because she knew how to grow.
I’m glad I watched this video before I commented. John is very eloquent. I deeply appreciate the point of view he is sharing in this video.
Of course he's eloquent: he's a best-selling wordsmith ;)
I think this is one of my favorite styles of a vlogbrother video, a relatable story and then an even more relatable lesson. It was cute and genuine and a little reminder of the good things in life.
I was never the best in my dance classes. but did I try? YES. so did they give me a trophy? YES. did that encourage me to keep going? YES.
The studies show it doesn’t help with performance and just turns you into an entitled brat
I always hated participation prizes, it felt like I was receiving reminder that I did just average
It's not relevant to the video, but I wanted to say that I'm currently reading Turtles all the way Down and your portrayal of Aza's OCD is so incredibly similar to my own OCD. I've never read or seen a story that depicts the internal part of OCD and how it feels when it's primarily obsessive, rather than the normal depiction of primarily compulsive.
I just wanted to say how meaningful it is to see that and how much I relate to the character because of that, as well as her having similar obsessions to my own.
DFTBA
Well put John. I think this raises a much deeper question than we even realize.
People bad mouth participation trophies because "in life if you want something you have to earn it" which is true, but being the star isn't the same as 'earning it'
Martin Luther King Jr was a great man, he has a holiday to honor him as well he should. But he didn't march on Salem alone. There were hundreds with him, most of whom we don't know their names. If they didn't participate with Martin he would just be a guy walking down the street.
And take any great person in history, from Presidents, to Kings, to Generals, to other Leaders.... not a single one would be able to do all the great things they accomplished without others having their back.
We need to teach children that being part of a team is important even if your not the leader/star, if a little crappy piece of plastic helps teach that lesson it's well worth it.
I can see some value in participation trophies because, as the saying goes, 90% of success in life can be attributed to just showing up.
Like, in order for you to maintain a friendship, you often have to make a concerted effort to plan days to hang out with that person. If you want a tomato to thrive, you have to water it every day.
Some days you may show up to said date and be kinda crabby; other days you may overwater the tomato.
But as long as you make a consistent, concerted effort, you'll still get pretty far in the majority of your pursuits.
This lesson is actually really useful to neurodiverse folks like myself who were so fearful of getting it wrong as children that they had to fight tooth and nail against the urge to just curl up into a fetal position and never learn how to tie their shoes.
The thing boomers miss when they're raging against Millennials and participation trophies is WE DIDN'T ASK FOR THEM. Who came up with the participation trophies? The parents! In the Boomer generation!
Yep. This is how the participation trophy was invented 🏆
ua-cam.com/video/u-TbQL2lHvQ/v-deo.html
Thank for ALWAYS uploading great and meaningful content!
This videos never disappoint. They always come at perfect timing too
John Green, John Green, joyful gent John Green! I tell ya, it is the delight of my day to watch your videos. Whether it's humbling introspection or learning about something I want to care about or finding joy in everyday life, I can turn to you.
John's expression in the thumbnail is me on a daily basis.
Whenever I think of participation trophies, I think of those who struggle with mental illness like me. Sometimes showing up is the hardest part of it and being there and participating consistently takes a lot of work. I don't think participation shouldn't be awarded, I just think it is different than other achievement awards. It's the first step in a possible line of many other achievements. Because if you don't at least show up, you can't go on to win anything down the road.
Thank you John for taking your time to reply on so many comments with positivity, jokes and anecdotes. Your participation really enforces the idea of a community and lets us know *you care*!
Lovely. These videos and your brotherly relationship are a moral anchor for me. Thank you. Please don't ever stop.
I won't make a Smash Mouth joke, I won't make a Smash Mouth joke...
Recently got an automatic cat feeder. It allows you to record 10 seconds of audio. First thought I had "the kittens need to know they're all-stars"... *records ten seconds of smash mouth to be replayed automatically 3 times a day*
those kittens are so going to learn to associate smash mouth with food and its going to be glorious
+@@caitlynbaker320 They will and it will.
Anybody else relate to John being a backup all star😂
John and Hank green always nail it with these blogs. They’ve now got me rethinking how I view competition.
I like that your videos of late have been really good parenting advice! If my spouse and I ever decide to try to have kids, I'm starting a playlist of some of these videos.
Your broad concept advice is much more reliably good than your specific question advice.
"At Least He CARES!" John's Memoir?
the quote from your coach is great x
Loving these videos that show you both supporting one another and building each other up.
I definitely appreciate this, especially since I was on the local soccer team at 11. Never scored a goal, and our biggest win was 1-0, but I got a little rainbow heart I could stitch onto my jersey meaning I had heart (i.e. "that boy ran a lot"). When we were obliterated in our local teams tournament we all got a trophy... not for our achievement, but because we worked hard in each game.
And now I'm an adult and wondering whatever happened to that trophy from over two decades ago. And you're making me want to display it, high and proud, and say "at least I tried... and had heart doing it". Thanks, John.
From an almost all star soccer player to somehow sponsoring a soccer team. Curious about that.
Simon Astor An almost all star t-ball player :)
Honestly it’s just ridiculous to think that students don’t know the difference between a participation trophy that you can look back at for memories and a trophy that actually symbolizes an achievement. I actually held on to my winning medals and trophies, but I just occasionally go look at the box of random soccer participation trophies...
Congratulations, Hank and John, for working your darnedest to create thoughtful content for years and for achieving this with a community that loves and appreciates you and each other for who they are. If that isn't worth a trophy, I don't know what is.
One time my parents paid the girl guides admission and the instructor got seriously ill just before the year started. We never had a single meeting. At the end of the year I was at my little sisters award ceremony and we were all confused when they called my name. I got a badge and an award, and the well meaning but ill informed figure head gave the same speech: "you have earned this with your year of hard work girls!"
I think that really jaded me. I hadnt even participated. I got an award and a badge for my parents paying the entry fee and not asking for a refund. While teaching kids the value of trying is great, its important not to just assume kids are trying and give them awards no matter what. It made me question for years if the person giving me praise even really noticed my effort, or just had "acknowledge participant" on their best practices checklist.
"life is not a zero sum game" - big thing to take away
One of these days, your videos won't make me cry. But not today, sir. Not today. :')
I love you guys. You warm my heart every time I see your faces grace my subscription feed (at least when subscriptions are functional).
This was the most heartwarming video I've seen in a while. My heart has been warmed! Thank you.
I bet Hank's book is going to be great, but he forgot to mention in his last video that it's available for pre-order.
Participation trophies are for disappointed parents not disappointed kids.
I didn't know that about the etymology of compete but it's sort of fantastic. Also fantastic is the brotherly love between Hank and John. Downright heart warming is what it is.
Aww John, that was so sweet! You made teary-eyed with that last sentence.
I'm hoping this doesn't seriously backfire...But I need help, and nerdfiteria seems to be one of the uniquely positive places still on the internet.
Here it goes:
Recently I seem to have developed this belief that the cesspool comments sections of social media are evidence that most humans are terrible and sadistic. The underlying belief to that belief is that social media has provided an unfiltered amplification of human nature. That belief consequently leads me to the idea that social progress is pretty much pointless and that, as a human, I must also be inherently terrible. Unfortunately, those beliefs are causing me a tremendous amount of emotional anguish. I've been trying to find some scientific perspectives on comments and social media engagement which could potentially lead to a more positive outlook.
Please help, nerdfighters. Does anyone know of any videos, books, or thoughts that will help me past this crushing existential crisis?
I think a lot of it comes down to Hank"s Point of imagining others complexly. It is way easier to see an other person as a complex human being if you are face to face with them, instead of only seeing some text on a screen. So what we see isn't unfiltered through about humans but it's a look into a society where people stop to see each other as humans. It shows us the importance of humanity by removing it.
I think it's more that comment sections attract the worst people. People who don't get to say much irl or who don't have anyone who listens to them. That makes them more likely to feel the need to yell at the internet, but also makes them sad and angry. People whith fulfilling lives also often don't have as much time for comment sections. Plus, social media algorithms prefer comments that get a lot of interaction/discussion, regardless of how productive the conversation is, so you are more likely to see the worst comments. It's true that there are bad people, and there is probably something bad in all of us, but most of us still try to be nice to each other. On the internet, there just happen to be a lot of mechanisms that select for hateful "conversations".
Rebekah Lynne Rebekah Lynne You’re making broad generalizations of the comments section and all social media. The truth is that the overwhelming majority of people aren’t a-holes online, it’s just that those are the ones that get the most attention. Many good things happen through social media. I’ll list some of them here: people have been rescued or found, animals have found new homes, lost animals have been found and even reunited with owners, people have gotten proper diagnosis for things that had mysterious symptoms or people have realized that a photo held a clue to diagnosis, it’s where people share stories of kindness, and help lift each other when they need it, etc. Look for the good around you in the stories, comments, tweets, or pictures that are shared online. People on the internet, like drunk people aren’t really that way in real life. It’s only a part of who they are, in the same way that you behave and speak a certain way when speaking to your parents and talking to friends, or strangers. And while humans do have similarities, comparing yourself to the larger universe to put yourself down doesn’t do anyone any good. You’re not a terrible person by extension. When I have spiral thoughts like you’re having I acknowledge that what I’m thinking is irrational, remind myself that this kind of thinking never gets me anywhere and then refocus my mind on something else. I refocus by thinking about how to make a cake or trying to remember all the lyrics to bohemian rhapsody or making a to do list or playing with my cat. Just anything where I have to be mentally present and can’t ruminate for long periods. It gets easier over time. Sometimes talking it out with someone might help you find perspective if you need a conclusion. Hope it helps
I have a podcast recommendation that I think could help you work through this: Conversations With People Who Hate Me, created by Dylan Marron. In it, people who were unkind to each other online take their conversations offline. I think it does a good job of showing that cruel online commenters are human and worthy of empathy.
Thank you so much to those of you who have taken the time to read and respond. And thanks for not judging. It really means a lot to me. And I will genuinely take these things to heart. ❤️
It is pragmatically useful to offer at least a token award for participation and effort because it's more useful to have people trying and failing than to have them not trying at all, because the more people we have trying the better the odds of someone or another succeeding. Incentivizing participation and effort generates more success. There does of course still need to be even greater incentive for success lest we end up encouraging a culture of only token efforts, but there needs to be a difference in result between trying-and-failing and not-trying if we want (as we should) to encourage more people to at least try.
I am currently stressed with the preparation for some standardized tests. This video has brought a delightful smile on my face
Thanks John
This channel is the best reminder that no matter what, you can find something extraordinary in something ordinary. Thank you both for what you do!
I'm loving that beard
John got a participation trophy for it :P
The new season of Bojack Horseman can wait. One of the vlogbrothers uploaded a video.
Marie Lastname it’s not as good as last season anyway. You made the right choice
+TheOrangeOne Well, I sure made the right choice based on my wish to watch every vlogbrothers video as soon as possible after the upload and my wish to just watch the new BoJack Horseman before I come across any spoilers. But I went back to watching BoJack pretty much instantly after watching John's video. Right now I'm watching the episode with the lesbian couple talking. (Don't want to spoil anything for anyone.)
This is really great, John! I always worked really, really hard in elementary school, but I was so average at everything. There was and still is nothing I am actually really "good" at. At the end of the year I sat there during awards ceremonies, knowing that I would never win an award. I laughed and joked and said, "It's cause I don't care!" But I cared a lot. After elementary school I told myself that no matter how hard I tried, I am stupid so I'll never get good grades. What would be the point in trying? So I spent the rest of my school life not caring or trying or working hard and I really regret it and have really poor self-esteem because of it. But there was one shining moment in grade 8 when our Drama teacher gave an award to everyone, and each one was based on their own individual talents or personality. Someone was funny or really liked cheese, I dunno. It was a really special moment to actually stand up there and get an award. I also really loved getting participation ribbons in races because it meant that I tried and I did something and I Was a part of something. ANYWAY I think participation and effort deserves acknowledgement.
John Green playing sports is me playing sports. I was a very dedicated reserve member of my school's U16 D hockey team.
Participation trophies are the worst. I never asked for the participation trophies that older generations mock people my age with, they were given to us by that generation.
I'm a Millennial that works with a bunch of people old enough to be my parent. Conversations at work go like this:
Them: The problem with your generation is that you got trophies for showing up. That ain't how it works in the real world!
Me: aren't you getting paid right now because you showed up and punched in, despite the fact you've been playing Yahtzee on your phone and doing your scratch-offs all night when you should be taking care of your patients?
Them:...
Me:... (thinking) I broke you
I love participation trophys. I love the reminders of everywhere I've been. I love being able to say I may not have been the best but i put in the time and hard work to go somewhere and compete when most of my peers were at home playing video games. I love that the event planners recognize that without the 50 losers showing up the competition would never happen, and i love it when they show their appreciation.
So many people say that you don't get trophies just for showing up because that's not how the world works, but that's basically exactly how the world works. 70% of any job I have had is about being present and on time and being a parent/sibling/significant other isn't about being the best at changing diapers, it's about being there to change the diapers.
Participation trophies rock because they show us that even if you're not the best person at x thing the fact that you actually showed up matters. I lobe participation trophys because i love it when people participate in life!
Do I get a trophy for sobbing at every one of these videos?
Ditto.
My partner of almost 4 years taught me a similar less 2 years or so ago, I would always compliment them for being good at art and attempt to bolster their confidence in their future with reminders that theyd been featured in art galleries or had won prizes. Eventually they told me that they were much more comforted when I told them theyd be okay because they were a dedicated hard worker.
I love everything about this video! I think often too much emphasis is placed on leadership and individuals' accomplishments and not enough credit given to collaboration and teamwork.
I think effort is more important then achievements, if you’re only going for a trophy then you’re not having fun
Yep, plus most of the technical skills that'll get you trophies as a kid, like sports, aren't terribly applicable to adult life. However, work ethic is.
What a stupid attitude to life, well the patient is dead but at least I tried my best
I like men
Same. I like girls too tho.
I like everybody
+Johnny Dugas I only have two wisdom teeth.
Johnny Dugas my tailbone is a weird shape
Honestly, one of the most heartwarming videos you've done.
Every once in a while I think about systems. I'm really grateful you point out the things that get rarely talked about.
Totally irrelevant, but I don't really understand the shape of John's head.
Leah Grace It’s the Jimmy Neutron type.
UltimateKyuubiFox oh you're %100 right. Thanks for ruining John's head for me
This video made me smile. That might not seem like a lot, but it is to me. Thank you John!
John makes me tear up just by him being him and its not fair. Im crying in the club rn
Great job! This video pleases me. It pleases me greatly.
I especially like the we are striving togeather bit at the end.
I love this, and couldn't agree more.
Just like a million other 'smart kids' I was praised a lot and rewarded for my achievements, rather than the effort I put into them. It made me into someone who's demotivated unless she's achieved something big, but even then the motivation only lasts a day or two because then it's time for the next achievement.
It's taken me years to even start to work towards being someone who forgives herself not being perfect, and appreciates effort more than results.
I wish I'd received more 'participation trophies' than 'real' ones growing up.
I got a different story about the "participation trophy". In my country we play a package game during Christmas where all participants bring small and cheap present (usually it's useless items wrapped in) and then compete to steal each others presents by rolling dices.
It's a fun game among family and friends.
When my four year old niece wanted to join the game nobody took any of the presents she was collecting by taking them from the other participants.... which made her gleeful... but then when uncle here finally got two sixes, I took a present from her huge pile of presents.. and she began to cry... and I was on a roll so I just unapologetic continued taking presents from her with me and the others telling her that it was part of the game. She wanted to join in which meant she could lose like anyone else in the game with no special treatment. When suddenly all this occurred to her, she had a blast.. and enjoyed the game even more.
Losing was part of game, and like any games, if you don't learn that aspect and learn how to lose, you're setting yourself up for difficulties in interacting with other people. She learned it and it was fun.
Sorry about the language.
I really like when your videos play off one another. This is now two in a row that build off of the one before.
How come, after like 11 years of making videos, they still manage to be so so so good?!!?
Oh, I had a similar experience to John but it was in high school and thus potentially more sad. I joined my high school diving team and I was terrible (as in I didn't meet basic qualifications for meets). Most of the other divers were also gymnasts and everyone was better than I was. At the end of the year the coach gave out prizes and cards.
On mine she wrote (she knew by this point that I had decided not to do it again the next season, partly because I sucked at it but also because I wanted to do drama instead)
"I wish all my girls worked as hard as you."
This memory does not hurt me or discourage me and I appreciated my coach's comment. We both knew I was not going to be a great diver. But she saw how hard I worked and I was proud of myself for sticking with it and for continually working hard the whole season even though I generally sucked. I got back up on that board after every time that I entered the water (usually badly).
In the grand scheme of things, does winning any trophy or competition matter? Whatever motivations there are, intrinsic or external, they exist to help us to keep striving. It is the striving that matters and creates growth and that should always be celebrated.
It doesn't mean telling someone that they have achieved something they haven't or not correcting them on their performance. Recognition of participation can simply recognise that it is brave to give things a shot, especially when there is no guarantee you'll ever get good at it. It is brave to love and care about something and put your sweat and effort in, especially when the outcome is not what you wanted.
I will probably never be a good diver but I hope what I learned from it has made me a good teacher.
My high school track coach used to give participation awards and speech usually included “you did something. You took the initiative to join the team, come to practice, and pick an event.” There were fancier awards for placing at meets or making the state championship, but he always wanted to reinforce the message that taking initiative and trying something was a good thing, even if the results were terrible
John, you are always an All-Star in our hearts.
You are such a thoughtful and beautiful human. This absolutely made my day - thank you for sharing.
so much goodness, laughter, and perspective in under 4 min. thank u for that.
Your mom sounds like a master of teaching "growth mindset" rather than "fixed mindset". As a teacher and a dad, I think this is exceedingly important. Great job, Momma Green!
For the life of me, I don't know how I stumbled onto both your channels, but I am so glad I did. 💕
"usually I didn't get in until we were up or down by at least five goals"
idk why this is so hilarious
Seriously, another amazingly well put together, entertaining and thought provoking video!
Every video on this channel is a stand-alone stunningly powerful reason to be subscribed. 💚
i absolutely adored every moment of this video - John, dah! you're a sort of champion of lovableness; whenever i see a new vid of yours pop up in subscribes i launch myself onto it like cat being conned by a trick of the light. thank you for never failing to cheer me up.
You and Hank are your parents participation trophy and all star trophyThey weathered all the trials and tribulations of raising two amazing sons. And you both love each other, openly and sincerely. That is awesome