Excellent Video Tim, my ex (Muslim from Zamboanga) would never allow me to travel to her home, she would say too dangerous for me as an American even though she was an upper class local with a military family. She would say the NPA mingle amongst the locals. Her relatives wanted me to visit anyway since I was brown skin (hispanic), would not stand out. She taught me how to always be respectful and be humble to the locals throughout the Philippines and in turn they will take good care of you.
she a lied to you.. NPA's are new peoples army.. a Christian rebel group..😂 they are not present to those muslim territories.. because they already have far worst groups like MILF and ISIS.. don't ever go to south of mindanao or else you will ends up like that blogger..
Hello Tim, I must acknowledge and thank you for hitting the nail directly on it's head. I am 66 years old, part Asian and part white. I was born and raised in Makati, Manila and left the Philippines as a 12 year old. I have witnessed many an American or westerner become humbled at the playground or park because they were just too cocky for the local basketball players. You do not get ahead by putting anyone down in the Philippines.
I worked overseas for over 25 years. I found that being humble and very polite allowed me to prosper and really do well. The day I retired, I moved back to the US as there is no place like America.
No matter where you are in the world, it’s essential to treat others with kindness and respect. Remembering to stay grounded can make a meaningful difference in how we connect with those around us.
Here are some observations and perceptions from the other side: As an easterner, I would like to say that when we visit a western country, we're always on tenterhooks, being scared of very rigid laws and customs (like not touching a stranger when speaking), we're always on alert so as not to do anything wrong and get intro trouble with the rigid law enforcement agencies (litigation risk is so high). Also, people are very isolated in the west and are skeptical of strangers, that's why it's very difficult to demand help when you need it . These things put a lot of stress on me when I have to visit a western country.
man i dont really watch your vids even tho im seeing you in my feed. but this couple of vids that you made regarding about the american made me appreciate the quality of content that you do. please continue to provide honest and no bs guide to the philippines.
I live in Vietnam with my Vietnamese wife. As long as you always possess the "I'm a visitor here" mentality, you'll be fine. It's those that start believing that the country they're in owes them something or needs them there, they quickly find out they made a mistake. When a citizen frustrates you, it's always best to smile and walk away.
Hi, I was looking to visit a foreign country in SE Asia mostly because it's cheaper. Can't figure out which countries to go. Vietnam seems like one of the best out of all. Phil gets a lot of typhoons. What place in Vietnam do you think a foreigner should visit. I found some farm stays on Airbnb
@@MillenialDreams He was looking for trouble. He was always wearing boxers only, even outside his wife's house, and on the streets. He was doing flirty and sexist videos with a Muslim teenage girl and posted them on TikTok. Aren't you aware Muslims wear very conservatively? The shorts for men should always extend way below the knees, they should always wear head dresses, etc. I am sure he was warned multiple times about his behavior and dressing but he kept ignoring them.
appreciate your video, i just came back from IloIlo. (Oct 5-19. 3rd time in PH ) and I was listening to a foreign couple ( not from US ) having a conversation with the bar hotel staff about former president Duerte. I told my fiance who is Filipino, lets get away from this conversation, and we got up and moved far away to another area in the resort. I will never ever talk about politics in a country where I'm staying. i learned that lesson years back when I used to visit the Dominican Republic. Its none of my business and I stay clear from it always. I still plan to retire in PH because my experiences have been wonderful. i know where to go and where not to go, what to say and what not to say. its been going great for me.
@madrical777: Good advice to anyone in another country whether you live there or are a tourist. Not your country, not you politics, not your business. Stay out of it!
Actually non-citizens talking about filipino politics is a crime just like US. It is interference of sovereign country's politics. In US they don't enforce it.
I had one expat that built a very large two story home with a pool tell me that he went into that knowing he would have to build the walls higher than normal around it, literally and figuratively. You want to block what you built and what you have from as many eyes as possible if you're a Westerner looking to have a Western style of comfort and not wanting to live more simply. And that goes for workers you hire and even extended family members. That last group maybe even more than anything. But it was his wife that helped him understand that in the beginning. The woman you marry is one of the most important decisions you will ever make. Choose wisely. Take your time even if you feel time is running out. It might not end up happening but that's better than marrying a bad woman.
Envy hmmm Yes before I married my ,, GURL,, she had 10+ close friends in her group Now 2 ..and there jealous as ,,f,, .. because she now has everything .. house farm.overses travel cars new motor bike..I also pay her ,,mum only,, medical expenses..
@@Jimmy-mx4cc Just having a foreign boyfriend is enough even if she gets nothing much. The filipinos turn against eachother way more than they do against foreigner in my opinion
ENVY plays all over the world. You singleing Philippines 🇵🇭 as one is very UNFAIR & rude!! If you feel like that in MY country, you are free to leave anytime!😠
You make an important point. I have seen and heard many complaints from other Americans about life abroad. Many of them seem never to have visited anywhere else, just a straight shot from Kentucky to the Philippines, or something similar. Developing your travel portfolio really helps you put things in perspective. Congrats on the anniversary, btw. :)
Using Kentucky isn't quite fair. It's a different world and life for most folks there. The larger cities don't count and are definitely not representative of the rural folks across the State. Maybe half the population of each of the 120 counties, have never even see the next county over. Then some have traveled extensively and have just found their spot to call it a day in a beautiful hardwood forest! 😉
This is 100% what everyone needs to hear. I left the US to live in Eastern Europe, And then Asia. it doesn't matter where you are in the world. As Americans we are too care free, open, personal. And too many Americans want to "brag" I lived in a Eastern European country that Americans have been deleted in, because they bragged about money, status, made fun of locals choice in clothes, and the food they eat. Americans watch too many bloggers talk about how amazing things are and never talk about the realities you face in these countries.
Americans are anamolies in Europe especially Eastern Europe. They don't understand that bragging and forcing your existence on others is not considered positive outside of the U.S.
Thank you for this...and next time those people bragging about being expats and how wonderful their new nation is and how bad so many things in the US are, when they get kidnapped, don't expect US taxes to be spent for the CIA, FBI, and Special Forces to look for and rescue you. Personally, I love losing these people with no loyalty or patriotism to the US, because when the next great war starts that the world, once again, expects the US to save them from as evil countries like China, Russia, NK, and the Middle East try to collectively dominate, I'd rather they incompetent brainwashed, disloyal US citizens to already have self-selected out and moved. But, as usual, I'm sure they will all start crying and begging for the US to save them. Good comments; thanks. (I will add that the only main issue your succinct post didn't touch on is how a majority of foreigners come to the US and feel entitled, get free services, and yet don't show US citizens or our nation respect or try to assimilate into our culture. This is also a reality that most won't address for fear of being called xenophobic, racist, and other derogatory terms.)
Yes very well said, People’s are saying he’s a loan shark in that Parts of The southern, That Even Filipinos Afraid to go … And I watch one of his Videos… Titled Living in a Dangerous parts of the Philippines as American and he’s bragging… But he’s just a kid just ignore the warning, I hope they bring him back safe …. 🙏🙏🙏
Yes, I've seen quite a few Americans here brag and get themselves into strife. They don't seem to be able to read the situation and shut up. But then British, Australian and Europeans sometimes act the same way too
What you said about people being so interconnected is SO true. It is not to your benefit to humiliate anyone as you never know the family, relatives or connections you have offended. I keep my opinions solely to my wife, not even to her family to ensure everyone saves face.. I have learned to always leave an Asian the opportunity to save face which carried into my life here in the states, too..
Well said, Tim. What I have noticed in most Asian countries I have been to is if you show people respect and appreciate their culture, they will normally show you the same respect. Laugh with them and they laugh with you. What you have said is great advice for people who haven't travelled enough and spent real time in these proud countries.
That's very much true in any country and place, not just in Asia. Know the culture of the country and respect it, and people will also respect you. Of course be cautious as well. The Philippines in general is safe but there are areas where you really have to be aware of the environment.
@@jimbo8888 disagree totaly they friendly about small nonsence but if u get screwed by one or group not them that they know at best they stay out of it. They are never yiur friends to trust and count on. Aka experience in panama. Essentially you are only good for taking from not giving to.
My filopina's wife's brother overtook another Filipino near our house. They were both on motor bikes. My wife was sat on a hillside a little further up the road. She was using her laptop and trying to get a better signal to do some school work being a teacher during lockdown. The Filipino took offence at being overtaken by her brother, stopped his bike next to them, proceeded to take out a handgun, and held it against my wife's head. She then pleaded with him not to shoot and apologised for her brother overtaking him. He then put away the gun and carried on his way. Early next morning, my wife's mother waited at the roadside for him to appear, standing in the middle of the road she forced him to stop and gave him a piece of her mind threatening to report him to the police. It turned out that his brother was a local police officer and the gun belonged to him. Anyway, the gunmen started crying and was full of remorse, so the matter went no further. For me, living in the west at the time. I felt she should have had him arrested for what is in the west, a very serious crime. But here in the Philippines, they certainly do things differently. I don't think I'll ever understand the culture here, but thank God for my wife having a very brave mother
Hi Kelvin, as a Filipino American let me explain this to you; Your mother in law as an elder holds a ranking respect status. Even though what happened to you guys on that night was serious, in the Philippines if an issue no matter how serious it might be as long as you didn't killed or you or someone got killed can always be talked it out. For us, there's always solution to an issue, police, barangay officials are the last resort. But, don't mistaken that as a sign that you can just disrespect someone just then and there. I know here in the United States we always have common courtesy and respect but to me thats o ly superficial. Respect in the Philippines is more complicated and deep all the way through your soul.
@@entertexthere1127 like the respect of threatening to shoot someone for being overtaken, lol. Just say it is a culture where little feelings are hurt way to fast, lol
The older I get the thing I know is that I don't know anything especially here in the Philippines 🇵🇭🇺🇸. Been here since 2019 and still learning new things every day but that's part of the adventure of being here
This is some of the best information you'll get on living in the Philippines. I too live in the province. No matter how frustrated I may get I never forget that I'm a visitor in someone else's home.
I've lived here in Cebu for 12 1/2 years and nothing suprises me anymore but I have never gotten into any disputes. I've learned bisaya and just made my own path. I've never got into a physical face to face dispute with anyone. Anything that happens or if I want to complain I just directly go to the barangay Kaptain and or video it. Seven years in the city and the rest in the province. Foreigners will always be second rate in the Philippines. One thing I've learned though that people never do anything unless you offend them. Different islands treat people differently. Cebu, Negros Occ, Iloilo, Leyte, and Samar are all different.
Islands tend to be like that. I've been told that about the windward islands in the Caribbean, some islands are dangerous others very welcoming... Being Venezuelan gives me the possibility to describe this in a more vivid way.
I once heard that there are so many different dialects (over 80) that you have to be c artful what you say because a word in one area might mean something negative in another area In other words, people are touchy and will take offense easily
I am Christian in a Muslim area. One rule we don't forget is not to marry a muslim girl if you don't convert to Islam. It can end very badly for you. It happens all the time even for Filipino christians.
@@andrevdende8244it is a beautiful faith. Most of us will not compromise our beliefs. As a Vietnamese Muslim I am proud of our traditions that unite Muslims worldwide.
It’s a great way to make those who don’t follow your religion submit, imagine not being Muslim living there, all the women can be taken by Muslim men but you can’t have any since you’re not part of the club
I came to the Philippines first in 1999. Your assertion that NOT loosing face is spot on. Understanding this well is critical. Many Americans seem to think the world is their Disney. Even still, many get away with pure idiocy, but sometimes, they do not.
and when it doesn't work out, it may involve legal problems, visa problems, jail, deportation. Unless of course, you just get beaten up by a mob. One pissed off person will often attract a crowd really fast, especially if a foreigner is involved. Even if he wasn't trying to do that to you... it will just happen. And you get to pay the hospital bill, what a winner...... too bad, never mind.
The Philippines is very simple. When it comes to living as a foreigner in the provinces, you'll get all the love and respect from everyone just as long as you are respectful, polite, and keep yourself out of the drama that you'll find simmering all around you. Put your wife and her family in front of you and let them be your shield from any drama that tries to find its way to you.
My Grandpa was a merchant marine, traveled all around the world his whole career, one piece of advice he gave me that came to mind when hearing about this was "Never flash a wad" Meaning don't ever flaunt money in front of people, especially cash.
keep it hidden in separate little 'stashes' all over your body or clothing. So that only a little is bought out or shown at any one time. You go to a bar, only the next note value up from the price of a drink is offered.... maybe you have two notes of that value.... ok, but you should be OK with that. Then you have some more money somewhere else, for later. That sort of thing works.
Well said Tim, I live in Mexico (I'm white and my wife is Mexican). I need to remind myself often that I am a guest in their country and always will be.
So never stay in the same place for too long. 2 years max. Rent instead of buying. Because when you rent, you are flexible to go or stay. As soon as they know you and they just think what you are. Then it stays that way in their heads. (Rich, poor, bluff, weak, crazy etc)
As an american in taiwan I agree with you about never going to be asian . I've been here for 15yrs now and I still feel like a foreigner and people treat me as such . It's ok though because I'm more comfortable being on my own anyways. But yeah that's something foreigners need to know .
When filipinos can speak with you fluently in their local dialect, you are as close as you can get to becoming unnoticed as a foreigner. My brother in law speaks tagalog fluently and for the most part, we always forget he is a Republican.
And yet, the expect the protection of the US. Are they enjoying the constant, increasing encroachments in the South China Sea, the manmade islands they turn into military outposts, and the recent blockade/quarantine by the Chinese navy?! Maybe we should just let them try to did their pompous ass out of this one...and we all KNOW where THAT would end up.
Do people really think they will ever be seen as the same? I had an uncle from India that passed away recently and he never felt truly American. He would watch Jerry Springer to laugh at the Caucasians and feel better about not being a White Anglo Saxon Protestant (WASP) that founded the nation. If you're a European-American and you live in SE Asia be happy to be to be yourself. It comes with benefits in most countries and really no unique drawbacks aside from everyone will think you're rich. Maybe you are, maybe you are not. You can set those boundaries early on. Don't go to the Rolex store and then walk around with the bag in public view unless you're staying in BGC. Even then it's probably a dickhead move.
My dear, I'm so lucky to bump into your video tonight. As of today, you have become my second sociology professor. All along, I don't know the world is divided into two, The east, which is the world of shame, causing the victim to retaliate and then West, which is the world of guilt, causing Justice to get involved. Wow, this has become an eye-opener for me.....
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TIM AND CHRISSY! I attended your wedding via UA-cam. I married a Filipina co-worker here in the US, the OC Timoy. She grew up in Tacloban. The stories she told me about her father getting drunk and challenging everyone to a fight were disturbing. Because he caused a neighbor to 'lose face' they had to move several time to different areas to avoid the harassment. So it is cultural. Foreigner or not mind your own business. Be respectful, we are just visiting. The Filipino Americans are very respectful, honest, hard working and they mind their own business. Thanks for your thoughts Tim. Words to live by.
Tim, your face has really cleared up man! I admit to not having seen you in a while. You look great! Looks like you've been eating well and taking good care of yourself.
Tim i watched id say 98 percent of your videos and being in my late 60s and lived on and off in the Philippines since 1981 and marrying a Filipino l must say l admire you especially hearing your admissions on your findings and your wrongs and to me that makes a better man and person of you, thanks Tim for your thoughts and findings and best wishes for the future and also your beautiful wife, take care 🙏
Wise words Tim K. I have been travelling and visiting the Phillipines since 1996. Such a beautiful place and wonderfull people. Pack mentality is the way. I have seen it over and over. Piss off the wrong people and your paradise will turn into a hell. Don't try to change it, just enjoy the hospitality and be respectfull. Your experience will always be positive.
There is a river near where I live, and about a mile southeast from a local bridge is the hunting ground for a bevy of otters. I go there throughout the season and lie silently and watch that family get on with their busy lives. I've seen three generations of whelps bless that riverbank. So be damned with people and their sensitivity based on supposed moral superiority and childish fears. They can keep their "beautiful" countries and all their oppressive oddities. I will go visit my otter romp any day over their country of confused "-isms".
He has been warned and due to his arrogance and ignorance of the local culture still persisted in living and even marrying a Muslim woman without considering their religious norms! It is difficult to be have any sympathy for this person.
Losing face is dangerous you're right. In Thailand, I meet a nice 'Lady'. We got along well. While having coffee, she told me she was actually a Ladyboy. I didn't get angry. I reacted honestly and kindly. I apologized several times explaining I wasn't interested. I tried to be very empathic and understand him. He reacted by saying, 'You are a kind man.' We had another coffee enjoying conversation together. We parted ways on a positive note. What could have a disaster with another man turned into a positive experience.
A similar thing happened to me over there. I made the choice to see what it would be like and my butt was sore for weeks bro. Definitely saved a lot of trouble though by saying yes.
When you're traveling NEVER presume. However familiar the country may feel to you it is not your country. Remember that you are a guest in their country.
I’m Filipino with a fil-Am mother and Filipino-chinese dad. I totally agree with 95% of what you shared in this video and I appreciate how you approach the subject. I think that your experience applies mostly to living in the countryside aka “province.” This is why I always tell any foreign friend to stick to the cities and urban areas for safety and to minimize the cultural difference. I think that you and your wife are very fortunate that you are willing to adapt to the local lifestyle and culture but not all foreigners are like you. With that said, thank you again for sharing your thoughts and analysis in the video. I wish more expats get to watch this before moving to the Philippines. God bless
This is ridiculous. While the US has its share of problems, including crime, nowhere do you constantly hear it said to "always be vigilant" to people traveling in, immigrating to, or born in the US. You also don't hear these constant warnings about the UK, Canada, Australia, Scandinavia, and a lot of Europe...but we sure do about a lot of Latin America, Mexico, the Middle East, the PI, and much of the rest of Asia. One should always have situational awareness, but the very fact that you and so many other PI expats and expats (and merely travelers) in certain other countries feel the need to constantly express this speaks volumes about what crappy countries they are an a fundamental difference between them and decent, developed, western nations. And, too bad that same humble advice isn't shared by most immigrants TO those developed, western nations.
@@Theodicy101No it's because far too many westerners have an attitude so it's best to warn others to be careful. I lived in several very safe East Asian countries, but you still should be humble and respectful as a guest.
Hi Tim , I was previous viewer of your channel and at first I didn’t like you I won’t mention why but life has humbled me and I appreciate your channel and things you speak about Eliot . I have subbed.
So true, showing respect in the philippines goes a hell of a long way, whether you are talking to some big shot or a local farmer, respect and humility goes further than any amount of money.
If you plan to live in a different culture, then take time to learn that culture, and especially learn what not to do in that culture. You are not entitled to be there. Good Job Tim K!
Does that also apply to the millions of foreigners in the US--a ton illegally--who commit crimes, get free money, services, food, lodging, and other benefits, while not trying to assimilate and act entitled...not to mention harming our nation and showing no loyalty...but only trying to change it to the lousy country from which many of them came?!
Thank you for that. A lesson for many to learn. I have been married into a Filipino family since 2010. Never a truer word said and very measured. Still recently retired from the uk and living with my middle daughter and here husband and my grandchildren. Although my wife passed away 2022. I could not be happier, expecting when my other two daughers are home and maybe my kids from UK are over. (Stepdaughters)
I've been married to a filipina for over 38 years, built a home in Samar, traveled a lot, and have spent over 8 years living in the Philippines. I learned a long time ago that when you think you have things figured out, you absolutely don't (though, I can cook a pot of rice as fast as anyone). I know what you should and shouldn't do and I'm still learning. Tim is right, the cultural intricacies run very deep here and can get you in trouble faster than the speed of love in hooker town. 🌴😎
Thanks for giving me a new perspective about the guilt and shame culture! Couples of months ago I started posting clips in facebook of drivers with no regard to others' safety. Like those who still keep going to my lane despite of flashing my headlight and honking and other traffic violations. I thought it will work coz youtubers posting these kind of content in the west are even being supported by a lot of followers. But here in the Philippines, people hated me. They hate that I am not letting other drivers get away of wrong behaviors they've presented on the public road. Now, these views helped me as well as a Filipino.
It's not nearly as common, but they do exist. My wife is Thai and enjoys listening to some Thai comedians on occasion. The humor is much different, though, as you noted. They're not poking fun at people individually.
@anthonyantoine9232: Anthony, having lived in both Thailand and the PI they are two different worlds apart. In Thailand you can get public workers motivated in their office by getting real excited to the point the headman comes out and probably says "do whatever needs to be done because I don't want him back in here". That's after pursuing the regular routes with no success. Try that in the PI once and the guy riding on a pillion will put one in you. The locals I can get along with. The expat crowd not anymore. And BTW, I don't live in the PI anymore and haven't since 2013 but I still live in SEA but stay away from expats. I did hear about that guy down in Zamboanga. Not very smart and the people that get on utube and tell the world how safe it is there should have their necks rung. I did live in Davao city for three years and yep, safe during the day! 23 years and four countries and everyone is different. Also, things like the expat crowd aren't the same as they were in the early-mid 2000s. People used to be that they understood you were over here because you disliked your country too for the most part. Now they dislike you because of where you came from and they know right away from your accent. Trust me.
Not really true because I am from Poland and we have tons of comedians taking the piss of ourselves as the nation but British humour I think is the best in the world ever hehehehe 😅😅😅😅
Hey Tim, good feedback! My Filipina wife and I have been married for over 28 years. She is from Naval, Biliran Province. Located on the very northern tip of Leyte. Complicated is an understatement. One of her high school classmates is an attorney in town and she has become very corrupt and seems to find more time working on her Facebook page than on her caseload. She is always posturing on facebook on how important she is and is sure to let everyone know when she travels to Europe on vacation. Imagine that, going on vacation to Europe as a small town provincial prosecuting attorney! Anyway, a few weeks ago while having my usual "night cap" before bed, I see one of her postings and I make an editorial comment(honestly cannot remember what it was), and by the time I wake up the next morning, she is over to my mother in laws house threatening charging me with cyber bullying! Honestly, am really not that type of person, but I think she was publicly convicted by my comments and embarrassed with her large following. Something like that happens here, we blow it off and move on, especially if there are elements of truth to it. BUT, like you stated, it does not work that way in the Philippines. Anyway, the politics, complications, noise level at night, lack of infrastructure, pollution, etc has relegated our max future visits to perhaps 3 months/year and possibly less. We just recently came back from a 6 week stay and I look at the Philippines as more of an activity stay(scuba, sightseeing) now rather than considering it as a retirement destination. I think my Filipina wife is happy to stay away from the Philippines as it was noisy as hell during the night and the both of us got little sleep from all of the inconsiderate neighbors. Anyway, certainly not has nice as it was 30 years ago and I agree that going to those areas less travelled are the way to go. As ex-military, I also am extremely cautious to not advertise my presence and stay as low key as possible while there. Our itinerary is not even shared with our local family. We trust no one.
Very wise words, my man. I'm 67 and have been in Davao since June of 2024, I've come to the conclusion that I'll always be on the outside looking in. Hell, even in my home around the dinner table, I feel alienated because everyone will slip into their native language. Never once thinking of me sitting right there in front of them. And that's just one of many situations I experience daily. I try to be humble ( quite ) most of the time, but there are days when I want to scream at people. I've been blatantly cheated, lied to, and ignored. It's my opinion that there are a lot of passive-aggressive people here, and that's probably because of the shaming culture. Confrontation isn't a thing here, regardless of who is in the right or wrong. Forgive and forget, or just live with it.
Tim, the point about walking humbly is a good idea in any situation, caring about others, caring about animals and the world/environment. I also think it's great to explore one's own country and outside of it, but you also bring up an interesting comparison about cultural differences and how welcoming or not they are. To me, it's long been obvious that "strength in diversity" is one of the biggest socio-political lies ever told, and the rising diversity and declining native culture and civilization in the US, Scandinavia, Canada, Australia, and a lot of Europe is proof. Hungary finally figured it out and is finally contructing better border control and kicking out a lot of the ones they let in in the past few years...ones, like in the US and other countries I just mentioned, that have a vastly different religion and culture, and who not only DON'T want to conform TO the new culture but actually want it to conform to THEM and try to actively, even through bullying and terrorism to change it. Diversity works ONLY if the immigrants are very similar with their original culture to the country to which they are immigrating AND where they actually care about becoming a full part of that new country...e.g., Canadians moving to the US, Americans moving to the UK or Scandinavia, Aussies moving to a lot of Europe, etc.. In the US--and with many other "woke"/socialist/marxist-leaning governments, that has gone on increasingly over the past few decades--and which has reached a breaking point under the horrible "leadership" of Biden-Harris, has been to allow floods of immensely different cultures into our country, causing immensely more negatives than any possible positives...people who want to change the US into the very (to quote Trump, and it's true) "S**THOLE" countries from which they've come, to take full advantage of the US and its citizens while giving nothing in return, not being grateful, and not being loyal to their new country. While common courtesy and respect are important, it's important for a lot of these other nations, including a lot of developed "western"-type nations is that because of brave service men and women like you, Tim (Thank you again for your service!), and other citizens who sacrifice in many ways, we've saved the world's ass in two world wars (including the PI which would now be speaking Japanese if not for the US), and have overly funded NATO, the UN, and all sorts of humanitarian relief around the globe. I'm sick of the disrespect to the US--my nation which has its problems for sure, but which I love and of which I'm proud--and I think it's time to start excluding people, kicking many out, and kicking ass again and taking names around the world...and we should demand loyalty and for all allies to do their fair part...and we need to quit being so kind when we are the victors--especially when someone else starts problems (and also act when countries indirectly and cowardly cause problems but smile to our face--a great example being the Saudis). In the future, when we win a war, we should have a new US territory. Finally, who is the PI going to rely on when China gets even MORE aggressive in the South China Sea and Philippine territorial waters...and they WILL soon, as is obvious from their recent act of war against Taiwan, the increasing interference (including boat rammings) against the PI, BRICS, and many other things in their master plan of world domination. Decades ago, Americans were respected because the US was respected and feared, and it was generally safe to go almost anywhere. Today is a polar extreme in the way Americans are viewed and treated. The US needs to start drastically changing that, no matter how harsh they have to get.
Nearly everything you are saying in this video I can compare quite easily to here in Thailand. Thanks for spelling it out, even after nearly 25 years in this beautiful country I am still learning.
Former Philippines resident here. Things that can get you and your family k*lled in the Philippines: Staring at someone in the street or mall. Pointing your finger at someone or wagging your finger at someone to "come here". Insulting the Philippines country, culture or people. Embarrassing someone or acting aggressive to someone in public. This can be deadly. I have seen the reactions to foreigners doing the above things and it resulted in people dying. Remember, Filipino's are VERY sensitive to what you say to them, but not sensitive about what they say to you. Filipino's are not good at controlling their emotions as emotions are kept under control at home and they have very little experience handling emotional situations.
Well said, and yet another great reason why it's just better to avoid the PI and nations like it. A LOT more negatives than positives. And maybe, the next time a Filipino expects respect, including what is said to them and how it's said...but not showing the same courtesy in return, maybe they should remember who saved their ass in WWII from the Japanese, and where the PI will again beg assistance from the US when their problems with China get worse...as they will soon, it's obvious to anyone closely watching world events. Just ask Taiwan, Tibet, Nepal, and fishermen in the South China Sea!
This is way over exaggerated,most Filipinos couldn’t and wouldn’t hurt a fly.. i was in cebu city for many months and there were days I had to tell 3 guys to F-off because of their scammy ways or how they treated others in public. Cebu city is pretty hectic…everyone’s in a hurry,the people driving are terrible drivers,so inconsiderate… here in Canada we also have people who lose face sooo easily… we call them insecure baby boys… I felt good some days standing up for people being bullied by Filipino men or the never ending petty scams…but most days it drains the life out of you… so I went to a smaller city and problem solved haha I highly doubt you seen anybody killed,ever…neat story though.
thanks for your video. I came for dental work right after covid, ended up meeting my now wife after mourning 2 years after losing my childhood sweatheard and the begining of covid. Now while waiting for her visa to come i come twice a year to the philipinnes, her family is in Negros but we rent an apartment in manila. definetly a lot to leatn despite like you i traveled extensively, 87 countries so far, and i thank you for sharing as it truly helps to lower the learning curve. Heard a food saying "the smart man learns from his mistakes, the wise man learns from others". wish and praying the best for you.
Respect and humbleness…. Arrogance and disrespect will get anybody in trouble especially if you are an expat acting like you didn’t know(tanga/stupid). Good information Mr. Tim.😊🇺🇸🇵🇭
My parents are from a shame culture and I was raised in the US, but my family culture overtook the US culture especially as their only daughter. Needless to say, it wasn't easy living in two worlds simultaneously. Now that im older, I have a bigger appreciation for how i was raised. Thanks for the map!
I lived 8 months in the Philippines and I can't see any reason I would go back at this point. As a foreigner living in a small town there would be nuts, to much BS. Pros are beautiful women and lower cost of living but the fact you will never fit in and alone seen as an ATM by most people sucks.
I am a Filipino. He stayed in the wrong place where life is hard. He should have stayed in Subic or anywhere in Zambales where most Americans are staying and retires. Based on his video, he seems loud.
I'm married to a Filipina for 11 years and what this guy says above in 100% true. Please take his advice and never be cocky in anyway in the Philippines
I've watched your videos basically on and off for years, most just you and Chrissy's regular life, especially liked the videos where you taught about the reality of living in phillipines as expat like COL and laws. Just wanted to say, really great video man. My favorite of yours probably.
Just to clarify, a caucasian looking guy with blue eyes can be treated as a local filipino as long as he is fluent of the language. Chances are, this blue eyed caucasian is really a filipino. He is a local filipino and he considers himself a local filipino. I can see them in supermarkets. They look very much caucasian but they speak tagalog like the locals because they are locals. So, a caucasian guy can be treated as a local filipino as long as he speaks the language like the locals and he considers himself a local. If you think you are an expat, then don't dream to be treated like a local by the locals. You don't even consider yourself a local.
Great advice. Respect for others, their beliefs and their cultures is extremely important. I'm a retired veteran and I have done tours of duty in many countries. If you are new to globe trotting, start by visiting more cosmopolitan cities where foreigners are not so unusual. Also a country that has a majority Caucasian population is a safe bet, although you can still get into very sticky situations if you are not careful. Finally, do as much diligent research about the people, the culture, the beliefs and the customs of the country you are planning to visit. Take into account how the locals percieve people like yourself. As many people who are keeping themselves updated on world affairs, a certain "content" creator has made South Korea a less than hospitable place for black people to visit. Too often it is foreigners that behave badly that cultivates hostility from locals. Make no mistake, in some countries you can get killed for something you did out of ignorance. Never forget, you are a guest in their country.
And that's exactly right. Take for instance when becoming Filipino toured the mosque and telling everyone how safe and kind it is there and that the whole time he has arm guards with him just outside the video frame. I wonder if the Eastman kid watched his videos and listened to becoming Filipino telling him how safe it is
He sure fooled me!! And I thought he was a good honest guy. But it looks like he was working overtime as ambassador for that region!! I am beginning to find out a lot of YTers are not who they are!
Becoming Filipino did emphasize the need to coordinate with the local tourism office. There are parts of the Philippines that are still tribal/medieval where the overlords must be paid their dues for safe passage.
I think we’re missing the part where we ask the question, what could have Mr. Eastman done that caused this unfortunate thing happened to him? I know this sounded as victim blaming, but I think it’s a valid question, no?
Well said I am a Filipino but I prepare not to argue but instead step backward to avoid grudges and hatred which we do not know what a head on the streets is, it can kill you
Mahalo. I went to Pi a few years ago to surf and dive. Love the country as I grew up with many Filipina kids here in Hawaii, so the culture was familiar and comfortable. I would like to retire in the country. Thanks for your videos
Well i am a Veteran traveller to Phils. Was there 2 times in 2015 and in 2017 and in 2019 and in 2022 and now i go there again in 2024 in less than 14 days. Stay there 5 months.Got my own place to live in Phils allready. So stay safe and be humble and show respect to people in you area and they threat you well. Do not show off your money all time. Not a good idea. Just be nice to local people and they are nice back to you. I know people in my local area allready so i never cause any trouble in my neighbourhood. Then you can have a good life. Just play your cards right and you can have a safe life in phils.
I've lived in Cebu City since 2015...my asawa is from Cebu and i have nothing but good times here...m an american...thee politics of thee Philippines is none of my concern...i do not talk local or country politics...Nice country 2 live in...
Wow. Great message. Very insightful. I think what you said also applies to the local communities in Western towns and cities. They are very integrated. Often times I've heard that people back in the home town village know just as much as the local community. Not that surprising I guess but there are no secrets and the consequences are drastic and effect the whole family for shameful behaviour. I briefly dated a Vietnamese young lady and did not have a clue of the complexities of what I was getting involved in.
Your take on this is interesting. I've never heard of the culture divide by motivation/driving force (Guilt-shame-fear spectrum of cultures). Thanks for this informative video :)
Understanding the fundamental nature of respect is crucial to grasping the nuances of cultural dichotomy. Historically, the belief in cultural superiority has often precipitated devastating conflicts and loss of life. This is equally applicable on a personal scale, especially when one enters another's domain and disdainfully belittles it.
Tim, I’ve recently discovered your channel and am enjoying it very much, working sort of backwards. I’m in an LDR for 3 months now, planning to visit in May. She’s in the province, about 1.5 hrs. from Iloilo City. She’s Illonga. Do you have an opinion about Iloilo and the island of Panay in general? Thanks so much. Chris, 59.
Hi Tim, your video was quite informative and interesting and so dead on. Which means you understand our culture quite well, complicatedness & all. It is a beautiful country & we are a good race despite our faults, which can be many...but no other place will teach one to survive a multitude of different scenarios, and to survive well. I hope that you are happy here and that you and your family thrive well and prosper...
I gave a local Bali Grom a loaned board. He stole the fins and returned the board. I shamed him in public, and that’s where it all started….. your right Tim
Growing up in the Shame part of the world saying something about someones mother (especially in public) would lead to a blind rage and someone is getting violently hurt regardless of what your relationship with that person is. Then just specated the other side and how Mom stuff is thrown around casually was mind-blowing to me. Working years in tourism i would caitor to 200-300 people from all over the world every day to the point where i know where you are from before you even speak. I slowly learned that i need to tolerate there understanding of acceptable behavior (for example Turkish people like to snap there fingers at waiters) and this is what Tim is really talking about. You really have to know what is acceptable by being quite and observing every day interactions for quite a while... tourists edge me to getting a conviction daily at work and they don`t even realise it. I try to stay level headed but the shame and honor upbringing is super hardwired.
My parents and my older sister coming from germany lived in arab countries all the way trough the 80's. Aside from a cutural difference, there was also the iraq/iran war going on. Coming from germany, they adapted pretty quick and my dad even started to learn the language. One thing, that was basically self explanatory was that you respect their rules, their religion and their way of living. They quickly made friends and respected each other. Obviously there were also negative experiences in the daily life, also because of the war, but no where in the world will you always have peace and sunshine. It shows, that its always important to respect their ways, when you come to a new country. You cant act like a jackass, treat ppl bad around you and then expect them to just take it. Be correct, open minded and show some damn respect. Usually you will be fine.
Great video Tim 📹 your story is a true one. It's a shame that young guy didn't get to see it I'm married have lived in the Philippines 😢in and out over 20yers and still learning cheers take care you and your family Australia 🇦🇺.
in cebu i experienced yanks talking loudly in a fastfood restaurant for everyone to hear. they were complaining about the food, that's it's not up to US standards. it's harrassment but the people just ignored them so i ignored them as well. 😂
A lot of people say the hospitality in the Philippines is the best in the world. I haven't experienced that. It's not a chip my shoulders or expecting the same accommodations as the West...There are differences even in IT Park or BGC...The nicest areas of the Philippines....Some Expats are walking around thinking they are going to get 5 stars vacation for half the price... For me it's about being provided with what was promised, in expensive areas...If you are renting a apartment in a working-class neighborhood curb your expectations. If Wifi and Hot Water is listed, it should work upon arrival...50-100 dollars a night is enough to get a 4-star hotel, 5-star 200-300 dollars. If an Airbnb is charging that in the Philippines...It should smooth check in process and unbroken appliances. You have to wonder do the Hosts care? Not really, they have your money, and they don't. More often than not it seems, normal basic things we expect as guests simply go by the wayside. Waiting 45 minutes to check in at the Security Post because someone forgot to let them know you were coming or cleaning the apartment...Common. Now retail, If you ask for something is in stock, why tell me it's not but help my fiancé later? My patience has been tested and it seems like people feel they can speak to an Expat anyway they choose and not get a negative reaction. I have never yelled at someone or acted aggressive in the Philippines....But people have pushed the limits. The scams are real, the dismissiveness, the seemingly unprepared to handle basic tasks and questions.... Like you told me I can't exit through this door.... Where is the exit at an International Airport. At times it seems like insanity. Even questioning something you are told as being not right.... Is seen as a insult. Been lied to multiple times... This guy made so many mistakes, it’s clear he had no understanding of the culture he was entering…much less first hand experience. They were never going to accept him as a member of the community.
With over 50 years in Asia, I can confirm all your points. "Face" is the most important thing in the east. You can give face to someone or you can cause them to lose face. Losing face is a powerful motive for revenge. Good job, Tim.
Excellent Video Tim, my ex (Muslim from Zamboanga) would never allow me to travel to her home, she would say too dangerous for me as an American even though she was an upper class local with a military family. She would say the NPA mingle amongst the locals. Her relatives wanted me to visit anyway since I was brown skin (hispanic), would not stand out. She taught me how to always be respectful and be humble to the locals throughout the Philippines and in turn they will take good care of you.
she a lied to you.. NPA's are new peoples army.. a Christian rebel group..😂 they are not present to those muslim territories.. because they already have far worst groups like MILF and ISIS.. don't ever go to south of mindanao or else you will ends up like that blogger..
They can see you are Caucasian even if you believe into that sham of "brown skin."
Your ex-muslim?😂 hilariuos..
Hello Tim, I must acknowledge and thank you for hitting the nail directly on it's head.
I am 66 years old, part Asian and part white. I was born and raised in Makati, Manila and left the Philippines as a 12 year old. I have witnessed many an American or westerner become humbled at the playground or park because they were just too cocky for the local basketball players. You do not get ahead by putting anyone down in the Philippines.
I was there last year
I worked overseas for over 25 years. I found that being humble and very polite allowed me to prosper and really do well. The day I retired, I moved back to the US as there is no place like America.
America will always be a great place just like Denmark, Switzerland, Japan, Norway, Australia and Austria if and only if you can "afford" it.
No matter where you are in the world, it’s essential to treat others with kindness and respect. Remembering to stay grounded can make a meaningful difference in how we connect with those around us.
Here are some observations and perceptions from the other side: As an easterner, I would like to say that when we visit a western country, we're always on tenterhooks, being scared of very rigid laws and customs (like not touching a stranger when speaking), we're always on alert so as not to do anything wrong and get intro trouble with the rigid law enforcement agencies (litigation risk is so high). Also, people are very isolated in the west and are skeptical of strangers, that's why it's very difficult to demand help when you need it . These things put a lot of stress on me when I have to visit a western country.
man i dont really watch your vids even tho im seeing you in my feed. but this couple of vids that you made regarding about the american made me appreciate the quality of content that you do. please continue to provide honest and no bs guide to the philippines.
I live in Vietnam with my Vietnamese wife. As long as you always possess the "I'm a visitor here" mentality, you'll be fine. It's those that start believing that the country they're in owes them something or needs them there, they quickly find out they made a mistake. When a citizen frustrates you, it's always best to smile and walk away.
Hi, I was looking to visit a foreign country in SE Asia mostly because it's cheaper. Can't figure out which countries to go. Vietnam seems like one of the best out of all. Phil gets a lot of typhoons. What place in Vietnam do you think a foreigner should visit. I found some farm stays on Airbnb
@@timbell6615 elliot barely even left his house. He wasnt looking for trouble he was just an inexperienced kid.
Lol that sounds like the illegals that go into USA.
Dang that must be some nice punanny
@@MillenialDreams He was looking for trouble. He was always wearing boxers only, even outside his wife's house, and on the streets. He was doing flirty and sexist videos with a Muslim teenage girl and posted them on TikTok. Aren't you aware Muslims wear very conservatively? The shorts for men should always extend way below the knees, they should always wear head dresses, etc. I am sure he was warned multiple times about his behavior and dressing but he kept ignoring them.
No matter which country you visit, always be respectful and kind. Also, listen to the locals and always be on alert. 🙏🙏
appreciate your video, i just came back from IloIlo. (Oct 5-19. 3rd time in PH ) and I was listening to a foreign couple ( not from US ) having a conversation with the bar hotel staff about former president Duerte. I told my fiance who is Filipino, lets get away from this conversation, and we got up and moved far away to another area in the resort. I will never ever talk about politics in a country where I'm staying. i learned that lesson years back when I used to visit the Dominican Republic. Its none of my business and I stay clear from it always. I still plan to retire in PH because my experiences have been wonderful. i know where to go and where not to go, what to say and what not to say. its been going great for me.
@madrical777: Good advice to anyone in another country whether you live there or are a tourist. Not your country, not you politics, not your business. Stay out of it!
Actually non-citizens talking about filipino politics is a crime just like US. It is interference of sovereign country's politics. In US they don't enforce it.
I hope you are not going away from the saviour, Bible like that just saying. I understand what you are saying 😊
You give great advice.
@madtical777 very smart. I don't discuss political issues here 🇺🇸🇵🇭 either although I have a lot of opinions about it but I keep them to myself
In addition to being a guilt based culture, never underestimate the role that envy plays in the Philippines.
100%
I had one expat that built a very large two story home with a pool tell me that he went into that knowing he would have to build the walls higher than normal around it, literally and figuratively. You want to block what you built and what you have from as many eyes as possible if you're a Westerner looking to have a Western style of comfort and not wanting to live more simply. And that goes for workers you hire and even extended family members. That last group maybe even more than anything. But it was his wife that helped him understand that in the beginning. The woman you marry is one of the most important decisions you will ever make. Choose wisely. Take your time even if you feel time is running out. It might not end up happening but that's better than marrying a bad woman.
Envy hmmm
Yes before I married my ,, GURL,, she had 10+ close friends in her group
Now 2 ..and there jealous as ,,f,, .. because she now has everything .. house farm.overses travel cars new motor bike..I also pay her ,,mum only,, medical expenses..
@@Jimmy-mx4cc Just having a foreign boyfriend is enough even if she gets nothing much. The filipinos turn against eachother way more than they do against foreigner in my opinion
ENVY plays all over the world. You singleing Philippines 🇵🇭 as one is very UNFAIR & rude!! If you feel like that in MY country, you are free to leave anytime!😠
You make an important point. I have seen and heard many complaints from other Americans about life abroad. Many of them seem never to have visited anywhere else, just a straight shot from Kentucky to the Philippines, or something similar. Developing your travel portfolio really helps you put things in perspective. Congrats on the anniversary, btw. :)
Using Kentucky isn't quite fair. It's a different world and life for most folks there. The larger cities don't count and are definitely not representative of the rural folks across the State. Maybe half the population of each of the 120 counties, have never even see the next county over. Then some have traveled extensively and have just found their spot to call it a day in a beautiful hardwood forest! 😉
@ Yeah, just picked KY out of a hat. Could really be Brooklyn NY lol. Point taken :)
I have found the expats who travelled the world have the least problems adapting here
Yeah that’s true 😮
He's absolutely right. Be humble, kind, patient, keep your mouth shut, do your research before traveling, and pay attention.
This is 100% what everyone needs to hear. I left the US to live in Eastern Europe, And then Asia. it doesn't matter where you are in the world. As Americans we are too care free, open, personal. And too many Americans want to "brag" I lived in a Eastern European country that Americans have been deleted in, because they bragged about money, status, made fun of locals choice in clothes, and the food they eat. Americans watch too many bloggers talk about how amazing things are and never talk about the realities you face in these countries.
Americans are anamolies in Europe especially Eastern Europe. They don't understand that bragging and forcing your existence on others is not considered positive outside of the U.S.
Thank you for this...and next time those people bragging about being expats and how wonderful their new nation is and how bad so many things in the US are, when they get kidnapped, don't expect US taxes to be spent for the CIA, FBI, and Special Forces to look for and rescue you. Personally, I love losing these people with no loyalty or patriotism to the US, because when the next great war starts that the world, once again, expects the US to save them from as evil countries like China, Russia, NK, and the Middle East try to collectively dominate, I'd rather they incompetent brainwashed, disloyal US citizens to already have self-selected out and moved. But, as usual, I'm sure they will all start crying and begging for the US to save them. Good comments; thanks. (I will add that the only main issue your succinct post didn't touch on is how a majority of foreigners come to the US and feel entitled, get free services, and yet don't show US citizens or our nation respect or try to assimilate into our culture. This is also a reality that most won't address for fear of being called xenophobic, racist, and other derogatory terms.)
Yes very well said, People’s are saying he’s a loan shark in that Parts of The southern, That Even Filipinos Afraid to go … And I watch one of his Videos… Titled Living in a Dangerous parts of the Philippines as American and he’s bragging… But he’s just a kid just ignore the warning, I hope they bring him back safe …. 🙏🙏🙏
Yes, I've seen quite a few Americans here brag and get themselves into strife. They don't seem to be able to read the situation and shut up. But then British, Australian and Europeans sometimes act the same way too
@@rogerwilco4736 I love how you exclude the British from "Europeans" lol
What you said about people being so interconnected is SO true. It is not to your benefit to humiliate anyone as you never know the family, relatives or connections you have offended. I keep my opinions solely to my wife, not even to her family to ensure everyone saves face.. I have learned to always leave an Asian the opportunity to save face which carried into my life here in the states, too..
Well said, Tim. What I have noticed in most Asian countries I have been to is if you show people respect and appreciate their culture, they will normally show you the same respect. Laugh with them and they laugh with you. What you have said is great advice for people who haven't travelled enough and spent real time in these proud countries.
That's very much true in any country and place, not just in Asia. Know the culture of the country and respect it, and people will also respect you. Of course be cautious as well. The Philippines in general is safe but there are areas where you really have to be aware of the environment.
Wasnt he found dead of just not confirmed?
@@jodav4631 not confirmed
@@Milliardo5what you mean in General is Safe, Obviously not Safe…
@@jimbo8888 disagree totaly they friendly about small nonsence but if u get screwed by one or group not them that they know at best they stay out of it. They are never yiur friends to trust and count on. Aka experience in panama. Essentially you are only good for taking from not giving to.
My filopina's wife's brother overtook another Filipino near our house. They were both on motor bikes. My wife was sat on a hillside a little further up the road. She was using her laptop and trying to get a better signal to do some school work being a teacher during lockdown. The Filipino took offence at being overtaken by her brother, stopped his bike next to them, proceeded to take out a handgun, and held it against my wife's head. She then pleaded with him not to shoot and apologised for her brother overtaking him. He then put away the gun and carried on his way. Early next morning, my wife's mother waited at the roadside for him to appear, standing in the middle of the road she forced him to stop and gave him a piece of her mind threatening to report him to the police. It turned out that his brother was a local police officer and the gun belonged to him. Anyway, the gunmen started crying and was full of remorse, so the matter went no further. For me, living in the west at the time. I felt she should have had him arrested for what is in the west, a very serious crime. But here in the Philippines, they certainly do things differently. I don't think I'll ever understand the culture here, but thank God for my wife having a very brave mother
Hi Kelvin, as a Filipino American let me explain this to you; Your mother in law as an elder holds a ranking respect status. Even though what happened to you guys on that night was serious, in the Philippines if an issue no matter how serious it might be as long as you didn't killed or you or someone got killed can always be talked it out. For us, there's always solution to an issue, police, barangay officials are the last resort. But, don't mistaken that as a sign that you can just disrespect someone just then and there. I know here in the United States we always have common courtesy and respect but to me thats o ly superficial. Respect in the Philippines is more complicated and deep all the way through your soul.
It's hard to understand stupid 🤣 added with corruption
@@entertexthere1127 like the respect of threatening to shoot someone for being overtaken, lol. Just say it is a culture where little feelings are hurt way to fast, lol
100 % agree! Why is it unreasonable then to hold "visitors" in America to respect our cultural standards?
The older I get the thing I know is that I don't know anything especially here in the Philippines 🇵🇭🇺🇸. Been here since 2019 and still learning new things every day but that's part of the adventure of being here
This is some of the best information you'll get on living in the Philippines. I too live in the province. No matter how frustrated I may get I never forget that I'm a visitor in someone else's home.
I've lived here in Cebu for 12 1/2 years and nothing suprises me anymore but I have never gotten into any disputes. I've learned bisaya and just made my own path. I've never got into a physical face to face dispute with anyone. Anything that happens or if I want to complain I just directly go to the barangay Kaptain and or video it. Seven years in the city and the rest in the province. Foreigners will always be second rate in the Philippines. One thing I've learned though that people never do anything unless you offend them. Different islands treat people differently. Cebu, Negros Occ, Iloilo, Leyte, and Samar are all different.
Exactly! To Be Aware is to Be Alive, and mind your own business!
they are all the same bisaya😂
I am still learning tagalog
Haven't started on the other dialects yet
Girlfriend is in Lapa Lapa Cebu
Islands tend to be like that. I've been told that about the windward islands in the Caribbean, some islands are dangerous others very welcoming... Being Venezuelan gives me the possibility to describe this in a more vivid way.
I once heard that there are so many different dialects (over 80) that you have to be c artful what you say because a word in one area might mean something negative in another area In other words, people are touchy and will take offense easily
I am Christian in a Muslim area. One rule we don't forget is not to marry a muslim girl if you don't convert to Islam. It can end very badly for you. It happens all the time even for Filipino christians.
What a beautiful faith that is.
@@andrevdende8244it is a beautiful faith. Most of us will not compromise our beliefs. As a Vietnamese Muslim I am proud of our traditions that unite Muslims worldwide.
@@difencrosby no its not, its like letting predators roam your neighborhood
Why are you even in Muslim area bro. Elliot converted to Islam, look what still happened to him...
It’s a great way to make those who don’t follow your religion submit, imagine not being Muslim living there, all the women can be taken by Muslim men but you can’t have any since you’re not part of the club
I came to the Philippines first in 1999. Your assertion that NOT loosing face is spot on. Understanding this well is critical.
Many Americans seem to think the world is their Disney. Even still, many get away with pure idiocy, but sometimes, they do not.
and when it doesn't work out, it may involve legal problems, visa problems, jail, deportation.
Unless of course, you just get beaten up by a mob. One pissed off person will often attract a crowd really fast, especially if a foreigner is involved. Even if he wasn't trying to do that to you... it will just happen. And you get to pay the hospital bill, what a winner...... too bad, never mind.
As a U.S. foreigner living in Indonesia...great content.... key words Be humble!!
The Philippines is very simple. When it comes to living as a foreigner in the provinces, you'll get all the love and respect from everyone just as long as you are respectful, polite, and keep yourself out of the drama that you'll find simmering all around you. Put your wife and her family in front of you and let them be your shield from any drama that tries to find its way to you.
This is an outstanding video, and I think one of the best you have ever made. Calm and to the point with valuable information.
Thank you sir
Outstanding analysis Tim, really enjoy the past few videos and the topics you are exploring.
Thanks, I appreciate it. Took a risk to talk about this stuff and it seems to be paying off.
My Grandpa was a merchant marine, traveled all around the world his whole career, one piece of advice he gave me that came to mind when hearing about this was "Never flash a wad" Meaning don't ever flaunt money in front of people, especially cash.
Spouting whales get harpooned.
@jfet6705, that's commonsense even in your own country
@@mtuk4538 Indeed
And some sailors told me that in every place, where there's poverty, there is always a pussy.
keep it hidden in separate little 'stashes' all over your body or clothing. So that only a little is bought out or shown at any one time. You go to a bar, only the next note value up from the price of a drink is offered.... maybe you have two notes of that value.... ok, but you should be OK with that. Then you have some more money somewhere else, for later. That sort of thing works.
Well said Tim, I live in Mexico (I'm white and my wife is Mexican). I need to remind myself often that I am a guest in their country and always will be.
So never stay in the same place for too long. 2 years max. Rent instead of buying. Because when you rent, you are flexible to go or stay. As soon as they know you and they just think what you are. Then it stays that way in their heads. (Rich, poor, bluff, weak, crazy etc)
As an american in taiwan I agree with you about never going to be asian . I've been here for 15yrs now and I still feel like a foreigner and people treat me as such . It's ok though because I'm more comfortable being on my own anyways. But yeah that's something foreigners need to know .
When filipinos can speak with you fluently in their local dialect, you are as close as you can get to becoming unnoticed as a foreigner. My brother in law speaks tagalog fluently and for the most part, we always forget he is a Republican.
@rl8571 you can be close to them , I have many close friends here but the cultural perspective gap is MASSIVE.
And yet, the expect the protection of the US. Are they enjoying the constant, increasing encroachments in the South China Sea, the manmade islands they turn into military outposts, and the recent blockade/quarantine by the Chinese navy?! Maybe we should just let them try to did their pompous ass out of this one...and we all KNOW where THAT would end up.
Do people really think they will ever be seen as the same? I had an uncle from India that passed away recently and he never felt truly American. He would watch Jerry Springer to laugh at the Caucasians and feel better about not being a White Anglo Saxon Protestant (WASP) that founded the nation. If you're a European-American and you live in SE Asia be happy to be to be yourself. It comes with benefits in most countries and really no unique drawbacks aside from everyone will think you're rich. Maybe you are, maybe you are not. You can set those boundaries early on. Don't go to the Rolex store and then walk around with the bag in public view unless you're staying in BGC. Even then it's probably a dickhead move.
I've been here for the same amount of time (Tainan). We'll always be 外國人😅
My dear, I'm so lucky to bump into your video tonight. As of today, you have become my second sociology professor. All along, I don't know the world is divided into two,
The east, which is the world of shame, causing the victim to retaliate and then
West, which is the world of guilt, causing Justice to get involved.
Wow, this has become an eye-opener for me.....
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TIM AND CHRISSY! I attended your wedding via UA-cam. I married a Filipina co-worker here in the US, the OC Timoy. She grew up in Tacloban. The stories she told me about her father getting drunk and challenging everyone to a fight were disturbing. Because he caused a neighbor to 'lose face' they had to move several time to different areas to avoid the harassment. So it is cultural. Foreigner or not mind your own business. Be respectful, we are just visiting. The Filipino Americans are very respectful, honest, hard working and they mind their own business. Thanks for your thoughts Tim. Words to live by.
Very sensible and insightful take on this matter. As a Filipino, I say there's so much truth and wisdom in this video.
Tim, your face has really cleared up man! I admit to not having seen you in a while. You look great! Looks like you've been eating well and taking good care of yourself.
It comes and goes based on time in the gym
Tim i watched id say 98 percent of your videos and being in my late 60s and lived on and off in the Philippines since 1981 and marrying a Filipino l must say l admire you especially hearing your admissions on your findings and your wrongs and to me that makes a better man and person of you, thanks Tim for your thoughts and findings and best wishes for the future and also your beautiful wife, take care 🙏
Thanks my man. Glad you are faithful to the YT cause. People like you keep me going and allow me to do this. Much thanks your way as well.
Wise words Tim K. I have been travelling and visiting the Phillipines since 1996. Such a beautiful place and wonderfull people. Pack mentality is the way. I have seen it over and over. Piss off the wrong people and your paradise will turn into a hell. Don't try to change it, just enjoy the hospitality and be respectfull. Your experience will always be positive.
There is a river near where I live, and about a mile southeast from a local bridge is the hunting ground for a bevy of otters. I go there throughout the season and lie silently and watch that family get on with their busy lives. I've seen three generations of whelps bless that riverbank. So be damned with people and their sensitivity based on supposed moral superiority and childish fears. They can keep their "beautiful" countries and all their oppressive oddities. I will go visit my otter romp any day over their country of confused "-isms".
I'm ashamed of my guilt.
lol
I'm ashamed of my small cock.
You should be. 😅
He has been warned and due to his arrogance and ignorance of the local culture still persisted in living and even marrying a Muslim woman without considering their religious norms!
It is difficult to be have any sympathy for this person.
Losing face is dangerous you're right. In Thailand, I meet a nice 'Lady'. We got along well. While having coffee, she told me she was actually a Ladyboy. I didn't get angry. I reacted honestly and kindly. I apologized several times explaining I wasn't interested. I tried to be very empathic and understand him. He reacted by saying, 'You are a kind man.' We had another coffee enjoying conversation together. We parted ways on a positive note. What could have a disaster with another man turned into a positive experience.
A similar thing happened to me over there. I made the choice to see what it would be like and my butt was sore for weeks bro. Definitely saved a lot of trouble though by saying yes.
Some thai ladyboys are honest
When you're traveling NEVER presume. However familiar the country may feel to you it is not your country. Remember that you are a guest in their country.
Well said, Tim. Thanks for sharing some much needed truths.
I’m Filipino with a fil-Am mother and Filipino-chinese dad. I totally agree with 95% of what you shared in this video and I appreciate how you approach the subject. I think that your experience applies mostly to living in the countryside aka “province.” This is why I always tell any foreign friend to stick to the cities and urban areas for safety and to minimize the cultural difference. I think that you and your wife are very fortunate that you are willing to adapt to the local lifestyle and culture but not all foreigners are like you. With that said, thank you again for sharing your thoughts and analysis in the video. I wish more expats get to watch this before moving to the Philippines. God bless
The good outweighs the bad I agree remain humble enjoy yourself while being vigilant.
This is ridiculous. While the US has its share of problems, including crime, nowhere do you constantly hear it said to "always be vigilant" to people traveling in, immigrating to, or born in the US. You also don't hear these constant warnings about the UK, Canada, Australia, Scandinavia, and a lot of Europe...but we sure do about a lot of Latin America, Mexico, the Middle East, the PI, and much of the rest of Asia. One should always have situational awareness, but the very fact that you and so many other PI expats and expats (and merely travelers) in certain other countries feel the need to constantly express this speaks volumes about what crappy countries they are an a fundamental difference between them and decent, developed, western nations. And, too bad that same humble advice isn't shared by most immigrants TO those developed, western nations.
@@Theodicy101No it's because far too many westerners have an attitude so it's best to warn others to be careful. I lived in several very safe East Asian countries, but you still should be humble and respectful as a guest.
Hi Tim , I was previous viewer of your channel and at first I didn’t like you I won’t mention why but life has humbled me and I appreciate your channel and things you speak about Eliot . I have subbed.
please, speak your mind. and welcome back.
Excellent video Tim, so many truths in it, learned the hard way.
So true, showing respect in the philippines goes a hell of a long way, whether you are talking to some big shot or a local farmer, respect and humility goes further than any amount of money.
If you plan to live in a different culture, then take time to learn that culture, and especially learn what not to do in that culture. You are not entitled to be there. Good Job Tim K!
Yup. I lived in Batangas for 2 years with my wife and her clan. Courtesy, politeness, and respect for others kept me out of any conflict.
Does that also apply to the millions of foreigners in the US--a ton illegally--who commit crimes, get free money, services, food, lodging, and other benefits, while not trying to assimilate and act entitled...not to mention harming our nation and showing no loyalty...but only trying to change it to the lousy country from which many of them came?!
wait, we are not entitled to be in a different country that WE PAID to be in? so whos money is it then that paid for our stay, food ,etc? ill wait.
Tell that to the millions of illegals coming into the US and Europe unwanted and demand that you adjust to them and give them everything they want.
Thank you for that. A lesson for many to learn. I have been married into a Filipino family since 2010. Never a truer word said and very measured. Still recently retired from the uk and living with my middle daughter and here husband and my grandchildren. Although my wife passed away 2022. I could not be happier, expecting when my other two daughers are home and maybe my kids from UK are over. (Stepdaughters)
That’s the best breakdown so far now it’s beginning to make sense
I've been married to a filipina for over 38 years, built a home in Samar, traveled a lot, and have spent over 8 years living in the Philippines. I learned a long time ago that when you think you have things figured out, you absolutely don't (though, I can cook a pot of rice as fast as anyone). I know what you should and shouldn't do and I'm still learning. Tim is right, the cultural intricacies run very deep here and can get you in trouble faster than the speed of love in hooker town. 🌴😎
Thanks for giving me a new perspective about the guilt and shame culture! Couples of months ago I started posting clips in facebook of drivers with no regard to others' safety. Like those who still keep going to my lane despite of flashing my headlight and honking and other traffic violations. I thought it will work coz youtubers posting these kind of content in the west are even being supported by a lot of followers. But here in the Philippines, people hated me. They hate that I am not letting other drivers get away of wrong behaviors they've presented on the public road. Now, these views helped me as well as a Filipino.
Not all cultures are equal and not all religions are compatible.
Hi Tim, you have a lot of wisdom from your life experiences. Thanks for sharing your view point again and may it go to all those who need to see it.
Great breakdown Tim. Spot on.
Great advice! Show respect and be humble. You are a guest in their country. And don't get hammered and shoot your mouth off!! Always be aware.
I noticed stand up comedians don't exist in the "shame" countries. You can't make fun of people in public as we do in the USA.
interesting take
It's not nearly as common, but they do exist. My wife is Thai and enjoys listening to some Thai comedians on occasion. The humor is much different, though, as you noted. They're not poking fun at people individually.
Very interesting observation.
@anthonyantoine9232: Anthony, having lived in both Thailand and the PI they are two different worlds apart.
In Thailand you can get public workers motivated in their office by getting real excited to the point the headman comes out and probably says "do whatever needs to be done because I don't want him back in here". That's after pursuing the regular routes with no success.
Try that in the PI once and the guy riding on a pillion will put one in you. The locals I can get along with. The expat crowd not anymore. And BTW, I don't live in the PI anymore and haven't since 2013 but I still live in SEA but stay away from expats. I did hear about that guy down in Zamboanga. Not very smart and the people that get on utube and tell the world how safe it is there should have their necks rung. I did live in Davao city for three years and yep, safe during the day!
23 years and four countries and everyone is different. Also, things like the expat crowd aren't the same as they were in the early-mid 2000s. People used to be that they understood you were over here because you disliked your country too for the most part. Now they dislike you because of where you came from and they know right away from your accent. Trust me.
Not really true because I am from Poland and we have tons of comedians taking the piss of ourselves as the nation but British humour I think is the best in the world ever hehehehe 😅😅😅😅
"Walk very humbly as you go through life". Very good advice.
Hey Tim, good feedback! My Filipina wife and I have been married for over 28 years. She is from Naval, Biliran Province. Located on the very northern tip of Leyte. Complicated is an understatement. One of her high school classmates is an attorney in town and she has become very corrupt and seems to find more time working on her Facebook page than on her caseload. She is always posturing on facebook on how important she is and is sure to let everyone know when she travels to Europe on vacation. Imagine that, going on vacation to Europe as a small town provincial prosecuting attorney! Anyway, a few weeks ago while having my usual "night cap" before bed, I see one of her postings and I make an editorial comment(honestly cannot remember what it was), and by the time I wake up the next morning, she is over to my mother in laws house threatening charging me with cyber bullying! Honestly, am really not that type of person, but I think she was publicly convicted by my comments and embarrassed with her large following. Something like that happens here, we blow it off and move on, especially if there are elements of truth to it. BUT, like you stated, it does not work that way in the Philippines. Anyway, the politics, complications, noise level at night, lack of infrastructure, pollution, etc has relegated our max future visits to perhaps 3 months/year and possibly less. We just recently came back from a 6 week stay and I look at the Philippines as more of an activity stay(scuba, sightseeing) now rather than considering it as a retirement destination. I think my Filipina wife is happy to stay away from the Philippines as it was noisy as hell during the night and the both of us got little sleep from all of the inconsiderate neighbors. Anyway, certainly not has nice as it was 30 years ago and I agree that going to those areas less travelled are the way to go. As ex-military, I also am extremely cautious to not advertise my presence and stay as low key as possible while there. Our itinerary is not even shared with our local family. We trust no one.
Very wise words, my man. I'm 67 and have been in Davao since June of 2024, I've come to the conclusion that I'll always be on the outside looking in. Hell, even in my home around the dinner table, I feel alienated because everyone will slip into their native language. Never once thinking of me sitting right there in front of them. And that's just one of many situations I experience daily. I try to be humble ( quite ) most of the time, but there are days when I want to scream at people. I've been blatantly cheated, lied to, and ignored. It's my opinion that there are a lot of passive-aggressive people here, and that's probably because of the shaming culture. Confrontation isn't a thing here, regardless of who is in the right or wrong. Forgive and forget, or just live with it.
Tim, the point about walking humbly is a good idea in any situation, caring about others, caring about animals and the world/environment. I also think it's great to explore one's own country and outside of it, but you also bring up an interesting comparison about cultural differences and how welcoming or not they are. To me, it's long been obvious that "strength in diversity" is one of the biggest socio-political lies ever told, and the rising diversity and declining native culture and civilization in the US, Scandinavia, Canada, Australia, and a lot of Europe is proof. Hungary finally figured it out and is finally contructing better border control and kicking out a lot of the ones they let in in the past few years...ones, like in the US and other countries I just mentioned, that have a vastly different religion and culture, and who not only DON'T want to conform TO the new culture but actually want it to conform to THEM and try to actively, even through bullying and terrorism to change it. Diversity works ONLY if the immigrants are very similar with their original culture to the country to which they are immigrating AND where they actually care about becoming a full part of that new country...e.g., Canadians moving to the US, Americans moving to the UK or Scandinavia, Aussies moving to a lot of Europe, etc.. In the US--and with many other "woke"/socialist/marxist-leaning governments, that has gone on increasingly over the past few decades--and which has reached a breaking point under the horrible "leadership" of Biden-Harris, has been to allow floods of immensely different cultures into our country, causing immensely more negatives than any possible positives...people who want to change the US into the very (to quote Trump, and it's true) "S**THOLE" countries from which they've come, to take full advantage of the US and its citizens while giving nothing in return, not being grateful, and not being loyal to their new country.
While common courtesy and respect are important, it's important for a lot of these other nations, including a lot of developed "western"-type nations is that because of brave service men and women like you, Tim (Thank you again for your service!), and other citizens who sacrifice in many ways, we've saved the world's ass in two world wars (including the PI which would now be speaking Japanese if not for the US), and have overly funded NATO, the UN, and all sorts of humanitarian relief around the globe. I'm sick of the disrespect to the US--my nation which has its problems for sure, but which I love and of which I'm proud--and I think it's time to start excluding people, kicking many out, and kicking ass again and taking names around the world...and we should demand loyalty and for all allies to do their fair part...and we need to quit being so kind when we are the victors--especially when someone else starts problems (and also act when countries indirectly and cowardly cause problems but smile to our face--a great example being the Saudis). In the future, when we win a war, we should have a new US territory. Finally, who is the PI going to rely on when China gets even MORE aggressive in the South China Sea and Philippine territorial waters...and they WILL soon, as is obvious from their recent act of war against Taiwan, the increasing interference (including boat rammings) against the PI, BRICS, and many other things in their master plan of world domination. Decades ago, Americans were respected because the US was respected and feared, and it was generally safe to go almost anywhere. Today is a polar extreme in the way Americans are viewed and treated. The US needs to start drastically changing that, no matter how harsh they have to get.
Nearly everything you are saying in this video I can compare quite easily to here in Thailand. Thanks for spelling it out, even after nearly 25 years in this beautiful country I am still learning.
Former Philippines resident here. Things that can get you and your family k*lled in the Philippines:
Staring at someone in the street or mall.
Pointing your finger at someone or wagging your finger at someone to "come here".
Insulting the Philippines country, culture or people.
Embarrassing someone or acting aggressive to someone in public. This can be deadly.
I have seen the reactions to foreigners doing the above things and it resulted in people dying.
Remember, Filipino's are VERY sensitive to what you say to them, but not sensitive about what they say to you. Filipino's are not good at controlling their emotions as emotions are kept under control at home and they have very little experience handling emotional situations.
Well said, and yet another great reason why it's just better to avoid the PI and nations like it. A LOT more negatives than positives. And maybe, the next time a Filipino expects respect, including what is said to them and how it's said...but not showing the same courtesy in return, maybe they should remember who saved their ass in WWII from the Japanese, and where the PI will again beg assistance from the US when their problems with China get worse...as they will soon, it's obvious to anyone closely watching world events. Just ask Taiwan, Tibet, Nepal, and fishermen in the South China Sea!
This is way over exaggerated,most Filipinos couldn’t and wouldn’t hurt a fly.. i was in cebu city for many months and there were days I had to tell 3 guys to F-off because of their scammy ways or how they treated others in public. Cebu city is pretty hectic…everyone’s in a hurry,the people driving are terrible drivers,so inconsiderate… here in Canada we also have people who lose face sooo easily… we call them insecure baby boys… I felt good some days standing up for people being bullied by Filipino men or the never ending petty scams…but most days it drains the life out of you… so I went to a smaller city and problem solved haha
I highly doubt you seen anybody killed,ever…neat story though.
So in other words, they are herd animals.
Philippines is the armpit of Asia.
The armpit of asia
thanks for your video. I came for dental work right after covid, ended up meeting my now wife after mourning 2 years after losing my childhood sweatheard and the begining of covid. Now while waiting for her visa to come i come twice a year to the philipinnes, her family is in Negros but we rent an apartment in manila. definetly a lot to leatn despite like you i traveled extensively, 87 countries so far, and i thank you for sharing as it truly helps to lower the learning curve. Heard a food saying "the smart man learns from his mistakes, the wise man learns from others". wish and praying the best for you.
Respect and humbleness…. Arrogance and disrespect will get anybody in trouble especially if you are an expat acting like you didn’t know(tanga/stupid). Good information Mr. Tim.😊🇺🇸🇵🇭
My parents are from a shame culture and I was raised in the US, but my family culture overtook the US culture especially as their only daughter. Needless to say, it wasn't easy living in two worlds simultaneously. Now that im older, I have a bigger appreciation for how i was raised. Thanks for the map!
I lived 8 months in the Philippines and I can't see any reason I would go back at this point. As a foreigner living in a small town there would be nuts, to much BS. Pros are beautiful women and lower cost of living but the fact you will never fit in and alone seen as an ATM by most people sucks.
I fully agree! I spent 8 months there also until covid...I was threatened a few times and felt the dark side of it all. I'm staying in America. 👍🎅🇺🇲
My uncle got killed in COVID times.so sad
Nicely summarized.
You are living in the wrong place in the Philippines. Live in the big cities. No one will bother you. Live in bgc.
I am a Filipino. He stayed in the wrong place where life is hard. He should have stayed in Subic or anywhere in Zambales where most Americans are staying and retires. Based on his video, he seems loud.
I’m glad to see that it looks like life is getting sorted out for you.
A really good and interesting video! I've been following you since the beginning. Great work!
Thank you for your loyalty.
What a great, enlightening video. I'm impressed!
thank you sir.
I'm married to a Filipina for 11 years and what this guy says above in 100% true. Please take his advice and never be cocky in anyway in the Philippines
Good advice bruh. It's best to avoid trouble and maintain a low profile 👍
I've watched your videos basically on and off for years, most just you and Chrissy's regular life, especially liked the videos where you taught about the reality of living in phillipines as expat like COL and laws. Just wanted to say, really great video man. My favorite of yours probably.
Just to clarify, a caucasian looking guy with blue eyes can be treated as a local filipino as long as he is fluent of the language. Chances are, this blue eyed caucasian is really a filipino. He is a local filipino and he considers himself a local filipino. I can see them in supermarkets. They look very much caucasian but they speak tagalog like the locals because they are locals.
So, a caucasian guy can be treated as a local filipino as long as he speaks the language like the locals and he considers himself a local. If you think you are an expat, then don't dream to be treated like a local by the locals. You don't even consider yourself a local.
Thank you, Tim, for sharing your personal life experiences in the Philippines!! Love your videos!
Wise words from a wise man
My dad told me im in my 40s now.... i finally have some perspective :)
Great advice. Respect for others, their beliefs and their cultures is extremely important. I'm a retired veteran and I have done tours of duty in many countries.
If you are new to globe trotting, start by visiting more cosmopolitan cities where foreigners are not so unusual. Also a country that has a majority Caucasian population is a safe bet, although you can still get into very sticky situations if you are not careful.
Finally, do as much diligent research about the people, the culture, the beliefs and the customs of the country you are planning to visit.
Take into account how the locals percieve people like yourself. As many people who are keeping themselves updated on world affairs, a certain "content" creator has made South Korea a less than hospitable place for black people to visit.
Too often it is foreigners that behave badly that cultivates hostility from locals. Make no mistake, in some countries you can get killed for something you did out of ignorance. Never forget, you are a guest in their country.
And that's exactly right. Take for instance when becoming Filipino toured the mosque and telling everyone how safe and kind it is there and that the whole time he has arm guards with him just outside the video frame. I wonder if the Eastman kid watched his videos and listened to becoming Filipino telling him how safe it is
He sure fooled me!! And I thought he was a good honest guy. But it looks like he was working overtime as ambassador for that region!! I am beginning to find out a lot of YTers are not who they are!
Ps...good point: what if Elliott watched his videos and saw how great it was in that region!!
Becoming Filipino did emphasize the need to coordinate with the local tourism office. There are parts of the Philippines that are still tribal/medieval where the overlords must be paid their dues for safe passage.
@@Dan-q6v1vYes so true especially the Filipinas vloggers selling themselves to their subscribers.
I think we’re missing the part where we ask the question, what could have Mr. Eastman done that caused this unfortunate thing happened to him? I know this sounded as victim blaming, but I think it’s a valid question, no?
You can go safely anywhere in the Philippines if you are friendly.But if you are supremacist will bring you risk and threat of danger.
Well said I am a Filipino but I prepare not to argue but instead step backward to avoid grudges and hatred which we do not know what a head on the streets is, it can kill you
Mahalo. I went to Pi a few years ago to surf and dive. Love the country as I grew up with many Filipina kids here in Hawaii, so the culture was familiar and comfortable. I would like to retire in the country. Thanks for your videos
Well i am a Veteran traveller to Phils. Was there 2 times in 2015 and in 2017 and in 2019 and in 2022 and now i go there again in 2024 in less than 14 days. Stay there 5 months.Got my own place to live in Phils allready. So stay safe and be humble and show respect to people in you area and they threat you well. Do not show off your money all time. Not a good idea. Just be nice to local people and they are nice back to you. I know people in my local area allready so i never cause any trouble in my neighbourhood. Then you can have a good life. Just play your cards right and you can have a safe life in phils.
I've lived in Cebu City since 2015...my asawa is from Cebu and i have nothing but good times here...m an american...thee politics of thee Philippines is none of my concern...i do not talk local or country politics...Nice country 2 live in...
Wow. Great message. Very insightful. I think what you said also applies to the local communities in Western towns and cities. They are very integrated. Often times I've heard that people back in the home town village know just as much as the local community. Not that surprising I guess but there are no secrets and the consequences are drastic and effect the whole family for shameful behaviour. I briefly dated a Vietnamese young lady and did not have a clue of the complexities of what I was getting involved in.
Your take on this is interesting. I've never heard of the culture divide by motivation/driving force (Guilt-shame-fear spectrum of cultures). Thanks for this informative video :)
Losing face is the first rule of SEA club, life is dirt cheap in the PH
As cheap as $100
HOW ABOUT YOUR COUNTRY
@@pickledbeaker5916 you can't live in asian if you say that here your life is in danger here
@@alvinchan8499cheaper!
Understanding the fundamental nature of respect is crucial to grasping the nuances of cultural dichotomy. Historically, the belief in cultural superiority has often precipitated devastating conflicts and loss of life. This is equally applicable on a personal scale, especially when one enters another's domain and disdainfully belittles it.
Tim, this is one of the most interesting and informing video I have ever watched relating to expat living. Thank you.
Thank you my friend. I appreciate the kind feedback.
Tim, I’ve recently discovered your channel and am enjoying it very much, working sort of backwards. I’m in an LDR for 3 months now, planning to visit in May. She’s in the province, about 1.5 hrs. from Iloilo City. She’s Illonga. Do you have an opinion about Iloilo and the island of Panay in general? Thanks so much. Chris, 59.
I was disrespected many many times and when I say something i'm the bad guy
Hi Tim, your video was quite informative and interesting and so dead on. Which means you understand our culture quite well, complicatedness & all. It is a beautiful country & we are a good race despite our faults, which can be many...but no other place will teach one to survive a multitude of different scenarios, and to survive well. I hope that you are happy here and that you and your family thrive well and prosper...
thank you very much. very kind words... -tim
I gave a local Bali Grom a loaned board. He stole the fins and returned the board. I shamed him in public, and that’s where it all started….. your right Tim
Growing up in the Shame part of the world saying something about someones mother (especially in public) would lead to a blind rage and someone is getting violently hurt regardless of what your relationship with that person is. Then just specated the other side and how Mom stuff is thrown around casually was mind-blowing to me. Working years in tourism i would caitor to 200-300 people from all over the world every day to the point where i know where you are from before you even speak. I slowly learned that i need to tolerate there understanding of acceptable behavior (for example Turkish people like to snap there fingers at waiters) and this is what Tim is really talking about. You really have to know what is acceptable by being quite and observing every day interactions for quite a while... tourists edge me to getting a conviction daily at work and they don`t even realise it. I try to stay level headed but the shame and honor upbringing is super hardwired.
Be humble and don't drink to excess in public. Alway keep your wits.
In other words, BE 😎 COOL , DONT BE A FOOL
My parents and my older sister coming from germany lived in arab countries all the way trough the 80's. Aside from a cutural difference, there was also the iraq/iran war going on. Coming from germany, they adapted pretty quick and my dad even started to learn the language. One thing, that was basically self explanatory was that you respect their rules, their religion and their way of living. They quickly made friends and respected each other. Obviously there were also negative experiences in the daily life, also because of the war, but no where in the world will you always have peace and sunshine. It shows, that its always important to respect their ways, when you come to a new country. You cant act like a jackass, treat ppl bad around you and then expect them to just take it. Be correct, open minded and show some damn respect. Usually you will be fine.
Great video Tim 📹 your story is a true one. It's a shame that young guy didn't get to see it I'm married have lived in the Philippines 😢in and out over 20yers and still learning cheers take care you and your family Australia 🇦🇺.
in cebu i experienced yanks talking loudly in a fastfood restaurant for everyone to hear. they were complaining about the food, that's it's not up to US standards. it's harrassment but the people just ignored them so i ignored them as well. 😂
Wherever you go be respectful at all times thats one thing and everything will follows❤
A lot of people say the hospitality in the Philippines is the best in the world. I haven't experienced that. It's not a chip my shoulders or expecting the same accommodations as the West...There are differences even in IT Park or BGC...The nicest areas of the Philippines....Some Expats are walking around thinking they are going to get 5 stars vacation for half the price... For me it's about being provided with what was promised, in expensive areas...If you are renting a apartment in a working-class neighborhood curb your expectations. If Wifi and Hot Water is listed, it should work upon arrival...50-100 dollars a night is enough to get a 4-star hotel, 5-star 200-300 dollars. If an Airbnb is charging that in the Philippines...It should smooth check in process and unbroken appliances. You have to wonder do the Hosts care? Not really, they have your money, and they don't. More often than not it seems, normal basic things we expect as guests simply go by the wayside. Waiting 45 minutes to check in at the Security Post because someone forgot to let them know you were coming or cleaning the apartment...Common. Now retail, If you ask for something is in stock, why tell me it's not but help my fiancé later? My patience has been tested and it seems like people feel they can speak to an Expat anyway they choose and not get a negative reaction. I have never yelled at someone or acted aggressive in the Philippines....But people have pushed the limits. The scams are real, the dismissiveness, the seemingly unprepared to handle basic tasks and questions.... Like you told me I can't exit through this door.... Where is the exit at an International Airport. At times it seems like insanity. Even questioning something you are told as being not right.... Is seen as a insult. Been lied to multiple times...
This guy made so many mistakes, it’s clear he had no understanding of the culture he was entering…much less first hand experience. They were never going to accept him as a member of the community.
With over 50 years in Asia, I can confirm all your points. "Face" is the most important thing in the east. You can give face to someone or you can cause them to lose face. Losing face is a powerful motive for revenge. Good job, Tim.
I've been in Vietnam for ten years. That face thing is one of the most annoying things about the culture. Even my Vietnamese wife can't stand it.