Rings of Power Review Episode 5 - This is ABSURD!
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- Опубліковано 22 вер 2022
- Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power episode 5 review breakdown of Amazon Prime Video's tv series where Galadriel convinces Númenor to go to middle earth and fight Sauron. Elrond reveals Mithril to the elves and gets Durin to mine it. Arondir and Bronwyn prepare to defend the elf fortress while the Harfoots return as migrating hobbits. But as Sauron's plan unfolds there is one question, is LOTR: Rings of Power worth watching?
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Rings of Power episode 5 where the episode ends in the same place episode 4 did! Wow what an episode, a whole load of hilarious lines and a fight scene to go down in history lmao. What did you think, let me know your thoughts down below and as always thanks for watching :)
Do you ever watch things you enjoy! I hope so cause I feel sorry for you guys watching this shit you couldn’t pay me enough man
Buh-buh-bye
the florist looks like a w
There are no words in Elvish or the tongues of men for this pure and utter trash
They wanted us to like the not-Hobbits like Druckman wanted us to like Abby.
In the Peter Jackson films, when Boromir is training Merry and Pippin for swordplay, he’s actually trying to help them, rather than mock them and show them who’s boss, as we see Galadriel do in this episode. Before the battle of Helm’s Deep, when the scared boy with his old damaged sword passes by Aragorn, the latter compliments the former’s weapon and tells him not to despair in the face of war, rather than smirk because he is better. And when Eowyn is practicing with her sword, Aragorn commends her skill, rather than .... spank her ass. I don’t have a problem with heroic female characters, on the contrary. But I do have a problem with this damn caricature.
Boromir even slips and pricks Merry's hand and he immediately stops and apologizes
@@silverscorpio24 I love Boromir, just putting it out there.
At least these shows make me appreciate even more what an amazing job Peter Jackson did to stay true to Tolkien's vision, rather than making every single character and race a bastardised version of themselves.
@@tsnophaljakarax9963 boromir is a good guy at heart
He actually walk alone to rivendell
But still, the power of evil got the better of him because he been afraid that mens will fall into darkness soon
The one ring succeed in luring him
@@silverscorpio24 But Boromir is bad because he didn't get promoted for it.
@@dafuqgusdafrey60
The One Ring gets everyone except Tom Bombadill.
They're following five subplots in this episode and the most interesting thing that happens is Durin lies to Elves to steal a new table for his wife.
🤣
Thanks, but I for one will never know. I only come here to find out what sorrows Disparu suffered for our sake.
Oh no , you spoiled the most interesting part for me... thanks for saving me the time to watch this trainwreck.
Was it...a nice table? 🤔
Durin's shenanigans are the only good part of this show
“Don’t fight with your arms, fight with your feet”
Rings of Power writers, watched Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and thought it was a documentary.
I’d give anything to see an appearance by the Knights of Ni demanding a shrubbery It’s so bad they might as well make it into a farce at this point.
lmao
"Fight with your head"
It's funny that the evil elf looks more like a elf than all the others
True
Uber-Elf, it makes about as much sense as everything else here.
Well, with that skin tone he looks more like a Romulan. He took a wrong turn at the studios, he was going to appear in Picard.
Sauron wouldn't destroy the Harfoots, he would take them in his service. They would be his most evil servants and he would call them the Nazfoots.
😂 Nazfoots
Instead of flying mounts he'd cover them with mounds and mounds of dirt, and they'd be happier than they'd ever been before.
@digifalc0087 😂
Mwuhahaha
The witchking is actually 3 harfoots in a trenchcoat
Sauron might not be the hero we want, but he is the hero we need of this tale.
At this point, people are rooting for sauron 😂😅
I am rooting for anyone who puts Galadriel in her place 😂😂
@@dann5480 Than you're rooting for different Elf tribes, because namely they were constantly putting her on various thrones 😩 In the books, I mean. Really, it's time to invent names to distinguish those three Galadriels. Like... Original-Galadriel, Jackson-Galadriel and This-Humanized-Parody
I'm rooting for him at this point. At least then the show will hopefully be interesting.
I hope in the retcon sauron destroys all of arda and puts it out of its misery.
The men on the ship were in awe of Guyladriele's armor because it was actual metal when they are just wearing armor pajamas.
"armor pajamas" lmao
A woman wearing armor…..lmao!!
The Númenorian armor looks so fake and cheap
I really appreciate how the Harfoots are becoming our standard for what is evil. "You're acting like a Harfoot!"
I'm sure we're going to be getting t-shirts & tote bags saying "Don't be a Harfoot" ;)
"Woah, calm down there, Harfoot!" Rolls off the tongue nicely, I like it!
It is gonna go down in history. They are somehow worse than the cannibalistic Halfling tribes in Dark Sun.
I think the writers were simply confused and wrote Galadriel as a millenial after they read she'd lived for a thousand years.
😁
underrated comment of the day
That explains everything! ... And it is actually more true than you might think. In their obsession to 'see themselves' in the story and make sure it 'reflects the modern world' they succeeded in only drawing a picture of themselves.
Nice one!😂
As a millennial, I take offense 😁
I think the only knowledge the "writers" have of Hobbits is from Gollum's "Nasty, filthy hobbitises" line. They are probably proud about nailing that one!
I like to think they only think they're hiding while in reality everyone just avoids them. The hunters in the first episode literally smelled them from a distance. They're just paranoid little dirty people
😂
Now everyone hates them. Well done amazon.
In LoTR, Orlando Bloom was trained by an actual archer for 2 months every day before he was allowed on the set, much less in front of a camera.
In RoP, you can't even get them to hold the string correctly, much less master the arm/shoulder movement(you don't pull the string as much as you push the bow away from you, if that makes sense).
In LoTR, an actual armour smith and his apprentice hammered out 80,000 metal pieces for chainmail. They even tempered some with silver to make the blood stand out more.
In RoP, they went down to Walmart, bought a few long-sleeved t-shirts and spray-painted chainmail patterns on them.
The disgrace!
No, wasn't 80,000. 80,000 is the figure _per shirt_ for the silver-coated plastic mail used in strenuous action scenes. The actual mail, the two armourers spent two years making _12.5 million_ links. If all the links were assembled into a single line it would be seven miles long.
The chemistry between Bronwyn and Lemonlas is explosive - like a bonfire on Mars.
It’s held me enraptured for weeks. I can think of nothing else. My tears stream onto the screen as I write.
They're both activists, how can you get more chemistry than that?!?
I do think Donlemonlas is the best character of them all. Which isn’t saying much.
I think you mean it’s explosive like a barrel of wine.
@@GaudiaCertaminisGaming - As explosive as an inverted jar with no oxygen in it.
@Wayne Daikon - According to Wikipedia the first modern bra was patented in Germany in 1889.
Some lore for you all:
There were three Silmarils crafted to capture the Light from the trees. One fell into a volcano, one got thrown into the sky, and one was dropped to the bottom of the ocean. And mithril was simply a rare and valuable metal that the Dwarves mined, crafted, and sold to other peoples.
This episode legitimately pissed me off.
Thrown into the sky? You mean:
The Valar 'took Vingilot, and hallowed it, and bore it away and ...there it was lifted up even into the oceans of heaven...and Earendil the Mariner sat at the helm, glistening with dust of elven-gems, and the Silmaril was bound upon his brow'.
Also mithril could be found in numenor. So this is the treatment of lore that passes me off, they should not spit on existing lore, ok fine add filler as long as it doesn't contradict established lore.
Also I'm sick of member berries. Lines framing if scenes, sounds its smeared with them but doesn't make me feel family just cringe as the rest of the dialogue is gash and could never imagine it in lotr
Yep! Mithril had magical properties but that was literally it.
This thing with the Silmarils got me so mad.. unbelievable how they re-use the things and still get it wrong.
Trust Rangs of Power to bastardize the lore for absolutely no reason whatsoever! Oh no the Elves are all dying, we must bathe our bodies in mithril to be CURED!! WTF?
I have begun to think that Sauron is not the villain of this story. I'm starting to see Saroun as a misunderstood reformer that's honestly trying to make Middle Earth a better place. The orcs are less harsh to their own kind than the harfoots are. Their dark elf leader is more likeable than Galadriel. So yeah I am rooting for Team Saroun.
maybe that's the idea behind the Rinks of Powder. After all, imagine "Lord of the Rings" if, instead of Frodo writing it, Sauron wrote it. We have denizens of Mordor writing Rinks of Powder, so yeah, everything is going to be inverted.
The villain of the story is the West and the Patriarchy
It's pretty SAD writing when Sauron turns out less evil than Galadriel and the Dirty Harfoots!
Well that's the thing... woke writers identify more with villains then they do with heroes. So they write heroes like villains and in turn make the villains more into the heroes because the "heroes" are more villainous then the villains.
YES
Imagine being an orphan and you have three choices for who you would want
to live with
1) with Galadriel
2) with the harfoots
3) with the orcs
Wow , this is a difficult decision….
I choose the Orcs if meat is back on the menu
It's actually not... orcs!!!! :P
Orcs. No-brainer.
No, not at all. Galadriel every time. Unlesss of course you are talking about galadrrrrrrrriel in which case i'd go with the harfoots. But only because with the harfoots it's the easiest to get away from and try my luck living in the wilderness.
@@tranquilthoughts7233 I would have said I'd jump off the nearest cliff, but I like your plan.
So I’m guessing:
Episode 6:
- Galadriel army sails
- Harfoots walk
- Orc Army gets closer
- Prince Dwarf argues with King Dwarf
Episode 7:
- Galadriel army gets off boats
- Harfoots walk
- Orc Army arrives at Tower
- King Dwarf Dies
Episode 8
- Galadriel army rides horses and sees tower falling (cliff hanger)
- Eminem finds Harfoots (cliff hanger)
- Orc Army about to breach Tower (cliff hanger)
- Deeza Crowned Queen Dwarf
The creeping horror! We're being overrun by snails and sloths!
My friend, if your prediction is accurate, I'll owe you a coke.
@Wayne Daikon LOL
Yep seems about right
@@SuperExtraSheep .... ha........ ha....... ha.
"Our ancestors lived" is literally the definition of an ancestor.
😂
touché ^^
😂
The writers clearly thought that line was so clever 🤣
My ancestors are smiling upon me Imperial, could you say the same?
"I need to go to Middle Earth, it's so important to me!"
"Why?"
"I don't know."
Gripping.
And I'm dead.
Does the Amazon Refund Policy allow the viewer to cancel the series now??
Go Dawgs😇
"You also want to come to Middle Earth with me!"
"No I don't, I like it here!"
"No, you will feel how I tell you to feel!"
"Okay, I guess I can't argue with that."
I do think it's funny how tiny Galadriel is considering she's supposed to be significantly taller than the average male elf and I'm pretty sure male elves on average are at least 6 foot plus.
You are right, Galadriel is supposed to be 6'4'' (193 cm) in the lore, and it was so unusual she had a name that meant ''man maiden'' because of her height. Morfydd Clark is 5'3'' (161 cm) which is even shorter than most actresses. You probably won't find a Cate Blanchett look alike that tall, but they could have done some tricks so she wouldn't be so much shorter than everybody else including the lowly Southlander lol
Elendil is supposed to be 7'11 so...
I thought it was 9'11?
"Everyone who helps the Harfoots is worse than Sauron..." - I laughed so hard I really fell from my seat 🤣🤣🤣
Imagine a blacksmith that doesn’t know how to handle a sword, how would he know balance, handle comfort, weight, blade length and strength. These writers are something indeed
In their brains blacksmiths are just people who heat metal and bash it with a hammer.
You know, dumb men.
Right you are. Clowns
@Anonymous Cheese money laundering. It went to Amazon owned subsidiaries as pass through orgs so the money can just go back to Amazon later
You really missed the point of that scene. He did more than "know balance, handle comfort, ...".
@@joeterzio7175 yeah, he did a little twirl too. A clear sign that he is an expert swordsman.
Sauron: One does not simply walk into the shire. There is evil there that does not rest.
Actually they do rest a lot. But still evil.
Laughed out loud for real xD xD xD
Funnily enough, Sauron's actor played Sean Bean's son in the Medici show. lol.
I also like how they stopped showing the map to switch between scenes, just so people maybe wouldn't notice that Elrond and Durin traveled across an entire continent from Khazad-Dum to Lindon, while in the Southlands only a day has passed.
I'm convinced that Galadriel is the unknowing villain of the story who will be responsible of bringing Sauron back to power. She wants an enemy so badly she ended up creating one, that's the only way I can see this show ending up half way decent- Galadriel's toxic behavior towards others must lead to grave consequences.
You turned out to be right...
Since he's being taught by the evil half-foots... we can only conclude that it is Saruman
He did go on to ensure that Merry and Pippin both did not get left behind or walk alone!
There is no way Saruman in this
Haha good one 😂
he's maybe Balrog..
Nah, he is obviously Gandalf, but they will never call him that for copyright reasons.
The re-writing of the Origination of Mirthril.... the "Extra" Silmarils is appalling.
And Elves need Mirthril to live?? What part of immortal elves does the show not understand?
This is just like a torture room... but the torturer has forgot the safe word.
“We require additional Mithril”
The Elf Elders, probably
XD
There are no extra Simarils. They are making things up, as they went, effing up Tolkien lore left , right and center. Unforgivable.
Hack writers: "Let's just make 1 or 2 more Silmarils so we can have a device to drive our retarded plot with."
These are the script writers that felt the need to write cringeworthy drivel about rocks and boats. Of Course elves need mithril to live. Breathing was invented later when Morgoth hid all the mithril.
Explanation (which is good enough for me): "Just like the Two Trees and the Silmarils, mithril possesses the Light of Valinor, the land where elves can return to live for eternity with the Valar. Mithril is the physical manifestation of the very thing that makes elves ageless and wise. The rotting tree is merely the “outer manifestation of an inner reality” that the light of the elves-the Light of the Valinor-is fading within them.
If they can adorn themselves in mithril they might stem the decay that will soon overtake them. Without that special silver, Gil-galad believes elves’ “immortal souls will diminish into nothing” until they are “but shadows swept away by tides of time, forever.” And he says their demise will happen as soon as spring."
I am in complete sympathy with the villagers that wanted to join the orcs, lol. Go Team Sauron! Also, I think that Bronwyn giving the speech when a military dude is standing right behind her is proof that the showrunners are thinking of Arondir as just a token character. Either that or they didn't think the actor could deliver a rousing speech. He's obviously been struggling with the accent and also has the unelflike tendency to mumble his lines. Re the harfoots, I'm convinced this has all been a plot against Nori's father (maybe because he's perhaps the nicest harfoot, so they think there's something wrong with him). First they didn't help him with his work so that he hurt himself, and now they're wanting to leave him behind.
Here is my theory: Halbrand is Sauron is disguise who accepted his wrong doings as Lieutenant of Morgoth. Because he is banished from Ainur country Valinor, he became human Halbrand to live a peaceful human life in Numenor. After getting to know Guyladriel and suffering a long time under her annoying behavior, he got convinced there is no return. He must destroy middle earth.
Most likely the way they're intending on spinning this.
*NumenoRRR
Fulfilling miriels visions of an elf bringing the end of numenor.
@@Fiercedaddyart, exactly
Or what about… a Halbrand so nuanced it could have gone either way. Keep him in Numenor as a smith. And the fan conversation is, was he honestly trying to do better but slid into a lust for power as his skill is recognized and he rises in influence or was this the plan all along to turn Numenor into one giant forge to launch an massive attack on Middle Earth.
No one is pointing this out but, How the hell did Galadriel get her armor back? She jumps off the elven ship with nothing
Good point 👍
Eh, because of reasons. Obviously.
@@billy-the-butcher Oh thanks for the explanation, man. I love the show now, such a masterpiece
Excellent Point! It ought to be at the bottom of the sea. Such a yawning great continuity error, it beggars belief.
They hired imbeciles to make this because most people haven't woken up to that this show isn't about Lord of the Rings, it is about a tax write off for Bezos.
"They've never fought orcs."
The Numenorians were the people of Edain that the Valar gave the island to as a reward for fighting MORGOTH. They've fought far worse than orcs. And given how rubbery their concept of what year it is in the second age, some of the oldest people on Numenor might even REMEMBER the war. Or if not them, then their parents would have been there, since they live for a few hundred years, and the Numenorians set sail for Middle Earth in 600 SA.
Not only that, but Numenorians on AVERAGE are like 6'4". Even the women. Yet a lot of these are the same height as the woman playing Galadriel, who is 5'3".
Galadriel is meant to be 6’4”
YUP Numenorians are supposed to be the Middle Earth equivalent of the Spartans! But NOPE the show writers have no CLUE and instead establish them as INCOMPETENT fighters who need to be taught by Galadriel that you use the pointy end of a sword to STAB an orc! LMAO
@@veeclash4157
"the pointy end goes into the other guy."
@@artnull13
In the lore, yes. However, we all know how well Amazon is sticking to the lore and canon. It doesn't help that every male in the show is taller than her, too. We'll see what she looks like when she meets up with some non-Numenorian humans, but I have a feeling all the men are going to be taller than her as well.
@@artnull13 I thought she was supposed to be 6'6"?
I for one appreciate Rings of Power. How else would I get to watch Disparu shred it with keen logic and great humor?
How did Isildur go from being given a well-deserved beating in an alleyway to teleporting into the holds of the ship?
The editing is atrocious - they're in the bowels of the ship - zoom out explodes - suddenly pulling themselves up on the docks.
Melodrama IN. EVERY. SINGLE. SCENE. It wears you down and undermines the actual important events. “Hey, want to go to the Hall of Lore?” “Ok.” Cue epic music and slow motion horse galloping. Every single scene has this, there’s no buildup to anything.
It doesn’t feel like a story. It feels like AWS software engineers plugged the LOTR movies and the texts into a machine learning algorithm and this is the output.
it just works
Ha ha, best description of the show so far.
yeah i noticed it too. Melodramatic or epic music is everywhere. Like they could make scene when Galadriel is shitting in privy and I bet you she would do it to the sounds of horns and trumpets
As a ML engineer I'm offended... an AI would do a better job than this
you joke but thats already in the works somewhere.
If the orcs have cloaks that protect them from the sun, why do they need a tunnel?
Because, without spending 3 episodes building tunnels, you'd have just skipped to the part where, somehow, it takes them "days" to walk up a hill. Their army is like 200 hundred. The shit peasents in the tower are like 12.
Because if the orcs wore full body cloaks they'd look a lot like middle eastern people. And we can't have a modern show imply that all middle eastern looking people(orcs) are evil now, can we?
More to the point, why are the Orcs building a TRENCH, which they then had to cover with material to protect themselves from the sun. and which, incidentally, is visible to enemies...why didnt they instead build a TUNNEL which would provide the necessary sun-protection AND WOULD NOT BE VISIBLE TO ENEMIES...
Because everything conveniently evolves when the plot needs. There's no deep answer.
@@MichaelHill-we7vt Or, since they retreated from the sun under the forest canopy at the end of the last episode, just march in the forest and supplement more open areas with material strung between the branches.
with a script like this I wonder how the writers ever wrote their own resume
What I find truly amazing is that the harfoots (Harfeet?) were specifically added, against Tolkien specifically saying and writing that they played no role in the second age, they were added because people loved Hobbits and yet literally everyone now hates the harfoots and believes they're the most evil, physchotic beings in middle earth.
Way to go Amazon.
Gollum is more likeable. He was a Stoor
It's less amazing when we realize that these showrunner only understand political attacks, and nothing of morality.
Gotta say watching your reviews is more fun than the actual shows. I wish you could review every show.
I totally agree - I really love Disparu's reviews - they are just so awesome. Compared side-by-side I like the horribleness of She-Hulk even more, than the horribleness of Rings of Fail, as the former results in even more hilarious Disparu reviews. 😁
@disparu Just not the shows I like!!!
100% agree with this comment. I am getting more enjoyment on Disparu's take on this train wreck than the actual train wreck. Lol! Good stuff!
totally agree
im only watching your reviews, not even watching the show
Actually turning Númenórean soldiers into some kind of happy, newly conscripted amateurs. They look like a bunch of everyday people going on an adventure holiday. Don't they have an army? They just spontaneously ask random people if they want to tag along when going to war? Forget the lore, this is beyond comprehension.
i thought that maybe they were overpopulated and wanted to decrease the number of idiot citizen by sending them to their death 🤔 but then i remember the show isnt that smart 🤣.
@@superstd
That's a good one haha.
I think that Putin has watched this episode and is taking inspiration from it with his conscription plans!
Perhaps this is more like the conquistadors of Spain. Volunteers to sail to the dangerous place
@@GKwan111
didnt biden just left billions $ worth of weapons when trying to flee afghanistan ? (that they invaded but got bored of it)
As an archer I can absolutely understand the reference of being afraid of the string - i have to give them that point: it hurts like hell if it hits you on the arm you're holding the bow with.
Best part of the episode was noticing that they reused the same alley set where Halbrand fought the dudes for Isildur's scene with his friends. Billion dollar production right there.
“If blacksmiths spend all their time around swords, I wouldn’t be surprised if they could do some tricks with them.” -Disparu
Case in point: Will Turner.
This concept literally built up a major plot element of the most famous pirate movie ever.
Same with kingdom of heaven.
it's not like he's doing something that impressive with it.
Ah, using a fictional character to bolster your argument about another fictional character. Classic nonsense from someone who watches this clown.
@@joeterzio7175 Just like gunsmiths have no idea how guns work, or how to use them!
Speaking of clowns...
@@joeterzio7175 oh wow I’ve seen you comment on another post now with something negative about Disparu lol hey do you work for this show? Are you being paid by Amazon to comment on UA-cam vids to make the show better? Seriously what’s your story? Is this Galadriels burner account? 😂😂😂
My main problem with the series as a whole is that I just…. *Don’t care* about anything that happens.
Nothing FEELS important or relevant, or impactful. Things just happen and you are supposed to feel excited.
Anyway, another great video Disparu!
If you let children/leftists write shows, you're going to get childish shows. If you let let inhuman AI write your shows you're going to get shows with no humanity or understanding thereof. ROP has put leftists in control of photographing an AI script. So we get this empty, soulless, childish mockery of creativity, spiked with a heavy dose of a political, social-engineering diversity agenda.
💯 that’s exactly my takeaway. They takes us from one subplot to another and this constant spinning around is making my head spin. I don’t get enough time on any of the subplots to attach to any character or story line.
Nothing will happen. Nothing at all. Don't expect it to. Season 2 won't be airing. It will probably end in a bad cliff hanger. Nothing will move on.
Bit harsh, I want to know where they got the table from.
And a huge part of this is because of the choice to set the story at this part of the timeline with established characters . We know Galadriel can’t die , we know the rings get forged , we Elrond can’t die , we know sauron comes back, we know the harfoots make it to brandybuk etc etc the ending of this story has already been written
Let's see. A group of people who are not handicapped by either daylight or night can't outrun a group that literally cannot move properly during the day. There's no tension no urgency no reason for them to make a stand at the tower. Once you notice it, you'll see that a lot of the "major" plots are just recreations of the plots from the movies. This tower defense plot is an immitation of the Rohan plot from the Two Towers. But unlike the proper build up and tension where the audience knows that there was no other option for the people of Rohan but to stand and fight, this poor attempt gives no indication that the people's plight was desperate. This Bad Robot writing at its finest. Plot that is hundred percent dettached from common sense and logic.
thank you. i keep screaming at the screen, why dont they just run. they have shown middle earth sparsely populated - run, settle so ewhere new, u cant farm a defense tower
not only: they escaped from their village with plenty of time to prepare themselves for the journey. Yet they found themselves at the tower with 4 potatoes and they realized "oh no, we didn't take the food!".
@@DurginPaintForgeMiniatures It's the absolute pinnacle of crap writing: "Uhoh. We need a reason to send the kid back to town so various absurd subplots that are nothing more than actual fetch quests can happen. What if we..." "Can't, we already sent the script to repro." "Okay, let's say they forgot food. Then we won't have to rewrite what we've already got." "Cool! I mean, everybody has to eat, right?" "Right!"
They tried so hard to make a single mom a military leader lol
The way the elves try to carry the table is like the way Amazon tries to carry Tolkiens Legacy.
Well fucking said
Their "reinterpretation" of the tree(s) of Valinor and the usage/creation of the Simarils is unforgivable. That was such a pinnacle moment in the history of the noldor elves and all subsequent events, that them rendering it into something as stupid as "the silmarils went into a tree and made mithril, hur dur" literally breaks the history and all continuity of this entire opus. And before one of you smooth brains chimes in and says "they don't have the rights to the Silmarillion" it isn't entirely relevant (outside of a history lesson) to include this bit of lore for the story they are trying to tell, so why go out of their way to shit on it in such a horrendous manner and break the world they are talking about? Unbelievable.
probably the fault of the Terminator Franchise, but I thought the prequel had to respect the plot line of the original
If you've watched the episode closely, when Gil- Galad asks Elrond to recount the Song of the roots of Hithaeglir, Elrond says: "An obscure legend, regarded by most to be apocryphal." That's what it is. A stupid song, an obscure legend, in which Gil-Galad believes. It is not stated that this is exactly how mithril was created.
Lol @ smooth brains
Honestly even tho they dont own the rights, they could still refernce them (Giving FREE MAINSTREAM advertising to the OG cannon) as well as increasing their own...they just cant fallow the ENTIRETY of its contents, but reference should be absolutely fine, besides...the only ones who would understand said reference are those who trule enjoy the original works and giving them an extra tid bit of love....Like P.J. did...Ignoring original cannon i just...dancing on the grave of the creator. You HAVE ALL THE RIGHT to be pissed. I only know of Tolkein through J.R.'s movies...and even i can tell this is a mockery of his work. Seemed to me like in Tolkeins works, all were powerful in their own unique and interesting way, (1a) yet this show acts like the only way to make a great story is to create a Shonen/Shoujo with a self-centered ass of a character, with a tiny inclusion of backstory for the supporting cast.
1a - Galadriel's surface-level lore was amazing enough to put her on the same pedestal as Gandalf with a micro-fraction of the screen time. Tolkein's world, is probably the only world where the Elves interest me more than any race, and i am more relatable to a Dwarf (And Gladly) than the Perfect ideals of the perfect innocent form of life imaginable. (And yes, even perfection has it's flaws, why it interest's me so.
So be mad, this show is a mockery of art, had it been ANY form of art, it would be supported...instead its a "We did it better" and that is a shallow way to come at any form of Art or literature. If they cannot accept or understand the signifance of escapism in A&L than why should any fan to be happy of the real world.
@@SolidKore if they were going to try a modern re-interpretation they would have been well-advised to make it more tooth and claw-like Game of Thrones, some scenes when they play it for laughs out of embarrassing lack of real content (Elrond, Gimli and the table) is a cringe.
It truly amazes me that NotGaladriel has, at this point, been alive for thousands of years and yet has never realized that maybe if you don’t bully, demean, and threaten every person you need the help of, you might have a higher success rate.
FFS what do these writers think LADY Galadriel means??
It's okay because she's learned how to teleport her armor. She jumps off the elven ships with nothing but the tin shows up on her at the end of the episode somehow
Well, you´re "just some werewolf", so you obviously don´t understand the intricate ways in which "strong women" enchant and enrich the world! What would all these people be without her?! (happy, content and in peace?)😉
@@jacookie9707 don't you see? she got 1 day amazon delivery on her armor! LOL
Guyladriel wont ever become a Lady, she will become a lord! Who will proceed to be overthrown due to being insufferable, egotistical, and tyrannical.
Simple, none of the writers at any point has talked to a woman, or went to highschool with a powerful woman or really been in a room with a successful woman at anypoint in their lives.
I kind of wonder if we're really going to see an army of 300 Numenoreans trying to conquer Mordor on their own, or if they just spawn thousands more soldiers for the next battle scene and we're supposed not to notice. I don't know which of these two options would be the stupidest.
David Benioff and D.B Weiss...
one weird thing about this show is everyone seems angry and always arguing with each other. Bizarre
Very true, and probably part of the core issues of this show, completely agree.
The writers likely have gotten most of their experience socializing through Twitter.
They write what they know.
Sounds like women
I'm starting to think they spent most of the billion dollars on fancy glass lanterns. Don't know why, but they really stood out this episode.
Those were nice lanterns.
Probably the most authentic thing in this show.
Remember when these stories were about friendship, bravery, hardship, and the unlikeliest of heroes?
Now the "friendship" is strongwomen against The Man, "bravery" against The Man, "hardships" like being catcalled by The Man, and "unlikely heroes" being anyone but The Man.
Man talking to a crowd = Oh no! Everyone at home, boo at your screens!
I'm surprised Any Men bothered to show up for This Festival of Man Hate
From the unlikeliest of heroes to the most unlikable of heroes lol
Also notice how there are no inspiring friendships between the women either
@@alaia-awakened That's because women are two faced to each other.
The string on a bow can actually hurt your arm a bit, that's why you wear a protection so you can avoid bruises, but "don't be so afraid of the string" sounds way too dramatic 😂
If you hold the bow in a particular way, you can avoid it making contact with your forearm but a slip can cause it to happen so it's nice to have protection just in case. I imagine it's even more necessary for higher draw weight. It is good advice however to not be so mindful of the string since it would cause you to tense up or shake and affect your aim. Writing is still shite tho.
'I'm sorry, but I'm not going to defend a tower under the leadership of a florist.' OK, that's poetry…
1.)Reduce Gilgalad and Eldar to a Sniveling group of conspirators & oath breakers 2)try to say that a tree --which is NOT one of the Two Trees of Valinor somehow has a Silmaril hidden(?) in the heart of it & that Lightning somehow has 'Electrolyzed'(?) a vein of ore with the light of said Silmaril? 3) Let's not even get started on Galadriel's continued insufferability...
I am rather puzzled by the fact that Galadriel arrived in Numenor as a survivor on a raft from a shipwreck.......she'd been swimming alone in the ocean.....she reaches Numenor wearing just what she was standing up in, which was some sort of white flimsy nightie, she has no other property or effects.........so where did she get that beautiful flowing blue robe she wore while horse riding, and since she hasn't had the chance to return to her own native shores, HOW THE HELL DID SHE GET THE PERFECTLY FITTED ARMOUR SHE WORE IN EPISODE ONE? She didnt have it when she jumped into the ocean, she didnt have it when she got on the raft, and she didnt have it when she came ashore in Numenor, yet there she is, resplendent and magnificent in a suit of armour that she cannot possibly have...............now in Star Trek, dear old Scotty, bless 'im, always tells Capt Kirk "ye canna change the laws o' physics!".........well he's wrong, because it seems that Galadriel CAN do that, no problem..........
O
M
G
XD
knowing this show, it's probably iron man tech she got from tony before he died.
She ordered all that in Amazon. But, I don't know we're she had her credit card.
@@josepnebotrius872 dont forget that she said "I have a tempest in me!" she probably had her credit card in the same place..........
Portable Hole as a sanitary napkin. Keeps her goods in the hole....
I think Guyladriel is actually the shortest character in the whole show.
She's like a nasty little chihuahua with superpowers, all bark and bite, but honestly disgusting
Did anyone else notice what words they used in the song by female Sam? "Not all who wander are lost". They shoehorned in a line from a poem about Aragorn into a travel song for the hobbits!
“All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king.”
“The Harfoots are so evil Sauron said, I will protect you..” Genius
As Gollum would correctly say "Dirty nasty cruel harfootss!,".
Hearing about the harfoots, I understand why their descendant Gollum was a sociopath.
But he was a Stoor Hobbit
@@mlapointej Our lovely ignorant showrunners have never heard of a Stoor. According to them all hobbits are descendants of Harfoots. Or perhaps Halfwits is a more accurate description of the showrunners and their filthy nomadic farmer hobbits. 🙄
@@mlapointej Do you think the writers know that?
A huge problem I have with that fight scene is the fact that they were using blades with an actual Edge you would never practice with an edged blade you would use turney blades or wooden swords
Galadriel: I am sorry, come help me.
Halbrand: No
Galadriel immediately starts gaslighting him. Bruh.
Two nights back I visited Tolkein's grave and attached a dynamo to his corpse. I have since gained a monopoly on the British electrical power supply.
You think we can generate enough energy to construct some exotic matter?
&Daniel Leskov 😂😂😂😆😆
You could free Europe from its dependence on Russian energy!
The sword fight scene was basically every generic stereotypical high school fight ever done in where the bullied kid takes on a whole gang of other kids and wins, but the twist is they did it using swords and tried to rip off some Matrix moves. If the actress was fit enough to do a wall run I bet they would have included it.
The difference is that this time, its the bully that takes on every one.
They fight scene was one of the dullest, uninspired, parody vibe......it was quite possibly the worst sword fight in cinema history.
1 BILLION DOLLARS! and they forgot to make the CGI bridge big enough for the CGI boats to go under. This show is a masterpiece.
I bet they confused "Polish Dollars" (aka zloty) for US $...
I honestly don't understand why everyone is hating on this show, it's a great comedy
Gil-Galad sent Galadriel away saying her quest could bring the darkness she's looking for. Halbrand just wants to live a peaceful life, but Galadriel won't leave him alone bringing about the evil she's looking for.
💥🙌🏻
Yes, this has been obvious for a couple episodes... these writers are as bright as a half watt incandescent lightbulb....
Basically it's Galadriel, Elrond, and Gil-Galad's fault that everything turns to shit by the Third Age
@@silverscorpio24 which could have been an ok plot line if it were done by writers with working brains...
Just got done listening to Shad’s three hour rant on this episode and now Disparu dropping an hour long review. Keep the pain train rolling!
Ok the whole plot with Arondir has just gotten ridiculous. His commander died trying to tell the elves of Adar & the orcs. Now given the opportunity, Arondir (the only elf like elf in the whole show) has now completely forgotten the most significant order he's received over his entire duty. Completely baffling.
When Saruman's Uruk-hai were sweeping through Edoras, the fleeing villagers doing anything they could to save their loved ones showed their bravery. I cannot comprehend how the ROP show writers thought that making villagers commit to fortifying a defence against legions of orcs is anything but completely fucking moronic. In the words of the only actor who could have ever saved this garbage, FLY YOU FOOLS.
42:30 "Why are you sorry?" Because he's Sauron, duh. Also, this line highlights the brilliant subtlety of the script. He says "I'm Sauron" but catches himself mid word and corrects it to sorry.
Why did Galadriel have to train new recruits? Doesn't Numenor (the Best of the Best the race of Man has to offer, who made Sauron skip town after kicking him and his army in the face) have its own elite army to send to the mainland? Why would Miriel give Galadriel (who has repeatedly insulted and threatened every Numenorean she's come across so far) authority over a Numenorean army?
Because... Strong Wahmen? The real answer is of course that the writers are borderline retarded.
Galadriel's superiority complex would stop her from getting any support from anyone, if this show made any sense at all
In this canon that hasn't happened. They don't seem to be having colonies and dominions on the shores of middle earth. An (exiled) king of men near where one of their colonies are supposed to be had no knowledge of them existing.
@@kevincousino2276 This is not canon since they have no right to the Silmarillion. Its in most part an original story, an awful one at that
A damn travesty because gilgalad had to call them for help to send Sauron running
Out of anything they wrote so far, I am pretty sure that more than anything, it's the language learning scene that makes Tolkien spinning the fastest in his grave. Just compare it to the "good morning" dialog between Gandalf and Bilbo at the beginning of the Hobbit.
The "so speak louder" has the same energy as "you have to do better, senator" line from Falcon & The Winter Soldier
At this point, if they get new writers in for Season 2, the only thing that'll have any of this make sense is if Galadriel is Sauron in disguise lol.
I'm all for it. Then we can get a new (and actual) Galadriel. Or just pull a Dalas and she wakes up and it was all a dream, or a premonition lmao
They should just have the first episode of the second season zoom out of middle earth until it shows that the whole thing happened in galadriels mirror, being watched by an actual galadriel-looking elf, saying "The meaning of my visions are eluding me more and more..." (which is think is the tolkin equivelent of "what the fück did i just watch Oo")
My lore might be a bit rusty but I’m pretty sure that the immortal Demi-god Maiar / Istari didn’t start out with the mental acuity of slow toddlers.
They did not. And it's better to think of the Maiar as angelic beings. But if you want to think of them as gods, then they'd be lesser gods, not demi-gods. A demi-god is someone who is half-god due to having only one of his parents being a god. None of the Maia have parents. As for Gandalf... Olorin interacted with the Elves living in the Undying Lands quite a bit; it's just that most of them didn't know it.
Why is it that in most new TV shows/movies the villain is the relatable character while the hero is actually villainous? 🤔 Or at the very least the hero is so damned dickish you can't possibly root for them
Because “Progressives” write heroes as them, and the villains like the people they oppose.
Because "Good is being called evil, and evil is being called good"
It's because they want our society to see bad people as merely victims of their circumstances and the people fighting against them are bad because they're the ones who drove them to it. It's a disgusting recent trope.
I like how the mithril in Khazad Dum is actually directly under a tree in Linden. How the hell does that work?
0:08 8 seconds in and I'm already dying 😂
3:48 even Sauron doesn't mess with the Hobbits because of how evil they are.
5:35 ADAR trying to compete with the evilness of the MurderHobbitses
11:09 Captain and Ms
People with no love, goodness, or honor in their hearts cannot replicate a mythos crafted from love, goodness and honor. Quite simply do not possess the tools.
Interesting.
Yes.
They're not trying to create; they're trying to destroy.
I didn’t realise that Gremlins were part of Tolkiens world until ‘young Galadriel’ came along.
Hello I am Isidur! I was the king who defeated Sauron before this show character assassinated me! In this show I was fired from the navy because of an hallucination attack in wich I voluntarily stop holding a rope and got my friends fired after years of training, wanted to join an expedition so much that I voluntarily sank 2 out of 5 ships of the expedition for no reason and then off screen convinced my father to join the expedition despite him being contrary every time he was on screen! Don’t worry about the plot not making sense, the sea is always right!
What they completely forgot is that guyladrial is an immortal elf, one of the most gracious and most powerful characters in all of middle earth. She speaks with grace and wisdom.
I am rooting for Sauron now!
I used to believe that Halbrand is actually HalRon and the current biological body of Sauron. But I changed my mind. The show-runners have planned something much more exciting and innovative: Sauron is actually - Galadriel!!! That would be a great and totally radical twist, and there is no reason to assume that Sauron cannot assume a female body. It would explain why Galadriel behaves so out of character and has super powers. The show-runners haven't butchered her character at all! We just have not seen the real Galadriel!
I guess that means a certain someone will need to gender transition to take her place.
it makes sauron a transgender representation in the show, such a briliant writing.
@@ahyarhartanto1802 😉
6:56 I mean, it's worse than that. This is the same chick who told everyone to pack up & leave their town immediately & DIDN'T THINK ABOUT FOOD RATIONS. 🤦🏽♀️ & Now she's all like "Stand & Fight!!"...fight with WHAT WEAPONS, woman??!
I get that this abysmal show is trying to recreate the stakes of Helm's Deep -- its so obvious it's painful -- but it's not working here.
How about they just leave the tower and keep walking?
With poh-tay-toes?
Again, I love your take on this. I just rewatched the LOR movies for the umpteen time, and I noticed that in the scene with Galadriel and Froto at the "seeing fountain", when she turns all "powerful", before she passes the test, there is a point when for a second you can see she in wearing some kind of breast plate armor. I'm sure you noticed this, but I never did.
*Amazon:* The silmarils went into a tree and made mithril, dur hur"
*Fëanáro, to Tolkien banging his head against the Gate of Heaven:* Shove thou over, I am joining thee.
the series never fails to disappoint
Its one success...
Consistently fails to meet my low expectations.
Amazon: Task failed successfully
About the bowstring: you can actually hurt yourself from firing a powerful bow, the string hits you on the wrist of the arm you're holding the bow with, therefore bowmen usually wore a bracer.
As someone who gave myself a nasty burn before figuring out to properly use a bow, I agree.
I was looking to see if someone would point this out. I sure learned to "fear the string" when learning the craft.
Yeah, that was a mistake from Disparu. But the elf could have given the kid a forearm brace to protect it from the string instead of telling him to not fear it and suck it up ! ^^
If you'd actually shot a bow, you wouldn't talk about firing one.
@@rogerborg not everyone in the world is a native English speaker with a sense of linguistic nuance
Galadriel has a prime subscription and her armour was delivered in 1 day
LOL
maybe Halbrand made her armour as he seems to be able to magically make extremely detailed, beautiful swords in mere minutes apparently
"I swore an oath to not tell you anything about the mithril"
(trained for over a decade) How to tell the writers researched somewhere between 'jack' and 'squat...'
1. They use real weapons. To put it mildly "Every head wound is a gusher." Even dull edges can cause deep lacerations.
2. The instructor 'dodges everything.' That will get your ass kicked, because its MUCH easier to swing a weapon five times than it is to dodge twice. If just one of those guys was like "F***, I'm gonna wail on her" she'd go down with all the grace of butcher's slab of meat.
I'm surprised we haven't seen any Harfoot cannibalism yet
A line during the “let’s laugh at the dead” party about how tasty the guy who died by bees was in the stew they made from him wouldn’t have been out of place.
I'm pretty sure, when one of them got trapped and was sinking into the swamp, I heard one of the others standing around watching, saying "Looks like meat's back on the menu boys and girls!" 😁
“What about their legs? They don’t need those.”
That will probably be in the 'Annual Harfoot necro-orgy' episode. 🤮 🤮
“If we don’t get a lot of the secret thing you just found we all die”. Wow. Epic writing guys.
Is this the fight that caused Morfydd Clark to seek therapy because men were coming at her ? As an actress you'd think that she'd know the difference between acting and reality (I'm using the word acting in it's loosest sense)
These are strange times where i look forward to watching the review more than the shows.. keep them coming 👌
Becoming one of my favorite reviewers, not boring at all ;)
“Have you tired screaming at him?” I spit my tea out 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
The Cruelfoots formed the nucleus of Sauron’s evil empire. True story.
And they disappeared at the 3rd Age as free people's slaughtered them to the last hobbo.
Hatefoots
Question, where did Guy-ladriel get her armor from? She came to the island in her night gown and nothing else, right? But somehow the armor was there? Okay. Also, aren't Numenors knows for being amazing fighters? So then why are they training and sending a few kids to fight orcs? Speaking of that she still has no concrete proof Sauron is alive, right? So what are they going to fight and why would they? And why send like 20 kids? Wouldn't they send more than 3 tiny boats? And last week weren't we already boarding the ship to go? But this week we get back off to prepare to leave again? Please make it make sense.
The fact that they already had a full plate armour like that or were able to craft one in a few days for her just make the numenoreans look worse. So they KNEW what "good" armour is and still made that crap scale armour for their soldiers when they were capable of making armour protecting them. Bunch of bastard smiths who hate their own people and want them to die.
They must turn back because they also forgot to bring their food with them
@@GrafPathygoras hahaha!!!! Next episode we get ready to leave again.
To be fair I’m sure the writers in their real lives only know how to get their way by screaming and cutting people off so of course that’s what their “brave/strong” characters do
Plot Twist: The fakehobbits are actually loyal servants of Sauron.