Patton Oswalt: “My Inner Child Doesn’t Feel Like Chopping Wood Today” - Full Special
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- Опубліковано 17 лис 2022
- Patton Oswalt gripes about watching old movies in L.A., remembers buying weed at a coffee shop in Amsterdam and reveals why he got thrown out of the Anne Frank House.
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Original airdate: August 14, 1999
About Comedy Central Presents:
These half-hour specials showcased some of the best up-and-coming comedians of the moment. The show was a pivotal stepping stone for many of today’s stand-up stars, including Dave Chappelle, Patton Oswalt, Amy Schumer, Jim Gaffigan, Kevin Hart, Zach Galifianakis, Dane Cook, Bill Burr, Wanda Sykes and Maria Bamford.
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Comedy Central Stand-Up: Anti-Bias Statement: www.cc.com/info/k32ti7/ccsu-a... - Комедії
The irony of his ‘phantom wife’ comment is heart breaking.
At least it's not a rhino
Also saying he was like Templeton the Rat was oddly prophetic. Ratatouille.
Young Patton is incredibly funny. It's bitter sweet when he talks to his imaginary wife.
This guy's mayonnaise delivery was so good. He's got such a talent.
he sounds exactly like Morty
Patton Oswalt has the most NFL-player sounding name.
true....sounds like a 1980s football card.
think he played for the Steelers
In the sixth grade for some reason every day our math teacher would read the obituaries out loud to the class. I'll never know what the hell that was all about.
Hopeless romantic
Dude was a serial killer
That’s Werid
Reminding you that your time will run out. And you got to spend a lot of it sitting in class learning about how government works (and then growing up and finding out it just doesn’t)
Love that! To the kids:
Do the math, you will all die eventually, it's just simple math! Ha ha ha! Sweet Dreams!
Ah, gotta love old Patton, before the world was dark enough to actually appreciate his style of comedy.
Except for Robin Williams, all comics cease to be funny with age.
Patton Oswalt was hysterically funny when starting out.
There are some comedians where your like “Yeaa I can see him being funny in a social setting but as a stand-up comedian!?? Ehhh not so much.” Not Patton. He was created and BORN to be a stand-up comedian. He’s one of the greatest of all time.
"like templeton the rat from charlotte's web" - Ratatouille just got a whole lot darker
"He loves life, he won't let go"
ha ha ha!
I saw Patton back in 2019. He was so hilarious. It was unreal seeing Spence Olchin from the King of Queens show.
That show is underrated and still smacks
King of Queens was pretty good
I like how the audio is so quiet on the official comedy Central channel lmao
I luv how he tells the cameraman to "GTFO" in the intro..!! xD
One of my all time favorites. Patton
Ah the sixth grade, the age when the prettiest girl in school was still your math teacher.
English teacher for me.
Reminds me, I need to give Miss Lawless a call..
Yeah Mr Loomis was hot. He clearly worked out
I adore this guy.
4:18 "They'll bring their bullsh--"
🫨🫨🫨 Patton Oswalt is my all-time favorite comedian in the world and I've never seen or heard him curse in all my life... until now! 🤣🤣🤣
And don't forget the screaming!
What? He curses like a sailor. Are you a new fan?
The joke and title of the special just shreds me everytime I think if it. The context of the narrative just adds to the line.
70s SF Bay Area kid here...I've prolly heard "inner child" yada yada yada a few thousand times at this point. I've even said it myself. Predictably, The Man came the very next day and tore up my man card. 👍
Bastids.
Now, what have we learned?
I saw him about a year ago. It's amazing seeing him back when he was younger than I am now.
The headling out to see him in Dallas tonight. I love this guy
Big Papa Patton general of peace and hope thru laughter. Thanks for the laugh medicine for eons
Hello everyone enjoy your day
u have a BETTER day casey 🫶🏽
the fact that htis is from 1999 but most of the jokes are still completely relevant is bot hilarious and a bit unsettling.
It made me remember the time I was in Amsterdam, 1981, when pot was just starting to move out of the bars and into the coffee shops. In the bars, patrons would roll their own "joints". They would mix a gram with a large amt of tobacco, and it was a thing to pass around. Ppl would hold on to it for a while before passing it on. Also, they would fashion a "filter" from the cardboard of a matchbook. It was held it your hand in a way that your mouth did not touch it.
When I rolled an American style joint, it got some funny looks.
This guy is funny af in reno 911 as dungeons boy rofl True funny
19:24 i cannot stop weazing laughing at this
Most knowledge is forbidden unless. All ready taken and given.
He's probably my favorite comedian....and you know he's good because I mainly disagree with his political beliefs, but you can't deny FUNNY.
"SKY CAKE..!!"
4:05 This was around the time that inspired SILVER SCREEN FIEND.
Patton's cancer joke is very similar to Norm McDonnel's cancer joke.
Well this was taped in 1999, so make if that what you will
@@clawabidingcitizen Norm's special came out in 2011. Although he could have been telling that joke for years. 2 of my favorite comedians but they are very close in the premise.
I’m sure if he copied Patton it was subconsciously and not intentional.
It was an Onion article first I think
he is so funny
Wow, baby Patton
Oh, Patton, if only you knew you could have the Amsterdam experience just down the street from your house in 20 years
Super funny
I only know him because of ratatouille and Minecraft story mode😭
Home boy is on point.
We've been too the Dolphin Coffeeshop!
Apparently this was originally aired on my third birthday lol. It's crazy how well it holds up today.
The blade joke. Was it foreshadowing?
You know what character you should be? Cupid. Still in Amherst.
"Starbucks liberalism" is now a term I am going to use
I used to love his material and cry and laughter. I don’t know ifs me or just him and this material. Anyone reading this know some things we don’t??
Wonder who plays bass on the outro theme. James Genus?
I think God gave us laughter to remind us to not take life so seriously...chill out and relax....don't try to carry the world on your shoulders 😉❤️
Why do you think God gave us child cancer?
@@coletrickle1775 cause he's God 😂
Shows how much times have changed that he was bragging about weed that apparently had seeds in it. 😅
I want to hear him talk about Star Wars.
I don't Wanna Die 😂🎉 but you get Tired 😩
good thing he got a tv gig
He was ahead of his time. The crowd just didn't get it. Over their heads.
8:15 Had to pause to check out Supergras, am now down the rabbit hole. I bet the rest was funny tho
The sound mixing for this is incredibly low
Literally everything posted to UA-cam by Comedy Central.
@@clawabidingcitizen unfortunately you're right. I'll still point it out though
I finally figured it out! Patton is just a tall midget. He's so cute waving his short little arms around. Adorable!
The OG Justin Roiland Morty voice
SLATHERED, Bernie.
January 10 is my birthday, that's hillarious
He just turned 30 here, wow
I'm now older than he was when he recorded this and I don't know how to feel about it lol
I see Jesse is doing well in beacon town.
My best friend was that person who hated to laugh.
If I looked like a Picasso painting, I might consider self-harm as well.
Oswalt the man child
😄💯👍
Ooof the sound quality..
17:00
Judging by the build, the clothes, and the haircut, I'd say it's a hobbit.
HEY IT'S JESSE!!! 🤩⭐
Hi Jesse (from mcsm)
Perhaps the doctors hoped that him having to grow a nose upside down on his forehead for an entire year ffs...
...would have inticed him to change his mind...because who would ever accept such a thing..!?
"Well, if you're gunna be dumb...you gotta be tough..!!"
I just want to know when this was originally released because norm macdonald had avery similar joke about cancer.
1999
Pat,
You gotta know that you can say no, you, (respectfully) a-sexual promoter you.
Love ya, yo boy
Ah, his spectral wife...
Patton got away with murder
Damn Patton looks 12 in this vid.
Oh MyY gOsH ItS Guy frOm MinEcRAfT sTorY mODe11!!
its jesse
It's odd how quaint this routine sounds now. TV somehow got a whole lot better AND a whole lot worse since then.
CNN..... 😄😄 Bernie, theyre wheeling the sandwiches in...there is no mayonaise...whew
I'm 6 feet tall and never been stoned.
The top story Anne Frank and her family lived in was gigantic. There's no way any person with eyes didn't see that full on apartment with big windows. She also died of the Typhus Plague as accounted by many witnesses in the camp she was in. Can anyone name that camp? 200 bonus points in it for you!!!!
Go touch grass
🎈
But it is tho
Those comments about his wife …
Dr Lesterman. I'm sorry to bother you but i think i'm close to a temper control incident.
I will say he's absolutely spot on about liberals watching old movies and the type of person our ancestors had to be in order to conquer this country.
If you study forest succession, after a fire or other clearing, the first plants to move in are very different than the eventual much taller and more longer lived plants, such as the white oak trees used for bourbon barrels. Each has its purpose and time, and all are important for something. If things change so they are useless, it is extinction time.
@@jeffruebens8355 There is a lot to unpack in your very well worded comment my friend.
I think in reality there is a middle ground. You can't be wimpy to found a country, but you also don't have to be a sociopath, which is what a lot of conservatives believe.
@@waitselljones8068
There IS a middle ground.
Unfortunately greed, selfishness, racism, sexism, homophobia, fear of the unknown/different and the desire to be in control of everything and everyone is the problem.
And that's not a political statement, that's just my observation of how much simpler life could be for everyone if they all just chilled the heck out and treated each other with the same respect and love that they feel they're entitled to.
Vitano. Saint Michael is present now. In Jesus Christs name we pray amen.
Whatever you say, crazy pants.
All I can hear is Remy.
I love Patton, generally, but he got a little dark in this one for my taste. Nobody cares, right?
ᵖʳᵒᵐᵒˢᵐ 😑
Personally, I think he bombed....or the audience wasn't feeling his vibe. Awkward set.
I see where Tom Segura got his stand up from.
Except Patton dosent hate the poors
Patton Oswalt was never 30 years old. Quit lying, Patton.
He needs to Paus and rethink his life!,,,,,,,hee hee!
Yfu for that
Swing and a miss.
isnt Patton Oswalt a huge liberal?
He's probably more progressive than Starbucks liberal
Nope. Liberal is center right these days. He's left.
Doesn't mean he can't put stuff in a historical context. As he's saying, you can't apply late 20th/early 21st Century PC on an 1950s John Wayne movie set in the 1870s.
Wow. He ends with a suicide joke.
Here, today, Pat would probably not see this performance as his best.
.... Hey look it's that short guy that Keven James carried around on his show. A second rate Shadow rider
I can't even imagine being as butthurt as you are. Yikes.
Remember this guy apologized for a photograph with Dave Chappelle, his Supposed friend.
Remember you're a bigot though.
Patton was funny, but that crowd sucked.
🤡🤡🤡🤡
Awesome to know that avatars aren’t listening to you now. All people are now real human beings and your computers etc can’t do anything now. In Jesus Christs name we pray amen.
Hack
Sorry, but personally I find this guy to be about as comical as dysentery.
I dunno dysentery's pretty fucking funny when it isn't happening to you.