Just finished your book: Love Fat, then went directly home and made some toast, slathered it in butter and cheese. Then I ate a chocolate bar. Thank you
Currently reading Love Fat and then on to Rehabilitate, Rewire, Recover. My 17 year old is IP at CHOP for the second time in a year. Really need to be strong and support her in FBT. Your book Love Fat really helps me understand the terror that someone with an eating disorder feels towards food and I can be a more empathetic coach to my daughter. Thank you!
Im 43 and i cant recall one time when i loved my body or even considered my body a friend or on my side. Ive thought like,oh i look good in this outfit or whatever but...thats it. Otherwise in all my weight travels from 110-280lbs+...i was never never content. All i did was villify and on a path of constant improvement. Quite sad really. And now at 43 and fat folds and being single etc...be-friending my body and has never been harder. Or more worth it, im guessing😏 Step by step. Thanks Tabitha
I'd just like to say thank you so much Tabitha. The terrible thoughts have a way of creeping back into my mind all the time, but listening to you is the biggest support I have ever found. You have such a great approach. When mental hunger comes creeping back in, I listen to your words, order a pizza, and feel happy about it. The best part is that it is no longer the end of the world. Thank you so much, again.
I know that applies to a body that has grown larger over the years and is obese now,but when you start from a place already being overweight and you gain if you eat unrestricted,it's hard.I am at least 100 pounds over weight and I've had eating issues since I was 13 and I'm now 45.I had been restricting and exercising daily for years ,which led to a steady weight gain over the last ten years. I have stopped exercising for now.Instart to eat more ,gain and then get scared and go back to restriction.Even when I do eat more ,i half the time have no idea what to eat.I eat odds and ends little bit of this and that.I can't have dairy ,so that is a bit limiting . I'm afraid of never lowering my set point which is way over.i am better at eating foods that were off limits,but eating consistently is a challenge.Im rambling .Hope this makes sense.Dr Guadiani said something about some people stating permanently over their normal set point and I literally felt claustrophobic.The goal is to never diet again and I get that.I hope when I fully recover that my set point will lower in its own.I can't keep gaining ,I'll go nuts.If you can offer some advice that would be great.
Tassey Saavedra I started as underweight but it didn’t take much food and time to get me to BMI of 25... I feel so unattractive and sad bc I’m not even eating close to the amount of a non disordered women my age ( also 45 ) and already have gained so much which stops me from going further in recovery ... so I’m still restricting, gaining weight and can’t even look in a mirror without getting upset... feels like hell to be in this situation
lena jazuk I totally understand.My story is really long and more complicated than I put out there.Inwas a small weight but put on a few pounds from medication and so i started dieting hard and exercising hard core.I would gain and then I would do the cycle again.But at the point where I realized that I needed to recover from ten years of restriction and exercising and eating clean ,I was already at a high weight.I try to get better and then notice the weight go higher and then back to restricting.Its such a mind game.I too,have a hard time seeing myself in the mirror .I want to hide from people ashamed of how I look.I was bulimic from 14-21 and recovered from that until I couldn't lose a few pounds in my thirties.Only ate clean and so much was off limits because I thought I must be eating too much,but I wasn't.Now my metabolism is obviously so low I gain easily. I am trying everyday to get my calories up .Somedays I do good and other days not so much.I hope you can get there too.Id like to keep in contact with you so,maybe we can help each other
lena jazuk The more you go back and forth between eating and not eating, the more confused your body gets, so it’ll hold onto any weight it gains for dear life because it’s worried you’ll starve it again. You have to completely let go and eat, no compensation at all. Easier said than done, I know.
HEy Tabitha. Do you think you can attempt a video on how to gain weight if you are vegan and in recovery. I know you dont believe in being vegan and being in recovery but can you try ?
Nope. In 99% of cases, veganism is still striking a bargain with eating disorder. You can go vegan for ethical reasons when you're fully recovered, but that degree of restriction is unhealthy in recovery.
Bianca Bolanos I was vegan for five years and recently stopped, despite ethical choices. Veganism made me very sick and anorexia only hurdled that eventuality closer. Please eat some fish and eggs at the very least! Veganism is a degenerative way of eating for the way our bodies are designed.
I am currently gaining weight and recovering while being vegan, have been vegan years before I started struggling with anorexia and couldn't imagine giving up on this. First of all you should really think about whether you're really doing it for ethical reasons or because it feeds your ED. I can say from experience that it's really easy to gain while being vegan because there is a lot of vegan junk food, chocolate, cake, crisps, etc. out there and I'm eating all of it. I mean there's even vegan Ben and Jerry's so that shouldn't be the problem. The way your comment is written make me think that you see veganism as a diet though. If you were truly vegan for ethical reasons and not only as an excuse to eat only fruit and vegetables (just taking a guess) you wouldn't see gaining weight and being vegan as a contradiction. My advice if you truly are sure you're vegan for the right reasons: get all the vegan junk food you can find. Try all the vegan restaurants, all the meat replacement, all the sweets, all cookies, all pastries you never ate before (all highly processed) and you'll do just fine. For me it actually is a lot of fun to try all different stuff that came on the market while I was too deep into my ED to try them. This is my time to try all of them and have a grand time doing it. If you really crave animal product though (and be honest with yourself here) don't deprive your body of them. Good luck to you, keep fighting!
I'm vegan and had no problem weight restoring. If you commit to gaining you can do it. There are plenty of high calorie nutrient dense choices, even processed foods you can choose. Allow yourself to eat the sorts of foods you've deemed unclean, though. If you experience discomfort in big meals then eat frequently. Choose nutrient dense things like nut butters, nut, soy or coconut milks, yogurts, ice creams, etc. Feel free to message me if you want to talk.
Just finished your book: Love Fat, then went directly home and made some toast, slathered it in butter and cheese. Then I ate a chocolate bar. Thank you
Currently reading Love Fat and then on to Rehabilitate, Rewire, Recover. My 17 year old is IP at CHOP for the second time in a year. Really need to be strong and support her in FBT. Your book Love Fat really helps me understand the terror that someone with an eating disorder feels towards food and I can be a more empathetic coach to my daughter. Thank you!
Im 43 and i cant recall one time when i loved my body or even considered my body a friend or on my side.
Ive thought like,oh i look good in this outfit or whatever but...thats it. Otherwise in all my weight travels from 110-280lbs+...i was never never content. All i did was villify and on a path of constant improvement.
Quite sad really.
And now at 43 and fat folds and being single etc...be-friending my body and has never been harder. Or more worth it, im guessing😏
Step by step.
Thanks Tabitha
I'd just like to say thank you so much Tabitha. The terrible thoughts have a way of creeping back into my mind all the time, but listening to you is the biggest support I have ever found. You have such a great approach. When mental hunger comes creeping back in, I listen to your words, order a pizza, and feel happy about it. The best part is that it is no longer the end of the world. Thank you so much, again.
Exactly what I needed to know and to hear today.... thnx Tabitha!!!
Reading your books, thank you. You really opened my eyes after 25 years of different guises of restrective ED.
Which book would you recommend I read first?
Thank you for this. So grwatful
I know that applies to a body that has grown larger over the years and is obese now,but when you start from a place already being overweight and you gain if you eat unrestricted,it's hard.I am at least 100 pounds over weight and I've had eating issues since I was 13 and I'm now 45.I had been restricting and exercising daily for years ,which led to a steady weight gain over the last ten years. I have stopped exercising for now.Instart to eat more ,gain and then get scared and go back to restriction.Even when I do eat more ,i half the time have no idea what to eat.I eat odds and ends little bit of this and that.I can't have dairy ,so that is a bit limiting .
I'm afraid of never lowering my set point which is way over.i am better at eating foods that were off limits,but eating consistently is a challenge.Im rambling .Hope this makes sense.Dr Guadiani said something about some people stating permanently over their normal set point and I literally felt claustrophobic.The goal is to never diet again and I get that.I hope when I fully recover that my set point will lower in its own.I can't keep gaining ,I'll go nuts.If you can offer some advice that would be great.
Tassey Saavedra
I started as underweight but it didn’t take much food and time to get me to BMI of 25... I feel so unattractive and sad bc I’m not even eating close to the amount of a non disordered women my age ( also 45 ) and already have gained so much which stops me from going further in recovery ... so I’m still restricting, gaining weight and can’t even look in a mirror without getting upset... feels like hell to be in this situation
lena jazuk Im in the same situation! im 15 tho so way younger but i have to go to school and face people with 30+ lbs of extra weight 😞
lena jazuk I totally understand.My story is really long and more complicated than I put out there.Inwas a small weight but put on a few pounds from medication and so i started dieting hard and exercising hard core.I would gain and then I would do the cycle again.But at the point where I realized that I needed to recover from ten years of restriction and exercising and eating clean ,I was already at a high weight.I try to get better and then notice the weight go higher and then back to restricting.Its such a mind game.I too,have a hard time seeing myself in the mirror .I want to hide from people ashamed of how I look.I was bulimic from 14-21 and recovered from that until I couldn't lose a few pounds in my thirties.Only ate clean and so much was off limits because I thought I must be eating too much,but I wasn't.Now my metabolism is obviously so low I gain easily. I am trying everyday to get my calories up .Somedays I do good and other days not so much.I hope you can get there too.Id like to keep in contact with you so,maybe we can help each other
lena jazuk The more you go back and forth between eating and not eating, the more confused your body gets, so it’ll hold onto any weight it gains for dear life because it’s worried you’ll starve it again. You have to completely let go and eat, no compensation at all. Easier said than done, I know.
Tassey Saavedra
I would love to keep in contact as well
I’m not on Facebook so how would you like to reach me?
Email? Texting?
HEy Tabitha. Do you think you can attempt a video on how to gain weight if you are vegan and in recovery. I know you dont believe in being vegan and being in recovery but can you try ?
Nope. In 99% of cases, veganism is still striking a bargain with eating disorder. You can go vegan for ethical reasons when you're fully recovered, but that degree of restriction is unhealthy in recovery.
Bianca Bolanos I was vegan for five years and recently stopped, despite ethical choices. Veganism made me very sick and anorexia only hurdled that eventuality closer. Please eat some fish and eggs at the very least! Veganism is a degenerative way of eating for the way our bodies are designed.
I am currently gaining weight and recovering while being vegan, have been vegan years before I started struggling with anorexia and couldn't imagine giving up on this. First of all you should really think about whether you're really doing it for ethical reasons or because it feeds your ED. I can say from experience that it's really easy to gain while being vegan because there is a lot of vegan junk food, chocolate, cake, crisps, etc. out there and I'm eating all of it. I mean there's even vegan Ben and Jerry's so that shouldn't be the problem.
The way your comment is written make me think that you see veganism as a diet though. If you were truly vegan for ethical reasons and not only as an excuse to eat only fruit and vegetables (just taking a guess) you wouldn't see gaining weight and being vegan as a contradiction. My advice if you truly are sure you're vegan for the right reasons: get all the vegan junk food you can find. Try all the vegan restaurants, all the meat replacement, all the sweets, all cookies, all pastries you never ate before (all highly processed) and you'll do just fine. For me it actually is a lot of fun to try all different stuff that came on the market while I was too deep into my ED to try them. This is my time to try all of them and have a grand time doing it. If you really crave animal product though (and be honest with yourself here) don't deprive your body of them. Good luck to you, keep fighting!
I'm vegan and had no problem weight restoring. If you commit to gaining you can do it. There are plenty of high calorie nutrient dense choices, even processed foods you can choose. Allow yourself to eat the sorts of foods you've deemed unclean, though. If you experience discomfort in big meals then eat frequently. Choose nutrient dense things like nut butters, nut, soy or coconut milks, yogurts, ice creams, etc. Feel free to message me if you want to talk.
@@TheDevilWearsRaskol thank you so much for this response. How and where can i message you ?
This Is so helpfull ❤
😭💕