Getting into a relationship with the first girl who has shown me interest was probably the biggest mistake I have made. This scarcity mindset and loneliness had lead me to get into a relationship with narcissistic abuse. The relationship was 1.5 years and I broke up because I couldn't take it anymore. Took me years to recover from the traumabond that had scarred me. Rob is right. Experience is key. It's only after getting with more girls I now know how to lead quality relationships and know my worth. Which has allowed me to find another girl who is a great fit for me.
20yo male here. My ex broke up with me exactly 1 week ago. She was my first ever girlfriend for barely 3 months, I was literally addicted to her, nothing mattered but her, she was the one. We started at a time where I was going through tough times (still am, back problems, worst case I can be submited to surgery) and panic attacks and she was there for me all the time. From the early morning till night. Out of nowhere, she said "I don't love you anymore". Literally 0 signs of anything going wrong. And now she's in my friends group so I need to see her and talk like everything is alright. After all this traumatic experience, I need to move on and most importantly LOVE MYSELF, cause I never did my whole life. I gotta learn how to live again, focus on my 3rd year Computer Engineering degree (yes, because my relationship made me lose interest about my career and that's a HUGE NO cause they used to be your goals), focus on solving my health issues instead and all the issues of my life instead of thinking of the problems itself. My advice to men who are or are going to be in their first relationship: Love is beautiful, love is a good thing and making sacrifices for love is an awesome thing. And things might go right to you. But don't forget SELF LOVE, love your passions, your goals, your LIFE. Much love everyone
maan i know its hard but your life has barley started... you are young as fuck, you have sooo many years to improve yourself...just imagine what you could do in 5 years..and u say that you are soon finished with your degree, yeah dont worry just put the work in and you will see the results eventually
Self love is too broad, just stay true to your purpose and that love means nothing without respect. We as men need to educate each other of the dangers of low quality people in our lives and low quality woman that you fall in love with can be the end or a turning point in your life. We have to have more adults educating the youngsters asap, because we see the statistics already of the divorces.
This basically happened to me. Was together with a girl for about one and a half year. I got weak and put up with her hanging out with "guy friends" and it really stressed me out. Once I had enough and said I will leave her if she keeps doing it the relationship ended. Guess what, i'm feeling better than ever now and she is now dating one of these "guy friends" lol.
@@prakharprajapati323 A girl in a relationship who has guy friends is just looking for attention from other men, means you have to leave her where she belongs...to the streets. The same rule apply to men into a relationship who got female friends, his gf should leave him immediatly. This all new age bullshit that you can have friends of the opposite sex while in relationship is total BS and doesn't work for obvious reasons
@@prakharprajapati323 This is the rules i have set for myself now. If its a girl that wants to get serious, the guy friends have to go or I will leave, even if nothing happens, the stress is just not worth it, no matter what girl it is. Anyway, if its a girl worth keeping, she will either not have guy friends to begin with or will be ready to drop them once she want to get serious with a guy. But if its just someone I meet casually or its not serious/I don't see a future with them, then i'm completely fine with her having guy friends.
Big facts ive been with my girl since i was 13 she was 14 it has been 14 years im 27 still pretty young. I never had the problem of putting her on a pedestal as ive always lead the relationship but i did get complacent at one point and depressed for like 2 years straight. Now im doing way better improving my self constantly but during those days i lost my will and drive to do anything i didnt even have sex with her only like 4-5 times in those 2 years but she still always remained loyal and supported me It was hard growing up to a young man because i never had problem with women sure we did have on and off moments for a few months etc but we knew we would be together thats why those moments were so short I did fuck up once during 14 years which she not only forgave me but understood after that i realized how much i appreciate the bond we have and how i sort of took her for granted at one point thats how i got my drive back started going to the gym started a business etc now we have sex regularly and i feel like its mostly because we live individual lives becoming the best we can for eachother. All i can say is im lucky that i have such a strong woman by my side that saw value in me even when i became weak and was always strongly attracted to me i know its a double edged sword tho the pain that one of us will feel someday losing eachother is something to prepare for
This video found me a couple weeks too late, unfortunately. Found the girl of my dreams at a cousin's wedding. True 10, blonde, blue eyes, tall, thin, still a virgin, just finished high school (3.9GPA). She lives in a different city so I drove down for a week and spent six straight days with her. Watched sunsets at the beach every evening and had sushi. Taught her my favorite sport (tennis). Even had dinner with her family (she cooked amazing stir fry). I really thought she was the one. Had this whole movie in my head where we made long-distance work then I propose to her in six months. I guess she could sense how scarce I thought her to be. She told me over facetime, "I think we should keep our options open." I ended it right then and there. My pride couldn't take it. It's over. The thing is, she actually is a scarce resource. There isn't an abundance of pure, beautiful, traditionally oriented girls, especially in south Florida. What could I have done differently? Let me know bros.
If you think about it one out of every 3 girls is in the top 30% and prettier than the bottom 70% of the girls and so makes her essentially a 7. So one out of every three girls already means you are doing well. If one out of three girls is what you have to get then that is really not that hard
I've seen this happen all the time as well. Experienced it myself on two different levels. One with a more shallow relationship and it happened again with a deeper relationship. The problem is also not having a greater purpose in your life other than girl. If you have ambitions that are for you, your family, or anything unrelated to a girl or relationship, you'll be good. The problem is a lot of men find it hard to find purpose in today's world. What I usually ask to prompt other guys to find their purpose is asking them what they want their life to be like in 5-10 years. Especially a good question for men in their early 20s.
Exactly. It's not about 'farming' experience and promoting bad, low-value relationships culture by participating in it(let's mindlessly date half a dozen or more before we start thinking). Yeah, screw that. Have some worth. Demand something from yourself - AND from whom you're gonna date. 'Experience' doesn't matter if you have a spine and values.
Yeah just remove millions of years of evolution by forcefully feeding into the narrative that girls ain't that. Well the bitches ain't, but be damn assured a good girl would turn your world around, you WILL fight for a good girl and you WILL work hard for a good girl and yalls offspring. Just be wary of the sea of bitches.
Thank you for this video! I'm 17 and in a relationship with a girl who is 18. It's been 4 months now and the relationship is working perfectly fine. She's really high value and we both support each other in almost everything.This video is gonna help me throughout. Thank You
My brother married his first girlfriend and it's an absolute disaster. He spent a lot of time depressed and isolated, in highschool a few girls liked him but he didn't allow himself to get close to them, he spent his life studying and playing on the computer, then overcame a physical illness which cured his depression and gave him a will to live, he got a new job, he started doing things he always wanted and he searched for a girlfriend, then found this one girl who was looking for a boyfriend who came from a failed marriage... Only a miracle can save this marriage. We're catholic so there's no divorce, so if the marriage fails and he can't get a nullity then he'll never be able to marry another woman again, which causes him depression again because he dreams of being a father and having a happy marriage.
My first and current relationship started out very shit, toxic and just horrible, i was a depressed lonely little shit when i met her a year ago, she has been the first girl to show me interest, the first half (or slightly less than that) of our relationship was absolutely horrible, like fights evey week, even broke up at one point, whenever we fought she would insult me and say really hurtful shit, i would try to calm her down but most of the time also degenerate into fighting like her, but with time i have grown alot, and i mean alot, mostly due to wanting to improve myself, and realisations just as the ones rob mentioned, i still really love her, i can confidently say we havent fought in like months, i changed my mindset from that, oh shes toxic and whatever to, i truly love her, and if she loves me too, i can use her love for me to turn her into someone better, and fortunately i can say i have slowly succeeded at that Maybe there are some flaws in my judgement but as far as im concerned, my relationship has turned from something that drained me, to something that drives me to be a better man for her, and my future children (and also myself). But thats just my experience, i agree with rob, the risk is too much, i just happened to be very motivated by love so i turned things around
If you love someone, and you know they're who you want, it would be a shame to break up and date around just to wish you would have stayed with that person later on but it's too late. Dating around doesn't necessarily ensure you would have found someone better. That shows real maturity on your part because in the end, that's what makes every relationship work anyway is doing like you said. Not saying it's good to be in a toxic relationship but what you said sounds good.
I totally agree with this video, I got in a relationship with a girl (she stopped being in a relationship with me) and then I started realizing that during the committed relationship I was being too clingy with her, and then weeks after that happened I really started focusing on my growth and I started being extremely grateful for that breakup because it was necessary for my growth, meaning my first committed relationship was blinding me, so I would advise people to not commit (especially teens) too early in dating or in a relationship.
i'm 23 and i've never had a gf or been on a date..i was feeling confident until i watched this video..i don't know what to think anymore. People my whole life told me that I should not go in a bad relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship and just wait for the right one. I'm scared that the older i get my value will go down as a man because i've never been in a relationship. when i turned 18 i stopped focusing on girls (pretty much just gave up on being rejected all the time) and went to university and started to take care of myself: dressing better, skin routine, learning things...this video still scares me about the future though. my parents have only been with each other and met when they were 24 and it puts a lot of pressure on me
You're an adult, think for yourself, and if you date I think you should do it if you don't have confidence, but if you do, fix other aspects of your life you haven't yet
I did the same in my first relationship. Wanted to give her the world, started simping. Years later I’m over her, but I can’t ever go down that path again.
So what should I do Rob? I want to take the traditional and religious route of staying virgin until marriage. I want my first and only relationship to be healthy.
Im taking the same route, work hard and dont stray from your path, the only time you know you can get into a relationship is when your fine being alone
this extremly fits to me. I was single until the age of 26. I got my first girlfriend and I broke up after 7 months and I‘m totally depressed. I dated like 20 women afterwards but I didnt like any other women after my ex.
This man speaks truth! I was in the exact same situation that he describes about “becoming weak”, until I was introduced to the red pill. My relationship struggled for an entire year, but gentleman, being a man is worth fighting for the title of being a man.
I’ve lived this , When you get out of this type of relationship you will be different and know your worth. The hard part is getting out of this relationship.
The problem is, the more relationships a man has ( or a woman ) the less bonded he will be with his partners eventually and the more bad experiences the person has the less likely they can maintain longterm relationships because of emotional damage and baggage. I'm not saying he should just full on commit to the first girl, but if he has a good thing going it would be a shame to let her go just because he hasn't dated around. Special is special. What if she actually is special but he saw this video and lost out? But there are even studies that the more partners a person has, the less chance for staying married or ever being committed longterm in a successful relationship. And it's not really fair to the girl, if she just happens to be the first one, and you decide you just haven't slept with or dated enough other people so you let her go despite her being a good catch.
I recently got into my first serious relationship, and honestly I’ve never felt more anxiety, dread and sadness then I have now, I love her and she makes me happy but I struggle in bed with her I’ll be honest and I’ve never had this problem before, we both can’t finish and it’s caused me anxiety and a feeling of just not being a man or enough for her, I’ve never felt like this and it hurts to feel like this, has anyone else felt like this?
Dear Thomas, at least know and understand that this is VERY NORMAL. It is rare to have things go well when you're first starting to get sexually active. I know how it feels when you cannot perform in bed when you're new to it. It feels like you don't live up to the expectations of a man. But that's not true. Good news is, you will get better at it over time. I advise doing a bit of research on the erotic zones for women (neck, nips, clit etc.) and how to stimulate them. You don't have to have her finish through penetration only. There are many ways to make a woman finish. Acting dominant in bed often works with women and does half of the work for you. Don't beat yourself about it. Good luck.
I think you have performance anxiety and she’s just experienced. Get some help from a sexologist, you two can save it by getting help from actual professionals
I really like the way you speak and articulate yourself. I'm amazed that you barely have any uhms and uhs in your speech and yet this is a single take with no editing. Did you practice this skill? Also I have noticed the pattern you discuss in my brother's relationship with his wife. He totally tries to protect her feelings and usually does what she wants. Basically being a white knight but it really doesn't look like a healthy relationship. At the end of the day feminine women will respond well to a masculine man and will respect his wishs and desires if he has the strength to assert them without fear.
I dates some females when I was 15 and had that scarcity mindset, I started improving myself I get alot of women that look at me lustfully and try to date me, I have found a lovely women with great values I am 16 and a half I am still young and later on i will not allow myself to lose hope and self respect
How do I know if I was in love with love or with my ex? She was pretty much the first girl that really(!) showed interest in me. She actually was lovebombing me. I dated other women before but never had a girlfriend until the age of 26. While getting this attention was probably really nice for me I can name you so many attributes about her that I liked. She really fulfilled alot of characteristics that I wish from a women. Besides that she had psychological problems and the relationship was quite toxic. No any other women seems boring to me. I‘m the one who broke up with her but I‘m the one who is depressed. Think she was heartbroken for a couple of weeks but seemed to move on really quickly. Anyway I clicked on this video because I think this relationship might have destroyed my life. I wasnt depressed as a 26 year old single that never had a girlfriend. I wasnt happy either but I did fine with my life
My first gf that I had for 5 years, my gf asked if we could be friends, I did say “u know where to find me” as in I’m out of here, but then she kept telling me that “I love you” “I miss you” “I wanna be with you” which got me soft and come back but I told her I didn’t want to be friends, I feel I was trying to leave but she was manipulating me to stay
Realised that I was dating a girl that just wasn’t the one. It was the first time and for me she seemed like everything. She wasn’t special at all and wasn’t even ready for a relationship. We’ll see each other in future, since we have some friends in common, but I’m not gonna fall for the trap anymore. Traumatised, has serious problems with her father, hooks up with every guy who knows for the first time. Glad it was only for a month…
Rob, thanks for this advices, and trying to be neutral on giving them. That's what i like about you, i think i will jump one step ahead, (going through the red pill phase). And be early matured. Even tho that's not a great idea. And damn the baby😍 i really felt something special when u hold him at the end of the video. Be blessed my man
What if a guy knows he has options because he sees girls looking at him in the street and being obviously interested in him, laughing and flirting with. So that way he knows his value without having multiple real relationships? Should he still have multiple relationships with women?
This is so true I saw one of your videos rob on dating as a teenager last year because this girl started showing me interested Eventually she confessed feelings for me And I decided to start a relationship Biggest mistake i did was thinking she was the one And that we gonna be together forever and stuff I know i sound stupid but in saying the truth I blame disney movies Been with her for 3 months untill problems came She was more closer to my best friend Then me But i trusted them even tho i felt abit suspicious Eventually i left her And we found out he wants her for himself Her stupid mother never wanted us to split due to somthing about its not right I knew deep down i never wanted to be his friend and stop talking but for their sake i stopped Eventually we got back together but she still was acting to friendly with him Thats when i left her again and stoped talking to him Now shes a hoe Going with all different boys That ex friend Thank god i ended it But i really got weak and im building myself up I just wish i saw this video last year
I don't think it is necessary to get in relationships with everyone. If you have the right mindset then it is going be ok if you settle with the first one.
I am having trouble finding a woman that's actually interested in me. There were some but honestly, I'd have to ditch my moral compass to get it on with them. Any advice yall?
Wow really felt like you just described how I was in my four year relationship to the max from 2018-2022, so glad that relationship is over, and now that same woman had sex with a former friend that I knew for 10 years, just to get a reaction out of me, I didn’t care cause now I had better, and my income is better as well, so I’m chilling 💯💯
If you love someone of course you don't want to lose her/him lol. You talk as if you can just change girlfriends in a split second and form bonds with new ones just like that and be happy with anyone no matter what you've been through with someone else previously. Your advice is literally "they are all the same so who cares just change them like socks" and that couldn't be further from the truth.
I don't think you're really getting what he is trying to say. Two things can be true at the same time. Yes, we cannot just let go of someone we love. At the same time, it is also true that if we stick with the first girl we fell in love with, we lose out on much experience that can actually help us lead quality relationships. He never implied that you have to change girls like you're changing socks. The message is that (young) men need to watch out for settling too early with little to no experience. And he is right about it. Because when I got in a relationship with the first girl to have shown interest in me, it had some serious impact on my emotional and mental health which required me to recover from even longer than the duration of the relationship itself. Whereas now I'm more experienced with girls and am leading a healthy and energizing relationship with a woman whom I deem to be a good fit.
@@andnowyouknow3363 I think that this "spinning plates" is an advice for the lowest common denominator of society aka low iq men. If you are perspicacious enough you can determine if a girl is relationship worthy or not. Also I get the fact that at 35 you are peaking as a man but let's stop pretending that you at 35 and a 20 year old girl can actually have common things to relate to and talk about. So Id rather be with a 20 year old girl when Im 22 and form a bond, than be with a used up 28 y/o girl when Im 35 just because thats when I'll have the most money or whatever. Of course don't settle if you don't think a girl is objectively a wifey material but if you think she is I dont see why would you date around for 0 reason. Girls are drama anyways Id rather have the peaceful one than deal with 5 of them at the same time. Im in eastern eu tho so girls here are loyal af/ wifey material. Might be different in the failed western society I wouldn't know.
@@tristantateclips2994 I understand what you're trying to say, but I don't think you seem to grasp what Rob is saying. He never claimed that you have to go for an older woman or deal with 5 at the same time. He is speaking about gaining experience by not settling. That is NOT synonymous with saying that you should date MULTIPLE women AT THE SAME TIME. If you're truly a busy man and not some Andrew Tate type, then you don't really have time to be dealing with 2 women at the same time, let alone 5. The point here is, as Rob has mentioned, is that (young) men don't grow when it comes to relationships when they stick to the first girl they date for years. He even mentioned this happens to guys in their teens. They meet a girl in their teens and stick with her for years on end. For some, it works out well, but for a lot of others, it doesn't. And no matter how much love you have for a person, it won't be enough to actually gain proper experience with dating women to know what truly fits you BEST. I can be content with a woman, but in reality, she MAY not actually be good for my life. I personally experienced this. This happens A LOT. In fact, I have uncles who are dealing with that. Their women despise them, yet they stick around because they think "something is better than nothing". And sorry, I don't agree about this being advice for "low iq men". Perspicacity comes with research and experience. You can't expect young men with little to no experience have perspicacity if they haven't actually gone through the process to LEARN. That's like me saying someone should know what every button means when sitting in a plane even though they have no flight training, or else they are "low IQ". In order to gain perspicacity, you have to actually deal with & experience more women.
@@andnowyouknow3363 I disagree with the premise that you have to actually deal with & experience it on your skin. Theres a quote "A smart person learns from his mistakes, but a truly wise person learns from the mistakes of others". No need to make dumb moves if you read the information ( which is everywhere on the internet) + see other peoples mistakes. Dating around and having meaningless relationships just to gain "experience" is low return of investment imo, many meaningless relationships won't prepare you for the one that you really want. I mean Id say date until you find the girl that you see being your wifey, if she is 1st one or 2nd one or 8th one does it really matter? Lets say you see her as a quality woman and see her as being your future wife and shes the first or the second one. You are going to leave her just cause you haven't whored around and dated other chicks? To me thats dum. And I wouldn't compare having basic social skills & charisma & being witty and cocky funny and knowing how to make her orgasm which is all pretty fkin easy if your not a retard to operating a plane. As I've said, it might be hard for a low iq person, to me women ain't rocket science especially with all the info out there.
@@andnowyouknow3363 But again it's about preferences too, Id rather have one girl whos been with me since the beginning thru thick and thin than to have 7 relationships each 2 years long and share my memories with multiple girls throughout years. Maybe it's just me tho and I do respect if someone likes it the other way around, not me tho.
Most men don't have good dad figures in their lives that talk about what the woman nature is and how to vet properly, how to find quality woman. This is also why most relationships and marriages end in breaking up/divorce. One relationship can turn a '' good guy '' into a devilish playboy. But the fault lays in educating the youngsters from young to old.
Funny how all of these traits like being passive and compliant are extremely attractive in women and yet they are so often discouraged from this kind of behaviour and their mind often gets messed up from playing the field too much
Some people make their kids listen to Mozart in the hope he will grow up smart. This guy drops redpills in front of his kid so he will grow up a genius.
your kid's hairstyle looks fresh hehe
Bro got the freshest mohawk
@@KEBAB7927 on god, his cuteness paired with the freshest mohawk is a dangerous combination
Fr W baby
All advice videos should have mostly off frame babies and pets in them tbh
@@zachanikwano fr
Getting into a relationship with the first girl who has shown me interest was probably the biggest mistake I have made. This scarcity mindset and loneliness had lead me to get into a relationship with narcissistic abuse. The relationship was 1.5 years and I broke up because I couldn't take it anymore. Took me years to recover from the traumabond that had scarred me. Rob is right. Experience is key. It's only after getting with more girls I now know how to lead quality relationships and know my worth. Which has allowed me to find another girl who is a great fit for me.
yea , a day in the life with a woman is only good for one thing. learn what to do with the next 23 hours is the key to a great life.
same here except it was 3 months
stop spilling my past life 🥲🥲🥲🥲
Good for you man!
haha bad for you - Ill marry mine next year😂
20yo male here. My ex broke up with me exactly 1 week ago. She was my first ever girlfriend for barely 3 months, I was literally addicted to her, nothing mattered but her, she was the one. We started at a time where I was going through tough times (still am, back problems, worst case I can be submited to surgery) and panic attacks and she was there for me all the time. From the early morning till night. Out of nowhere, she said "I don't love you anymore". Literally 0 signs of anything going wrong. And now she's in my friends group so I need to see her and talk like everything is alright.
After all this traumatic experience, I need to move on and most importantly LOVE MYSELF, cause I never did my whole life. I gotta learn how to live again, focus on my 3rd year Computer Engineering degree (yes, because my relationship made me lose interest about my career and that's a HUGE NO cause they used to be your goals), focus on solving my health issues instead and all the issues of my life instead of thinking of the problems itself.
My advice to men who are or are going to be in their first relationship: Love is beautiful, love is a good thing and making sacrifices for love is an awesome thing. And things might go right to you. But don't forget SELF LOVE, love your passions, your goals, your LIFE.
Much love everyone
tough, but you will rock this man
@@adgru316 thank you and congrats on the UEL win :)
maan i know its hard but your life has barley started... you are young as fuck, you have sooo many years to improve yourself...just imagine what you could do in 5 years..and u say that you are soon finished with your degree, yeah dont worry just put the work in and you will see the results eventually
Self love is too broad, just stay true to your purpose and that love means nothing without respect. We as men need to educate each other of the dangers of low quality people in our lives and low quality woman that you fall in love with can be the end or a turning point in your life. We have to have more adults educating the youngsters asap, because we see the statistics already of the divorces.
@@nujuh1357 I understand, I'll be 25 in 5 years and omg 5 years is soooo much time, thanks a lot :)
This basically happened to me. Was together with a girl for about one and a half year. I got weak and put up with her hanging out with "guy friends" and it really stressed me out. Once I had enough and said I will leave her if she keeps doing it the relationship ended. Guess what, i'm feeling better than ever now and she is now dating one of these "guy friends" lol.
This happened to me as well
Bro I want suggestion how to I deal with that guy friend coz seeing them together really hurts me how you dealt with it...
@@prakharprajapati323 by becoming better
@@prakharprajapati323 ez, you tell her it's either me or him
@@prakharprajapati323 A girl in a relationship who has guy friends is just looking for attention from other men, means you have to leave her where she belongs...to the streets.
The same rule apply to men into a relationship who got female friends, his gf should leave him immediatly.
This all new age bullshit that you can have friends of the opposite sex while in relationship is total BS and doesn't work for obvious reasons
@@prakharprajapati323 This is the rules i have set for myself now. If its a girl that wants to get serious, the guy friends have to go or I will leave, even if nothing happens, the stress is just not worth it, no matter what girl it is. Anyway, if its a girl worth keeping, she will either not have guy friends to begin with or will be ready to drop them once she want to get serious with a guy.
But if its just someone I meet casually or its not serious/I don't see a future with them, then i'm completely fine with her having guy friends.
Grow alongside a relationship. Don’t take this as 100% true think for yourself.
Big facts ive been with my girl since i was 13 she was 14 it has been 14 years im 27 still pretty young.
I never had the problem of putting her on a pedestal as ive always lead the relationship but i did get complacent at one point and depressed for like 2 years straight.
Now im doing way better improving my self constantly but during those days i lost my will and drive to do anything i didnt even have sex with her only like 4-5 times in those 2 years but she still always remained loyal and supported me
It was hard growing up to a young man because i never had problem with women sure we did have on and off moments for a few months etc but we knew we would be together thats why those moments were so short
I did fuck up once during 14 years which she not only forgave me but understood after that i realized how much i appreciate the bond we have and how i sort of took her for granted at one point thats how i got my drive back started going to the gym started a business etc now we have sex regularly and i feel like its mostly because we live individual lives becoming the best we can for eachother.
All i can say is im lucky that i have such a strong woman by my side that saw value in me even when i became weak and was always strongly attracted to me i know its a double edged sword tho the pain that one of us will feel someday losing eachother is something to prepare for
What was the f up, and what happened during it, if it's not a secret? Like, did you two talk during that time, and what was the reason?
@@bababashqort5109 he went for external coochie I assume. But damn he got a solid one, and even luckier she forgave him.
Looks like your life's going up, wish you all the best, you lucky bastard!
This video found me a couple weeks too late, unfortunately. Found the girl of my dreams at a cousin's wedding. True 10, blonde, blue eyes, tall, thin, still a virgin, just finished high school (3.9GPA). She lives in a different city so I drove down for a week and spent six straight days with her. Watched sunsets at the beach every evening and had sushi. Taught her my favorite sport (tennis). Even had dinner with her family (she cooked amazing stir fry). I really thought she was the one. Had this whole movie in my head where we made long-distance work then I propose to her in six months. I guess she could sense how scarce I thought her to be. She told me over facetime, "I think we should keep our options open." I ended it right then and there. My pride couldn't take it. It's over. The thing is, she actually is a scarce resource. There isn't an abundance of pure, beautiful, traditionally oriented girls, especially in south Florida. What could I have done differently? Let me know bros.
If you think about it one out of every 3 girls is in the top 30% and prettier than the bottom 70% of the girls and so makes her essentially a 7. So one out of every three girls already means you are doing well. If one out of three girls is what you have to get then that is really not that hard
@@koma7778 but you’re competing with the top 30% of men (if you’re not already one) as well as everybody else
Congrats he’s going to grow up with a great dad and that’s awesome
I've seen this happen all the time as well. Experienced it myself on two different levels. One with a more shallow relationship and it happened again with a deeper relationship. The problem is also not having a greater purpose in your life other than girl. If you have ambitions that are for you, your family, or anything unrelated to a girl or relationship, you'll be good. The problem is a lot of men find it hard to find purpose in today's world. What I usually ask to prompt other guys to find their purpose is asking them what they want their life to be like in 5-10 years. Especially a good question for men in their early 20s.
I completely agree
Exactly. It's not about 'farming' experience and promoting bad, low-value relationships culture by participating in it(let's mindlessly date half a dozen or more before we start thinking). Yeah, screw that. Have some worth. Demand something from yourself - AND from whom you're gonna date. 'Experience' doesn't matter if you have a spine and values.
Yeah just remove millions of years of evolution by forcefully feeding into the narrative that girls ain't that. Well the bitches ain't, but be damn assured a good girl would turn your world around, you WILL fight for a good girl and you WILL work hard for a good girl and yalls offspring. Just be wary of the sea of bitches.
Thank you for this video!
I'm 17 and in a relationship with a girl who is 18. It's been 4 months now and the relationship is working perfectly fine. She's really high value and we both support each other in almost everything.This video is gonna help me throughout. Thank You
The little one seems so calm and sweet, that's cute !
The subconscious mind's thing is absolutely real
My brother married his first girlfriend and it's an absolute disaster. He spent a lot of time depressed and isolated, in highschool a few girls liked him but he didn't allow himself to get close to them, he spent his life studying and playing on the computer, then overcame a physical illness which cured his depression and gave him a will to live, he got a new job, he started doing things he always wanted and he searched for a girlfriend, then found this one girl who was looking for a boyfriend who came from a failed marriage... Only a miracle can save this marriage. We're catholic so there's no divorce, so if the marriage fails and he can't get a nullity then he'll never be able to marry another woman again, which causes him depression again because he dreams of being a father and having a happy marriage.
My first and current relationship started out very shit, toxic and just horrible, i was a depressed lonely little shit when i met her a year ago, she has been the first girl to show me interest, the first half (or slightly less than that) of our relationship was absolutely horrible, like fights evey week, even broke up at one point, whenever we fought she would insult me and say really hurtful shit, i would try to calm her down but most of the time also degenerate into fighting like her, but with time i have grown alot, and i mean alot, mostly due to wanting to improve myself, and realisations just as the ones rob mentioned, i still really love her, i can confidently say we havent fought in like months, i changed my mindset from that, oh shes toxic and whatever to, i truly love her, and if she loves me too, i can use her love for me to turn her into someone better, and fortunately i can say i have slowly succeeded at that
Maybe there are some flaws in my judgement but as far as im concerned, my relationship has turned from something that drained me, to something that drives me to be a better man for her, and my future children (and also myself).
But thats just my experience, i agree with rob, the risk is too much, i just happened to be very motivated by love so i turned things around
If you love someone, and you know they're who you want, it would be a shame to break up and date around just to wish you would have stayed with that person later on but it's too late. Dating around doesn't necessarily ensure you would have found someone better. That shows real maturity on your part because in the end, that's what makes every relationship work anyway is doing like you said. Not saying it's good to be in a toxic relationship but what you said sounds good.
I totally agree with this video, I got in a relationship with a girl (she stopped being in a relationship with me) and then I started realizing that during the committed relationship I was being too clingy with her, and then weeks after that happened I really started focusing on my growth and I started being extremely grateful for that breakup because it was necessary for my growth, meaning my first committed relationship was blinding me, so I would advise people to not commit (especially teens) too early in dating or in a relationship.
i'm 23 and i've never had a gf or been on a date..i was feeling confident until i watched this video..i don't know what to think anymore. People my whole life told me that I should not go in a bad relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship and just wait for the right one. I'm scared that the older i get my value will go down as a man because i've never been in a relationship. when i turned 18 i stopped focusing on girls (pretty much just gave up on being rejected all the time) and went to university and started to take care of myself: dressing better, skin routine, learning things...this video still scares me about the future though. my parents have only been with each other and met when they were 24 and it puts a lot of pressure on me
You're an adult, think for yourself, and if you date I think you should do it if you don't have confidence, but if you do, fix other aspects of your life you haven't yet
@@gabriel41568 date if i dont have confidence? what lmao?
This man is speaking facts I almost screw up my life on my first relationship, be strong guys.
I'd say most of the time it doesn't ruin his life but it can make women bitter for life with no hope of getting out
I did the same in my first relationship. Wanted to give her the world, started simping. Years later I’m over her, but I can’t ever go down that path again.
So what should I do Rob? I want to take the traditional and religious route of staying virgin until marriage.
I want my first and only relationship to be healthy.
work on yourself so you'll get a quality woman. Then there will be no worries.
Im taking the same route, work hard and dont stray from your path, the only time you know you can get into a relationship is when your fine being alone
@@thomasbitsch5488 Even a quality woman will try to turn you weak.
@@monke2395 okay bruh
@@monke2395 a quality woman will be a supplement to your success, not turn you weak, that would make her a low quality woman
Wow Rob! I remember when you said your woman was pregnant! And now I see this little fella pop up out of nowhere :D She looks so sweet! And patient!
This YT channel it s a gold mine...just a matter of time until will get popular
When I realized this I stopped blaming my crushes and exes in my past experiences.
My man spits the cold hard facts
That ending 👌😂 Anyways really good video
OMG Rob! i swear i learned more things in the first 7min than my entire school years. thank you so much and never stop making videos.
Bro your baby is pretty stoic, that good, he'll become a chad before you realize
This is helpful info, looking for a date and make sure that they are good so thx for the vid
this extremly fits to me. I was single until the age of 26. I got my first girlfriend and I broke up after 7 months and I‘m totally depressed. I dated like 20 women afterwards but I didnt like any other women after my ex.
This man speaks truth! I was in the exact same situation that he describes about “becoming weak”, until I was introduced to the red pill.
My relationship struggled for an entire year, but gentleman, being a man is worth fighting for the title of being a man.
this literally happened to me. glad the relationship ended and i could see it from a different perspective
The growth of your channel is amazing
Is that a mohawk? Kid looks fresh💯 Great advice - thank you for sharing!
You earned my respect, have a great day sir
I’ve lived this , When you get out of this type of relationship you will be different and know your worth. The hard part is getting out of this relationship.
I believe this .. I’m a woman who settled with one man the first one I met on internet and I regretted it
Why did I think the head was a knee?
The problem is, the more relationships a man has ( or a woman ) the less bonded he will be with his partners eventually and the more bad experiences the person has the less likely they can maintain longterm relationships because of emotional damage and baggage. I'm not saying he should just full on commit to the first girl, but if he has a good thing going it would be a shame to let her go just because he hasn't dated around. Special is special. What if she actually is special but he saw this video and lost out? But there are even studies that the more partners a person has, the less chance for staying married or ever being committed longterm in a successful relationship. And it's not really fair to the girl, if she just happens to be the first one, and you decide you just haven't slept with or dated enough other people so you let her go despite her being a good catch.
WOW! It's crazy how valuable this video is! Thank you!
you can really be a proud dad!
I recently got into my first serious relationship, and honestly I’ve never felt more anxiety, dread and sadness then I have now, I love her and she makes me happy but I struggle in bed with her I’ll be honest and I’ve never had this problem before, we both can’t finish and it’s caused me anxiety and a feeling of just not being a man or enough for her, I’ve never felt like this and it hurts to feel like this, has anyone else felt like this?
Discuss it with her , put it out there ,that's the best way to deal with it
Dear Thomas, at least know and understand that this is VERY NORMAL. It is rare to have things go well when you're first starting to get sexually active. I know how it feels when you cannot perform in bed when you're new to it. It feels like you don't live up to the expectations of a man. But that's not true. Good news is, you will get better at it over time. I advise doing a bit of research on the erotic zones for women (neck, nips, clit etc.) and how to stimulate them. You don't have to have her finish through penetration only. There are many ways to make a woman finish. Acting dominant in bed often works with women and does half of the work for you. Don't beat yourself about it. Good luck.
Communicate communication solves everything
I think you have performance anxiety and she’s just experienced. Get some help from a sexologist, you two can save it by getting help from actual professionals
if she makes you feel like less of a man think about ending it that stuff can crush you bro also communicate and see if its worth holding onto
Thanks for the video! Saved my entire life literally
Thank so much for reminding us to stay manly 💪
I really like the way you speak and articulate yourself. I'm amazed that you barely have any uhms and uhs in your speech and yet this is a single take with no editing. Did you practice this skill?
Also I have noticed the pattern you discuss in my brother's relationship with his wife. He totally tries to protect her feelings and usually does what she wants. Basically being a white knight but it really doesn't look like a healthy relationship. At the end of the day feminine women will respond well to a masculine man and will respect his wishs and desires if he has the strength to assert them without fear.
Really... This is truth... Same thing happened with me...
Men in this position need to experience their first breakup.
Been there done that.
Great to see someone putting up this perspective.
I dates some females when I was 15 and had that scarcity mindset, I started improving myself I get alot of women that look at me lustfully and try to date me, I have found a lovely women with great values I am 16 and a half I am still young and later on i will not allow myself to lose hope and self respect
This is me , high key hate myself for being exactly like this
How do I know if I was in love with love or with my ex? She was pretty much the first girl that really(!) showed interest in me. She actually was lovebombing me. I dated other women before but never had a girlfriend until the age of 26. While getting this attention was probably really nice for me I can name you so many attributes about her that I liked. She really fulfilled alot of characteristics that I wish from a women. Besides that she had psychological problems and the relationship was quite toxic.
No any other women seems boring to me. I‘m the one who broke up with her but I‘m the one who is depressed. Think she was heartbroken for a couple of weeks but seemed to
move on really quickly. Anyway I clicked on this video because I think this relationship might have destroyed my life. I wasnt depressed as a 26 year old single that never had a girlfriend. I wasnt happy either but I did fine with my life
Yh this video really put things into perspective
Surprisingly good video you're on the ball bro. Subscribed.
My first gf that I had for 5 years, my gf asked if we could be friends, I did say “u know where to find me” as in I’m out of here, but then she kept telling me that “I love you” “I miss you” “I wanna be with you” which got me soft and come back but I told her I didn’t want to be friends, I feel I was trying to leave but she was manipulating me to stay
You are speaking out of my heart, haha xD
Realised that I was dating a girl that just wasn’t the one. It was the first time and for me she seemed like everything. She wasn’t special at all and wasn’t even ready for a relationship. We’ll see each other in future, since we have some friends in common, but I’m not gonna fall for the trap anymore. Traumatised, has serious problems with her father, hooks up with every guy who knows for the first time. Glad it was only for a month…
Rob, thanks for this advices, and trying to be neutral on giving them. That's what i like about you, i think i will jump one step ahead, (going through the red pill phase). And be early matured. Even tho that's not a great idea. And damn the baby😍 i really felt something special when u hold him at the end of the video. Be blessed my man
Thank you a lot. This is a eye opener.
I have you at max volume and youre still quieter like a mouse level volume compared to most yt vids
Love you bro💪🏽
What if a guy knows he has options because he sees girls looking at him in the street and being obviously interested in him, laughing and flirting with. So that way he knows his value without having multiple real relationships? Should he still have multiple relationships with women?
This is so true
I saw one of your videos rob on dating as a teenager last year because this girl started showing me interested
Eventually she confessed feelings for me
And I decided to start a relationship
Biggest mistake i did was thinking she was the one
And that we gonna be together forever and stuff
I know i sound stupid but in saying the truth
I blame disney movies
Been with her for 3 months untill problems came
She was more closer to my best friend
Then me
But i trusted them even tho i felt abit suspicious
Eventually i left her
And we found out he wants her for himself
Her stupid mother never wanted us to split due to somthing about its not right
I knew deep down i never wanted to be his friend and stop talking but for their sake i stopped
Eventually we got back together but she still was acting to friendly with him
Thats when i left her again and stoped talking to him
Now shes a hoe
Going with all different boys
That ex friend
Thank god i ended it
But i really got weak and im building myself up
I just wish i saw this video last year
I am probably in the minority of your female viewers, but I really love your videos. Thanks for the content and for opening minds!
Tnx
this was such a relatable and important message told in this video rob!
I needed this so much a year ago...
My first relationship was just meh. It wasn't bad or good. It just felt like waste of time.
I fell in that trap and It's really bad
BROO THE END HAD ME XDDD
The kid be like "STORYTIME WITH DAD"
I don't think it is necessary to get in relationships with everyone. If you have the right mindset then it is going be ok if you settle with the first one.
wow this described my experience perfectly
Bro got the rizz with this hairstyles haha
I ended up hating relationships.
Better to get your heart broken early and that’s how you become a man!.
If your bald because of genetics, make sure your kid won’t be bald.
Lol give him as little poly unsaturated fats as possible during development years.
I am having trouble finding a woman that's actually interested in me. There were some but honestly, I'd have to ditch my moral compass to get it on with them.
Any advice yall?
Happened to me clearly. Same situation, hard to swallow
Problem is the women I’m interested in won’t even give me the time of day and the women that are interested in me I’m not attracted to
Y'all have options??
I just realised your kid was there 😂
Yeah my first relationship lasted 2 years and it was fucking terrible 😂
Now I’m in a different one for 2.5 years and I’m grinding harder than ever
21 never had relationship
So what's the solution?
I was also scared to lose her. And obviously I lost her in the end. I wonder if I will ever have another relationship.
You will, keep working on yourself and women will have attraction to you
Okay but what if women don't want you? Doesn't this assume women do?
All my life, in a single video...
This is not really true. Look at Elliot Hulse. Guy became massively succesful and has been with the same woman since he was a teenager.
exceptions to the rule never make the rule. Also, big difference between Elliot Hulse in EVERYTHING and your average Joe.
Is that your baby? He's soo cute 🥺
I like this, non toxic shit
Im the girl:(
Wow really felt like you just described how I was in my four year relationship to the max from 2018-2022, so glad that relationship is over, and now that same woman had sex with a former friend that I knew for 10 years, just to get a reaction out of me, I didn’t care cause now I had better, and my income is better as well, so I’m chilling 💯💯
No friend should sleep with any women you've been in a previous relationship with. That's BRO code 101. Keep winning 👊🏻
@@BecomeABetterMan Facts and definitely my brother 💯💯💪🏾💪🏾
Yup
Goede video
👍👍
If you love someone of course you don't want to lose her/him lol. You talk as if you can just change girlfriends in a split second and form bonds with new ones just like that and be happy with anyone no matter what you've been through with someone else previously. Your advice is literally "they are all the same so who cares just change them like socks" and that couldn't be further from the truth.
I don't think you're really getting what he is trying to say. Two things can be true at the same time. Yes, we cannot just let go of someone we love. At the same time, it is also true that if we stick with the first girl we fell in love with, we lose out on much experience that can actually help us lead quality relationships. He never implied that you have to change girls like you're changing socks. The message is that (young) men need to watch out for settling too early with little to no experience. And he is right about it. Because when I got in a relationship with the first girl to have shown interest in me, it had some serious impact on my emotional and mental health which required me to recover from even longer than the duration of the relationship itself. Whereas now I'm more experienced with girls and am leading a healthy and energizing relationship with a woman whom I deem to be a good fit.
@@andnowyouknow3363 I think that this "spinning plates" is an advice for the lowest common denominator of society aka low iq men. If you are perspicacious enough you can determine if a girl is relationship worthy or not. Also I get the fact that at 35 you are peaking as a man but let's stop pretending that you at 35 and a 20 year old girl can actually have common things to relate to and talk about. So Id rather be with a 20 year old girl when Im 22 and form a bond, than be with a used up 28 y/o girl when Im 35 just because thats when I'll have the most money or whatever. Of course don't settle if you don't think a girl is objectively a wifey material but if you think she is I dont see why would you date around for 0 reason. Girls are drama anyways Id rather have the peaceful one than deal with 5 of them at the same time. Im in eastern eu tho so girls here are loyal af/ wifey material. Might be different in the failed western society I wouldn't know.
@@tristantateclips2994 I understand what you're trying to say, but I don't think you seem to grasp what Rob is saying. He never claimed that you have to go for an older woman or deal with 5 at the same time. He is speaking about gaining experience by not settling. That is NOT synonymous with saying that you should date MULTIPLE women AT THE SAME TIME. If you're truly a busy man and not some Andrew Tate type, then you don't really have time to be dealing with 2 women at the same time, let alone 5. The point here is, as Rob has mentioned, is that (young) men don't grow when it comes to relationships when they stick to the first girl they date for years. He even mentioned this happens to guys in their teens. They meet a girl in their teens and stick with her for years on end. For some, it works out well, but for a lot of others, it doesn't. And no matter how much love you have for a person, it won't be enough to actually gain proper experience with dating women to know what truly fits you BEST. I can be content with a woman, but in reality, she MAY not actually be good for my life. I personally experienced this. This happens A LOT. In fact, I have uncles who are dealing with that. Their women despise them, yet they stick around because they think "something is better than nothing".
And sorry, I don't agree about this being advice for "low iq men". Perspicacity comes with research and experience. You can't expect young men with little to no experience have perspicacity if they haven't actually gone through the process to LEARN. That's like me saying someone should know what every button means when sitting in a plane even though they have no flight training, or else they are "low IQ". In order to gain perspicacity, you have to actually deal with & experience more women.
@@andnowyouknow3363 I disagree with the premise that you have to actually deal with & experience it on your skin. Theres a quote "A smart person learns from his mistakes, but a truly wise person learns from the mistakes of others". No need to make dumb moves if you read the information ( which is everywhere on the internet) + see other peoples mistakes. Dating around and having meaningless relationships just to gain "experience" is low return of investment imo, many meaningless relationships won't prepare you for the one that you really want. I mean Id say date until you find the girl that you see being your wifey, if she is 1st one or 2nd one or 8th one does it really matter? Lets say you see her as a quality woman and see her as being your future wife and shes the first or the second one. You are going to leave her just cause you haven't whored around and dated other chicks? To me thats dum. And I wouldn't compare having basic social skills & charisma & being witty and cocky funny and knowing how to make her orgasm which is all pretty fkin easy if your not a retard to operating a plane. As I've said, it might be hard for a low iq person, to me women ain't rocket science especially with all the info out there.
@@andnowyouknow3363 But again it's about preferences too, Id rather have one girl whos been with me since the beginning thru thick and thin than to have 7 relationships each 2 years long and share my memories with multiple girls throughout years. Maybe it's just me tho and I do respect if someone likes it the other way around, not me tho.
heyyy show the baby
Most men don't have good dad figures in their lives that talk about what the woman nature is and how to vet properly, how to find quality woman. This is also why most relationships and marriages end in breaking up/divorce. One relationship can turn a '' good guy '' into a devilish playboy. But the fault lays in educating the youngsters from young to old.
Funny how all of these traits like being passive and compliant are extremely attractive in women and yet they are so often discouraged from this kind of behaviour and their mind often gets messed up from playing the field too much
Some people make their kids listen to Mozart in the hope he will grow up smart. This guy drops redpills in front of his kid so he will grow up a genius.
Weak are those who believe in God none and cannot stick to one for the love of lust, an animal trait
For some reason UA-cam is convinced I am a man lol
Not complaining too much, seeing the other side’s perspective