Imagine taking a really hard cooking test and then your teacher yells “But now it’s time for the REAL test!” And just lets a bunch of wild bears in the building.
What annoyed me most was Solitude's lack of reaction. I accidentally pick up a Flower and the whole town is trying to kill me in seconds, but there's bear eating the people, oh well, that can wait....
Yeah you really need to mod in a town alert so that all the guards know when an attack is happening or it just doesn't work for stuff like this. Skyrim just wasn't made with the idea of the towns being attacked in mind, which is funny since thats exactly what certain events like dragons and vampires do. They need a town bell.
We thought he was a fool, we never listened to his wisdom. And as we are now being eaten alive by bears he’s looking down on us as the lowley bear fodder we always were.
Whiterun is a bad city to fight, as Dragonsreach tracks hostility towards you separately than the rest and will keep being hostile towards you even after the rest of Whiterun has turned nonhostile again. at least that is my experience :p
That caused me a minor flashback of these falmer. I had ducked into a building thinking that they couldn't cross a level transition. They could. And I crapped myself because I was looking at a plant when I got killed.
The fact that some people are watching cable right its really really demoralizing . Imagine having to watch 1/2 ads 1/2 repeated boring as fuck tv shows , fake news and movies from 2003
I honestly imagine just some mage getting pissed off the librarian is like my rules are my rules and the mage is like well how about 50 bears and just summons them
@Oofster are your comments hating on meme formats ironic? because you're literally never going to avoid the meme formats, sure they're used a lot but they're fine
Whiteruns problem is that most of its fighting force is outside the walls or in other places where they can't hear the bears. This event goes very different if you use open cities.
The amount of guards Riften has is crazy, I remember stealing just a single item and I was almost instantly swarmed by 20 guards. Why is Riften the most dangerous city in Skyrim when they have an entire army that can mow down the Thieves Guild with ease?
There should be an image on that shirt of bears, Sonic, and Fondle chasing Doug’s player characters. Either that or a screencap of the episode where he turned the launch distance on the characters up.
The perfect analogy of playing god: "Ok, these two guards just barely survived the first wave of bears... So we're gonna spawn five more bears. Good luck buddies."
Imagine walking around Whiterun’s shopping plaza as a young child minding your own business, and all of a sudden 5 bears appear out of nowhere trying to kill you.
Abe I don’t think all the cities were built for combat they look nice but they didn’t build a combat system for if the city gets attacked so it’s random if Bethesda developed a system for city defense white run and solitude and Windhelm would dominate
@@jamescolm1133 Considering that Rifton did so well, it indeed was build for fighting. You can see guards running of after a thieve and 5 or more guards attacking a single thief. Due to thief being planned for the game to randomly generate and the guards then kill them (without any 'great fuss, if you can say half the city charging at one person xD), it's obvious that this city will go well against any thread you spawn in there.
Would've loved to also see 1: High Hrothgar. They may not have weapons but anyone who ever has punched Arngeir for shits and giggles knows that the Greybeards can utterly mess you up. I would have loved to *bear* witness to this legendary battle 2: DLC areas. Can the Dawnguard defeat bears? And the Vampires? And maybe whatever factions there are in the dragonborn DLC?
I'm pretty sure he just spawned bears on High Hrothgar the entire time and the Grey Beards were raining bears down on the rest of Skyrim for the entire video.. A few even made it all the way through the portal into Sovngarde.
It should also be said that he finished the civil war questline in favor of the stormcloaks and I'm pretty sure that the replacement guards for the captured cities are a whole lot weaker than the starting guards.
I sometimes test Stormcloak vs Imperials and It’s always the Stormcloaks that wins. So, I guess the Stormcloaks won the civil war without being helped and that’s how Riften was so strong (By default Riften is Stormcloak territory). And DougDoug is a stormcloak, a true son of Skyrim
@@surrk1057 true but like I mentioned the starting hold guards are much stronger than the army guards that replace them after the cities are captured about all the hold guards have the same strength.
The Broken Kings That’s true, perhaps Solitude lost cause they had Imperial soldiers in patrol instead of having hold armor. Either way, Riften probably got overpopulated by Maven’s good black-briar mead for the guards.
You just combined your 2 most popular idea: "Insane Twitch Challenges" + "Cooking Metaphors that should not work, but do", and made your best video yet
"If you spread them out the cookie dough is individually exposed to the heat, just like this child is individually exposed to the bear" - this guy 2020
@@mme.veronica735 Don't undercook it, either. Most bear meat contains trichinosis parasites, and it should ALWAYS be cooked at 165°F (74°C) or higher to avoid getting infected.
“What do your rules say about 50 bears?” -My DnD playgroup, 2020 (edit: hOLY CRAP that's a lot of likes! I texted my playgroup at like 9:30 at night to show them; y'all are awesome!)
I actually learned how to correctly bake a cookie from this, wtf. I’m grateful, but I’m still trying to wrap my head around the logic of this video teaching me to bake a cookie.
it makes sense that riften, the city where theft and fights are the most common, would be best prepared for a fight excluding the legendary heroes who had a lifetime to prepare
@@Janoha17 To clarify, is that more or less likely to start fights? Because watching people shank each other over your garbage is like the best part of Riften...
@@kin-3877 I think it's from Futurama with Emperor Lrrr from Omicron Persei 8 commenting about the group dynamics of the gang from the sitcom "Friends" :P Yep it is, here's the clip: ua-cam.com/video/PVQO76I0Sh0/v-deo.html :D
who would win - The entirety of the pantheon of legendary heroes throughout history with great deeds of conquest and epic song of battles under their belts. or -95 chonky bois
Gray Philosopher also you are mistaken, it was Cyrodiil that the demons tried taking. The Chonky Bois were able to take on a bunch of yelling angry white men while the demons couldnt stand against the Elder Scrolls equivalent of Florida Men and Karens
I'm in awe at how well the cookie dough metaphor worked out. I thought it was just going to be a one off wacky thing to say and instead it continued flawlessly and tied the whole video together. A masterpiece of writing and pacing.
“the blobs of cookie dough are too spread out and are individually exposed to the heat and will cook really fast, just like this child is individually exposed to the bear”
this was the first doug video I had the honor of experiencing and almost 2 years later he's still my favorite content creator of all time. I love Doug so much. I go to these videos for a pick me up whenever I'm feeling down. Doug is genuinely my hero.
@@lateralath No one can escape the fate that was chosen for them. All that remains is the end, where you will perish. Eternal greatness exists only within myself.
LMFAO "this bear over here is going after the child" if only that poor bear knew that children are immortal objects in skyrim, he wouldnt be wasting his time xD
I knew it would be Riften. I once saw a thief steal something there and flee into the blacksmith’s house only for the entire Riften guard to follow him inside. Watching 20+ guards come sauntering out of one house was magical.
This seems like a good mod, “Bear Survival” where after a certain point (Maybe like after the 4th main quest) you get a letter saying “Winterhold has fallen, and whenever approaching The Pale you are interrupted by a “Border Guard” where he says “You must turn back, Winterhold has fallen by the bears and it is dangerous for civilians” and you now have too help secure “The Pale Perimeter” or if “The Pale Perimeter” is breached you gain a letter saying “The Pale Perimeter has fallen, please go to your nearest recruiting station to help defend your town from the Bear Apocalypse” and now recruiting stations are appearing in every city not breached. You can either slowly get letters from a courier saying that “ [City Name] has fallen” or get recruitied and help defend Skyrim.
Whiterun: You put small cookie dough spread around a pan. Rifton: You put one large cookie dough in a pan. Markarth: You put cookie dough on one corner of the pan, but the oven broke midway. Windhelm: Same as Whiterun but there's slightly more small cookie dough. Solitude: You put a couple of small cookie dough, then one large cookie dough on the other side of the pan. Ulfric: You only cook four cookie dough, but the chef is constantly blowing on the cookie dough while it is in the oven. Sovengarde: Rifton but you use the entire tub of cookie dough. Library: You try to cook something that can't be heated in a book. Sonic: You try to cook a cookie made of unheated materials.
Loved this! Definitely need a part two with these bad boy locations added: High Hrothgar Raven Rock Castle Karstaag Ruins Fort Dawnguard Castle Volkihar
Imagine taking a really hard cooking test and then your teacher yells “But now it’s time for the REAL test!” And just lets a bunch of wild bears in the building.
Then you realise your in riften
I would probably either die quickly or hunt the bleep out of some bears
Weren’t you on a general Sam video, ya dingus
Peak & Peak me? No. I don’t know who that is.
Peak & Peak no, I’ve never heard of that.
This is like a JRPG.
At the beginning: Bears trying to kill simple towns guards.
At the end: *Bears trying to kill God*
Literally just Persona 5
@@donutboi6187 that's what I was thinking 😂
Then the bears kill sonic. Not really sure where that fits in to your model friend.
It's like a JRPG but it's actually good which classifies it as a WRPG
@@gordonfreeman474 Is....is that hat films?
Imagine dying because of a bear then getting to heaven and then you're attacked by bears again
Plot twist: that was hell
moxxie in the latest episode of hellova boss... the sharks hate him!
sounds like the defintion of hell tbh
When u get mauled by a bear and die then u go to heaven and god says: but now it’s time for the REAL test, and another bear starts attacking u
I think you mean Sovngarde
What annoyed me most was Solitude's lack of reaction. I accidentally pick up a Flower and the whole town is trying to kill me in seconds, but there's bear eating the people, oh well, that can wait....
Yeah you really need to mod in a town alert so that all the guards know when an attack is happening or it just doesn't work for stuff like this. Skyrim just wasn't made with the idea of the towns being attacked in mind, which is funny since thats exactly what certain events like dragons and vampires do. They need a town bell.
Yea bro screw the bears, that guy stole a deathbell
@@Merilirem there is a city bell mod
Well the city *is* called Solitude…
…
That's why we have big ass bells everywhere in the old times
"The security in Whiterun is terrible. Shameful, is what it is."
We thought he was a fool, we never listened to his wisdom. And as we are now being eaten alive by bears he’s looking down on us as the lowley bear fodder we always were.
Whiterun is a bad city to fight, as Dragonsreach tracks hostility towards you separately than the rest and will keep being hostile towards you even after the rest of Whiterun has turned nonhostile again.
at least that is my experience :p
Remember they sent 4 guards to Riverwood and those guards don't get replaced in Whiterun proper.
The problem is that he had the lamecloaks as guards
he was right
we should have listened to him
Imagine finally ascending to Sovngarde after spending years as a just warrior, only to walk in and see everyone dead while 90 bears are spazzing out.
Then being eaten alive by the bears...
TheBlackCat viewerAccount well- eaten dead
no imagine going to sovengarde then having to watch hundreds of bears fight sonic
What happens if you die in sovengard
I'm more concerned if they drank all the Mead in the process
I’m predicting a Solitude victory, don’t let me down.
Damn it.
I haven't watched the whole thing yet so I'm still hopeful
Well shit
I'm betting Riften. It's my favorite of them all. Wish me luck!
@@Bricriu-gj9dd ding ding ding! (ish)
Same
Whiterun: is wiped out by a paltry 8 bears
The Companions: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
thx for showing me how ta type ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
@@BluSoldier.. You type it like -\_:)_/-
-\_( :0 )_/-
-\_:)_/-
(over defining bear sounds)
you look strong you should come to whiterun, and be a companion!
"As it turns out, it's pretty hard to cook god"
I'll keep that in mind.
You mean its hard to cook me?
so it’s possible, I WILL COOK YOU GOOOOOOOOD
@@notadog8662 oh, god
Stay away from me..
Basically the plot of Toriko
Don’t forget the spices. I don’t taste well without them.
"We're missing two Bears!"
"Check inside."
Skyrim in a nutshell.
That caused me a minor flashback of these falmer. I had ducked into a building thinking that they couldn't cross a level transition.
They could. And I crapped myself because I was looking at a plant when I got killed.
I liked just to be number 700
i know the app you got your avatar from
Nice pfp bro
I didn't realize bears could go inside.
Imagine hunting a bear then a strange voice says “but this is the real test” and suddenly 100 more bears appear
That would be unbearable.
@@mcbadrobotvoice8155 I wouldn't want to be the man bearing that weighty situation
gigi i don’t think they prebeared for it
...Need me to show you guys the door?
It would be quite the feat to defeat those bears especially if you would be bearfoot
This is exactly why Sheogorath is not allowed to spend time with Hircine.
@liamsteam walsh One of my favorite comments, hands down.
This is by far the best sentence ever spoken
Keheheheh
Worst comment
An unstoppable force meets an immovable object
Ulfric: "It is not I who is trapped in here with the bears. It is the bears who are trapped in here with me."
Well, he is the Bear mentioned in the book of Markarth's incident
Joynel Bonet Delgado
Yeah, that’s why the Stormcloak logo is a bear. And that’s also why the officer helmet is a bear.
"oh no, the bears have come out of the general store" this is why people choose youtube over cable
I’m glad someone else cracked up at this lmfao
No competition
i laughed so hard at that part lol
Bear- "2 chicken leg please"
The fact that some people are watching cable right its really really demoralizing . Imagine having to watch 1/2 ads 1/2 repeated boring as fuck tv shows , fake news and movies from 2003
This cook sure knows alot about Skyrim
Plot Twist: He’s the gourmet
Of course he knows, after all, you gotta know about the most ported game in history (Unless we talk about Tetris) to know how to cook the best stuff
@@PixelArtistBallGuy Most ported game in history, you say? My friend Doom would like to have a word.
You forgot to cook cookies on a mountain
More like this Skyrim player knows a lot about cooking lol
This man baked an entire tub of cookie dough just to show heaven takes 95 bears to to get obliterated
He prolly just had a sweet tooth that day.
Yeah, that's science
He sacrificed so much for us. And all he got in return was a shit-ton of delicious cookies.
this sentence would kill a victorian child
@@siamwseI don't get this meme anymore 😭
“Arc-Mage or not, my rules about books still stand!”
“What are your rules about 50 bears?”
I honestly imagine just some mage getting pissed off the librarian is like my rules are my rules and the mage is like well how about 50 bears and just summons them
Uh.... Yeah, that's what happened....
The rules stand.
No one:
Absolutely no one:
Doug Doug in the middle of a math exam: But now its time, for the REAL TEST
releases a swarm of 50 bears
@Oofster are your comments hating on meme formats ironic?
because you're literally never going to avoid the meme formats, sure they're used a lot but they're fine
*"Turns out, it's pretty hard to cook God."*
- DougDoug 2020
Xavier Faust write that down
is that a Toriko reference?!?!
You need to cook the hell out of him.
@@parakeet5400 👌👌
Riften: how you want group projects to go. Whiterun: how they actually go
Thanks....
The security in Whiterun is terrible, shameful, is what it is
No sovngarde is how you want it to go
Riftens just a bunch of thugs
@@johnbarker2650 at least they did their job
Keep in mind Ulfric and like 4 dudes did better than the entire city of Whiterun by a pretty large margin.
Whiteruns problem is that most of its fighting force is outside the walls or in other places where they can't hear the bears. This event goes very different if you use open cities.
Ulfric has the Thu'um
@@Merilirem "the outcome is different when using mods"
Yeah, no shit buddy.
@@firstlast6437 tf
Open citi3s yea
“How many bears does it take to kill heaven” is the best sentence I’ve heard all year. Ok maybe “turns out, it’s pretty hard to cook god” beats it
Duke fishy
@@firstpersonsnooter2519 same
HAHAHA
"i don't care how long it takes, we *WILL* cook heaven" is pretty good too
"What are your rules about 50 bears?" That was a good one too
The amount of guards Riften has is crazy, I remember stealing just a single item and I was almost instantly swarmed by 20 guards. Why is Riften the most dangerous city in Skyrim when they have an entire army that can mow down the Thieves Guild with ease?
Cuz the thieves guild is there. They have more and more guards to keep the thieves guild under control.
Because the whole city is crooked including he guards, evident by the guards trying to extort you when you go in the first time
Because of the Power vacuum that would cause
It's called corruption , you naive noob.
@@momoneymoproblemz they also extort you again when you try to head down to the jail to talk to someone
"It only takes 95 bears to kill heaven."
Write that down....it will be on the test.
The Grey Crusader what kind of tests does your school have you take?
@@stanstanstan2597 the only kind that really matter.
jonathan kydd true school
But now its time for the real test how many bears can a bear take.
Results:
Sonic the Hedgehog - Unbearable Lag
Sovengard - 95 Bears (Heaven is Audio Hell)
Ritten - 57 Bears (No Bears Amongst Thieves)
Markarth - 28 Bears (ArchBears)
Throne Room - 14 Bears (Ulfric has blown so many bears)
Windhelm & Solitude - 12 Bears (Windy the Pooh)
Whiterun - 8 Bears (an aBearsmal defense)
Library - Libeary
*He really ought to make merch that just says “This is the way that Skyrim was meant to be played”.*
This is the way that Merch like this would be sold!!!!
There should be an image on that shirt of bears, Sonic, and Fondle chasing Doug’s player characters. Either that or a screencap of the episode where he turned the launch distance on the characters up.
The perfect analogy of playing god: "Ok, these two guards just barely survived the first wave of bears... So we're gonna spawn five more bears. Good luck buddies."
God wouldn't give you anything you couldn't handle! Now stop whining and reattach your arm; _here come the bears._
This two comments are underated
@@lucascastillo9391 they really are
Spider Aba 😄
Skyrim-Bear noises
Doug Doug screaming over the bear noises- THIS IS THE WAY SKYRIM IS MEANT TO BE PLAYED
It’s been a year and I’m still genuinely in awe how well the cookies in the oven analogy works .
It's been another year and I still want to eat that giant damn slab of cookie dough.
It's been another year and I now have salmonella from the cookie dough
I just want to eat the cookies after they've been baked, god DAMN i need some milk to go with them!
This sounds like a DnD game...
"And suddenly: *bears.* "
"You encounter a druid- No, *50* druids!"
That moment your dungeon master smiles. It is already over.
Well Skyrim can be anything at this point lol
It IS a DnD game
TheTactical78 T7T8: honestly, I thot that too, I thot that was so dead! Lol 😂
"But how many bears does it take to KILL HEAVEN??!!"
-DougDoug 2020
Kook
@@Abdullah_the_slave_of_Allah ies
DougDoug: "Man, I really want some cookies. How can this be exploited..."
*Epic Skyrim Dovahkiin song slowly fades in*
DOVAHKIIN DOVAHKIIN!
NAAL OK ZIN LOS VAHRIIN!!
He had to eat all the dough tho
Hey, you. You're finally awake.
Imagine walking around Whiterun’s shopping plaza as a young child minding your own business, and all of a sudden 5 bears appear out of nowhere trying to kill you.
Imagine having a city that has a couple of werewolves and losing to bears.
Abe I don’t think all the cities were built for combat they look nice but they didn’t build a combat system for if the city gets attacked so it’s random if Bethesda developed a system for city defense white run and solitude and Windhelm would dominate
I don't think any of the Companions actually went out of their mead hall to help.
@@jamescolm1133 Considering that Rifton did so well, it indeed was build for fighting.
You can see guards running of after a thieve and 5 or more guards attacking a single thief. Due to thief being planned for the game to randomly generate and the guards then kill them (without any 'great fuss, if you can say half the city charging at one person xD), it's obvious that this city will go well against any thread you spawn in there.
Would've loved to also see
1: High Hrothgar. They may not have weapons but anyone who ever has punched Arngeir for shits and giggles knows that the Greybeards can utterly mess you up. I would have loved to *bear* witness to this legendary battle
2: DLC areas. Can the Dawnguard defeat bears? And the Vampires? And maybe whatever factions there are in the dragonborn DLC?
BEARS VS VAMPIRES
OH YES
What about the toughest cookie of tough cookies?
The Ebony Warrior?
@@quint3ssent1a would love to hear the metaphor for when the vampires enthrall the dead bears to fight the living bears lol
I'm pretty sure he just spawned bears on High Hrothgar the entire time and the Grey Beards were raining bears down on the rest of Skyrim for the entire video.. A few even made it all the way through the portal into Sovngarde.
Well... Riverwood is fucking crazy. Alvor is literally lvl 999.
WHY THE FUCK IS A BLACKSMITH STRONGER THAN THE GOD OF DRAGONS!?
Prediction: Solitude.
Result: Riften.
I’m actually impressed.
in reality, the most powerful city was sonic
It should also be said that he finished the civil war questline in favor of the stormcloaks and I'm pretty sure that the replacement guards for the captured cities are a whole lot weaker than the starting guards.
I sometimes test Stormcloak vs Imperials and It’s always the Stormcloaks that wins. So, I guess the Stormcloaks won the civil war without being helped and that’s how Riften was so strong (By default Riften is Stormcloak territory). And DougDoug is a stormcloak, a true son of Skyrim
@@surrk1057 true but like I mentioned the starting hold guards are much stronger than the army guards that replace them after the cities are captured about all the hold guards have the same strength.
The Broken Kings
That’s true, perhaps Solitude lost cause they had Imperial soldiers in patrol instead of having hold armor. Either way, Riften probably got overpopulated by Maven’s good black-briar mead for the guards.
"Turns out, it's hard to cook God." I absolutely lost it lmao
Top 3 places where you won't come out alive:
3. Solitude
2. Riften
1. Sovngarde
"the shouts aren't actually doing much" as a bear gets sent flying off through the map
and one bear getting thrown at a wall so hard it bounces off and lands on the other side of the palace
a bear spazzes in the air
You just combined your 2 most popular idea: "Insane Twitch Challenges" + "Cooking Metaphors that should not work, but do", and made your best video yet
That's basically this whole channel
Bored Again which is?
You mean 3 popular idea, Skyrim is one of them.
"If you spread them out the cookie dough is individually exposed to the heat, just like this child is individually exposed to the bear" - this guy 2020
My favorite quote is "What are you rules on 50 bears?'
Next vid: *How to cook a living bear*
Bear meat is actually pretty tasty but you have to be careful not to overcook it otherwise it'll be too tough
I dont think anymore bears are alive after this video
Like Bear Stew from RDR2
@@mme.veronica735 Don't undercook it, either. Most bear meat contains trichinosis parasites, and it should ALWAYS be cooked at 165°F (74°C) or higher to avoid getting infected.
This is SO stupid, this is all totally fake! You need at least 180 degrees F to make the bear edible.
“What do your rules say about 50 bears?”
-My DnD playgroup, 2020
(edit: hOLY CRAP that's a lot of likes! I texted my playgroup at like 9:30 at night to show them; y'all are awesome!)
What about 69420 bears?
Or 42069
SUDDEN BEARS
What do your rules say about ONE BILLION LIONS!?
What about ONE TRILLION BEARS
Teacher: what's 2+2
Doug doug: well it helps if you think of it in terms of creme brulee
Fr
"Just like this child is individually exposed to the bears"
"just like how this child is exposed to the bears".
*poor choice of words friend*
BEAR DOWN FOR MIDTERMS
Oh god why
Pedo Bear be like: 😈
I was like "What's worse than a bear?"
And uh
Yeah that's worse
DougDoug 2019: The Bears are facing extinction, due to global warming
DougDoug 2020: *HOW MANY BEARS CAN EACH SKYRIM CITY KILL-*
The bears BECAME the heat.
@@benjaminoechsli1941 evolution at its finest
@@benjaminwertz2379 I thought the same person replied to their own comment for a second
@@benjaminoechsli1941 dougdoug 2022 "can twitch chat control 100 bears to kill skyrim"
Next Vid: "How to cook a Radioactive Bear in Fallout"
in cookie clicker
I’m seeing you everywhere
*Proceeds to arm Flamer*
cooking you say?
First step: Lose all hope
I actually learned how to correctly bake a cookie from this, wtf.
I’m grateful, but I’m still trying to wrap my head around the logic of this video teaching me to bake a cookie.
only 1?
@@Ren-zg7nu no but now that you mention it, I’m gonna try to bake the biggest flocking cookie I can make.
So how did it go? You a world renownmd chef yet?
@@hypermaeonyx4969 no. I broke my oven.
@@liammaps2700 jeez! how big of a cookie did you bake?!
it makes sense that riften, the city where theft and fights are the most common, would be best prepared for a fight excluding the legendary heroes who had a lifetime to prepare
Try dropping a valuable item in Riften, everyone loses their shit.
@@rustyjones7908 If you have to drop something in Riften, do it along the east wall alley.
@@Janoha17 To clarify, is that more or less likely to start fights? Because watching people shank each other over your garbage is like the best part of Riften...
@@rustyjones7908 Less likely, since no one is around.
@@Janoha17 Good to know, thanks.
Why does Riften, the strongest of the cities, not simply eat the other holds?
Where is that from? I don't remember
@@kin-3877 I think it's from Futurama with Emperor Lrrr from Omicron Persei 8 commenting about the group dynamics of the gang from the sitcom "Friends" :P
Yep it is, here's the clip: ua-cam.com/video/PVQO76I0Sh0/v-deo.html :D
@@Micras08 oh yeah. I knew I recognized it from somewhere!
Imagine getting into heaven and everyone is being eaten by bears.
Everyone in Skyrim who recently arrived in heaven because they were eaten by bears: Ah shit, here we go again
" Sovngard is a fucking mountian of cookie dough!" - Doug 2020
It's where the honoured chocolate chips live, for ever or until the bears are unleashed.
Sounds like heaven
And the Bears, will eat well tonight.
Nice callback
@@ethanbrigode1491 Skyrim climate change
Ow shit it's Sonic
"just *BEARLY* managed to finish off that first wave of bears"
Haha was wondering if everyone caught that
I did and I was reading the comments and this man is the only one who I saw who recognized
@@elchapo8211 haha glad I wasn't the only one
who would win
- The entirety of the pantheon of legendary heroes throughout history with great deeds of conquest and epic song of battles under their belts.
or
-95 chonky bois
XD
SALA ß
When
@@Grey_World1 Bear is the most powerful resource on the planet. Demons are nothing compared to the absolute power generated by bears.
Gray Philosopher also you are mistaken, it was Cyrodiil that the demons tried taking. The Chonky Bois were able to take on a bunch of yelling angry white men while the demons couldnt stand against the Elder Scrolls equivalent of Florida Men and Karens
I'm in awe at how well the cookie dough metaphor worked out. I thought it was just going to be a one off wacky thing to say and instead it continued flawlessly and tied the whole video together. A masterpiece of writing and pacing.
“the blobs of cookie dough are too spread out and are individually exposed to the heat and will cook really fast, just like this child is individually exposed to the bear”
*FBI OPEN UP!*
Doug: “ It takes 95 bears to invade heaven”
Lucifer: “I’ve figured out it’s weakness”
This is the highly academic and vocational content I search UA-cam for.
this was the first doug video I had the honor of experiencing and almost 2 years later he's still my favorite content creator of all time. I love Doug so much. I go to these videos for a pick me up whenever I'm feeling down. Doug is genuinely my hero.
Doug Doug:”That’s all the cities”
Morthal Dawnstar Falkenrath Winterhold and all of the villages:”Are we a joke to you?”
Bellmaster D Yeah well he said cities, and those places are too small to really be cities
@@bugejoahshowalter3747 They need bears though.
I think cities that have walls count, considering they could walk out easily
i’m curious how the winterhold college would have done tho
@@vogonp4287 don't we all?
The notification showed up while I was tapping the screen and it played this video
*It was fate*
Nice
You cannot Escape your fate
SkinnyTraver Who are you, Diavolo?
@@lateralath No one can escape the fate that was chosen for them. All that remains is the end, where you will perish. Eternal greatness exists only within myself.
Beginning of video: Oh this could be fun to watch
End of video: What
That's DougDoug for ya
But now its time for the REAL video!
The way Doug comes up with baking analogies for strategies to defeat the bears that actually make sense amazes me.
Dude Ulfric was playing fuckin racquetball with the bears in his throne room lolol, getting those back wall shots off
This is the quality stretched metaphor involving food that I subbed for.
LMFAO "this bear over here is going after the child" if only that poor bear knew that children are immortal objects in skyrim, he wouldnt be wasting his time xD
I feel bad for the poor thing
Then Bear installs a kill children mod
His intentions aren't to kill the Child... Afterall he isn't named Pedobear for nothing
You can mod that out the console does not work to make them not immortal you NEED mods.
Santos Smith
There is no greater pleasure than a victim which can never die.
"I don't care, we will cook heaven!"
I'm dying. The voice, the humour, the cookie dough analogy 🤣
I love how Ulfric's logic is basically yeet or be yeeted
:0
A fellow pan enby?
Hi!!!!
@@kaylentherandom9743 what does that mean lmao
@@hissingbeatles499 pansexual nonbinary person.
@@kaylentherandom9743 that's pretty weird
@@hissingbeatles499 what's wrong with it then?
Me: Watches pretty normal videos
UA-cam Recommendations: WHICH SKYRIM CITY CAN FIGHT THE MOST BEARS?
"Turns out it's pretty hard to cook god" is my favorite doug doug quote
"It's pretty hard to cook god"
Write that down.
I knew it would be Riften. I once saw a thief steal something there and flee into the blacksmith’s house only for the entire Riften guard to follow him inside. Watching 20+ guards come sauntering out of one house was magical.
Disclaimer: The bears in this video where synthetic and manufactured solely to fight. No wild bears where harmed during the filming.
Time stamps whenever Doug says “This is the way that Skyrim was meant to be played!”
3:27
8:54
9:52
10:00
10:04
10:10
Not all heroes wear capes.
The quick descent into manic repetition
Found this video through a comment on SpiffingBrit's newest skyrim video. This is golden, and I'm disappointed I've never even heard of you before.
Welcome to DougDoug its a long way down from here
This seems like a good mod, “Bear Survival” where after a certain point (Maybe like after the 4th main quest) you get a letter saying “Winterhold has fallen, and whenever approaching The Pale you are interrupted by a “Border Guard” where he says “You must turn back, Winterhold has fallen by the bears and it is dangerous for civilians” and you now have too help secure “The Pale Perimeter” or if “The Pale Perimeter” is breached you gain a letter saying “The Pale Perimeter has fallen, please go to your nearest recruiting station to help defend your town from the Bear Apocalypse” and now recruiting stations are appearing in every city not breached. You can either slowly get letters from a courier saying that “ [City Name] has fallen” or get recruitied and help defend Skyrim.
amazing
I love this but it really bugs me that Winterhold isn't the pale, Dawnstar is.
@@_golden_sign_ that's why it's called the pale perimeter! He meant the dawnstar border must be protected from the weakling winterhold refugees.
Doug: Has a giant blob of cookie dough
Me: WRITE THAT DOWN
"These two guards just BEARLY managed to kill the first wave of bears"
I don’t know how to feel about this pun...
Unbearbly smug?
More like, beary bad.
Going back to one of the older videos like this it is crazy to see the difference in twitch chat
Me at 3pm: Summons Bears, Gods And Dragons
My Mom: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?”
Me: *Baking Cookies*
"turns out , it's pretty hard to cook God"
-DougDoug
“Just like this child is EXPOSED TO A BEAR”
That’ll put some hair on his chest. Or some blood and other assorted body fluids/organs.
Naaaaah
Whiterun: You put small cookie dough spread around a pan.
Rifton: You put one large cookie dough in a pan.
Markarth: You put cookie dough on one corner of the pan, but the oven broke midway.
Windhelm: Same as Whiterun but there's slightly more small cookie dough.
Solitude: You put a couple of small cookie dough, then one large cookie dough on the other side of the pan.
Ulfric: You only cook four cookie dough, but the chef is constantly blowing on the cookie dough while it is in the oven.
Sovengarde: Rifton but you use the entire tub of cookie dough.
Library: You try to cook something that can't be heated in a book.
Sonic: You try to cook a cookie made of unheated materials.
No one:
Absolutely no one:
Doug Doug in the middle of a math exam: But now its time, for the REAL TEST
*releases a swarm of 50 bears*
Bears: "Breaths"
DougDoug: "WRITE THAT DOWN."
*Breathes
"this is the way skyrim was meant to played"
>Todd has entered the chat
It just works
Markeos77 like king crimson
Whiterun guards, when I steal one cheese wheel: 😠🔪
Whiterun guards, when their citizens are attacked by 10 bears: 🙈🙉🙊
Loved this! Definitely need a part two with these bad boy locations added:
High Hrothgar
Raven Rock
Castle Karstaag Ruins
Fort Dawnguard
Castle Volkihar
Underrated comment bump pleaseeeeee
I would love to see this, especially Castle Volkihar!
I endorse this
ye i was thinking hrothgar would be funny
Take a shot every time he says “this is the way that Skyrim was meant to be played”
JOHN MITCHELL like, twice
Edit: okay the end caught me there
DapperShmallow I didn’t think anyone was actually going to do it
Take a shot everytime he says "bears"
and two shots every time he says "write that down"
@@lapidations ok
“Honey, where’s the cookie dough?”
“Bears.”
I've never laughed so hard! Thank you for this so much! "This is the way Skyrim was meant to be played" is now my favorite quote.
This video is the definition of I don't need sleep, I need answers
Me rewatching it at 5 am because I forgot to write down the numbers
Lol
6 months ago: Save the bears
Now: How many bears can each city kill?
"WE WILL COOK HEAVEN!"
That needs to be on a T-Shirt.
Never found a more underrated channel. I usually don’t casually subscribe, but you deserve it, my guy.
"So these two guards just *_bearly-"_*
[hits like]
*[Plays FFX music over Sovengarde, getting more intense the more bears are on-screen]*
[hits sub]
“So these two guards just bearly-“
[hits that’s solja boy]
That one guard standing motionless on the table in Ulfric’s throne room: so... this is what our pride has wrought..... *10 bears*
95 bears... From a Magic: The Gathering perspective, that's like 190 mana.
Maybe you can have infinite bear tokens cheaper...
This guy is legitimately hilarious. Just discovered him can’t wait to watch all of his videos