STORY TIME: HOW I FOUND OUT MY HUSBAND IS GAY *DOWN LOW MEN* | YVONNE QUEEN
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- Опубліковано 26 чер 2021
- HEY GUYS!! 🤍
WELCOME BACK TO MY CHANNEL STORY TIME EDITION!! THIS STORY IS ABOUT HOW I FOUND MY HUSBAND IS ON THE DOWN LOW. THIS WAS DEFINITELY A SHOCKER AND SOMETHING I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD HAVE TO DEAL WITH. THIS STORY ISN'T TO OFFEND ANYONE, ITS JUST SIMPLY FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES SO YOU PURPOSES AS WELL EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES. HOPEFULLY SOMEONE CAN LEARN FROM MY DECISIONS AND INSPIRE SOMEONE IN A SIMILAR SITUATION. LETS LAUGH AT THIS TOGETHER AND SHARE STORIES. I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH AND THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONTINUED LOVE AND SUPPORT.
DISCLAIMER: THIS STORY IS 100% TRUE. NO NAMES WERE USED TO PROTECT THE IDENTITY OF OTHERS.
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* Age: 28
* Race: Black
* Camera: Canon 90D + 18-35mm lens kit
* Editing: Final Cut Pro X - Навчання та стиль
Ladies NEVER…and I mean NEVER discredit what you feel!!!! The world calls it your intuition, believers call it the Holy Spirit. Call it what you will but ALWAYS TRUST IT!!!
PEOPLE OF GOD IF YOU ARE READING THIS THE LORD IS TRYING TO GET YOUR UNDIVIDED ATTENTION HE’S GIVING YOU ANOTHER CHANCE TO REPENT AND SAVE YOUR SOUL!!!
Dear Lord Jesus, I know that I am a sinner, and I ask for Your forgiveness. I believe You died for my sins and rose from the dead. I turn from my sins and invite You to come into my heart and life. I want to trust and follow You as my Lord and Savior.
💯 💯 💯
Pray and ask the Lord to give you the gift of DISCERNMENT this will help you distinguish the difference between what is GOOD for you and what is BAD for you. He will allow us to see what his EYES see behind CLOSED doors and once he REVEALS the TRUTH just embrace it for what it is and allow him to HEAL, DELIVER and SET you FREE so you can move FORWARD😇
@@chosenonpurpose489 Amen!!Amen!! Amen!! 💯 agree with your comment.
Amen ooh Lord
This is the thing, not many people care that you are gay. It’s when you manipulate straight people to be with you for a cover up is when it becomes a problem. This will get you hurt or killed in the black community. Be who you are, just leave us out of it. Glad you are out of that mess, blessings to you!
Exactly
I don’t think this is the truth. I’ve seen Black men be killed, jumped, beaten, abandoned by their entire family &/or lose their job/career potential by choosing to be openly gay. Straight people care very much, it’s why rappers never discuss the missing Black women but constantly discuss Lil Nas X & every post he makes.
@@MorganDanielleBeauty Some may care, but I also want to rephrase my initial response. There’s more of us who don’t care. I’m going to stick to the story she is telling in this video and double down on the manipulation of straight people is a NO NO!!!
This!!!! Don’t use straight people as a cover up it ends up hurting both parties
@@MorganDanielleBeauty but sheis telling the truth this has to be said loid, why are gays using straight people to hide their sexuality? Straight people have feelings too, we can't always consider gay people's feelings while ignoring their manipulation and means to straight people.
When I was in high school my first “boyfriend” was DL. He was the most manipulative, verbally and emotionally abusive person on the planet. He would embarrass me in front of others, intentionally leave me out or ignore me or talk down to me. He acted like I annoyed him in every way and he was feminine but I just was in denial and made excuses. I finally dumped him bc I couldn’t understand why I was being treated that way. Eventually he came out. I’m glad I learned the lesson early on: if a man is feminine and showing red flags but also in a relationship with you and treating you like dirt for no reason, he’s probably repressed and taking it out on you. I never made that mistake again. Happily married for 16 years. I pray you find a man worth your time!
Amen.
I don’t have a problem people being gay lesbian by or pansexual and transgender.
But I’m sorry to hear about that, just because his sexuality. Doesn’t excuse him to be treating you like that, he shouldn’t take it out on other people like you. If he can’t be happy, honest and true to himself.
He shouldn’t be dating somebody, because he’s scared of his own sexuality. I’m glad you’re happy and moving on.
💯
Gay men hate women because they wish they were us.
This is EXACTLY how my ex was.
Except he’s 45 and I’m 40.
When I calmly asked him if he ever thought about sex with a man, he squeezed the air out of my lungs and I woke up in the hallway.
To this day, I honestly have no idea what the hell that man is battling with.
This is a character problem, not a gay problem, and I'm sick of people using their sexuality/struggles as an excuse to abuse another person, risk their health, and sanity..
It really is.
I am with a man who I have felt very insecure with. Something my gut tells me is not to trust him and I have caught him checking out other men. He is 45, no kids, never been married and was not very experienced if you know what I mean…even his touch, it’s like he’s never touched a woman before. So I am paranoid and crazy for having these thoughts, according to him.
The worst part isn’t even him being gay, it’s him cheating and lying for so long :/
He could just be bisexual lol
Wonder why he felt like he needs t do that? Smh. He shouldn’t have to hide himself
That’s literally not a reason to KILL someone tf
him being gay is still a part of it because usually closeted men treat the women use a certain way whether they're cheating or not
That’s definitely the worst part for a heterosexual woman
As a gay man I can tell you from the minute she started talking about this I saw the red flags instantly. I think women often times don’t trust their intuition. I hope you got tested. I hate you had to experience this. Situations like these make women feel like they can’t trust men.
it's true - I think women get gaslighted a lot more because of second-guessing themselves or maybe desperately wanting to believe in a fairy tale.
We do I think my son father is gay .. my intuition always told me I even asked him .. just live ya truth
Wowwwwww. This comment just me think of where are my gay guy friends at to analyze this situation I am overthinking, but it looks like from what you’re saying I should just stop questioning myself. My intuition knows….
@@yellowonion2509 same
@@yellowonion2509 why do you think he's gay lol
When someone shows you who they are, believe them. Actions speak louder than words. He was giving you RED BANNERS.
Welp I’m here for a reason and I hate that I am..6 years and found out he was DL today..my child’s father..beyond hurt and not sure where to go from here…praying God restores me and heals me
I’m sorry to hear this. May you find peace, happiness again and the right man to love you unconditionally ❤. Praying for your strength.
Sometimes a man hurts every women that enters his life because his true soulmate is a man
😂😂
OKAY!
😂😆
💯
That part
I dated a guy that I found suspect ...I told him about my suspicion and told him if he was I am not here to judge him ...I gently told him that he should live in his truth ...that man broke down and cried ...I could see the fear and confusion in him...but u know what my approach and support gave him the courage to admit to himself and family that he was gay ...to this day we are friends...sometime fear and shame cause people to hide and deceive
kudos to you for handling that situation with compassion. everybody is just trying to survive and get by in life. if people would be more accepting and compassionate, people would not have to lie and create facades.
This is how you do it. Be open and cool about it and they will just admit it to you freely
awww this is such a cute comment. i love how you gave him support
I understand to certain point but do not waste a woman's time marrying her or having a child with her.
Thanks for this comment.
Literally this video saved my life, today I felt the depression of this happening to me 2 years ago and being blamed for his ways and the mistreatment from it. Like I'm still broken spiritually, emotionally and physically ill from this. More than often I feel like I'm just existing and feel beyond hollow inside. No amount of therapy and meds is helping....feeling so alone and then watching this has helped me today. Thank you for sharing.
💜💜😘😘😘 @ivory
Jesus loves you! Stay strong sister, it will get better 🙏🏾
Praying for you. So sorry you experienced that.
I Just prayed for you! Surrender everything to the Lord!!!
Thank y'all
After reading theese comments I truly feel like we are rapidly nearing the days of Sodom and Gomorrah 😢
Very soon!!!
Idk what’s more disturbing…the video or the fact that you have 1.5K comments of women who have similar experiences 😳
The comments .. definitely the comments
That part ❗❗
Indeed!
lol. the 2nd one. crazy!
Fareal
Skirts, suspect friends, grinding....we gotta stop closing our eyes to the truth.
I was thinking this story was gone be one of those where the signs were so subtle that I was thinking he played her but DAMN the signs were THERE smacking her in the face. Love is blind and glad she’s out of that situation.
@@rihrih2013 same here! I hate that women feel pressured to have a man that they overlook the obvious. Love isn't blind, shoot. Most women just put on shades.
I definitely don’t want to place blame but all the textbook signs were there.
She was young,we all were there at some point.
Exactly 🙄
My BD was down low and is now with a cross dresser. Same cross dresser neighbor he claimed to hate. Whole time that was his man
😂😂😂😂😂😂
This happened to me I never looked at men the same since I’m trying to get over it but it’s unreal that a man could love you and put your life at risk daily
THATS FUCKED UPP PERIOD FOR A MAN TO MESS AROUND WITH A DUDE AND PLAY WITH A REAL WOMAN FEELINGS
I almost dated a down low dude. But first before I got serious with himI let my pastor meet him. Well my pastor had a meeting with him. After the meeting my pastor told me to run he battling with his sexual identity. And I listen to my pastor I stopped talking to him. Years later I saw him in the store he was still single and feminine acting, I said to myself thank God for a spirit filled pastor. I’m happily married 13yrs. Praise God.
Let the church say amen! Now this is a covering
Amen
I'm sure the pastor should know🙄u leave him go fast🙄so the pastor can (counsel) him....you go on & let the pastor handle him🙄for sure
Judgemental pastors in the church lol. And folks wonder why people turn away from religion.
@@freedfromsociety_7950 maybe people should come out of sin and get saved before it’s to late. Pastors preach for your benefit not their own. You will die one day and go somewhere heaven or hell there is no in between. I suggest you choose Jesus and go to heaven romans 10:9, you can’t go without him.
You can’t watch out for it because they’re so crafty with it! You think they out playing basketball and they playing with each other’s balls!
Bhahaha 😅😂🤣🤦🏿♂️... No truer words were ever spoken ...
Lmaoo
🤣🤣🤣
OMG the way I just hollered at this comment lol. Hilarious!
Oh may 😂😂😂
I lived with 2 gay men when I lived in San Diego, one of them was "homo thug", that was the term and the other was I guess you could call I regular guy, you would have no idea they were gay. I saw so many married men come through that house I lost count. I saw guys I was stationed with,I saw people's boyfriends, siblings, there are a lot of men on the down low, bi-curious and just bi-sexual. Ladies my besties are gay, if you think your man is gay he most likely is. You are not crazy, or imaging things, he just likes having sex with other men.
100% this is the worst betrayal that a man can do to a woman.
No lie, I think this has happened to most women but a lot of us don’t know. I felt in my bones that my ex was like this, he never admitted it but there were 🚩 all over the place. I won’t trust any man now.
"Women's intuition" is real. It's a gift from God that we were born with. Never ever doubt yourself. Go with your gut. Ask questions. Be protected! When all else fails, get you a gay friend who can help you when your gaydar is off.
100% always 🙌
Not gaydar 😂
What if it dont walk like a duck or talk like a duck? Then how would I know?
@@chantaychani4045 It always comes to the light. Always. Not overnight but it gets exposed some way
@@chantaychani4045 Whenever you take your time to get to know someone, the truth is always revealed. Ifsomething feels off, ask questions and take notes. If a person is lying or deceitful, inconsistencies show up if you keep your eyes open. As my dad always says "only fools rush in".
Um...my friend who was married to her husband of 17 years found out he was gay way too late! He was physically and verbally abusive to her and on top of that, he gave her AIDES! She just recently passed not too long ago and my heart feels for her! MAY SHE REST IN PEACE!😥! PLEASE BE AWARE WHO YOU GET INVOLVED WITH BECAUSE THIS WORLD IS SO CRUEL!
Dammm these gay men need to be true to themself
This always happens to black women. So terrible. May she Rest In Peace
This is heartbreaking 💔
So sad 😭
Senting you hugs
I had this happen to me and I can tell you it hurt me to my soul. My heart broke in a million pieces. The deception was real..😢
I m sorry it happened to you and I hope you feel better now. Don't let him break your spirit on top of what he did, you deserve better
I had a boyfriend who when we first met he told me up front that he was with a guy prior to me and I told him what else is new ? The fact that he told me up front and let me make my decision as to whether I wanted to be with him is the thing that I respect
Did you stay with him?
@@blkafrocentricusa8429 She did say he was her boyfriend so I’m guessing they dated for a while.
@@yaboylucas2371 easy way to get HIV
Damnnnnn !!!! Tanya
@@lmontreze lol
I wish more men can own up to being bisexual. As a gay man, it would be easier for ALL parties involved. Sorry you went through this.
Jesus Christ loves you more than you could ever know.
I swear just leave us out of that shit
@@egoagbo8574 The fuck does Jesus Gotta do with this
@@trinarenaye5202 who is us
Exactly, Ive dated bisexual men before, but they were honest and open. There is a difference between being gay and downlow and a closeted bisexual. She didnt go into their sex life but that would give more light into what the real situation was.
Honestly this isn’t even a down low story. Wearing skirts, twerking on you, excitedly going to dinner with other men, up all night giggling over another man’s text….. he wasn’t down-low you were naive. Thank goodness you’re out of that situation. You’re beautiful
Definitely the signs were “V8ing” her in the forehead
EXACTLY
But he never straight up told her: hey I’m gay or bi. So yes still down low because even though there’s signs he’s not out .
Yup!!! Same thoughts!! Like she’s wonderful and no judge mental, but homie was clear as day!
Exactly
“How do we watch out for that? I don’t even know”! This resonated with me and I wasn’t even married to the dude that did this to me. Also I’m a white woman and he was 60 years old! You would’ve thought he had it figured out by now. Truly devastating and still healing 9 mos. later. Hearing stories like yours remind me that it’s not about us.
Wow 60 is crazy
Yeah, being a white woman should've protected you..😮
The man was battling the demon within. He knew you were a beautiful woman made for him. He went with the demon that enticed his perversions.
Literally every animal on the planet part takes in homosexual activities, especially our closet relatives.
My cousin married a man who was gay “down low” and had a child. When I first met him I thought he was gay by his mannerisms and him styling women’s hair as well. Even my grandma said she thought he was suspect. Before I could tell my cousin my suspicions they got married. They had a son but divorced once he came out. At this point I think it’s best for people to use our intuition about people. Our intuition is given to us to protect us. The more we listen to it the better we are at recognizing it. I’m glad you got through the situation.
So true 👍
That's messed up. If a man/woman likes the same sex. You shouldn't even try to be in a relationship with them.They like what they like and that's the same sex. I just don't see how anyone can live a life full of make belief and lies.
@@naturalcurlyhair8331 Exactly they out here deceiving ppl trying to cover up they true selves smh sum of these men are terrible
@@naturalcurlyhair8331 I totally agree with you. My cousins ex told her he didn’t know for sure if he was gay… he was 26 yrs old when they married. Come on now. I knew I liked boys as a young child. I think they are scared to come out because of family and society treating them bad. I get that but don’t marry a person if you are unsure or even know you are gay. Stay single.
A dear friend was deceived by a man who was gay but couldn't come out due to his religion so married her (as a cover). After being married for nearly 2 years, they apparently never consumed the marriage and she left him.
I'd never stay with someone for 2 years with no direction of where the relationship is going and would have outed him for being deceptive and in denial of his sexuality!
Your first sign was when he tried to commit self harm ever time you tried to break up with him. Anyone that does that is manipulative as fuck!
That's also an effeminate form of suicide.
TRUTH!
They know who to do it to. Cause someone like me won't feel bad. I have alway bn aware that its selfish and manipulative
Yep
Absolutely on point sis!
YES girl. My ex husband (a marine) told me when he went over sea after the 911. I'm home with his son. On the phone. He had got intimate with another guy before we got married 🙄 mind you we knew each other since highschool. How the ff you don't tell me. I refuse to keep this secret. My kids will grow up and know EVERYTHING.
Listen.. I dated a DL man. You can always tell. In some cases (Not all) they’re very close to their sisters . Always in their business like a female.also the eyes and his mannerisms told me everything. I called him out on it when we got into a heated argument. I struck a nerve. He started messaging me from a fake Facebook account with an attractive man on it.. weird .also most DL men are child molestors or sexually attracted to little boys. Be careful ladies please. Do your homework
He could have told you he was gay in the beginning and y’all could have been besties instead!
He’d have to tell me in the beginning before I find myself wanting him though lol
@@MsJae-qk2tw lol right
😆 Facts
He shouldn't try to be with a woman if he's gay. I wouldn't want to be his bestie if he sleeps with me knowing he's gay. I wish she had left sooner.
@@melissajohnson8696 I’m talking bout before a relationship begin and before they catch feelings lol
I was married to a man who, whilst throwing old clothes out I found a love letter from his long term male lover of six years. He fell apart when I told him I found his love letter tucked in the back of a drawer.. he said he was bi. This was back in the early 90s when it wasn't as accepted to be gay. We ended our relationship a while after after I realised I was just a front. It took me ten years to fully get over the mistrust, and 17 years before we spoke again. It took him 3 failed hetero marriages to realise it wasn't for him and now is living his authentic life gay.
Interesting
Wow 😯
Damn 😯
It was accepted in the '90's. He just did not accept himself.
Lol he was ashamed of him self that's why he hid .
This is so textbook and incredibly accurate to what I’m going through right now.. I’m married with two kids though 😞.. the gut feeling was unlike something I ever felt before and it never went away til I dug and dug.. he denied and denied and denied
I married one too. Thank God I got through the divorce. He still denies it , but EVERYONE knows he's bisexual. As a matter of fact beforehand, it seems like the whole city knew but me and nobody said anything 😓
The denial. Looking back I have all these holes I need filled and I can’t get any answers. It’s horribly frustrating. I don’t care if he’s gay, I need MY answers to move on.
I’ve been through this and it’s sad because not only were we married, but we have a child together. It sucks sis and honestly it’s a traumatic experience. To this day I question every man and first sign of anything I’m outta there…quick!
It's scary and traumatizing. She said he ALWAYS talked about guys at work. That was a sign. No straight man talks about other guys. When I said other guys.. I should've been more specific.. If he's mentioning gay guys at work or anywhere he goes frequently.
Ok I need more Information bc now I‘m scared
Me To🤦..But Only Thing We Had No Children Toogether
😩❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹 peace and healing to you Love so sorry this happened to you
Factsss, I question every man & they might be genuinely straight but I just don’t know. Very traumatic.
I often wondered why most men who struggle with their sexuality are aggressive towards women... It's striking that you made that connection in your previous marriage.
Yea if a man disrespects me I assume he is gay
@@_prettybrownbrown7729 That's narcissistic asf 🤣
@@professorxslave1500 narcissistic is not the correct decription. Perhaps assumptive or ill informed are better decriptors, but you dont have enough information about the poster to call them narcissistic. It is a complete misuse of that disorder.
@@nquisitivt I'm going to need you to get familiar with a dictionary or utilize autocorrect to make sure your spelling skills are up to par before coming for me Miss. It's not that serious my dear.
@@professorxslave1500
We want love, we want marriage, so it's hard to accept the signs. Not just the signs that a guy is gay, but also other signs of problems to come. The biggest one to me was when family and friends thought he might be suspect. The same thing happened to my best friend.
That being said, I'm divorced because my husband had completely different issues. There were signs with my husband also. So we all could do a better job of accepting reality and being good with being single.
Not me calling up my bf and asking if he’s gay😭😭😭😭 girl this story is something else omfg🤧
Also not all gay liars dress “different”. Men that are gay definitely dress like men.
Facts
Yeah, I was thinking the same thing, dress sense has marginally anything to do with it
They the manliest ones some times 🤪
They be wearing street fashion and snap backs 😬 like you can’t tell if someone is gay by their clothes
@@Mystixspiral nahhh not all the time, they are some that dress extremely manly like the manliest man you can think of, but they are very much gay but some of them don’t bottom
PRAYER AND DISCERNMENT FROM GOD WILL KEEP YOU ON POINT FROM THESE UNTRUTHFUL TIME STEALERS
Amen! I agree with you.
Narcissistic DL Men. I married one too. Whats even more embarrassing is he was my 2nd husband. 6 yrs of BS, close to NO sex, and financial abuse. Im so proud of myself for noy allowing shame to keep me there.
There's a book about this coming out: Deception, Disease, & Desperation: A Man's Guide for Women to Identify and Avoid Closeted Gay Men
There more black women with this story than you can ever imagine. The problem is that we don’t share our stories because we’re too ashamed and traumatized by the reality. The sad part is that they’re giving sista’s HIV at an alarming rate. I ask men upfront, “are you gay or have you ever engaged in bisexual activities?” Yea, some may take offense but I DGAF because my health comes first! Sista’s please protect your body and energy. BTW your hair looks beautiful Doll😍
My mother was 17 when she had me and 19 when she had my brother.. my dad was the same age as her.. his parents moved away to another state. My dad died when I was 15 years old and when I went to the funeral on the friends side there wasn’t nothing but men.. I thought nothing of it but it was something that stayed in my mind. Come to find out later in my 30s the real reason behind my father’s death was AIDS and he was gay or bisexual idk because I never will be able to speak to him about it but I hurt so bad for my mom because she loved my dad so much she couldn’t even make her marriage work because she was still in love with my dad, breaks my heart to not ever know if he loved her too or if he was just a gay man using her to cover up his real heart! She also contracted hiv.. thank God above she is living and the virus through her medication is undetectable!
@@thetravelgoods2760 Thanks for sharing your story 🙏
Even when you ask they won’t tell you the truth
Amen!!! Amen!! Amen!! Kari Lane 💯 agree with your comment sis.
A
Even though he showed signs🪧 … I’m not placing blame/ being judgemental, we all know what it’s like to be young and in love and dumb and look over shit… remember, she met this man at 20, an impressionable age… we as women need to show each other grace& understanding… lesson learned miss, you know what signs to look for in the future, be safe and peace and blessings on your journey 😘
I love this comment. I’m glad she saw it. Majority of things ppl are commenting she obviously knows now.
👍
So love this comment! Hit the nail on the head.💕
But it's older women doing the same
Yep
This just happened to me. Don’t think it doesn’t happen to white women. You will look back and see red flags. If he doesn’t pursue sex with you and wants a wardrobe that is more expensive than your’s, there is an issue. I noticed how my common law husband walked and he strutted. I think my ex is trans but I don’t know? Girl, it’s so scary and frustrating. My relationship lasted five years. I told my ex that it was ok for us to see other people, and he could live in our home. He still refused to tell me. Your ex’s best friend will never believe your ex was gay. It’s denial. This just happened to me and I don’t get it. These men will bad mouth us and talk sh@t about us, when we’re the supportive partners. I ran into the same problem. Every time I would tell him that I was talking to a male friend, he would go crazy. It makes us feel stupid and we’re not.
Yeah my ex was white but definitely in the closet. I found messages in his phone with a gay guy. So it happens to all of us love. You are right
😂😂😂
White people are way more liberal, open minded and accepting of homosexuality so incidence of DL spouse is lower in terms of percentage but of course much higher in terms of numbers. Ironically, having stronger religious belief leads to more incidence of tragic outcomes from dl behaviors.
I partially believe my ex is gay or bi. He told me he kissed another guy a few years before me to try it out and said it’s normal to be curious. I told him I never had confusion on that front and I always liked men. He tried to shame me about not being bicurious like he was. I just had weird suspicions about him.. he still hasn’t come out but I feel bad for any other woman he dated next. I feel like I dodged a bullet
You were his beard, sweetie. That is why he threatened to off himself if you left. He was a manipulator.
You don’t have to belittle her!
@@tblk1860 I don't think she was insulting her. That's literally what it's called when a gay man has a girlfriend/wife.
@@indiashante1560 'a gay man that has a wife/girlfriend'??? i dont think thats called gay! its Bi, if im not mistaken... please correct me.
@@coolrunnings1936 they mean when down low guy has a wife/girlfriend before he comes out
@@kusuoken5687 so he was gay all along, but he still smashed the chick? I'm confused bro. Don't gay men dislike women?
Sis....those flags werent red, those flags were BURNING !!!! I'm just glad that you got out when you did. Always, ALWAYS trust your gut feeling. 💯
I walked in on my ex with a transgender woman in my apartment 😩😩😩😩these down low men really be playing a dangerous game
I've always known I was into men, I always told gfs , I never hid it, there's way more of us than people realize I'm sure
Literally my exact story. I been dating my boyfriend for 6yrs I’ve literally found emails of him trying to sell his penis. I’m too afraid to be serious about confronting him and if i try to leave it’s always i love you blah blah. I think I’m in denial more than anything. I played this video aloud to see if he would say something and low and behold his question was “ what are you watching girl “ smh. My boyfriend is gay.
Get out please
😂 😂 😂 nothing wrong with being gay but if he’s in prostitution girl leave! He’s not financially grounded enough to secure a girlfriend and the worst part he can bring you a incurable disease
Just get rid,save yourself from more betrayal and lies. Meet up with your mom,sister, aunt,Nan for advice on what to do.
Your scared to leave but not scared to be told you have HIV. You are dumb. I guess you want to take a pill a day for the rest of your life. God blessed you that you found that email it is your sign to leave and you said your still in denial. Taking a pill everyday is exhausting and not easy not to mention the side effects but I guess that’s easier than leaving. God forbid you catch anything I don’t feel sorry for you.
How did your story unfold?
"Keep not thinking anything of it"... That was your intuition.... Always follow it! You'll never go wrong!
If you're husband starts wearing a skirt, that's your sign. If he had "suspect friends," that's also another sign. Us women take too much crap from men.
what type of skirt?
you can wear skirts without being gay lmfao?????
They don't know about Scottish men
Wearing a skirt is not a sign of being gay. Just like black women, gay men aren’t a monolith
Whats wrong with having gay friends. You can have gay friends and not be gay yourself, the same way gay people have stright freinds but arent going to turn strigh.
Please pray for me b/c I just found out my fiancé of 3 years and recently 2 twin 4 month old girls father is gay/bisexual or at these curious and want to try things sexually within both gender. I’m trying to b strong but I’m thinking I’m more in sick and in shocked that I was basically another cover( bc he does have another baby mama) for his denial of being D.L. But we literally was going to get married in 5 months, I’m graduating college and we were buying our first home in august. I happy that Ik this now rather then not filling my gut bc I could have caught anything and have it for the rest of my life or have to be treated but I literally just over came post and pre nental depression after giving him kids he wanted but later didn’t and now trying to be a better father/fiancé and now Ik why he was going through a lot of emotional anger and changes and confusion bc he got more than he wanted and not truly wanting to be “this” stuck with me and two kids but I’m leaving him rn as I type. Pray for me and my children (I even strongly know and feel my first child’s father gay or bi) he used to always try and do fight me pregnant with our kid and all for in and off and do drugs which I feel is a cover up. #dont date guys much older then u (who lie about their age major red flag) and #NEVER DATE IN ATL
We need to get back to judging righteously so these demons won’t be having field days with us…you should judge someone by what they wear, how they talk, how they act, what kind of music they listen to, who they hang around, their beliefs…etc. That’ll save you ALOT of time and pain moving forward! Thanks for sharing
There's so many men like this and it's very disturbing.
She ignored EVERY red flag. She talks about it like the signs WERE NOT COMMON SIGNS. This is why we have to allow others input. If you are in denial an outsider can definitely assure you of any doubts!
🎯🎯
7 years of denial. All the signs were there.
I was about to type this. Definitely not trying to victim blame or anything but sis got several clues alluding to the dude being gay. Your friends, the way he dressed, his dance moves (as seemingly unserious as it might sound), his ‘friends’… Like I don’t get. What else should’ve been done?
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Exactly lol I am always observant and that's why I feel I always pick up on alot of men who are gay but claim their straight. There's always something that's going to give him away
Literally going through the same thing right now 😭😭😭😭 when I say I can’t eat sleep get mad angry so many emotions in one lord I’m just trying to take it one day at a time
Makes me scared to date...Being single isn't bad at all!
At least y'all ain have no kids tied in this messs still very unfortunate tho
I feel bad for her but that duck was walking, talking and quacking from the beginning of their relationship.
Exactly
Trust me, There were definitely warnings. Often as women, we choose to ignore the signs. Be careful ladies!
Thank you for being transparent and sharing your story. Women need to hear this.
There is a rule of thumb that both me and my friends live by as it pertains to gay or DL men, “if we as women have to ever DOUBT a man’s sexual orientation (meaning not str8) then there is no reason to pursue anything further.” Every time me and my girls have had doubts about “str8” men who are gay or on the low we have been 100% right. This is simply off of DOUBT and DOUBT alone. Meaning we do not need to investigate or have evidence to substantiate that doubt. Our DOUBT alone will suffice and is more than enough!
💯
EXACTLY!!!
Sameeeee! If the smallest doubt comes
To mind, usually there’s shit
Going on. Energy does not
Lie
Right because a heterosexual man don’t give you doubts regardless of what type of guy he is.
LONG BUT HOPEFULLY YOU READ IT. I hope my story also helps someone.
My ex (when I was in my mid 20s) the first thing I saw was a text message. It was a link to a gay porn site. He said it was probably spam or something. I ignored it. As time went on my mom told me that my cousin told my dad that she believes my boyfriend at the time was gay. I was like “huh”? I’m like why didn’t she communicate to me about it? I’m the type of person if you tell me something I should watch out for, I’m going to investigate, I won’t get upset bc you told me. That means you’re watching out for me. Then while we were at a family gathering, my aunt had the nerve to say in front of everyone, “Yep so and so told me he was gay”. I’m like seriously? Wtf? You couldn’t talk to me in private? You had to say this in front of the entire family? Honestly my aunt had some nerve bc her husband was doing a lot of women in town and gave her chlamydia!
Anyways, I did more searching, got into his Facebook. Then BAM! I saw messages between him and this guy who we actually went to high school with. Talking about “When are we going to meet again?” “You might want to get an AIDS test.” “I know you want this duck again.” There’s so much more. I confronted him about it. Yes he denied it saying his cousin or someone was using his Facebook. Like seriously?! Child bye. I found out about all of this information the day before my birthday.
I will say this I always got checked for STDS/AIDS/HIV when I was with him, never caught anything. Let me tell you God watched out for me. Till this day (I’m in my 30s) no diseases. Even though this was a long time ago I’m still thankful I’m disease free bc some things pop up later. I’m highly blessed. He was cheating on me with men and women! To make it worse he was mentally and physically abusive and a stalker. God has completely covered me.
It baffles me how someone could hurt someone by not only cheating but damn on the down low! All these diseases going on out here? Hell no! Be smart ladies.
I’m so glad you’re okay ❤️
They are on the down low because of all the homophobia in our community.
@@plastichouselady That doesn't give them the right to use and waste peoples time. If they want to live that down low life, leave women alone.
I went thru the same exact thing. 3 years. Im glad you made it out. Fr fr
Me too! I was a straight spouse married to a down-low old man..smh. IT WAS HELL! Glad I got out of that jacked-up mess of a so-called marriage.
I love your tone and vibe, it crazy how the down low guys be having the most patient and understanding women. Ain’t no way in hell my ex would’ve been that cool about the situation lol. I’m feeling her a lot!!!
Sorry this happened to you! Thank you for your courage and strength to share this story with the world, and for that, you are an amazing, beautiful, young woman inside and out!
He sounds like a terrible person. He wanted to have his cake and eat it too. I'm glad you are out of that toxic situation.
I don't think he wanted her cake,the problem was he wanted to eat his friends cake. Gay or straight,that's fucked up. Some would disagree,but being gay,i needed something concrete to prove to myself that girls weren't my thing. So my personal test was a "Make out" session. That's it. Black and white. Didn't go further. This was in college. I remember specifically the girl being pissed at me because i wouldn't go further,the ho,lol. But i knew then i wouldn't wanna hurt her or myself if we went further. It's alot... alot and complex.
@@beautoxxbeautoxx so was he gay or bi? I'm confused here. 😕
@@coolrunnings1936 sexuality is interesting and hard to pinpoint exactly at times. But the way she's explained about how her friends comments before and during their relationship and then finding out it was going on since before they got married only points to him leaning more towards gay side. I believe he didn't want to face his reality by acknowledging and screwing up what he had as far as the " idea of normal" in his eyes. Either way, he was cheating, cheaters suck. Lucky for her she's still young,no kids, intelligent and gorgeous. I'm sure she'll be extra cautious and extra communicative with her next relationship that I'm sure she'll have no problem finding.❤️
Yep
I heard that expression this morning by psychic reader and I didn't know the meaning of it. But I've been suspecting him going the other way but didn't get confirmation from him claiming to be anti-gay and being offended by me. I think it was more implying him still dealing with his wife even they were not living together...
This is why it's important to be honest with the person that you claim that you love.
Love in a friend way not necessarily intimate/emotional. But it's NICE to be be honest all was.
Yes, and the first person to be honest with is ourselves. Everything flows from there.
Mama always said don't put nothing pass no man!
Ladies we try to play blind and the signs is right there!!!👀
I pray God deliver the undercover brothers!
Sis, your skin is so glowing and beautiful! You need to make a video about skincare tips, pretty please! 😍
I'm struggling with breakouts and hyperpigmentation! 🙏🏿
Man I'm beginning to think that Most guys are downlow or at least bi-curious just from the stories I keep hearing. If there's 10 men in the room 7 of them have had some type of secret homosexual experience or at least thought about in their lifetime. If I could prove it I would put money on it. Not All men but I'm sticking to most. It's scary, glad you got out..
They are, just like a lot of women are, they just can't be open about it do to societal standards unfortunately.
Too scary
@@TarotGirlTah444 not true at all , where’s your proof “a lot of men or women are bisexual I Wana see fr
@carly rhonda that's the stupidest shit I've ever heard. You sound scarred.
@carly rhonda so do you think this way about your father? What about Your grandpa? Yeah you sound like you’ve been with a DL dude too many times. Not all men like other guys 🍆
Sometimes a feminine man is attracted to your masculine qualities (confidence, strength, ambition, independence)
Those aren’t masculine qualities, lmfaoooo
@@FlowerTower everyone has feminine and masculine energy. What I listed are masculine attributes backed by science.
@@lafemme5716 you can't argue with illogical people, she probably doesnt even subscribe to gender roles.
effeminate. I agree.
@@lafemme5716 strength is the only scientific thing you listed lolll
I'm so sorry you went through that! Obviously, he was trying to tell you what was up without actually telling you. There are good, honest men out here who want a beautiful young lady. Please take time to heal, pray and trust God to bring the right one to you. 💜
You attract what you fear keep your mind elevated and level headed only think of what you want to manifest in your life or what you’re appreciative for
This is why rushing to get married by society standards can set you back.
That's for men and women
I think rushing to have sex is more of the issue, tbh. If we all could just control our sex drives a little better, we wouldn't feel the need to rush any type of romantic relationship.
I think it doesn’t matter if you rush or not a person will come out when they’re ready or get caught! A guy can disguise it soo well snd have a good enough reason for everything you suspect. It reminds me of straight men too in the sense that a man will disguise himself to be whatever you want him to be . Your “perfect” man just long enough to get what he wants or tired of the relationship then his true colors come out when he’s ready to show you that he was a con artist.
@@stephenanderson1594 I agree!
@@TheRibofJESUS I agree. I've been celibate for 7 months.
Here's a piece of loving advice from an OG especially to you millennials and gen z, y'all always say, "Don't judge me, " in which I find is counterintuitive because in real life we all need to be a good judge of one's character, and that will prevent you for placing yourselves in such deviant and deceptive situations.
Judgement is a necessary part of protection. If I see a drunk driver coming towards me, it’s not a bad thing to be judgmental and get my behind out of his path.
Ms. Dixon, I love and appreciate your comment.
This it right here 👏
Very well said! Thank you for saying it! ❤✊🏾👏🏽
Sometimes people won't listen to family, but the will listen to others. I will forward this to my daughters!
Yesss!!!💯
Appreciate your courage to share this!! I have heard stories like this b4 we gotta rebuke all the mess that breaks Copper woman..and their are simple tests that can help you see these sooner, and other gays can call em on the spot
Girl their were SOOOOOO many red flags…
Omg, I think you willingly turned a blind eye to say you had a man/ring. No way you could be that naive/unalert.
To all my sisters out there you gotta pray and fast to ask god to reveal to you who they truly are. Only god can save you from this bcuz the devil is behind most of these guys and the devil is the biggest deceiver. Words of wisdom
K.M.
Words of wisdom. SO TRUE!
Pretty much
Omg thank You 🙏🏼
Omg so true.When you pray to God he will deliver the righteous person.Only he can do that.
Fast
Just pay attention and don't second guess yourself. If it walks like a duck and it talks like a duck, it's a DUCK! If he does gay things, he's gay! If he's MIA, he's either with a woman or a man and either way you don't want him in your life. Pray and ask God to reveal to you who this person really is in a way that you can't deny what you saw and He will show you. Love yourself enough to not make excuses for someone else's BS. I'm a lot older than you are and I've seen a few things in my life.😏
👀
That part
100% agree with your comment Nora Smith.
fuck no. you can’t assume someone is gay because they don’t act stereotypical and just abandon them. that’s messed up.
Thank you Nora
I always say this! If you suspect him of being gay he's gay. I've never met an man I think is gay and he turns out to be straight. My intuition is always right. My gaydar is strong!
I applaud you for talking about this.
Most people I know would rather forget than share. This is helpful information to know.
My ex had this guy friend who he would lie and say he’s doing something else but he would really be with him, AND I heard another grown ass man say I LOVE YOU to him before he hung up and I was literally like what the fuck, and this man had a group chat where EVERYTHING was gay, and back then ppl shrugged that off like “oh that’s what friends do” I always thought ts was so weird and he kinda confirmed that by going out his way to tell me he wouldn’t respond to this but he was ALWAYS in his phone .
I am so happy I’m not with him
That gut feeling is ALWAYS on point 😩
Always
A L W A Y S !!!!
Facts, mine was!!!!!!!!!
Yeap
I’m going through this right now…can’t wait to share my story one day. Never thought I’d deal with this…but it is now one of my many testimonies.
Please share, praying you get out of it fast!
Girl... please just tell him to love who he wants and you should too. He needs to love himself. But with the stigma of being gay goes way far so I pray for him. I will! :)
Girl it is not that deep how you women make it seem 🙄🤣🤣
@@johnsonjohnson9389 u have to think about both sides tho nobody should be forced to come out but it’s unfair on both parties as the woman has prob fell in love with the man and so when the man says he gay and he doesn’t love them like that obv it’s gonna hurt
@@j_zz ofc but for her to act like shes been a victim of a crime is kind of to much for me … yes he probably wasted her time but even if he was of bisexual she would of still left him. People act like men cant experience also 🙄😩
All I'm hearing is "I saw ALL the red flags and still choose to ignore it" I don't have anything in me to tell u type of ladies!! Because to me Lil Uzi is down low so for u to say he dressed like Lil Uzi and his mannerisms were 'cute' GIRL!!!!!!!!
Giiiirl, I can relate 1000%. I went through the same thing with my ex. A month into our relationship I found out he was cheating on me and had been sexting/ FaceTiming multiple men on a dating app. He completely denied being bi/gay and I forgave him for it. Our relationship was filled with arguments about it until it ended 10 months later. After we broke up I found out he was back on the app doing the same thing he did when we were together. Needless to say he was lying and so deeply in denial he got me to believe all of that. Such a fcked up situation. To play and manipulate the person you claim to love like that…smh. But thank God it ended when it did. If there’s one thing I learned is always listen to your gut and intuition because it’s usually always right!!
Your intuition is a God given gift. PERIOD!
Nah. I been through the same thing. Said that same thing. Said I’d support someone doing the same thing. But when someone replied and lied to me?? Then proceeded to put hands on me and my child mind you, I was going through breast cancer, surgery, and treatment. Mind you, I have always paid for everything, including his own three children who, he did not care to pay attention to; the least that MFA should have done was be honest, knowing he had support in his corner. The moment he did not? Ain’t nothing right about that. I am not responsible, nor is anybody for their insecurities, or what they feel they have to hide. At the same time, I am aware of these things, and if I bring them up; I am mentioning my support in the matter. If you go beyond that and do the absolute worst, anybody can think of? I’m sorry, people like that don’t deserve any sympathy.
These are some narcissists, psycho/sociopathic dudes. Ain’t no space for that, Especially when they have had every opportunity to be honest upfront
Ain’t no advice to give. A real man, straight or not with still be straight up with us. Because at the end of the day, their intention should not be to manipulate nor hurt a female who they wrapped up because of their insecurities, and, their manipulation tactics. I think the most important thing is for women in the situation to understand is, if all we hear his words, but see no action? Drop them. ASAP before it gets worse.
I can't help but think if he was trying to harm himself every time you tried to leave was because he internalized what was pushing you away. I'd like to think that's a sign he cared about how his actions affected you and that he was genuinely conflicted with himself over the entire situation. Hope you both are in better places today. God bless you for sharing your experiences.
I really don’t understand how someone can live a second life with no remorse at all. Even the straight men, this is another level though. Live in your truth because the truth is always revealed.
She knew he was gay but went with the flow. Her story tells much more about her thinking process than the gay guy.
@@multyz1 Many women who have lived this can't understand how he could want her and be gay
@@misslove7698 Do these women have to take any responsibilities for not being much more observant and cautious or it's all the gay guys fault?
@@multyz1 lol
@Tayonna's Turn the first thing black women need to realise and embed into their brain is that "not everyone thinks like you, has the same moral conduct as you and cares the way you do" once you Overstand that,
all that "I Don't understand how/I could never do that" rhetoric becomes irrelevant and you focus on the facts, your own intuition and what the person does. Not what they say and this goes beyond the topic of this video - this goes for LIFE
One thing I learned is that you don’t have to judge a person if they are your friend but you have to judge when your dating sadly
My Lord, you are beautiful, your soul and your exterior! Saying this in the straightest way possible. 🤣 blessing to you, thank you for sharing!
I’m glad you’re safe girl bc sometimes these things end BAD!!! A disease hell even death for finding this out. These men are a trip
Atleast you didnt stay for 10 yrs and have 2 kids because you were trying to be "nice" and non judgemental. Whew ty for this! I only had 1 Friend who knew of my suspicions at the time and we stopped being friends. I think if I wasn't so embarrassed to talk about my feelings to my family or other friends I would have left along time ago. It's always good to follow your intuition. I will never doubt myself or people please again ever.
My family still till this day doesn't believe me when I try telling them my ex-huband was/is dl--because he's a very masculine "looking" Nigerian. But sometimes it's the "masculine looking" homophobics.
What made you think he was gay ?? I’m just curious because I just came back from Ghana and they are seriously in denial about Ghanaians/Africans in general can be gay . A lot of them are oblivious to the thought that ones can be gay over there. But I spotted a good bit of suspect activity personally 🥴😅
Truth told!!!
@ Stacie Greene Who say Africans are all in denial of gay men? You people love generalizing Africans as naive and speaking on our behalf 🙄 how ludicrous..
I’m Nigerian and I know there are gay African men. I met my first gay boy in grade school and I just knew right away. I guess it was the holy spirt,, cause 11 years later I meet a mutual friend who confirms that he is openly gay and dates men.
There are gay African men and many people are aware. It’s just repressed and not openly discussed because of religion, culture, laws, etc..,
In Nigeria we’ve even had secx workers and journalists expose politicians for being dl.. so many people are aware. Don’t speak on what you don’t know..
@@co7513 My sister or brother ... I said “I recently got back from GHANA” !!! I didn’t mention Nigerians at all. So you inserted yourself in a conversation that wasn’t even about your country. I don’t generalize countries in Africa...I can only speak about where I have been and the things I have seen and heard with my own eyes and ears.
Also it’s funny how you say “you people” , and I’m the only person who offended you. So what ?? Now you don’t like ALL African Americans 😂. Hypocrite !!
@@co7513 And instead of being so quick to respond... actually READ what you are responding to . That would help a lot my friend .
Same thing happened to me!!!! I broke his nose cause he laughed when I asked if he messed with my son. To the curb ASAP. Text in his phone said “come see what these glory holes are all about.” Woke his ass up like wtf is this. It was on from that moment. Liars are the worst but a gay one??!! Naww he got me confused with a willing beard. 🤬
Im so sorry u went thru this and never doubt ur intuition again! Being manipulated and lied to is never okay! I just also wanted to add that there’s also plenty of straight men who put their hands on women as well, so I just feel like that went towards his character and not really towards the fact he’s gay
He did so much to mask the reality of what was actually taking place. Why not just be completely honest about how he was truly feeling...
You're completely right about that.
People lie when they are in the wrong. Simple. Let's stop expecting realness from liars.
It's hard to accept something you're ashamed of..
How did he mask it, she said she saw it in his dressing and feminine behavior from the beginning. There were multiple incidents before they even married so she isn’t completely free of being accountable for going through this.
Exactly