How Body Dysmorphia Took Over My Life | Roundtable
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- Опубліковано 12 вер 2024
- In this episode of Roundtable we hear from 6 people who have struggled with body dysmorphic disorder (BDD).
They share their stories of developing BDD, connection between BDD and other mental health issues as well as eating disorders, the difference of experiencing BDD for men and women and how they managed to find a way to deal with it all.
If you’re struggling with any issues covered in this episode, you might find helpful info here:
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Thanks to Danny, Carla, Mia, George, Charlie and Millie for taking part!
Carla:
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Danny:
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George:
You can find out more at MyoMinds.com
Mia:
Follow her on Instagram @me_myself_and_mental_health
Millie:
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Charlie:
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I’ve hated my face for as long as I’ve known. I constantly feel like I’m being looked at and laughed at when I’m out in public and it’s gotten so bad recently that I’ve been struggling to even leave the house.
Thank you for posting this and spreading awareness
me too :( and i’m only 15 almost 16 and i have zero self confidence and am so insecure w my face everyday. i can’t bear how people see me and i cry almost everyday
@@xoxobellabooxoxo I’m so sorry you are struggling too. I’ve actually spoken to my doctor and they are referring me to a psychologist for BDD.
You are still so young so it will be hard for you to tell, but if it is extremely bad maybe you should talk to your doctor. The younger you are, the easier it will be 🤍 good luck.
@@Babeeeyxoxothank you so much! I also struggle with horrible ocd and obsessive thoughts that also seem to take over most of my days with this dysmorphia I might have :( it’s so sad and discouraging and i’m afraid i’m never going to be happy or confident
@@xoxobellabooxoxo dont loose confidence dear i too have BDD iam 24 year old woman, i have suffered but never gave up as long as we never give up we will lead a better life , Visit doctor as soon as possible may be CBT can help you, my only advice don't let BDD take control over that's the biggest mistake i did.
i'm a male with bdd, but i'm actually not the most conventionally attractive. you are genuinely very conventionally attractive. i can't imagine why you would think people are looking at you weird on the street. i can't imagine how disorientating it must be to be as attractive as you but still struggle with these thoughts. disorientating seems like such a great word to describe BDD in general for me. it's such a complex disorder and getting lost in the complexity of it all is a huge part of what makes it so challenging to deal with.
Before even watching this video, you have no idea how much the fact that this video is posted on this chamnel means to me. I struggled with bdd for at least 10 years and its been hell. Noone truly knows what its like. I always respected Ladible and the fact that you guys made a video on this means so much Im actually crying..
I agree
I understand I myself have struggled with specifically muscle dysmorphia which is different and worse sometimes bec everyone expects your doing amazing mentally bec your jacked. Now I’m in college and I’m running a study with a PhD student on muscle dysmorphia and anxiety, depression, and loneliness
I am struggling severely with this right now , specifically with my face , it is terrifying , absolutley terrifying .
me too :( everyday and i’m only 15
I'm in my late 20s and although there are certain triggers (some of which i learned to avoid throughout the years) it does finally seem to get better. Your face is so close to your identity and you can't really hide it, which is why I think bdd focused on your face is particularily hard. Please don't give up trying to be kind to yourself and look for distraction on bad bdd days
Me too since high school, became so serious since 6 years i m 24 year old now, i wasted beautiful part of my life bcz of bdd .
Me too its awful and exhausting 😢
Me too
As someone who has been struggling with this ugly disorder for as long as I can remember, I really want to hug all these people. I know how dark of a place this is. They’ve probably spent many, many years waiting and wanting to be this raw and open about what they’ve been battling. It’s also somewhat relieving to see other people struggle with this in such a severe way; yet it’s bittersweet because I surely wouldn’t wish this on anyone. Not even an enemy. The amount of years, relationships, and opportunities stolen from me and many others because of this disorder is truly heartbreaking. It feels like such a dark cloud is lingering over you and life is in black and white. It’s something no one can truly understand unless you’ve gone through it yourself. An absolute nightmare.
Even i am in same condition I sometimes can't able to do anything i just feels i am ugly
@@DakshPratap-qh3cn I’m so sorry you feel that way :( it’s hard for me to sit here and tell you you’re beautiful because I know what this is like and nothing I or anyone says is going to change that. But, the best advice I can give you is focus more on giving to others to take attention off yourself and your appearance. Life is too precious to spend it hours in front of a mirror picking yourself apart. Try and prioritize your personality and the love you have in your heart to give to people. Sometimes that’s my biggest motivation and all I feel I have to offer to get me through the darkest times and midst of a bad BDD flare up. 💜
@@CassidyJoyner I don't actually know I am beautiful or not because a lot of people's found me much attractive with beard except me
@@CassidyJoyner anyway thanks man but I have found a solution for it
The saddest part of it all is how remarkably attractive all of these people are, both physically and emotionally; I'm so inspired by their strength and self-awareness.
Massive respect to these men and women for talking about something so difficult, stay healthy people 🙏🏾
Every single one of these people is incredibly brave for putting themselves and their most vulnerable moments into the public forum.
I struggle massively with my body and hearing this has given me hope that I can accept myself and maybe heal.
Outstanding content, deeply moving and very powerful.
Thank you, all of you, for your honesty and incredible desire to talk about this incredibly harmful condition.
BDD is a branch off of OCD (so is compulsive hoarding). When the compulsions and distorted obsessions take over your life it can be devastating. Videos like this are so important because there are so many people who suffer from this, and it can be managed with proper treatment, medication and therapy. Asking for help is absolutely essential as its such an isolating disorder.
Yeah, these people are very obsessive. It's sad to see
BDD and OCD can be considered related but BDD is not a branch of OCD in the sense of being a subtype of OCD, which is a common misunderstanding. It is its own separate diagnosis.
BDD as a teenager is honestly a weird and crappy experience. Everyone seems to be spreading body positivity and confidence and it makes you feel so bad for not being confident or loving the way you look. Sometimes I have good moments where i think I look okay but then such low lows where I'm body checking constantly and crapping on my appearance. I honestly dont even know what to do anymore it's really tiring and mentally draining to avoid mirrors but also want to check them everyday.
BDD as ruined my entire life! Mine mainly affects my face. Robbed me of becoming a mother, a partner, making friendships, going on holiday, even he most simple things.. i am now nearly 47 and its worse than ever because now aging has worsened my illness. CBT was absolutely useless for me. I cant afford surgery but had a lot of fillers which helped but only ever so slightly. In my personal opinion only surgery could help me its to deeply ingrained in me. I am now completely housebound and only go to appointments with full makeup, sunglasses, umbrellas, masks, hoods.. whatever l can hide under! Not even my closest family has seen me without a full face of makeup. It will eventually kill me I'm sure of that. I even constantly receive abuse because l wear sunglasses if its raining or dark and use umbrellas on a dry sunny day. Its a cruel horrible and misunderstood illness that not even most doctors understand or have any compassion for. There is just no help out there 😢
☹💓💓💓
I feel for you.. 36 been dealing with it my whole life and it's mentally crippling..
I'm a smart person but When you're constantly thinking about something it takes away a lot of your cognitive abilities in the moment..
I feel like no one really knows me.
Hi there,you are now only 2 yrs older than I was when I overcame BDD,I am 51 now and 6 yrs almost BDD free,well I still get some of the feelings but I can manage them actively.You are certainly not too old to change but will need very specialised help and a huge amount of courage to persist with treatment.
I was suicidal intermittently for almost 27 yrs,no partner,no friends ,minimal wage job,housebound much of the time outside work,dreadful existance as you described. I too had several cosmetic surgeries but never satisfied and probably 10 seperate attempts at psych treatment before I bit the bullet and spent 5 months in the specialist residential unit in the bethlem hospital in London for anxiety and trauma.It was a fucking nightmare for me to stick with the treatment plan but my persistance paid off and something clicked after 12 wks in ,I started to see myself as more than a deformed nose ,that I could tolerate extreme shame and anxiety and not avoid people and eventually or rather suddenly by behaving in accordance with these alternative beliefs it actually changed my perception of myself and the world and guess what,I didnt see the same thing in the mirror much of the time and certainly didnt have that nauseating feeling I used to get.My core beliefs surrounding the importance of appearance had been eroded by constant daily guided exposure therapy,debriefing,cognitive restructuring and peer support/often pressure .I owe my life to that clinic and believe I needed that intensity of treatment and immersion in a group with a comon purpose to get better.Since then my father and younger sister have both died suddenlyand my wife of 10 yrs left me due to her own mental illness but I still didnt relapse into BDD and when I felt myself slipping,I killed it dead immediately by acting opposite to what the BDD made me want to do,which is too hide away.You should seriously look into this option of residential specialist treatment if you want to live without the constant pain.Thats officially the longest youtube response Ive ever writen.
I’m so sorry it’s truly a horrendous mental illness
@@scarred10I’m so sorry
I was told by my therapist and psychiatrist that I have BDD. I struggle with believing it. Some days I do and some days I don’t. Some days I cry when seeing my reflection and some days I can handle it. It’s devastating and debilitating. My body is misshapen to me. It’s wrong. It’s heavy. I hate my breasts, thighs, and butt the most. All the things that make me a “woman” by mainstream. I hate it.
that sounds so extremely exhausting, mentally taxing, and just like a full time job tbh. so long as your body can breathe, move, digest, protect, think etc, your body is not wrong. its functioning as it should; its designed as a capsule for us to live in. nothing more. with everyone telling us what discerns us as 'women', we cant reduce ourselves down to womanhood being the way we look. i hope you find some peace, comfort, and acceptance in your body. im so sorry if these words havent helped or anything either. but hopefully you can one day come back to this comment and want to hug your past self, i just wanna jump thru the screen and give you a big hug!!! everything is going to be alright, its not your fault, and youre doing the best you can. try and take it easy
@@letsparchmentitupyo7566 what ever you said is so true , I can sense ur empathy support that you want to provide to a stranger but frankly this words will never help with BDD sufferers, body functionality is important we all know yet still we all have obsessive thoughts about looks..just for information, I think it's best for them to go to CBT it may help a little.
What's your BMI? Do you exercise? Would highly recommend weight lifting. It's mostly ignorance and misinformation that people have.
As a male, first minutes i saw these 3 men and find them handsome, would never though about them having this difficulty.
This is terrifying cause we don't even see ourself the proper way and the others would never notice our difficulty unless we're talking about it.
And as a male, we compare each other TOO MUCH and we don't even have ideas about others peoples difficulties and with Body Dysmorphia we clearly don't have an objective vision of ourselves ... This is murderous.
The same here
I feel like it is a form of narcissism, because what I can see, only people who have absolutely normal faces seem to be obsessed about it. It's strange really.
I am 30 and have recently been diagnosed with BDD. I have missed out on so many opportunities over the years and have struggled to maintain close friendships. It's a huge relief to know that I am not alone, although I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy! I just want everyone to know that it CAN be treated with the right therapy AND therapist! Not all therapists are a good fit. I have seen multiple psychologists and counsellors that were no help to me. But now I have an amazing clinical psychologist who just gets it. I have modules that I go through each week, and I have noticed a HUGE improvement in my mental health. Although I have a long way to go, I am certainly hopeful! Just know that it can and WILL get better! I'm here if anyone needs to chat 💛
Good for you but do not count on any therapist to be the right fit,the evidence based therapy is well known but you just have to persist in the face of very uncomfortable emotions while doing that therapy ,it may take years and several different therapists.
I got bullied by my own sister for about 10 years in front of my friends as well as when it was just her and me. She constantly made jokes about my smaller chest to a point where I wanted to die because I felt like the biggest walking flaw. I didnt feel worthy of love and thought all men were going to be disappointed by my body.There were many men who tried to get to know me better but I avoided love and romantic relationships until I was in my mid-twenties because I was terribly embarrassed and scared to show my body. I was miserable for 20 years. I am in my mid-thirties now and in a stable relationship. I am in therapy for a couple of years. I am doing much better. But still to this date, I am still convinced my body was nature's mistake and I suffer on a daily basis.
Please think twice before you shame someone else's body. It may have a detrimental effect on a person.
I am so bad that it really shocks me with the girls that are wearing tank tops in the videos or showing so much of their body or tight fitting clothes. I have always wore bigger clothes than what I normally wear. It’s odd I don’t know where it came from but I do know my family was very critical and always pointing out my flaws instead of just telling I’m beautiful the way I am!
Society just doesnt understand how serious this mental illness is
True
I started to have this terrible mental illness at age 14, it's very draining I really wanted to die. I'm 51 now and still have it but it's not so extreme than when I was younger. Still struggling, it's funny how some days I feel fine and others not so much, I also have social anxiety and depression. I feel so much for people that have this.🙁
I’m really loving this round table series, there’s so many fascinating stories that has been told so far during this series
When I was younger, I’d always love to buy fashion magazines and browse through the pictures and admire the clothes and how chic the models look.
My dad would walk past me and point at the models and say “that’s what women SHOULD look like”
He’d do the same with movies I’d watch- he’d pause and focus on a still frame and say the same thing: “a woman should have this, that. That’s how a REAL woman is built.”
I didn’t quite understand it at the time, because I was around 12 but as I got older it got progressively worse.
I think that’s what triggered mine.
I’ll never forget it.
That's horrible!
I hate when adults fail their children, some people don't stop to think that they should keep some things to themselves AT LEAST.
I Hope you're doing better now but hell, my body image problems come from a similar place, from comparing myself to the "ideal, real women".
@@jaylicious4694true i hate adults who behave crazy before children, adults need to me more mature keep certain to themselves
No disrespect to your dad but that’s so disrespectful of him. I went through similar with my dad. He would always tell me that he cursed me with his broad shoulders. It’s made me self conscious about them growing up.
I'm sorry but what an asshole
That's awful and sounds kinda abusive
You are all very attractive and sweet and kind human beings. Just proves how intense this illness is. Have been suffering since 13 years of age. Glad to hear you guys are all coming out the other side now. I am almost there now too
Never judge a book by it's cover, because they look alright from a distance
Just said this to someone just yesterday, for this very reason.
“They look alright from a distance”? Wow 🙄
I think they meant it as in, they look well, they look like they don't struggle with anything - not 'they look good from a distance' - but still, it's hard not to read their book cover as 'How To Be A Twat' all the same...@@Jay41
Thank you so much for this!! I know other people deal with BDD, but hearing/seeing people tell such relatable stories helps me at least feel less alone with trying to deal with this disorder
Thank you to each of these people for sharing your stories. I’ve suffered from this as well, and it’s helpful to know I’m not alone.
Wishing you all lots of love
This is amazing seriously, thank you all for opening up about this! It is so important. Every human has BDD, believe it or not! The difference is the severity of the obsession. BDD is OCD. OCD is obsessing and using a compulsion or action to reduce associated anxiety and this is not eating disorder dependent as it can be any fixation such as work, education, eating etc... I had anorexia and bulimia growing up. It was a response to trauma surrounding me as I was homeless, bullied and abused at home too! The bullying was that bad, over 20 girls waited for me with knives. No joke. I felt the only thing I could do was waste away and the weight dropped off really fast. It didn't help with the neglect and ignorance of others about the disease. Anorexia and eating disorders are just a result of BDD and a traumatic response. It is not about vanity as the media would lie about. Some anorexia is a result of vanity but the majority is a response to abuse. Social media is the devil when it comes to BDD as this is a mirage, a false image portraying an idealised self. We are worth SO MUCH MORE than our appearance. We are here to love and love is not skin deep. Take care x
no anorexia is the result of vanity nor is BDD and anorexia isnt necessarily BDD or trauma,it is part genetic predisposition,part upbringing and experiences but not necessarily trauma.Certainly not everyone has either BDD or OCD,they only become those when you can no longer function in life .Your own personal experiences are not scientific evidence.
Everything is science and it is healthy to discuss the similarities and differences. Anorexia can be because of many reasons and so can BDD etc It depends what caused the trigger and why it became a coping mechanism for life Everyones story is unique :) @@scarred10
Dear wrong, Every Human has insecurities but insecurities alone not BDD, so not every human have BDD my friend is severely bullied about her looks by A class group in our school she did not developed BDD but had PTSD to high sounds , but her pain not invalid she suffered alot but does not have BDD meanwhile me got few negative comments on my looks but I became obsessive with those thoughts, i cry almost everyday spoiled my life because can't focus on other task, it's totally different it's hurts BDD suffers more if you say it's common since it sounds like we are crying for no reason.
Having BDD is so hard. It's really hard to cope. It drains our soul.
Thank you for making this video. I suffer from BDD. It is debilitating. 😢 You are all in my thoughts and prayers.
I am struggling with this even though I go to the gym multiple times a week and even though it’s been 4 months my love handles, stomach and lower chest fat will not budge. It feels like my body is plotting against me just to keep enough body fat to make me feel disgusted and just enough muscle to keep me In a constant loop of happiness from having a pump to absolute dread when I need to pass by a mirror. Hope everyone going through this the best, it’s not easy
No one’s got it figured out !!! The best sentence I’ve heard in years... that really helps me to see this perspective... and it’s so true !
The fact that when i watch this video and i would genuinely class all six people as being "conventionally attractive"/beautiful, hot or handsome in a lot of people's eyes, really shows how fucked this condition is. Literally never actually know how i genuinely look to other people
Its important to point out that this is not and individual but an social issue.
For people the who have friends, family and loved ones who are affected by BDD;
keep strong, educate yourself for their help and support on their BDD issues and also don’t feel powerless and unhelpful.
Myself speaking from experience of a loved one who is recovering from BDD, it was and still is tough when you feel helpless. Help is available and don’t be afraid to ask for it
Xxx
Im almost 5o. I have had body dysmorphia and disordered eating since I was 8 yrs old. This video is so helpful for my husband and myself. Thanks for posting.
🙏🏽💕Thank you for EVERYONE’s courage and transparency 🙏🏽💕
I've really bad BBD after I had someone in school tell me that I should be bulimic until I die. I look in the mirror and don't see pretty. He will never k ow what scars he has caused me to have.
I‘m glad they did not suceed in taking their lifes🙏🏽 thank you for sharing you are all true fighters
It’s interesting because they’re all really good looking.
This is the thing that makes me a little upset. This happens to people who are also unattractive, and people who were previously attractive become unattractive due to the toll that stress and depression takes on the body. I damaged my nose trying to make it look more symmetrical. It's painful knowing that you used to be attractive enough, but wasn't aware, and are now unattractive and there is nothing you can do about it and it is your fault as well.
@@PoopEaterFromMars I’m really sorry about that.
We do not believe that about ourselves. BDD makes you think you are the scum of the earth.
I got breast enhancement for disfigurement at 17 and was bullied for different things. I’m turning 27 now and it’s getting so bad I don’t really want to live anymore. I’m in a great relationship, but I keep comparing myself to his exes who are 10 times prettier than I would ever be no matter how hard I work out or whatever. He is also quite fixated on his looks and seeing what kind of women he likes makes me feel inadequate. I’m tired, and I can’t do this much longer.
how are things now? and out of curiosity.. are his looks a significant factor in why you're with him?
Stay strong love ❤ you are worth it 🙏🏽
Pretty sure I have bdd and cptsd due to the constant bullying/teasing throughout my life. I use to think if I cleared my skin I would feel accepted but that didnt work. A recent rejection has sent me spiraling...I can't go anywhere without a face mask. People might think there is something wrong with me but I sometimes rather that than being judged on something I can't change (my face).
May the universe bless you all - this helped me so much today 💓
I needed this episode. I have begun not eating again... and to the point past feeling humgry. I have just started losing weight and had to tighten my belt by a notch thus far. This is a strong reminder of the severity of where I have been. Jesus has healed all if my wounds and self-inflicted negative patterns. I have 5 disorders on paper and at least 2 that are not diagnosed. I stopped going to doctors years ago because they kept stamping labels in my file. Im so glad she spoke freely about the power of finding God in your life. I dont know if i will ever have a full length mirror in the house again, but I am okay with that. I am healthier than i have ever been. I am grateful to not hate everything about myself inside and out. Jesus taught me the meaning of Love. Especially in loving myself.
Remember, He loves you, He wants you to come to Him. He wants to know you. He wants to heal you.
This made me cry so much
Respect to them for speaking about it
The tricky part is accepting that life isn't fair in the gifts that we are given. So many of us stubbornly rebel against the facts. I am an older person and have observed that those people with the best relationships are not classified as good looking. What makes the difference is inner confidence... Typically from how you were treated as a child and whether you were taught how to respect and stand up for yourself
I'm 14 and I have been dealing with this for more than four years... I just feel so ugly. I don't think I deserve love or anyone. I really wish I looked better.. A boy online said he has genuine feelings for me and I feel like he deserves someone way better... I don't wanna lose him but at the same time, he doesn't know that I'm too ugly for him. I just can't change the way I think about myself. I get so defensive when someone tires clicking photos of me. I start crying when I look at the photos taken of me. I just want to be pretty 😔
i feel you girl, im constantly ignoring taking pics as much as possible.❤
Hey I'm one of the women in this video. Trust me you are not ugly. You deserve the world. If any man rejects you it's a fault on his part, not yours. You will find the right person, you are still super young!
I define BDD as feeling disgusted and unattracted towards certain features of your body and the refusal to accept that as part of yourself. It puts an ever-present weight on your life that keeps you begging for a safe space.
I describe it as feeling an "ick" across my face or other undesirable parts. It's like a toxic cloud that bubbles over my skin and I feel it. I can't make eye contact with others and I feel anxious being in photos. I can't wear short sleeve shirts or pants, or take off my shirt at the beach. I almost panic when at the doctors/dentist office, and forget about relationships or your first kiss, that lifestyle is for other people to enjoy. I just want my own little space where I can feel in control and do what I love, but even that's apparently selfish of me. It stops me from being able to live or be enthusiastic about the rest of my life. It doesn't help that I was neglected as a child. Trauma runs deep, but for all that, I feel like I could move forward if it weren't for the lingering problem of BDD that brings it all back to the surface. Solitude and the place our minds go to.
For me it wasn't about how I looked, I mean it did start with wanting to get rid of the pot belly my boyfriend teased me about which made me feel gross and unwanted, but it became a way to exert some control in a life that felt all out of my control. I couldn't control how I was treated, but I could control what I ate and didn't eat, and the less I ate the more successful and in control I felt. It was a daily challenge to eat less than the previous day, and I listed each thing. I also felt like, as an object in the world, my physical form took up too much space, and that my form should be much much smaller than a 5'9' human. I felt I should be the size of a grain of rice. I guess that's how important I felt. I actually wanted to fade away to nothing and quietly disappear. I had two bouts of this, once as a teen, and again during my divorce, when it was accompanied by nausea making it literally impossible to eat much of anything. I went down to size 6, and a AA bra cup, almost boney, not quite, my hair was falling out and had stopped growing, and my nails flaked, and two of my molars rotted through.
Jeez I'm so sorry about that and i definitely get what you mean by control. It feels like appearance is like a cheat code to lifes greatest offers sometimes. I think your boyfriend wasn't right for that teasing though, teasing is harmful even for those who don't have bdd. Words can get in your head.
dealing w another severe bout of bdd the last year and its making me not want to be alive. its so draining. i cant imagine being this way forever 🥺
I totally have this literally getting an appointment tomorrow.
I spend so much time fixating on how I look and worrying about aspects of my appearance. If I think about I look it makes me cry and there have been times I’ve been out shopping and have had to rush home because I’m too embarrassed to be seen.
I've never experienced being as bad as those in the video but I do understand how miserable and extremely obsessed with appearances.
I remember when I was a teenager, I got bullied a lot for my appearance and probably where it started, particularly when I got braces.
The first obsession was my weight. I loved playing my dance mat at the time and played it a lot to the point where I lost half a stone in a week or 2. I was obsessed with the scales, weighing myself every day and waiting for the weight to go down. I got really bad to the point where I weighed about 6 and a half stone and felt ill eating half a banana.
I then got obsessed with my teeth. Again I got bullied for that even after my braces got taken out especially as I had an overbite. I stopped looking after my teeth and was in a bit of a depressive phase where I couldn't care less about them. I then developed issues like fillings and erosions etc. My dentist was evidently ashamed of me and that made me feel shame that I hadn't looked after them and trying to get them "perfect" again. I was checking my mouth constantly, got really anxious, thinking everyone was looking them and couldn't really interact with people properly as I kept covering my mouth. It only got better when I met my ex, who encouraged me to speak without covering my mouth and tried to boost my esteem with complimenting me.
Fast forward 10 years, I still feel I get glimpses of dissatisfaction with my appearances, like skin pinching, looking at my pores and fine lines developing. It's so exhausting and I feel that when you're finished with one obsession, another creeps up.
I honestly think that a lot of industries are to blame for people's deep insecurities. Magazine and newspaper companies, movies and tv shows (especially reality tv) with picking people with model features, modelling industry, makeup industry, skin care industry, fitness industry, dental industry, social media in general, filters etc. All of that is to blame. It's marketing to make profits on people's insecurities.
One word: capitalism.
Not me thinking this only applied to actual unattractive people..
Seeing these normal looking people suffering from the same illness as me gives me hope that maybe I look normal too
You do and you are valid
Thought that was Martin Odegaard on the thumbnail 😂
Problem with bdd it's triggers that can start you of.like one day see self in mirror with sunlight and it starts you of ..problem is I've neglected my looks because of bdd and not looking in mirror .I'm torn between looking in mirror obsessively or not looking at my apprence.social media really makes difficult to function.
The fact is all of them are extremely beautiful 😕
Thank you! That is super sweet. We never feel like it unfortunately.
Thank you so much for sharing your story, you are helping a lot of people like me 🙏
I'm 40, haven't left my barley at all in 23 years, its been 4 yearscsonce I even stepped one foot outside, I have severe scarring alopecia from lupus since age 17 with plaques and pistuals and small cysts and lesions, and over the years I tried every remedy and medicine treatment you could imagine and 3x in 7 years I ended up with 2nd and 3rd degree chemical burns over my entire scalp that took 4 months to heal and was excruciating discomfort even after the burning phase went away after about 5 days first it felt like severe sunburn then it all turns into super tight scabs on my entire head on top of already being diseased chronically and I was on finastwride and rogain which I spent any extra little money o had on that never worked and ended up developing paradoxical hypertrichosis allover my upper body I look like a freak because of it all bald since 18 with scarring and scabs and lesions and plaques and trying to hide it all with hats which I developed severe depression and anxiety from I haven't looked in mirror in 17 years and I have to shower in the dark and cover all my windows with blackout curtains now my teeth are all falling out I have 12 left I'm 5-10 155 and before all this I was very popular in HS and was never single and dated the cheerleaders and rich girls and I played piano and ice hockey I loved school I stay in my childhood bedroom 24 hours a day 365 -10 min shower each day and eat ramen everyday I order from eBay with my direct express card from Ssi my parents are sick and dirt poor our combined income for 3 people is 24k a year and my parents are nearly 70 and both drug addicts and spend a lot! Of $$ in marijuana and chewing tobacco cigarette and pills. I've never done a drug in my entire life and I aspired to achieve a rewarding life, I'm constantly trying to shave my body hair off but I get ingron hairs on my shoulders and back andcits so thick if I wax it I developed cystic follicultus that takes an entire year to heal I'm very pale so the hair and stubble is extremely unsightly andcnoticable and I suffer immensely and am scrutinized by SSI over my condition and benefits and get reprimanded because I don't go to drs anymore and I can't have more than 2k saved up and forced to stay poor but I once I had a great life and those memories torture me and I wish I could go back and havecpwfect hair still and normal body hair and call my teeth and love in my life. None in 23 years all my ex's and friends ended up being drs CEOS veterinarians film producers teachers nurses models actors and I'm stuck in my childhood bedroom impoverished disfigured never drove no I.D in 23 years barley eat because empty fridge and cabinets drug addict parents lonely AF my dog died in my arms on st Patrick's day on a morning I was suffering from a torn cornea on my eye and 2 ulcers and I had him since i was 16 that was 8 years ago already , I have a disc in my upper back/spine that causes me 10 out of 10 pain that makes me feel crippled and can't even sleep for weeks at a time barley at all because its so painful I have constant nightmares and vivid bizarre dreams my teeth hurt and I have to pull them my self I live in a 30k rented house in an ugly ghetto part of town in Pennsylvania, but I watch yt videos all day andctry to learn but get SO jealous of rich and good looking people and videos of Santorini, Italy, ,Monaco , Beverly hills, Capri, Monte Carlo, and it makes me wish I was deadcso bad stuck in a room ugly beyond recognition disfigured poor hungry lonely with low class minded parents I was due to graduate with a 4.0 and wasxdestine and poised for a fulfilling life but Lupus destroyed me even the drs said I have the worst case of scarring alopecia they ever seen and I was seen by a Team of them all at once and its treatment resistant and causes me agony 24-7 now that's real body dismorphia not a perceived flaw like ohh my nose is too big grrrrr! The mental torment I endure on acdaily basis is insufferably intolerable but I am forced to live this way and hate knowing my only way out is death the pain of suicide scares me so much I need out out of my misery. Every aspect of my life is a nightmare , imagine a well dressed toxic avenger or method addict freak wearing creed aventus and a nice ass automatic movement watch who's listening to Mozart on a BT speaker ... That's me delusional because I want to be good looking but its like putting makeup on a pig I'll never get to be me again no love never drive dirt poor no way out no I.D no hair no smooth skin hairy bald no teeth disgusting nobody who will suffer till the day I FINALLY die and then end up in hell anyway to suufer even more and eternally I'm so lost and bitter and I wish someone could help me summer is coming and I hate long hot days in my room with no AC its hell already I genuinely think I have the worst life of anyone who ever lived and I'm the ugliest person who exists 😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢
I’m sorry
Please seek help. You need the right medication and CBT. Life will get better for you after them
This life doesn't matter, it's just a test to see who can overcome the world. the real life is the salvation which is too come. How can this life matter if we end up d*ad? after a few weeks people go on with their life. You can achieve everything and still be empty and then d*e. please if anything read ecclisastes in the bible. One thing my therapist told me which completely changed the game for me was to not wait for the feeling of happiness or joy to come before I enjoy myself...rather enjoy yourself then those feelings of happiness and joy will come. pls update me if you want:)
In the UK, a trainee Gp in given a total of 2 hours training on BDD issues
I wish I could find a group therapy like you guys i used to go to group therapy when I lived in London now live in Somerset I've suffered with depression body dismorpher not good at spelling group therapy is great you can connect with people with the same outlook and bacsley you help eachother because I've lost all my confidence I've suffered for from the age of around 19 now in my 50s i have good days but everything you all talking about that's me it's great to open up only with the right people i do have a lot of trust issues thanks for the video Mark.
I didn’t even know what bbd is until I got into USA but I had it since middle school I remember hating my body my mom suffers from it as well but she will never admit that she used to body shame me because I had hourglass shape and I didn’t look as tall skinny models she told me she loved it when she was so skinny that she could see bones above her chest. I got so skinny at age of 17 I had to go to hospital often due to malnourishment and weakness. In 2019 I got so skinny but I didn’t even know only what I could see my “womanly body “ my boyfriend sneaked ensure in my diet just so I can gain weight he admitted to me he was scared to hug me at night because he thought he can suffocate me accidentally how small I was and even in those moment I still thought I look fat . Every day is a struggle and I lost all hope that one day I will truly see myself 😞
This is the crazy thing, people who have this and are able to have relationships. My BDD was so bad that I thought anyone who was interested in me was trying to humiliate me when I actually was attractive and now that I am unattractive I know I will never have real relationships again. If someone legitimately expressed an interest in a relationship I would be able to disprove the negative beliefs I have due to BDD. I know I'm not going to live much longer.
Relationships just don't start that way for heterosexual males, so thus there was nothing I could use that was tangible to disprove that I was too ugly to be found attractive.
Still dealing with bullemia 18 years later. As soon as I feel that there’s food in my stomach I just like I have to throw up. I don’t know how to get past it. I don’t even have to force it… after a few bites as soon as I can feel food in my stomach I excuse myself to the restroom and automatically vomit. I’m a healthy bmi but since I had a child my body has changed in ways I cannot accept. I hate to say it but I will never be okay with food. I see gorgeous women much heavier than I am and I’m so jealous. It’s not really about weight it’s about the fact that I look vile above 100 lbs. it’s just obsessive. I’m 130 now and I see extremely morbidly obese people and empathize with them because I feel the same. God I wish there was a cure for this shit.
Same honestly but just remember you aren’t alone and you look beautiful
It's been 30 years for me. I can't even put a label on it because I mostly restrict but I've done it all. I accept it will be a part of my life forever.
Love you Mia ❤️ Always proud of you girl
Love you more! ❤
@Mia-zm7ri ur drop dead gorgeous actually I know its more than just thinking u look bad but ur absolutely adorable ❤
I have BDD and honestly I couldn't sit at that table without either sunglasses or a Covid type mask on. I have to cover either the top half or bottom half of my face. It is awful and people have no idea how brutal it can be
I’ve battled this for so long now that I can’t even find the energy or point of explaining myself to anyone anymore. Just want to die now, but I don’t want to hurt my family.
The echo of the room is quite overwhelming
I’m only a few minutes in so I can’t speak for the rest of the video, but I’m not sure that mentioning specific numbers and your lowest weight is the best thing to be doing…great that a conversation is being had but I feel like some details should be omitted for the sake of everyone.
Yeah, came here to say this. I have anorexia, and putting numbers (especially the fact that she included her height too, so people can work out bmi) in for other people to hear is very, very dangerous. You can die from an eating disorder at ANY WEIGHT. Everyone is unique, she is clearly very proud of the bmi number her eating disorder allowed her to "achieve", but if anyone out there is listening and their eating disorder is grasping on to that number, please try to fight it. It's not worth it. Stay safe out there ❤
Really ignorant comment here. I am not proud. I am just trying to point out how severe it was and how life-threatening it was for me.@@sarahhughes1505
@@sarahhughes1505 its not dangerous,people with anorexia cannot be any more obsessed with weight and appearance than they already are and if they want to hear numbers and BMI figures to compare themselves with ,they will anyway.You cannot be protected from every potential trigger and must take some responsibilty for yourselves.Staying safe is finding a reason to get better for and sticking with it,not avoiding any mention of things that upset you.
@scarred10 well, that was ignorant. This video didn't trigger or upset me, but i know if i had seen it a few years ago when i was deeply entrenched in my illness, it could have. Have a bit of empathy and sympathy for other people. You can tell a story just fine without mentioning a number that could be a whip someone uses to flog themselves to death.
@@sarahhughes1505 as I said,you must take responsibility for your own symptoms ,of course a doscission of life threatening amorexia may include a ref to BMI or weight as one anout BDD may talk about cosmetic surgery.Ive been affected by by both illnesses by the way.
Can I join the group? 😅 everyone seems so nice ❤
I'm glad your here this got me ❤
Wow thank you for this
Idk if I would call my problems with my appearance BDD, I think I'm just objectively too ugly to be loved. (And I don't think it's a self-esteem issue bc I'm actually pretty okay with my personality and like myself well enough outside of my appearance.) Being ugly has made me very dysfunctional and incapable of having a support network.
I have been diagnosed with OCD, but I don't obsess about any particular part of my body bc I don't like anything about my body. Every part of it is ugly. I never look in mirrors if I can avoid it, and I never take pictures of myself, so it's not like I'm spending all day scrutinizing myself. I don't bother. I already know what's wrong with every part of me, and looking at it won't change it.
I avoid talking to people if I can and I don't really have any friends IRL. I think it's better that way bc I feel repulsive and disgusting the whole time I'm talking to anyone and I just want to get away. Even if I weren't too ugly for a relationship I don't think I could have one. Fortunately, no one is interested, so it's never a problem, though the loneliness and lack of affection sucks.
I don't think I have BDD so much as just the normal behaviours of a person who is objectively ugly. It's mostly a problem bc it's almost impossible to exist in this world without interacting with other people, which I hate doing, so I will put off doing a lot of things I need to do just to avoid being looked at. I'm also extremely poor bc I can't do a regular job. And, like I said, I have no real support network.
I had a bad outcome with my BDD. No, I can't relate my case to anybody else. Did a plastic surgery that had the worse possible outcome and would advise not to go through that path. It had nothing to do with weight but a specific organ. In my case it stopped my from looking in the mirror in front of other people or touching this organ in public. But it was a journey that started when I was 14/15 years old and at 42 I decide to go with the surgery. I wouldn't talk to anyone about it. My advise, see a specialist.
It's even worse when u take mirrors with you every where u go. I recently bought a small mirror that I put in my backpack just to keep reminding myself that I looked very disgusting while on my journey to wherever I've gone to. My dismorphia is caused by my acne tbh and I really tried everything to take them away but nothing has worked for me and so I feel like I am stuck with this ugly face of mine for good. I even wear disposable musk on a daily basis and it even causes more attention but it's better than walking with my ugly bare face out.
I relate to this so much it drove me to hating myself it dousnt help with all those Hollywood stars and models that all look perfect i remember thinking no one would care if I killed myself but I didn't This isn't my ghost typing this
its so sad because they are such beautiful people in their own way
Is it just me? Or do I feel like this happens in my generation more than my Dad or Grandpa? I’ve had it for such a long time and still do a lot. I don’t know how to cure it. I’ve tried dieting and looking in the mirror less but it causes anxiety, mental confusion and physical pain. The only times I Don’t really get it is when I have long hair and a beard. But I’m forced to cut it for certain events. So I want to learn to ignore my appearance. I try to but I can’t. I feel like I’ve tried everything. Please help!
its problably bcs social media is a big part in this generation. Maybe u can buy a wig? so u dont have to cut ur hqir!
Trans people need to watch this.
Awesome discussion ❤❤❤❤❤
You all are very brave and beautiful people. I hate looking in the mirror or seeing my reflection. I am very weird. My friend reminds me all the time that I am ugly but he said I do have a beautiful soul. I have been called ugly since a kid so now at 35, I stopped fighting it. I am learning to accept ugly and just try to live the best I can.
What I need to know is if I'm really fat and gross or is it BBD.
I want to know the truth about me
Sadly most people either have no idea about nutrition at all, or even worse than that - are misinformed. Weight loss happens gradually, over some amount of time, depending how much weight you want to lose. All these crazy diets of restricting you will always bounce back.
A diet that works is eating just a little bit less than you usually do, and being honest with yourself. If each month you eat in total 5% less calories than the last month, your weight will be gradually going down, in a healthy way.
Fasting is a thing, but you need to understand what you're doing. People who really are clueless about nutrition shouldn't do fasting.
Practice meditation, it is a superpower. Read some philosophy. Spending days worrying about your image is literally robbing yourself of actual beauty. You can be the most beautiful person on the outside, but if you're just a shell - people will just see you as meat.
Find something that matters.
i dont have body dysmoprhia (i dont think), but i always am so insecure about my height and my weight. I'm 5'1 and 160 pounds (female). I dont know what my body type is, but if anyone is like me, can you tell me how i can lose my weight ?
Where can I get help for this? I have body dysmorphia from the gym. All I do is feel small, skinny and comparing myself to these guys on social media. It’s draining and I hate it so much. I hate looking in the mirror. Please help
Just seeing this now. Happy to chat if you want
I know this is off topic but whats the little melody that plays during the intro/title?
is tis Charlie from towie? if It is met him once and got a ew pics he was so sweet xx I started with bulimia from the age of 18, still have relapses between bulimia and anorexia.
It is him hun xxx
BDD is excruciatingly debilitating. Literally, the worst thing anyone could ever go through and is rooted in low self esteem and ironically, most of the carriers are attractive. Only Jesus can set us free.
Hello everyone, if you feel like struggling and want to reach out to someone, I would suggest reaching out to BDD foundation ❤
All these people in the comments with their OWN face as their profile pic-
I don't think that Charlie had BDD. As I hear him talk it kinda invalidates what BDD is. He was just insecure- totally different
Absolutely disgusting that I got weight loss ads on this video. I also got ads for a gambling site on the one about gambling addiction. Thanks, UA-cam! 🖕
Losing my hair living in a third world country where no one understands you or your worldview is very draining
I am 29, I was fat all my life. So bullied, people keep laught at me, saying ugly. I developed depression, social phobia, become household for years. Abusive family, can’t find a work. Now my quality of life has improved but the society keep wanting only thin people. I can’t find clothes, partner. Is still a big problem. I take a lot of psichiatric medication and the weight loss is very hard.
Just want to let you know that you are loved and you belong here. ❤
@@mpauli12 🤍
I was born deformed. I am a woman, yet I have the shoulders and hips of a man. My butt is flat. I have a chest, but due to weightloss,they are sagging. I hate my body. I despise it. Why does God not love me/=? If he loved me, he would have made me a feminine. Curvy, soft, but instead I was made to look like a man
The fact that they all are equally gorgeous and handsome make me sick
You can be conventionally attractive and still have bdd
i hate it sm
Young people really need to stay busy and productive. It helps to keep the self morphing at bay.
Ok
If you dont have bdd youre not even allowed to make a comment on this.
We all have that but some of us let that go.
@@susanjohnston5649 I feel I can just envision you waving a walking stick above your head whilst on a small soap box stating, with your whole chest, “backkk in my dayyy….”.
Mental illness is real, wether it was visible to you or not. It’s always been real, and it’s always been there. Maybe you are lucky enough that such distractions have worked for you, but that is not the case with everyone. I know you were trying to be helpful with this comment, but this is an incredibly old and warped view on how mental health works.
@@tatianaaa4569disagree, symptoms for me are significantly worse when I have too much time on my hands to obsess over these things.
If we were from a country that didn’t know where their next meal was coming from, or in a war torn country for example then these obsessions are unlikely to have started in the first place. First world problems as they say.
Why does everyone else with BDD look objectively good, and then there's me 😭
170cm is actually 5'7" not 5'8", idk why that bugged me but yeah
Sorry I am 5'8" but idk what that is in cm
@@milliesansoye6560 Ah no worries, converting measurements is always confusing :) hope you are well 💖
We gotta realize that its not and *individual* problem. This techno-capitalist system makes masses people sick like this!
Ironically they're all attractive.
I suffer from BDD and looking for help.
The BDD Foundation have amazing resources and advice xx
They're all handsome