CRUCIFY YOUR FANTASIES. | EP 21 | SavedNotSoftPodcast

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  • Опубліковано 28 тра 2024
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 2,3 тис.

  • @creezhan
    @creezhan 3 місяці тому +105

    Delulu is not the solulu

  • @Deettamonique
    @Deettamonique 10 місяців тому +4129

    You are SPEAKING!!!! I used to idolize relationships and marriage. So when i got into relationships. I would justify my flesh sin because i would fantasize about being married to my partner, “Because how is it a sin when we’re going to be married ?” Smh Praise Jesus for conviction and self awareness!!!

    • @Robiuche
      @Robiuche 10 місяців тому +25

      Amen!!

    • @cruzggrace
      @cruzggrace 10 місяців тому +25

      Amen sis!!!

    • @christyslif4666
      @christyslif4666 10 місяців тому +45

      Oh Lord this message right here . God forgive me .

    • @Deettamonique
      @Deettamonique 10 місяців тому +81

      @@christyslif4666 God has forgiven you. Now you just have to live without shame and strive to live a holy life. You got this!!!

    • @Deettamonique
      @Deettamonique 10 місяців тому +9

      @@cruzggrace🙏🏾💕

  • @kranchProductions
    @kranchProductions 10 місяців тому +744

    These fantasies are rooted in escapism. We are addicted to escaping reality into these fantasy worlds (entertainment)

    • @refiloe650
      @refiloe650 7 місяців тому +31

      Even my choice of books is an escape from reality

    • @aez378
      @aez378 6 місяців тому +1

      yup

    • @renabeliever3628
      @renabeliever3628 6 місяців тому

      EXACTLY!!!

    • @mieraftesfai6919
      @mieraftesfai6919 5 місяців тому

      True

    • @dalpaengi
      @dalpaengi 5 місяців тому +6

      @@refiloe650Me too.
      Fan fiction too. It’s tough.

  • @TheFreelanceFiles
    @TheFreelanceFiles 9 місяців тому +943

    Did I get called out? Yes. Did my flesh hate it? Yes. Did my Spirit love it? YESSS . Needed to hear this.. thank you, Lord for working through you in telling the truth

    • @Won_core
      @Won_core 6 місяців тому +6

      I felt the same way 😢 and felt conviction about it 😭

    • @Official._gabrielle
      @Official._gabrielle 5 місяців тому +3

      Amen

    • @carolinel3668
      @carolinel3668 5 місяців тому +1

      Me too! God knew this is something I’m struggling with and intentionally put this on my feed!

    • @ShelbyLov3
      @ShelbyLov3 4 місяці тому

      I second this!!!

    • @oreneilekarabophiri9447
      @oreneilekarabophiri9447 3 місяці тому

      Me too

  • @royalusala8527
    @royalusala8527 10 місяців тому +1869

    "The things you daydream about in your spare time are often the things that have captured your imagination and so are ultimately the things you serve." Timothy Keller

  • @keziah.johnson
    @keziah.johnson 10 місяців тому +1705

    "Satan came and made God's goodness look bland and boring" GORRLLLLLL I had to pause and rewind and pause and rewind because the Holy Spirit was speaking to my heart right there.

    • @Deettamonique
      @Deettamonique 10 місяців тому +20

      Right!!!

    • @xavierthomas5835
      @xavierthomas5835 10 місяців тому +25

      Amen and amen. Grounding ourselves in the reality God shaped for our pleasure is one of the most important things. Truth is good and worthy to be rejoiced in.

    • @limitless_lagging
      @limitless_lagging 10 місяців тому +10

      I didnt get to thaat vid point yet, but this is just straight facts!!

  • @strawberry_gf
    @strawberry_gf 3 місяці тому +156

    social media is a fantasy as well!! mindlessly scrolling, absorbing other people's highight reels and short form entertainment. addiction to distraction is the death of production

    • @daschuhow
      @daschuhow 2 місяці тому +2

      Amen! 8:14

    • @KeturaM-js9ij
      @KeturaM-js9ij Місяць тому

      N if there’s live then they probably record ages ago

  • @DearStephanieX
    @DearStephanieX 10 місяців тому +1408

    “Fantasy is the foreplay of sin”…wow you said it so clear. THIS IS HUGE. God showed me this recently, and now I have to change the entire structure of my thoughts 😢…. It’s limerence( a coping mechanism)! Rooted in neglect/loneliness and wanting to be loved, etc

    • @nathaliasimone_
      @nathaliasimone_ 9 місяців тому +8

      Mhmmm yeah that quote is speaking !!!

    • @saracontad8458
      @saracontad8458 9 місяців тому +32

      i still struggle with this also stemming from loniness and wanting love ;(

    • @nataliealvarado9753
      @nataliealvarado9753 9 місяців тому +5

      Thank you for speaking the truth, ily❤

    • @sanctifiedsessions3518
      @sanctifiedsessions3518 8 місяців тому +26

      SAME HERE! My fantasies are rooted in neglect & wanting to be wanted 💯😔

    • @Official._gabrielle
      @Official._gabrielle 5 місяців тому +1

      Thank you

  • @2inspireU
    @2inspireU 10 місяців тому +811

    Well, the Holy Spirit definitely led me to watch this. I have been stuck in a fantasy world since I was a child because it was a way to escape my painful reality. It is now a coping mechanism that I go to frequently. What makes it worse is that I spend a lot of time alone, so my imagination is how I entertain myself. I want to be set free from this, but I feel like this is so ingrained in my thoughts that I can’t imagine who I would be without them. Please pray with me for my desire to give up these thoughts and be set free in mind. I have often said that I feel like a prisoner of my own thoughts/mind .

    • @blssdlove
      @blssdlove 8 місяців тому +55

      I just prayed for you! What you said about spending a lot of time alone, maybe during those moments you spend it with God and learn more about Him. Or maybe you can spend time with godly Christian friend/s, or try a new hobby! May God bless you. Jesus Christ is Lord! 🤍

    • @2inspireU
      @2inspireU 8 місяців тому +8

      @@blssdlove thank you! I will try your suggestions.

    • @dipitambockeabrahamjaphet8516
      @dipitambockeabrahamjaphet8516 8 місяців тому +10

      I pray the Holy Spirit heal and deliver you ❤️

    • @elizabethreid4105
      @elizabethreid4105 8 місяців тому +22

      Just prayed for you. You're not alone! I, too have struggled with this since I was little, however through the Lord's strength we can take every thought captive and teach them to obey Christ. God bless you

    • @Joshuasss
      @Joshuasss 8 місяців тому +9

      Try saying and declaring that you are free! Because who the son sets free is free indeed! Ur free to say what ur going through, and take it up to God, not saying you don’t but sometimes you need to confess and DECALRE it’s powerful to speak life over ourselves but in a Godly way. tell God how hard it is or how u feel like I’m what I would say God it’s hard, it’s my comfort, and I think about it to feel loved but I know my comfort is from you and I know I can rest my heart in you. Your really what love is. and my mind is set free because of you guide me Lord, in Jesus name amen praying for you to g stay safe :))❤❤❤

  • @nat6892
    @nat6892 8 місяців тому +110

    the feeling of NEEDING to be loved by a person, when God’s love is more than enough is insane to me. it doesn’t make sense, yet i have fell so many times to this lack of discernment. Lord forgive me.

    • @theatlantianauthor7051
      @theatlantianauthor7051 7 днів тому +1

      I suggest that you read Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge, its really helped me and my sisters when addressing our innate feminine desires from a Christian view.

  • @toniao.6253
    @toniao.6253 8 місяців тому +450

    When we daydream or fantasise in order to plan our next steps, daydreaming can be productive. But when we indulge in daydreams instead of taking action, daydreaming is destructive.

  • @lucykabi8339
    @lucykabi8339 8 місяців тому +197

    I'm done being delulu 😭I honestly didn't know it was this bad, it's funny how the devil tries to paint a sin like a really good thing, then was manifesting now it's being delusional, I'm glad I chose to listen to this, may God help us

    • @winnerlucky369
      @winnerlucky369 3 місяці тому +2

      Real delulu...God help us

    • @khensk
      @khensk 3 місяці тому +2

      Literally

  • @collegetia
    @collegetia 10 місяців тому +1622

    Forgive me Lord. I’ve been doing this from a young age! It is/was my safe place. It kept me out of a lot of trouble! It was my escape… I mourned listening to this message because I know I have to give this up because I want to please God!

    • @ChristineSmileyFace
      @ChristineSmileyFace 10 місяців тому +52

      Love and prayers to you sister. Your comment hit close to home for me. ❤

    • @ruby_yy.
      @ruby_yy. 10 місяців тому +55

      I can relate to you. May God give us all enough strength to overcome this sin/flee from this sin.

    • @SharlenesJourney
      @SharlenesJourney 10 місяців тому +10

      Me too 🙏🏾

    • @TheOGs1234b
      @TheOGs1234b 10 місяців тому +14

      I’ve struggled with this issue too

    • @Pleasant-but-Enigmatic
      @Pleasant-but-Enigmatic 10 місяців тому +30

      Same. It's comforting to know I'm not alone in this, and to know we are all praying for each other to beat this ❤.

  • @purposelypri
    @purposelypri 10 місяців тому +661

    The part where she said when someone ticks you off and you fantasize about what you really would’ve done or said in the argument is so true 😂😂😂

    • @lilathinks7477
      @lilathinks7477 10 місяців тому +12

      Literallyyyy

    • @xavierthomas5835
      @xavierthomas5835 10 місяців тому +14

      Amen. Been there the same. And it never made anything better.

    • @theok4me
      @theok4me 10 місяців тому +3

      Exactly… I stopped like aww 😮

    • @pri_shay_dior
      @pri_shay_dior 10 місяців тому +2

      I know this is random, but your handle caught my attention. Then, I saw your UA-cam name and had to chuckle. I used to use Pretty Pri/Pretty Eyes Pri a lot in my late teens. I've never seen anyone else use it before.

    • @Derrickj-qn3em
      @Derrickj-qn3em 8 місяців тому +1

      All day

  • @Tazerszn
    @Tazerszn 9 місяців тому +371

    “ your mind is your playground but not your reality” this is good ‼️ 12:44

  • @MilkandCookies92
    @MilkandCookies92 9 місяців тому +273

    We need to start viewing men as our brothers in Christ. The same can be said when it comes to them, they need to view us as our sisters in Christ. When you treat the opposite sex this way, you'll respect them instead of lust after them which can result in entertaining fantasies. This has helped me overcome this area in my life because I have also struggled with this. I felt conviction from The Holy Spirit about it recently and it made me repent for disrespecting the personhood of a man I really liked even though nothing ever physical happened between us. Sin begins in the mind. No condemnation, stay pure sis'! Don't let the world gaslight and make you ashamed of your purity! 🙏

    • @rubiksworld2170
      @rubiksworld2170 3 місяці тому +8

      Thank you for this comment

    • @laylology5385
      @laylology5385 3 місяці тому +8

      yessss! i feel like, as a teenager, its so easy for me to not see people my age as my brothers/sisters in Christ. it's very easy for me to respect and love younger/ older people and be unified with them through the Lord, but i VERY VERY often cannot feel that deep connection with my peers because i feel like it is so normalized for there to be a division between my generation and that is especially apparent between opposing genders. similarly, its so normalized for teenagers to sin (SPECIFICALLY when it comes to saving ourselves for marriage) . many teens just want to rebel against their parents (which, OFC is a sin that even i fall into) without realizing their going against their ultimate creator. i had a hard some hard times on my walk to Christ and i thank God allowed me to stay safe and pure during the time i had zero interest in following Him!

    • @LightShineDesserts
      @LightShineDesserts 2 місяці тому +1

      But not everyone out here is in Christ so isn’t it we can’t say that every woman/man out there is another sister/brother in Christ? But we should still treat them as Jesus wants so we don’t fall into that

    • @qswaggy1316
      @qswaggy1316 Місяць тому +1

      Thank you so much for saying this. It really changed my perspective so much!!

  • @shavezequeenbellamy7708
    @shavezequeenbellamy7708 10 місяців тому +1328

    I'm only 10 minutes in and it's spot on. Since i was in probably 3rd or 4th grade, I had been fantasizing about fake relationships based off of movies, videos and songs. The older I got, the more i used it to escape my reality. I would listen to music all day and fantasize. I would watch movies like 365 days, 50 shades of grey, Bridgerton, and other steamy movies and shows and pretend it was my life, for years! I try creating a perfect life in my head when it comes to sex, money, future kids, future home, how i talk with my man and kids, how my fake man attends to me and ALL.

    • @rosaela-daughterinchrist
      @rosaela-daughterinchrist 10 місяців тому +180

      In so glad I'm not alone. I'm into my sophomore year of highschool and I've been doing this since elementary as well. I would run around my house listening to music and fantasizing. Its going to be something hard to unlearn.

    • @Angelface11
      @Angelface11 10 місяців тому

      You were watching sex movies as a Christian?

    • @rhodanjeri9300
      @rhodanjeri9300 10 місяців тому +50

      This has been me for a very long time as well, everything you've described. But I'm trusting that the Grace of God is sufficient for me, and I will crucify my fantasies

    • @moniquewrites9046
      @moniquewrites9046 10 місяців тому +110

      It’s called *limerence* and usually it occurs as a coping mechanism for people with childhood neglect, abandonment, PTSD or low self-esteem. There’s a podcast “Crappy Childhood Fairy” who goes into detail with this.
      She says not to judge yourself but of course to develop better coping skills to ground oneself to reality.
      -
      Limerence is a state of infatuation or obsession with another person that involves an all-consuming passion and intrusive thoughts. "It is often a result of not being present either through trauma or certain childhood development issues," explains psychosexual therapist Cate Mackenzie.Dec 1, 2022

    • @proverbs3565
      @proverbs3565 10 місяців тому +25

      Oh my goodness! This is me to a T! I have done this for as long as I can remember. It was so strong in my life that it would affect my moods Andy attitude. God has been dealing with me about it and I was doing okay for a while but recently I slipped back into it and He's brought the hammer down again. It's so good to know I'm not the only one!

  • @AGandLife
    @AGandLife 10 місяців тому +931

    I needed this. I have been struggling with letting go of my “dream life” where I have “the” husband, “the” kids, “the” friends, “the” job, “the” clothes, and “the” house. It would be ridiculous if I had a husband, kids, a six figure job, or a house, right now. I just graduated high school. I have been so worried that I will never have any of those things that my mind has created an alternate reality, so I had somewhere to “escape to”.
    Lord, I repent of trying to make my own way out. I know that what you have for me is better than anything my mind could conceive and anything the devil could distract me with. I trust You, God, and I’m willing to destroy my imaginations, follow Your lead, and be grateful for where I am.

    • @taeisrood470
      @taeisrood470 10 місяців тому +33

      i felt this very hard and relate a lot. i also just graduated and am going into my first year of college and just have been non-stop worrying this summer about my past choices, my career, and my future in general, which then in return led me to fantasize about everything to extreme levels. it’s something i really have to unlearn since i’ve been doing this at a very young age. now that i’m really getting more into the word and strengthening my relationship with God, i’ve been constantly reminding myself to Let Go and Let God!

    • @alinabowe7964
      @alinabowe7964 10 місяців тому +5

      This is perfectly said.

    • @xavierthomas5835
      @xavierthomas5835 10 місяців тому

      Amen and amen. Always praying for you sister.

    • @liam9716
      @liam9716 10 місяців тому +1

      Today I was with my mom in the car, I missed my exboyfriend and wonder why he didn't ask me to marry him.
      I have a boyfriend now, my mother told me as an observation his ypung and has dreams (of moving to another country) and you also have dreams (my first tought was the one of moving to Israel) you know or staying, but I don't really give a CRAP because all is dung compared to what God has for me. I really don't sant anything, tired of broken wells that don't have water. It is easier said than don't but God have mercy on me, I know He is and His guiding me ❤🙌

    • @xavierthomas5835
      @xavierthomas5835 10 місяців тому +2

      @@liam9716 There is a fountain of forgiveness. And for certain, if thou qilt believe, he will forgive. And his forgiveness is health.
      But Jesus turned him about, and when he saw her, he said, Daughter, be of good comfort; thy faith hath made thee whole. And the woman was made whole from that hour. Matthew 9:22

  • @rabshire381
    @rabshire381 3 місяці тому +17

    9 times out of 10, I'm seeking comfort. Once I figured this out, I've been working on letting God be my comfort.

    • @BethKnox32
      @BethKnox32 26 днів тому +1

      How to let God comfort us?

    • @rabshire381
      @rabshire381 20 днів тому +3

      @@BethKnox32 let God control the outcomes and try to be obedient in the process and know he had plans for us to prosper and not for us to perish.

  • @ajayipeace1355
    @ajayipeace1355 5 місяців тому +54

    When God said "Don't serve idols", He wasn't just talking about things created with human hands, He was also talking about things created in your mind - your fantasies.
    Those words are deep Ma'am.

  • @jboyd8224
    @jboyd8224 10 місяців тому +618

    I’m blown away that so many other women struggle with this. I know without a shadow of a doubt God brought me to this video. I have been doing this since I was in middle school. I mean it got to a point where I couldn’t go to sleep without going into my fantasy world. When I first started doing it I would find time in my day just to rest my eyes so I could go there. It started out with celebrities, then I slowly started creating my own people. My main character was me but wasn’t because she was who I wanted to be but wasn’t. I recently gave them up again, because like sis said in the beginning they would always lead into further perversion. They’d start off “clean,” but quickly became something else. Don’t let me watch a movie with a storyline I liked, or read a book, or whatever the case then I was starting a new fantasy. Now, I struggle with knowing what to watch because it doesn’t have to be rated r for me to go into my mind with it. It’s become a comfort thing. I also struggle with separating my creative mind with my fantasy mind…. I write creatively. I have always felt that I’ve perverted my expressive and very imaginative mind in a way that God had not intended. I notice I write better when I’m in alignment with God. I’m so glad I came across this video.

    • @jboyd8224
      @jboyd8224 10 місяців тому +40

      @samoandannielle it’s still hard some nights, like I said anything can trigger a fantasy. Even healthy wholesome stuff. What I’ve been doing to go to sleep is meditating on scripture, even talking to God, singing a gospel song, anything to focus so I don’t sit there wondering half the night. Keeping a sleep schedule will help train you to go to bed without struggle also. If you have a brain like me then I know it’s hard to have a very active mind that doesn’t ever seem to quiet down. Brown noise, fan noise something lol, will help.

    • @tessaparis6223
      @tessaparis6223 10 місяців тому +23

      I relate with you so much. Everything you said is a perfect description. I thought I was the only one too and now that thought feels silly after watching the video and seeing all the comments. I’m thankful God brought me to this video. 1 Corinthians 10:13 “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.” This verse makes sense now.

    • @kemiolusegun1880
      @kemiolusegun1880 10 місяців тому +23

      It's not even funny because this is me. I've stopped a lot of things because of it. It was like I found comfort in it, I had to think of something before I'm able to sleep if not I'd toss and turn for hours and wake up feeling like I didn't even sleep at all. I started to hate myself for it, it was like my mind was never silent and there was always something going on.. sometimes I have to create them to be sleep better, it has even started to affect my relationship with GOD and I just happened to see this video. I have never come across this page in my life and it just had to be this topic. God really is intentional about me.

    • @noncin.2786
      @noncin.2786 10 місяців тому +3

      Thank you for sharing...this is all so relatable and this video came right on time! That part about even wholesome stuff can be a trigger if you have a creative imagination..(like 'hello brain, where are you even going to with this thought train!') It can be so hard but i have to keep on taking thoughts captive and question if it's a thought that is Phil4.8 or not...praying we can all hear and listen to Holy Spirit on how we can be better and realign ourselves with God's will..because hard doesn't mean impossible and we have to be able to have a healthy balance of the creative mind and function in the world without falling into sin🙏

    • @NINANIKKITA
      @NINANIKKITA 10 місяців тому +24

      I think it's called maladaptive day dreaming and it is so comforting esp when I can't deal with the real world.. It's literally 3am south African time and I was about to go into another fantasy world to fall back to sleep and I came across this video and comment 😭

  • @faraboverubies7
    @faraboverubies7 10 місяців тому +312

    Convicted. I’ve been doing this for years. Fantasizing about better days, a better life where things are “perfect”, a life where I am loved, respected, appreciated and where I matter. Lord help us. Deliver us from vain imaginations, in Jesus name.

    • @aez378
      @aez378 6 місяців тому

      it’s a coping mechanism too 1000% hiding behind the lie of faith. i can’t tell if it’s delusion or if it’s faith cuz currently for me life is cruddy but i’m holding onto today isn’t where i’m going to be forever because i KNOW God is going to lift me. Can’t tell if it’s fantasy or faith, i think fantasy when i think MY plans and delusions are going to come true and that’s where we get hurt or disappointed cuz we think God didn’t show up but it’s just that He didn’t how we wanted him to

  • @amarakuti6732
    @amarakuti6732 8 місяців тому +95

    I struggle with this as well. I have been for so many years at this point. I have noticed it might start off clean like having a perfect family but it gets so dirty and I start touching myself. I feel so disgusted with myself every time and I repent every time but always manage to backslide. It’s always been a way of escapism for me. Like you said, I fantasize about what I lack. A life where I have a boyfriend/husband, kids, a fun social life with my friends, money, vacations. It may make me feel content when I go to my mind but i realize now I harm myself more. God deliver me! Help me lord to keep my mind focused on you and on reality. Amen!

    • @briannaadjei4660
      @briannaadjei4660 3 місяці тому +5

      I just prayed for you! I go through the same thing and it’s been hard but I leaning on God to repent from this.

  • @VivienMaron
    @VivienMaron 10 місяців тому +158

    This is something I've been struggling with as well. Oddly enough, I never thought of what might be causing/triggering the fantasizing in terms of content, but it makes perfect sense.
    I confided my fantasizing issue to an elderly woman in church and she had a great suggestion: to memorize scripture and mentally recite it. She referenced quite a bit of scripture when she explained it. She essentially said that it's when our minds are empty that the devil can plant bad seeds and that the idle hands are the devil's workshop verse doesn't just refer to physically being active but your mental activity too.
    She asked me what I think about when I'm bored, and it was always fantasizing. She explained that one meaning of captivating our thoughts in Christ is to meditate on His word by memorizing it and reciting it whenever our mind had down time, to not even give it the chance to potentially stray. She did say this will take quite a bit of mental discipline, but the rewards will be incredible.
    She said that by repeatedly reciting scripture like that we can gain a deeper understanding of its meaning AND its application in our life. Through repetition we can impress it on our hearts and live it.
    Granted, this is still something I'm struggling with and I'm only in the infancy stage of overcoming it, but between your advice to physically remove the triggers out of our lives, and the elderly lady's advice to memorize and recite scripture to not led thoughts go astray, I think this is something that we can all overcome.
    Thank you ❤

    • @serinatsuki9511
      @serinatsuki9511 4 місяці тому +12

      I really appreciate this comment for many reasons, but I want to emphasize for all of the introverts who may read this. This is a great way to keep our minds occupied with things of the Lord without having to go out and be in social situations. Because as much as I enjoy being around my brothers and sisters of Christ, social situations still will drain my battery. Filling my mind with scripture and things of the Lord is a great introvert alternative. Thank you for your profound comment. ❤

  • @indigo_dreamz
    @indigo_dreamz 10 місяців тому +488

    Fantasy also can be fearful thoughts, anxiety, creating worst case scenarios, not only lust or sexual related like you said anger too. , I felt like this really spoke to me through your video.thank you!

    • @YTD07
      @YTD07 10 місяців тому +39

      Yes fear about the future, and I rebuking every negative thought in Jesus name

    • @Nichole4Hope
      @Nichole4Hope 10 місяців тому +21

      So true. I struggle with the anger portion. Thinking about what I should’ve did or want to beat someone up on site if we cross paths. Constantly repenting and casting to God because that root is unforgiveness and pride and hate. This video brought some clarity and I have to have a long talk with God about it. Freedom feels so good. The worse kind of torment is in our heads.

    • @casadesabbath
      @casadesabbath 9 місяців тому +2

      Absolutely 💯

    • @generationk2095
      @generationk2095 9 місяців тому +3

      Marvel has a very spiritual background but you only know when you make that connection…if you get where I’m coming from.❤🙏🏻

    • @nakiarobby3996
      @nakiarobby3996 8 місяців тому

      Yes this is the type I really struggle with. Lord Jesus help us to surrender our will , our mind to You. Let us worship You with all our mind, emotion, soul. Make the impossible possible for us Jesus. Thank you for making the impossible possible Jesus. Amen

  • @Imaginelotus
    @Imaginelotus 10 місяців тому +483

    I learned today that I’m delusional… carry on 🚶🏾‍♂️
    P.S. this was a very good listen.

    • @mileseals4838
      @mileseals4838 10 місяців тому +25

      That’s spiritual y’all, it’s not all you think. Ask God to deliver you!!

    • @chickensauce214
      @chickensauce214 5 місяців тому +2

      Fr tho 😭

  • @clispyleaf
    @clispyleaf 10 місяців тому +98

    Just yesterday I realized I need to take my obsession with romance to the cross, nail it there in repentance. And then this video floats in on my recommended the next day 😂

  • @masedimalabela
    @masedimalabela 3 місяці тому +8

    Something crazy I learned... you can work on yourself all you want but it only suppresses your struggle. Jesus could hang out with drunkards, hug prostitutes and not be affected by them. Because his desires weren't suppressed, they weren't there to begin with. Let God do the work, it'll all come out naturally.

    • @Allthingsmaternal
      @Allthingsmaternal 2 місяці тому +1

      Wow! This is good stuff. I’ll be praying to God about this one. Thanks for sharing this revelation

  • @Josh-dp6iu
    @Josh-dp6iu 10 місяців тому +551

    I can guarantee you guys men struggle with this just the same. I’ve had an extreme imagination since I was little. I’ll rehearse lines in my head with women I’ll never end up talking to. I’ll dream of a world where I get the things I want and to be honest it’s heartbreaking and exhausting because it never turns out that way (more so from fear of failure). I believe my fantasies stem from chronic inaction my whole life. That’s also why I’ve always been drawn to music and film; I get to dream of a life that isn’t my own. But it’s funny people think men operate so differently when in reality we’re all very similar, we just wanna be loved, appreciated, and accepted.

    • @sarahanderson7874
      @sarahanderson7874 9 місяців тому +54

      I want to say thank you for sharing and being vulnerable as a man on this topic. Happy you were able to see this video as well! May the Lord continue to show up for you in your mind and in your heart in the ways that you need right now for your walk with Him. I thank God for you

    • @jayseandon
      @jayseandon 9 місяців тому +25

      That’s 100% the truth lol. It starts to mess up your mind and turn everything into a perfectionist mentality. Expect movie type scenes to play out in your life bc you’ve fantasized about it.

    • @Itsdesireegrace
      @Itsdesireegrace 8 місяців тому +1

      Thank you for this ❤

    • @amari1136
      @amari1136 8 місяців тому +5

      Crazy I do the same thing, didn’t even realise I am sinning

    • @imporish1456
      @imporish1456 8 місяців тому +12

      the truth is that men & women are still both human. people tend to forget that! just bc we're socialised differently bc our biology is different, that doesn't mean we are actually all that different. we were both made in the image of God.

  • @HiddenTalent_07
    @HiddenTalent_07 10 місяців тому +55

    She is holding k-drama girlies at GUNPOINT.

    • @faithestari
      @faithestari 10 місяців тому +2

      Those r evilm God convicted me

  • @real.anameria1927
    @real.anameria1927 9 місяців тому +91

    "It was desiring for her eyes, but killed her soul" wow gave me chills. This statement is so true wheneever we get tempted or lust etc.

  • @channeryaiyisa
    @channeryaiyisa 10 місяців тому +95

    My fantasies can be triggered by anything or anyone like movies/series, music, people, tiktoks, books etc. At some point I created my own fantasy world with me as the main character, but I wasnt myself. I was who I wanted to be, getting all the boys that I liked and being the center of attention. My fantasies even went so far that I acted them out. Like talking to air and acting like I was the lead singer in a music video in my room.. 😹. My celebrity crushes or school crushes were also a big part of my fantasies and for some reason my fantasies were always about me, the struggles that I had with my “made up” family, boyfriends or girl drama. Everything and everyone was made up. This sin is definitely an idol.
    I love you so much for this video. This is the first video ever that I have seen of you and it is specifically about this topic that I struggle with so much, God knows what He is doing. This video is going to help me so much. Like I ALWAYS thought that I was the only one struggling with this. And it feels so good that other people also have these same struggles.
    Everyone reading this comment I just want you to know that you can overcome this, we got this together!!!! You are not the only one creating these fantasies.
    I just hope that anyone that can relate with my fantasies gets out of this sin because you will want those fantasies more than the life that God has given us and that will distract us of living the life that God wants us to live.

    • @memorychala61
      @memorychala61 4 місяці тому +2

      Oh my! I can relate to this so much!!!! All that you’ve stated is Meeeee!!! I really believe God knows why I shambled across this video!! 😭😭

    • @eno-effik
      @eno-effik 4 місяці тому +1

      MY GOD I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE!!!!!!!!

    • @catarinafranca1519
      @catarinafranca1519 4 місяці тому +1

      Yeeeeess!! I thought I was the only one too. It's great that we all, as sisters and brothers in Christ, are able to rely on each other and pray. Stay together focusing on God!!

  • @xchorro
    @xchorro 10 місяців тому +190

    I idolized the future of having kids, being married, having friends, being healed, and now ministry school. I need to lay it all down I’ve forgotten about the only one who matters, JESUS

    • @unrulyreznik
      @unrulyreznik 10 місяців тому +2

      yesss🙏🏼🙏🏼

  • @AariannaGonzo
    @AariannaGonzo 10 місяців тому +267

    One thing that I've been trying to do with the fantasized "angry talks" with others is that when I notice it I stop thinking in my head and open myself up to God and turn it into prayer. I start talking to God about how I'm hurt, why I'm saying these things in my head to them etc. It really helps. Turning the fantasy into prayer and giving all those hot air words to God.

    • @amcgee5222
      @amcgee5222 7 місяців тому +15

      Also praying for the people who hurt you helps you as well. It takes your focus off of them being the villain and helps you see that they are a hurt person just like you. They need prayer as well. It puts them in God’s hands and helps you to see them as God sees them.
      Luke 6:27-28 King James Version (KJV)
      But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you, bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you.

    • @aez378
      @aez378 6 місяців тому +1

      had this in my car recently immediately had to forgive them openly to the Lord

    • @aslanasayshello
      @aslanasayshello 6 місяців тому +2

      Amen to that, thank you for sharing!

    • @itsvick4255
      @itsvick4255 5 місяців тому

      Exactly what amcgee said!
      Matthew 6:14 NIV
      For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.

  • @jazminmcmillian3323
    @jazminmcmillian3323 3 місяці тому +15

    Literally yesterday the Holy Spirit spoke to me and I instantly put it in my notes “I’m scared to get out of my head because I won’t have control of my “ideal life” and once I snap back into reality I shut down because I don’t know how to live or speak in my reality. It’s also not helping me towards the reality God has for me.”. Then I found this podcast today and wow. This has became a daily habit that has been with me since childhood. It started as me imagining a better childhood to avoid my reality.

  • @jada-mae8368
    @jada-mae8368 9 місяців тому +165

    this really opened my eyes as someone who used to maladaptive daydream A LOTTT. It was every single hour of everyday and I just could not stop. I'm so glad that God showed how terrible things were and now I'm trying my best to stop and draw nearer to him even when it's not easy!

    • @juelmapereira4277
      @juelmapereira4277 6 місяців тому +3

      Even me

    • @preciousbaatsebamtswenifok8724
      @preciousbaatsebamtswenifok8724 5 місяців тому +1

      How did u learn to stop?

    • @gorile6944
      @gorile6944 5 місяців тому

      Same girl. How are you doing now?

    • @yeonake
      @yeonake 4 місяці тому

      How did you stop

    • @MakingThings-oq3ik
      @MakingThings-oq3ik 3 місяці тому

      you bet its not easy, it took me two and a half years of falling feeling disgusted of myself, two and a half years to stop reading stories and comics that was setting my mind to certain ways of working! And its still tempting but ive fallen so many times that this little voice had deceived me that it was ok! It was not! And the Lord was there all the way, thank God. I still have some thoughts but fighting!!! We got this, we are stronger than this. Its what she said what you water will grow. Something more encouraging now: After starting to following the lord and getting to know him better i had momments that reality became better than any fantasy i could have of me being or doing something "cool" for example in a situation, it exided every expectation i had and i knew it was the lord because it was for his glory, i asked him for help and he is teaching me how to truly be the cool person i always wanted to be or possibly meant to be in his own way beautifully none the less :D (this makes me a bit embarassed for writiing but it may be encouraging for some of you that maybe are like i was before and want to be and act coolin certain situations or even a bit ambitious or even prideful in the things you want or could have ancombleshed if you were given the chance to do so) i couldnt have done all this without the fight and without God lighting up my day, rescuing me and even forgiving me when i wanted to give up.

  • @chicanica2000
    @chicanica2000 10 місяців тому +128

    “We leave God when we fantasize.” 💀 so good!!!

    • @denniskariuki4215
      @denniskariuki4215 10 місяців тому

      some of this revelations are straight from someone’s ass and not from God.
      christians really need to wake up😂😂😂
      the whole concept of heaven it’s that its created from fantasy, for example angels with wings, streets of gold , flowers singing and praising God e.t.c
      so when someone says “we leave God when we fantasize” is bs because its a false truth

  • @jemimajanvier4706
    @jemimajanvier4706 10 місяців тому +28

    Fantasies strip the beauty and purity of what is good, what is to be enjoyed and makes it filthy. For me it’s music. I am a constant daydreamer and have used music to fantasize, I will literally run around my room, throwing things in the air lost in a song while fantasizing about a different life. It began to feel like self idolization and like I was drunken. Even when I listened to worship music I was more occupied with imagining myself performing the song rather than praising God. I was ignoring this video for a while but I knew I needed it.

  • @WritewithKali
    @WritewithKali 5 місяців тому +80

    When you talked about Sin being a flower, it struck a chord with me. For the past year, I've been fantasizing about 'romantic' relationships under the cover of 'writing.' I'd go to bed roleplaying romantic scenes in my head and how I'd write them for my book. I've gone over almost every intimate scene I can think of to the point where I became physically attracted to my fantasies (And you know how that goes lol. I'm not explaining myself.)
    I've been desperate to write romance novels since I was a kid and it's stuck with me. Recently I began exploring other genres and I realized, besides biblical theology, everything leads back to romance in my head.
    The antagonistic neighbor next door who might be a serial killer. ROMANCE
    The broody professor who's planning on failing your college papers? ROMANCE
    and by ROMANCE, I mean 18+. Not just kiss and goodbye. (Something Is wrong with me.)
    And just like watering, I'm sure one day, I'd so something stupid like write pages and publish it somewhere and then someone would read it which will fuel my desire to write a book. Before you know it, BAMN... Everyone is reading my 18+ books... The thought of it sounds disappointing to my own ears.
    But one day I pulled out Reedsy and began to write about God. After 4+ hours later, I was on chapter 5 with over 17,000 words. I was amazed by this. Obviously, no romance but I loved writing this more than anything.
    It just shocked me how much I could change in an instant.
    My overall thoughts are, thank you for making this video. I'm still struggling with sin (sometimes I try to justify it. I'll work on it. I feel ashamed to pray because I've been over this many times. God is probably tired of me at this point.)

    • @chinazo5100
      @chinazo5100 5 місяців тому +20

      No, he's not!!!
      He's the reason you saw this video. You're currently surrounded by witnesses in this journey in Christ.
      'We' are surrounded. You're on the path to redemption! We all are,

    • @happiness4654
      @happiness4654 4 місяці тому +5

      I also dream of becoming a writer❤️. I pray that you will become more comfortable and that you will grow with your relationship with the Father and no, He’s not tired of you. He loves you and adores you, please never give up. I’d love to read your books someday.

    • @ThePottersClay_
      @ThePottersClay_ 4 місяці тому +10

      Yah is not tired of you! He loves you. if He didn’t love you nor wanted to hear your prayers, He wouldn’t have never sent you to this video! Trust in The Most High. Those thoughts are coming from the devil you have to know that you are being heard and recorded by Yah’s Holy watchers and angels, For you to to want to fight this off gives Him a chance to SHOW you who you’ve been praying to. Keep your head up, continue searching for Him, read your scriptures, run from the temptation and believe that He can deliver you from this stronghold! and watch Him reveal so much to you.

    • @yeonake
      @yeonake 4 місяці тому +1

      I'm a writer too, I know how you feel

    • @leaharayahu1983
      @leaharayahu1983 4 місяці тому +4

      I 100% relate. The crazy part is, I’m largely disinterested in real life romantic relationships, but I’m obsessed with writing them. It’s been weirding me out, but I’m not shocked what I’ve been doing is wrong.

  • @rossyvidea
    @rossyvidea Місяць тому +8

    "The things I fantasized about usually circle around the things that I've lacked in" okay that got me😪

  • @pauline354
    @pauline354 10 місяців тому +115

    "My fantasies circulate around the lack and the grieving process of me not having stable men in my life."
    That's so true..

    • @pauline354
      @pauline354 10 місяців тому

      13:14

    • @pauline354
      @pauline354 10 місяців тому

      Are your fantasies yours or are they just a projection of your flesh? 52:11

  • @naomia472
    @naomia472 10 місяців тому +118

    The lie we believe is that this fantasy will fulfill our needs. It never does. Yet we still believe maybe it might. It never will. Sometimes we use fantasy to escape the pain we have felt from the fantasy. Lord, help us free us from this bondage and forgive us. Draw us closer to you and increase your presence in our life.

  •  10 місяців тому +105

    The way I was fighting the algorithm for the longest time to not watch this video? I could not escape it, I finally caved in and watched. And look at that, I could relate to the topic (and the struggle)😅😂 Thank you for your obedience 🙏🏾

    • @latifatolamide6749
      @latifatolamide6749 10 місяців тому +5

      Same here

    • @brittany4104
      @brittany4104 6 місяців тому +2

      Same

    • @ciirumuturi159
      @ciirumuturi159 4 місяці тому

      Me too!! Been dodging it for the last week and have been praying to God about my mind, caved in today and decided to watch. A BLESSING! Exactly what I needed to hear ❤

  • @lhozahoro5788
    @lhozahoro5788 10 місяців тому +139

    ENTERTAINING THE FOURPLAY TO YOUR SIN IS WIIIIIIILD!!!! That’s so profound

  • @primrosealicemakaipa7159
    @primrosealicemakaipa7159 10 місяців тому +136

    Really needed this i literally wasted a almost whole year fanatising about a guy😭and I got distracted from everything only to find out he never even liked me😭😭

  • @meekmeek8198
    @meekmeek8198 10 місяців тому +522

    Aye sometimes we need that reminder! Thanks for the reminder, sis! I am definitely guilty of the sexual fantasies, revenge fantasies, idolizing marriage and interests and I repent, confess, ask the LORD for forgiveness and turn away from the sin. In the name if Jesus, I pray, AMEN!

  • @hajabah6880
    @hajabah6880 9 місяців тому +115

    Girl you definitely hit a lot of targets!! I feel like now a days fantasizing / being delusional or acting delusional is being pushed out more and more and starting to be normalized! It’s being used as a weapon against people to keep them bounded by their mind and thoughts to distance themselves more away from God! Thank you for this podcast dear sister. God bless you.

  • @BerylWankollie-wp9lt
    @BerylWankollie-wp9lt 3 місяці тому +7

    I was literally looking for a love playlist to fantasize with when I mistakenly clicked this video and I'm in Awe especially when she mentioned a verse I read that melts me as well "James 1:14-15"

  • @jamicadogan3074
    @jamicadogan3074 10 місяців тому +242

    This a coping method almost similar to malipdaptive day dreaming ! Thank you for the biblical perspective! It’s so hard to stop pray for me

    • @rosaela-daughterinchrist
      @rosaela-daughterinchrist 10 місяців тому +5

      Thats what I have 😢😢

    • @karinarinarina
      @karinarinarina 10 місяців тому +14

      I feel you!!! I will keep you in prayer!! I still struggle, but God has given me break through this summer as to what causes it for me. Whenever I am having issues with my dad, I slip into this! I am recognizing I need to deal with things that are hard for me right then and there, and NOT let it fester inside. I felt I was a victim to it and that I could not go about my daily life without doing it, but I finally surrendered it over to the Lord. I made the decision in my heart to let go and separate myself emotionally from it. It is NOT REAL and it is NOT how the Lord views or defines me.

    • @pheladietherealmatlala4541
      @pheladietherealmatlala4541 10 місяців тому +18

      I struggled with maladaptive daydreaming as well. I’m now at that phase where I literally have the upper hand. It wasn’t easy,and at times I wasn’t patient enough. I thought it was something I could do on my own but NOPE,God saw me through it all. I overestimated my power and actually found that through weakness,God is my strength. PRAYER & FASTING do help… talking it out with others makes you realise how unrealistic it is. It used to be so bad…worse cases… but yoh 👏🏾 God really helped. Just be patient & honest with yourself, pray & give it all to Jesus. He delivers👏🏾♥️🥀

    • @nyaneban4694
      @nyaneban4694 10 місяців тому +5

      Pleass pray for me as well. I have been doing this for years. I really thought I was the only one.

    • @alessshorts
      @alessshorts 10 місяців тому +23

      @@karinarinarina I struggle with this too, and I realize that it comes from a place of sort of boredom, but mainly feeling alone. As my daydreams are sort of realistic, about finding a good person to be around, and even good friends. And then another part of it was me kind of accomplishing things, so I think that deep down I have insecurity and I feel like I’m not good enough plus some childhood trauma. But I know God loves us and we’re worthy because we are his children. Another thing I’m doing as well is for example I want to gain weight and look a little bit different and I always daydream about that so instead of just daydreaming about that I will put that into action so it’s almost like my daydreams are coming true in a sense

  • @leahmojo2178
    @leahmojo2178 10 місяців тому +331

    This actually hurt my feelings because I’ve been in love with my fantasies because they’re always here for me 😭 waiting on God and having my fantasies in the mean time have offset the frustrations of the wait. Giving it up literally is death and I - whew 🥹😭 going to sob.

    • @2handle.
      @2handle. 10 місяців тому +34

      OMG me too! I'm 34 and I feel God will never give me a husband. I have 2 kids and have been single for 12 years. I hate being single and alone and I'm sick of waiting. Fantasizing takes the edge off somewhat

    • @leahmojo2178
      @leahmojo2178 10 місяців тому +66

      @@2handle. I’m 32. A virgin, single since 20. Grew up fatherless - helping my mom out w bills. Fantasizing comes so naturally to me. Doesn’t help that every hobby I’ve ever had is all imaginative lol it’s a very trained muscle, but yes, it’s also my favorite lover. Never thought I’d have to give it to God in this way. But I try to remind myself He’s worth what He asks for. It’s definitely a process.

    • @cellamoore
      @cellamoore 10 місяців тому +26

      No literally...and now it's just a reminder that we're supposed to wholeheartedly in mind, spirit, sould, wait on the Lord...focus on the Lord. And realizing I really havent been doing that for a long time

    • @xavierthomas5835
      @xavierthomas5835 10 місяців тому +18

      Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD. Psalm 27:14
      Wait on the LORD, and keep his way, and he shall exalt thee to inherit the land: when the wicked are cut off, thou shalt see it. Psalm 37:34

    • @TheLadyCheriNoir
      @TheLadyCheriNoir 10 місяців тому +23

      Every time you want to fantasize, speak out-loud scriptures such as Philippians 4:8, 1 Corinthians 10:5-6, & 1 Corinthians 6:18 for example. Praise the LORD when you are tempted to go to your mental default safe-space to get you through something. This is also a stronghold, so you should also study the Bible on how to tear its power over you down. With CHRIST, all things are possible for those who believe & Faith without putting in the work is dead.

  • @pettypuppyjonghyun
    @pettypuppyjonghyun 9 місяців тому +40

    It wasnt until you mentioned fantasizing conversations that i realized what message God was tryna send to me 😭 I have been "mentally preparing" myself for all these different bad scenarios lately and its been hurting so bad. I pray to God to guide me and let it be His way, but then hurt myself so much preparing for the worst outcome. I really needed this wakeup call

  • @kaitlyns1145
    @kaitlyns1145 8 місяців тому +19

    You’re so right, and addressing fantasies BEFORE marriage is awesome! God has been dealing with me about my own unrealistic ideas of marriage and Fantasized expectations i have of my husband. I grew up LOVING a good Hallmark love story (especially the Christmas ones 😂❤) and I’ve been unintentionally putting this romantic expectations on my husband and leaving myself feeling like my marriage is lacking when in reality, he is an amazing, hardworking, loving man but marriage is not a hallmark movie- no matter how godly! It is work and growing together alone can be tough but so rewarding!

  • @realkyraful
    @realkyraful 10 місяців тому +88

    I didn't notice it but I fantasized less and less when I spent more time with God. Now when I'm about to I catch myself

  • @nickolasdavis4
    @nickolasdavis4 10 місяців тому +162

    As a man this still blessed me. Thank you. I always come against fantasies with a firm faith. Imagination isn’t evil . But it can be without submission. Let us continue to submit everything to Christ (and I mean everythinggggg) so that we can grown in our faith rather than our fantasy!

    • @Isaiah53_John3.16_ChangeUrLife
      @Isaiah53_John3.16_ChangeUrLife 9 місяців тому +7

      Such a fire line right there:
      "Imagination isn't evil, but it can be without submission." !!
      I totally agree with you. This is something the Lord has been teaching me 😭

  • @deidremsibi571
    @deidremsibi571 8 місяців тому +22

    I recently listened to one of Benny Hinn’s teachings and he was specifically talking about the mind and one thing he said really stood out to me “if it’s not the truth, it does not belong in your mind” 🙌🏽 I have been living by that ever since I heard it 🤌🏽

  • @shantewilliams602
    @shantewilliams602 10 місяців тому +26

    I definitely NEEDED to see/hear this. I have been maladaptive daydreaming since I was young. I never knew the name for it until recent.

  • @ayo3able
    @ayo3able 10 місяців тому +433

    I knew this was going to be good when my flesh curled up like a gremlin at the TITLE !! ❤ Love you Lord, thank you for this word.

    • @celesteessel4500
      @celesteessel4500 10 місяців тому +22

      FACTS LOL…. knew I had to click

    • @ogechukwuokpala9607
      @ogechukwuokpala9607 10 місяців тому +4

      Me too 😮

    • @jemeisha2013
      @jemeisha2013 10 місяців тому +1

      Girl same! 😂

    • @benedictakissi1955
      @benedictakissi1955 9 місяців тому +13

      Same. I literally had to clench my jaw and force myself to sit and watch. I have no doubt its God's message for me lol. It rings so true

    • @ashontesjones3328
      @ashontesjones3328 9 місяців тому +11

      Girlll sameeeee. I’ve been seeing this video for over a week and I’ve been avoiding it but deep down I knew I needed to watch it.

  • @user-vs5mi8bk1f
    @user-vs5mi8bk1f 10 місяців тому +170

    The timing of this in my life is crazy. Thank you!!!

  • @magneticmoonstone
    @magneticmoonstone 6 місяців тому +18

    What really helps is to understand what exact need you're fulfilling through a fantasy and then working with this analysis. I usually ask myself "Why am I thinking of it?" when I realise I'm daydreaming.
    For example, when I'm dreaming of a love life, I recognise the need to be loved. Then I can think of it rationally and remind myself that I don't need anyone to feel loved and that it's not the time for a love life for me rn because I focus on other things.
    Also, I often dream of other people saying something about my art and that's how my need for recognition is being fulfilled. Now I catch the thought and think deeply: do I need this recognition? What can I do to achieve it? Should I detach from it or start acting on it?
    It really helps to turn fantasises into thoughts that are more rational and can have an actual influence for bettering your life. It also helps you to deal with the REASONS of why these fantasies appear and not with the fantasies themselves. The second option is pointless cause you can't ignore or deny them forever.

  • @lexireese7382
    @lexireese7382 3 місяці тому +5

    being creative is a blessing having a mind that can pick and create things is amazing when used for God!

  • @Bre.995
    @Bre.995 10 місяців тому +121

    It’s formal names are Maladaptive daydreaming another severe form of it is Limerence. Struggled with it since I was a kid & it’s only amplified by my adhd & anxiety as well. It’s very hard to stop doing. Especially fantasizing relationships being that I haven’t had a stable real one ever.

    • @maliahjoy2959
      @maliahjoy2959 10 місяців тому +4

      This!!

    • @xavierthomas5835
      @xavierthomas5835 10 місяців тому +23

      For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7
      When I was going through anxiety attacks, because I was going through drug abuse problems, I meditated on this scripture. And God delivered me. The things the devil wants to invade and overcome our life are not of any concern to God. These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world. John 16:33

    • @SweetImmaculateHeart
      @SweetImmaculateHeart 10 місяців тому +21

      I only learned about Limerence two days ago when a video on it popped up in my feed and it shook me so hard realizing that I had been doing some degree of that my whole life. (I have ADHD as well and have suffered from clinical depression, anxiety, and self harm in my past.) I had actually saved a few videos to watch more about the topic but couldnt bring myself to check them out yet. I resonated with the clinical description, but as a Christian I was wondering what a biblical perspective on this would be and I wanted to find truth for myself not just psychological jargon to give me anxiety. (Plus I'm sure I was avoiding the conviction I knew I would likely experience if I learned more.)
      "Coincidentally" I have been struggling in my prayer life, experiencing bouts of depression and anxiety the past month, and spending more time consuming movies and music as an escape rather than leaning into God, but I did pray about that specifically and ask God to show me what exactly was hindering my relationship with Him lately. Why my heart was suddenly growing cold. Then this video just showed up this morning.
      God speaks. He is faithful, always.

  • @Leticia.melo6
    @Leticia.melo6 10 місяців тому +367

    I’ve always been happier in my own imagination.. and God really really keeps digging and showing me that reality with Him is much better and has a real purpose. This was spot on. Thank you and God bless!

    • @cellamoore
      @cellamoore 10 місяців тому +25

      😭🥺❤that was beautifully worded "reality with him is much better..." phew let me accept this as true

    • @xavierthomas5835
      @xavierthomas5835 10 місяців тому +5

      Amen and amen. You speaking words of life, sister.

    • @CMangwende_
      @CMangwende_ 10 місяців тому +5

      Amen🥹

    • @sermonsdusabbat
      @sermonsdusabbat 10 місяців тому +6

      @Leticia.melo6 I can so relate to that, "always been happier in my own imagination". God help us.

    • @xavierthomas5835
      @xavierthomas5835 10 місяців тому

      @@sermonsdusabbat amen

  • @user-ge9sr4zh9l
    @user-ge9sr4zh9l 2 місяці тому +4

    God forgive me in fact i ve being foreplaying my sins Lord ve mercy upon me .I really needed this message God bless you ❤❤❤

  • @gracelovesgaia5117
    @gracelovesgaia5117 4 місяці тому +6

    “you’re just not being put on game… if you don’t step up!” Oh my goodness lol I love this woman

  • @aishautube
    @aishautube 10 місяців тому +60

    I’ve always had this problem since I was child and it’s always hindered me from actually achieving the things that I want🥲

  • @SuccessfulShay
    @SuccessfulShay 10 місяців тому +148

    Such a taboo topic that I never thought others actually deal with. Thank you for being a voice for many of us who are dealing and/or healed from this.

  • @mirandapanda__
    @mirandapanda__ 10 місяців тому +48

    You made me laugh about the fantasizing using music that is sooooo me. I used to have a playlist called “Imagination” playlist where I did nothing but create delusions 😂😂 I’m embarrassed about it after hearing this podcast but the truth sets you free 😂 I’m taking tons of notes!!! Thank you so much for sharing this, it’s a huge struggle, but no mountain is ever too big for God, God bless you sister 💖🥺

  • @sosophrank
    @sosophrank 8 місяців тому +5

    The first person to address this in this way. The fantasy of making lots of money and taking care of your family. Buying your parents a house, etc. Not taking into account God's will & purpose for you.

  • @heydanilion
    @heydanilion 10 місяців тому +574

    Ooooooh! Fantasizing about the conversations with the people who hurt me - so guilty.
    Or fantasizing about the “perfect” situation I’m waiting for so that I “can finally do what God is telling me to do”.
    Woooooow this is so good!

    • @Yazminnn_
      @Yazminnn_ 10 місяців тому +12

      Mannn so true I’ve done it beyond count 🤦🏾‍♀️!

    • @jemimadeolinda1787
      @jemimadeolinda1787 10 місяців тому +8

      It's wild!!

    • @lilathinks7477
      @lilathinks7477 10 місяців тому

      EXACTLY

    • @xavierthomas5835
      @xavierthomas5835 10 місяців тому +14

      I was stuck in a cycle of wanting to do things God wants me to do and then thinking about doing. And I would literally miss opportunities because I would be fantasizing about what I was gonna do.

    • @jemimadeolinda1787
      @jemimadeolinda1787 10 місяців тому +9

      @@xavierthomas5835 God convicted me of the same thing. You're not alone. 🙏🏾 What God taught me was it's not the call we should be pursuing. We should be careful that we don't seek the call above God in the name of 'desiring to be used by God'. Thats deception. The call of God is great but God's more concerned about our relationship with Him and us abiding in Christ's love which grows only by us meditating in His word. This is where He builds our character for His glory to do all these things. Seek a relationship with Him through the word and He will empower you to do the rest. Cause its not by our strength but by the Spirit and the Word in us. Check this: It's the word in us that empowers us IN the Spirit. We can do nothing apart from the word, and that being word being Jesus. Stay in Jesus. I pray this encourages Xavier 🙌🏾

  • @manilla2054
    @manilla2054 10 місяців тому +331

    Girlll, this is so good. I think that Woman need to talk more about this. I believe that women’s fantasy is as detrimental to our walk as Pornography with men. No one talks about it much. Soo thanks for doing so and letting us know, we are not alone. A lot of us do it

    • @cellamoore
      @cellamoore 10 місяців тому +26

      No I sooo agree with that. Because I wouldn't turn to porn, I'd just create fantasies in my head but even then I could feel it's not fruitful and if anything it's more distracting cuz I can keep my mind focused on that for much longer

    • @maricelavelazquez4871
      @maricelavelazquez4871 10 місяців тому +14

      Amen sisters! Ive been saying this (or the Lord has). That women lust just as much as men but our own seduction really starts in our minds and our fantasies subconsciously seduce men once we see them. The devil is in our subtleties. We are just as guilty!

    • @Nana-kx4hc
      @Nana-kx4hc 4 місяці тому

      Men watch porn women create it in their heads we might as well watch it

  • @slimilacraft7676
    @slimilacraft7676 2 місяці тому +3

    I am so grateful you shared this young lady. I think I’ve been in my head fantasizing, most of my life. Some things actually coming true and some having become hurtful to myself and others. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you!

  • @keyladeneen59
    @keyladeneen59 3 місяці тому +5

    "Satan is probably gorgeous"......wow😩
    This is so good and describes me to a T and this was right on time....i have been in the same cycle almost 13 years and I was willingly putting myself in this cycle through fantasy. I needed to see this today because I was headed down the same path once again.
    Thank God for this and His commitment to our freedom ❤

  • @DaughterofZion0487
    @DaughterofZion0487 10 місяців тому +323

    This…… this is a quiet struggle for soooooo many of us. For me, sexual fantasies were the biggest issue since I was 7 years old, and it came from music. The strange thing for me is that I never acted on these sexual fantasies, but I would always have them and it mainly came from slow jams, R&B and Hip Hop music and celebrity crushes. I thought it would go away when I got married, but I still struggle with it. Since May of this year, I gave up worldly music for good and submitted it to God but now there’s a man that I know of but do not know personally but strongly have a physical attraction and I’m always fantasizing about him. It’s something that I’m pleading with Yahweh to deliver me from it because I’m a happily married woman, but imma keep on praying and seeking and I will be delivered from it. This is why I’m convinced to believe that worldly music are spiritually binding us and dulling us especially sexual worldly music, very dangerous. Ever since I was 7, I realized when I listen to certain R&B songs it takes a hold on me and I’m dancing in ways I shouldn’t be dancing or moving. As an eight year old, I would dance sexually and touch myself every time I listened to a TLC song, Xscape song, Jodeci, Adina Howard, SWV, Silk and more and I didn’t realize how destructive it is. I try not to completely blame my parents for exposing worldly music to us because they were not saved then, but when they got saved and got strict, they never removed the worldly music from the home. So, what my prayer is how we get delivered from it.
    May God bless you for being bold and speaking out and ministering to many of us who struggle with this quietly.

    • @noaifekoya
      @noaifekoya 10 місяців тому +12

      This!! I've been experiencing something of this sort due to world music

    • @DaughterOfChristJesus
      @DaughterOfChristJesus 10 місяців тому +12

      I went through this with my family too , you’re not alone . Keep praying, God will heal you 🫶🏽

    • @caleb9472
      @caleb9472 10 місяців тому +14

      Ask the holy spirit for strength

    • @SuccessfulShay
      @SuccessfulShay 10 місяців тому +15

      Wow! I relate to this a lot. I honestly thought something was wrong with me (mentally) cause I just knew “people don’t go through things like this, such as fantasizing”
      I’ve been struggling with this very young too and at 28 I find my mind creeping back at times. You are definitely right, it’s in the music!

    • @jo-qamyasharala8059
      @jo-qamyasharala8059 10 місяців тому +8

      I literally ruined my life because of this. Pray for my family.

  • @bellanoche6797
    @bellanoche6797 10 місяців тому +152

    I hope more young women hear and heed this message because before you know it, you’ll be 50 years old like me and just realizing you’ve been living in fantasy land your whole life with very little to show for it 😢

    • @georgina4874
      @georgina4874 10 місяців тому +17

      37. And yes, I focused on stopping this behavior about 12 days ago.💕💕🙏🏽 God is amazing.

    • @jeremiahogbadu
      @jeremiahogbadu 5 місяців тому +9

      It must be tough having that realization at 50, but I want to encourage you with ‭Isaiah‬ ‭43: 18‭-‬19‬ --- Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.
      Stay strong, God is always ready to lead you. The longer you wallow in regret, the more years you give yourself to regret over in the future. God bless.

    • @bellanoche6797
      @bellanoche6797 5 місяців тому +3

      @@jeremiahogbaduthank you, your reply was a very kind and timely message that I needed

    • @jeremiahogbadu
      @jeremiahogbadu 5 місяців тому +1

      @@bellanoche6797 you're welcome, thank God. God bless.

    • @dalpaengi
      @dalpaengi 5 місяців тому +5

      The fact that you’re here now…that means so much. It means so much to me here 5 months late. The fact that you took the time to share your wisdom here so earnestly demonstrates the wonderful attribute of compassion.
      I think any sincere tendency towards true loving kindness must be have been placed in the heart by the Lord.
      God loves you so much. I’m older than 35 now and I’m disabled so I have often worried about being a waste of space. But I know that’s the enemies lie.
      We gotta remember that God doesn’t make junk!
      He has a plan for you when you surrender to Him ❤ The fact that He numbers the hairs on our head is incredible.

  • @jbuzz7966
    @jbuzz7966 8 місяців тому +14

    I fantasise a lot about happy marriage and pregnancy so much. But recently I feel like it’s been affecting me badly and I have been praying about it, and me watching this video is Gods answer to my prayers. I will take action on it because I’m sick of being like this now. There’s so much more into this whole fantasising stuff. For me, I have a very active and creative brain that’s how it started. But I need to stop it

  • @DanitaLynette
    @DanitaLynette 7 місяців тому +15

    So glad you are BOLD in the word with this! This is bible study. I struggled with this, but just recently decided to cut out secular movies that aren't clean. But with me it starts with a guy I start regarding highly. God snapped me out of the fantasy. I saw the truth of it and decided no more. I desire godliness acknowledging and leaning on the power of God. Definitely gonna revisit this one. Very good.

  • @paigeau7516
    @paigeau7516 10 місяців тому +71

    Perfect timing with stumbling upon this video. The Lord has been heavily convicting my about my unhinged imagination. It has been adding fuel to a lot of my sin. I daydream and imagine A. LOT. and it's a major coping mechanism to stress and struggle. Really, my imagination is heavily fueling my pride bc I'm thinking I can make a better reality than God; creating this false world in my head simply bc I do not like this one. I fantasize bc I don't like the season or situation I'm in. Lord have mercy 😓

    • @thefeminineeye
      @thefeminineeye 10 місяців тому +9

      thats so deeo,,,fueling pride thinking I can make a better reality than God

    • @whitneysculfield7009
      @whitneysculfield7009 9 місяців тому +2

      me too ! your not alone and im thankful we have found this

  • @ericbless
    @ericbless 10 місяців тому +69

    Once you inherit the spirit of God, you will discern every open door of the enemy in your life and you will shun them. Seek God and don't stop because the enemy looking for whom he might devour. The world is not your home.

  • @kaliha.j
    @kaliha.j 3 місяці тому +4

    The body can’t tell the difference when something is actually happening and when it’s just a thought, the chemicals it creates are the same😩So those feelings you create from your fantasies are giving your body a rehearsal run basically. If you wanna understand more about the mind and body working together I highly recommend Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself by Dr. Joe Dispenza

  • @AndyApples.
    @AndyApples. 6 місяців тому +6

    The way I ran to my Pinterest to delete the boards that I were filled with pictures of fantasies and went to instagram to block and restrict content that I find to be tempting and fantasy. When you said “I cannot be in the proximity of your behavior because it tempts me” I felt that deep within. I fear making people feel bad but I’m growing to learn that my walk with God is not going to make everyone comfortable and I should be able to say God matters more, and this cannot be made more important then what God wants of me. I have been completely running away from this video for a month now but I’m glad I took time today. God bless you

    • @HoneyBunRoad
      @HoneyBunRoad 6 місяців тому +1

      Girl, I have to delete a whole Pinterest board 😅 it's hard out here!!!!

  • @tracyjacquet1902
    @tracyjacquet1902 10 місяців тому +50

    Gurl….GURL!!!!! You hit me deep in the soul. Ima tell you a story that just happened to me like last week.
    My car battery died outside of my job I wanna say this past Monday. It was already late so worrying about it wasn’t gonna do me justice. I disregarded it Tuesday because I didn’t have time, and my brother and I went on Wednesday to see if we could jump it. Car gave us no juice. We called triple A, and the guy couldn’t access the battery because of the screws. He didn’t have a rachet or socket wrench to disassemble anything. Thursday morning I read a page from my 30 day of getting a closer relationship with God, and we talked about fear.
    I admitted to God that in the intimate areas of my life [transparency I struggle with the sin of masturbation], I was scared that God would punish me for the sexual life I lived by giving me a guy who couldn’t live up to the fantasies [mind you these fantasies came from porn] I played out in my mind. In that moment, I realized that I had an issue with sexual fantasy. In that fear, I resulted to masturbation because if my future relationships would fail in the sex department, at least I could do it myself. See how foolish that thinking is? Because in thinking that way, I’m literally leading myself to my downfall because of the perversion I’m keeping myself in by committing the sexual sin and not trusting God. The book then tells us a story, and the woman narrating ends off her prayer with “God, whatever happens now I’ll praise you because I trust you.” And after the reading her story [she had car problems], I cried to God. Her story touched my heart in a way I didn’t think it would because it showed me how much faith I lacked in my Father who hadn’t failed me ever since I was born. How could I tell God that I don’t trust him when he’s proven every single time that he’s trustworthy?
    That Thursday, because my dad was in dialysis and my brother was at work, I had to replace the car battery myself. Now I’m not saying being a mechanic is only a man’s job, but I could tell that it broke my mom’s heart watching me be “the man” in that moment because we had no one else to help us. And every time she started to cry and get sad, I had to keep reminding her that God is with us. That whatever happens, we will praise him because we trust him. After three hours, and repeating that mantra every time my patience was tested, I replaced my car battery and got my car working again. Through all that stress, I masturbated because it was a safety net. And the moment I finished, something in me just clicked to finally hand this burden over to God.
    Now I know it’s like “wait what?” But as I went into my notes to write down my triggers to this sin, I realized how much fantasies truly played in this struggle. I masturbated that day because I didn’t want to be “the man”. I wanted to be a woman, and to stay in my femininity. When I read out my triggers again and invited the Lord into this conversation, it finally helped me realize the root of my masturbation problem: fantasies through fear. This episode specifically has popped up on my page for a while, I wanna say this past week. So whoever decides to read this all the way through, just know that you aren’t alone in your struggles. That although we may not see each other face to face, that men and women in Christ will always lend a hand to those who think they’re alone in their struggles.
    You are not alone, and were never meant to be alone. Gen 2:15-18, and Ecclesiastes 4:9-12. Don’t ever let the enemy trick you into thinking your struggles are just unique to you. Trust me? They’re not. This is currently Day 2 of being free from the sin of masturbation, which I know is like nothing to some, but means so much to me and God ❤

    • @oluwatomiloba9115
      @oluwatomiloba9115 4 місяці тому +4

      Proud of you!.
      May God keep you!

    • @luvvash_
      @luvvash_ 4 місяці тому +2

      Thank you for sharing your story. Knowing I’m not alone has been incredibly comforting. I pray you continue to grow stronger in your faith. Lean on Him🤎🤎

  • @alyvaliente4459
    @alyvaliente4459 10 місяців тому +86

    Man!!! The lord is using you my girl! I really thought I was the only one who was going through this ! And I prayed to God this morning and this video just came up !!! Thank you for obeying his voice !! 🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍

    • @rosaela-daughterinchrist
      @rosaela-daughterinchrist 10 місяців тому +4

      You're not alone I've been going through this since elementary

    • @Aliciaaaaaa
      @Aliciaaaaaa 10 місяців тому +2

      Me too i prayed about this too this morning !!!

  • @lydianoel9060
    @lydianoel9060 6 днів тому +1

    I’m only a few minutes in and I’m already speechless. The Lord is speaking through you. This is amazing.

  • @Kel-xj1xl
    @Kel-xj1xl 8 місяців тому +6

    The Holy Spirit said to give up the secular musics because of the fantasizing, now I can see how this is impact me. It's so hard to waive a sin that brings momentary pleasure, especially because it satisfazes the flesh and desire, but God has been so good for me, I believe in His plans❤🙏

  • @roxannesmith4519
    @roxannesmith4519 10 місяців тому +56

    As Lauryn Hill said “fantasy is what people want, reality is what people need”.

  • @XielleBertrand
    @XielleBertrand 10 місяців тому +61

    I had to pause the video to comment because this is so so so real! Especially at 15:36 I used to and still spend hours day dreaming and fantasizing about my future life, my husband, what my kids would look like and it never left/leaves me joyful, you're always kinda left there grieving something that never even existed. Every word she's said up to the time stamp above has been so real to me and it was so cool of God to suggest me this in this season of realization I am in.

  • @cmdub0257
    @cmdub0257 3 місяці тому +6

    Girl get out my business, thank you God for deliverance

  • @malik_kin11
    @malik_kin11 4 місяці тому +4

    "So a man thinks, so will he be"

  • @lyricgenius1670
    @lyricgenius1670 10 місяців тому +64

    52:00 - 52:09 “are your fantasies really yours or are they just a projection of your flesh?” My goodness that was THE statement of this podcast. Wow!! This was also my first episode watching a really good topic. Thank you for allowing him to speak through you.

    • @barbaragriffith1609
      @barbaragriffith1609 7 місяців тому +2

      Sometimes we can fantasize about what the heart truly wants, like real love or a fulfilling and meaningful life BUT try to fulfil it apart from Christ - without questioning if it is the RIGHT WAY to do so. That's where God and His WORD come in. Knowing how to move forward comes from submitting our desires to Him first, praying about it and using scripture to LEAD us to the happiness which first and foremost can ONLY be found IN Him and THROUGH Him!
      Submit - Pray - Study - Obey and LET HIM LEAD THE WAY!!

    • @jeeperscreepers-jj3bz
      @jeeperscreepers-jj3bz 6 місяців тому

      The EXACT moment she said that I read your comment

  • @bLopezzz
    @bLopezzz 4 місяці тому +4

    I wish I had friends were we could just have honest and real convos. So refreshing. This relaxes me a lot and made me laugh because you stated some facts! 😂

  • @ChristsBelovedDaughter
    @ChristsBelovedDaughter 8 днів тому +1

    Gosh. Was praying to the Lord earlier cause I could feel my flesh being strong today, to help me with my heart. Was NOT expecting to get called out this bad 😂

  • @shavezequeenbellamy7708
    @shavezequeenbellamy7708 10 місяців тому +26

    This is where the book Atomic Habits could come in to help. The book talks about making a bad habit invisible or difficult to reach. So in order to start the process of cutting out the fantasies, we have to cut out/stop watching and listening to movies, videos and songs that trigger the thoughts. I'm only 22 minutes in, so I don't know yet was has been said, but this is just too good to watch all the way through and not say anything LOL!!! Thank you!!

  • @Yazminnn_
    @Yazminnn_ 10 місяців тому +83

    I’m only fourteen minutes in and chileeee God was speaking alllll through this & it made me realize just how deep in idolatry I was in 🤦🏾‍♀️🔥

  • @preethiprez
    @preethiprez 6 місяців тому +9

    Wow and here I was thinking I was the only one caught up in my fantasies. For anyone who is also struggling with romantic fantasizing another term for it is known as “limerence”.
    Well thank you so much Emy for being honest and vulnerable here. To all the women and men struggling with fantasies, I pray for your strength and courage to crucify these thoughts. You are so deeply loved and cared for!

  • @MsTropicalRookie
    @MsTropicalRookie 9 місяців тому +9

    Never searched for this video or topic but it was recommended to me. Here I am. This is one of my daily struggles for years. I've spent so many years, from childhood, cultivating this habit that it's the easiest thing to slip into and justify because the enemy deceives us into thinking it's not real because its only our thoughts but the scripture that says, "As a man thinketh in his heart so is he" is so convicting. I realize i fantasize less when I'm not indulging in things that feed certain fantasies. Dreams play a role in this too but thats another topic.

  • @_KidoftheKingdom_
    @_KidoftheKingdom_ 10 місяців тому +41

    So real!! You can keep chopping that flower but you have to uproot it altogether for it to be gone. I struggled with this and I prayed about it and God has been helping me at every step, but it started with me being honest with myself

  • @AlyssaGSW
    @AlyssaGSW 10 місяців тому +79

    This provided revelation for me on a deep level. God answered my prayer this morning with this video. I prayed that he would show me my hidden sins. I prayed that he would show me what was keeping me from my next level. Then this popped up on the timeline. Wow! Your obedience in making this video is such a blessing!

  • @thewanderer1712
    @thewanderer1712 3 місяці тому +2

    Snapping back and realizing it's not real probably really messes with your mind mentally, make your own self depressed conjuring up theses ideas or worlds that don't exist...

  • @daniellehelberg
    @daniellehelberg 3 місяці тому +3

    Emy girl, this is the second time I am watching this. The previous time God gave me a different revelation to now. This is such a multi seasonal word. Thank you❤

  • @myleishabolden8593
    @myleishabolden8593 10 місяців тому +198

    i’m so glad you touched on this. it’s so real and needs to be discussed more