Parenting Tips for Toddlers: 5 Essential Rules for Communicating With Young Children
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- Опубліковано 30 чер 2014
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Welcome! I'm Lori, and I founded Teach Through Love because I'm passionate about helping adults resolve daily conflicts and nurture children's development by using conscious communication.
Parents, teachers, and caregivers are the most influential people in a child's life. My Conscious Parenting Courses and Communication Cards have helped thousands of parents and professionals break free of reactive patterns and unconscious beliefs about "discipline" that keep them stuck in negative cycles with kids.
I want to help adults increase cooperation and connection by communicating in ways that help kids feel heard and capable of change. We can help them reach their full potential and learn to solve conflicts and collaborate with others when we shift how we respond to their needs and feelings.
Lori Petro I TEACH through Love
Author / Educator / Child Advocate
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![[Parenting Tips] 5 Proven Ways to Encourage Responsible Behavior In Kids](/img/n.gif)
Re-fram ( from today.) Instead of demanding my 4 yr old gets out of the car by saying.." I asked you to get out of the car, I'm hot let's go now " I could have said. "I know you enjoy going for rides in the car, we are home now let's go in and get cooled down in the ac." Or " I know you like being in the car, its hot in there I can help you out of the car." Something like that. :)
I love it. I've been resorting to the 5 perps lately especially with my four year old during this transition with a new born. Poor guy. We have great moments but I ruin them when I use these 4 techniques. :( I'll have to watch this video more to get it down and get my confidence back on how to engage politely. Thank you!!
I believe that listening to "hear and understand" instead of listening to "respond" always helps in communication with everyone! Great video!
So true, Heather! Thanks for watching!
I can’t believe I’m only finding your channel so late in my mommy journey.. thank you so much for your amazing tips and advice!!!
So glad you made it, Sakina! Thank you for being here!
I have an adult ADHD with kids that are diagnosed with ADHD as well so you can just imagine the chaos at home daily but videos like these been helping me a lot. I also had to warn my husband and children when my mood isn't good. My kids are uncontrollable most of the times but they are good kids. For some reason, when you love your children, you can always find ways/solution to solve the problem and constantly fight your own demon to have that self control. Being constantly irritated, frustrated and stressed easily is a battle i have to overcome everyday but I really told my kids that we need to help each other and be understanding to each other. I also always have to warn them and tell them to ignore harsh words that comes out of my mouth when I can't control my anger because I don't mean any of it. Heart to heart talk is very important so that they understand deeply and we also educate ourselves about adhd. It really help
Really thankful for this. Thank you!
I've loved using your Calmer, Easier, Happier Parenting suggestions over the years for my daughter, thank you Noel!
Thanks for the great advice! Just finding your channel now but hey the advice still sticks!
Communication is everything! Well said.
Thank you :)
Although I very much appreciate the advice, the guilt of how I react at times to my 2.5 yo makes my heart hurt. I’m glad there are recourses like you to help parents learn to do better♥️
This makes so much sense, thank you !
Thanks for your video. I'm actually struggeling putting in action this kind of calmer parenting methods (my boys are 21months & 3 y-old) so your example is quite helpfull.
I needed this. Thank you
very insightful! as a young, learning mother, I needed this
thank you so much for this video
Thank you so much!!
Thank you for your wisdom! I'm a new dad that is raising a 1 yr old, he already throws daily tantrums, screams, and kicks/hits any chance he gets to express himself.. it's been very confusing for me, but your video has helped me find the courage to help my son learn from these feelings 🙏
Insightful look into this very important aspect of parenting, lord knows it is well appreciated
Instead of thinking and saying "I got to get away or leave, I can't take it, you are out of control, not listening", I will say "I'm never leaving you, we will get thru this together, what can we do together to help us feel better". Thanks so much for this piece of Gold, I'm implementing it immediately! I already feel the stress lifting!
I want to tattoo this on my arm! Brilliant! I was doing this the old way and couldn't figure out a better way. Thank you!
very helpful thanks
as a child education major this is very helpful to watch
Love this
Thank you
That was such great analysis of common parenting negativity and such helpful tips thank you! I need to memorize this!
I think EVERY PARENT does!
This is great!
Thank you I’m trying to be better for my baby and this helps so much
Yes, I'm struggling to reshape that. It's challenging because I was raised that way & our circumstances actually further perpetuate the "traditional" response. But I observe its negative effects so I'm willing to make the necessary adjustments for my son.
SO helpful! Thank you !
thanks for watching, Virginia!
I really like this
Finally a video with tips
My baby is 15 months and I’m living with my mom, who spanked/paddled us early. I’m finding that when I stop and breathe and do my best to communicate rather than commanding him to do things, he’s more receptive even though he’s doesn’t fully understand. I think Children really understand intent and they’re wired to communicate and connect.
I’ve been a terrible violator of these four. I need to be so, so much better as a parent.
This was brilliant. Thank you.
I started out training my son to read at Fourteen months. Though I`m hesitant about training him how to read at a very young age, I made a decision to acheive it and used this reading guide *4ChildrenReading. Com* He can now read a whole book without my help at 2 yrs and four months.?
Definitely helpful tips!
hey. I enjoyed your video about parenting kids. I have found useful information about parenting toddlers from Panlarko Teaching Toddlers Planner . You can search them on google using search phrase parenting a toddler
Fantastic...can't wait to try ur techniques
My partner is really proud of his son’s reading capabilities and he is sharing his story to everybody. We teach our son how to read with the aid of this phenomenal reading guide *4ChildrenReading. Com* We used to read to him before going to bed, but now he picks out his personal books and reads to us.
Hi Lori! Thanks for this video. It's nice there are videos like this to help parents with the essential parenting skill as this is one of the toughest skills to master. So just today, I got a call from my daughter's school and her teacher wants to meet up with me next week. I suspect that my daughter did something bad in school. And so I'm right coz when I talked to my daughter she told me she hit a classmate. I'm not going to bother getting into the details coz my concern is 'aggression e.g. Hitting a classmate' has been an issue for my daughter for five years. She is 10 years old now and in 4th grade. I'm very, very concerned that this has been happening for years and no matter how much I tell her it's bad and i'm sure she knows what to do, she can't control herself. I know she can't take other kids jokes/making fun of her and she always resolves to aggression. What donI need to do. I feel so frustrated.
Wonderful
Thanks for watching, PJ!
Are you going to have any workshops in the Boston area? I'd love to attend... if you do workshops that is lol
Nice one
thank you my mom aaid my tone of voice is always harsh with my almost two year old. im going to try this methods to see if it changes.
How has your relationship been with your child/ children since watching? I keep coming back to this video for help.
i can't believe i'm showing my bud these 4 perpetrators. i am unconsciously doing it. thank you for this, i hope i can change the way i am towards my bud.
Thank you. How is that my 3.5 yr. Old is perfect at daycare and anybody else when I AM ,as mother, not around? At home he is very whiney almost every 5 minutes, doesn't speak full sentences, wants me to pick him up ,can't play by himslef, calls me when ever he doesn't see me (walking to the kitchen or bathroom).... Very frustrating. Thanks for any advice
We live in an apartment complex with a playground, and my child was so excited to be outside, the other day, that he kept running from my sight and potentially endangering himself. I spanked him, but I feel like I could have acknowledged his excitement, held his hand, and told him that I could help him stay safe while his body felt like running in unsafe areas. I really hope I've gotten the gist of this video.
How has your relationship been with your child since watching this video, Beverly? I hope to hear well.
Thanks for the helpful tips. BTW you look like Kate Beckingsale 😀
Sharleen Alexander except cuter...
Thank you Lori for your encouragement.
I haven't been able to watch your video on how to help my 2 year old baby not to hit.
Apparently because of my geographical location. South America.
You have another way for me to see it. I think it would really help.
Blessings.
I love this i'm SO negative and i had no idea :(
I took away a telephone shower roughly from my 3 year old hands. The he didn't what me to dress him. This was after a difficult swimming class where he hit his teacher and a boy.
At the end I said... I know you like to cooperate to the harmony of the family. Please help me dress you. He accepted.
From the beginning I should have said.
I know you like playing in the shower. I know it's fun. Now is time to go and play outside with the plane and the horse at the main hall. This should have helped.
Let's try again to turn of the water and go play outside.
Please give me some inputs... Now I'm feeling guilty.
Love to you all.
Hi ,I am a toddler teacher I am by myself with six toddler’s 12 to 18 months I would like some advice how to get my toddlers to stop climbing on the table ,as soon as I go to change diapers One of the kids get up in the table and then most of the kids are on the table.
Last March, I stumbled upon this reading guideline *4ChildrenReading. Com* My son and I have already been really serious in performing reading lessons since then. I`m happy to report that he has been able to read several books on his own now. My boy feels very confident and is performing great in Kindergarten this year.?
Lori, you are the bomb! Do folks say that still?
ha! thank you and back atcha, Chris!
Christina Combie Not after 911...
My four year old was helping me choose an item to pass out at her class's Halloween party. She wanted the more expensive toys and I tried to explain to her that I couldn't afford them. She became frustrated and said, "Mommy, if you don't buy this for me, I am going to scream. I WANT THESE!"
I tried to stay calm but I was shaking. "I understand that you want that toy. You REALLY want it. I also see that you are feeling tired. You've had a long day at school, and you are probably exhausted. BUT, I need you to choose one of these smaller toys. Do you want this one, or that one?"
I probably spoke too much, but she didn't win and we got the job completed. I should have known better than to take her shopping after a long day at school.
Hi I was wondering if you could give me some advice. Lately mealtimes have been a struggle with my son. He is just over 2 1/2 years old and loves to play and explore a lot more than eat. My husband and I are unsure how to handle this without resorting to taking his toys away or turning off the TV or threatening to do so. We certainly don't want to punish him for being curious and liking to explore his world, but we also don't want him to go hungry. We have never had this sort of problem before he has always enjoyed his food and eating I assume it has something to do with his age. How can we get our son to stop playing and sit down and eat his food without resorting to tears and arguing?
Make mealtimes a fun experience. Show your appreciation of food. Put him on the counter as you make the food, and give him some of the veggies you're cutting. Name what you are eating. Teach him about spices and let him taste and smell the different kinds. It's great that you let him explore. Is there a possibility that he's not hungry?
And I understand your worry. All you can do is offer him food and he has the choice to eat it. If he doesn't, he will get hungry. He will learn to listen to his body and what he needs.
Thank you for the advice. I'm sure there are times where he's just not hungry, but he eats so little on the days where he's fighting against mealtime that it's hard to imagine that he's not hungry. We will have to try your tips. Thank you again.
hi Lori..this is great ..i have never thought of saying this..tqvm .. i cant wait to try talking to my kids now...But i have one problem ..my 7 yr old daughter seems to have problem waking up ..we can gp 1 hour waking her up with results ..i hit her every morning..pls help as she has become a very angry person and rude to all of us . pls help
1 year had passed by now since we utilized this *4ChildrenReading. Com* a reading manual. My little princess is constantly enhancing her own reading capabilities so far. She these days reads beginning chapter books and is also a great speller. She also makes up brief stories and also constructs sentences. ..
rosellA
I get that it's normal and healthy to want to negotiate and persist... its the "stay calm and neutral" part that is the problem. There's only so much anyone can take, and while it's vital to be modeling calm positive behavior for them... that's a lot of pressure on a worn out, frustrated, never-gets-a-break mom whose barely keeping it together as it is. THAT's the parenting tips I need. I already know that getting frustrated is my problem, its the "how the heck to find some calm when they've repeatedly pushed every single trigger you have and won't give you room to calm the F down" that I need help with.
Hi K&F Kenn - thanks for commenting. I know it's hard. We have to take care of our emotional health. There are no tips that "work" 100% of the time - and the goal is not to make your kids do what you want when you want. Obedience is a temporary solution usually created out of fear (which only limits children's real ability to be self-regulated) Here is the playlist for parent self-care. You might also try my Breaking the Anger Circle webinar. ua-cam.com/play/PL0G_h7C6IqI1DtWBYAZT0fA6xE1nyebEC.html
it was pretty helpful but I think I have a totally different situation. He is in kindergarden about to start preschool this year he has been having problems putting his hands on people including the teachers today he had an incident where he was throwing chairs at the teacher. whenever he comes home from school we ask him what did he do that day what did he have for lunch did he learn anything sometimes we ask him on the ride home sometimes we wait until later on in the day it seems like he don't want to open up completely or he's having problems trying to explain himself or most common answers are I don't know, because or he will just agree if we suggest an answer. he is not my biological son he is my girlfriend's son and it's just him and her at the house he's never around in the violent or unproper people I guess you can say if you have any suggestions on trying to get him to open up that would be grateful
we take the TV away we take his video games away he does get spanking once in a great while
@@Jayjay42023 have you seen improvement, Jay? I really hope to hear you have.
I have a 1 year old
WOW you look very beautifull kiss from colombia
Kiddo grabbed the pacifier out of siblings mouth when the little one was having a particularly hard time. I asked for pacifier back and the older one would not give it back. Instead of punishing I would say "you seem you be having a hard time leaving the pacifier with your sibling. I can tell you really want to hold the pacifier after I told you not to. Let me help"
Crying isn't the best way of getting what you want. It makes me not want to give you the fishing rod because that's reinforcing bad behavior. - >. "I see you really want the fishing rod, mommy is using it right now, you can use it next, look at how mommy uses it!"
I hate parenting! I read and watch all these videos and I am so overwhelmed. Having kids is the worst thing I ever did...I didn't plan them. I just like sex and now I am sitting here watching this video longing for my old life of Freedom away from the screaming and crying and parenting videos. I'm packing my bags and running away for sure!! Thank you for this video. It sent me over the edge. I'm outta here! Bahamas here I come!
Kbartist b lmaooo
You need ALMIGHTY GOD, and his counseling. ...
+Guitarzsteve Vai I tried that. It makes things feel better for awhile but it doesn't seem to last. And I mean I really really tried, like for 15 years...but it's like I was making it up because it was mostly positive...but idk...it doesn't work for everyone.
Kbartist b please sterilize yourself ASAP
seek help with how you are feeling. Parenting is hard! Don't be so rough on yourself, but at the same time know you do have a responsibility to be there for your children. There is nothing wrong with getting help for yourself, and your kids. Help as in not just youtibe videos... haha
i am so guilty i really dont know how to teach and talk to my boy he is five and some of kids bully him cause he play different he has hes own world and he is bot good in conversation just like me i am sad and guilty and how to teach him not to listen to what they said or mocking him cause he is upset to kids who does to him
How dare you call a child a "him or her" #2021
not sure what you're referring to but this video is from 2014.
@@teachthroughlove not sure if you got humor or if you dont
"obedience is an unreasonable expectation for any age ", what? ??? so.....when should we expect our children to obey their authorities? the Bible is very clear about how to train children to become obedient. Proverbs is a WEALTH of guidance. i have a hard time taking this sweet lady's advice when that statement is her theme. so, if obedience is not the GOAL,then...,what's the point of the rest of the training? my 21 month old knows right from wrong, and is obedient to our requests about 90% of the time....i KNOW that obedience is a completely reasonable behavior to expect....with consistent firm, loving, discipline, and lots of love and attention, affirming his value to me, as my child.
wow...still getting over her statement.
parents there is hope, when we parent the way God says to. He made our children anyways, surely He knows how to train them to be productive, smart, strong and loving adults one day.
Blind belief in authority is the greatest enemy of truth. Albert Einstein
TEACH through Love Hahahahaha, he was a socialist who thought that was better than market anarchy, so he's not even consistent with that quote. One shouldn't believe in the state (as it does not have sovereignty, morals/ethics apply on a universal human level), everyone believes in government, starting at the family level and extending to far greater complexity, such as in a church, general community, business hierarchy, etc, and that is an authority. Everyone also believes that they own themselves, and that is an ethical authority.
Ps: The irony is not lost on me that you are making a point against "blindly following authority with an appeal to...authority, by a person who blindly believed in authority saying not to blindly believe in authority. Belief in authority is in no way wrong per se, it is completely natural and necessary for human society, and neither is "blind" belief in authority wrong per se as what the irrational see as blind belief have no understanding of what others, rational or irrational, have as a basis for their belief in an authority, and all belief is axiomatic, but then are axioms blind beliefs, should we not all be complete nihilists and relativists?
TheThreatenedSwan wow your response reeks of hatred and negativity .. are you doing okay in life? Please relax and take deep breaths. Thanks
Anna Tubb б
Scotty Fraser this is disgusting...
Re-fram ( from today.) Instead of demanding my 4 yr old gets out of the car by saying.." I asked you to get out of the car, I'm hot let's go now " I could have said. "I know you enjoy going for rides in the car, we are home now let's go in and get cooled down in the ac." Or " I know you like being in the car, its hot in there I can help you out of the car." Something like that. :)