Stopping Stimming for Kids with Autism

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  • Опубліковано 1 гру 2020
  • Spencer Doman answers a common question for parents of kids with autism: "Why does my child with autism engage in stimming and what can I do about it?"
    Spencer points out the three factors that lead to stimming and how the Doman Method® helps address the root cause of these behaviors.
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 79

  • @mindoongie
    @mindoongie 2 роки тому +29

    You shouldn't stop stimming just because it makes your parent(s) uncomfortable that isn't healthy

    • @TheRealHusk
      @TheRealHusk 2 роки тому +10

      Annoying sounds are torture to me, I’m sure others feel the same.
      Nobody wants to hear repetitive noises all day every single day.

    • @mindoongie
      @mindoongie 2 роки тому +5

      @@TheRealHusk then go somewhere else. most people don't like stimming in front of other people anyway.

    • @mindoongie
      @mindoongie 2 роки тому +2

      @@TheRealHusk also, it's not constant. people do that when overstimulated.

    • @mycupofcocoa1125
      @mycupofcocoa1125 2 роки тому +2

      It bothers the siblings too.

    • @mindoongie
      @mindoongie 2 роки тому +2

      @@mycupofcocoa1125 it mostly happens when the person is overstimulated so instead of being annoyed, the sibling(s) should try to help the feeling go away if the person wants. or just mind their own business which isn't that difficult.

  • @DravenErica
    @DravenErica 2 роки тому +13

    We need to normalise stimming not the children. Not being allowed to stim is very stressful and people force others to stop it because it makes them feel uncomfortable but what about the stimmer?

    • @Harper-bw5mr
      @Harper-bw5mr 11 місяців тому

      yes i agree. as an autistic person im gonna say that i havent been able to stim like i use to because of personal reasons for a month or so and im starting to break down and i almost cant feel my legs anymore...

    • @DravenErica
      @DravenErica 11 місяців тому

      @@Harper-bw5mr as a fellow stimmer I understand how difficult that is. I'm lucky that I can mask some of my stims and since I work with children who have stims I can stim while working. I've found that my stims get worse the more I try to stim not to mention the level of stress it causes.

    • @steveneardley7541
      @steveneardley7541 4 місяці тому

      I agree. I don't stim to stimulate one of my senses, but rather to normalize the energy in my body. I get excesses of chi energy in various places and have to "work it out" by shaking my legs or pacing. If I don't do these stims, I start building up tension and anxiety that gets worse and worse. So maybe children can be taught effective stims that are more socially acceptable, but autistic kids need to stim. It's a form of self-regulation. What's the alternative? Valium?

    • @DravenErica
      @DravenErica 4 місяці тому

      @@steveneardley7541 this I fully understand. It helps us to keep control and off medication what is so awful about that.

  • @asexualamanita6193
    @asexualamanita6193 2 роки тому +8

    Don’t stop me from stimming. I’m not here to make you comfortable.

  • @KorokSeedss
    @KorokSeedss 2 роки тому +5

    you should never stop someone’s stimming. its a way of self regulation! if a stim is harmful, find a better alternative.

  • @Tom-ci4wn
    @Tom-ci4wn 2 роки тому +8

    I have autism I’ve loved stimming since I was about 2 people always say we aren’t taking the world around us when we stim which I think is completely false in fact sometimes I stim to understand the world round me better along with many other reasons and don’t tell me I’m not taking in the world around me, this isn’t true in fact I think stimming allows me to think about the world a bit more along with many other things. It’s a great past time I run around getting exercise and fresh air as I mostly do it outside whilst enjoying it. I use to bite stuff but I’ve stopped doing that and it’s mostly running/walking, hand movements and listening to music. I think if a child likes stimming let them as long as it’s not harmful to themselves or others. When people say it’s a bad thing I couldn’t disagree more.

    • @josephmartin1540
      @josephmartin1540 4 місяці тому

      Hear, Hear! He said some good things; but, I wonder if this organization might also be in favor of electric shocks...

  • @peteracton2246
    @peteracton2246 Рік тому +1

    My earliest memories are of stimming. I have done and will do it all my life. My autism can be demonstrated genetically. No amount of therapy will solve it. Tough for those who want everyone to be the same. Deal with it!

  • @IamI_1Conscience
    @IamI_1Conscience 2 роки тому +36

    Stimming is how we communicate! you shouldn't stop it unless it is harmful to ourselves or others.

    • @maximumphlegm
      @maximumphlegm 2 роки тому +1

      exactly!!!!

    • @JD-zh5nv
      @JD-zh5nv 2 роки тому +1

      Stimming is how you communicate? Can you explain that?

    • @norkathompson1346
      @norkathompson1346 2 роки тому +4

      @@JD-zh5nv is a way is use to express a feeling, deregulation, is just expression and is helps them to decompress. So yes they are expressing

    • @JD-zh5nv
      @JD-zh5nv 2 роки тому +1

      @@norkathompson1346 you neglected to actually explain anything.

    • @JD-zh5nv
      @JD-zh5nv 2 роки тому

      @@norkathompson1346 no explaination, so sad

  • @WaTahBasTard
    @WaTahBasTard 3 роки тому +8

    Fidget toys/tools/exercises. I have multiple activities and hobbies engage that not only fill the swimming needs but also stimulate my brain in ways that improve my brain functions and have blossomed my skillset.

    • @carriewilliams2113
      @carriewilliams2113 2 роки тому +1

      HOW does stimming allow you to understand the word better? When you are not interacting with people you are not IN the world...you are detached. Please explain HOW this helps you? When you sit or stand still and LOOK and LISTEN to the world around you, you can understand the world.....stimming is a waste of energy

    • @ThatWeirdLady2519
      @ThatWeirdLady2519 Рік тому

      Obviously you don't have autism. Thats ok, I'll help you understand. Stimming is a way for a ND person to calm the chaos in their minds. It helps them to self regulate and deal with overstimulation. It actually will help the person focus better, depending on the person, or keep them from losing control. There are many different reasons for stimming. If you'd really like to understand, there are plenty of videos you can watch that go into more detail. Just make sure you get an autistic point of view.😊

  • @nmajors27
    @nmajors27 2 роки тому

    Thank you so much! This was very helpful! I knew quite a bit of what you addressed already but you explained more on what seems like what would be way more effective ways to help with those things than what I’ve learned from professionals and just any and all research I’ve done so far for my child over the last 8 years. Hopefully I can apply these to helping my child feel more calm and relaxed and just better internally since they can not tell me how they feel. I’ve always been worried about that. It seems I need to tackle my child’s eating habits better as well and what I buy for them because though they might like what I buy right now more it’s probably making them feel terrible.

    • @STIclinic
      @STIclinic Рік тому +1

      Don’t make your kid stop stimming

  • @glimmerlarue7382
    @glimmerlarue7382 Рік тому +1

    Two common tics I do (squeezing and sniffling) are causing me physical pain but I just. Can’t. Stop! It’s beginning to give me shaking hands, headaches, bruises, muscle cramps, joint pain, you name it. Even if I’m in my house where I feel comfortable, or reduce stress, I find myself doing it constantly!
    Edit: I go to a therapist and she says the reason I squeeze myself it because it’s similar to a hug, and when I squeeze my hands it simulates clenching then releasing to relax yourself. We still don’t understand the sniffling, though.

  • @sh_muck
    @sh_muck 2 місяці тому

    I've been starting to stim a lot so much that its kind of putting strain on my vocal cords

  • @kellysworld5857
    @kellysworld5857 2 роки тому

    my son touches n taste and do alot of vocal stimming

  • @veganmexcubana1913
    @veganmexcubana1913 3 роки тому +3

    You look and speak like your grandfather 🙏🏽

  • @vroomcar5409
    @vroomcar5409 2 роки тому +17

    As an autistic person who has been stimming my whole life I don't find this very nice. Stimming is something which makes me happy and suppressing my stims causes me to get annoyed, irritated and makes it hard to focus. Only harmful stims should be something to stop (like how I often bite my nails to the point they bleed) and harmful stims should be turned into other types of stimming behaviour. Stimming isn't something bad and it's something that everyone does. Some nuerodivergent people stim more and I think neurotypicals should just tolerate it since we might have a meltdown if we don't get to stim.

    • @TheRealHusk
      @TheRealHusk 2 роки тому +5

      You make everyone else around you, upset.

    • @DravenErica
      @DravenErica 2 роки тому +8

      @@TheRealHusk why would it upset someone to watch a person stim, assuming it's not a harmful stim?

    • @captaincosback323
      @captaincosback323 2 роки тому +2

      ​@@TheRealHusk I don't remember when anyone asked you to speak.

    • @captaincosback323
      @captaincosback323 2 роки тому +1

      ​@@DravenErica people are just selfish.

    • @DravenErica
      @DravenErica 2 роки тому +2

      @@captaincosback323 sadly you're right. I have several stims that I do that no one can see for this reason. The rest of the World needs to get over itself. Stiming doesn't hurt anyone and helps me regulate so where's the problem?

  • @mystearicanohr9521
    @mystearicanohr9521 Рік тому

    Teacher here. Have a kid with serious stimming issues, swinging his arms while grunting and pacing. He will hit other children while doing this so it’s been a problem. He also goes nonverbal and gets into kids’ faces or touchy with them. There’s a complete lack of sense for personal space.
    I don’t know how to address this. I’ve explained personal space. I’ve pointed out to him that it’s not nice to scream nonsense in people’s faces. I’ve had him practice waiting respectfully while I’m talking with someone else, and even how to ask other kids to play. Also how to stand up for himself.

    • @Harper-bw5mr
      @Harper-bw5mr 11 місяців тому

      did you find a solution? i'd recommend talking to his parents about buying a fidget toy. if he has another way to stim that won't disturb anyone, he might find it easier to stop the other way.

  • @Animositous
    @Animositous 2 роки тому +3

    I like your message however there is a lot of mention of your organization. The title implies that this video will be Educational however comes off as an ad for your company.

    • @captaincosback323
      @captaincosback323 2 роки тому

      if you like his video then you might as well leave the Autistic community because we will not welcome anyone who will not accept our traits and differences.

  • @maximumphlegm
    @maximumphlegm 2 роки тому +8

    why is it upsetting for parents?

    • @Animositous
      @Animositous 2 роки тому +8

      It is upsetting because of the term that he used “trapped”. My son is 4 and has been diagnosed with severe autism. It crushes me when I’m trying to engage with him and he sees right through me. When these episodes occur, it appears that he is stuck and can’t get himself out of it. The one stim that kills me the most is when he is inhaling and exhaling very deeply and loudly. It looks like he’s hyperventilating and it is very scary. Brings me to tears.

    • @thefluffyaj4119
      @thefluffyaj4119 2 роки тому +3

      @@Animositous as an autistic person myself, please realize that your son does see you. just because he might not communicate with you doesn't mean he doesn't see you or listen to you.
      if he isn't verbally communicating with you, try a different method of communication. have you tried AAC devices? they offer different methods of communication that your son might like more
      I know it's hard to communicate with him, but try your best to listen to him. don't try to change him to be like everyone else, don't try to force him to be what he is not. that mentality is very damaging to both parent and especially child
      I reccomend listening to the autistic community. it's a community of people like your son, sharing their experiences, sharing their inner thought process, and trying to educate others. not every autistic person is the same, but you might be able to understand your son better. the most popular "treatments" of autism are often damaging to the autistic person, a good example being ABA. many autistic people have voiced the traumatizing and harmful effects of ABA. before you try treatments, maybe try to research what autistic people say about it. we are the ones living with the condition and who have first hand experience of these things

    • @captaincosback323
      @captaincosback323 2 роки тому

      ​@@Animositous Autistic people need stimming so stop suppressing it.

    • @galinatkachenko4715
      @galinatkachenko4715 Рік тому

      Are you kidding? When your child stimming and vocalisating on a fan for a full day should it make me so happy?

    • @STIclinic
      @STIclinic Рік тому +1

      @@galinatkachenko4715
      Yeah, probably means your kids happy

  • @learnhaitiancreole
    @learnhaitiancreole 2 роки тому +3

    This guy must be selling something. What a misleading video

  • @arclcs
    @arclcs Рік тому

    Yelling stemming gives me extreme migraines

  • @anomalou
    @anomalou Рік тому

    If I should stop stimming, you should stop speaking, it's an inconvenience for me and a lot of others :)

  • @yesterch
    @yesterch 3 роки тому +8

    My son has autism and did stimming. Doctors told me that he would never speak but after gut healing and juicing diet and we did andy cutler protocol to take out mercury and lead from his body for five years. This year we joined into the mainstream school, and he is doing fantastic. but over these years I observed that my son would do stimming only after certain foods, otherwise he is perfectly fine. he told me that he doesn't want to do stimming and that he is embarrassed about it, and he doesn't want any of his friends to see him doing stimming. I found out that when he is eating foods rich in oxalates or phytic acid he would do stimming. so cutting down on oxalates has drastically improved his well being. calcium and magnesium don't allow the body to absorb the oxalates. so uped his calcium and magnesium intake tiny bit.hope this helps somebody to find answers

    • @windy12368
      @windy12368 3 роки тому +1

      I am from india...plz let me know how did you heal the gut of ur child...and what is juicy diet..one more think what is Andy culter protocol..plz tell me🙏

    • @lipsan6041
      @lipsan6041 3 роки тому

      Please could you mention about the diet you followed for him

    • @jutublizard
      @jutublizard 2 роки тому +3

      Why do you even mention about these things if you don’t want to share more information with other people? That’s selfish ….

    • @spdst1nk6932
      @spdst1nk6932 2 роки тому +2

      proof or it didnt happen

    • @derpyliciousmiku
      @derpyliciousmiku 2 роки тому +1

      Autism cannot be cured. Your child simply socially matured at a later age as I did. Stimming is not to be ashamed of and is essential to an autistic persons wellbeing.