Sarah Millican's DIRTIEST Jokes From Outsider | Universal Comedy
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- Опубліковано 23 січ 2021
- Sarah talks randy ducks, hairy toes, going to the toilet while driving and periods in this compilation of the dirtiest jokes in her hit special Outsider.
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Twitter: / sarahmillican75
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Website: www.sarahmillican.co.uk
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#StandUp #Comedy #SarahMillican #Love - Комедії
One thing I love. No matter how much you watch Sarah Millican, how familiar you are with her work, she still can catch you out with her punchlines.
You know when a comedian is too hilarious when you've already watched/heard the jokes many times and still those crack you up 😁 😂 😂
And she's not one of those comedians lol
@@gerollopy different opinions
She’s the very best comedienne.
I would absolutely love Sarah to be my Enema-Nurse 😍
I LOVE Sarah Millican! She's just the funniest comedian. Every single joke is hilarious. I watch a video of hers pretty much every night before bed, so I go to sleep with a laugh in my heart.
"Uh, I'm clotting." Laughed so hard, I woke up my neighbor.
ugh, gross
@@alistairbalistair9596 try experiencing it!
It’s WI Week…´cause I’m making jam.
I'm clotting !! FFS - pissed me self laughing - she is so funny !! Love it
I call it "shark week". Cause I'm chumming the water😂
🤣😂🤣😂🖖❤️. I don't have to worry about that anymore, but shark week is brilliant! Lol
Yeah my daughter told me that little gem recently! I always called it the plague
Blood in the water 🤣
my mum and sister used to say "aunt flo is visiting"" hahaha
She is just brilliant!:)
The last joke was pure genius!
Probably one of the best.. I have a hard time laughing these days but Sarah gets the job done
I can't decide if you're funny crazy or, crazy funny?! Love it
LMAO such a lovely & funny lady 👍😊
I first saw her at a comedy club in bham in 2009.... She was unknown then but she was superb. A cut above everyone else that night.
You could just tell she was going to be huge.
I knew a woman who could pee in a bottle lying in a sleeping bag. She said you just need to understand your biology.
I’m going to be thinking about this all night. Hoooow do you do that?! It’s going to save my life camping. Omg.
@@jessadelix7415 if you can't figure it out, their are products like SheWee
@@jessadelix7415 you need to hold the bottle close to your urethra. I learned how to do it when I had to send a urine sample to the doctor.
@@theo-tabbyizcatstudios but… lying down? I would def end up peeing on the sleeping bag a little
@@theo-tabbyizcatstudios ok but get the bottle out of the sleeping bag too without spilling?
Love her. Hilarious!
When my Grandaughter was small I told her that having hairs on your toes was a sign that you wee'd in the bath. She looked at her toes, got all embarassed went and looked at her Mums feet and said "Grandad says you wee in the bath!" Try explaing that one.
.
Omg the duck joke at the end 😂😂😂
You’ve Not put me off my cream teas.
Duck wings, brilliant
😂😂
So hilarious! 😂
Twin jets ?
Sort ya flaps out girl 😂
Absolutely hilarious
"I'm clotting" I spit my drink out!!!
You spit but I gagged😣🥴🙄
I was stretched out like a flag.
Brilliant 😂🤣👍
The road maintenance crews just love hitting those discarded pee bottles with their lawnmowers.
Shes's brilliant :D
Sarah is such an amazing talent, the best I’ve seen since Victoria Wood (God rest her soul) ❤
Wank bank. Brilliant!
When working for a council many years ago, I cleared over 3 dozen 3ltr bottles of pee from the hedgerow and tree area of one layby, known to be a truckers layby.
Guess it would be too much common sense for the council to put a bin there...
Truckers Tizer.
do they put the cap on? why not just empty it in the ditch instead
Funi as
love her voice
Brilliant
It's called trucker tango or Stobart Strongbow..
Love Sally ....her delivery is spot on
Who the hell is Sally? I think you mean Sarah...
Clotting? Try "shedding my uterine lining", that'll get some looks.
For those of you in the US, Nurofen is a brand name in the UK for ibuprofen.
hilarious 😂😂
It does work!
Funny lmao
1:02 its lorry drivers :D
We used to say The painters are in for our periods.
Here in Australia we have a magazine called the 'Womens weekly'.
Which always confused us as kids because it was month by month.
This was back in the day when calling it what it was would of caused an uproar!
(Women's monthly for those playing at home)
I remember when it changed from weekly to monthly and everyone thought it was hilarious that they were faced with that dilemma about not changing the name.
😄 Nice joke but actually not true. It use to be weekly. But when they changed it to monthly, they decided not to change the name.
@@MrsSlocombesPuddyCat Well I was born in the 80's and while I do study modern history a little women's mags aren't on my priority list. A good fact to know though!
I love Sarah's comedy. She is hilarious. The only problem I have is being in the USA I am not familiar with British slang. Some of her jokes I just don't get. Need a book of British slang. 😂
Watch and listen to her more often you will understand her better!
Scottish slang.
1:25 is that Jimmy Carr s laugh I hear?
Oh she is hilarous😂 i love her dry wit
So funny
My Jam days are over!!
Could you explain that joke to me? I’m not sure what WI and Jam have to do with each other. I get the jam/period part, just not the WI.
@@BatyBug there's a stereotype that members of the women's institute spend their time making jam.
the only thing i'm thinking about is how to make a cork screw look like a duck
she is so funny love her jokes,
I don't recall seeing that as a National Institute Of Clincal Excellance approved treatment for migraine - imagine the queues at A&E on Saturday !
On the blob is the best name for a period
I can't see a wnk working, it seems to make it worse for me, apart from tablets the number one thing to do is drink plenty of water, that's the best cure for a hang over, the head ache is caused by dehydration, but you can easily be dehydrated without booze, constant dehydration cause cramps, I have diabetes and kidney problems which messes with how much you drink and urinate, I put up with devastatingly painful cramps for months not realising how dehydrated I was, I was urinating more than I was drinking, but yes drink water plenty of water it can cure a headache very quickly
Only if the cause of the headache is dehydration.
@@annakilifa331 its why you get a hang over, alcohol is diuretic, it causes you to urinate more often, when i was younger i was always amazed that you could drink larger then pee it out almost clear very quickly. i later realised that its not lager your peeing its the water that was already in your blood thats being got rid of. your kidneys are basically signaling to dump all the bodies water to attempt to remove so much toxins. you drink more alcohol and your body just dumps more water causing dehydration, seriously the best and fastest cure for a hang over is drink water as soon as you feel up to it, at least a pint. headache tablets deal with the pain not the cause of it, i drink vodka with pop added, it gets you drunk quick sober up quick, its the easiest for the body to handle and it has the lowest calorie count of all alcohol. i used to think it tasted of perfume, then i realised its nothing but alcohol im tasting. nothing else. zero hangovers i havent had one for 40 years
drink plenty before you go to bed, and during the night, even if it makes you pee in the night, its getting rid of the toxins and your body will then get back to normal
It’s true, it works.
I’m going to use ‘on the clot’ from now one.
it's true we had a mallard take up here and he evidently died in the act he was found floating with his willy fully out .at first I thought he had a parasite till i looked it up.
Did you use him as a corkscrew?
omg
pigs too
I saw an item many years ago specifically for women, I think was called "shepee" and was shaped like a stiletto shoe with no heel or toe end, designed for women on the go to pee standing up.
SheWee
I remember stumbling across the website for tha one day online... the 'she-wee'...
the funniest thing about that was it said "now you can pee while waiting in line at the post office"...
I found one at target years ago. I was able to use it once successfully. Every other time I must not have positioned it correctly and I leaked and pee was everywhere :(
@@BatyBug oh dear. that was unfortunate, sorry to hear that, I do not think it took off as a consumer item, a friend of mine was a post person for over 30 years, and lack of toilets on the round were a constant problem
I have a freshette. It took some practice to use it with your clothes on, but I love it. So easy to use. I recommed it. Never have a problem positioning. Just a shy bladder when I'm in a field in a skirt and people are looking.
I'm following her on Instagram!
What did she say ?
This is the only woman comedian I find funny, love her stuff
Anjelah Johnson, Liz Blanc, and Taylor Tomlinson. Check them out.
its bloody lorry drivers
Twin jets, she wee.
Some say the tomato boat as arrived
There's a true story about a Irish dj involving nurofen & a London to Ireland flight. Won't name him but its on the Internet but he was banned from a well known Irish airline
Neil Prendiville
Americans say "Period", us Brits say "Full Clot" 🍓 ...... sorry full stop!
3:07 Can someone tell me what she's saying? I hear "W.I.(?) week" but can't be sure. But through educated guesswork, I'm pretty sure the punchline is "making jam", if you want a boost of iron with your biscuit, LOL.
W I is the Women's Institute in the UK they're known for there cooking and baking cakes etc but also for making jars of jam
Truckers tizer its called
Driver Tizer
Superslag still alive then
Went to see her in Blackpool a few years back. Was really looking forward to it but just didn't find her that funny. Some people were laughing like drains though.
In the interval another couple asked us if we were getting it and when we said no the look of relief on their face as they thought the same thing.
We lasted about 5 more minutes into the second half but decided to leave. What a shame
Many facilities en route, in a 32 ton lorry ? Don’t think so luv.
I'm still waiting for the English version.
You need a shewee!
I’m an American... “WI week”?
Manny DelaCruz, W.I. stands for “Women’s Institute” which is an organisation that was formed in 1915 to educate women to be the best at what they do in all fields. Most of the time references to the W.I. usually has to do with cooking, baking etc. and in Sarah Millican’s reference, “jam making”.
@@rogerauclair1670 Thankyou! Now it’s funny!
@@rogerauclair1670 thank you!! :)
I love her sets, but with English as a second language it can get rough, I couldn’t even understand most of the words for that part.
@@rogerauclair1670 and opened every meeting with “Jerusalem”. Great series, a bit older , about the WI is called, “ Jam and Jerusalem”.
your funny but I'm boycotting twitter
Bottles of coke filled with pee. Probably police doing surveillance because getting out of the car could give the game away. Just don't tell them about the headache solution. Actually do, they might get arrested.
Why bother with the Nurofen?
What is a "wank" ?
If only there was a way to search Urban Dictionary for British slang. /s
&
Truckers tizer
Two streams... Sarah has protruding labia! There's an image lol. She needs a she wee
She finally got one. She talks about it in a later show. 😁
I’m haemorrhaging is worse
Only recently discovered Sarah's stand up after seeing her quite a bit on panel shows and thinking she was funny and adorable. She still is adorable but she's also disgusting and hilarious. Cnat get enough of her stand up
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
...down a bit and a tad to the left
Cause she's a Lady , fuckin funny though
I’ve never heard of a woman who can grow hair from her toes.
Is that for real or is she just funning with us?
It's not usually a topic for everyday conversation. And usually you gotta get really close to the toes to see the hair down there.. A bit awkward with strangers IMO 😜
I don't need the nurifan listening to sarah....
Is the voice part of the act?
It's called a local accent.
Geordie accent. I recommend youtubing jimmy Carr accents. Explains a lot 😁
Shite!
Saw her live @ The Glee Club in Brum 15 years ago. It was awful. Just embarrassing silences as she talked about women being raped. I can see by this that she hasn't got any better. ☹
THAT'S DISGUSTING YES!!
You should shower morning and evening!!
twice a day is really not necessary
That is actually bad for your skin
Why do women think crude is funny ?
Cow
You are tedious
She’s just not funny, I have never found her jokes funny.
@Lillith fair Calm down you, it was a recommended Chanel by you tube. And anyway, what’s my personal opinion got to do with you, you nosey Parker.
@@ononewheellad you posted your personal opinion publicly.. don't complain when people reply.
@@elsamsung1133 And you are. Who’s complaining. I was responding to a direct question, now get away and get over your self.
I’ve seen Sarah a number of times and she’s a very funny Lady
Nope, still don’t find her funny.
Just imagine a bloke telling so called jokes like this. The PC brigade would have a field day
Jimmy Carr, Frankie Boyle no imagination necessary.
Roy Chubby Brown
no they wouldn't
Standard fare for female comedians, women seem to appreciate it.
Ok snowflake
About as funny as a full lobotomy !
No - we don't get that.
She just relies on embarrassing smut because she has no funny material.
I beg to differ. She has quite a repertoire of jokes covering many different subjects in varying ways.
True, this video is smutty jokes, but, pretty sure the description should have for-warned that.
She’s quite witty, open, and above all, relatively real. If you no like, no watch, but give her the benefit, watch a full show, yes there’ll be some smut, but there’s other humour too
Smut is funny
She literally has segments where the crowd joins in, creating some of the truest stand up you can find as she has to, on the spot- go off script and match the audience members engaging with her.
Also, read the title before clicking on a video, ya bellend!
Why do i suspect that Eleanor is probably a Michael McIntyre fan?
@@raithrover1976 Ah! She is the one!
Disgusting....
Didn’t laugh once
@Ian Thompson I mean it wasn’t rlly that good. I listen to a lot ho so I’m brobably too harsh
Poor little person, nothing better to do than criticise, get a real life !
@@markwicks2428 sorry I thought l was allowed to express my opinion. Guess u are as arrogant as to think that bc my opinion opposes urs, u somehow have moral superiority? Yeh
Personal preference innit
We're all super impressed.
She is so,,,,
Not funny at all.