Against Therapist's Advice, Son Comes Out To Devout Muslim Father.

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  • Опубліковано 25 лис 2024

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  • @ravenst1709
    @ravenst1709 4 роки тому +423

    My mom had major health issues for years, we knew her end was coming and I always regretted my dad dying without my being honest with him so I decided I was going to tell my mother before I lost her, the day I went to tell her I kept freezing up and putting it off, she then asked me if what I wanted to tell her was that I'm gay, she then said she suspected since I was a kid but had it confirmed when I was 11 and she saw me kissing my buddy but decided she'd wait for me to tell her and now she wanted me to know that it never mattered I was and always will be her son, we then spent hours talking and laughing and crying with each other. Sadly I lost her to her health trouble a week later, I'll always be grateful to know she knew and still loved me

    • @deniselancaster6888
      @deniselancaster6888 4 роки тому +22

      If only she'd said something to you when you were 11yrs old, but decided to wait for you to tell her. Wow, such a beautiful caring mum who in her own struggle with illness, came to your rescue and helped you say the words you couldn't yourself. Thank you for sharing your beautiful story.

    • @Raay.90
      @Raay.90 4 роки тому +17

      This is such a touching story I’m glad your mom was accepting & I’m so sorry for your loss

    • @ravenst1709
      @ravenst1709 4 роки тому +7

      @@Raay.90 thank you I didn't tell it to take away from this person story i just wanted to share with everyone

    • @Raay.90
      @Raay.90 4 роки тому +4

      raven st its okay, there is a space for all of our stories to be heard

    • @starrynight1165
      @starrynight1165 4 роки тому +5

      My condolences. Im glad you were able to tell her.

  • @nycfan2003
    @nycfan2003 9 років тому +603

    I am so impressed by how even-tempered and even loving you are. It couldn't have been easy, but you are a special man.

    • @jonesnj07
      @jonesnj07 8 років тому +8

      +nycfan2003 it's called numb.

    • @cliffordgeier149
      @cliffordgeier149 4 роки тому

      @@jonesnj07 8l8

    • @ahhh4117
      @ahhh4117 3 роки тому

      Coming from a similar experience, it takes a lot of hard and difficult personal work to get to this point, from initially realizing your parent's love will be challenged

  • @raychill3934
    @raychill3934 4 роки тому +132

    when i came out to my dad he said “darling, i don’t care what parts you like, just as long as the person those parts are attached to treats ya well.” love that old man..

  • @rodgerrabbit7724
    @rodgerrabbit7724 9 років тому +1639

    i dont understand how hard it is to love your child. if you can't love them when they come out as gay then you never truly loved them.

    • @dinard38
      @dinard38 9 років тому +59

      Rodger Rabbit I totally agree. That's the way I feel.

    • @xOrion89x
      @xOrion89x 9 років тому +21

      +Rodger Rabbit Is that what you got from this? lol

    • @kingsufian07
      @kingsufian07 9 років тому +34

      +Rodger Rabbit i think its hard because the faith is ringing at the back of our mind be it christian muslim etc. If me - just fucking love your my own child. To have no support and love from a family is heartbreaking. Interesting vid though.

    • @ferdynand2402
      @ferdynand2402 8 років тому +3

      i agree

    • @Woodlouse5
      @Woodlouse5 8 років тому +75

      +Rodger Rabbit Unfortunately, Islam is a religion that's main tenant is complete and devout submission to God, and to put the religion and relationship with God before even your children. Unfortunately that's the way it is. That, and bullying tactics of hell, eternal damnation, etc.
      His dad was more fearful of his son being damned to hell, he still loves his kid. He wanted to save his kid. That's all.
      Imagine you're a muslim (devout) and then you basically find out that your son is on a route to hellfire. Wouldn't you want to do something about it?
      That's the way I see it.

  • @jillowens7689
    @jillowens7689 7 років тому +626

    When my son first came out. I automatically accepted him. And I assured him he is perfect in my eyes. About a year later I over heard my son telling his friends who were having problems with their parents that it was no big deal to me. And that wasn't true. So i told him... No my love, it broke my heart. I cried myself to sleep for weeks.... Until I realized, I was crying for the things I wanted for my son. I had to let go of my dreams for my sons and accept his... It unfair to think parents should just simply understand. They need understanding too. However parents need to realise. It's their life, don't lose your baby to something so simple. Love is love, don't make them choose. Its wrong and you will regret hurting you child so deeply. My Jackie Boy is my butterfly...! And his soon to be husband is amazing. Who wants to be theStereo typical family anyway? Parents remember this one thing. If you don't have your child's back.... Then your the one with the problem..... Not your gay child....

    • @emmanueldidier321
      @emmanueldidier321 7 років тому +39

      Jill Owens Beautiful, and so true. The greatest accomplishment of a parent is to let his/her child go, to live his or her own life. Sometimes VERY tough, I know.

    • @VampguyN85
      @VampguyN85 6 років тому +12

      Very well said

    • @slivertoe
      @slivertoe 6 років тому +44

      Thank you for sharing so honestly, Jill. I came out to my mom when I was in high school, and I harbored a lot of resentment toward her for not understanding immediately. From my perspective, my problem was bigger than hers so I was angry at her for putting her feelings before mine. That was a long time ago and she's my biggest champion now. But with the passing of time, I've realized that parents do have dreams and goals for their children that are just as real to them as the child's dreams and goals for themselves, and the grief that some parents experience as a result of their children being gay is a very real thing. My parents are supportive now, but I no longer blame them for the times when they weren't. They were doing the very best they could at the time just like I was. We're all in this together, right?

    • @PawanKumar-bn7yt
      @PawanKumar-bn7yt 6 років тому +6

      true...well said

    • @raliixaviero4674
      @raliixaviero4674 5 років тому +6

      This is so true😢

  • @morganolfursson2560
    @morganolfursson2560 7 років тому +109

    Religion is such a plague . All this because of a fucking book .
    Glad i was raised by atheist parents and atheist grand parents and atheist great grand parents . My coming out happened one morning when i was about 14 , (i'm 43) and lasted about 6 seconds . I told my father first because we are extremely close , he said , well , you hid it well , good thing you told me while you're still young , because the best years of your life are about to start , be safe and then he called my mother and said "did you know that Kyllian is gay ?, my mother said no , and then told me , keep on bringing good grades , be sure we are behind you and , and instead of saying be safe , she told me to meet her after school to meet a very good friend of hers who became my first gay friend , who was much older than me , and answered every question i had and is still one of my dearest friend today .
    Never a single time was the words god , hell, or whatever bullshit ever mentioned .

    • @tuck295q
      @tuck295q 6 років тому +9

      Lucky ass I am fucking jealous.

    • @SB-iy9vn
      @SB-iy9vn 20 днів тому

      @morganolfursson2560 lgbt is a plague as well
      FYI there are atheist who believe the gay is bad

  • @RCSVirginia
    @RCSVirginia 9 років тому +152

    The psychiatrist gave good advice for the time: It was smart to wait until after your education was finished, and you were independent, to come out to your father. Most likely, it removed the temptation for him to try to use finances as a leverage over you. This probably went as well as it could. This video is being added to my "Coming Out As Gay" UA-cam Playlist.

    • @joeybeaupre7861
      @joeybeaupre7861 3 роки тому +3

      Send me the link

    • @RCSVirginia
      @RCSVirginia 3 роки тому +3

      @@joeybeaupre7861
      I appreciate your asking. Here it is. I have tried to put a variety of "Coming Out" videos on it. I honestly feel that young gays or kith-n-kin of young gays are more interested in the experiences of those who have come out as gay in a video than in what I would have to say.
      ua-cam.com/play/PLF803F72BD0CF8C98.html

  • @breew7126
    @breew7126 7 років тому +143

    Very nice story- and to those saying very negitive things about this man's father....there is no need. He loves his father, and would probably extremely offended to hear people speak about him in such a way. You can see how much he loves his father and that their bond is rather close despite his father's difficulty to come around the bend completely. Often love can be more important than understand. Love can be more important than being right. He could refuse to see his father and be angry because of his reaction, but that wouldn't help anyone get anywhere. Instead he takes the high ground. Commendable.

    • @AisteOsinskyte
      @AisteOsinskyte 7 років тому +17

      I actually love these stories, because they show what it means to be a great parent. It is easy to accept gay children, when you think being gay is ok. But this man struggled very hard to be a good parent despite his belief. That's why it is wonderful.

    • @duane2500
      @duane2500 7 років тому +10

      I agree with you, he shows nothing but respect for his dad and his dad, though a bit of a drama queen himself, seems to show nothing but respect to his son. A lovely relationship even if they avoid the discussion.

    • @alienphreaker7714
      @alienphreaker7714 5 років тому +2

      Love embodies understanding.

    • @riannamajzoub5241
      @riannamajzoub5241 4 роки тому +4

      I am kinda glad it ended happy. Those saying crap about the dad probably have baggage of their own. I made sure to admit my own for one negative commenter. Another which I stated the therapist should have stayed impartial in this matter due to the fact you never can judge another person’s reaction before an encounter.

    • @alexcode5722
      @alexcode5722 4 роки тому +2

      Bree W agree with everything u said.

  • @steviejongh4511
    @steviejongh4511 8 років тому +154

    This is a great coming out story that can mean a lot to many gay muslims. Unbelievable how you got thru all this. There is really hope.

    • @MrGreen-fi6ux
      @MrGreen-fi6ux 7 років тому

      stevie jongh
      repent you sinners.

    • @shannongoatright7025
      @shannongoatright7025 7 років тому +23

      Oh shutup, Mr. Green. Clearly, you're the one casting the first stone, you hypocrite. Move along.

    • @PhilVerryChannel
      @PhilVerryChannel 6 років тому

      +Mr. Green - Christ calls us to love all others into wholeness, especially those against us, non-believers and believers alike. Just give that a bit of thought would you please?

    • @EddVCR
      @EddVCR 3 роки тому

      That’s so true.

    • @SB-iy9vn
      @SB-iy9vn 2 роки тому +2

      gay muslims?
      no such thing

  • @okimlistening2u
    @okimlistening2u 9 років тому +81

    Khalid, you mention here that your dad is incredibly proud of you as a writer; well, as a counselor, I am incredibly proud of you as a young man! You are living proof that out of adversity comes the call to greatness. Because of your strength of character and intellect, I know that this terribly difficult story of your 'coming out' will make you stronger and more certain of your greatness. I am so proud of you and so happy for you. Thank you and all the best to you..............Ray

    • @idkuwuiguess23
      @idkuwuiguess23 5 років тому +4

      mark anderson the behaviors that increase suicide rates are those of people like you, not those of the lgbt community, get over yourself you ignorant bigot.

    • @piranha4508
      @piranha4508 4 роки тому +5

      mark anderson you do realize the only reason suicide/anxiety/depression rates are higher because of relentless bullying and harassment and fear from homophobes that think they’re not normal? being gay doesn’t make you depressed, prejudice does.

  • @yootoob4516
    @yootoob4516 9 років тому +136

    Khalid's story reveals very interesting thins:
    He chose to be truthful with his father even though there could be dire financial consequences. That is far from selfish.
    His father completed his sentence, meaning that like his mother, dad had known for a long time and hoped his denial would prevail over reality.
    That this affected Khalid's ability to maintain relationships indicates this is an issue of IDENTITY and not sexual activity.
    Last, Khalid has awesome eyebrows and a sexy nose. I suspect Khalid will have a happy life, because he knows how to make correct choices, regardless of the difficulty.

    • @texasdude1
      @texasdude1 4 роки тому +1

      No it’s more of a revenge against his dad

    • @riannamajzoub5241
      @riannamajzoub5241 4 роки тому +1

      Lebanese entitled father doesn’t try this crap with me lately. I guess our President’s threats were terrifying enough when I stated “if mom isn’t here to pamper you after one of your meltdowns I’ll make sure your shipped back to Beirut in a metal shipping container for your years of “Beastly conduct”. “

    •  4 роки тому

      @@riannamajzoub5241 nice! I like it when kids use the Reverse Uno Card on selfish problematic parents. I despise Trump, though.

    • @riannamajzoub5241
      @riannamajzoub5241 4 роки тому

      @ Trump is only being used as a pawn here. I dislike a lot of the stuff going on with him but I do support his move on TikTok due to a lot of ableist content and child predators.

  • @akindelebankole8080
    @akindelebankole8080 8 років тому +28

    Beautiful compassion from this son to his father.

  • @valsainking
    @valsainking 2 роки тому +4

    Extremely powerful, honest and moving account. This extremely intelligent young man managed to put into words the very notion that rang through my head as he was speaking: that children of loving parents learn to reciprocate that same love and extend a genuine olive branch of understanding, patience and forgiveness towards said parents. As he said, he never viewed his being gay as being such a bad thing, but he understood that it would still be a traumatic experience for his devout father. As a result of this loving son's understanding and patient nature, he was able to allow his father the opportunity to grieve for the son he thought he had and be reborn in acceptance, respect, pride and joy for 'the boy, the man, the poet, the scholar' he was actually blessed to call his son.
    I can barely write this without crying. Children can be so forgiving towards their parents' shortcomings, that they are able to be the rock a parent may need to lean on until that parent has experienced the epiphany of love that allows them to come out at the other end as a brand new blessed and grateful individual. For a devout Muslim father, his son's revelation had to have felt like a confirmation of the young man's fate to be condemned to a kind purgatory on earth, which is precisely the malignant fear his own religion had sadly conditioned him to feel. Yet, the son, full of understand and grace towards his father, was able to allow the old man to grieve and be there for him at the other end with a comforting and reassuring smile. Again, what a heartfelt account of a father and son bonding at a level neither probably imagined possible.
    Advice to devout parents: your children's sexuality is something they have no control over and it is something ultimately rendered trivial by the infinitely greater and infinitely complex spectrum of their own humanity.

  • @TheKirbyT
    @TheKirbyT 6 років тому +9

    My grandfather (who basically raised me) reacted very similarly to Khalid's dad when I came out. We're closer than ever about 6 years after the fact, and I can tell that the poor reaction is from a place of being scared for the soul of someone you love so much.

  • @grrrohmy665
    @grrrohmy665 4 роки тому +14

    the therapist’s advice was excellent but i’m glad that this story has a positive ending and that he is happy now 💗

  • @yummboy2
    @yummboy2 3 роки тому +4

    At least his father did not allow his deeply wounded emotions to turn violent and I must assume his love for his son was his strength. I am very happy for them both that they have a strong relationship despite their differences, as I know there is still room for growth.

  • @shieldsup2076
    @shieldsup2076 9 років тому +283

    When I came out to my dad, he kind of stammered a bit, and then I said "get over yourself Dad" - it worked.

    • @dariusanderton3760
      @dariusanderton3760 8 років тому +15

      +ShieldsUp wow, you told him you were gay and then you insulted him. Jackass.

    • @nicolovespanda
      @nicolovespanda 6 років тому +45

      Darius Anderton how does that make them a jackass

    • @2degucitas
      @2degucitas 5 років тому +49

      @@dariusanderton3760
      Wrong. Not an insult. It was strong advice. And his dad was smart enough to know he was right.

    • @ConservativeAnthem
      @ConservativeAnthem 5 років тому

      @@2degucitas String advice?

    • @ConservativeAnthem
      @ConservativeAnthem 5 років тому

      @Flora Fauna Huh?

  • @monswye
    @monswye 5 років тому +13

    "I think the burden that he carries with him is just as heavy, if not heavier, than the one that I've always carried with me." Such an astute insight!

  • @irwincrook567
    @irwincrook567 4 роки тому +2

    In all his story I was not able to stop thinking how much his fathered has been through and still holds on with life withh all confidence.
    Loads and loads of respect for the father, from the bottom of my heart.
    Salute!!

  • @PawanKumar-bn7yt
    @PawanKumar-bn7yt 6 років тому +35

    he is beautiful...and his eyes are mesmerizing 💙😍

    • @frankpaya690
      @frankpaya690 4 роки тому +1

      And his skin looks delicious, like vanilla ice cream with nuts.

  • @jaylafunk5764
    @jaylafunk5764 7 років тому +23

    He’s so handsome and a Sweetheart. Woww! Congrats For having that bravery!😘🏳️‍🌈

  • @Austin8thGenTexan
    @Austin8thGenTexan 4 роки тому +5

    A bittersweet story but mostly sweet - as time passes. My Texas dad was quiet when I told him, but eventually began asking a few questions, but making more observations about how I had lived my life. No hugs or tears, but I was thankful for his mild reaction - compared with other friends stories. Texan men of his generation generally didn't talk about deep or emotional things. He has since passed away and I hope now he understands fully. I was glad to have the opportunity to take care of him the last six months of his life, and be with him when he died. I love my Daddy ❤️

  • @onlyget1
    @onlyget1 7 років тому +26

    The fact that his Dad took it to those extremes is amazing to me but at least he wasn't violent because I have heard some horrible stories

  • @MrMacmiller99
    @MrMacmiller99 9 років тому +76

    We pray 5 times a day* When people are very devout and committed to their faith they will be more accepting. My entire Muslim family in Saudi Arabia accepted me as a gay, after my father interred into my room while I was having an affection with my gay partner and I'm glad he did:)
    Side note: The gov't of Saudi and the people of Saudi have quite different views!

    • @CowTaurog
      @CowTaurog 9 років тому +2

      F- tech Same deal in Texas. Almost makes me want to leave to a different country sometimes, but not gonna happen, I'm staying right here at home.

    • @MrMacmiller99
      @MrMacmiller99 9 років тому +4

      CowTaurog It will get better not long from now, lets not lose hope.

    • @victorbarraza4910
      @victorbarraza4910 9 років тому +6

      CowTaurog just go to a differnt state, or austin, they say austin is pretty gay now a days. I don't know, I'm from Chile and people here is still very stupid, but we are getting better finally.

    • @suskechidori
      @suskechidori 7 років тому +6

      強い 立派 素敵 you can't be gay and Muslim read about the story of prophet luth a.s

    • @jacob.g.l1592
      @jacob.g.l1592 6 років тому +8

      CowTaurog Dude you won't get 100 lashings for being gay in Texas.

  • @scottrindal7859
    @scottrindal7859 9 років тому +8

    That was very moving. And from the description of the father and his reaction I think it is amazing that they have such a good relationship 4 years later.

  • @mray8519
    @mray8519 2 роки тому +8

    His father, steeped in rigid Muslim doctrine, ignorant of basic human psychology and history and physiology was a therapist. Apparently anybody can be a therapist. I’m glad you made it thru a most difficult experience.

    • @PungiFungi
      @PungiFungi 5 місяців тому +1

      I can imagine why his marriage ended in divorce.

    • @chaalbaaz429
      @chaalbaaz429 2 місяці тому

      Lol ik you know nothing about how psychology works. Or academia in general

    • @mray8519
      @mray8519 2 місяці тому

      @@chaalbaaz429 the fuck you say. 😅😂🤣

  • @simonbrooke3440
    @simonbrooke3440 8 років тому +10

    You're a very brave, kind and insightful man. Thanks very much for sharing this video. Wishing you every happiness.

  • @drmc3617
    @drmc3617 5 років тому +8

    Thank you. Khalid, a Muslim person is very difficult to reach. You are awesome. I’m married to an Indonesian and he is freaked about ever living in his country because of the way they treat gay people. He plans to create an LGBT support site for Indonesian people. I hope he is as brave as you are.

  • @starrynight1165
    @starrynight1165 4 роки тому +3

    I hope you eventually work through everything together when youre ready. That must have taken so much courage to come out to him and i wish you the best of luck.

  • @doorleofferhaus3900
    @doorleofferhaus3900 4 роки тому +1

    The love shown here for the father, the empathy for his hardships and life journey is really touching.

  • @patrickh4340
    @patrickh4340 9 років тому +44

    love your story! as a gay and muslim man with muslim parents

    • @hrh2842
      @hrh2842 5 років тому

      And everything becomes so much better when one keeps in mind it's all superstition.

    • @Mitchery
      @Mitchery 4 роки тому +1

      @ftwbk He probably wanna remain Anonymous.

    • @DP-tf7qb
      @DP-tf7qb 4 роки тому

      @ftwbk I know a gay Muslim Patrick, no joke, this might be him

  • @AfraidMonsters
    @AfraidMonsters 4 місяці тому +2

    He’s very cute. Hope he’s doing well today, 9 years since this video posted.

  • @blank-nono
    @blank-nono 6 років тому +3

    So beautiful! What a wonderful person and story. Truly moving.

  • @GrotrianSeiler
    @GrotrianSeiler 5 років тому +1

    These videos have so much value. Without the support of friends and family life is just harder. You know this kid is gonna be just fine. I sympathize with those who can't find it in themselves to see the other side, but many can't, so we all lose. Life shouldn't be a struggle.

  • @00Licorne00
    @00Licorne00 9 років тому +174

    It's so sad to see that even people who are in professions like his dad , being a doctor , professor etc. that are usually considered being mastered only by intelligent people can be still , at the same time , so narrow-minded and uneducated in other areas ...

    • @XaverScharwenka
      @XaverScharwenka 9 років тому +8

      +00Licorne00 We have PhDs in various Sciences who would still deny evolution and instead go with their creationism and how the world is flat. To get a PhD requires brain, not faith.

    • @abcdde3274
      @abcdde3274 9 років тому +2

      +XaverScharwenka Many will still believe in creationism and deny evolution (macro-evolution, precisely), but there is no fucking way that any of those PhDs believe that world is flat and that our solar system revolves around the earth. Don't be silly, I mean, there are really few of them who still does, but in this modern world, almost everything like satellite work on the basis that earth isn't flat.

    • @delamordant
      @delamordant 6 років тому +3

      It's exactly because he's educated - in a religious sense - that he's problems with his son being gay. It's because he's intelligent that he nevertheless accepts it, without really approving. He has a different conviction than I and you have with respect to this aspect. Who are you to declare your conviction to be the right one. There are good arguments - also non-religious ones - to limit as well as to promote homosexual behaviour on a societal level. Which of both overweigh depends on many factors. Those factors are not invariant over time. Religion is very conservative and so its points of view are determined by conditions far away back in time., That can be problematic but still in the long run sometimes the only right view. Because predicting the future is very hard some people rely on religion. It can give a better outcome in the long run. Only future can tell.

    • @rothvinbosley1335
      @rothvinbosley1335 6 років тому +10

      When it comes to religion people do not think scientifically or rationally, My faith believes all men are equal and of equal worth but gay people are not permitted to marry or live together unmarried. As a result, I left the faith after 50 years of thinking about it. If the prophet was so wrong about the nature of sexuality, what other things could he have been wrong about?

    • @delamordant
      @delamordant 6 років тому

      Who says this 'prophet' was so wrong and not you ? (Mind you, i'm not saying that 'he' was right and you are wrong. Just wandering about your argument.)

  • @caralane7534
    @caralane7534 8 років тому +1

    You made me cry! How brave you are! You are doing more than you know.

  • @SecretiaTV
    @SecretiaTV 4 роки тому +10

    Had the same experience with my christian fundamentalist parents that this guy had with his Muslim father. Anyone who's a fundamentalist in any religion has serious problems

  • @robertm.8608
    @robertm.8608 4 роки тому +2

    Khalid, you are a man with great dignity, compassion and understanding.
    Beautiful story.
    You understood you're Dads feeling and didn't press the issue, wise choice.
    I am the only male of 5 siblings from a very traditional Italion family.
    I never.... "came out"....per say....with words, I just let everyone figure it out for them selves,
    From 17 years old I lived with the same man for 48 years....till his death.
    My dad knew my situation but without words or talking about me being gay he treated me and my partner always with love and respect.
    Bravo to both You and you're Dad for respcting those boundries.
    Sometimes less said is more powerfull.
    Best to you and youre future.

  • @Jose_Hunters_EWF_Remixes
    @Jose_Hunters_EWF_Remixes 6 років тому +32

    All that was missing from dad's reaction was, "I'm coming to join you, Elizabeth".

    • @frankpaya690
      @frankpaya690 4 роки тому +1

      You're dating yourself, just think how politically IN-correct that show- Sanford and son, is by today's politically "correct" standards. people get triggered, and get their pink panties in a bunch nowadays, behind what they have been told to be pissed off about, not about anything they've made up their own minds about .

    • @anthonycoleman9593
      @anthonycoleman9593 4 роки тому +1

      😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄LMAO

    • @Cocochantelle
      @Cocochantelle 4 роки тому +1

      Murtaza Bijani never would have thought that Arab families would watch something like Sanford & Son, a black show. That’s pretty cool!

    • @EddVCR
      @EddVCR 3 роки тому

      OMG 😂 Yes!

    • @70sfred1
      @70sfred1 3 роки тому +1

      I'm old enough to get the Sanford and Son reference!

  • @musicismylife5231
    @musicismylife5231 5 років тому +2

    You are so strong and this story is going to help so many people come out to there family. God bless. 💜

  • @jd3422
    @jd3422 8 років тому +3

    Excellent. Love the way he stood up for himself.

  • @darondatoole7439
    @darondatoole7439 4 роки тому +1

    Amazing! Beyond incredible. Massive hugs to your father, you and your mother. People whom I look up to.

  • @robotaholic
    @robotaholic 4 роки тому +4

    When I told my parents it was through my apartment door and I was crying because my dad fired me, took back his car and I was disfellowshipped...shunned so to speak by my parents. I got out into the world got a job, car, nice place etc...and now my mom is really old and is coming to live with me this month. No matter what she thinks of me or my sexual preference, I'll always take care of her. Maybe some day before she dies she'll accept me for who I am.

    • @gingerzarecool
      @gingerzarecool 4 роки тому

      I'm sorry that happened to you! You're an amazing person for caring for your mother.

  • @paulmiller6647
    @paulmiller6647 2 роки тому +1

    Powerful video.

  • @rainingstorm4526
    @rainingstorm4526 4 роки тому +15

    i am muslim and gay i cry everyday ,,because no one can help and i cant believe god can can punich me of something i have no control in

    • @sakinazehra7533
      @sakinazehra7533 4 роки тому +2

      Stay strong brother.There must be a way

    • @rainingstorm4526
      @rainingstorm4526 4 роки тому +2

      @honey b ok so how should i live the rest of my life ??? not doing that thing that all ppl marry for ?? i shoud not love?? i should not have sex ?? its esay to say that when u are not in my situation

    • @rainingstorm4526
      @rainingstorm4526 4 роки тому +5

      @honey b thank u for thosr kind words , i agree

    •  4 роки тому +3

      God doesn't exist. Its a made up story centuries old to keep people under control and submit them to wholly unnecessary hardship.

    • @karmaf2p431
      @karmaf2p431 2 місяці тому

      I was in your situation 2 years ago, what i did was studying more and more about Islam, concept of god and homosexually, are you sure that your beliefs are correct? ​@@rainingstorm4526

  • @AlabasterClay
    @AlabasterClay 4 роки тому +1

    Wow, how compassionate and caring of your father's difficulty and struggle. I'm so glad you still love each other through the difference.

  • @Magnetron33
    @Magnetron33 5 років тому +3

    What a beautiful young man with a beautiful story.

  • @davidwm
    @davidwm 8 років тому +1

    Thank you, Khalid, for sharing your very powerful experience. We, as a society, forget that cultural differences can make coming out extremely difficult and in cases impossible. It's wonderful to know that your relationship with your father is evolving into a stage of acceptance.

  • @kishmish64
    @kishmish64 6 років тому +25

    From a traditional Pakistani family in uk
    Came out to my sister , my parents n brothers .... no problems there . I’m even God father to my sisters children and now her daughter is married ( she is 1/2 Iranian ) to a guy from Pakistan ... I was made god grandad to their son :0)))
    I even have family in Pakistan who totally except me for who I am !

  • @khalidhaniff2106
    @khalidhaniff2106 2 роки тому +2

    I came out 2 years ago! Wish I did it sooner too. Thanks for your share. -Khalid😀

  • @laustraliana
    @laustraliana 6 років тому +5

    Your dad must have done something right because you are a beautiful, kind and empathetic young man

  • @hiimain7932
    @hiimain7932 4 роки тому +1

    This made me cry.. 🤧🤧🤧
    Glad his dad is supportive and love him.

  • @KikiTAdam
    @KikiTAdam 5 років тому +5

    I can say we have the same name, and the almost same life experiences with smaller twist, I'm happy that you found peace and acceptance.

    • @theguntersadopt3268
      @theguntersadopt3268 5 років тому +2

      Sorry that things arent going the way you wish. I hope the best for you

    • @KikiTAdam
      @KikiTAdam 5 років тому +1

      Thank you for you kindness and consideration

  • @kathe.o.
    @kathe.o. Рік тому +1

    Khalid is the product of a broad-minded Christian mother & a traditional Moslem dad. What Khalid must understand is in a the Moslem world being gay is an exacutional offense. In other words as a Palestinian his dad struggles with the traditions of homophobia.
    JUST remember GOD loves you regardless. Best of luck with your continued relationship with both parents.

  • @___Angelica
    @___Angelica 7 років тому +3

    breaks my heart. love to you both.

  • @2020abcd
    @2020abcd 4 роки тому +1

    Such a lovely story. Thanks for sharing!

  • @TMNg0438
    @TMNg0438 5 років тому +3

    I really appreciate how he views his dad. Coming out to religious parents who truly fear for your soul, who believes you are going to hell not necessarily because you are evil, but because they believe your sexuality will separate you from God/heaven, it's tough. My parents love me and while they don't love that im gay, they support me through it. However, in my early adolescents and into college, they definitely prayed that I would continue to "give my sexuality to God" and remain pure. I know now they still pray that I'll return to God. It's not because they don't love me, but because their faith is so that they want me to be with them in heaven. I get it. I don't agree with their beliefs but I do understand, especially since I was a christian for many years until I chose my own path. It's not easy feeling that pull of your faith vs your sexuality/identity (not including religious people that are for lgbtq). It's like tug of war and for such a long time, I was afraid of either side winning. Now I embrace my sexuality and I hold a lot of understanding towards those who struggle with acceptance

  • @jimbond8927
    @jimbond8927 4 роки тому +1

    This is beautifully and lovingly expressed. Thank you.

  • @TheCesarLorenzo
    @TheCesarLorenzo 5 років тому +7

    Rolling around on the floor? What?😂

    • @moimeme6533
      @moimeme6533 4 роки тому

      yeh that part was a little much...next he was chewin the scenery...

  • @marionhamburg
    @marionhamburg 8 років тому +1

    Even though I don't know you , I really do admire you for sharing your story . and glad to hear that you and your dad have a close relationship after all the hurt you both must have gone through ...A father son relationship is so important ,but unfortunately this doesn't happen in every family so you are very lucky to have him in your life now.

  • @laurafedora5385
    @laurafedora5385 4 роки тому +4

    I’m glad his dad came around, even if his initial reaction wasn’t good.

  • @kanenbreen677
    @kanenbreen677 4 роки тому

    You are beautiful. To some of us falls the task of “accepting” that our parents will never really accept our truth. Peace and love can still be found here and your story confirms that complex reality. Be happy and safe and I’m sure for your father, that will prove to be enough x

  • @chrisquiett1776
    @chrisquiett1776 7 років тому +16

    Lol well your dad handled it like shit in the beginning, but glad you guys are still close.

  • @marymargaretmoore9034
    @marymargaretmoore9034 4 роки тому +2

    So sorry you had to go through that. Glad it worked out!

  • @geoffdundee
    @geoffdundee 5 років тому +9

    the father should love and adore every inch of his son..........Khalid has a lovely soul.
    oh and anyone thinking of coming out and the parents blackmailing them telling them they will be disinherited,disowned,etc....my advice is to walk away and make your own way in life.

  • @Allofrancois
    @Allofrancois 3 роки тому

    Really nice and heartfelt coming out story. The smile and genuine love you have for both your parents is to be commended. Even though your dad had a hard time from your coming out, you have both made the effort to grow your relationship.

  • @Dariusissocool
    @Dariusissocool 5 років тому +11

    “Rolling around on the floor” yup that sounds exactly like the dramatics of an immigrant parent.

  • @robotaholic
    @robotaholic 4 роки тому

    I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I'm proud to be in the same community as you! Stay strong 💪 and honest and ppl will respect you.

  • @cloroxbleach8849
    @cloroxbleach8849 5 років тому +3

    My dad would simply try to kill me lol

  • @robertagajeenian7222
    @robertagajeenian7222 4 роки тому +1

    Very nicely expressed. Very complex situation, and to wish it weren't is, as you said, "unrealistic".

  • @orley6379
    @orley6379 8 років тому +107

    im a bisexual muslim ;)

    • @orley6379
      @orley6379 8 років тому +33

      +Peejay Crayod I'm not scared lol. Sure, there's some fucked up shit in the qur'an, but to me Islam is about being a nice and humble person inspired by Allah, not blinding following the Qur'an and never letting your views evolve. Islam doesn't condemn me, people condemn me. As you will see in this comment section there are many lgbtq+ Muslims who obviously don't condemn their own human nature.

    • @medha6735
      @medha6735 8 років тому +17

      Sally Yllas A lot of people don't fully understand Islam in the west (mainly because of the media), but my social studies teacher told us that at its core Islam is a very tolerant religion.

    • @AmeliaPond1994
      @AmeliaPond1994 7 років тому +5

      same. I came out to them when I was 21 and they were both shocked. I'm also bipolar so they attributed my coming out to a manic phase. To this day they think I'm straight and it's painful to pretend but I feel like I have no choice.I don't want to be disowned.

    • @alvarogoogle
      @alvarogoogle 6 років тому +13

      Amelia, you are not your parent's property. Do not live their lives. Live yours.

    • @carloscastellani4253
      @carloscastellani4253 5 років тому +1

      You look it! Lol!

  • @rjcarter2904
    @rjcarter2904 Рік тому +1

    What a lovely young man. So sorry about his challenges. Religion is the root of most of the world's evil.

  • @amaarnazarani9685
    @amaarnazarani9685 Рік тому +3

    I'm a muslim who is a straight ally

  • @AAwildeone
    @AAwildeone 9 років тому +1

    What a beautifully told story! I can feel every step he went through....

  • @leland61
    @leland61 9 років тому +103

    Daddy is a drama queen.

    • @kenroberts9285
      @kenroberts9285 6 років тому

      Leland Somers 68

    • @hardtfelt
      @hardtfelt 6 років тому +1

      Lol I was just about to post that

    • @leoweber3629
      @leoweber3629 5 років тому +7

      Mugdim Kreho ever heard of adoption? Surrogates? Lmfao just because you’re gay doesn’t mean you won’t have children..

    • @geoffdundee
      @geoffdundee 5 років тому +8

      Mugdim Kreho......dont be a dafty.........of course he can have children.....all it takes is a syringe and his sperm squirted inside someone who will carry the baby until its born..............not rocket science is it.

    • @jimjimmyjames59
      @jimjimmyjames59 4 роки тому

      Thank you.

  • @selenaseibt789
    @selenaseibt789 4 роки тому

    Your parents have much to be proud about. You are a good man with much to offer the world. Thank you for sharing your truth.

  • @johnoconnor3820
    @johnoconnor3820 9 років тому +7

    goodness, what a story. If I were 25 years younger I would try to date Khalid. He is so very, very handsome

  • @sheilamacpherson4948
    @sheilamacpherson4948 4 роки тому +1

    I never forget that this is the kind of minefield some people have to walk thru just to be able to live honestly.

  • @carolynroesbery47
    @carolynroesbery47 9 років тому +4

    Oh wow-- On some level he made a difficult change and is able to look beyond the mythology of Gay being a negative thing. This is happening the world over. You are amazing and he knows it

    • @frankpaya690
      @frankpaya690 4 роки тому

      I don't know how old you are, but back in the 80s,for the most part being homosexual was viewed with the same negative passion, that being a child molester is looked at today. it's important to understand at it it's core, anyting people believe in, and feel, usually stems from what they have been hearing from each other, not behind anything they'd experienced, or Thought- out individually, and made up their "own" minds about. The passions of a Lynch mob get passed around among people through hearsay: somebody hears something, and then they start saying it too, without any thinking first.

    • @SB-iy9vn
      @SB-iy9vn 20 днів тому

      @@carolynroesbery47 It is not mythology it is true

  • @MrPerfesser
    @MrPerfesser 6 років тому

    Khalid, you write and speak beautifully, and you are a beautiful soul. Norman Maclean captured the cry of the your father's heart near the end of "A River Runs Through It," when Norman's father, a Presbyterian Minister, laments the loss of his son Paul, and speaks of it in a sermon.
    “Each one of us here today will at one time in our lives look upon a loved one who is in need and ask the same question: We are willing to help, Lord, but what, if anything, is needed? For it is true we can seldom help those closest to us. Either we don't know what part of ourselves to give or, more often than not, the part we have to give is not wanted. And so it is those we live with and should know who elude us. But we can still love them - we can love completely without complete understanding.”
    We CAN love completely without complete understanding, and your father is living proof at that. Love and understanding do not always come at once. But where there is love, understanding and acceptance can grow. Love is at the root of everything. All learning. All relationships. Love, or the lack of it.

  • @putonface
    @putonface 7 років тому +15

    So the father endures such hardships as being a refugee and war but what almost killed him was to find out his son is gay? That's what religious beliefs do to human beings, when their teachings are so distorted.

    • @mirawenya
      @mirawenya 6 років тому +2

      putonface keep in mind that his father actually believes his son will go to hell. That must be a horrible feeling to have. He hasn’t disowned his son or anything. He seems to be doing his best to be supportive.

  • @babydoll2k5
    @babydoll2k5 5 років тому +1

    happy it turned out okay in the end.
    I can't blame the dad because of the hardships he went through that caused him to devout himself to religion and pray for his and everyone's safety. I think because of his trauma he had of war and shit made him believe god will help through hard times so of course when his son says he is someone his religion doesn't approve of-
    he's obviously going to be heartbroken as he wants his son to be safe. but the fact that he overcame that and accepted his son is amazing to me and I think this dude's dad is pretty strong.

  • @danielvortisto6324
    @danielvortisto6324 7 років тому +17

    Religiosity is the cause of such incredibly unreasonable burdens. There is nothing else that I know of that can make a father and a son carry so much burden about the son's sexual orientation than religion. Nothing!

  • @An__-
    @An__- 4 роки тому

    This was excellent. I love that it explores that people are complicated and come with lots of baggage that is often very significant. Khalid had a very traumatizing coming out and yet he still loves his father and his father still loves him. Maybe his father will grow even more with time and maybe he won't but he's still finding a way to express his love and his son understands.

  • @alqiamirzan
    @alqiamirzan 9 років тому +142

    I'm gay muslim :)

    • @radagast25a
      @radagast25a 9 років тому +4

      +alqia mirzan Kindest thoughts and best wishes to you.

    • @alqiamirzan
      @alqiamirzan 9 років тому +1

      Reynolds Jones thank you Reynolds,Have a good day :)

    • @alqiamirzan
      @alqiamirzan 9 років тому +7

      Hastinho777 good for you!walaikumsalam brother

    • @harryfarias555
      @harryfarias555 8 років тому +3

      +CoolStoryBro Who cares islam? allah does NOT exist, and muham mad is fake
      LOL

    • @harryfarias555
      @harryfarias555 8 років тому +5

      +alqia mirzan just FLEE islam and be free ;)

  • @aaronevans5450
    @aaronevans5450 3 роки тому +1

    You seem like a great guy and really enjoyed your story. Thank you for sharing. 😊

  • @rosaviolet5164
    @rosaviolet5164 7 років тому +9

    Gosh that was a drama queen reaction.

    • @EddVCR
      @EddVCR 3 роки тому +1

      Voguing, death dropping, and rolling.

  • @BillyGollnerMusic
    @BillyGollnerMusic 9 років тому +2

    Glad you and your father worked through things.

  • @TomLloyd-18
    @TomLloyd-18 4 роки тому +8

    I'd say that Daddy is the ultimate Drama Queen.

  • @ithinkiknowme6450
    @ithinkiknowme6450 3 роки тому +1

    I’m so happy that he was able to go around his depression and come out to his father but can be for a minute appreciate that fact that he’s so ✨charming ✨ and able to add humour to something so grave.

  • @cmmndrblu
    @cmmndrblu 6 років тому +4

    this guy is very good looking

  • @myboibill
    @myboibill 3 роки тому

    Just watched your video. Granted it’s a long time since you made it. But for all the young guys watching these please note that almost all the parents no matter how understanding to some degree make it about them. Your case was extreme. Most of us guys when we are going through this are still kids at heart yet we are asked after spending our tee plus year sorting ourselves out, well we are asked to be strong and supportive to the people that should be supporting their children.
    Hopefully by the time I have watched this life is good for you and your family.
    We all deserve the happy ending one way or another.
    Thanks for the post.

  • @Steef_Lee
    @Steef_Lee 4 роки тому +7

    Papa is a drama queen lol

  • @ABC_DEF
    @ABC_DEF 6 років тому +1

    Respect to you. I came out to my father 20 years ago (when I was 35) and it would probably be better if I hadn't. So I feel great sympathy for anyone who has told their parents and had a hard time of it.

    • @cyan3504
      @cyan3504 3 роки тому

      It would be better to be hated for who you are instead of love for who you are not

  • @safiyahaba
    @safiyahaba 9 років тому +3

    isnt it praying 5 times a day though?

    • @abcdde3274
      @abcdde3274 9 років тому

      +Safiyah Aba AlKhail Lel. I usually don't do morning prayer. :|.

    • @48acar19
      @48acar19 9 років тому +3

      +Safiyah Aba AlKhail : With a discount of 20% that means only 4 times a day.

    • @48acar19
      @48acar19 9 років тому

      ***** You can add besides the 72 virgin girls also the remaining 28 boys, as cute as pearls, as promised by the Qur'an! Unfortunately nowadays only the Pahstun men seem to care about them! LOL

    • @48acar19
      @48acar19 8 років тому +1

      Zeke Krahlin Sex in the afterlife...
      Somebody needs to be a Muslim to believe that sh@%it!

    • @CH3CH2OCH2CH3net
      @CH3CH2OCH2CH3net 8 років тому +1

      +Zeke Krahlin Sure glad that Ayn Rand and her Objectivist worship of "PRODUCERS" and predatory capitalism isn't a "death cult".
      Even if the Objectivists are as doctrinaire and rigid as the Christian fundagelicals and the Muslim extremists.

  • @Cruznick06
    @Cruznick06 8 років тому +1

    Thank you for sharing your story

  • @TheAlbinoskunk
    @TheAlbinoskunk 8 років тому +7

    PErhaps it's just the lighting, but I totally didn't expect this guy. Like, if I encountered him in person and he then said his name was "Khalid el Khatib" I would be visibly shocked. He's so white
    Have I missed the point of this video slightly?

    • @najeyrifai1134
      @najeyrifai1134 7 років тому +10

      Palestinians are a lot whiter than other Arabs. Some are even blonde or ginger, and they often have green eyes (because history). Add this to the fact his mother is white.

    • @orchardlea
      @orchardlea 6 років тому +1

      Just slightly.

  • @SarahFloria
    @SarahFloria 7 років тому

    What a sweet father. I know there are open ends still and probably always will be because such a thing like a person's opinion (whether flawed) is so hard to change. He seems like a very emotion filled man, quite like his son. Hearing about those cards was nice.

  • @aleinfemale1771
    @aleinfemale1771 Рік тому +3

    I feel so bad for the father. He loves his son but I can literally feel his regret and self-blame because he knows that when his son dies he's going to hell. It's a truth he's sure about but he can't do anything about it. May Allah make it easy for him.

    • @cyssoK
      @cyssoK Рік тому +2

      I don’t feel bad for him at all

    • @Redzwan
      @Redzwan Місяць тому

      Lol. God doesn't exist.

  • @jamessmith4455
    @jamessmith4455 4 роки тому +1

    This is beautiful. A parents love knows no bounds. I don’t agree with the father but it’s nice he can look past it for the sake of his son.